A MATCH

ARRIV’D, at last, Niagara to scan,He walks erect and feels himself a man;Surveys the cataract with a “critic’s eye,”Resolv’d to pass no “imperfections by”—Niag’ra, wonder of the Deity,Where God’s own spirit reigns in majesty.With sullen roar the foaming billows sweep;A world of waters thunders o’er the steep;The unmingled colours laugh upon the spray,And one eternal rainbow gilds the day.Oh, glorious God! Oh, scene surpassing all!“True, true,” quoth he, “’tis something of a fall.”Now, shall unpunish’d such a vagrant band,Pour like the plagues of Egypt on the land,Eyeing each fault, to all perfection blind,Shedding the taint of a malignant mind?From the Trollopiad.

ARRIV’D, at last, Niagara to scan,He walks erect and feels himself a man;Surveys the cataract with a “critic’s eye,”Resolv’d to pass no “imperfections by”—Niag’ra, wonder of the Deity,Where God’s own spirit reigns in majesty.With sullen roar the foaming billows sweep;A world of waters thunders o’er the steep;The unmingled colours laugh upon the spray,And one eternal rainbow gilds the day.Oh, glorious God! Oh, scene surpassing all!“True, true,” quoth he, “’tis something of a fall.”Now, shall unpunish’d such a vagrant band,Pour like the plagues of Egypt on the land,Eyeing each fault, to all perfection blind,Shedding the taint of a malignant mind?From the Trollopiad.

ARRIV’D, at last, Niagara to scan,He walks erect and feels himself a man;Surveys the cataract with a “critic’s eye,”Resolv’d to pass no “imperfections by”—Niag’ra, wonder of the Deity,Where God’s own spirit reigns in majesty.With sullen roar the foaming billows sweep;A world of waters thunders o’er the steep;The unmingled colours laugh upon the spray,And one eternal rainbow gilds the day.Oh, glorious God! Oh, scene surpassing all!“True, true,” quoth he, “’tis something of a fall.”Now, shall unpunish’d such a vagrant band,Pour like the plagues of Egypt on the land,Eyeing each fault, to all perfection blind,Shedding the taint of a malignant mind?From the Trollopiad.

ARRIV’D, at last, Niagara to scan,

He walks erect and feels himself a man;

Surveys the cataract with a “critic’s eye,”

Resolv’d to pass no “imperfections by”—

Niag’ra, wonder of the Deity,

Where God’s own spirit reigns in majesty.

With sullen roar the foaming billows sweep;

A world of waters thunders o’er the steep;

The unmingled colours laugh upon the spray,

And one eternal rainbow gilds the day.

Oh, glorious God! Oh, scene surpassing all!

“True, true,” quoth he, “’tis something of a fall.”

Now, shall unpunish’d such a vagrant band,

Pour like the plagues of Egypt on the land,

Eyeing each fault, to all perfection blind,

Shedding the taint of a malignant mind?

From the Trollopiad.

IF I were Anglo-Saxon,And you were Japanese,We’d study storks together,Pluck out the peacock’s feather,And lean our languid backs onThe stiffest of settees—If I were Anglo-Saxon,And you were Japanese.If you were Della-Cruscan,And I were A.-Mooresque,We’d make our limbs look less inArtistic folds, and dress inWhat once were tunics TuscanIn Dante’s days grotesque—If you were Della-Cruscan,And I were A.-Mooresque.If I were mock Pompeian,And you Belgravian Greek,We’d glide ’mid gaping VandalsIn shapeless sheets and sandals,Like shades in TartareanDim ways remote and bleak—If I were mock Pompeian,And you Belgravian Greek.If you were Culture’s scarecrow,And I the guy of Art,I’d learn in latest phrasesOf either’s quaintest crazesTo lisp, and let my hair grow,While yours you’d cease to part—If you were Culture’s scarecrow,And I the guy of Art.If I’d a Botticelli,And you’d a new Burne-Jones,We’d dote for days and days onTheir mystic hues, and gaze onWith lowering looks that fellyWe’d fix upon their tones—If I’d a Botticelli,And you’d a new Burne-Jones.If you were skilled at crewels,And I a dab at rhymes,I’d write delirious “ballads,”While you your bilious saladsWere stitching upon two ellsOf coarsest crash, at times—If you were skilled at crewels,And I a dab at rhymes.If I were what’s “consummate,”And you were quite “too, too,”’Twould be our EldoradoTo have a yellow dado,Our happiness to hum atA teapot tinted blue—If I were what’s “consummate,”And you were quite “too, too.”If you were what “intense” is,And I were like “decay,”We’d mutely muse, or mutterIn terms distinctly utter,And find out what the sense isOf this æsthetic lay—If you were what “intense” is,And I were like “decay.”If you were wan, my lady,And I your lover weird,We’d sit and wink for hoursAt languid lily-flowers,Till, fain of all things fady,We faintly—disappeared—If you were wan, my lady,And I your lover weird.Punch.

