Buckingham Palace, October 19th.I was so sad at parting with you yesterday. I could not half thank you for all your love and kindness during those weeks. But you know how deeply I feel it; how truly grateful I am to you; how happy and contented I am to be allowed to be near you as in old days. Darling Mama, once more, thousand thanks for all and for every thing!The journey went quite well, and I am not particularly tired.
Buckingham Palace, October 19th.
I was so sad at parting with you yesterday. I could not half thank you for all your love and kindness during those weeks. But you know how deeply I feel it; how truly grateful I am to you; how happy and contented I am to be allowed to be near you as in old days. Darling Mama, once more, thousand thanks for all and for every thing!
The journey went quite well, and I am not particularly tired.
Buckingham Palace, November 19th.Thousand thanks for your dear letter received this morning! I feel leaving dear England, as always, though the pleasure of being near the dear children again is very great.Let me thank you once more from my heart, darling Mama, for all your great kindness, and for having enabled me to do what was thought necessary and best. I return so much stronger and better than I came, in every way—refreshed by the pleasant stay in dear Balmoral with you, and then much better for the time here. I feel morally refreshed, too, with the entire change, the many interests to be met with here, which is always so beneficial, and will help me in every way when I get back to Darmstadt. All this I have to thank you for, and do so most warmly.Louis, who, as you know, is full of love and affection for you, is very grateful for your kind words, and has likewise derived profit and enjoyment from his stay in England.* * * My color and strength have so much returned, that I do not doubt being well again this winter.I went with Dean Stanley to see Mr. Carlyle, who was most interesting, and talked for nearly an hour. Had I had time, I would have written down the conversation. The Dean said he would try and do so.With Louise I visited Mr. Motley also, who in his way is equally interesting, and has a great charm. * * *
Buckingham Palace, November 19th.
Thousand thanks for your dear letter received this morning! I feel leaving dear England, as always, though the pleasure of being near the dear children again is very great.
Let me thank you once more from my heart, darling Mama, for all your great kindness, and for having enabled me to do what was thought necessary and best. I return so much stronger and better than I came, in every way—refreshed by the pleasant stay in dear Balmoral with you, and then much better for the time here. I feel morally refreshed, too, with the entire change, the many interests to be met with here, which is always so beneficial, and will help me in every way when I get back to Darmstadt. All this I have to thank you for, and do so most warmly.
Louis, who, as you know, is full of love and affection for you, is very grateful for your kind words, and has likewise derived profit and enjoyment from his stay in England.
* * * My color and strength have so much returned, that I do not doubt being well again this winter.
I went with Dean Stanley to see Mr. Carlyle, who was most interesting, and talked for nearly an hour. Had I had time, I would have written down the conversation. The Dean said he would try and do so.
With Louise I visited Mr. Motley also, who in his way is equally interesting, and has a great charm. * * *
Darmstadt, November 26th.Many thanks for your last letter from Balmoral, received yesterday morning! Iknowyou feel leaving the dear place, but without going away there is noWiedersehen[meeting again]. The happiness of our meeting with the dear children was very great on all sides—they eat me up!They had made wreaths over the doors, and had no end of things to tell me. We arrived at three, and there was not a moment’s rest till they were all in bed, and I had heard the different prayers and hymns of the six, with all the little different confidences they had to make. My heart was full of joy and gratitude at being with them once more, and I prayed God to make me fit to be their real friend and stay as long as they require me, and to have the insight into their different characters to guide them aright, and to understand their different wants and feelings. This is so difficult always.Victoria is immensely grown, and her figure is forming. She is changing so much—beginning to leave the child and grow into the girl. I hear she has been good and desirous of doing what is right; and she has more to contend with than Ella, therefore double merit in any thing she overcomes, and any self-sacrifice she makes.Ernie is very well, and his birthday was a great delight. Sweet little May is enchanting,—“myweetheart,” as she calls me. Aliky is very handsome and dear.
Darmstadt, November 26th.
Many thanks for your last letter from Balmoral, received yesterday morning! Iknowyou feel leaving the dear place, but without going away there is noWiedersehen[meeting again]. The happiness of our meeting with the dear children was very great on all sides—they eat me up!
They had made wreaths over the doors, and had no end of things to tell me. We arrived at three, and there was not a moment’s rest till they were all in bed, and I had heard the different prayers and hymns of the six, with all the little different confidences they had to make. My heart was full of joy and gratitude at being with them once more, and I prayed God to make me fit to be their real friend and stay as long as they require me, and to have the insight into their different characters to guide them aright, and to understand their different wants and feelings. This is so difficult always.
Victoria is immensely grown, and her figure is forming. She is changing so much—beginning to leave the child and grow into the girl. I hear she has been good and desirous of doing what is right; and she has more to contend with than Ella, therefore double merit in any thing she overcomes, and any self-sacrifice she makes.
Ernie is very well, and his birthday was a great delight. Sweet little May is enchanting,—“myweetheart,” as she calls me. Aliky is very handsome and dear.
Darmstadt, December 12th.I see this letter will just arrive on the 14th—daynever to be forgotten! How deeply it is graven in my heart—with letters of blood; for the pain of losinghim, and of witnessing your grief, was as sharp as any thing any child can go through for its beloved parents. Yet God’s mercy is to be found through all, and one learns to say “Thy will be done,” hard though it is. * * *
Darmstadt, December 12th.
I see this letter will just arrive on the 14th—daynever to be forgotten! How deeply it is graven in my heart—with letters of blood; for the pain of losinghim, and of witnessing your grief, was as sharp as any thing any child can go through for its beloved parents. Yet God’s mercy is to be found through all, and one learns to say “Thy will be done,” hard though it is. * * *
Thehealth of Prince Charles of Hesse (father of Prince Louis) had for some time past given cause for great anxiety. He had always suffered from violent headaches and a delicate throat. On the evening of the 11th of March he was seized with erysipelas, and died peacefully on the 20th. The Princess shared the grief of her mother-in-law and family most truly; for Prince Charles, though outwardly shy and retiring, was a man of great cultivation and refinement, and had made himself beloved by all who knew him. He was buried in the Mausoleum at the Rosenhöhe on the 24th of March. The Grand Duke, who was deeply affected by his brother’s death, and all the family were present.
A month had scarcely passed since Prince Charles’ death, when the Grand Duke himself was attacked by serious illness at Seeheim, one of his summer residences, near Darmstadt, and died on the 13th of June at the age of seventy-one.
Prince Louis was the next heir, and ascended the throne as Grand Duke Louis IV.
The total change of circumstances, the heavy duties and responsibilities of her new position, came most unexpectedly upon the Princess, and she scarcely felt herself equal to them. With her well-known conscientiousness and high feeling of duty it was not surprising that they weighed heavily upon her, more especially as her health had of late become very delicate. Still, the hope of being able to carry out many a plan for the welfare of her adopted country encouraged her greatly.
After the official receptions held by the Grand Duke and Grand Duchess were over, they left Darmstadt for the quiet little watering-place of Houlgate, in Normandy. The Grand Duke was only able to accompany the Grand Duchess as far as Metz, but he followed her later on with the children. The rest and quiet were good for them all; and, apparently much improved in health, the Grand Duchess returned for the first time as “mother of the country” [Landesmutter] to Darmstadt. Her reception was of the warmest and most enthusiastic nature, which she took as a good omen for the future.
