THEOLOGUE. A cant name among collegians for a student in theology.
The hardened hearts of Freshmen andTheologuesburned with righteous indignation.—Yale Tomahawk, May, 1852.
TheTheologsare not so wicked as the Medics.—BurlesqueCatalogue, Yale Coll., 1852-53, p. 30.
THESES-COLLECTOR. One who collects or preparestheses. The following extract from the laws of Harvard College will explain further what is meant by this term. "The President, Professors, and Tutors, annually, some time in the third term, shall select from the Junior Class a number ofTheses-Collectors, to prepare theses for the next year; from which selection they shall appoint so many divisions as shall be equal to the number of branches they may assign. And each one shall, in the particular branch assigned him, collect so many theses as the government may judge expedient; and all the theses, thus collected, shall be delivered to the President, by the Saturday immediately succeeding the end of the Spring vacation in the Senior year, at furthest, from which the President, Professors, and Tutors shall select such as they shall judge proper to be published. But if the theses delivered to the President, in any particular branch, should not afford a sufficient number suitable for publication, a further number shall be required. The name of the student who collected any set or number of theses shall be annexed to the theses collected by him, in every publication. Should any one neglect to collect the theses required of him, he shall be liable to lose his degree."—1814, p. 35.
The Theses-Collectors were formerly chosen by the class, as the following extract from a MS. Journal will show.
"March 27th, 1792. My Class assembled in the chapel to choose theses-collectors, a valedictory orator, and poet. Jackson was chosen to deliver the Latin oration, and Cutler to deliver the poem. Ellis was almost unanimously chosen a collector of the grammatical theses. Prince was chosen metaphysical theses-collector, with considerable opposition. Lowell was chosen mathematical theses-collector, though not unanimously. Chamberlain was chosen physical theses-collector."
THESIS. A position or proposition which a person advances and offers to maintain, or which is actually maintained by argument; a theme; a subject; particularly, a subject or proposition for a school or university exercise, or the exercise itself.—Webster.
In the older American colleges, thethesesheld a prominent place in the exercises of Commencement. At Harvard College the earliest theses extant bear the date of the year 1687. They were Theses Technological, Logical, Grammatical, Rhetorical, Mathematical, and Physical. The last theses were presented in the year 1820. The earliest theses extant belonging to Yale College are of 1714, and the last were printed in 1797.
THIRDING. In England, "a custom practised at the universities, where twothirdsof the original price is allowed by upholsterers to the students for household goods returned them within the year."—Grose's Dict.
On this subject De Quincey says: "The Oxford rule is, that, if you take the rooms (which is at your own option), in that case youthirdthe furniture and the embellishments; i.e. you succeed to the total cost diminished by one third. You pay, therefore, two guineas out of each three to yourimmediatepredecessor."—Life and Manners, p. 250.
THIRD-YEAR MEN. In the University of Cambridge, Eng., the title ofThird-Year Men, or Senior Sophs or Sophisters, is given tostudents during the third year of their residence at theUniversity.
THUNDERING BOLUS. See INTONITANS BOLUS.
TICK. A recitation made by one who does not know of what he is talking.
Ticks, screws, and deads were all put under contribution.—A Tour through College, Boston, 1832, p. 25.
TICKER. One who recites without knowing what he is talking about; one entirely independent of any book-knowledge.
If any "Ticker" dare to lookA stealthy moment on his book.Harvardiana, Vol. III. p. 123.
TICKING. The act of reciting without knowing anything about the lesson.
And what withticking, screwing, and deading, am candidate for a piece of parchment to-morrow.—Harv. Reg., p. 194.
TIGHT. A common slang term among students; the comparative, of whichdrunkis the superlative.
Some twenty of as jolly chaps as e'er got jollytight.Poem before Y.H., 1849.
Hast spent the livelong nightIn smoking Esculapios,—in getting jollytight?Poem before Iadma, 1850.
He clenched his fist as fain for fight,Sank back, and gently murmured "tight."MS. Poem, W.F. Allen, 1848.
While fathers, are bursting with rage and spite,And old ladies vow that the students aretight.Yale Gallinipper, Nov. 1848.
Speaking of the word "drunk," the Burlington Sentinel remarks: "The last synonyme that we have observed is 'tight,' a term, it strikes us, rather inappropriate, since a 'tight' man, in the cant use of the word, is almost always a 'loose character.' We give a list of a few of the various words and phrases which have been in use, at one time or another, to signify some stage of inebriation: Over the bay, half seas over, hot, high, corned, cut, cocked, shaved, disguised, jammed, damaged, sleepy, tired, discouraged, snuffy, whipped, how come ye so, breezy, smoked, top-heavy, fuddled, groggy, tipsy, smashed, swipy, slewed, cronk, salted down, how fare ye, on the lee lurch, all sails set, three sheets in the wind, well under way, battered, blowing, snubbed, sawed, boosy, bruised, screwed, soaked, comfortable, stimulated, jug-steamed, tangle-legged, fogmatic, blue-eyed, a passenger in the Cape Ann stage, striped, faint, shot in the neck, bamboozled, weak-jointed, got a brick in his hat, got a turkey on his back."
Dr. Franklin, in speaking of the intemperate drinker, says, he will never, or seldom, allow that he is drunk; he may be "boosy, cosey, foxed, merry, mellow, fuddled, groatable, confoundedly cut, may see two moons, be among the Philistines, in a very good humor, have been in the sun, is a little feverish, pretty well entered, &c., butnever drunk."
A highly entertaining list of the phrases which the Germans employ "to clothe in a tolerable garb of decorum that dreamy condition into which Bacchus frequently throws his votaries," is given inHowitt's Student Life of Germany, Am. ed., pp. 296, 297.
See SPRUNG.
2. At Williams College, this word is sometimes used as an exclamation; e.g. "Otight!"
TIGHT FIT. At the University of Vermont, a good joke is denominated by the students atight fit, and the jokee is said to be "hard up."
TILE. A hat. Evidently suggested by the meaning of the word, a covering for the roof of buildings.
Then, taking it from off his head, began to brush his "tile."Poem before the Iadma, 1850.
TOADY. A fawning, obsequious parasite; a toad-eater. In college cant, one who seeks or gains favor with an instructor or popularity with his classmates by mean and sycophantic actions.
TOADY. To flatter any one for gain.—Halliwell.
TOM. The great bell of Christ Church, Oxford, which formerly belonged to Osney Abbey.
