"I WANT YOU"
TO say that both Mrs. Wharnecliffe and Thorold were very uneasy about their young protégé would be to state it very mildly.
If Mrs. Wharnecliffe had not had her husband in bed with one of his bad attacks of gout, she would have gone up to town herself and taken Gentian under her motherly wing. She knew Mrs. St. Lucas, and was well aware of her happy-go-lucky Bohemian propensities.
As to Thorold, he thought about Gentian night and day; he longed to cast prudence and diffidence to the winds, and go up to London and fetch her down to Cornwall, where she could once more be under his protecting care. But when he had written to her, he waited patiently, dreading, yet sometimes almost longing, to receive a summons from her.
And then about the middle of July it came.
A telegram was handed to him as he was starting to meet his manager at the mine, one morning about ten o'clock.
It was very brief.
"I want you—Gentian."
He flung a few things into his suit-case, borrowed Mr. Muir's car and caught the morning express from Liskeard to town. She had wired to him from a country inn just outside Maidenhead. He did not get there till about six o'clock. The landlady came to the door at once.
"You'll be the young lady's cousin or guardian, so she tells me. She ought to be in bed, but she's on the couch in the best parlour. Come this way, please."
"Is she ill—an accident—what is the matter?
"The doctor says 'tis a marvel: she's escaped with bruises and a sprained wrist. She was pitched right out of the car, and found underneath it."
"Who was with her?"
"Nobody, she drove herself down from town, and turning a corner ran into some felled trees. I always do say that for a reckless driver, give me a young lady!"
Thorold said nothing. He followed her to a small dingy parlour at the back of the house, and there, covered with an old plaid shawl, upon a horsehair couch, lay Gentian. An ugly bruise and plastered cut on her forehead and a bandaged wrist were the only evidences of her accident, but she looked white and shaken, and could only faintly smile as she looked up at him.
"I knew you would come. I told the landlady so."
He stood looking down upon her with his kind eyes.
"Do your friends know where you are?"
"No. I have run away from them."
It was so like Gentian, that Thorold could have smiled, had he been less concerned about her.
And then she held out her unhurt hand to him, and when she had got hold of his hand, clutched it as if she could never let it go, and burst into a flood of tears.
He stood silent beside her, for he knew that her tears would relieve her, and then he said gently:
"Don't bother to talk. I'll wait to be told things till you're feeling better, but I must let Mrs. St. Lucas know where you are, and I would like to see the doctor."
"Don't tell Mrs. St. Lucas, don't! He will come down and make a fuss. We were going up to Chester and York—a kind of tour—and I won't go, and he'll be angry."
She was struggling to get the better of her tears.
"I must wire to relieve their anxiety, but I won't say where you are. I will say you are returning home with me. I will write later when you can give me details."
He left the room. He was always prompt and practical. When he returned, he had seen the doctor, wired to Mrs. St. Lucas, and ordered a nice little dinner to be sent into the parlour for himself and Gentian. He had also got a room for himself at an hotel in Maidenhead.
He found Gentian looking much better and brighter.
"It's all right now you are here," she said, "I'm ready to explain all."
"Not yet. We will have some food first. What a fortunate thing you were so near this inn!"
"Yes; one of the ostlers heard the crash and ran out. It was only just round the corner. Such a corner! They ought to have put up warning lights, but I suppose I was reckless—I felt so."
She could not eat much, she said her head was bad, but she drank a cup of tea, and she looked up at him pathetically when he helped her back to the couch.
"If only I was feeling well, how much we could enjoy ourselves!" she said.
A little later the meal was carried away, and then he drew up a chair to her side, and with her hand lightly clasping his she told her story.
"Do you know Mr. Buchan? He is very amusing, and alive to his finger-tips, and he's a passionate, magnificent violinist. He loves his violin like nothing in the world, and he amuses himself with everybody else. He liked me, and he was awfully nice, and respectful and courteous, and all he ought to be, until we had finished our London recitals. Then he was tired and his nerves were on edge, and he would take me about to places I did not like, and he began to take liberties, called me by my Christian name, and was always taking hold of me, and talking in a silly inane fashion. He thought I liked it, until one day I made myself very angry and showed him that I did not intend to be treated so. Then he did it to tease me.
"The night before last, Mrs. St. Lucas had a dinner engagement somewhere, and I was feeling tired. I had not been in bed before two or three in the morning for a whole week. He came in about dinner time and wanted me to go to the Ritz with him. I refused, and then he said he should stay at home with me. I am quite sure he took too much whisky at dinner, for when he came into the drawing-room afterwards, he reeked of it, and he began to be most objectionable, calling me his 'darling girl' and trying to kiss me. I walked straight away from him and locked myself up in my bedroom.