The Emperor of Germany and the Crown Prince visited Darmstadt at the end of September, for the purpose of assisting at the cavalry manœuvres, to the great satisfaction of the country.
The change in Princess Alice’s position in no wise affected her relations to her many charitable institutions, though she had, of course, many new responsibilities thrown upon her. Her constant endeavorwas to be just and free from prejudice, to recognize what was good, no matter where, and to promote and further it to the best of her power.
The Grand Duke and Grand Duchess saw much of the Crown Prince and Crown Princess of Germany during the latter part of the year, as they were living at Wiesbaden.
Fräulein Louise Büchner, who had been for ten years so intimately connected with the Grand Duchess, not only as working with her for the good of others, but also by ties of the truest friendship, died on the 28th of November. Her death caused a gap which was sorely felt. A few days before her death, when she was already confined to her bed, she received a letter from the Grand Duchess herself, on the occasion of the tenth anniversary of the opening of the “Alice Bazaar,” thanking her for all she had done.
The Grand Duchess had caused many of the pamphlets written by Miss Octavia Hill to be translated, in the hopes of encouraging in Darmstadt the authorities, and those at the head of private undertakings, to further exertions for improving the condition of the poor.
Whilst in England she had become acquainted with Miss Octavia Hill, “the warm-hearted friend of the poor,” and had visited with her many of the poorer parts of London. She felt the sincerest admiration and respect for Miss Hill, and entirely shared her view, “that we must become the friendsof the poor to be their benefactors.” The Grand Duchess did not wish to copy exactly in Germany what Miss Hill had done in London: but she hoped that the knowledge of what had been done in other places would be an incentive to work in the same direction.
At the beginning of this year the Grand Duchess had visited in strictest incognito the worst houses (in sanitary respects) in Mayence, and determined to make a plan for the erection of new dwellings for the working classes there.
Darmstadt, January 1st.* * * How beautifully Max Müller’s letter[133]is written and expressed, and how touchingly and truly he puts the point of view on which we all should learn to stand. To become again pure as children, with a child’s faith and trust—there where our human intellect willeverstand still!I have been reading some of Robertson’s sermons again, and I think his view of Christianity one of the truest, warmest, and most beautiful I know. * * *
Darmstadt, January 1st.
* * * How beautifully Max Müller’s letter[133]is written and expressed, and how touchingly and truly he puts the point of view on which we all should learn to stand. To become again pure as children, with a child’s faith and trust—there where our human intellect willeverstand still!
I have been reading some of Robertson’s sermons again, and I think his view of Christianity one of the truest, warmest, and most beautiful I know. * * *
Darmstadt, March 23d.Thank you so much for your dear and sympathizing letter. These have been most painful—most distressing days—so harrowing.The recollections of 1861, of dear Frittie’s death, when my dear father-in-law was so tender and kind, were painfully vivid. My mother-in-law’s resignation and touching goodness, doing all that she could during the illness and since for all arrangements, is very beautiful!The poor sons gave way to bursts of tears during those agonizing hours; yet they held their father alternately with me, and were quiet and helpful for their mother and for him, just as their simple, quiet natures teach them. I begged Bäuerlein to write to you meanwhile. I am feeling so exhausted, and there is so much to do, and we are always going from one house to the other.It was heart-rending from Monday morn till Tuesday eve to see the painful alteration in the dear well-known features augmenting from hour to hour, though I believe he did not suffer latterly. He was not conscious, unless spoken to, or called very directly.My mother-in-law never left his bedside day or night, and we were only a few hours absent on Monday night. Before we went home she called our names distinctly to him as we kissed him, and he seemed to notice it; then she knelt down, and distinctly, but choked with tears, prayed the Lord’s Prayer for him, calling him gently.The next day at six we were there again, and till half past six in the evening never left the bedside. She repeated occasionally, as long as she thought he might hear, a short verse—sotouching! and once said: “Bist Du traurig? es ist ja nicht auf lange, dann sind wir wieder zusammen!” [“Art thou sad? It is not for long, and then we shall be together again”] kissing and stroking his hands. It was very distressing.When all was over we four were close to her, and she threw herself on him, and then clasped her sons to her heart with words of such grief as you so well understand!Early the next morning we went with her to hisroom. He lay on his bed, very peaceful, in his uniform. Louis had clasped the hands together when he died, and I arranged flowers on the bed and in the room round him.There is a terrible deal to do and to arrange, and many people come, and we are much with my poor mother-in-law. Yesterday we went for the last time to see the remains of what had been so precious. She read a “Lied” [a hymn], and then kissed him so long, and took with us the last look. Yesterday evening the coffin was closed in presence of the sons.We are going to the Rosenhöhe [the Mausoleum] now, before going to Louis’ mother, to put things straight there, and see if one can get by dear Frittie—it issosmall.The three brothers are dreadfully upset, but able to arrange and see after what is necessary. Aunt Marie [the Empress of Russia] wanted to come, and is in terrible distress; she loved that brother beyond any thing. In her last letter to my mother-in-law she says: “Ich habe solche Sehnsucht nach dem alten Bruder” [“I have such a yearning after my old brother”].His was a singularly delicate-minded, pure, true, unselfish nature, so full of consideration for others, so kind. My tears flow incessantly, for I loved him very dearly.My dear mother-in-law has such a broken, ruined existence now—all turned round him! She knows where to find strength and comfort—it will not fail her. * * *
Darmstadt, March 23d.
Thank you so much for your dear and sympathizing letter. These have been most painful—most distressing days—so harrowing.
The recollections of 1861, of dear Frittie’s death, when my dear father-in-law was so tender and kind, were painfully vivid. My mother-in-law’s resignation and touching goodness, doing all that she could during the illness and since for all arrangements, is very beautiful!
The poor sons gave way to bursts of tears during those agonizing hours; yet they held their father alternately with me, and were quiet and helpful for their mother and for him, just as their simple, quiet natures teach them. I begged Bäuerlein to write to you meanwhile. I am feeling so exhausted, and there is so much to do, and we are always going from one house to the other.
It was heart-rending from Monday morn till Tuesday eve to see the painful alteration in the dear well-known features augmenting from hour to hour, though I believe he did not suffer latterly. He was not conscious, unless spoken to, or called very directly.
My mother-in-law never left his bedside day or night, and we were only a few hours absent on Monday night. Before we went home she called our names distinctly to him as we kissed him, and he seemed to notice it; then she knelt down, and distinctly, but choked with tears, prayed the Lord’s Prayer for him, calling him gently.
The next day at six we were there again, and till half past six in the evening never left the bedside. She repeated occasionally, as long as she thought he might hear, a short verse—sotouching! and once said: “Bist Du traurig? es ist ja nicht auf lange, dann sind wir wieder zusammen!” [“Art thou sad? It is not for long, and then we shall be together again”] kissing and stroking his hands. It was very distressing.