"This bell," says the Oxford Guide, "was recast in 1680, its weight being about 17,000 pounds; more than double the weight of the great bell in St. Paul's, London. This bell has always been represented as one of the finest in England, but even at the risk of dispelling an illusion under which most Oxford men have labored, and which every member of Christ Church has indulged in from 1680 to the present time, touching the fancied superiority of mighty Tom, it must be confessed that it is neither an accurate nor a musical bell. The note, as we are assured by the learned in these matters, ought to be B flat, but is not so. On the contrary, the bell is imperfect and inharmonious, and requires, in the opinion of those best informed, and of most experience, to be recast. It is, however, still a great curiosity, and may be seen by applying to the porter at Tom-Gate lodge."—Ed. 1847, p. 5, note a.
TO THEn(-th.), TO THEn + 1(-th.)Among English Cantabs these algebraic expressions are used as intensives to denote the most energetic way of doing anything.—Bristed.
TOWNEY. The name by which a student in an American college is accustomed to designate any young man residing in the town in which the college is situated, who is not a collegian.
AndTowneysleft when she showed fight.Pow-wow of Class of '58, Yale Coll.
TRANSLATION. The act of turning one language into another.
At the University of Cambridge, Eng., this word is applied more particularly to the turning of Greek or Latin into English.
In composition and cram I was yet untried, and thetranslationsin lecture-room were not difficult to acquit one's self on respectably.—Bristed's Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, p. 34.
TRANSMITTENDUM,pl.TRANSMITTENDA or TRANSMITTENDUMS. Anything transmitted, or handed down from one to another.
Students, on withdrawing from college, often leave in the room which they last occupied, pictures, looking-glasses, chairs, &c., there to remain, and to be handed down to the latest posterity. Articles thus left are calledtransmittenda.
The Great Mathematical Slate was atransmittendumto the best mathematical scholar in each class.—MS. note in Cat. Med. Fac. Soc., 1833, p. 16.
TRENCHER-CAP. A-name, sometimes given to the square head-covering worn by students in the English universities. Used figuratively to denote collegiate power.
Thetrencher-caphas claimed a right to take its part in the movements which make or mar the destinies of nations, by the side of plumed casque and priestly tiara.—The English Universities and their Reforms, inBlackwood's Mag., Feb. 1849.
TRIANGLE. At Union College, a urinal, so called from its shape.
TRIENNIAL, or TRIENNIAL CATALOGUE. In American colleges, a catalogue issued once in three years. This catalogue contains the names of the officers and students, arranged according to the years in which they were connected with the college, an account of the high public offices which they have filled, degrees which they have received, time of death, &c.[66]
TheTriennial Cataloguebecomes increasingly a mournful record—it should be monitory, as well as mournful—to survivors, looking at the stars thickening on it, from one date to another.—Scenes and Characters in College, p. 198.
Our tale shall be told by a silent star,On the page of some futureTriennial.Class Poem, Harv. Coll., 1849, p. 4.
TRIMESTER. Latintrimestris;tres, three, andmensis, month. In the German universities, a term or period of three months.—Webster.
TRINITARIAN. The popular name of a member of Trinity College in the University of Cambridge, Eng.
TRIPOS,pl.TRIPOSES. At Cambridge, Eng., any university examination for honors, of questionists or men who have just taken their B.A. The university scholarship examinations are not calledtriposes.—Bristed.
The Classical Tripos is generally spoken of asthe Tripos, theMathematical one as the Degree Examination.—Ibid., p. 170.
2. A tripos paper.
3. One who prepares a tripos paper.—Webster.
TRIPOS PAPER. At the University of Cambridge, England, a printed list of the successful candidates for mathematical honors, accompanied by a piece in Latin verse. There are two of these, designed to commemorate the two Tripos days. The first contains the names of the Wranglers and Senior Optimes, and the second the names of the Junior Optimes. The wordtriposis supposed to refer to the three-legged stool formerly used at the examinations for these honors, though some derive it from the threebracketsformerly printed on the back of the paper.
Classical Tripos Examination. The final university examination for classical honors, optional to all who have taken the mathematical honors.—C.A. Bristed, inWebster's Dict.
The Tripos Paper is more fully described in the annexed extract. "The names of the Bachelors who were highest in the list (Wranglers and Senior Optimes,Baccalaurei quibus sua reservatur senioritas Comitiis prioribus, and Junior Optimes,Comitiis posterioribus) were written on slips of paper; and on the back of these papers, probably with a view of making them less fugitive and more entertaining, was given a copy of Latin verses. These verses were written by one of the new Bachelors, and the exuberant spirits and enlarged freedom arising from the termination of the Undergraduate restrictions often gave to these effusions a character of buffoonery and satire. The writer was termedTerræ Filius, orTripos, probably from some circumstance in the mode of his making his appearance and delivering his verses; and took considerable liberties. On some occasions, we find that these went so far as to incur the censure of the authorities. Even now, the Tripos verses often aim at satire and humor. [It is customary to have one serious and one humorous copy of verses.] The writer does not now appear in person, but the Tripos Paper, the list of honors with its verses, still comes forth at its due season, and the list itself has now taken the name of the Tripos. This being the case with the list of mathematical honors, the same name has been extended to the list of classical honors, though unaccompanied by its classical verses."—Whewell on Cambridge Education, Preface to Part II., quoted inBristed's Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, p. 25.
TRUMP. A jolly blade; a merry fellow; one who occupies among his companions a position similar to that which trumps hold to the other cards in the pack. Not confined in its use to collegians, but much in vogue among them.
But soon he treads this classic ground,Where knowledge dwells andtrumpsabound.MS. Poem.
TRUSTEE. A person to whom property is legally committed intrust, to be applied either for the benefit of specified individuals, or for public uses.—Webster.
In many American colleges the general government is vested in a board oftrustees, appointed differently in different colleges.
See CORPORATION and OVERSEER.
TUFT-HUNTER. A cant term, in the English universities, for a hanger-on to noblemen and persons of quality. So called from thetuftin the cap of the latter.—Halliwell.
There are few such thoroughtuft-huntersas your genuine OxfordDon.—Blackwood's Mag., Eng. ed., Vol. LVI. p. 572.
TUITION. In universities, colleges, schools, &c., the money paid for instruction. In American colleges, the tuition is from thirty to seventy dollars a year.
TUTE. Abbreviation for Tutor.
TUTOR. Latin; fromtueor, to defend; French,tuteur.
In English universities and colleges, an officer or member of some hall, who has the charge of hearing the lessons of the students, and otherwise giving them instruction in the sciences and various branches of learning.
In the American colleges, tutors are graduates selected by the trustees, for the instruction of undergraduates of the first three years. They are usually officers of the institution, who have a share, with the president and professors, in the government of the students.—Webster.