IF I were Anglo-Saxon,And you were Japanese,We’d study storks together,Pluck out the peacock’s feather,And lean our languid backs onThe stiffest of settees—If I were Anglo-Saxon,And you were Japanese.If you were Della-Cruscan,And I were A.-Mooresque,We’d make our limbs look less inArtistic folds, and dress inWhat once were tunics TuscanIn Dante’s days grotesque—If you were Della-Cruscan,And I were A.-Mooresque.If I were mock Pompeian,And you Belgravian Greek,We’d glide ’mid gaping VandalsIn shapeless sheets and sandals,Like shades in TartareanDim ways remote and bleak—If I were mock Pompeian,And you Belgravian Greek.If you were Culture’s scarecrow,And I the guy of Art,I’d learn in latest phrasesOf either’s quaintest crazesTo lisp, and let my hair grow,While yours you’d cease to part—If you were Culture’s scarecrow,And I the guy of Art.If I’d a Botticelli,And you’d a new Burne-Jones,We’d dote for days and days onTheir mystic hues, and gaze onWith lowering looks that fellyWe’d fix upon their tones—If I’d a Botticelli,And you’d a new Burne-Jones.If you were skilled at crewels,And I a dab at rhymes,I’d write delirious “ballads,”While you your bilious saladsWere stitching upon two ellsOf coarsest crash, at times—If you were skilled at crewels,And I a dab at rhymes.If I were what’s “consummate,”And you were quite “too, too,”’Twould be our EldoradoTo have a yellow dado,Our happiness to hum atA teapot tinted blue—If I were what’s “consummate,”And you were quite “too, too.”If you were what “intense” is,And I were like “decay,”We’d mutely muse, or mutterIn terms distinctly utter,And find out what the sense isOf this æsthetic lay—If you were what “intense” is,And I were like “decay.”If you were wan, my lady,And I your lover weird,We’d sit and wink for hoursAt languid lily-flowers,Till, fain of all things fady,We faintly—disappeared—If you were wan, my lady,And I your lover weird.Punch.

IF I were Anglo-Saxon,And you were Japanese,We’d study storks together,Pluck out the peacock’s feather,And lean our languid backs onThe stiffest of settees—If I were Anglo-Saxon,And you were Japanese.If you were Della-Cruscan,And I were A.-Mooresque,We’d make our limbs look less inArtistic folds, and dress inWhat once were tunics TuscanIn Dante’s days grotesque—If you were Della-Cruscan,And I were A.-Mooresque.

IF I were Anglo-Saxon,

And you were Japanese,

We’d study storks together,

Pluck out the peacock’s feather,

And lean our languid backs on

The stiffest of settees—

If I were Anglo-Saxon,

And you were Japanese.

If you were Della-Cruscan,

And I were A.-Mooresque,

We’d make our limbs look less in

Artistic folds, and dress in

What once were tunics Tuscan

In Dante’s days grotesque—

If you were Della-Cruscan,

And I were A.-Mooresque.

If I were mock Pompeian,And you Belgravian Greek,We’d glide ’mid gaping VandalsIn shapeless sheets and sandals,Like shades in TartareanDim ways remote and bleak—If I were mock Pompeian,And you Belgravian Greek.

If I were mock Pompeian,

And you Belgravian Greek,

We’d glide ’mid gaping Vandals

In shapeless sheets and sandals,

Like shades in Tartarean

Dim ways remote and bleak—

If I were mock Pompeian,

And you Belgravian Greek.

If you were Culture’s scarecrow,And I the guy of Art,I’d learn in latest phrasesOf either’s quaintest crazesTo lisp, and let my hair grow,While yours you’d cease to part—If you were Culture’s scarecrow,And I the guy of Art.

If you were Culture’s scarecrow,

And I the guy of Art,

I’d learn in latest phrases

Of either’s quaintest crazes

To lisp, and let my hair grow,

While yours you’d cease to part—

If you were Culture’s scarecrow,

And I the guy of Art.

If I’d a Botticelli,And you’d a new Burne-Jones,We’d dote for days and days onTheir mystic hues, and gaze onWith lowering looks that fellyWe’d fix upon their tones—If I’d a Botticelli,And you’d a new Burne-Jones.

If I’d a Botticelli,

And you’d a new Burne-Jones,

We’d dote for days and days on

Their mystic hues, and gaze on

With lowering looks that felly

We’d fix upon their tones—

If I’d a Botticelli,

And you’d a new Burne-Jones.

If you were skilled at crewels,And I a dab at rhymes,I’d write delirious “ballads,”While you your bilious saladsWere stitching upon two ellsOf coarsest crash, at times—If you were skilled at crewels,And I a dab at rhymes.

If you were skilled at crewels,

And I a dab at rhymes,

I’d write delirious “ballads,”

While you your bilious salads

Were stitching upon two ells

Of coarsest crash, at times—

If you were skilled at crewels,

And I a dab at rhymes.

If I were what’s “consummate,”And you were quite “too, too,”’Twould be our EldoradoTo have a yellow dado,Our happiness to hum atA teapot tinted blue—If I were what’s “consummate,”And you were quite “too, too.”

