Chapter 23

The High-German, Master of the Waxwork,Hath an Unicorn’s Horn that was found in the Deserts of Arabia, the Powder whereof does several wonderful Cures, whereof I was advised by several Doctors to Publish the same in Print; the Cures that it has done are as follow:I have in my Travels, by the Virtues of this Powder, saved the Lives of several Gentlewomen in Child-Bed, which could not be Delivered before they took the Powder.About October the Fifth, 1702, I was in the Town of Hampton, in the County of Gloucester, at Mr Gardners, at the Sign of the White-Hart, where I heard that one Mrs Webb was in Child-Bed and could not be Delivered, so that Doctor Farr of the said Town, the Midwife and all Women left her off for Dead, upon which I sent my Landlady with a little of this Powder, the Quantity whereof would lie upon a Six-pence, which the Gentlewoman took, and was Delivered in less than a Quarter of an Hour; Doctor Farr has given it under his Hand, and some other Gentlemen of the Town can testify, that this Powder was the saving of her Life (under God).Likewise this Powder is a certain Cure for the Kings-Evil, when it breaks and runs: The Powder must be put on a Linnen Cloath and applied to the Place, and take as much as will lie on a Six-pence for two Mornings in warm Ale.The College of Physitians in London, hearing of this Powder, they came to my Lodging, on purpose to see this Horn, and desired me to let them have some Experience to try if it would Expel Poyson, upon which they sent for two Dogs and Poysoned them both, and asked me if I could save one of them, whereupon I took a little Powder of this Horn in a Spoonful of Milk, and gave it to one of them, that which I gave it to was saved, and the other died in their Presence, after which the Doctors offered me a great Sum of Money for this Horn, which I was not willing to part with.If there are any Gentlewomen desirous to Buy any of this Powder, I Sell it at Reasonable Rates, and it may be kept Ten Years and not lose its Virtue.Finis.

The High-German, Master of the Waxwork,

Hath an Unicorn’s Horn that was found in the Deserts of Arabia, the Powder whereof does several wonderful Cures, whereof I was advised by several Doctors to Publish the same in Print; the Cures that it has done are as follow:

I have in my Travels, by the Virtues of this Powder, saved the Lives of several Gentlewomen in Child-Bed, which could not be Delivered before they took the Powder.

About October the Fifth, 1702, I was in the Town of Hampton, in the County of Gloucester, at Mr Gardners, at the Sign of the White-Hart, where I heard that one Mrs Webb was in Child-Bed and could not be Delivered, so that Doctor Farr of the said Town, the Midwife and all Women left her off for Dead, upon which I sent my Landlady with a little of this Powder, the Quantity whereof would lie upon a Six-pence, which the Gentlewoman took, and was Delivered in less than a Quarter of an Hour; Doctor Farr has given it under his Hand, and some other Gentlemen of the Town can testify, that this Powder was the saving of her Life (under God).

Likewise this Powder is a certain Cure for the Kings-Evil, when it breaks and runs: The Powder must be put on a Linnen Cloath and applied to the Place, and take as much as will lie on a Six-pence for two Mornings in warm Ale.

The College of Physitians in London, hearing of this Powder, they came to my Lodging, on purpose to see this Horn, and desired me to let them have some Experience to try if it would Expel Poyson, upon which they sent for two Dogs and Poysoned them both, and asked me if I could save one of them, whereupon I took a little Powder of this Horn in a Spoonful of Milk, and gave it to one of them, that which I gave it to was saved, and the other died in their Presence, after which the Doctors offered me a great Sum of Money for this Horn, which I was not willing to part with.

If there are any Gentlewomen desirous to Buy any of this Powder, I Sell it at Reasonable Rates, and it may be kept Ten Years and not lose its Virtue.

Finis.

In Queen Anne’s time, and during the first years of the Hanoverian succession, quackery does not seem to have impaired its professors’ positions in society, providing they had other claims to consideration, and even the most impudent impostors obtained rank and celebrity under circumstances which hardly seem possible. Listen to the following: “Sir William Read, originally a tailor or a cobbler, became progressively a mountebank and a quack doctor, and gained, in his case, the equivocal honour of knighthood from Queen Anne. He is said to have practised by ‘the light of nature:’ and though he could not read, he could ride in his own chariot, and treat his company with good punch out of a golden bowl. He had an uncommon share of impudence;a few scraps of Latin in his bills made the ignorant suppose him to be wonderfully learned. He did not seek his reputation in small places, but practised at that high seat of learning, Oxford; and in one of his addresses he called upon the Vice-Chancellor, University, and the City, to vouch for his cures—as, indeed, he did upon the people of the three kingdoms. Blindness vanished before him, and he even deigned to practise in other distempers; but he defied all competition as an oculist. Queen Anne and George I. honoured Read with the care of their eyes; from which one would have thought the rulers, like the ruled, as dark intellectually as Taylor’s (his brother quack) coach-horses were corporeally, of which it was said five were blind in consequence of their master having exercised his skill upon them.” Dr Radcliffe mentions this humbug as “Read the mountebank, who has assurance enough to come to our table up-stairs at Garraway’s, swears he’ll stake his coach and six horses, his two blacks, and as many silver trumpets, against a dinner at Pontack’s.” Read died at Rochester, May 24, 1715. After Queen Anne had knighted him and Dr Hannes, the following lines werepublished:—

The Queen, like Heav’n, shines equally on all,Her favours now without distinction fall:Great Read and slender Hannes, both knighted, showThat none their honours shall to merit owe.That Popish doctrine is exploded quite,Or Ralph had been no duke and Read no knight.That none may virtue or their learning plead,This has no grace and that can hardly read.

The Ralph referred to here is the first Duke of Montague, a title that has already appeared conspicuously in these pages. In the matter of the bestowal of titles, especially knighthoods and baronetcies, we have no particular reason to congratulate ourselves now, but we have certainly improved since the days when rank was sold or bestowed upon the most audacious adventurers. So far as merit is concerned,we are, however, much in the same position as we were in the days of Read and Ralph; but ability always was an unmarketable commodity, and now it seems to secure its unhappy possessors the decided enmity of those more favoured beings whose dependence is upon patronage, and not upon personal powers, and who, in humble imitation of the fox of fable, affect to despise any such common thing as cleverness. And unfortunately this observation has a far wider bearing than on the mere bestowal of titles. It refers to things generally, and to the means by which many clever men are deprived of their subsistence, and driven to the wall by the nepotism and friendly feeling so often exercised in favour of the most arrant impostors, or on behalf of those who are just clever enough to conceal their ignorance and inability, to rob others of their ideas, or to foist second-hand notions upon a credulous and misjudging public.

In “A Journey through England,” published in 1723, we get the following picture of a travelling quack of that time: “I cannot leave Winchester without telling you of a pleasant incident that happened there. As I was sitting at the George Inn, I saw a coach with six bay horses, a calash and four, a chaise and four, enter the inn, in a yellow livery turned up with red; four gentlemen on horseback, in blue trimmed with silver; and as yellow is the colour given by the dukes in England, I went out to see what duke it was; but there was no coronet on the coach, only a plain coat-of-arms on each with this motto ‘Argento laborat Faber.’ Upon inquiry I found this great equipage belonged to a mountebank, and his name being Smith, the motto was a pun upon his name. The footmen in yellow were his tumblers and trumpeters, and those in blue his merry-andrew, his apothecary and spokesman. He was dressed in black velvet, and had in his coach a woman that danced on the ropes. He cures all diseases and sells his packets for sixpence apiece. He erected stages in all the market towns twenty miles round; and it is a prodigy how so wise apeople as the English are gulled by such pickpockets. But his amusements on the stage are worth the sixpence without the pills. In the morning he is dressed up in a fine brochade nightgown, for his chamber practice, when he gives advice and gets larger fees.”