When all was over we four were close to her, and she threw herself on him, and then clasped her sons to her heart with words of such grief as you so well understand!
Early the next morning we went with her to hisroom. He lay on his bed, very peaceful, in his uniform. Louis had clasped the hands together when he died, and I arranged flowers on the bed and in the room round him.
There is a terrible deal to do and to arrange, and many people come, and we are much with my poor mother-in-law. Yesterday we went for the last time to see the remains of what had been so precious. She read a “Lied” [a hymn], and then kissed him so long, and took with us the last look. Yesterday evening the coffin was closed in presence of the sons.
We are going to the Rosenhöhe [the Mausoleum] now, before going to Louis’ mother, to put things straight there, and see if one can get by dear Frittie—it issosmall.
The three brothers are dreadfully upset, but able to arrange and see after what is necessary. Aunt Marie [the Empress of Russia] wanted to come, and is in terrible distress; she loved that brother beyond any thing. In her last letter to my mother-in-law she says: “Ich habe solche Sehnsucht nach dem alten Bruder” [“I have such a yearning after my old brother”].
His was a singularly delicate-minded, pure, true, unselfish nature, so full of consideration for others, so kind. My tears flow incessantly, for I loved him very dearly.
My dear mother-in-law has such a broken, ruined existence now—all turned round him! She knows where to find strength and comfort—it will not fail her. * * *
Darmstadt, June 7th.* * * We are going through a dreadful ordeal. The whole of Monday and Monday night, with a heat beyond words, dreading the worst. Now therehas been a slight rally.[134]Whether it will continue to-morrow is doubtful. He is always conscious, makes his little jokes, but the pulse is very low and intermits. I was there early this morning with Louis. * * *The questions, long discussions between Louis and some people, as to complication and difficulty of every kind that will at once fall upon us, are really dreadful, and I so unfit just now! The confusion will be dreadful. * * *I am so dreading every thing, and above all the responsibility of being the first in every thing, and people are notbienveillant.I shall send you news whenever I can, but I am so worn out. I shall not be able to do so much myself.I know your thoughts and wishes are with us at so hard a time. God grant we may do all aright! * * *
Darmstadt, June 7th.
* * * We are going through a dreadful ordeal. The whole of Monday and Monday night, with a heat beyond words, dreading the worst. Now therehas been a slight rally.[134]Whether it will continue to-morrow is doubtful. He is always conscious, makes his little jokes, but the pulse is very low and intermits. I was there early this morning with Louis. * * *
The questions, long discussions between Louis and some people, as to complication and difficulty of every kind that will at once fall upon us, are really dreadful, and I so unfit just now! The confusion will be dreadful. * * *
I am so dreading every thing, and above all the responsibility of being the first in every thing, and people are notbienveillant.
I shall send you news whenever I can, but I am so worn out. I shall not be able to do so much myself.
I know your thoughts and wishes are with us at so hard a time. God grant we may do all aright! * * *
June 7th.Going to Seeheim, as great weakness has come on. Am much tired by all that lies before us, and not feeling well.
June 7th.
Going to Seeheim, as great weakness has come on. Am much tired by all that lies before us, and not feeling well.
Seeheim, 13th.Dear Uncle Louis is no more. We arrived too late.
Seeheim, 13th.
Dear Uncle Louis is no more. We arrived too late.
Darmstadt, 6.20 o’clock, 13th.Such press of business and decisions. Feel very tired.
Darmstadt, 6.20 o’clock, 13th.
Such press of business and decisions. Feel very tired.
15th.We are both so over-tired; the press of business and decisions is so wearing, with the new responsibility.
15th.
We are both so over-tired; the press of business and decisions is so wearing, with the new responsibility.
18th.Last ceremony over! All went off well, and was very moving.Alice.
18th.
Last ceremony over! All went off well, and was very moving.
Alice.
Darmstadt, June 19th.Only two words of thanks from both of us for your kind wishes and letters! Christian and Colonel Gardiner bring you news of every thing that has been and is still going on. But we are overwhelmed, over-tired, and the heat is getting very bad again.* * * Will tell you what a very difficult position we are in. It is too dreadful to think that I am forced to leave Louis in a few weeks under present circumstances, but, if he wishes to keep me at all, I must leave every thing and this heat for a time. These next weeks here will be very anxious and difficult. God grant we may do the right things!
Darmstadt, June 19th.
Only two words of thanks from both of us for your kind wishes and letters! Christian and Colonel Gardiner bring you news of every thing that has been and is still going on. But we are overwhelmed, over-tired, and the heat is getting very bad again.
* * * Will tell you what a very difficult position we are in. It is too dreadful to think that I am forced to leave Louis in a few weeks under present circumstances, but, if he wishes to keep me at all, I must leave every thing and this heat for a time. These next weeks here will be very anxious and difficult. God grant we may do the right things!
June 28th.* * * To have to go away just now, when the refreshment of family life is so doubly pleasant to Louis after his work, I am too sorry for. If I were only better; if I only thought that I shall have the chance of rest, and what is necessary to regain my health! Now it will be more difficult than ever, and I see Louis has the fear, which I also have, that I shall not hold out very long.
June 28th.
* * * To have to go away just now, when the refreshment of family life is so doubly pleasant to Louis after his work, I am too sorry for. If I were only better; if I only thought that I shall have the chance of rest, and what is necessary to regain my health! Now it will be more difficult than ever, and I see Louis has the fear, which I also have, that I shall not hold out very long.
July 15th.* * * I leave on Tuesday, but stop on the way. The children go direct and join me in Paris, when we go on together on Friday or Saturday to Houlgate. The trains don’t fit, and one has some way to drive from Trouville.
July 15th.
* * * I leave on Tuesday, but stop on the way. The children go direct and join me in Paris, when we go on together on Friday or Saturday to Houlgate. The trains don’t fit, and one has some way to drive from Trouville.
Houlgate, July 25th.* * * This place is quite charming—realcountry, so green, so picturesque—a beautiful coast; the nicest sea-place I have been at yet. Our house is “wee” for so many, and the first days it was very noisy; and it was so dirty. The maids and nurses had to scrub and sweep; the one French housemaid was not up to it. All is better now, and quite comfortable enough. The air is doing me good, and the complete change. I have bathed twice, and the sea revives me.I follow as eagerly as any in England the advance of the Russians, and with cordial dislike.Theycan never be redressers of wrongs or promoters of civilization and Christianity. What I fear is, even if they don’t take Constantinople, and make no large demands as the price of their victories now, the declaration of the independence of Bulgaria will make that country to them in future what Roumania has been for Russia now, and therefore in twenty years hence they will get all they want, unless the other Powers at this late hour can bring about a change. It is bad for England, for Austria, for Germany, if this Russian Slav element should preponderate in Europe; and the other countries must sooner or later act against this in self-preservation.What do the friends of the “Atrocity Meetings” say now? How difficult it has been made for the Government through them, and how blind they have been! All this must be a constant worry and anxiety for you!The children are so happy here—the sea does them such good. I am very glad I brought them.
Houlgate, July 25th.