"Mrs. St. Lucas came home very late, so I determined to tell her about it in the morning. I did not know quite what to do, for she had made all arrangements to go to Vienna, and of course Mr. Buchan was going too, and I suddenly felt sick and disgusted with it all. I hardly slept—worrying through things and not seeing how I could back out of it, or get away from them. Then in the morning I heard from Mrs. St. Lucas' maid when she called me that Mrs. St. Lucas had gone down to Richmond with a party of friends for the day. It was just like her. She left a message saying she would be back early in the evening. I asked the maid if Mr. Buchan were out or in, and she gave me a note from him."
Gentian paused, then with her head held very proudly, she went on:
"If he had apologized for his behaviour, I would very likely have forgiven him on condition he never offended in that way again, but his note was sentimental drivel, just flattering me, and saying that the earth could do better without the sun than he could without me, and he ended by saying he wanted to take me down the river for the day. Would I be kind and come? I sent a message by the maid to say that I was not well and was going to have a quiet day in my room. And then after I had heard him leave the flat, and angrily tell the maid he would not be in till late, it suddenly struck me what I could do!
"In a few minutes I was out of bed and dressed, and had got to the nearest garage. I hired a car without thinking of where I was going. I only knew I must get away from it all. I remembered as I was going through the streets, that Waddy had a married sister in Wiltshire. She came to her funeral, and I thought for the sake of Waddy that she might take me in. And then, just as I came here, I ran into some trees half across the road. I'm not smashed up myself, perhaps it would be better for you and others if I were, but the car is an utter wreck, and I shall have to pay an awful sum at the garage, I suppose. I didn't know what to do, and then I thought of you. And if you can square it up with them now, I'll pay you back by instalments. If it takes a lifetime to do it, I will!"
She glanced up at him feverishly.
Thorold responded at once.
"I'll write to them to-night, they must know, of course. Now what do you want to do?"
There was silence. Gentian leant back against a very hard cushion and looked up at him gravely.
"What do you advise me to do?" she said.
"I think the best thing for you to do is to go to bed and have a good night's rest. You look as if you badly need it. I'll come round after breakfast, and if you feel fit, I'll take you to Mrs. Wharnecliffe, who is really anxious about you. She told me you had left off writing to her."
"Oh, I haven't written to anyone—except perhaps you—and you haven't heard very often, have you?"
"We'll talk over things to-morrow. I do not know whether you want to break entirely with these new friends of yours. But don't worry your head over them. Now I am going. Good night. The landlady says she has a comfortable bedroom for you."
"Oh, what does it matter where I sleep! I'm only a plague and bother to all my friends. Good night. You're like one of your Cornish Tors—I wish—I wish I could be so immovably serene!"
Thorold left her—and acting upon his advice, Gentian went up to her bedroom and got into an old-fashioned fourpost bed with a feather mattress. As she put down her head upon her pillow, she said to herself determinedly:
"I shan't think of Vernon or his sister. I shall wipe them off my mind. I shall only dream and think of that peaceful Cornish valley by the sea, and of Cousin Thor moving about in it trying to shoulder all the people's burdens. He is shouldering mine, and I will leave him to do it. He never fails me."
Sleep came to her very soon in spite of aching wrist and limbs. She met Thorold at the breakfast table the next morning looking much more like herself. And she had recovered her spirits. Meeting his intent gaze she asked him lightly:
"Am I looking an awful guy? I feel as if I have been in a football scrimmage."
"You are very thin," said Thorold gravely. "I suppose it is the result of the life you have been leading—late hours and excitement."
"I have only had six weeks of it, barely that."
"It's long enough to have brought lines to your face which were not there before."
"You're not complimentary. You never are to me. But I have got nervy and cross in London. I always hated towns. I told you so when you came and took Waddy and me away from it. The air is used up, and people get in one's way, and are nasty, and then that rouses nastiness in me."
"Well, now we must talk matters over. You have been too hasty and impetuous in running away like this! Do you want to end all this musical life? Will you be content to settle down quietly away from it all?"
"I never want to get away from music. I could not be happy without a piano or organ, but I never want to see Mr. Buchan again, never. He thinks of nobody but himself, and thinks he can treat me anyhow!"
Gentian's cheeks grew hot and red as she thought of her last interview with Vernon, and of his letter following it.
"I don't know where I am to live," she went on with a plaintive tone in her voice. "I could never go back to the Miss Buchans. Now I see that I treated them badly, for they have been very kind to me. But Mr. Buchan made me write to them and definitely refuse to go back to them. And I can't stay very long with Mrs. Wharnecliffe."
"We'll talk over plans with her," said Thorold hastily. "I think you had better write yourself to both Mr. Buchan and his sister. They have been kind to you. Don't shirk it. You are not a child, and must be able to have the courage of your convictions."
Gentian looked at him with laughter in her eyes.