Although the papers of the early eighteenth century actually teem with the advertisements of quacksalvers, few of the applications to the unwary possess any distinctive features, and those which do are of the grossest possible description. In theDaily Postof July 14, 1736, there is a curious testimonial to the abilities of a City practitioner who advertised very considerably about that period. His advertisements all take the form of recommendations from those who have received benefit at his hands and from his medicines, and the one we have chosen will give a fair idea of the others, which in many cases refer to the disorders of the gentlersex:—

THESEare to certify, that I Richard Sandford, Waterman, dwelling in Horsely-down-street, near the Dipping Pond, have a Son, who for a considerable Time was troubled with aPain in his Stomach, a Sleepiness and Giddiness, whereupon I calling to Mind that some Years since my Wife’s Mother, betwixt 60 and 70 years of Age,afflicted with a Palsy or Hemeplegia, or loss of the Use of one Side of her Body, had been cured byMr.JOHN MOORE,Apothecary,At the Pestle and Mortar in Laurence-Pountney’s Lane, the first Great Gates on the Left-Hand from Cannon-street,I applied to him for Relief of my Son, who after having taken a few of his Worm-Powders, they brought from him a WORM (or INSECT) like a Hog-Louse, with Legs and hairy, or a Kind of Down all over it, and very probably more, but he going to a common Vault they were lost; upon which he is amended as to his former Illnesses, and I desire this may be printed for the Good of others.WitnessRichard Sandford.Oct. 6, 1735.N.B. The saidJohn Moore’sWorm Medicines and Green-Sickness Powder, are sold at Mrs. Reader’s at the Nine Sugar-Loaves, a Chandler’s Shop in Hungerford-Market, sealed with his Coat ofArms, being a Cross, with the Words,John Moore’s Worm-Powders, &c., inscribed round it: And if any are Sold at any place, except at his own House, without that Seal and Inscription, they are Counterfeits.He sells Byfield’s Sal Volatile Oliosum, at 6d. per Ounce.To be had at the said J. Moore’s,COLUMBARIUM; or, The Pigeon-House: Being an Introduction to a Natural History of Tame Pigeons, giving an Account of the several Species known in England, with the Method of breeding them, their Distempers and Cures.The two chief Advantages, which a real Acquaintance with Nature brings to our Minds, are first, by instructing our Understandings and gratifying our Curiosities; and next by exciting and cherishing our Devotion.Boyle’s Experimental Philosophy, p. 3.

Mr.JOHN MOORE,Apothecary,

At the Pestle and Mortar in Laurence-Pountney’s Lane, the first Great Gates on the Left-Hand from Cannon-street,

I applied to him for Relief of my Son, who after having taken a few of his Worm-Powders, they brought from him a WORM (or INSECT) like a Hog-Louse, with Legs and hairy, or a Kind of Down all over it, and very probably more, but he going to a common Vault they were lost; upon which he is amended as to his former Illnesses, and I desire this may be printed for the Good of others.

Witness

Richard Sandford.

Oct. 6, 1735.

N.B. The saidJohn Moore’sWorm Medicines and Green-Sickness Powder, are sold at Mrs. Reader’s at the Nine Sugar-Loaves, a Chandler’s Shop in Hungerford-Market, sealed with his Coat ofArms, being a Cross, with the Words,John Moore’s Worm-Powders, &c., inscribed round it: And if any are Sold at any place, except at his own House, without that Seal and Inscription, they are Counterfeits.

He sells Byfield’s Sal Volatile Oliosum, at 6d. per Ounce.To be had at the said J. Moore’s,

COLUMBARIUM; or, The Pigeon-House: Being an Introduction to a Natural History of Tame Pigeons, giving an Account of the several Species known in England, with the Method of breeding them, their Distempers and Cures.

The two chief Advantages, which a real Acquaintance with Nature brings to our Minds, are first, by instructing our Understandings and gratifying our Curiosities; and next by exciting and cherishing our Devotion.Boyle’s Experimental Philosophy, p. 3.

Mr Sandford’s ideas on natural history were rather confused, and his powers of description evidently bothered by the astonishing “insect” which had so annoyed his son. What a pity so curious a specimen was not preserved for the benefit of Moore and “the good of others”! There was now a sore battle being fought between the quacks and the regular practitioners, the latter being bound to come forward and defend what they considered to be their rights by all and every means. That they did not disdain the use of advertisements, the following, which had its origin in a small gossiping paragraph, shows. It appears in theDaily Journalof July 22, 1734, but was originally published a few days before, without the two paragraphs aftersignature:—

WHEREASin the Papers of Saturday last there was a Paragraph relating to a Dispute that happened at Child’s Coffee-house, between a Doctor and a Surgeon; I think it my Duty to tell the Fact that occasioned this Dispute, truly as it is.On Wednesday the 10th of July I sent to Mr. Nourse; when he came I told him I had a Swelling and great Pain in my Leg; he saw it, said it was much inflamed, and that I must be blooded, take some Physick, and that he would send something that was proper to be applied; I was immediately let Blood; and he writ a Purge for me, to be taken the next Day, which I took, and am thereby, I thank God, much better. Afterwards, in the same Conversation, he ask’d me how long I had been ill? my Answer was, ten Days; he reply’d, have youbeen ill so long, and had no Advice? I then told him, I had, some Days before, been to the Jew Doctor’s House; his Answer was, I suppose you mean Dr. Schamberg, and pray what has he ordered for you? I said, I could not tell; but being desirous that Dr. Nourse should see the Prescription, I sent to the Apothecary’s for it by my Son, who brought it directly into the Room, where there was not anybody but Mr. Nourse and myself; Mr. Nourse looked upon the Bill, and told me I must take none of these Things now; nor the Spaw Water, said I? (for that was Part of the Prescription); his Answer was No, and laid the Bill down upon the Table, without saying anything more. This is the whole Truth, and I’m ready to attest it by an Affidavit.N.B. When I sent to Mr. Nourse I was determined to apply no more to Dr. Schamberg, he being in a manner a Stranger to me, and I have been much worse every Day, from the Time I began to take his Medicines.B. J. Knight.Leadenhall Market, 15 July.The Propriety of Æsculapius’s Prescription judge of by the Effect.Q. Whether Steel steep’d in Brandy, and Spa Water, are proper for a Shortness of Breath, or an Inflammation.