If I were what’s “consummate,”

And you were quite “too, too,”

’Twould be our Eldorado

To have a yellow dado,

Our happiness to hum at

A teapot tinted blue—

If I were what’s “consummate,”

And you were quite “too, too.”

If you were what “intense” is,And I were like “decay,”We’d mutely muse, or mutterIn terms distinctly utter,And find out what the sense isOf this æsthetic lay—If you were what “intense” is,And I were like “decay.”

If you were what “intense” is,

And I were like “decay,”

We’d mutely muse, or mutter

In terms distinctly utter,

And find out what the sense is

Of this æsthetic lay—

If you were what “intense” is,

And I were like “decay.”

If you were wan, my lady,And I your lover weird,We’d sit and wink for hoursAt languid lily-flowers,Till, fain of all things fady,We faintly—disappeared—If you were wan, my lady,And I your lover weird.Punch.

If you were wan, my lady,

And I your lover weird,

We’d sit and wink for hours

At languid lily-flowers,

Till, fain of all things fady,

We faintly—disappeared—

If you were wan, my lady,

And I your lover weird.

Punch.

AGOVERNESS wanted—well fitted to fillThe post of tuition with competent skill—In a gentleman’s family highly genteel;Superior attainments are quite indispensable,With everything, too, that’s correct and ostensible;Morals of pure unexceptionability;Manners well formed, and of strictest gentility.The pupils are five—ages, six to sixteen,All as promising girls as ever were seen;And besides (though ’tis scarcely worth while to put that in),There is one little boy, but he only learns Latin.The lady must teach all the several branchesWhereinto polite education now launches.She’s expected to speak the French tongue like a native,And be to her pupils of all its points dative.Italian she must knowà fond, nor need banishWhatever acquaintance she may have with Spanish;Nor would there be harm in a trifle of German,In the absence, that is, of the master, Von Hermann.The harp and piano—cela va sans dire—With thorough-bass, too, on the plan of Logier.In drawing in pencil, and chalks, and the tintingThat’s called Oriental, she must not be stint in;She must paint upon paper, and satin, and velvet;And if she knows gilding, she’s no need to shelve it.Dancing, of course, with the newest gambades,The Polish mazurka, and best gallopades;Arithmetic, history joined with chronology,Heraldry, botany, writing, conchology,Grammar, and satin stitch, netting, geography,Astronomy, use of the globes, and cosmography.’Twere also as well she should be calisthenical,That her charges’ young limbs may be pliant to any call.Their health, play, and studies, and moral conditionMust be superintended without intermission.At home she must all habits check that disparage,And when they go out must attend to their carriage.Her faith must be orthodox, temper most pliable,Health good, and reference quite undeniable.These are the principal matters—Au reste,Address, Bury Street, Mrs. General Peste.As thesalary’s moderate, none need applyWho more on that point than oncomfortrely.Anonymous.

AGOVERNESS wanted—well fitted to fillThe post of tuition with competent skill—In a gentleman’s family highly genteel;Superior attainments are quite indispensable,With everything, too, that’s correct and ostensible;Morals of pure unexceptionability;Manners well formed, and of strictest gentility.The pupils are five—ages, six to sixteen,All as promising girls as ever were seen;And besides (though ’tis scarcely worth while to put that in),There is one little boy, but he only learns Latin.The lady must teach all the several branchesWhereinto polite education now launches.She’s expected to speak the French tongue like a native,And be to her pupils of all its points dative.Italian she must knowà fond, nor need banishWhatever acquaintance she may have with Spanish;Nor would there be harm in a trifle of German,In the absence, that is, of the master, Von Hermann.The harp and piano—cela va sans dire—With thorough-bass, too, on the plan of Logier.In drawing in pencil, and chalks, and the tintingThat’s called Oriental, she must not be stint in;She must paint upon paper, and satin, and velvet;And if she knows gilding, she’s no need to shelve it.Dancing, of course, with the newest gambades,The Polish mazurka, and best gallopades;Arithmetic, history joined with chronology,Heraldry, botany, writing, conchology,Grammar, and satin stitch, netting, geography,Astronomy, use of the globes, and cosmography.’Twere also as well she should be calisthenical,That her charges’ young limbs may be pliant to any call.Their health, play, and studies, and moral conditionMust be superintended without intermission.At home she must all habits check that disparage,And when they go out must attend to their carriage.Her faith must be orthodox, temper most pliable,Health good, and reference quite undeniable.These are the principal matters—Au reste,Address, Bury Street, Mrs. General Peste.As thesalary’s moderate, none need applyWho more on that point than oncomfortrely.Anonymous.