"You are just the same as ever. Very kind when I am in trouble, but so quick to dictate to me and correct my faults. When I sweep people out of my life, I do it with one good swish of the broom, and never give my reasons. Why should I?"
"I think it would be more courteous and more straightforward if you were to do so."
"What! To tell Mrs. St. Lucas that her brother is detestable to me!"
"No, that is not necessary."
Gentian jumped up from the breakfast table. "I'll write with the greatest pleasure. No one can say that I am afraid of them."
She seized hold of her writing-case, sat down and scribbled off two hasty notes which she handed to Thorold to read before she placed them in their envelopes.
"DEAR MRS. ST. LUCAS,—"I hope you were not anxious about me. I would have explained had you been home. I have had enough of town life. Your brother and I have had words—I don't feel I care about being with him any more. I have played for him at his two big Recitals, and that is all I came up for. I shall never change my mind, but I thank you for your kind hospitality and hope you will enjoy Vienna. Please send my luggage to Mrs. Wharnecliffe and forgive my hasty departure."Yours gratefully,"GENTIAN BRENDON."
"DEAR MR. BUCHAN,—"I feel you will have given your sister an explanation of my disappearance. Please do not think that all girls are alike, and that I understand such talk and behaviour as yours. Your letter is offensive to me. What have I done to make you write in such a style? I hope we shall never meet again. I should have been happier if I had never known you."I can't describe myself anything but a disgusted and disillusioned acquaintance,"GENTIAN BRENDON."
Thorold handed them back to her with a very grave face.
"Well, you don't approve of them?"
"I think you might write to him differently. With a little more dignity. After all, he may have only expressed what he felt for you—you are too severe."
"Oh, men always side with men."
"I am trying to be just and fair," said Thorold. "Give his note back to me."
Gentian tore it to pieces, then dashed off another epistle.
"DEAR MR. BUCHAN,—"I am sorry that I felt obliged to come away from town. Your attitude lately has stopped our friendly intercourse, and I think it wiser to end my visit to your sister."Thanking you for all your past kindness,"Yours sincerely,"GENTIAN BRENDON."
"That is better," was Thorold's comment. "Now we'll post these at once, and get them off our mind. There's a train we can catch in an hour's time. The doctor wants to see you once more. I see him coming along the road now."
"Oh, I don't want doctors," said Gentian impatiently.
But she was persuaded to see him, and he was able to bandage her wrist afresh.
"You want a good rest. Your nerves are overstrained," he told her. "Why will you young people burn the candle at both ends! Then if illness or accident comes, you have no resisting force to overcome them."
"I consider I've weathered through my accident in splendid fashion," she said.
He shook his head.
"Your pulse does not tell me so. Take it quietly. You will feel your bruises for some days, but you have had a wonderful escape."
In an hour's time Gentian was sitting opposite Thorold in a railway carriage.
He talked to her a great deal about Cornwall; of its traditions and folklore and history. He persistently refused to discuss any future plans with her and she was content, for the time being, to live in the present.
Mrs. Wharnecliffe received Gentian with her usual warmth of welcome.
"The very bad penny has returned to you," said Gentian softly and contritely.
"I almost felt it would be so," was Mrs. Wharnecliffe's response. "Your heart was so set on going, that I felt it would be wise to let you go; but I had a presentiment that it would be a failure."
They had had luncheon in the train. Sitting out under the big acacia tree on the lawn, Gentian poured out her story. Mrs. Wharnecliffe smiled at times at her childishness, yet was surprised with her quick comprehension and discernment. She saw that Vernon Buchan had wearied her long before the actual break with him, and she was thankful for it.
Thorold left them alone for a considerable time; then, when he joined them, Mrs. Wharnecliffe said she must finish writing some letters.
"We will have tea out here," she said. "I shall not be long."
Thorold took a garden chair and pulled out his pipe, but he did not light it. He looked at Gentian in a funny, diffident kind of way.
"Now shall we talk plans?" he said.
"Yes," said Gentian with a sigh; "but you'll be very clever if you can find a home for me anywhere, I must work; but what to do, and how to earn money, I do not know. I suppose I must try and give music lessons, but I am not very patient."
Thorold cleared his throat.
"I should like to offer you a home," he said; "but I doubt if you would—"
"Oh, where? Not in Cornwall with you? As your housekeeper?"
He shook his head.
"Oh, no."
Gentian's face fell.
Then he put his pipe in his pocket, and took her slim little hand in his.
"Am I too old and stodgy for you, Gentian? Too dull and commonplace to make you happy? Would you care to come down to Cornwall and make me one of the happiest men there?"
"Are you asking me to marry you?" whispered Gentian, her blue eyes glowing as she looked up into his rather agitated face.
"I am asking you to be my wife," he said very solemnly.