On Wednesday the 10th of July I sent to Mr. Nourse; when he came I told him I had a Swelling and great Pain in my Leg; he saw it, said it was much inflamed, and that I must be blooded, take some Physick, and that he would send something that was proper to be applied; I was immediately let Blood; and he writ a Purge for me, to be taken the next Day, which I took, and am thereby, I thank God, much better. Afterwards, in the same Conversation, he ask’d me how long I had been ill? my Answer was, ten Days; he reply’d, have youbeen ill so long, and had no Advice? I then told him, I had, some Days before, been to the Jew Doctor’s House; his Answer was, I suppose you mean Dr. Schamberg, and pray what has he ordered for you? I said, I could not tell; but being desirous that Dr. Nourse should see the Prescription, I sent to the Apothecary’s for it by my Son, who brought it directly into the Room, where there was not anybody but Mr. Nourse and myself; Mr. Nourse looked upon the Bill, and told me I must take none of these Things now; nor the Spaw Water, said I? (for that was Part of the Prescription); his Answer was No, and laid the Bill down upon the Table, without saying anything more. This is the whole Truth, and I’m ready to attest it by an Affidavit.

N.B. When I sent to Mr. Nourse I was determined to apply no more to Dr. Schamberg, he being in a manner a Stranger to me, and I have been much worse every Day, from the Time I began to take his Medicines.B. J. Knight.

Leadenhall Market, 15 July.

The Propriety of Æsculapius’s Prescription judge of by the Effect.

Q. Whether Steel steep’d in Brandy, and Spa Water, are proper for a Shortness of Breath, or an Inflammation.

After this had been published once or twice, the advertiser, who could hardly have taken so much trouble out of pure gratitude, inserted another notice in the form of an affidavit, containing the foregoing and other particulars, the most important of which is that which discovers her sex. At least we presume that Bridget was a woman’s name in 1734. The difficulties between the doctors and apothecaries—the latter, when not quacks themselves, being their special agents—and the demand made for the far-famed Jesuits’ Bark, are both shown in the following handbill, which is of about the same date as theforegoing:—

WHEREASit has been of late the Endeavour of several Members of the Physicians College, to reform the Abuses of the Apothecaries, as well in the Prizes as in the Composition of their Medicines, This is to give Notice for the public Good, that a superfine Sort ofJesuits Barkready powder’d and paper’d into Doses, with or without Directions for the Use of it, is to be had at Dr. Charles Goodal’s at the Coach and Horses, in Physician’s Colledge in Warwick Lane, at 4s. per Ounce, or for a Quantity together at £3 per Pound; for the Reasonableness of which Prizes, (considering the Loss and Trouble inpowdering) we appeal to all the Druggists and Apothecaries themselves in Town, and particularly to Mr. Thair, Druggist in Newgate Street, to whom we paid full 9s. per Pound for a considerable Quantity for the Use of our self and our friends.And for the Excellency and Efficacy of this particular Bark enquire of Dr. Morton in Grey Friars.I am to be spoken with at Prayers atS. Sepulchre’s every Day,but the Lord’s Day, at Seven in the Morning, and at Home from Eight in the Morning till Ten at Night.The Poor may have Advice(that is, Nothing)forNothing.

And for the Excellency and Efficacy of this particular Bark enquire of Dr. Morton in Grey Friars.

I am to be spoken with at Prayers atS. Sepulchre’s every Day,but the Lord’s Day, at Seven in the Morning, and at Home from Eight in the Morning till Ten at Night.

The Poor may have Advice(that is, Nothing)forNothing.

“Nothing for nothing” is a rate of exchange which is current even to this day, and was very likely known long before the time of this physician, whose effort could hardly have been expected to prove disastrous to the empirics, as he, among other peculiarities, regards what should have been his strong point of dissimilarity from them as “nothing.” Another bill of the same period is noticeable for the explicitness of the address given init:—

When you are inBaldwin’s Gardens, that you may not mistake, ask forLeopard’s Court, and there at the Sign of theMoon and Stars, you will find theLouvain Doctorfrom 8 in the Morning till 7 at Night. As you pass by the end of Leopard’s Court you may see the Sign of theMoon and Stars, which, pray, observe, least you mistake: for there are several Pretenders, therefore keep this bill.Baldwin’s Gardensare nearHolborn.

Baldwin’s Gardens would hardly be a good address in these times for even the veriest quack. It is now about the foulest specimen extant of that kind of backslum or alley where, a generation back, according to Hood, pigs and Irish were wont to rally. The pigs, except in the form of hocks, “Jerry Lynch” heads, and other portions of bacon, have been removed by Act of Parliament since the poet sang his simple lay of “The Lost Child,” but the Irish have increased and multiplied with an activity unknown to them in other pursuits. The powers of the finest peasantry in the world are undoubted in one particular of philoprogenitiveness under any circumstances, and they seem toexert them to the utmost when least required and most inconvenient—when they are “pigged up” in small rooms and festering courts, and when every fresh birth is an outrage upon the sanatory laws supposed to govern us, and upon their own sense of decency. We are in the habit of hearing most of our domestic and civic misfortunes ascribed to the higher wages and increased leisure of the labouring classes of the present, as compared with those of twenty or thirty years back. Is this the case with regard to the rapid development of inhabitants for Baldwin’s Gardens, Leather Lane, Saffron Hill, and neighbouring purlieus? There may be increased leisure there, but if the wages are higher now than they were, in proportion to the higher price of provisions, they must have suffered worse than starvation in years gone by. So unhealthily crowded—in fact, pestilent—is the neighbourhood we have mentioned, that no number of quacks could have done more to shorten life than the inhabitants now do for themselves. But even these poor wretches are made the groundwork for a new system of quackery—the quackery of the mock philanthropist, who builds model lodging-houses, ostensibly and with much flourishing of trumpets, for the very poor, and then lets them to people who never did dwell in rookeries; to those people who can afford to pay good rents, and so keep up the dividends which are the modern reward of so-called charity.

Notwithstanding the many stirring events of the early part of the last century, there is little or nothing to read in any of the papers. This may be accounted for by the difficulty of obtaining news from distant or even from any parts a hundred and thirty years or so back; but whatever the reason, this is certain, the advertisements are by far the best reading in the journals, daily or weekly. Though the newspapers were to our notions wonderfully small, their editors seem to have had the greatest difficulty in filling the little space they had at command with news, and provincialjournals were sometimes put to strange shifts, even the now common work of the liner, that of inventing facts, being then unknown. It is by no means unusual to find a chapter of the Bible put in to fill up the columns; and even as late as 1740 theLondon and County Journalgratified its readers with the History of the Old and New Testaments, while other papers filled up their front pages with occasional extracts from the histories of England and other countries, or selections from books of travel. Singular as this may seem, it is true. Its truth is perhaps the most singular thing about it.

Among the many specifics of the last century was snuff, which in various forms is advertised as possessing the power not only of curing all bodily but many mental evils. In theGeneral Advertiserfor June 21, 1749, there is an advertisement of a snuff which was supposed to cure lunacy. Certainly it has an effect on the ideas with regard to the construction of sentences, as the proprietor himselfshows:—

GENTLEMEN,ONCEmore I desire you to remember, I have published myImperial Snuff, for all Disorders in the Head; and I think I might have gone further, and said, for all Disorders of Body and Mind. It hath set a great many to rights that was never expected, but there is but few, or none, that careth to have it published they were a little out of their Senses, although it be really an Ailment that none can help; but there is present Relief, if not a Cure; but I hope both, as by God’s Assistance it hath been performed already on many. And I think it my Duty to let the World know it, that they may not bear so many miserable Ailments that is capable of curing. I hear it is reported abroad I am dead, and that the World is imposed on; but, thank God, I am alive and put my Dependance on him, that he will give me leave to do some more Service before I go hence. But suppose I was dead, my Snuff is alive, and I hope it will live after I am dead, as it is capable of keeping the World in sprightly Life and Health, which must be allowed to be the greatest Blessing in the World. But what is Riches without that? And what would some have given for some of these Reliefs before it was advertised. But you are all heartily welcome at this Price of Sixpence,at present, but I should be glad of more from the Rich. I do assure you it is sold at this Price in regard to the Poor only.I am yours, etc.Samuel Major.In Swedland Court, against the end of Half-Moon-Alley, Bishopsgate Street.