TUTORAGE. In the English universities, the guardianship exerted by a tutor; the care of a pupil.
The next item which I shall notice is that which in college bills is expressed by the wordTutorage.—De Quincey's Life and Manners, p. 251.
TUTOR, CLASS. At some of the colleges in the United States, each of the four classes is assigned to the care of a particular tutor, who acts as the ordinary medium of communication between the members of the class and the Faculty, and who may be consulted by the students concerning their studies, or on any other subject interesting to them in their relations to the college.
At Harvard College, in addition to these offices, the Class Tutors grant leave of absence from church and from town for Sunday, including Saturday night, on the presentation of a satisfactory reason, and administer all warnings and private admonitions ordered by the Faculty for misconduct or neglect of duty.—Orders and Regulations of the Faculty of Harv. Coll., July, 1853, pp. 1, 2.
Of this regulation as it obtained at Harvard during the latter part of the last century, Professor Sidney Willard says: "Each of the Tutors had one class, of which he was charged with a certain oversight, and of which he was called the particular Tutor. The several Tutors in Latin successively sustained this relation to my class. Warnings of various kinds, private admonitions for negligence or minor offences, and, in general, intercommunication between his class and the Immediate Government, were the duties belonging to this relation."—Memories of Youth and Manhood, Vol. I. p. 266, note.
TUTOR, COLLEGE. At the universities of Oxford and Cambridge, an officer connected with a college, whose duties are described in the annexed extracts.
With reference to Oxford, De Quincey remarks: "Each college takes upon itself the regular instruction of its separate inmates,—of these and of no others; and for this office it appoints, after careful selection, trial, and probation, the best qualified amongst those of its senior members who choose to undertake a trust of such heavy responsibility. These officers are called Tutors; and they are connected by duties and by accountability, not with the University at all, but with their own private colleges. The public tutors appointed in each college [are] on the scale of one to each dozen or score of students."—Life and Manners, Boston, 1851, p. 252.
Bristed, writing of Cambridge, says: "When, therefore, a boy, or, as we should call him, a young man, leaves his school, public or private, at the age of eighteen or nineteen, and 'goes up' to the University, he necessarily goes up to some particular college, and the first academical authority he makes acquaintance with in the regular order of things is the College Tutor. This gentleman has usually taken high honors either in classics or mathematics, and one of his duties is naturally to lecture. But this by no means constitutes the whole, or forms the most important part, of his functions. He is the medium of all the students' pecuniary relations with the College. He sends in their accounts every term, and receives the money through his banker; nay, more, he takes in the bills of their tradesmen, and settles them also. Further, he has the disposal of the college rooms, and assigns them to their respective occupants. When I speak of the CollegeTutor, it must not be supposed that one man is equal to all this work in a large college,—Trinity, for instance, which usually numbers four hundred Undergraduates in residence. A large college has usually two Tutors,—Trinity has three,—and the students are equally divided among them,—on their sides, the phrase is,—without distinction of year, or, as we should call it, ofclass. The jurisdiction of the rooms is divided in like manner. The Tutor is supposed to standin loco parentis; but having sometimes more than a hundred young men under him, he cannot discharge his duties in this respect very thoroughly, nor is it generally expected that he should."—Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, pp. 10, 11.
TUTORIAL. Belonging to or exercised by a tutor or instructor.
Even while he is engaged in his "tutorial" duties, &c.—Am.Lit. Mag., Vol. IV. p. 409.
TUTORIC. Pertaining to a tutor.
A collection of two was not then considered a sure prognostic of rebellion, and spied out vigilantly bytutoriceyes.—Harvardiana, Vol. III. p. 314.
TUTORIFIC. The same astutoric.
While thus in doubt they hesitating stand,Approaches near theTutorificband.Yale Tomahawk, May, 1852.
"Old Yale," of thee we sing, thou art our theme,Of thee with all thyTutorifichost.—Ibid.
TUTORING FRESHMEN. Of the various means used by Sophomores to trouble Freshmen, that oftutoringthem, as described in the following extract from the Sketches of Yale College, is not at all peculiar to that institution, except in so far as the name is concerned.
"The ancient customs of subordination among the classes, though long since abrogated, still preserve a part of their power over the students, not only of this, but of almost every similar institution. The recently exalted Sophomore, the dignified Junior, and the venerable Senior, look back with equal humor at the 'greenness' of their first year. The former of these classes, however, is chiefly notorious in the annals of Freshman capers. To them is allotted the duty of fumigating the room of the new-comer, and preparing him, by a due induction into the mysteries of Yale, for the duties of his new situation. Of these performances, the most systematic is commonly styledTutoring, from the character assumed by the officiating Sophomore. Seated solemnly in his chair of state, arrayed in a pompous gown, with specs and powdered hair, he awaits the approach of the awe-struck subject, who has been duly warned to attend his pleasure, and fitly instructed to make a low reverence and stand speechless until addressed by his illustrious superior. A becoming impression has also been conveyed of the dignity, talents, and profound learning and influence into the congregated presence of which he is summoned. Everything, in short, which can increase his sufficiently reverent emotions, or produce a readier or more humble obedience, is carefully set forth, till he is prepared to approach the door with no little degree of that terror with which the superstitious inquirer enters the mystic circle of the magician. A shaded light gleams dimly out into the room, and pours its fuller radiance upon a ponderous volume of Hebrew; a huge pile of folios rests on the table, and the eye of the fearful Freshman half ventures to discover that they are tomes of the dead languages.
"But first he has, in obedience to his careful monitor, bowed lowly before the dignified presence; and, hardly raising his eyes, he stands abashed at his awful situation, waiting the supreme pleasure of the supposed officer. A benignant smile lights up the tutor's grave countenance; he enters strangely enough into familiar talk with the recently admitted collegiate; in pathetic terms he describes the temptations of thisgreatcity, the thousand dangers to which he will be exposed, the vortex of ruin into which, if he walks unwarily, he will be surely plunged. He fires the youthful ambition with glowing descriptions of the honors that await the successful, and opens to his eager view the dazzling prospect of college fame. Nor does he fail to please the youthful aspirant with assurances of the kindly notice of the Faculty; he informs him of the satisfactory examination he has passed, and the gratification of the President at his uncommon proficiency; and having thus filled the buoyant imagination of his dupe with the most glowing college air-castles, dismisses him from his august presence, after having given him especial permission to call on any important occasion hereafter."—pp. 159-162.
TUTOR, PRIVATE. At the Universities of Oxford and Cambridge, an instructor, whose position and studies are set forth in the following extracts.