Her face broke up into ripples of laughter. Then a tender softness came over it.
"Cousin Thor, you're a darling! Do you really mean it?"
"Would I joke on such a subject?"
"I never, never thought you'd care enough for me. Why, I like you better than anyone else in the world! You're not asking me out of pity?"
Thorold had drawn her into his arms.
"There's no pity in my heart," he said softly, "only immense love. And it has been there for a long, long time, only I thought I was too old for you."
"You're not a bit old, you're everything that I want. Did you know how I felt about you?"
"Tell me."
But Gentian had suddenly become shy. "I will one day, but not yet."
Mrs. Wharnecliffe, looking out of her morning-room, suddenly rang her bell, and gave orders that tea was to be delayed half an hour. At the end of that time, she walked out to the acacia tree, and received the news with great equanimity.
"And now do you think all your troubles are at an end, Gentian?" she asked, smiling.
"Troubles?" repeated the girl with shining eyes. "Oh, indeed they are! The whole world is changed to me. Now, Mrs. Wharnecliffe, I shall have a right to go off to Cornwall as often as I like, and a right to have my say in his house, and everything that concerns him. I have a right to look after him in every way. How I've longed to do it! I can hardly believe it is true! Just think. An hour ago I had no hope—no certainty or knowledge of what was to become of me—I was lonely and miserable. I had made a mess of my affairs in town—I had offended the Misses Buchan, I felt you and Cousin Thor did not know what to do with me, and looked upon me as an incubus—an obstacle to your peace of mind! I felt he was going back to his mine, and Miss Muir meant to marry him. And here in this peaceful garden I was at the end of everything. When Cousin Thor said he wanted to talk plans, I thought I should be placed in some awful family, or have a stiff, starched chaperon. I haven't had time to think things out yet. I hardly know if I stand on my head or my heels. Do you think he really and truly means what he says? He's the sort that might sacrifice his whole life from compassion or pity on somebody. And that somebody would be me! You know him very well."
But Thorold interrupted:
"Do you doubt my word?" he asked her softly.
And Gentian gazed at him with tender smiling eyes.
"No, you couldn't tell a lie. You've done for yourself, Cousin Thor, for good or evil you have got me now. Mrs. Wharnecliffe, are you in your heart of hearts the least bit sorry for him?"
"I should be, if I did not know you both very intimately. I know he will satisfy all your requirements, Gentian, and it is in your power to satisfy his."
"Here we are, taking all the romance and beauty out of it, and deliberately discussing it in cold blood," said Gentian. "I shall be as bold as brass, and say it out loud: I love him, Mrs. Wharnecliffe, and he loves me. Nothing else matters, nothing. If his mine burst up to-morrow, and we had to live in two rooms on bread and cheese, I would be singing for joy in my heart."
"And now we will have tea," said Mrs. Wharnecliffe, laughing, "and for the present, Gentian, bread and cheese is not your portion. May I say this, that you are a very fortunate girl. I don't think you know what I think of your Cousin Thorold."
"Yes I do—he's a tower of strength. I told him once my ideal of a husband, and he's the only man that has fulfilled it. I want some one like a rock for steadiness and reliability, he must never fail me, never deceive me, never disappoint me. And his soul must be the strongest part of him; for mine is the weakest. And you know his side of the bargain. A scatter-brained, changeable, impetuous, well-meaning, but altogether selfish bubble—just a frothy bubble. But—" here sudden fire leaped to her eyes—"I'll do better, and I'll spend my life in making him happy. He never thinks of himself, he has always thought first of others. I will think first of him."
"You embarrass me," said Thorold.
Mrs. Wharnecliffe gave a turn to the conversation.
"Personalities will now be avoided," she said playfully. "What is more to the purpose is—how long will you be able to stay here, Thorold?"
"I must get back to-morrow night."
They began to discuss plans. But Gentian's glowing animation died down. She sat with clasped hands round her knees, gazing dreamily across the sunny lawn.
She felt that this was the golden hour in her life, and as her eyes wandered up to the deep blue sky above her, she wondered if her faithful friend would be allowed to know the great happiness that had come to her.
THEIR GOLDEN TIME
THOROLD did not leave till late the next afternoon. He took Gentian off for a walk in the morning. And they found a lot to say to each other, though perhaps he was the more silent of the two.
She was rather shy at times.
"You see," she explained to him, "I am not yet accustomed to my new position. And if it seems to turn my head at first, you must make allowances. It's rather a case of King Cophetua and the beggar-maid. Yes, I'm next door to a beggar-maid, and to know that for the rest of my life I shall have no money anxieties is entrancing. Do you think now if the mine goes on well, that you and I could get a couple of good horses and ride about together in Cornwall? You see, I'm at my old trade, begging from the king already!"
Her laughter rang out so merrily that Thorold could not help joining her.