GENTLEMEN,

ONCEmore I desire you to remember, I have published myImperial Snuff, for all Disorders in the Head; and I think I might have gone further, and said, for all Disorders of Body and Mind. It hath set a great many to rights that was never expected, but there is but few, or none, that careth to have it published they were a little out of their Senses, although it be really an Ailment that none can help; but there is present Relief, if not a Cure; but I hope both, as by God’s Assistance it hath been performed already on many. And I think it my Duty to let the World know it, that they may not bear so many miserable Ailments that is capable of curing. I hear it is reported abroad I am dead, and that the World is imposed on; but, thank God, I am alive and put my Dependance on him, that he will give me leave to do some more Service before I go hence. But suppose I was dead, my Snuff is alive, and I hope it will live after I am dead, as it is capable of keeping the World in sprightly Life and Health, which must be allowed to be the greatest Blessing in the World. But what is Riches without that? And what would some have given for some of these Reliefs before it was advertised. But you are all heartily welcome at this Price of Sixpence,at present, but I should be glad of more from the Rich. I do assure you it is sold at this Price in regard to the Poor only.

I am yours, etc.Samuel Major.

In Swedland Court, against the end of Half-Moon-Alley, Bishopsgate Street.

The next gentleman upon the list is Mr Patence, who combined in himself many valuable qualifications, and was according to his own showing a decided benefactor to humanity. In December 1771 we find the following in theGazetteer:—

MRPatence, Dentist and Dancing Master, No. 8, Bolt Court, Fleet Street, whose Ingenuity in making artificial Teeth, and fixing them without the least Pain, can be attested by several of the Nobility, and hopes to be honoured by the rest of the Great—may depend his Study shall be devoted to the good of every Individual. His whole Sets, with a Fine enamel on, is a Proof of his excelling all Operators. He charges ten Guineas for a whole, five for an upper or under Set, and half-a-Guinea for a single Tooth.—His Rose Powder for preserving the Teeth, is worthy to grace and perfume the chamber of a Prince.—His Medicines for preventing all Infections and sore Throats have been experienced by several.—As for dancing, he leaves that to the multitude of Ladies and Gentlemen whom he has taught, and desires to be rewarded no more than his Merit deserves, nor no less. Public School nights, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday Evenings; Tuesday Evenings set apart for Cotillons only.—N.B.His Rose Dentrifice may be had at Mr Nesbit’s Toy Shop Bishopsgate Street, and at his House, at 2s. 6d. the box.

The conjunction of practices seems somewhat odd, and, as many may think, rather ominous—for the patients. But Mr Patence evidently flourished, and found plenty money to spend in advertisements. He promises much, but his strong point is secrecy. Advice is as usual offered gratis, which was a fair charge for it, considering that the applicant was sure to be advised to buy some of the nostrums purveyed by Patence. By his skill he repeatedly offers to stand or fall, and about the date we have given he publishes the following as evidence of it. It will be noticed that theaddress has been shifted, possibly on account of increasedbusiness:—

No. 3Ludgate Hill.THISWeek a Lady applied to Mr.Patence, No. 3 Ludgate Hill, who had her Jaw-Bone broke by having a Tooth extracted, by another Lady, with a sound front Tooth in her Hand, and two others just ready to drop from their Sockets, by having four wretched artificial ones set in by another: her Teeth are all loose. By Tincture, a Gentleman with Teeth set in as brown as a Walnut, that never answered any End; and several other Persons in different Cases. Mr.Patencetherefore begs leave to add, that it is not his Intent to take away or lessen the Merit of any one particular Person; but how shocking it is to see Ladies and Gentlemen imposed on, a good set of Teeth ruined, and left at Leisure to lament the Loss in Pain, by Pretenders; for, of all Things artificial Teeth badly set in, is the most destructive of the good next them: but if performed in that masterly Manner that human Nature requires, they are a Preservation, and will answer the End which a humane Man would wish for, or a skilful Dentist desire.—Advice given daily in Cases ordinary, and extraordinary. No Cure no Pay.

No. 3Ludgate Hill.

THISWeek a Lady applied to Mr.Patence, No. 3 Ludgate Hill, who had her Jaw-Bone broke by having a Tooth extracted, by another Lady, with a sound front Tooth in her Hand, and two others just ready to drop from their Sockets, by having four wretched artificial ones set in by another: her Teeth are all loose. By Tincture, a Gentleman with Teeth set in as brown as a Walnut, that never answered any End; and several other Persons in different Cases. Mr.Patencetherefore begs leave to add, that it is not his Intent to take away or lessen the Merit of any one particular Person; but how shocking it is to see Ladies and Gentlemen imposed on, a good set of Teeth ruined, and left at Leisure to lament the Loss in Pain, by Pretenders; for, of all Things artificial Teeth badly set in, is the most destructive of the good next them: but if performed in that masterly Manner that human Nature requires, they are a Preservation, and will answer the End which a humane Man would wish for, or a skilful Dentist desire.—Advice given daily in Cases ordinary, and extraordinary. No Cure no Pay.

After this Patence goes on merrily telling us now that his “works, cures, and operations confirm his supremacy over every dentist in this kingdom; also physicians, curing man, woman, and child, when not one of them can give relief;” and then that he sells “teeth comprised of six different enamels, warranted never to turn black.” Teeth were, however, but small things in his practice, as he guarantees to replace “fallen noses” and challenges all known and unknown diseases, being, as he states, “mechanically accurated and anatomically perfect in the human structure.” To say less, he tells us, would be “doing an act unjust to himself, his patients, and his Maker, whose gifts are disposed of to whom he pleases.” In theMorning Postof 1775 he publishes the following, having in the meantime once again changed hisresidence:—

To theNobility,Gentry, and Others.PATENCE, Surgeon by Birth, and Dentist, having had ten Years Practice, performs every Operation on the Teeth, Gums, &c., with superior Skill, and whose Cures are not excelled or even equalled byany Dentist whatever. And as a Confirmation of the same, please to observe thefollowing:—October 5. A Gentleman who had lost all his Teeth, his Gums ulcerated and scorbutic, in five Days made a perfect Cure, fixed him in a whole set of natural Teeth, without Springs or any Fastening.October 16. A Lady whose Jaw was fractured by a Barber, her Teeth loose, her Gums ulcerated, attended with a running Matter, and an inflammation in her Cheeks, with a callous Swelling, cured without poulticing or cutting.October 20. A Lady that had lost all her upper Teeth by using Powders and Tinctures that are advertised to cure Everything, her Mouth ulcerated, and her Breath nauseous, is now delicately Clean, and replaced the Teeth with those that never change their Colour.Sunday, October 29. Perfectly relieved a Person that had lost both Palate and Speech; when he drank or eat it came out at his Nostrils, and had been in that state three Years; he had applied to Surgeons and several Hospitals, who deemed him incurable, and told him, one and all, he could have no Relief; he now speaks articulate, eats and drinks with Pleasure, which if any one should doubt, he can refer them to the Man. These, with upwards of three thousand Operations and Cures, have been accomplished by your humble Servant,M. Patence.At No. 403, in the Strand, nearSouthampton Street, London. Where the Teeth, though ever so foul, are made delicately white in six Minutes, and Medicines given for their preservation, for half a Guinea, any hour after ten in the Morning. Advice gratis, and profound Secrecy if required.☞Envy may snarl, but superior Abilities assists the Afflicted.