"Besides the public tutors appointed in each college," says De Quincey, writing of Oxford, "there are also tutors strictly private, who attend any students in search of special and extraordinary aid, on terms settled privately by themselves. Of these persons, or their existence, the college takes no cognizance." "These are the working agents in the Oxford system." "TheTutorsof Oxford correspond to theProfessorsof other universities."—Life and Manners, Boston, 1851, pp. 252, 253.
Referring to Cambridge, Bristed remarks: "The private tutor at an English university corresponds, as has been already observed, in many respects, to theprofessorat a German. The German professor is notnecessarilyattached to any specific chair; he receives nofixedstipend, and has not public lecture-rooms; he teaches at his own house, and the number of his pupils depends on his reputation. The Cambridge private tutor is also a graduate, who takes pupils at his rooms in numbers proportionate to his reputation and ability. And although while the German professor is regularly licensed as such by his university, and the existence of the private tutoras suchis not even officially recognized by his, still this difference is more apparent than real; for the English university hasvirtuallylicensed the tutor to instruct in a particular branch by the standing she has given him in her examinations." "Students come up to the University with all degrees of preparation…. To make up for former deficiences, and to direct study so that it may not be wasted, are twodesideratawhich probably led to the introduction of private tutors, once a partial, now a general appliance."—Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, pp. 146-148.
TUTORSHIP. The office of a tutor.—Hooker.
In the following passage, this word is used as a titulary compellation, like the wordlordship.
One morning, as the story goes,Before histutorshiparose.—Rebelliad, p. 73.
TUTORS' PASTURE. In 1645, John Bulkley, the "first Master of Arts in Harvard College," by a deed, gave to Mr. Dunster, the President of that institution, two acres of land in Cambridge, during his life. The deed then proceeds: "If at any time he shall leave the Presidency, or shall decease, I then desire the College to appropriate the same to itself for ever, as a small gift from an alumnus, bearing towards it the greatest good-will." "After President Dunster's resignation," says Quincy, "the Corporation gave the income of Bulkley's donation to the tutors, who received it for many years, and hence the enclosure obtained the name of 'Tutors' Pasture,' or 'Fellows' Orchard.'" In the Donation Book of the College, the deed is introduced as "Extractum Doni Pomarii Sociorum per Johannem Bulkleium."—Quincy's Hist. Harv. Univ., Vol. I. pp. 269, 270.
For further remarks on this subject, see Peirce's "History ofHarvard University," pp. 15, 81, 113, also Chap. XIII., and"Memorial of John S. Popkin, D.D.," pp. 390, 391.
TWITCH A TWELVE. At Middlebury College, to make a perfect recitation; twelve being the maximum mark for scholarship.
UGLY KNIFE. See JACK-KNIFE.
UNDERGRADUATE. A student, or member of a university or college, who has not taken his first degree.—Webster.
UNDERGRADUATE. Noting or pertaining to a student of a college who has not taken his first degree.
Theundergraduatestudents shall be divided into four distinct classes.—Laws Yale Coll., 1837, p. 11.
With these theundergraduatecourse is not intended to interfere.—Yale Coll. Cat., 1850-51, p. 33.
UNDERGRADUATESHIP. The state of being an undergraduate.—Life ofPaley.
UNIVERSITY. An assemblage of colleges established in any place, with professors for instructing students in the sciences and other branches of learning, and where degrees are conferred. Auniversityis properly a universal school, in which are taught all branches of learning, or the four faculties of theology, medicine, law, and the sciences and arts.—Cyclopædia.
2. At some American colleges, a name given to a university student. The regulation in reference to this class at Union College is as follows:—"Students, not regular members of college, are allowed, as university students, to prosecute any branches for which they are qualified, provided they attend three recitations daily, and conform in all other respects to the laws of College. On leaving College, they receive certificates of character and scholarship."—Union Coll. Cat., 1850.
The eyes of several Freshmen andUniversitiesshone with a watery lustre.—The Parthenon, Vol. I. p. 20.
UP. To beupin a subject, is to be informed in regard to it.Postedexpresses a similar idea. The use of this word, although common among collegians, is by no means confined to them.
In our past history, short as it is, we would hardly expect them to be wellup.—Bristed's Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, p. 28.
He is wellupin metaphysics.—Ibid., p. 53.
UPPER HOUSE. See SENATE.
VACATION. The intermission of the regular studies and exercises of a college or other seminary, when the students have a recess.—Webster.
In the University of Cambridge, Eng., there are three vacations during each year. Christmas vacation begins on the 16th of December, and ends on the 13th of January. Easter vacation begins on the Friday before Palm Sunday, and ends on the eleventh day after Easter-day. The Long vacation begins on the Friday succeeding the first Tuesday in July, and ends on the 10th of October. At the University of Oxford there are four vacations in each year. At Dublin University there are also four vacations, which correspond nearly with the vacations of Oxford.
See TERM.
VALEDICTION. A farewell; a bidding farewell. Used sometimes with the meaning ofvaledictoryorvaledictory oration.
Two publick Orations, by the Candidates: the one to give a specimen of their Knowledge, &c., and the other to give a grateful and pathetickValedictionto all the Officers and Members of the Society.—Clap's Hist. Yale Coll., p. 87.
VALEDICTORIAN. The student of a college who pronounces the valedictory oration at the annual Commencement.—Webster.
VALEDICTORY. In American colleges, a farewell oration or address spoken at Commencement, by a member of the class which receive the degree of Bachelor of Arts, and take their leave of college and of each other.
VARMINT. At Cambridge, England, and also among the whip gentry, this word signifies natty, spruce, dashing; e.g. he is quitevarmint; he sports avarminthat, coat, &c.
Avarmintman spurns a scholarship, would consider it a degradation to be a fellow.—Gradus ad Cantab., p. 122.
The handsome man, my friend and pupil, was naturally enough a bit of a swell, orvarmintman.—Alma Mater, Vol. II. p. 118.
VERGER. At the University of Oxford, an officer who walks first in processions, and carries a silver rod.
VICE-CHANCELLOR. An officer in a university, in England, a distinguished member, who is annually elected to manage the affairs in the absence of the Chancellor. He must be the head of a college, and during his continuance in office he acts as a magistrate for the university, town, and county.—Cam. Cal.
At Oxford, the Vice-Chancellor holds a court, in which suits may be brought against any member of the University. He never walks out, without being preceded by a Yeoman-Bedel with his silver staff. At Cambridge, the Mayor and Bailiffs of the town are obliged, at their election, to take certain oaths before the Vice-Chancellor. The Vice-Chancellor has the sole right of licensing wine and ale-houses in Cambridge, and ofdiscommuningany tradesman or inhabitant who has violated the University privileges or regulations. In both universities, the Vice-Chancellor is nominated by the Heads of Houses, from among themselves.