"Yes, we will ride together," he said. "I would rather ride any day than use a car."
"And you'll take that little grey stone house, and let me make it cosy and pretty? What a lot of things there are to be done! Oh, I wonder if I shall make you a good wife? You like the old-fashioned sort, don't you? A wife who'll always stay at home, and take care of the house, and welcome her husband back with smiles of peace and looks of love. I'm afraid I shall find it very difficult, but I mean to do everything you want. Oh, Cousin Thor, you don't know how I worship you!"
"We'll drop the 'cousin,' shall we?"
"Yes, of course. But I've a lot of secret pet names for you. Would you like to hear them? Thorold is so grave and stiff. I called you the Buffer first, because you always came between me and difficulties, and then I thought of you as 'Mr. Ready to help,' and then the 'Limpet's Rock'—I was the limpet, of course—and you were also 'the Universal Improver.'"
"Oh, spare me," said Thorold with a little laugh; "I know I have been very down on you for many things, but you have taken my scoldings like an angel, and I don't feel like scolding any more."
Then in a graver tone, he began to talk to her about the life they would have together, of the responsibilities that would come to them, and of the opportunities they would have of helping those around them.
Gentian listened with eager delight.
"I shall, of course, do all I can. I do think seriously, you know, and I'm full now of noble resolves and desires. You will have to lift me up away from earth when you are soaring heavenwards yourself. And when I drop down with a thud into the mire, you will have to pick me up again, and start me afresh."
Their talk veered from grave to gay, but when they returned to the house, Mrs. Wharnecliffe asked them if they had settled the day for their marriage.
"You have nothing to wait for," she said; "I am sure you know each other through and through. I mean to keep Gentian with me until her trousseau will be ready, and you will have to get your house in order, Thorold. Don't think I want to hurry you, but I'm going to take Phil to the Riviera in November, and should love to see you settled comfortably for the winter, before we go."
"I have touched upon that crucial point," said Thorold.
"Yes," said Gentian, a little shyly; "and I'm going to leave it to him—I want just a little time to take it all in, and to think over it, but when he wants me, I'll be ready."
"Then why not fix a day towards the end of October? That will leave a good three months," suggested Mrs. Wharnecliffe.
And both Thorold and Gentian signified their assent.
The hours of that day passed too quickly for Gentian. She clung to Thorold when his time of departure came.
"You are quite sure you haven't made a mistake?" she said, laying her head on his shoulder with a little happy sigh; "you won't let Miss Muir make you think I am too young and giddy to make you a good wife? I shall do awful things sometimes, I always do, but I shan't do them on purpose. And I have some pride, and I'll show Miss Muir that I can keep house, and dispense hospitality, and be as good a hostess as she is herself."
"I am not afraid that my future wife will lack either dignity or grace," said Thorold. "My darling, I have made many mistakes in my life, but I am quite certain that I am not making one now."
"And we'll write and write and write to each other, till we meet again," said Gentian; "and if you're very long away, I shall get into my car and come tearing down to see you—I can always do that."
She parted from him with smiles and misty eyes, and when he had gone, came to Mrs. Wharnecliffe.
"Oh, I'm the happiest girl in the world! Did you know he liked me? Did you know I liked him? I'm thanking God with all my heart for bringing such joy into my life. I shall love Him so much more, and shall serve Him so much better now. I always think that Cousin Thor is an uncalendared saint; and living with him will, of course, make me a much better character. We won't keep our engagement a secret. There's one person I should like to tell soon, and that is Sir Gilbert. He is one of my greatest friends next to you."
"We'll drive over and see him to-morrow," said Mrs. Wharnecliffe. "I have had a pretty good idea, for some time past, that your feelings towards Thorold were undergoing a change. You did not care for him at first, did you?"
"Well, no," admitted Gentian; "for he was too masterful. Isn't it funny? I don't mind that a bit now. I like it in him—I don't want my own way, I want his."
"Ah," said Mrs. Wharnecliffe, "that is the right kind of love, that gives more than it takes. I hope you'll always feel like that, my dear child."
"I have really grown older," said Gentian thoughtfully, "in many ways. Dear Waddy's illness taught me a good deal. I remember I felt when she left me, that I would never smile again, my heart was quite cold and dead. Cousin Thor did me good, when he came over to see me. And I see now how right he was. Trouble does work for good if we take it in the right way. I was very rebellious and impatient at first, and I have been most awfully depressed lately—not seeing my future one little bit. Somehow I never dreamt that Cousin Thor would or could care for me. I felt very inclined to marry Jim, or anyone, and make the best of a bad job. Fancy if I had! It doesn't bear thinking about."
Mrs. Wharnecliffe let her talk on. She was a very sympathetic listener, and was too pleased with the match to be over-critical; otherwise she might have checked the girl's egotistical talk.