To theNobility,Gentry, and Others.

PATENCE, Surgeon by Birth, and Dentist, having had ten Years Practice, performs every Operation on the Teeth, Gums, &c., with superior Skill, and whose Cures are not excelled or even equalled byany Dentist whatever. And as a Confirmation of the same, please to observe thefollowing:—

October 5. A Gentleman who had lost all his Teeth, his Gums ulcerated and scorbutic, in five Days made a perfect Cure, fixed him in a whole set of natural Teeth, without Springs or any Fastening.

October 16. A Lady whose Jaw was fractured by a Barber, her Teeth loose, her Gums ulcerated, attended with a running Matter, and an inflammation in her Cheeks, with a callous Swelling, cured without poulticing or cutting.

October 20. A Lady that had lost all her upper Teeth by using Powders and Tinctures that are advertised to cure Everything, her Mouth ulcerated, and her Breath nauseous, is now delicately Clean, and replaced the Teeth with those that never change their Colour.

Sunday, October 29. Perfectly relieved a Person that had lost both Palate and Speech; when he drank or eat it came out at his Nostrils, and had been in that state three Years; he had applied to Surgeons and several Hospitals, who deemed him incurable, and told him, one and all, he could have no Relief; he now speaks articulate, eats and drinks with Pleasure, which if any one should doubt, he can refer them to the Man. These, with upwards of three thousand Operations and Cures, have been accomplished by your humble Servant,M. Patence.

At No. 403, in the Strand, nearSouthampton Street, London. Where the Teeth, though ever so foul, are made delicately white in six Minutes, and Medicines given for their preservation, for half a Guinea, any hour after ten in the Morning. Advice gratis, and profound Secrecy if required.

☞Envy may snarl, but superior Abilities assists the Afflicted.

There must be something very ambitious about a man who, not satisfied with being dentist and dancing-master, assumes the title of “surgeon by birth.” It is noticeable that though Patence was born a surgeon, he did not discover it till he had been at dentistry and dancing for someyears.[37]But in 1775 and thereabouts quacks were not very particular as to their statements. In September 1776 theMorning Postcontains a very lengthy advertisement, put forth by one Lattese, a Piedmontese,who states that he has “by a long course of experiments discovered the wonderful secret of procreating either sex at the joint option of the parents. Should their desire be to have a girl, the success cannot be warranted with absolute certainty, though the chances will be highly in favour of such an event; but should they concur in their wishes to have a son, they may rely that by strictly conforming to a few easy and natural directions, they will positively have a boy.” Mr Lattese is so satisfied with the result of his experience that he is satisfied to await the result, and, no satisfaction, no pay. However much we may have advanced in some directions since the days of Patence and Lattese—though we now have railroads, steamboats, tramways, electric telegraphs, a penny post, vote by ballot, asphalt pavement, and good-templarism—it must be admitted that we have, in grasping at mere bubbles, lost many true arts. Among those unfortunately forgotten must, we are sorry to assume, be ranked those of breeding boys at will and surgeonsà discretion.

It is curious how anxious many of the quacks are that they shall not be confounded with their rivals, and their addresses are often given with wonderful exactness. Of this we will add another example, which, though some years later than the one about Baldwin’s Gardens, is in no way less distinct. It would seem, from many references in old newspapers, that the term Maypole was used for a certain portion of the Strand long after the shaft itself had beenremoved:—

Inthe Strand, over against the Maypole, on the left Hand coming from Temple-Bar, at the Sign of the Golden Cross, between a Sword Cuttlers and a Milliner’s Shop, the Sign of the Sugar Loaf and Barber’s Pole, within four Doors of the Mitre Tavern: Where you may see a large Red coloured Lanthorn, with Eleven Candles in it; and a white Sign written upon with red Letters DUTCH DOCTOR,Licensed by his most Excellent Majesty: and a long Entry with a Hatch and a Knocker on it. Where you may come in privately, and speak with him, and need not be ashamed, he having not any in his House but himself and his Family.

The sign of the Sugar-loaf and Barber’s Pole must have been unique even in the days of signboards, when incongruity was an advantage. Signs remind us of a noted quack of last century, Van Butchell, who painted a wonderful inscription over the front of his house. He was a great advertiser, too, and his effusions are found in most of the papers. When his wife died he had her embalmed, and used to let his patients see the body. He made her very useful as a means of publicity, one of his notices—in theSt James’s Chroniclefor October 1776—runningthus:—

VANBUTCHELL (not willing to be unpleasantly circumstanced, and wishing to convince some good Minds they have been misinformed) acquaints the Curious no Stranger can see his embalmed Wife, unless (by a Friend or personally) introduced to himself, any Day between Nine and One, Sundays excepted.

Van Butchell, though he lost no opportunity of looking after the main chance, had a mad way of conducting his business, which caused people to regard him as quite out of the ordinary level of charlatans, and his eccentricities in time got him a reputation for both cleverness and conscientiousness. He lived in Mount Street, and on his house and part of the next the following strange inscription waspainted:—

BYHIS MAJESTY’SThus, said sneaking Jack,I’ll be first; if I get my Money,ROYALspeaking like himself,I don’t care who suffers.LETTERS PATENT,MARTINVAN BUTCHELL’SNEW INVENTEDWith caustic care—and old Phim.SPRING BANDSAND FASTENINGSSometimes in six days, and always in ten—the Fistula in Ano.FORTHE APPARELAND FURNITUREJuly 6.OFLicensed to deal in Perfumery, i.e.HUMAN BEINGSHydrophobia cured in thirty days.ANDBRUTE CREATURES.Made of Milk and Honey.

BYHIS MAJESTY’S

LETTERS PATENT,MARTINVAN BUTCHELL’SNEW INVENTEDWith caustic care—and old Phim.SPRING BANDSAND FASTENINGSSometimes in six days, and always in ten—the Fistula in Ano.FORTHE APPARELAND FURNITUREJuly 6.OFLicensed to deal in Perfumery, i.e.HUMAN BEINGSHydrophobia cured in thirty days.ANDBRUTE CREATURES.Made of Milk and Honey.