AGOVERNESS wanted—well fitted to fillThe post of tuition with competent skill—In a gentleman’s family highly genteel;Superior attainments are quite indispensable,With everything, too, that’s correct and ostensible;Morals of pure unexceptionability;Manners well formed, and of strictest gentility.The pupils are five—ages, six to sixteen,All as promising girls as ever were seen;And besides (though ’tis scarcely worth while to put that in),There is one little boy, but he only learns Latin.The lady must teach all the several branchesWhereinto polite education now launches.She’s expected to speak the French tongue like a native,And be to her pupils of all its points dative.Italian she must knowà fond, nor need banishWhatever acquaintance she may have with Spanish;Nor would there be harm in a trifle of German,In the absence, that is, of the master, Von Hermann.The harp and piano—cela va sans dire—With thorough-bass, too, on the plan of Logier.In drawing in pencil, and chalks, and the tintingThat’s called Oriental, she must not be stint in;She must paint upon paper, and satin, and velvet;And if she knows gilding, she’s no need to shelve it.Dancing, of course, with the newest gambades,The Polish mazurka, and best gallopades;Arithmetic, history joined with chronology,Heraldry, botany, writing, conchology,Grammar, and satin stitch, netting, geography,Astronomy, use of the globes, and cosmography.’Twere also as well she should be calisthenical,That her charges’ young limbs may be pliant to any call.Their health, play, and studies, and moral conditionMust be superintended without intermission.At home she must all habits check that disparage,And when they go out must attend to their carriage.Her faith must be orthodox, temper most pliable,Health good, and reference quite undeniable.These are the principal matters—Au reste,Address, Bury Street, Mrs. General Peste.As thesalary’s moderate, none need applyWho more on that point than oncomfortrely.Anonymous.

AGOVERNESS wanted—well fitted to fill

The post of tuition with competent skill—

In a gentleman’s family highly genteel;

Superior attainments are quite indispensable,

With everything, too, that’s correct and ostensible;

Morals of pure unexceptionability;

Manners well formed, and of strictest gentility.

The pupils are five—ages, six to sixteen,

All as promising girls as ever were seen;

And besides (though ’tis scarcely worth while to put that in),

There is one little boy, but he only learns Latin.

The lady must teach all the several branches

Whereinto polite education now launches.

She’s expected to speak the French tongue like a native,

And be to her pupils of all its points dative.

Italian she must knowà fond, nor need banish

Whatever acquaintance she may have with Spanish;

Nor would there be harm in a trifle of German,

In the absence, that is, of the master, Von Hermann.

The harp and piano—cela va sans dire—

With thorough-bass, too, on the plan of Logier.

In drawing in pencil, and chalks, and the tinting

That’s called Oriental, she must not be stint in;

She must paint upon paper, and satin, and velvet;

And if she knows gilding, she’s no need to shelve it.

Dancing, of course, with the newest gambades,

The Polish mazurka, and best gallopades;

Arithmetic, history joined with chronology,

Heraldry, botany, writing, conchology,

Grammar, and satin stitch, netting, geography,

Astronomy, use of the globes, and cosmography.

’Twere also as well she should be calisthenical,

That her charges’ young limbs may be pliant to any call.

Their health, play, and studies, and moral condition

Must be superintended without intermission.

At home she must all habits check that disparage,

And when they go out must attend to their carriage.

Her faith must be orthodox, temper most pliable,

Health good, and reference quite undeniable.

These are the principal matters—Au reste,

Address, Bury Street, Mrs. General Peste.

As thesalary’s moderate, none need apply

Who more on that point than oncomfortrely.

Anonymous.

I’M thankful that the sun and moonAre both hung up so high,That no presumptuous hand can stretchAnd pull them from the sky.If they were not, I have no doubtBut some reforming assWould recommend to take them downAnd light the world with gas.Anonymous.

I’M thankful that the sun and moonAre both hung up so high,That no presumptuous hand can stretchAnd pull them from the sky.If they were not, I have no doubtBut some reforming assWould recommend to take them downAnd light the world with gas.Anonymous.

I’M thankful that the sun and moonAre both hung up so high,That no presumptuous hand can stretchAnd pull them from the sky.If they were not, I have no doubtBut some reforming assWould recommend to take them downAnd light the world with gas.Anonymous.

I’M thankful that the sun and moon

Are both hung up so high,

That no presumptuous hand can stretch

And pull them from the sky.

If they were not, I have no doubt

But some reforming ass

Would recommend to take them down

And light the world with gas.

Anonymous.