In a few days the news became known.
Sir Gilbert received it with his serene smile.
"I think," he said, "I must congratulate you most. There are few men nowadays so quietly helpful and so selfless as Thorold Holt."
"Yes," said Gentian; "everybody loves him. I suppose you think I am not half good enough for him. He ought to have a sweet, dignified, queenly woman, serene and calm, and instead, he has me."
"He has a little person who is learning fast to control her likes and dislikes, to think nothing of herself, and everything of those she loves."
"I am trying to arrive at that, but am not there yet," said Gentian humbly.
Miss Horatia arrived over one afternoon to offer her congratulations.
"I felt you would not come and see us," she said in her blunt downright fashion; "so I came to see you. We are not annoyed with you, though I am sure you think we are. Anne and I know our nephew's way so well. That was why we did not want you to meet him. He takes violent fancies to girls, and then slips away from them, before he definitely commits himself."
"He didn't treat me like that," said Gentian, with great dignity. "It was I who ran away from him. But I was too hasty and impulsive, Miss Horatia. I was beside myself with excitement in London, and when I was told I could make quite a nice sum by accompanying people, I thought I should like to take it up as a profession."
"And then what happened?" inquired Miss Horatia.
"Well," said Gentian hesitating, "Mr. Vernon would not leave me alone. He wearied me. I had to do everything with him, and go everywhere with him, and I got sick of it, and of the people I had to meet. I am not made for towns. I always think some of us are made for the country and some for towns, don't you think so? And then I simply fled, and I never want to see London again. It all tired me to death, and made my nerves all come to the top of my skin. Do you know the feeling?"
"I could have told you what it would be like, but you would not have believed me."
"I am ashamed of myself. How is Miss Anne? Would she see me if I came over and asked her forgiveness for leaving her so suddenly, after all her kindness to me?"
"She'll like to see you any day. And so you're really engaged to Thorold Holt? I thought you considered him an antiquated prig and meddler."
"I thought he was everything that was horrid when I first knew him," said Gentian laughing; "but everybody who really gets to know him, and watches his life, must adore him, Miss Horatia!"
Miss Horatia laughed.
"Then that is your role now! Well—you can pin your faith and love on Thorold and never be disillusioned. I'll say that, and I've known him for a good many years. You're a lucky young woman, and I congratulate you with all my heart."
"Thank you. Every one tells me that. And they nearly say 'you're not half enough good for him,' their eyes and corners of their mouths say it, if their tongues don't! But it's quite true. I'm not good enough, or clever enough, or steady enough. But somebody said once that people who live together get like each other, so I'm hoping to get like him in time."
"You would do well to be shaken into a bag together," said Miss Horatia. "I dare say you'll tone down, and he'll brisk up. Now what I want to ask you is this: Are you going to get a chance of continuing your riding after you're married?"
"Oh, I hope so. Cousin Thor says he will have horses. How is my dear Sophy?"
"She's eating her head off in the stable. Are you staying here? If so, come over and exercise her. I think I may give my old hunter to you as a wedding present."
"Oh, Miss Horatia! After the way I have behaved! Why, you're a perfect angel!"
Impulsive Gentian seized hold of Miss Horatia's hands, and in her pretty foreign fashion which had not altogether left her, lifted them to her lips and kissed them.
Miss Horatia drew her hands away with a little laugh.
"You didn't offend me. Young people must go their own way nowadays. I couldn't, when I was a girl—more's the pity. And you have gone up several pegs in my estimation by your appreciation of Thorold."
"Appreciation!" gasped Gentian. "Why I would die for him! Nobody realizes what I feel for him!"
The next day she went over to see Miss Anne, who received her kindly, but a little stiffly.
But when Gentian told her contritely how sorry and ashamed she was for having left them in such haste, she was graciously forgiven.
"My sister and I have talked it over. We knew you were under our nephew's influence, for he wrote to us about you and told us plainly that he would not let you come back to us. You made a great mistake in going up to town in the first instance, but that you would do. However, all's well that ends well, and I think that Mrs. Wharnecliffe and anyone who cares about you, must feel very thankful for your engagement."
"Yes," murmured Gentian; "I'm sure you think it is more than I deserve. But it means a fresh start, and a new life, and a glorious future for me. And I'm going to try and turn into a dowdy, virtuous, old-fashioned wife, so that every one will say: 'How her marriage has improved her! I never should have dreamt that that undisciplined, wilful, giddy girl could have altered so!' I hope you'll say so, dear Miss Anne—oh, do give me your blessing."
Miss Anne could no more resist Gentian when she adopted her winning, persuasive tone than anyone else. She promised she would come to her wedding if she were able, and would be glad to see her at any time.