His next-door neighbour, however, thinking proper to rebuild part of his front, obliterated half of the notice, which, as remarked, ran across both houses. At one time Van Butchell had a famous dun horse, and having some dispute with the stable-keeper, it was detained by the latter to pay for his keep, and was at length sold at Tattersall’s, where, from the character given him by Van Butchell, he brought a good price. This affair was the occasion of a lawsuit, and caused the Doctor to add in small gold letters as quoted, nearly at the top of his notice, the words, “Thus said sneaking Jack,” &c. Of Van Butchell’s literary and advertising talents, the reader will be best able to form a conclusion after a perusal of the following specimen, taken from various newspapers at varioustimes:—

Causes of Crim. Con. Also Barreness—And the King’s Evil: Advice—new—Guinea; come from Ten till One: for I go to none. The Anatomist and Sympathizer who never poisons—nor sheds human blood: Balm is always good.Corresponding—Lads—Remember Judas:—And the year 80!Last Monday morning at Seven o’clock, Doctor Merryman,of Queen Street, Mayfair, presentedElizabeth, the wife of Martin van Butchellwith her Fifth fine Boy, at hisHouseinMount Street, Grosvenor Square, and—they—all—are—well. Post Masters General for Ten Thousand Pounds (—We mean Gentlemen’s—Not a Penny less—) I will soon construct—Such Mail-Coach—Perch Bolts, as shall never break!Tender—hearted—Man—User of the Knife,—Would’st thou cut thy Wife? (—Unlesstwo[38]were by?—Fearing she might die?—) Is—not—Blood—the Life? If the Empress of Russia—the Emperor of Germany—the King of Prussia—an Immaculate,—or the Pope of Rome—were sorely smitten—with bad Fistulæ and tormenting Piles—visited Martin to be made quite whole:—Without Confinement—Fomentation—Risk—Infection—Poultice—Caustic—or Cutting:—bringingtwo per Cent. of Five Years Profit.—☞ Lessisnothisfee. Nor would he suffer a third person to be in the room. Not wanting help,—he won’t be hinder’d; by half-willed spies; slavish informers: nor sad alarmists. All his patients live: and—Jehovah—praise.To the Editor—of a Morning Paper—Ego—Secundus.—Of God every man—hath his proper gift: glory be to him—that of mine is healing:—(Not miraculous,—nor by Satan’s aid:)—being vigilant—while gay lads gamed at the Tennis Court—I found it in schools anatomical—Fistulæ and Piles—best my genius fit—Very broad is art—narrow human wit: tho’ man was complete (—As he ought to be with an hairy chin.)—Lovely women hate fops effeminate.—Time approaches when among certain men—in another age—beards—will—be—the—rage!To many I refer—for my character: each will have the grace—to write out his case; soon as he is well—an history tell: for the public good;—so save human blood: as—all—true—folk—shou’d. Sharkish people may—keep themselves away—Those that use men ill—I never can heal; being forbidden—to cast pearls to pigs; lest—they—turn—and—tear. Wisdom makes dainty: patients come to me, with heavy guineas—between ten and one: but—I—go—to—none.Mender of mankind; in a manly way.Fistulæ—Patients—Fee—is—according—to ability! let those—who have much give—without grudging!—(heavy guineas—down: I don’t like paper;—unless—from the Bank of good Old England)—Plain folk—do comply—very readily: so shall—the gaudy:—or keep their complaints! Many—are in want of food;—and raiment, for large families. Such—will be made whole—just so speedily as the most wealthy; that’s “one right of man,” and he shall have it; while God grants me health!—(Philosophers—say—Mankind—are equal:—and pure religion—kindly—promotes—good.)—Lofty ones—read this;—thenpause a little: down your dust—must lay; promises—won’t do; I can’t go away—to receive some pay from other people!BritishChristianLads. (“Behold—now is the day—of salvation.” Get understanding:—as the highest gain.—) Cease looking boyish:—become quite manly!—(Girlsare fond ofhair:—it is natural.)—Let your beards grow long: that ye may be strong:—in mind—and in body: as were great grand dads: centuries ago; when John did not owe—a single penny: more—than—he—could—pay.Phi—lo—so—fie—sirs.—“Heaven gives a will:—then directs the way.” Honor your maker:—And “Be swift to hear: slow—to—speak:—or—wrath.” Leave offdeforming:—each—himself—reform: wear—the—marks—of—men—In-con-tes-ti-ble! Jesus—did not shave:—for He—knew better. Had it been proper—our chins should be bare, would hair—be put there:—by wise Jehovah?—Who—made—all—things—good.Sympathising—Minds!—“Blessed are they that consider the poor.” Princes—Dukes—Lords—Knights—Esquires—Ladies—“Or the Lord knows who,” are hapless mortals!—Many do need me—to give them comfort! Am not I—the first—healer—(at this Day)—of bad Fistulæ?—(with—an handsome Beard)—like Hippocrates! The combing—I sell—one guinea—each hair:—(of use—to the Fair, that want fine children:—I can—tell them how;—it—is a secret—) Some—are quite—auburn;—others—silver white:—full—half quarter—long, growing—(day and night)—only—fifteen—months! Ye must hither come,—(As I go to none)—and bring—one per cent. of five years’ profit:—that’s my settled fee; it—shall be return’d if I do not cure—(in a little time)—the worst Fistulæ: let who will—have failed! Lie telling—is bad:—sotting—makes folk sad! see—(Ananias)—Beginning Acts v. Pot-I-cary—bow—thy—frizz’d—mealy pate! “Despisers,—behold—wonder—and perish!” “God—gives grace to man! Glory—be to God! He—doth all things well!”Fistulæ—and—Piles, bythehelpofGod—weeradicate,Havingwitenoughtohealthosecomplaints, mysmallfeemustbe—twelveheavyguineas: largesixscorethousand: Wemean2prcent.onfiveyearsprofit—putitinrouleausofanhundredeach.—Comefromtentillone:—for—I—go—to—none.

Corresponding—Lads—Remember Judas:—And the year 80!Last Monday morning at Seven o’clock, Doctor Merryman,of Queen Street, Mayfair, presentedElizabeth, the wife of Martin van Butchellwith her Fifth fine Boy, at hisHouseinMount Street, Grosvenor Square, and—they—all—are—well. Post Masters General for Ten Thousand Pounds (—We mean Gentlemen’s—Not a Penny less—) I will soon construct—Such Mail-Coach—Perch Bolts, as shall never break!

Tender—hearted—Man—User of the Knife,—Would’st thou cut thy Wife? (—Unlesstwo[38]were by?—Fearing she might die?—) Is—not—Blood—the Life? If the Empress of Russia—the Emperor of Germany—the King of Prussia—an Immaculate,—or the Pope of Rome—were sorely smitten—with bad Fistulæ and tormenting Piles—visited Martin to be made quite whole:—Without Confinement—Fomentation—Risk—Infection—Poultice—Caustic—or Cutting:—bringingtwo per Cent. of Five Years Profit.—☞ Lessisnothisfee. Nor would he suffer a third person to be in the room. Not wanting help,—he won’t be hinder’d; by half-willed spies; slavish informers: nor sad alarmists. All his patients live: and—Jehovah—praise.

To the Editor—of a Morning Paper—Ego—Secundus.—Of God every man—hath his proper gift: glory be to him—that of mine is healing:—(Not miraculous,—nor by Satan’s aid:)—being vigilant—while gay lads gamed at the Tennis Court—I found it in schools anatomical—Fistulæ and Piles—best my genius fit—Very broad is art—narrow human wit: tho’ man was complete (—As he ought to be with an hairy chin.)—Lovely women hate fops effeminate.—Time approaches when among certain men—in another age—beards—will—be—the—rage!

To many I refer—for my character: each will have the grace—to write out his case; soon as he is well—an history tell: for the public good;—so save human blood: as—all—true—folk—shou’d. Sharkish people may—keep themselves away—Those that use men ill—I never can heal; being forbidden—to cast pearls to pigs; lest—they—turn—and—tear. Wisdom makes dainty: patients come to me, with heavy guineas—between ten and one: but—I—go—to—none.Mender of mankind; in a manly way.