VICE-MASTER. An officer of a college in the English universities who performs the duties of the Master in his absence.
VISITATION. The act of a superior or superintending officer, who visits a corporation, college, church, or other house, to examine into the manner in which it is conducted, and see that its laws and regulations are duly observed and executed.—Cyc.
In July, 1766, a law was formally enacted, "that twice in the year, viz. at the semiannualvisitationof the committee of the Overseers, some of the scholars, at the direction of the President and Tutors, shall publicly exhibit specimens of their proficiency," &c.—Quincy's Hist. Harv. Univ., Vol. II. p. 132.
VIVA VOCE. Latin; literally,with the living voice. In the English universities, that part of an examination which is carried on orally.
The examination involves a littleviva voce, and it was said, that, if a man did hisviva vocewell, none of his papers were looked at but the Paley.—Bristed's Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, p. 92.
In Combination Room, where once I sat atviva voce, wretched, ignorant, the wine goes round, and wit, and pleasant talk.—Household Words, Am. ed., Vol. XI. p. 521.
WALLING. At the University of Oxford, the punishment ofwalling, as it is popularly denominated, consists in confining a student to the walls of his college for a certain period.
WARDEN. The master or president of a college.—England.
WARNING. In many colleges, when it is ascertained that a student is not living in accordance with the laws of the institution, he is usually informed of the fact by awarning, as it is called, from one of the faculty, which consists merely of friendly caution and advice, thus giving him an opportunity, by correcting his faults, to escape punishment.
Sadly I feel I should have been saved by numerouswarnings.Harvardiana, Vol. III. p. 98.
No more shall "warnings" in their hearing ring,Nor "admonitions" haunt their aching head.Yale Lit. Mag., Vol. XV. p. 210.
WEDGE. At the University of Cambridge, Eng., the man whose name is the last on the list of honors in the voluntary classical examination, which follows the last examination required by statute, is called thewedge. "The last man is called thewedge" says Bristed, "corresponding to the Spoon in Mathematics. This name originated in that of the man who was last on the first Tripos list (in 1824),Wedgewood. Some one suggested that thewooden wedgewas a good counterpart to thewooden spoon, and the appellation stuck."—Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, p. 253.
WET. To christen a new garment by treating one's friends when one first appears in it; e.g.:—A. "Have youwetthat new coat yet?" B. "No." A. "Well, then, I should recommend to you the propriety of so doing." B. "What will you drink?" This word, although much used among students, is by no means confined to them.
WHINNICK. At Hamilton College, to refuse to fulfil a promise or engagement; to retreat from a difficulty; to back out.
WHITE-HOOD HOUSE. See SENATE.
WIGS. The custom of wearing wigs was, perhaps, observed nowhere in America during the last century with so much particularity as at the older colleges. Of this the following incident is illustrative. Mr. Joseph Palmer, who graduated at Harvard in the year 1747, entered college at the age of fourteen; but, although so young, was required immediately after admission to cut off his long, flowing hair, and to cover his head with an unsightly bag-wig. At the beginning of the present century, wigs were not wholly discarded, although the fashion of wearing the hair in a queue was more in vogue. From a record of curious facts, it appears that the last wig which appeared at Commencement in Harvard College was worn by Mr. John Marsh, in the year 1819.
See DRESS.
WILL. At Harvard College, it was at one time the mode for the student to whom had been given the JACK-KNIFE in consequence of his ugliness, to transmit the inheritance, when he left, to some one of equal pretensions in the class next below him. At one period, this transmission was effected by awill, in which not only the knife, but other articles, were bequeathed. As the 21st of June was, till of late years, the day on which the members of the Senior Class closed their collegiate studies, and retired to make preparations for the ensuing Commencement, Wills were usually dated at that time. The first will of this nature of which mention is made is that of Mr. William Biglow, a member of the class of 1794, and the recipient for that year of the knife. It appeared in the department entitled "Omnium Gatherum" of the Federal Orrery, published at Boston, April 27, 1795, in these words:—
"I, CHARLEY CHATTER, sound of mind,To making fun am much inclined;So, having cause to apprehendMy college life is near its end,All future quarrels to prevent,I seal this will and testament.
"My soul and body, while together,I send the storms of life to weather;To steer as safely as they can,To honor GOD, and profit man.
"Imprimis, then, my bed and bedding,My only chattels worth the sledding,Consisting of a maple stead,A counterpane, and coverlet,Two cases with the pillows in,A blanket, cord, a winch and pin,Two sheets, a feather bed and hay-tick,I order sledded up toNatick,And that with care the sledder save themFor those kind parents, first who gave them.
"Item. The Laughing Club, so blest,Who think this life what 't is,—a jest,—Collect its flowers from every spray,And laugh its goading thorns away;From whom to-morrow I dissever,Take one sweet grin, and leave for ever;My chest, and all that in it is,I give and I bequeath them, viz.:Westminster grammar, old and poor,Another one, compiled by Moor;A bunch of pamphlets pro and conThe doctrine of salva-ti-on;The college laws, I'm freed from minding,A Hebrew psalter, stripped from binding.A Hebrew Bible, too, lies nigh it,Unsold—because no one would buy it.
"My manuscripts, in prose and verse,They take for better and for worse;Their minds enlighten with the best,And pipes and candles with the rest;Provided that from them they cullMy college exercises dull,On threadbare theme, with mind unwilling,Strained out through fear of fine one shilling,To teachers paid t' avert an evil,Like Indian worship to the Devil.The above-named manuscripts, I say.To club aforesaid I convey,Provided that said themes, so given,Full proofs thatgenius won't be driven,To our physicians be presented,As the best opiates yet invented.
"Item. The government of college,Those liberalhelluosof knowledge,Who, e'en in these degenerate days,Deserve the world's unceasing praise;Who, friends of science and of men,Stand forth Gomorrah's righteous ten;On them I naught but thanks bestow,For, like my cash, my credit's low;So I can give nor clothes nor wines,But bid them welcome to my fines.
"Item. My study desk of pine,That work-bench, sacred to the nine,Which oft hath groaned beneath my metre,I give to pay my debts to PETER.
"Item. Two penknives with white handles,A bunch of quills, and pound of candles,A lexicon compiled by COLE,A pewter spoon, and earthen bowl,A hammer, and two homespun towels,For which I yearn with tender bowels,Since I no longer can control them,I leave to those sly lads who stole them.