PAGEAddress to the Unco Guid, or the Rigidly RighteousRobert Burns86Advanced Thinker, AnBrander Matthews282Æsthete, TheW. S. Gilbert260All-SaintsEdmund Yates237Anglicised UtopiaW. S. Gilbert252Annuity, TheGeorge Outram156Ape and the Lady, TheW. S. Gilbert250Ass’s Legacy, TheRutebœuf7Atlantic CityH. C. Bunner290Ballade of ExpansionHilda Johnson331Ballade of Literary FameAndrew Lang274Ballade of Old-Time Ladies, A (Translated by John Payne)François Villon11Battle of Blenheim, TheRobert Southey97Beauties of Nature, TheAnthony C. Deane317Bird in the Hand, AFrederick E. Weatherly281Boston Lullaby, AJames Jeffrey Roche277British Visitor, TheFrom the Trollopiad343Butterfly of Fashion, AOliver Herford322Cacoëthes ScribendiOliver Wendell Holmes166Carman’s Account of a Lawsuit, ASir David Lyndsay12Certain Cure, AAnthony C. Deane316Character of Holland, TheAndrew Marvell35Chorus of Anglomaniacs (From “The Buntling Ball”)Edgar Fawcett275Chorus of WomenAristophanes3Christmas Out of TownJames Smith103Cockle v. CackleThomas Hood140CologneSamuel T. Coleridge96Conservative, ACharlotte Perkins (Stetson) Gilman304Constant Lover, TheSir John Suckling27ContentmentOliver Wendell Holmes171Conundrum of the Workshops, TheRudyard Kipling326Country House Party, ALord Byron127Country Squire, TheTomas Yriarte80CriticsElizabeth Barrett Browning164Cui Bono?Thomas Carlyle135Cynical Ode to an Ultra-Cynical PublicCharles Mackay192Damages, Two Hundred PoundsWilliam Makepeace Thackeray182Description of HollandSamuel Butler30Devil at Home, TheThomas Kibble Hervey149Diamond Wedding, TheEdmund Clarence Stedman240DistichesJohn Hay264Dr. Delany’s VillaThomas Sheridan52Duke of Buckingham, TheJohn Dryden37EarthOliver Herford321Eggs, TheTomas Yriarte83Elegy on the Death of a Mad Dog, AnOliver Goldsmith72Epistle to Sir Robert Walpole, AnHenry Fielding65Epitaph, AnGeorge John Cayley64Epitaph, AnMatthew Prior43Eternal LondonThomas Moore105EtiquetteW. S. Gilbert254Evolution of a “Name,” TheCharles Battell Loomis310Extracts from the Rubaiyat of Omar CayenneGelett Burgess328Faithful Picture of Ordinary Society, AWilliam Cowper74FameJames Herbert Morse269Fame’s Penny TrumpetLewis Carroll238Familiar Letter to Several Correspondents, AOliver Wendell Holmes167Fate of Pious Dan, TheSamuel Walter Foss298Father-Land and Mother-TongueSamuel Lover135Father MolloySamuel Lover136Five LivesEdward Rowland Sill270Font in the Forest, TheHerman Knickerbocker Vielé294Fragment, AGrace Greenwood212Friar of Orders Gray, TheJohn O’Keefe79Friday Afternoon at the Boston Symphony HallFaulkner Armytage332Friend of Humanity and the Knife-Grinder, TheGeorge Canning92From “A Fable for Critics”James Russell Lowell201From “As You Like It”Shakespeare22From “English Bards and Scotch Reviewers”Lord Byron125From “King Henry IV.”Shakespeare20From “Love’s Labour’s Lost”Shakespeare21From “The Devil’s Drive”Lord Byron123From “The Epistle to Dr. Arbuthnot”Alexander Pope60From “The Feast of the Poets”James Henry Leigh Hunt116From “The House of a Hundred Lights”Frederic Ridgely Torrence340From “The Love of Fame”Edward Young50Furniture of a Woman’s Mind, TheJonathan Swift48Gaffer Gray (From “Hugh Trevor”)Thomas Holcroft139General SummaryRudyard Kipling324Giles’ HopeSamuel T. Coleridge96Give Me a ThemeRichard Watson Gilder274Great Critics, TheCharles Mackay193Greediness PunishedFriedrich Rückert130He and SheEugene Fitch Ware272Hem and HawBliss Carman307Hen, TheMatthew Claudius77Hiding the SkeletonGeorge Meredith229Hoch! der KaiserRodney Blake320Holy Willie’s PrayerRobert Burns88Horace Concocting an OdeThomas Dekker23How to Make a Man of ConsequenceMark Lemon173How To Make a NovelLord Charles Neaves150“Hurt that Honour Feels, The”Owen Seaman310Introduction to the True-Born EnglishmanDaniel Defoe41JobSamuel T. Coleridge95John JenkinsAnthony C. Deane313King of Yvetot, The (Version of W. M. Thackeray)Pierre Jean De Béranger109Kitty of ColeraineEdward Lysaght91Latest Decalogue, TheArthur Hugh Clough200Laureate, TheWilliam E. Aytoun194Let Us All Be Unhappy TogetherCharles Dibdin78Life in