Fistulæ—Patients—Fee—is—according—to ability! let those—who have much give—without grudging!—(heavy guineas—down: I don’t like paper;—unless—from the Bank of good Old England)—Plain folk—do comply—very readily: so shall—the gaudy:—or keep their complaints! Many—are in want of food;—and raiment, for large families. Such—will be made whole—just so speedily as the most wealthy; that’s “one right of man,” and he shall have it; while God grants me health!—(Philosophers—say—Mankind—are equal:—and pure religion—kindly—promotes—good.)—Lofty ones—read this;—thenpause a little: down your dust—must lay; promises—won’t do; I can’t go away—to receive some pay from other people!

BritishChristianLads. (“Behold—now is the day—of salvation.” Get understanding:—as the highest gain.—) Cease looking boyish:—become quite manly!—(Girlsare fond ofhair:—it is natural.)—Let your beards grow long: that ye may be strong:—in mind—and in body: as were great grand dads: centuries ago; when John did not owe—a single penny: more—than—he—could—pay.

Phi—lo—so—fie—sirs.—“Heaven gives a will:—then directs the way.” Honor your maker:—And “Be swift to hear: slow—to—speak:—or—wrath.” Leave offdeforming:—each—himself—reform: wear—the—marks—of—men—In-con-tes-ti-ble! Jesus—did not shave:—for He—knew better. Had it been proper—our chins should be bare, would hair—be put there:—by wise Jehovah?—Who—made—all—things—good.

Sympathising—Minds!—“Blessed are they that consider the poor.” Princes—Dukes—Lords—Knights—Esquires—Ladies—“Or the Lord knows who,” are hapless mortals!—Many do need me—to give them comfort! Am not I—the first—healer—(at this Day)—of bad Fistulæ?—(with—an handsome Beard)—like Hippocrates! The combing—I sell—one guinea—each hair:—(of use—to the Fair, that want fine children:—I can—tell them how;—it—is a secret—) Some—are quite—auburn;—others—silver white:—full—half quarter—long, growing—(day and night)—only—fifteen—months! Ye must hither come,—(As I go to none)—and bring—one per cent. of five years’ profit:—that’s my settled fee; it—shall be return’d if I do not cure—(in a little time)—the worst Fistulæ: let who will—have failed! Lie telling—is bad:—sotting—makes folk sad! see—(Ananias)—Beginning Acts v. Pot-I-cary—bow—thy—frizz’d—mealy pate! “Despisers,—behold—wonder—and perish!” “God—gives grace to man! Glory—be to God! He—doth all things well!”

Fistulæ—and—Piles, bythehelpofGod—weeradicate,Havingwitenoughtohealthosecomplaints, mysmallfeemustbe—twelveheavyguineas: largesixscorethousand: Wemean2prcent.onfiveyearsprofit—putitinrouleausofanhundredeach.—Comefromtentillone:—for—I—go—to—none.

No one, after reading these extracts, will be inclined to doubt that Van Butchell was an original. His notoriety was such that many used to visit his house, not so much for the purpose of receiving advice as to see and converse with him. The success which he and contemporary quacks madeled to the tax on “patent medicines,” which was imposed in 1783, and has now for over ninety years been a fruitful source of revenue. Of Van Butchell’s contemporaries, one of the most worthy of note was Katerfelto, of whom Cowper speaks in “The Task”—

And Katerfelto, with his hair an endAt his own wonders, wondering for his bread.

Katerfelto was a foreigner who had “seen service,” and according to his own showing was both brave and learned. A notice of him which appears in an article on quacks says: “In a pamphlet on quackery, published at Kingston-upon-Hull, in 1805, it is stated that Dr Katerfelto practised on the people of London in the influenza of 1782; that he added to his nostrums the fascinations of hocus-pocus; and that with the services of some extraordinaryblack catshe astonished the vulgar. In 1790, or 1791, he visited the city of Durham, accompanied by his wife and daughter. His travelling equipage consisted of an old rumbling coach, drawn by a pair of sorry hacks; and his two black servants wore green liveries with red collars. They were sent round the town, blowing trumpets and delivering bills of their master’s performances. These were—in the daytime, a microscope; in the evening, electrical experiments, in which the black cats—‘the doctor’s devils’—played their parts in yielding electric sparks; tricks of legerdemain concluded the entertainments. He was a tall, thin man, dressed in a black gown and square cap; he is said to have been originally a soldier in the Prussian service. In one of his advertisements he states that he was a colonel in the ‘Death’s Head’ regiment of hussars, a terrific prognostic of his ultimate profession. He had many mishaps in his conjuring career; once he sent up a fire balloon, which, falling upon a hay-stack, set it on fire, and it was consumed, when Katerfelto was sued for its value, and was sent to prison in default of payment. And not long before hisdeath, he was committed by the Mayor of Shrewsbury to the House of Correction in that city as a vagrant and impostor. Katerfelto mixed up with his quackery some real science, and by the aid of the solar microscope astonished the world with insect wonders. In one of his advertisements in theMorning Post, of July 1782, he says that, by its aid, the insects on the hedges will be seen larger than ever, and those insects which caused the late influenza will be seen as large as a bird; and in a drop of water the size of a pin’s head there will be seen above 50,000 insects; the same in beer, milk, vinegar, blood, flour, cheese, etc., etc., and there will be seen many surprising indifferent vegetables, and above 200 other dead objects. He obtained good prices for his show:—‘The admittance to see these wonderful works of Providence is only—front seats, three shillings; second seats, two shillings; and back seats, one shilling only, from eight o’clock in the morning till six in the afternoon, at No. 22 Piccadilly.’ He fully understood the advantages of puffing, and one of his advertisements commences with a story of ‘a gentleman of the faculty belonging to Oxford University, who, finding it likely to prove a fine day, set out for London purposely to see those great wonders which are advertised so much by that famous philosopher, Mr Katerfelto;’ that the said gentleman declared, ‘if he had come three hundred miles on purpose, the knowledge he had then received would amply reward him; and that he should not wonder that some of the nobility should come from the remotest part of Scotland to hear Mr Katerfelto, as the people of that country in particular are always searching after knowledge.’ He elsewhere declares himself ‘the greatest philosopher in this kingdom since Sir Isaac Newton.’ ‘And Mr Katerfelto, as a divine and moral philosopher, begs leave to say that all persons on earth live in darkness, if they are able to see, but will not see his wonderful exhibition.’” Katerfelto, who had been in trouble both in his own country and in France, showed an aptitude for distinguishinghimself in a similar way here, not only in the ways we have already quoted, but with regard to impositions practised on the confiding. He obtained £2000 from a Captain Paterson, but had to return it. This he afterwards referred to as instance of his generosity and love of honesty, and his admiration for this country is shown by his avowed desire to stay in it, “though unpensioned, notwithstanding the many offers from the Queen of France, the request of his friend and correspondent Dr Franklin, and the positive commands of his liege lord the King of Prussia.”