* * * This place is quite charming—realcountry, so green, so picturesque—a beautiful coast; the nicest sea-place I have been at yet. Our house is “wee” for so many, and the first days it was very noisy; and it was so dirty. The maids and nurses had to scrub and sweep; the one French housemaid was not up to it. All is better now, and quite comfortable enough. The air is doing me good, and the complete change. I have bathed twice, and the sea revives me.
I follow as eagerly as any in England the advance of the Russians, and with cordial dislike.Theycan never be redressers of wrongs or promoters of civilization and Christianity. What I fear is, even if they don’t take Constantinople, and make no large demands as the price of their victories now, the declaration of the independence of Bulgaria will make that country to them in future what Roumania has been for Russia now, and therefore in twenty years hence they will get all they want, unless the other Powers at this late hour can bring about a change. It is bad for England, for Austria, for Germany, if this Russian Slav element should preponderate in Europe; and the other countries must sooner or later act against this in self-preservation.
What do the friends of the “Atrocity Meetings” say now? How difficult it has been made for the Government through them, and how blind they have been! All this must be a constant worry and anxiety for you!
The children are so happy here—the sea does them such good. I am very glad I brought them.
Houlgate, July 28th.* * * Though we have rain off and on, still the weather is very pleasant, and we are all of us charmed with the place, and the beautiful, picturesque, fertile country. The life is so pleasant—real country—which I have never yet found at any bathing-place abroad yet. I have bathed every other day—swim, and it does me good. I feel it already. Ella is getting her color back, and the little ones look much better.I send you the last photos done of the children; Ella’s is not favorable, nor Irène’s, but all in all they are a pretty set. May has not such fat cheeks in reality; still it is very dear. The two little girlies are so sweet, so dear, merry, and nice. I don’t know which is dearest, they are both so captivating.I have been to an old tumble-down church at Dives—close by here—where William the Conqueror is said to have been before starting for England. His name and those of all his followers are inscribed there—names of so many families now existing in England. It was very interesting.
Houlgate, July 28th.
* * * Though we have rain off and on, still the weather is very pleasant, and we are all of us charmed with the place, and the beautiful, picturesque, fertile country. The life is so pleasant—real country—which I have never yet found at any bathing-place abroad yet. I have bathed every other day—swim, and it does me good. I feel it already. Ella is getting her color back, and the little ones look much better.
I send you the last photos done of the children; Ella’s is not favorable, nor Irène’s, but all in all they are a pretty set. May has not such fat cheeks in reality; still it is very dear. The two little girlies are so sweet, so dear, merry, and nice. I don’t know which is dearest, they are both so captivating.
I have been to an old tumble-down church at Dives—close by here—where William the Conqueror is said to have been before starting for England. His name and those of all his followers are inscribed there—names of so many families now existing in England. It was very interesting.
August 22d.* * * How difficult it is to know one’s children well; to develop and train the characters according to their different peculiarities and requirements! * * *
August 22d.
* * * How difficult it is to know one’s children well; to develop and train the characters according to their different peculiarities and requirements! * * *
Darmstadt, September 9th.* * * I must tell you now, how very heartily and enthusiastically the whole population, high and low, received us yesterday. It was entirely spontaneous, and, as such, of course, so very pleasing. * * * I was really touched, for it rained, and yet all were so joyous—flags out, bells ringing, people bombarding us with beautiful nosegays; all the schools out, even the higher ones, the girls all dressed in white. The Kriegerverein, Louis’ old soldiers, singing, etc. In the evening all the Gesangvereine joined together and sang under our windows.We are very glad to be at home again, and, please God, with earnest will and thought for others, we together shall in our different ways be able to live for the good of the people entrusted to our care! May God’s blessing rest on our joint endeavors to do the best, and may we meet with kindness and forbearance where we fall short of our duties.
Darmstadt, September 9th.
* * * I must tell you now, how very heartily and enthusiastically the whole population, high and low, received us yesterday. It was entirely spontaneous, and, as such, of course, so very pleasing. * * * I was really touched, for it rained, and yet all were so joyous—flags out, bells ringing, people bombarding us with beautiful nosegays; all the schools out, even the higher ones, the girls all dressed in white. The Kriegerverein, Louis’ old soldiers, singing, etc. In the evening all the Gesangvereine joined together and sang under our windows.
We are very glad to be at home again, and, please God, with earnest will and thought for others, we together shall in our different ways be able to live for the good of the people entrusted to our care! May God’s blessing rest on our joint endeavors to do the best, and may we meet with kindness and forbearance where we fall short of our duties.
Darmstadt, October 30th.* * * I had to receive sixty-five ladies—amongst them my nurses—and some doctors from here and other towns, all belonging to my Nursing Society, which has now existed ten years. Then I was at the opening of my Industrial Girls’ School, where girls from all parts of the country come, and which is a great success. I started it two years ago. On Sunday I took the children to hear the Sunday-school, which interested them very much.I have been doing too much lately, though, and my nerves are beginning to feel the strain, for sleep and appetite are no longer good. Too much is demanded of one; and I have to do with so many things. It is more than my strength can stand in the long run. * * *
Darmstadt, October 30th.
* * * I had to receive sixty-five ladies—amongst them my nurses—and some doctors from here and other towns, all belonging to my Nursing Society, which has now existed ten years. Then I was at the opening of my Industrial Girls’ School, where girls from all parts of the country come, and which is a great success. I started it two years ago. On Sunday I took the children to hear the Sunday-school, which interested them very much.
I have been doing too much lately, though, and my nerves are beginning to feel the strain, for sleep and appetite are no longer good. Too much is demanded of one; and I have to do with so many things. It is more than my strength can stand in the long run. * * *
December 13th.For to-morrow, as ever, my tenderest sympathy! Time shows but more and more what we all lost in beloved Papa; and the older I grow, the more people I know, the more the remembrance of him shines bright as a star of purer lustre than any I have ever known. May but a small share of his light fall on some of us, who have remained so far beneath him, so little worthy of such a father! We can but admire,reverence, long to imitate, and yet not approach near to what he was.We are going with the children to-day to Wiesbaden until Saturday; and I mean to tell Vicky that she had better give up the hope of my being able to come for the wedding.[135]I could not do it. I only trust the why will be understood. Do write to the dear Empress about it when next you write.Howsorry I am to be absent at a moment when, as sister and a German Sovereign’s wife, I should be there; but the doctor would not hear of it, so I gave it up. * * *
December 13th.
For to-morrow, as ever, my tenderest sympathy! Time shows but more and more what we all lost in beloved Papa; and the older I grow, the more people I know, the more the remembrance of him shines bright as a star of purer lustre than any I have ever known. May but a small share of his light fall on some of us, who have remained so far beneath him, so little worthy of such a father! We can but admire,reverence, long to imitate, and yet not approach near to what he was.