And then for the next month Mrs. Wharnecliffe kept her very busy over her trousseau. She wanted to take Gentian for a few weeks to town to shop there, but the girl shrank from it, and said she would much rather get her clothes made locally.
"You don't like a place that has made you unhappy. London was not a friend to me. I think she is one of the cities in the world which is pleasant for the workers and business people and the gay idlers, but I'm a betwixt and a between, I'm not exactly a drone, and I'm not a busy bee. I'm just a lover of sunshine and peace and quiet country. Don't smile like that, Mrs. Wharnecliffe. I'm altering a lot as I grow older. I shall love the quietness of that grey Cornish house, and you can't say I don't love the country here. And I'm not going to be a smart, fashionable woman. Thorold loves me in blue, he says he wants me to dress in nothing else, so that's easy. And we're not going to have a smart wedding."
"But I shall insist upon a white wedding dress," said Mrs. Wharnecliffe firmly, "and you must have one or two nice evening frocks and some of them not blue."
Gentian was smiling happily, with her thoughts far away. Thorold had told her that the picture of her standing in the doorway of that dingy lodging-house in London had never left his memory.
"You were dressed in a rich blue gown with turquoise beads, and somehow you reminded me with your sad, sweet little face and big blue eyes of a young madonna. You might have stepped out of some old Italian picture."
"And then you discovered I was only an imp," Gentian had said to him.
She was thinking of this now and of how Thorold had drawn her into his arms and murmured:
"My little blue Gentian—I want you always dressed in blue."
Mrs. Wharnecliffe smiled as she noted her abstraction of mind. She remembered her own courting days, and made due allowance for Gentian's moods.
Time slipped along rapidly; and then they went for another day or two down to Cornwall.
This time Frances Muir was away, and Gentian was relieved to hear it.
The house was in the decorators' hands, and work being pushed along as rapidly as it could be in one of the leisurable counties of England.
Thorold and Gentian wandered over the house by themselves.
"How I longed to furnish it when I was here before. And now we are doing it," laughed Gentian. "Now you must promise not to laugh at me if I ask you for one thing. There is a little empty room at the end of the passage. It looks out west. I want a bit of the house all to myself, and I want this room. I shall watch the sunsets from it, and in the winter I shall see the daylight die away later than in any other room."
"You shall have the room most certainly. It can be your boudoir."
"No, no, it is going to be my Sanctuary. When I was in Italy, I knew somebody—she was only a girl—one of my own friends—but she had in her beautiful home one little room where she used to go to tell her beads and pray before a silver crucifix. I am not a Roman Catholic. I don't want a crucifix or beads, but I shall have a prie-dieu chair just before the window, and I shall have my Bible on a blue cushion upon the wide window-ledge, and when I'm in one of my passions—or when I feel worried or depressed—I shall run away there and be quiet, and then shall come out with peace in my heart. Sir Gilbert and you have taught me to take all my troubles to God. I do it as a habit now. But I love to have a little quiet closet as the Bible says, and be shut in there alone."
"My darling," said Thorold, bending over her and kissing rather a wistful little face, "you shall indeed have your Sanctuary. I only wish it were big enough for a small organ, for I think you would like one there. But I must tell you, I am going to present the little church here with one. I don't think you and I could stand that harmonium every Sunday. I have talked with Dick about it, and he is very pleased. You will be able to run into church whenever you like, and if you would sometimes play for the Sunday services, I expect everyone would be delighted."
Gentian's face became radiant.
"An organ! Oh, how lovely. It is the one thing I have felt unhappy about, leaving dear St. Anselm's and my dear, dear organ! Why, Thorold, there's everything we want now in this little village."
And Thorold made response in his dry and whimsical way:
"I am easily contented. Organs and rooms, and all such common things only form a background to my centre. And my centre is to be kept well and happy, so I am now going to lock this house up before she gets overtired and take her off to the Rectory to lunch."
* * * * *
Many people gathered together to see Gentian married in St. Anselm's Church. And yet it was a very quiet wedding. Neither of Thorold's young brothers was present. Gentian was much relieved to hear of Godwin's engagement to his Admiral's daughter, before her own engagement to his brother was broken to him.
It was a bright, frosty October morning. Sir Gilbert gave the bride away, and afterwards played the wedding march himself as she and her bridegroom came down the aisle. Through the whole of the service Gentian seemed very composed and quiet, but her head drooped and she never raised her eyes.
Thorold had felt her hand tremble as he put the ring upon her finger.
She never once looked at him till they were in the car driving from the church to Oakberry Hall, and then when Thorold put his arm round her, she glanced up at him through a mist of tears.
"It's just joy," she whispered to him, "and relief that I did not take Jim in a hurry and lose you! And it's a little bit frightening, isn't it, getting married? We've neither of us done it before, and if you ever were to be disgusted and ashamed of me, what should I do? Now, don't stop me! I feel that everybody thinks me too young and foolish to be your wife, but time will put that right, won't it?"