Mention of the Queen of France reminds us of another impostor, perhaps the greatest in his way that ever lived, Joseph Balsamo. As, however, he had little or nothing to do with advertising, and as he has already afforded work for many able and vigorous pens, we will be content to quote a few lines from Carlyle regarding the arch-quack’s description and personal appearance: “The quack of quacks, the most perfect scoundrel that in these latter ages has marked the world’s history, we have found in the Count Alessandro di Cagliostro, pupil of the sage Althotas, foster child of the Scherif of Mecca, probably son of the last king of Trebizonde; named also Acharat, and unfortunate child of nature; by profession healer of diseases, abolisher of wrinkles, friend of the poor and impotent, grand-master of the Egyptian mason-lodge of high science, spirit-summoner, gold-cook, grand cophta, prophet, priest, and thaumaturgic moralist and swindler; really a liar of the first magnitude, thorough-paced in all provinces of lying, what one may call the king of liars. . . . One of the most authentic documents preserved of Joseph Balsamo is the picture of his visage. An effigy once universally diffused in oil paint, aquatint, marble, stucco, and perhaps gingerbread, decorating millions of apartments. Fittest of visitors, worthy to be worn by the quack of quacks! A most portentous face of scoundrelism: a fat, snub, abominable face; dew-lapped, flat-nosed, greasy, full of greediness, sensuality, ox-like obstinacy; a foreheadimpudent, refusing to be ashamed; and then two eyes turned up seraphically languishing, as if in divine contemplation and adoration; a touch of quiz, too; on the whole, perhaps the most perfect quack-face produced by the eighteenth century.” The subject of this flattering portrait was born in 1743, and died in the fortress of St Leo, Rome, after an imprisonment of six years, aged fifty-two.

The system of showing on oneself the effect of one’s own specifics has had many admirers and practisers. A Mrs Harden, in Newman Street, Oxford Street, used to advertise some years ago a hair-dye, the effect of which was to be seen on her own hair at her private residence, or at ladies’ own residences if preferred. In a similar manner a quack in the time of King Charles II. commenced his handbill with this statement: “Salvator Winter, an Italian of the city of Naples, aged 98 years, yet by the blessing of God, finds himself in health and as strong as any one of fifty, as to the sensitive part. Which first he attributes to God, and then to hisElixir Vitæ, which he always carries in his pocket adayes, and at night under his pillow. And when he finds himself distempered he taketh a spoonful or two, according as need requireth.” He then goes on to state that people should call and see its effect on him, and purchase so as to ensure health.

A most original, unique, and successful humbug, quite worthy of mention here, though not a dealer in medicines, was the late Monsieur Mangin of Paris. While passing through the public streets, there was nothing in his personal appearance to distinguish him from any ordinary gentleman. He drove a pair of bay horses, attached to an open carriage with two seats, the back one always occupied by his valet. Sometimes he would take up his stand in the Champs Elysées; at other times near the column in the Place Vendôme; but usually he was seen in the afternoon in the Place de la Bastille, or the Place de la Madeleine. On Sundays his favourite locality was the Place de la Bourse.Mangin was a well-formed, stately-looking individual, with a most self-satisfied countenance, which seemed to say, “I am master here; and all that my auditors have to do is, to listen and obey.” Arriving at his destined stopping-place, his carriage halted. His servant handed him a case from which he took several large portraits of himself, which he hung prominently upon the sides of his carriage, and also placed in front of him a vase filled with medals bearing his likeness on one side, and a description of the blacklead pencils in which he traded on the other. He then leisurely commenced a change of costume. His round hat was replaced by a magnificent burnished helmet, mounted with rich plumes of various brilliant colours. His overcoat was laid aside, and he donned in its stead a costly velvet tunic with gold fringes. He then drew a pair of polished steel gauntlets upon his hands, covered his breast with a brilliant cuirass, and placed a richly-mounted sword at his side. His servant watched him closely, and upon receiving a sign from his master he too put on his official costume, which consisted of a velvet robe and a helmet. The servant then struck up a tune on the richly-toned organ which always formed a part of Mangin’s apparatus. The grotesque appearance of these individuals, and the music, soon drew together an admiring crowd. Then the charlatan stood up. His manner was calm, dignified, imposing, indeed, almost solemn, for his face was as serious as that of the chief mourner at a funeral. His sharp, intelligent eye scrutinised the throng which was pressing around his carriage, until it rested apparently upon some particular individual, then he gave a start; then, with a dark, angry expression, as if the sight was repulsive, he abruptly dropped the visor of his helmet and thus covered his face from the gaze of the anxious crowd. Thus far he had not spoken a word. At last the prelude ended, and the comedy commenced. Stepping forward again to the front of the carriage, he exclaimed—“Gentlemen, you look astonished! You seem to wonderand ask yourselves, who is this modern Quixote? What mean this costume of bygone centuries—this golden chariot—these richly-caparisoned steeds? What is the name, what the purpose of this curious knight-errant? Gentlemen, I will condescend to answer your queries. I am Monsieur Mangin, the great charlatan of France! Yes, gentlemen, I am a charlatan—a mountebank; it is my profession, not from choice, but from necessity. You, gentlemen, created that necessity! You would not patronise true, unpretending, honest merit, but you are attracted by my glittering casque, my sweeping crest, my waving plumes. You are captivated by din and glitter, and therein lies my strength. Years ago I hired a modest shop in the Rue Rivoli, but I could not sell pencils enough to pay my rent, whereas, by assuming this disguise—it is nothing else—I have succeeded in attracting general attention, and in selling literally millions of my pencils; and I assure you, there is at this moment scarcely an artist in France or in Great Britain who does not know that I manufacture by far the best blacklead pencils ever seen.” And Mangin so far differed from other mountebanks in the fact that his wares were everywhere said to be superior to any others.

Speaking of Mangin reminds us of another French itinerant who forms the central figure of a rather amusing story. In July 1817 a man of imposing figure, wearing a large sabre and immense moustache, arrived at one of the principal inns of a provincial city in France, with a female of agreeable shape and enchanting mien. He alighted at the moment the dinner was being served up at thetable d’hôte. His martial appearance and bearing caused all the guests to rise with respect; they felt assured he must be a lieutenant-general or a major-general at least. A new governor was expected in the province about this time, and everybody believed that it was he who had arrived incognito. The officer ofgens d’armesgave him the place of honour, the comptroller of the customs and the receiver of taxessat each by the side of madame, and exerted their wit and gallantry to the utmost. All the tit-bits, all the most exquisite wines, were placed before the fortunate couple. At length the party broke up, and every one ran to report through the city that M. le Gouverneur had arrived. But, oh, what was their surprise, when the next day his Excellency, clad in a scarlet coat, and his august companion, dressed out in a gown glittering with tinsel, mounted a small open calash, and preceded by some musicians, went about the squares and public ways selling Swiss tea and balm of Mecca! Imagine the fury of the guests! They complained to themaire, and demanded that the audacious quack should be compelled to lay aside the characteristic mark of the brave. The prudent magistrate assembled the common council; and those respectable persons, after a long deliberation, considering that nothing in the charter forbad a citizen to let his beard grow on his upper lip, dismissed the complaint altogether. The same evening the supposed governor gave a serenade to the offended diners, and the next day took his leave, and continued his journey amid the acclamations of the populace.

It would be interesting to know what quack—for a quack it certainly must have been—was first responsible for the belief that a child’s caul would save a man from drowning. The origin of this fiction is, however, hidden under the dust of ages. It is customary for people who assume what they wish to believe, to state that the superstition went out when education came in; but that such is not the case a perusal of the advertisement sheets of current journals will show. Here is a rather curious specimen of a generationago:—

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