We are going with the children to-day to Wiesbaden until Saturday; and I mean to tell Vicky that she had better give up the hope of my being able to come for the wedding.[135]I could not do it. I only trust the why will be understood. Do write to the dear Empress about it when next you write.Howsorry I am to be absent at a moment when, as sister and a German Sovereign’s wife, I should be there; but the doctor would not hear of it, so I gave it up. * * *
Darmstadt, December 21st.* * * You say all that happened after the dreadful 14th is effaced from your memory. How well I can imagine that! I remember saying my utmost to Sir Charles Phipps in remonstrance to your being wished to leave Windsor—it was so cruel, so very wrong. Uncle Leopold insisted; it all came from him, and he was alarmed lest you should fall ill.Howyou suffered was dreadful to witness; never shall I forget what I went through for you then; it tore my heart in pieces; and my own grief was so great too. Louis thought I would not hold to my engagement then any more—for my heart was too filled with beloved, adored Papa, and with your anguish, to have room or wish for other thoughts.God is very merciful in letting time temper the sharpness of one’s grief, and letting sorrow find its natural place in our hearts, without withdrawing us from life!
Darmstadt, December 21st.
* * * You say all that happened after the dreadful 14th is effaced from your memory. How well I can imagine that! I remember saying my utmost to Sir Charles Phipps in remonstrance to your being wished to leave Windsor—it was so cruel, so very wrong. Uncle Leopold insisted; it all came from him, and he was alarmed lest you should fall ill.
Howyou suffered was dreadful to witness; never shall I forget what I went through for you then; it tore my heart in pieces; and my own grief was so great too. Louis thought I would not hold to my engagement then any more—for my heart was too filled with beloved, adored Papa, and with your anguish, to have room or wish for other thoughts.
God is very merciful in letting time temper the sharpness of one’s grief, and letting sorrow find its natural place in our hearts, without withdrawing us from life!
“Life is serious—a journey to another end.” (December 12, 1874.)
“Life is serious—a journey to another end.” (December 12, 1874.)
THE state of the Grand Duchess’ health prevented her from accompanying the Grand Duke to Berlin on the occasion of the marriages of Princess Charlotte of Prussia (eldest daughter of the Crown Prince and Princess of Germany) to the Hereditary Prince of Saxe-Meiningen, and of Princess Elizabeth of Prussia (sister to the Duchess of Connaught) to the Hereditary Grand Duke of Oldenburg. Although she was unable to go out much into society, or to take an active part in social gayeties, her interest and sympathy were unabated, particularly in all matters concerning art and science. She received many guests, and Prince William of Prussia (then studying at Bonn) often visited her.
The celebrated portrait painter Heinrich von Angeli came to Darmstadt in the spring to paint a family picture of the Grand Duke and Grand Duchess and their children by command of the Queen of England. Princess Alice greatly enjoyed his acquaintance, and was charmed as well by his musical talent as by his wonderful genius in painting.Angeli’s picture of Princess Alice was the last ever painted of her.
The repeated attempts on the life of the old Emperor of Germany affected the Grand Duchess very nearly, as from her childhood she had ever been greatly attached to him.
The Grand Duke and Grand Duchess with their children spent the summer months of this year at Eastbourne. Sea-bathing and sea-air had again been recommended as necessary.
The Grand Duke had to return to Darmstadt soon after their arrival at Eastbourne, but toward the end of the stay there he rejoined them.
The whole family visited the Queen at Osborne.
Although the Grand Duchess had, during all her former visits to England, shown her lively personal interest in all charitable institutions in London, visiting many herself, she seems on the occasion of this, her last, visit to her beloved native land, to have taken a more than ordinary interest in these matters, and to have also gone minutely into the subject of the exertions which were being made to relieve the pressing wants of the poor.
The Grand Duchess had scarcely arrived at Eastbourne (an eye-witness tells us), when she at once made enquiries as to the condition of the poorer parts of that town, and determined to visit them herself. She loved to wander about that part of Eastbourne which is inhabited by the fishing population. She often entered their cottages, visiting thesick, and showing her sympathy to all. The visits to the Sunday-school were a great pleasure to her. The Princess often remarked, “How much good such instruction must do!”
She attended divine service at a church some little way off, not because the service was particularly attractive, but because the church and its congregation needed support and help.
Amongst those good works which from year to year had specially occupied her were the Refuges and Penitentiaries for those poor women and girls who most need our help. Much had been done in this way in England, and the Albion Home at Brighton, founded and managed solely by Mrs. Murray Vicars, had proved of the greatest service and blessing. The Grand Duchess invited Mrs. Vicars to come and see her at Eastbourne, and tell herself about her work, and showed her, when she came, the greatest sympathy and kindness, entering with the warmest interest into all details of the working of the Home.
Before leaving Eastbourne the Grand Duchess went incognita to Brighton, and paid a private visit to the Albion Home. “I only come as one woman to visit another” were the Princess Alice’s own words, when Mrs. Vicars begged her to be allowed to tell the poor Penitents who their visitor was.
The Grand Duchess was greatly impressed, after her visit to the Home, by Mrs. Vicars’ wonderful power and practical knowledge, and by her gentle,loving way toward those poor girls; and this in a great measure induced her, with the Grand Duke’s consent, to become Patroness of the Albion Home. At first, when asked by Mrs. Vicars to become the Patroness, she had refused to do so; but, having reconsidered the subject, she wrote to her the following letter from Darmstadt:
New Palace, Darmstadt.Dear Mrs. Vicars:—I have returned from visiting the Home so convinced of your excellent management of it in every respect, that, if you still feel my becoming Patroness of the Home (and of the Ladies’ Association connected with it) can further the good and noble work, I am most willing to comply with your request. The spirit of true, loving, Christian sympathy in which the work was begun by you, and with which it is carried out; the cheerfulness you impart, the motherly solicitude you offer to those struggling to return to a better life, cannot fail to restore in a great measure that feeling of self-respect so necessary to those voluntarily seeking once more a virtuous life, and by so doing regaining the respect of their fellow-creatures. “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto Me.” In this spirit may the Home, as well as the Association connected with it, continue its good work. My entire sympathy and good wishes will ever be with it.Ever yours truly,Alice.
New Palace, Darmstadt.
Dear Mrs. Vicars:—I have returned from visiting the Home so convinced of your excellent management of it in every respect, that, if you still feel my becoming Patroness of the Home (and of the Ladies’ Association connected with it) can further the good and noble work, I am most willing to comply with your request. The spirit of true, loving, Christian sympathy in which the work was begun by you, and with which it is carried out; the cheerfulness you impart, the motherly solicitude you offer to those struggling to return to a better life, cannot fail to restore in a great measure that feeling of self-respect so necessary to those voluntarily seeking once more a virtuous life, and by so doing regaining the respect of their fellow-creatures. “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto Me.” In this spirit may the Home, as well as the Association connected with it, continue its good work. My entire sympathy and good wishes will ever be with it.
Ever yours truly,Alice.
After the Grand Duchess’ return to Darmstadt, she devoted herself with redoubled energy to all her charitable institutions; but, alas! she felt more andmore that her bodily strength was no longer equal to her exertions.
In the autumn she had the happiness of seeing several of her family at Darmstadt, the last of them being her brother, Prince Leopold.