"Item. A gown much greased in Commons,A hat between a man's and woman's,A tattered coat of college blue,A fustian waistcoat torn in two,With all my rust, through college carried,I give to classmate O——,[67] who'smarried.
"Item. C——— P———s[68] has my knife,During his natural college life,—That knife, which ugliness inherits,And due to his superior merits;And when from Harvard he shall steer,I order him to leave it here,That 't may from class to class descend,Till time and ugliness shall end.
"The said C——— P———s, humor's son,Who long shall stay when I am gone,The Muses' most successful suitor,I constitute my executor;And for his trouble to requite him,Member of Laughing Club I write him.
"Myself on life's broad sea I throw,Sail with its joy, or stem its woe,No other friend to take my part,Than careless head and honest heart.My purse is drained, my debts are paid,My glass is run, my will is made,To beauteous Cam. I bid adieu,And with the world begin anew."
Following the example of his friend Biglow, Mr. Prentiss, on leaving college, prepared a will, which afterwards appeared in one of the earliest numbers of the Rural Repository, a literary paper, the publication of which he commenced at Leominster, Mass., in the autumn of 1795. Thomas Paine, afterwards Robert Treat Paine, Jr., immediately transferred it to the columns of the Federal Orrery, which paper he edited, with these introductory remarks: "Having, in the second number of 'Omnium Gatherum' presented to our readers the last will and testament of Charles Chatterbox, Esq., of witty memory, wherein the said Charles, now deceased, did lawfully bequeath to Ch——s Pr——s the celebrated 'Ugly Knife,' to be by him transmitted, at his collegiate demise, to the next succeeding candidate;… and whereas the said Ch——-s Pr——-s, on the 21st of June last, departed his aforesaid 'college life,' thereby leaving to the inheritance of his successor the valuable legacy, which his illustrious friend had bequeathed, as anentailed estate, to the poets of the university,—we have thought proper to insert a full, true, and attested copy of the will of the last deceased heir, in order that the world may be furnished with a correct genealogy of this renownedjack-knife, whose pedigree will become as illustrious in after time as the family of the 'ROLLES,' and which will be celebrated by future wits as the most formidableweaponof modern genius."
"I, Pr——-s Ch——s, of judgment sound,In soul, in limb and wind, now found;I, since my head is full of wit,And must be emptied, or must split,In name ofpresidentAPOLLO,And other gentle folks, that follow:Such as URANIA and CLIO,To whom my fame poetic I owe;With the whole drove of rhyming sisters,For whom my heart with rapture blisters;Who swim in HELICON uncertainWhether a petticoat or shirt on,From vulgar ken their charms do cover,From every eye butMuses' lover;In name of every ugly GOD;Whose beauty scarce outshines a toad;In name of PROSERPINE and PLUTO,Who board in hell's sublimest grotto;In name of CERBERUS and FURIES,Those damnedaristocratsand tories;In presence of two witnesses,Who are as homely as you please,Who are in truth, I'd not belie 'em,Ten times as ugly, faith, as I am;But being, as most people tell us,A pair of jolly clever fellows,And classmates likewise, at this time,They sha'n't be honored in my rhyme.I—I say I, now make this will;Let those whom I assign fulfil.I give, grant, render, and conveyMy goods and chattels thus away:Thathonor of a college life,That celebratedUGLY KNIFE,Which predecessor SAWNEY[69] orders,Descending to time's utmost borders,Tonoblest bard of homeliest phiz,To have and hold and use as his;I now present C——s P——y S——r,[70]To keep with his poetic lumber,To scrape his quid, and make a split,To point his pen for sharpening wit;And order that he ne'er abuseSaid Ugly Knife, in dirtier use,And let said CHARLES, that best of writers,In prose satiric skilled to bite us,And equally in verse delight us,Take special care to keep it cleanFrom unpoetic hands,—I ween.And when those walls, the Muses' seat,Said S——r is obliged to quit,Let some one of APOLLO'S firing,To such heroic joys aspiring,Who long has borne a poet's name,With said knife cut his way to fame.
"I give to those that fish for parts,Long sleepless nights, and aching hearts,A little soul, a fawning spirit,With half a grain of plodding merit,Which is, as Heaven I hope will say,Giving what's not my own away.
"Thoseoven bakedorgoose egg folded,Who, though so often I have told it,With all my documents to show it,Will scarce believe that I'm a poet,I give of criticism the lensWith half an ounce of common sense.
"And 't would a breach be of humanity,Not to bequeath D—-n[71] my vanity;For 'tis a rule direct from Heaven,To him that hath, more shall be given.
"Item. Tom M——n,[72] COLLEGE LION,Who'd ne'er spend cash enough to buy one,The BOANERGES of a pun,A man of science and of fun,That quite uncommon witty elf,Who darts his bolts and shoots himself,Who oft hath bled beneath my jokes,I give my oldtobacco-box.
"MyCentinels[73] for some years past,So neatly bound with thread and paste,Exposing Jacobinic tricks,I give my chumfor politics.
"My neckcloth, dirty, old, yetstrong,That round my neck has lasted long,I give BIG BOY, for deed of pith,Namely, to hang himself therewith.
"To those who've parts at exhibitionObtained by long, unwearied fishing,I say, to such unlucky wretches,I give, for wear, a brace of breeches;Then used; as they're but little tore,I hope they'll show their tails no more.
"And ere it quite has gone to rot,I, B—— give my blue great-coat,With all its rags, and dirt, and tallow,Because he's such a dirty fellow.
"Now for my books; first,Bunyan's Pilgrim,(As he with thankful pleasure will grin,)Though dog-leaved, torn, in bad type set in,'T will do quite well for classmate B——,And thus, with complaisance to treat her,'T will answer for another Detur.
"To him that occupies my study,I give, for use of making toddy,A bottle full ofwhite-faceSTINGO,Another, handy, called amingo.My wit, as I've enough to spare,And many much in want there are,I ne'er intend to keep athome,But give to those that handiest come,Having due caution,whereandwhen,Never to spattergentlemen.The world's loud call I can't refuse,The fine productions of my muse;Ifimpudencetofameshall waft her,I'll give the public all, hereafter.My love-songs, sorrowful, complaining,(The recollection puts me pain in,)The last sad groans of deep despair,That once could all my entrails tear;My farewell sermon to the ladies;My satire on a woman's head-dress;My epigram so full of glee,Pointed as epigrams should be;My sonnets soft, and sweet as lasses,My GEOGRAPHY of MOUNT PARNASSUS;With all the bards that round it gather,And variations of the weather;Containing more true humorous satire,Than's oft the lot of human nature;('O dear, what can the matter be!'I've given away myvanity;The vessel can't so much contain,It runs o'er and comes back again.)My blank verse, poems so majestic,My rhymes heroic, tales agrestic;The whole, I say, I'll overhaul 'em,Collect and publish in a volume.