LaconicsMary Mapes Dodge263LinesStephen Crane337Lines by an Old FogyAnonymous348Literary Lady, TheRichard Brinsley Sheridan84Lost Leader, TheRobert Browning186Love-Letter, TheAustin Dobson267LyingThomas Moore108MalbrouckTranslated by Father Prout161Manly Heart, TheGeorge Wither26Man’s Requirements, AElizabeth Barrett Browning163Match, APunch343Meeting of the Clabberhuses, TheSamuel Walter Foss300MidgesRobert Bulwer Lytton230Miser, TheEdward Fitzgerald166Modern Puffing System, TheThomas Moore106Modest Wit, ASelleck Osborn112Mourner à la Mode, TheJohn Godfrey Saxe197Mr. Barney Maguire’s Account of the CoronationRichard Harris Barham119Mr. Molony’s Account of the Ball Given to theNepaulese Ambassador by the Peninsularand Oriental CompanyWilliam Makepeace Thackeray179My Lord TomnoddyRobert Barnabas Brough227Net of Law, TheJames Jeffrey Roche277Nora’s VowSir Walter Scott94Nothing to WearWilliam Allen Butler213Of a Certain ManSir John Harrington16Of ProprietyCharles Stuart Calverley235On a Magazine SonnetRussell Hilliard Loines321On Don SurlyBen Jonson24On JohnsonJohn Wolcott(Peter Pindar)75On LyttonAlfred Tennyson177On ShadwellJohn Dryden38On SmollettCharles Churchill73Origin of Sin, TheSamuel Walter Foss294Our VillageThomas Hood145OzymandiasPercy Bysshe Shelley134Paradise. A Hindoo LegendGeorge Birdseye319Pauper’s Drive, TheThomas Noel175Peace: A StudyCharles Stuart Calverley236Pelters of PyramidsRichard Hengist Horne155Philosopher, ASamuel Walter Foss295Philosopher’s Scales, TheJane Taylor114Pious Editor’s Creed, TheJames Russell Lowell206Poem to the Critic, TheRichard Watson Gilder274Poet and the Critics, TheAustin Dobson265Poet of Fashion, TheJames Smith101Pope and the Net, TheRobert Browning188Positivists, TheMortimer Collins225Precise Tailor, ASir John Harrington16Public Breakfast, TheChristopher Anstey67Quidnunckis, TheJohn Gay54Religion of Hudibras, TheSamuel Butler31Remedy Worse Than the Disease, TheMatthew Prior45Remonstrance, TheSir John Suckling28ReportersGeorge Crabbe85Revelry in IndiaBartholomew Dowling210Review, ABayard Taylor221Rich and Poor; or, Saint and SinnerThomas L. Peacock117Rich and the Poor Man, The (From theRussian of Kremnitzer)Sir John Bowring132Sailor’s Consolation, TheWilliam Pitt152Saintship versus ConscienceSamuel Butler29Same Old StoryHarry B. Smith306Sandys’ GhostAlexander Pope57Satire on Edward HowardCharles Sackville, Earl of Dorset39Satire on the ScotsJohn Cleiveland32Sceptics, TheBliss Carman308Scholar and His Dog, TheJohn Marston25Schoolmaster Abroad with His Son, TheCharles Stuart Calverley233Sick Man and the Angel, TheJohn Gay55Sky-MakingMortimer Collins226Sleep OnW. S. Gilbert249Sly LawyersGeorge Crabbe85Soliloquy of the Spanish CloisterRobert Browning190SongRichard Lovelace34Sonnet, AJ. K. Stephen284Sorrows of WertherWilliam Makepeace Thackeray178Soul’s Errand, TheSir Walter Raleigh13St. Anthony’s Sermon to the FishesAbraham á Sancta-Clara39SympathyReginald Heber111There Is No GodArthur Hugh Clough199They SaidEdith M. Thomas284Thought, AJ. K. Stephen283Three Black CrowsJohn Byrom63ThursdayFrederick Edward Weatherly280To BoswellJohn Wolcott(Peter Pindar)76To Miguel de Cervantes SaavedraRichard Kendall Munkittrick287To R. K.J. K. Stephen286To the Terrestrial GlobeW. S. Gilbert240To WomanLord Byron126Too LateFitz-Hugh Ludlow261Tool, TheRichard Watson Gilder273True to PollFrank C. Burnand247Twelve ArticlesJonathan Swift46Two CharactersHenry Taylor151Uncertain Man, TheWilliam Cowper74V-a-s-e, TheJames Jeffrey Roche278Verses on Seeing the Speaker Asleep in HisChair During One of the Debates of theFirst Reformed ParliamentWinthrop M. Praed154Wanted—A GovernessAnonymous346War Is KindStephen Crane336WedH. C. Bunner289Wedded BlissCharlotte Perkins (Stetson) Gilman303Well of St. Keyne, TheRobert Southey99What Will We Do?Robert J. Burdette272What’s In a Name?Richard Kendall Munkittrick288Widow Malone, TheCharles Lever173Will, TheJohn Donne18Wish for Length of Life, TheJuvenal6WomanFitz-Greene Halleck132Woman’s WillJohn Godfrey Saxe196Would-be Literary Bore, AHorace4