Darmstadt, January 26th.Though I have no letter, and expect none at such a moment, still I must send you a few lines to tell you how constantly I think of you, and of my own beloved and adored country. The anxiety you must be going through, and the feelings you must experience, I share with my whole heart. * * *God grant it may be possible to do the right thing, for it is late, and the complication is dreadful!I have barely any thoughts for any thing else; and the Opposition seems to me to have been more wrong in its country’s interest, and to have done her a greater harm than can ever be redressed. It is a serious, awful moment for Sovereign, country, and Government; and in your position none have to go through what you have—and after all so alone!I hope your health bears up under the anxiety.
Darmstadt, January 26th.
Though I have no letter, and expect none at such a moment, still I must send you a few lines to tell you how constantly I think of you, and of my own beloved and adored country. The anxiety you must be going through, and the feelings you must experience, I share with my whole heart. * * *
God grant it may be possible to do the right thing, for it is late, and the complication is dreadful!
I have barely any thoughts for any thing else; and the Opposition seems to me to have been more wrong in its country’s interest, and to have done her a greater harm than can ever be redressed. It is a serious, awful moment for Sovereign, country, and Government; and in your position none have to go through what you have—and after all so alone!
I hope your health bears up under the anxiety.
April 9th.* * * Angeli has arrived, and will begin at once. We thought Ernie and Ella—Victoria is too big, though she is the eldest and ought to be in the picture; she would be too preponderant. Angeli is quite lost in admiration of Aliky and May, who are, I must say myself, such a lovely little pair as one does not often see. He will begin our heads to-morrow. * * *
April 9th.
* * * Angeli has arrived, and will begin at once. We thought Ernie and Ella—Victoria is too big, though she is the eldest and ought to be in the picture; she would be too preponderant. Angeli is quite lost in admiration of Aliky and May, who are, I must say myself, such a lovely little pair as one does not often see. He will begin our heads to-morrow. * * *
Darmstadt, November 6th.* * * I am but very middling, and leading avery quiet life, which is an absolute necessity. It is so depressing to be like this. But our home life is always pleasant—never dull, however quiet. Only a feeling of weariness and incapacity is in itself a trial.
Darmstadt, November 6th.
* * * I am but very middling, and leading avery quiet life, which is an absolute necessity. It is so depressing to be like this. But our home life is always pleasant—never dull, however quiet. Only a feeling of weariness and incapacity is in itself a trial.
On the 8th of November Princess Victoria was suddenly attacked with diphtheria. How and where she caught the illness remains unexplained. The Grand Duchess, always so courageous in illness, and fearing none, had, however, always had a great horror of diphtheria. Princess Victoria was at once isolated from her family and the others in the house; but, alas! to no purpose. Princess Alice superintended the nursing, aided by the nurses and the Lady Superintendent of her hospital. The terrible anxiety of the poor mother during that illness is best described by her own telegrams and letters to the Queen.
November 8th.Victoria has diphtheria since this morning. The fever is high. I am so anxious.
November 8th.
Victoria has diphtheria since this morning. The fever is high. I am so anxious.
November 10th.Victoria is out of danger.
November 10th.
Victoria is out of danger.
November 12th.This night my precious Aliky has been taken ill.
November 12th.
This night my precious Aliky has been taken ill.
Darmstadt, November 12th.This is dreadful! my sweet, precious Aliky so ill! At three this morning Orchie called me, saying she thought the child was feverish; complaining of her throat. I went over to her, looked into her throat,and there were not only spots, but a thick covering on each side of her throat of that horrid white membrane. I got the steam inhaler, with chlorate of potash for her at once, but she was very unhappy, poor little thing. We sent for the doctor, who lives close by, and who saw at once that it was a severe case. We have put her upstairs near Victoria, who is quite convalescent, and have fumigated the nursery to try and spare May and the others. It is aterribleanxiety; it is such an acute, and often fatal, illness. * * * Victoria has been graciously preserved; may God preserve these [the younger ones] also in His mercy! My heart is sore; and I am so anxious.
Darmstadt, November 12th.
This is dreadful! my sweet, precious Aliky so ill! At three this morning Orchie called me, saying she thought the child was feverish; complaining of her throat. I went over to her, looked into her throat,and there were not only spots, but a thick covering on each side of her throat of that horrid white membrane. I got the steam inhaler, with chlorate of potash for her at once, but she was very unhappy, poor little thing. We sent for the doctor, who lives close by, and who saw at once that it was a severe case. We have put her upstairs near Victoria, who is quite convalescent, and have fumigated the nursery to try and spare May and the others. It is aterribleanxiety; it is such an acute, and often fatal, illness. * * * Victoria has been graciously preserved; may God preserve these [the younger ones] also in His mercy! My heart is sore; and I am so anxious.
Telegram.November 13th.Aliky tolerable. Darling May very ill; fever so high. Irène has got it too. I am miserable; such fear for the sweet little one!
Telegram.
November 13th.
Aliky tolerable. Darling May very ill; fever so high. Irène has got it too. I am miserable; such fear for the sweet little one!
On the 14th of November Prince Ernest and the Grand Duke were attacked with diphtheria, so that, up to that time, Princess Elizabeth only had escaped the infection. She was sent to her Grandmother’s, Princess Charles of Hesse’s palace.
Telegram.November 15th.My precious May no better; suffers so much. I am in such horrible fear. Irène and Ernie fever less. Ernie’s throat very swelled. Louis no worse; almost no spots. Aliky recovering.
Telegram.
November 15th.
My precious May no better; suffers so much. I am in such horrible fear. Irène and Ernie fever less. Ernie’s throat very swelled. Louis no worse; almost no spots. Aliky recovering.
Evening.Darling May’s state unchanged; heart-rending. Louis’ fever and illness on the increase. The others, as one could expect; all severe cases. May’s most alarming.
Evening.
Darling May’s state unchanged; heart-rending. Louis’ fever and illness on the increase. The others, as one could expect; all severe cases. May’s most alarming.
The sympathy with the Grand Duchess in her great anxiety was universal. In many of the churches special services were held, praying for the recovery of that dearly beloved family. The well-known suffering state of the Grand Duchess’ own health, so sorely tried at this moment, caused the gravest fears to be entertained on her own account.
On the morning of the 16th of November sweet little Princess “May”—the Princess’ sunshine, as she ever called her—was taken from her doting parents. The Grand Duchess telegraphed as follows to her mother:
November 16th.* * * Our sweet little one is taken. Broke it to my poor Louis this morning; he is better; Ernie very, very ill. In great anguish.
November 16th.
* * * Our sweet little one is taken. Broke it to my poor Louis this morning; he is better; Ernie very, very ill. In great anguish.
November 16th; evening.The pain is beyond words, but “God’s will be done!” Our precious Ernie is still a source of such terrible fear. The others, though not safe, better.
November 16th; evening.
The pain is beyond words, but “God’s will be done!” Our precious Ernie is still a source of such terrible fear. The others, though not safe, better.
November 17th.Ernie decidedly better; full of gratitude.
November 17th.
Ernie decidedly better; full of gratitude.
November 18th.My patients getting better; hope soon to have them better. Last painful parting at three o’clock.
November 18th.
My patients getting better; hope soon to have them better. Last painful parting at three o’clock.
The coffin had to be closed very soon. It was entirely covered with flowers. The Grand Duchess quietly entered the room where it had been placed. She knelt down near it, pressing a corner of thepall to her lips; then she rose, and the funeral service began.