"My heart, which thousand ladies crave,That I intend my wife shall have.I'd give my foibles to the wind,And leave my vices all behind;But much I fear they'll to me stick,Where'er I go, through thin and thick.On WISDOM'Shorse, oh, might I ride,Whose steps let PRUDENCE' bridle guide.Thy loudest voice, O REASON, lend,And thou, PHILOSOPHY, befriend.May candor all my actions guide,And o'er my every thought preside,And in thy ear, O FORTUNE, one word,Let thy swelled canvas bear me onward,Thy favors let me ever see,And I'll be much obliged to thee;And come with blooming visage meek,Come, HEALTH, and ever flush my cheek;O bid me in the morning rise,When tinges Sol the eastern skies;At breakfast, supper-time, or dinner,Let me against thee be no sinner.
"And when the glass of life is run,And I behold my setting sun,May conscience sound be my protection,And no ungrateful recollection,No gnawing cares nor tumbling woes,Disturb the quiet of life's close.And when Death's gentle feet shall comeTo bear me to my endless home,Oh! may my soul, should Heaven but save it,Safely return to GOD who gave it."Federal Orrery, Oct. 29, 1795.Buckingham's Reminiscences,Vol. II. pp. 228-231, 268-273.
It is probable that the idea of a "College Will" was suggested to Biglow by "Father Abbey's Will," portions of which, till the present generation, were "familiar to nearly all the good housewives of New England." From the history of this poetical production, which has been lately printed for private circulation by the Rev. John Langdon Sibley of Harvard College, the annexed transcript of the instrument itself, together with the love-letter which was suggested by it, has been taken. The instances in which the accepted text differs from a Broadside copy, in the possession of the editor of this work, are noted at the foot of the page.
TO WHICH IS NOW ADDED, A LETTER OF COURTSHIP TO HIS VIRTUOUS ANDAMIABLE WIDOW."Cambridge, December, 1730.
"Some time since died here Mr. Matthew Abbey, in a very advanced age: He had for a great number of years served the College in quality of Bedmaker and Sweeper: Having no child, his wife inherits his whole estate, which he bequeathed to her by his last will and testament, as follows, viz.:—
"To my dear wifeMy joy and life,I freely now do give her,My whole estate,With all my plate,Being just about to leave her.
"My tub of soap,A long cart-rope,A frying pan and kettle,An ashes[74] pail,A threshing-flail,An iron wedge and beetle.
"Two painted chairs,Nine warden pears,A large old dripping platter,This bed of hayOn which I lay,An old saucepan for butter.
"A little mug,A two-quart jug,A bottle full of brandy,A looking-glassTo see your face,You'll find it very handy.
"A musket true,As ever flew,A pound of shot and wallet,A leather sash,My calabash,My powder-horn and bullet.
"An old sword-blade,A garden spade,A hoe, a rake, a ladder,A wooden can,A close-stool pan,A clyster-pipe and bladder.
"A greasy hat,My old ram cat,A yard and half of linen,A woollen fleece,A pot of grease,[75]In order for your spinning.
"A small tooth comb,An ashen broom,A candlestick and hatchet,A coverlidStriped down with red,A bag of rags to patch it.
"A rugged mat,A tub of fat,A book put out by Bunyan,Another bookBy Robin Cook,[76]A skein or two of spun-yarn.
"An old black muff,Some garden stuff,A quantity of borage,[77]Some devil's weed,And burdock seed,To season well your porridge.
"A chafing-dish,With one salt-fish.If I am not mistaken,A leg of pork,A broken fork,And half a flitch of bacon.
"A spinning-wheel,One peck of meal,A knife without a handle,A rusty lamp,Two quarts of samp,And half a tallow candle.
"My pouch and pipes,Two oxen tripes,An oaken dish well carved,My little dog,And spotted hog,With two young pigs just starved.
"This is my store,I have no more,I heartily do give it:My years are spun,My days are done,And so I think to leave it.
"Thus Father Abbey left his spouse,As rich as church or college mouse,Which is sufficient invitationTo serve the college in his station."Newhaven, January2, 1731.
"Our sweeper having lately buried his spouse, and accidentally hearing of the death and will of his deceased Cambridge brother, has conceived a violent passion for the relict. As love softens the mind and disposes to poetry, he has eased himself in the following strains, which he transmits to the charming widow, as the first essay of his love and courtship.
"MISTRESS AbbeyTo you I fly,You only can relieve me;To you I turn,For you I burn,If you will but believe me.
"Then, gentle dame,Admit my flame,And grant me my petition;If you deny,Alas! I dieIn pitiful condition.
"Before the newsOf your dear spouseHad reached us at New Haven,My dear wife dy'd,Who was my brideIn anno eighty-seven.
"Thus[78] being free,Let's both agreeTo join our hands, for I doBoldly averA widowerIs fittest for a widow.
"You may be sure'T is not your dowerI make this flowing verse on;In these smooth laysI only praiseThe glories[79] of your person.
"For the whole thatWas left by[80]Mat.Fortune to me has grantedIn equal store,I've[81] one thing moreWhich Matthew long had wanted.
"No teeth, 't is true,You have to shew,The young think teeth inviting;But silly youths!I love those mouths[82]Where there's no fear of biting.
"A leaky eye,That's never dry,These woful times is fitting.A wrinkled faceAdds solemn graceTo folks devout at meeting.
"[A furrowed brow,Where corn might grow,Such fertile soil is seen in 't,A long hook nose,Though scorned by foes,For spectacles convenient.][83]
"Thus to go onI would[84] put downYour charms from head to foot,Set all your gloryIn verse before ye,But I've no mind to do 't.[85]
"Then haste away,And make no stay;For soon as you come hither,We'll eat and sleep,Make beds and sweep.And talk and smoke together.
"But if, my dear,I must move there,Tow'rds Cambridge straight I'll set me.[86]To touse the hayOn which you lay,If age and you will let me."[87]
The authorship of Father Abbey's Will and the Letter of Courtship is ascribed to the Rev. John Seccombe, who graduated at Harvard College in the year 1728. The former production was sent to England through the hands of Governor Belcher, and in May, 1732, appeared both in the Gentleman's Magazine and the London Magazine. The latter was also despatched to England, and was printed in the Gentleman's Magazine for June, and in the London Magazine for August, 1732. Both were republished in the Massachusetts Magazine, November, 1794. A most entertaining account of the author of these poems, and of those to whom they relate, may be found in the "Historical and Biographical Notes" of the pamphlet to which allusion has been already made, and in the "Cambridge [Mass.] Chronicle" of April 28, 1855.