Thorold's protests made her smile.
"And now," she said, "just call me Mrs. Holt, so that I may hear how it sounds."
Afterwards, at Mrs. Wharnecliffe's reception, her quiet grace and dignity were noted by all.
The rector's wife was much impressed by it.
"She has improved," she said to her husband; "since Miss Ward's death she has been much steadier. I could have wished that Mr. Holt had done better, but of course, in the circumstances, one does not wonder that he has married her. He considered that he had cut her out of her relation's money."
But it was not pity that shone in Thorold's grey eyes. He had had a grey life, and the golden sunshine that now flooded his heart almost dazed him. Gentian had long ago stolen into his heart; he knew that she would be enshrined there for the rest of his life. They went off to Italy for a fortnight and then came straight home to Cornwall.
It had been an ideal honeymoon. Thorold looked years younger, and Gentian had developed in many ways. She was changing from a pretty girl into a beautiful woman. Sometimes her grave dignity with strangers made her husband wonder. Her explanation was very simple:
"I am not going to be that contemptible thing, a child-wife! People shan't curl their lips, and go away and pity you. When we're quite alone, I'll have my fun, but not in public!"
They came to their grey manor house as dusk was falling, but there were lights and fire to welcome them, and Frances Muir had found them a delightful Cornish couple of the name of Tiddy. Mr. Tiddy opened the door and made smart salute. He had been a sailor, and thought the British Navy the most important creation on the face of the earth. Mrs. Tiddy was clean and rosy and very small, but she moved about at lightning pace and never wasted time in talk. Her spouse was the one with the tongue, as she told Gentian when talking about him.
"I knew afore us were wedded what a clacker 'e be, an' sez I, two tongues wull soon raise the wind, one agen t'uther, zo zilent be I from this time forth, an' so I be. But I'll say this for Jerry, 'e du wark so well as talk."
Most of Thorold's furniture had been brought to the house. The square hall, with its thick rugs underfoot, and thick curtains to the doors and windows, and blazing log fire, looked a very different place from when Gentian had first seen it. Whilst Thorold was giving directions about their luggage, she ran upstairs, peeped into her big, bright bedroom, where flowered chintzes and another bright fire awaited her, and then down the passage she went to her Sanctuary. There was no fire here, but she turned on the electric light, which had been installed all over the house, and looked around her, well pleased with the result of her furnishing.
The walls were white, the woodwork dark oak. A rich blue carpet was on the floor, and blue velvet curtains were drawn across the windows. The prie-dieu chair, with its blue cushion, was before the window; there were a writing-table, an easy chair and a small book-case filled with devotional books. Two pictures only were hung upon the walls. One depicted Christ walking with his two disciples to Emmaus, the other Daniel kneeling before his open window.
Gentian drew aside the curtains. In the distance she saw a line of silver sea. A young moon was already shining in the sky. She gazed for a moment up into the infinite blue above her, then turned and, kneeling upon her chair, bowed her head.
"O God," she murmured, "I thank Thee for my husband and home. Bless us in it. Make me a good wife, and help me to be a better Christian, for Jesus Christ's sake—Amen."
A moment later and she was hanging upon her husband's arm, listening with laughing eyes to Tiddy's talk.
"Missus an' me will do 'ee praper, esfay us will. A've bin to sea wi' the highest in the land, an' they be most alway single gents, and vrom puttin' in they dashed little studs in dinner starched shirts to cleanin' patent boots wi' a shine on they vit to see wan's face tu, a've waited on 'em, an' got nought but praise. An' missus an' me can well attend tu the wants of a couple like 'ee, for a du lay that man an' maid, be they king or tinker folk, when they virst be wed, be so ower taken up wi' each on 'em, that they be main easy to be pleased."
Thorold laughed and drew Gentian into the smoking-room.
"He won't find us such fools as he hopes. We dream our dreams, but I for one can be very practical, and I think my wife can be so too."
"I want to be everything that I ought to be," said Gentian earnestly, then she laughingly laid her head on her husband's shoulder.
"But there is one thing I can't and won't be, and that is a long-faced, melancholy Christian. They ought to be exterminated, for they make others hate religion."
"I hope I'm not one of that sort," said Thorold smiling.
"You? Never. You're grave sometimes, but the twinkle in your eyes always saves you. Oh, Thorold, do you think we shall always be as happy as we are now?"
And Thorold, looking at the radiant young face turned towards him, had no misgivings that life should rob her of her joyousness. He only softly repeated some lines which he had read:
"The heart that trusts for ever sings,And feels as light as it had wings;A well of peace within it springs,Come good or ill,Whate'er to-day, to-morrow brings.It is His Will."
FINIS