Address to the Unco Guid, or the Rigidly Righteous

Robert Burns

Advanced Thinker, An

Brander Matthews

Æsthete, The

W. S. Gilbert

All-Saints

Edmund Yates

Anglicised Utopia

W. S. Gilbert

Annuity, The

George Outram

Ape and the Lady, The

W. S. Gilbert

Ass’s Legacy, The

Rutebœuf

Atlantic City

H. C. Bunner

Ballade of Expansion

Hilda Johnson

Ballade of Literary Fame

Andrew Lang

Ballade of Old-Time Ladies, A (Translated by John Payne)

François Villon

Battle of Blenheim, The

Robert Southey

Beauties of Nature, The

Anthony C. Deane

Bird in the Hand, A

Frederick E. Weatherly

Boston Lullaby, A

James Jeffrey Roche

British Visitor, The

From the Trollopiad

Butterfly of Fashion, A

Oliver Herford

Cacoëthes Scribendi

Oliver Wendell Holmes

Carman’s Account of a Lawsuit, A

Sir David Lyndsay

Certain Cure, A

Anthony C. Deane

Character of Holland, The

Andrew Marvell

Chorus of Anglomaniacs (From “The Buntling Ball”)

Edgar Fawcett

Chorus of Women

Aristophanes

Christmas Out of Town

James Smith

Cockle v. Cackle

Thomas Hood

Cologne

Samuel T. Coleridge

Conservative, A

Charlotte Perkins (Stetson) Gilman

Constant Lover, The

Sir John Suckling

Contentment

Oliver Wendell Holmes

Conundrum of the Workshops, The

Rudyard Kipling

Country House Party, A

Lord Byron

Country Squire, The

Tomas Yriarte

Critics

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Cui Bono?

Thomas Carlyle

Cynical Ode to an Ultra-Cynical Public

Charles Mackay

Damages, Two Hundred Pounds

William Makepeace Thackeray

Description of Holland

Samuel Butler

Devil at Home, The

Thomas Kibble Hervey

Diamond Wedding, The

Edmund Clarence Stedman

Distiches

John Hay

Dr. Delany’s Villa

Thomas Sheridan

Duke of Buckingham, The

John Dryden

Earth

Oliver Herford

Eggs, The

Tomas Yriarte

Elegy on the Death of a Mad Dog, An

Oliver Goldsmith

Epistle to Sir Robert Walpole, An

Henry Fielding

Epitaph, An

George John Cayley

Epitaph, An

Matthew Prior

Eternal London

Thomas Moore

Etiquette

W. S. Gilbert

Evolution of a “Name,” The

Charles Battell Loomis

Extracts from the Rubaiyat of Omar Cayenne

Gelett Burgess

Faithful Picture of Ordinary Society, A

William Cowper

Fame

James Herbert Morse

Fame’s Penny Trumpet

Lewis Carroll

Familiar Letter to Several Correspondents, A

Oliver Wendell Holmes

Fate of Pious Dan, The

Samuel Walter Foss

Father-Land and Mother-Tongue

Samuel Lover

Father Molloy

Samuel Lover

Five Lives

Edward Rowland Sill

Font in the Forest, The

Herman Knickerbocker Vielé

Fragment, A

Grace Greenwood

Friar of Orders Gray, The

John O’Keefe

Friday Afternoon at the Boston Symphony Hall

Faulkner Armytage

Friend of Humanity and the Knife-Grinder, The

George Canning

From “A Fable for Critics”

James Russell Lowell

From “As You Like It”

Shakespeare

From “English Bards and Scotch Reviewers”

Lord Byron

From “King Henry IV.”

Shakespeare

From “Love’s Labour’s Lost”

Shakespeare

From “The Devil’s Drive”

Lord Byron

From “The Epistle to Dr. Arbuthnot”

Alexander Pope

From “The Feast of the Poets”

James Henry Leigh Hunt

From “The House of a Hundred Lights”

Frederic Ridgely Torrence

From “The Love of Fame”

Edward Young

Furniture of a Woman’s Mind, The

Jonathan Swift

Gaffer Gray (From “Hugh Trevor”)

Thomas Holcroft

General Summary

Rudyard Kipling

Giles’ Hope

Samuel T. Coleridge

Give Me a Theme

Richard Watson Gilder

Great Critics, The

Charles Mackay

Greediness Punished

Friedrich Rückert

He and She

Eugene Fitch Ware

Hem and Haw

Bliss Carman

Hen, The

Matthew Claudius

Hiding the Skeleton

George Meredith

Hoch! der Kaiser

Rodney Blake

Holy Willie’s Prayer

Robert Burns

Horace Concocting an Ode

Thomas Dekker

How to Make a Man of Consequence

Mark Lemon

How To Make a Novel

Lord Charles Neaves

“Hurt that Honour Feels, The”

Owen Seaman

Introduction to the True-Born Englishman

Daniel Defoe

Job

Samuel T. Coleridge

John Jenkins

Anthony C. Deane

King of Yvetot, The (Version of W. M. Thackeray)