WINE. To drink wine.
After "wining" to a certain extent, we sallied forth from his rooms.—Alma Mater, Vol. I. p. 14.
Hither they repair each day after dinner "to wine."
Ibid., Vol. I. p. 95.
After dinner I had the honor ofwiningwith no less a personage than a fellow of the college.—Ibid., Vol. I. p. 114.
Inwiningwith a fair one opposite, a luckless piece of jelly adhered to the tip of his still more luckless nose.—The Blank Book of a Small-Colleger, New York, 1824, p. 75.
WINE PARTY. Among students at the University of Cambridge, Eng., an entertainment after dinner, which is thus described by Bristed: "Many assemble atwine partiesto chat over a frugal dessert of oranges, biscuits, and cake, and sip a few glasses of not remarkably good wine. These wine parties are the most common entertainments, being rather the cheapest and very much the most convenient, for the preparations required for them are so slight as not to disturb the studies of the hardest reading man, and they take place at a time when no one pretends to do any work."—Five Years in an Eng. Univ., Ed. 2d, p. 21.
WIRE. At Harvard College, a trick; an artifice; a stratagem; adodge.
WIRY. Trickish; artful.
WITENAGEMOTE. Saxon,witan, to know, andgemot, a meeting, a council.
In the University of Oxford, the weekly meeting of the heads of the colleges.—Oxford Guide.
WOODEN SPOON. In the University of Cambridge, Eng., the scholar whose name stands last of all on the printed list of honors, at the Bachelors' Commencement in January, is scoffingly said to gain thewooden spoon. He is also very currently himself called thewooden spoon.
A young academic coming into the country immediately after this great competition, in which he had conspicuously distinguished himself, was asked by a plain country gentleman, "Pray, Sir, is my Jack a Wrangler?" "No, Sir." Now Jack had confidently pledged himself to his uncle that he would take his degree with honor. "A Senior Optime?" "No, Sir." "Why, what was he then?" "Wooden Spoon!" "Best suited to his wooden head," said the mortified inquirer.—Forby's Vocabulary, Vol. II. p. 258.
It may not perhaps be improper to mention one very remarkable personage, I mean "theWooden Spoon." This luckless wight (for what cause I know not) is annually the universal butt and laughing-stock of the whole Senate-House. He is the last of those young men who take honors, in his year, and is called a Junior Optime; yet, notwithstanding his being in fact superior to them all, the very lowest of the [Greek: oi polloi], or gregarious undistinguished bachelors, think themselves entitled to shoot the pointless arrows of their clumsy wit against thewooden spoon; and to reiterate the stale and perennial remark, that "Wranglers are born with gold spoons in their mouths, Senior Optimes with silver, Junior Optimes withwooden, and the [Greek: oi polloi] with leaden ones."—Gent. Mag., 1795, p. 19.
Who while he lives must wield the boasted prize,Whose value all can feel, the weak, the wise;Displays in triumph his distinguished boon,The solid honors of thewooden spoon.Grad. ad Cantab., p. 119.
2. At Yale College, this title is conferred on the student who takes the last appointment at the Junior Exhibition. The following account of the ceremonies incident to the presentation of the Wooden Spoon has been kindly furnished by a graduate of that institution.
"At Yale College the honors, or, as they are there termed, appointments, are given to a class twice during the course;—upon the merits of the two preceding years, at the end of the first term, Junior; and at the end of the second term, Senior, upon the merits of the whole college course. There are about eight grades of appointments, the lowest of which is the Third Colloquy. Each grade has its own standard, and if a number of students have attained to the same degree, they receive the same appointment. It is rarely the case, however, that more than one student can claim the distinction of a third colloquy; but when there are several, they draw lots to see which is entitled to be considered properlythethird colloquy man.
"After the Junior appointments are awarded, the members of the Junior Class hold an exhibition similar to the regular Junior exhibition, and present awooden spoonto the man who received the lowest honor in the gift of the Faculty.
"The exhibition takes place in the evening, at some public hall in town. Except to those engaged in the arrangements, nothing is known about it among the students at large, until the evening of the performances, when notices of the hour and place are quietly circulated at prayers, in order that it may not reach the ears of the Faculty, who are ever too ready to participate in the sports of the students, and to make the result tell unfavorably against the college welfare of the more prominent characters.
"As the appointed hour approaches, long files of black coats may be seen emerging from the dark halls, and winding their way through the classic elms towards the Temple, the favorite scene of students' exhibitions and secret festivals. When they reach the door, each man must undergo the searching scrutiny of the door-keeper, usually disguised as an Indian, to avoid being recognized by a college officer, should one chance to be in the crowd, and no one is allowed to enter unless he is known.
"By the time the hour of the exercises has arrived, the hall is densely packed with undergraduates and professional students. The President, who is a non-appointment man, and probably the poorest scholar in the class, sits on a stage with his associate professors. Appropriate programmes, printed in the college style, are scattered throughout the house. As the hour strikes, the President arises with becoming dignity, and, instead of the usual phrase, 'Musicam audeamus,' restores order among the audience by 'Silentiam audeamus,' and then addresses the band, 'Musica cantetur.'
"Then follow a series of burlesque orations, dissertations, and disputes, upon scientific and other subjects, from the wittiest and cleverest men in the class, and the house is kept in a continual roar of laughter. The highest appointment men frequently take part in the speeches. From time to time the band play, and the College choir sing pieces composed for the occasion. In one of the best, called AUDACIA, composed in imitation of the Crambambuli song, by a member of the class to which the writer belonged, the Wooden Spoon is referred to in the following stanza:—
'But do not think our life is aimless;O no! we crave one blessed boon,It is the prize of value nameless,The honored, classic WOODEN SPOON;But give us this, we'll shout Hurrah!O nothing like Audacia!'
"After the speeches are concluded and the music has ceased, the President rises and calls the name of the hero of the evening, who ascends the stage and stands before the high dignitary. The President then congratulates him upon having attained to so eminent a position, and speaks of the pride that he and his associates feel in conferring upon him the highest honor in their gift,—the Wooden Spoon. He exhorts him to pursue through life the noble cruise he has commenced in College,—not seeking glory as one of the illiterate,—the [Greek: oi polloi],—nor exactly on the fence, but so near to it that he may safely be said to have gained the 'happy medium.'