When it was over, she cast one long, loving look at the coffin which hid her darling from her. She then left the room and slowly walked up-stairs. At the top of the stairs she knelt down, and taking hold of the golden balustrade, looked into the mirror opposite to her to watch the little coffin being taken out of the house. She was marvellously calm; only long-drawn sighs escaped her.
When all had left the palace, she went to the Grand Duke, who was to be kept in ignorance of all that was going on. The Grand Duchess had herself arranged every detail of the funeral.
Telegram.November 19th.The continued suspense almost beyond endurance. Ernie thought he was going to die in the night, and was in a dreadful state for some hours. Louis very nervous, too; but they are not worse. The six cases have been one worse than the other.
Telegram.
November 19th.
The continued suspense almost beyond endurance. Ernie thought he was going to die in the night, and was in a dreadful state for some hours. Louis very nervous, too; but they are not worse. The six cases have been one worse than the other.
Later, November 19th.Ernie had a relapse, and our fears are increased. I am in an agony between hope and fear.
Later, November 19th.
Ernie had a relapse, and our fears are increased. I am in an agony between hope and fear.
The Grand Duchess desired her warmest thanks to be expressed to the country for their heart-felt sympathy.
On the 25th of November the Grand Duke was able for the first time to leave his bed for a few hours, and on the 6th of December he and Prince Ernest drove out for the first time, in a shut carriage.
It was on this day that the Grand Duchess wrote for the last time to the Queen.
November 19th.Beloved Mama:—Tender thanks for your dear, dear letter, soothing and comforting!Our sweet May waits for us up there, and is not going through our agony, thank God! Her bright, happy, sunshiny existence has been a bright spot in our lives—but oh! how short! I don’t touch on the anguish that fills me, for God in His mercy helps me, and it must be borne; but to-day, again, the fear and anxiety for Ernie is still greater. This is quite agonizing to me;howI pray that he may be spared to me!His voice is so thick; new membranes have appeared. He cries at times so bitterly, but he is gayer just now.To a mother’s heart, who would spare her children every pain, to have to witness what I have, and am still doing, knowing all these precious lives hanging on a thread, is an agony barely to be conceived, save by those who have gone through it.* * * Your letter says so truly all I feel. I can but say, in all one’s agony there is a mercy and a peace of God, which even now He has let me feel. * * *P.S.—I mean to try and drive a little this afternoon. I shall go out with Orchie. Of my six children, since a week none more about me, and not my husband. It is like a very awful dream to me.
November 19th.
Beloved Mama:—Tender thanks for your dear, dear letter, soothing and comforting!
Our sweet May waits for us up there, and is not going through our agony, thank God! Her bright, happy, sunshiny existence has been a bright spot in our lives—but oh! how short! I don’t touch on the anguish that fills me, for God in His mercy helps me, and it must be borne; but to-day, again, the fear and anxiety for Ernie is still greater. This is quite agonizing to me;howI pray that he may be spared to me!
His voice is so thick; new membranes have appeared. He cries at times so bitterly, but he is gayer just now.
To a mother’s heart, who would spare her children every pain, to have to witness what I have, and am still doing, knowing all these precious lives hanging on a thread, is an agony barely to be conceived, save by those who have gone through it.
* * * Your letter says so truly all I feel. I can but say, in all one’s agony there is a mercy and a peace of God, which even now He has let me feel. * * *
P.S.—I mean to try and drive a little this afternoon. I shall go out with Orchie. Of my six children, since a week none more about me, and not my husband. It is like a very awful dream to me.
November 22d.Beloved Mama:—Many thanks for your dear letter, and for all the expressions of sympathy shown by so many! I amverygrateful for it.Dear Ernie having been preserved through the greatest danger is a source of such gratitude! These have been terrible days! He sent a book to May this morning. It made me almost sick to smile at the dear boy. But he must be spared yet awhile what to him will be such a sorrow.For myself, darling Mama, God has given me comfort and help in all this trouble, and I am sure His Spirit will remain near us in the trials to come! Great sympathy, such as all show, is a balm; but I am very tired, and the pain is often very great; but pain can be turned into a blessing, and I pray this may be so. * * *When alone, I rest; and writing even is a physical exertion. Those around me have spared me all they could, but one must bear the greater weight one’s self.May God spare you all future sorrow, and give you the peace which He alone can give!P.S.—I finish these lines at my dear Louis’ bed. He thanks you so much for your dear, loving sympathy. Thank God, he is doing well. But the pain they have all gone through in their poor throats has beenawful. The doctors and nurses—eight! for they have changed day and night, and had such constant attendance—have beenallI could wish.Your loving child,Alice.
November 22d.
Beloved Mama:—Many thanks for your dear letter, and for all the expressions of sympathy shown by so many! I amverygrateful for it.
Dear Ernie having been preserved through the greatest danger is a source of such gratitude! These have been terrible days! He sent a book to May this morning. It made me almost sick to smile at the dear boy. But he must be spared yet awhile what to him will be such a sorrow.
For myself, darling Mama, God has given me comfort and help in all this trouble, and I am sure His Spirit will remain near us in the trials to come! Great sympathy, such as all show, is a balm; but I am very tired, and the pain is often very great; but pain can be turned into a blessing, and I pray this may be so. * * *
When alone, I rest; and writing even is a physical exertion. Those around me have spared me all they could, but one must bear the greater weight one’s self.
May God spare you all future sorrow, and give you the peace which He alone can give!
P.S.—I finish these lines at my dear Louis’ bed. He thanks you so much for your dear, loving sympathy. Thank God, he is doing well. But the pain they have all gone through in their poor throats has beenawful. The doctors and nurses—eight! for they have changed day and night, and had such constant attendance—have beenallI could wish.
Your loving child,Alice.
Darmstadt, December 1st.* * * Every one shows great sympathy, I hear, everywhere. * * * All classes have shown a great attachment to us personally, and to the House, and amongst the common people—it goes home to them that our position does not separate us so very far from them, and that in death,danger, and sorrow the palace and the hut are visited alike.So many deep and solemn lessons one learns in these times, and I believe all works together for good for those who believe in God. * * *
Darmstadt, December 1st.
* * * Every one shows great sympathy, I hear, everywhere. * * * All classes have shown a great attachment to us personally, and to the House, and amongst the common people—it goes home to them that our position does not separate us so very far from them, and that in death,danger, and sorrow the palace and the hut are visited alike.
So many deep and solemn lessons one learns in these times, and I believe all works together for good for those who believe in God. * * *
December 2d.So many pangs and pains come, and must yet for years to come. Still gratitude for those left issostrong, and indeed resignation entire and complete to a higher will; and so we all feel together, and encourage each other. Life isnotendless in this world, God be praised! There is much joy—but oh! so much trial and pain; and, as the number of those one loves increases in Heaven, it makes our passage easier—andhomeis there!Ever your loving child,Alice.
December 2d.
So many pangs and pains come, and must yet for years to come. Still gratitude for those left issostrong, and indeed resignation entire and complete to a higher will; and so we all feel together, and encourage each other. Life isnotendless in this world, God be praised! There is much joy—but oh! so much trial and pain; and, as the number of those one loves increases in Heaven, it makes our passage easier—andhomeis there!