Pierre Jean De Béranger

Kitty of Coleraine

Edward Lysaght

Latest Decalogue, The

Arthur Hugh Clough

Laureate, The

William E. Aytoun

Let Us All Be Unhappy Together

Charles Dibdin

Life in Laconics

Mary Mapes Dodge

Lines

Stephen Crane

Lines by an Old Fogy

Anonymous

Literary Lady, The

Richard Brinsley Sheridan

Lost Leader, The

Robert Browning

Love-Letter, The

Austin Dobson

Lying

Thomas Moore

Malbrouck

Translated by Father Prout

Manly Heart, The

George Wither

Man’s Requirements, A

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Match, A

Punch

Meeting of the Clabberhuses, The

Samuel Walter Foss

Midges

Robert Bulwer Lytton

Miser, The

Edward Fitzgerald

Modern Puffing System, The

Thomas Moore

Modest Wit, A

Selleck Osborn

Mourner à la Mode, The

John Godfrey Saxe

Mr. Barney Maguire’s Account of the Coronation

Richard Harris Barham

Mr. Molony’s Account of the Ball Given to theNepaulese Ambassador by the Peninsularand Oriental Company

William Makepeace Thackeray

My Lord Tomnoddy

Robert Barnabas Brough

Net of Law, The

James Jeffrey Roche

Nora’s Vow

Sir Walter Scott

Nothing to Wear

William Allen Butler

Of a Certain Man

Sir John Harrington

Of Propriety

Charles Stuart Calverley

On a Magazine Sonnet

Russell Hilliard Loines

On Don Surly

Ben Jonson

On Johnson

John Wolcott(Peter Pindar)

On Lytton

Alfred Tennyson

On Shadwell

John Dryden

On Smollett

Charles Churchill

Origin of Sin, The

Samuel Walter Foss

Our Village

Thomas Hood

Ozymandias

Percy Bysshe Shelley

Paradise. A Hindoo Legend

George Birdseye

Pauper’s Drive, The

Thomas Noel

Peace: A Study

Charles Stuart Calverley

Pelters of Pyramids

Richard Hengist Horne

Philosopher, A

Samuel Walter Foss

Philosopher’s Scales, The

Jane Taylor

Pious Editor’s Creed, The

James Russell Lowell

Poem to the Critic, The

Richard Watson Gilder

Poet and the Critics, The

Austin Dobson

Poet of Fashion, The

James Smith

Pope and the Net, The

Robert Browning

Positivists, The

Mortimer Collins

Precise Tailor, A

Sir John Harrington

Public Breakfast, The

Christopher Anstey

Quidnunckis, The

John Gay

Religion of Hudibras, The

Samuel Butler

Remedy Worse Than the Disease, The

Matthew Prior

Remonstrance, The

Sir John Suckling

Reporters

George Crabbe

Revelry in India

Bartholomew Dowling

Review, A

Bayard Taylor

Rich and Poor; or, Saint and Sinner

Thomas L. Peacock

Rich and the Poor Man, The (From theRussian of Kremnitzer)

Sir John Bowring

Sailor’s Consolation, The

William Pitt

Saintship versus Conscience

Samuel Butler

Same Old Story

Harry B. Smith

Sandys’ Ghost

Alexander Pope

Satire on Edward Howard

Charles Sackville, Earl of Dorset

Satire on the Scots

John Cleiveland

Sceptics, The

Bliss Carman

Scholar and His Dog, The

John Marston

Schoolmaster Abroad with His Son, The

Charles Stuart Calverley

Sick Man and the Angel, The

John Gay

Sky-Making

Mortimer Collins

Sleep On

W. S. Gilbert

Sly Lawyers

George Crabbe

Soliloquy of the Spanish Cloister

Robert Browning

Song

Richard Lovelace

Sonnet, A

J. K. Stephen

Sorrows of Werther

William Makepeace Thackeray

Soul’s Errand, The

Sir Walter Raleigh

St. Anthony’s Sermon to the Fishes

Abraham á Sancta-Clara

Sympathy

Reginald Heber

There Is No God

Arthur Hugh Clough

They Said

Edith M. Thomas

Thought, A

J. K. Stephen

Three Black Crows

John Byrom

Thursday

Frederick Edward Weatherly

To Boswell

John Wolcott(Peter Pindar)

To Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

Richard Kendall Munkittrick

To R. K.

J. K. Stephen

To the Terrestrial Globe

W. S. Gilbert

To Woman

Lord Byron

Too Late

Fitz-Hugh Ludlow

Tool, The

Richard Watson Gilder

True to Poll

Frank C. Burnand

Twelve Articles

Jonathan Swift

Two Characters

Henry Taylor

Uncertain Man, The

William Cowper

V-a-s-e, The

James Jeffrey Roche

Verses on Seeing the Speaker Asleep in HisChair During One of the Debates of theFirst Reformed Parliament

Winthrop M. Praed

Wanted—A Governess

Anonymous

War Is Kind

Stephen Crane

Wed

H. C. Bunner

Wedded Bliss

Charlotte Perkins (Stetson) Gilman

Well of St. Keyne, The

Robert Southey

What Will We Do?

Robert J. Burdette

What’s In a Name?

Richard Kendall Munkittrick

Widow Malone, The

Charles Lever

Will, The

John Donne

Wish for Length of Life, The

Juvenal

Woman

Fitz-Greene Halleck

Woman’s Will

John Godfrey Saxe

Would-be Literary Bore, A

Horace

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