Ever your loving child,Alice.
December 6th.Louis and Ernie will go out in a shut carriage to-day, though it rains—but it is warm. Louis’ strength returnssoslowly. Of course he shuns the return to life, where our loss will be more realized; to him, shut off so long, it is more like a dream. I am so thankful they were all spared the dreadful realities I went through—and alone. My cup seemed very full, and yet I have been enabled to bear it. But daily I must struggle and pray for resignation; it is a cruel pain and one that will last years, as I know but too well.Ever your loving child,A.
December 6th.
Louis and Ernie will go out in a shut carriage to-day, though it rains—but it is warm. Louis’ strength returnssoslowly. Of course he shuns the return to life, where our loss will be more realized; to him, shut off so long, it is more like a dream. I am so thankful they were all spared the dreadful realities I went through—and alone. My cup seemed very full, and yet I have been enabled to bear it. But daily I must struggle and pray for resignation; it is a cruel pain and one that will last years, as I know but too well.
Ever your loving child,A.
Amongst the last letters from the Grand Duchess is one written on the 6th of December, instructing Prince Ernest’s new tutor in his duties. PrincessAlice wished her son to become a truly good man in every sense of the word—upright, truthful, courageous, unselfish, ready to help others, modest and retiring. She wished his tutor to encourage in him fear of God and submission to His will, a high sense of duty, a feeling of honor and of truth.
It had been settled that as soon as the convalescent patients were able to be moved, the whole Grand Ducal family should go to Heidelberg for thorough change of air.
On the 7th of December the Grand Duchess went to the railway station to see the Duchess of Edinburgh, who was passing through Darmstadt on her way to England. That night she first complained of feeling ill; and on the following morning the unmistakable symptoms of diphtheria had begun to show themselves. It is supposed that she must have taken the infection, when one day, in her grief and despair, she had laid her head on her sick husband’s pillow. During the first day of her illness she settled several things, and gave various orders in case of her death. Still it was evident that she thought she would recover.
She bore her great sufferings with wonderful patience, and was most obedient to every thing the doctors ordered her to do, however painful and trying. Those were terrible days! How much so to her is apparent from short sentences which from time to time she wrote down on slips of paper. Every thing was done to alleviate her sufferings—every thing to encourage her. The high fever which set in at the commencement of the illness did not decrease on the third day as in the previous cases, though her sufferings were perhaps not so great. At times she was very restless and distressed. In the night of the 12th of December she gave many directions to her mother-in-law, and to her lady-in-waiting. At times, too, she spoke in the most touching manner about her household, also enquiring kindly after poor and sick people in the town. Then followed hours of great prostration.
On the morning of the 13th of December the doctors could no longer disguise from the Grand Duke that their efforts to save that beloved life were in vain. As the danger increased, the Grand Duchess expressed herself as feeling better. She received her mother-in-law that afternoon in the most affectionate manner; also saw her lady-in-waiting; and when the Grand Duke entered her room her joy was most evident. She even read two letters—the last one being from her mother. After some hours of heavy sleep she woke perfectly conscious and took some nourishment. She then composed herself to rest, saying: “Now I will go to sleep again.” And out of this sleep she woke no more.
Shortly after 1A.M.on the 14th of December a change took place which left no doubt to those around that that precious life was fast ebbing away. When, a little later on, Princess Charles went into the Grand Duke’s room, who was then asleep, shehad left the Grand Duchess perfectly unconscious. It required no words of his mother’s to break the news to him.
At half-past eight that morning Princess Alice died peacefully, murmuring to herself, like a child going to sleep: “From Friday to Saturday—four weeks—May—dear Papa——!”
It was exactly to the day four weeks since Princess May’s death, and seventeen years since the death of the Prince Consort. On the following Tuesday evening, the 17th of December, after a solemn service held by the English chaplain, the remains of the beloved Princess were quietly removed from her own palace to the chapel in the Grand Ducal Castle. The next day, amidst the universal grief of high and low, the coffin was placed in the Mausoleum at the Rosenhöhe. Her brothers, the Prince of Wales and Prince Leopold, were present.
A beautiful recumbent monument by Boehm, representing the Princess holding Princess May in her arms, is now placed in the Mausoleum over the spot where she rests.
[Text decoration not available.]
WE must leave it to those who have read the preceding pages—mere chronicle of facts as they are, to form their own idea of the character and personality of the Princess.
Still, the disjointed manner in which the whole subject has been treated seems to call for a few more additional remarks.
The world has long been acquainted with the outward appearance of the Princess—with the delicacy of her features, the sweetness of their expression, and the dignity and gracefulness of her every movement. Though so perfectly natural and simple in manner, she never forgot that she was a Princess. While she knew how to encourage and draw out those who, from timidity, kept themselves in the background, she also understood how, in a moment, to check any thing like forwardness, and, where necessary, to silence presumption by a glance.
Her conversation was bright and animated, passing rapidly from topic to topic, but always directed to subjects worth talking about. There was a certain distinction in the way she dealt even with minormatters of daily life. She spoke German with a slightly foreign accent, but with a power of idiomatic expression that seldom failed her, and showed how thoroughly she had mastered the genius of the language.
Occupation was a necessity to her; she could not understand how any one could be idle. When at home, she always had some needlework at hand ready to take up.
The Princess was singularly free from all prejudice, and always endeavored to judge people according to their worth.
It sometimes happened that she offended people by her independent views, but she never knowingly hurt anybody’s feelings; innate generosity was a striking trait in her character.
Frank and sincere herself to an unusual degree, she always encouraged others to be the same, and was most tolerant of well-grounded contradiction.
In times of trouble and danger, when so much was expected of her, her powers seemed to expand. It was in such moments that she really showed the master-spirit, which remains calm and self-possessed when all around lose their heads.
The Princess took the deepest interest in the personal welfare of all around her, even to the humblest of her servants. This interest was shown by many small services, seldom rendered to their servants by masters or mistresses.
With all her appreciation of the purely theoreticaland scientific aspect of things, she was naturally of a very practical turn of mind. She had few equals in her love and talent for organizing, for communicating her own ideas to those around her, and in turn being animated by the views of others. Thus it was that she expected not a little from those about her, and might almost have given the impression of a very restless nature, had not this activity been counterbalanced by an unceasing perseverance in carrying out and adhering to what she had once undertaken.
To become acquainted with great men of every profession, whether scholars, artists, or men of science, was a real pleasure to her. She loved to gain an insight into their thoughts and views, and proved herself a very German in her admiration and appreciation of serious scientific work.
Among the arts, music and painting were those she loved the best, and cultivated the most. In both she was far ahead of even distinguished amateurs. Her drawing was free, firm, and bold; she had a decided talent for composition, and was rich in inventive power. She had a wonderful eye for color, and was especially successful in water-colors.
She was an excellent musician, and played extremely well. Few could read and understand difficult pieces at sight as the Princess did. In music, as in all the arts, her taste was rather severe. She had a great predilection for the classical school. Bach, Beethoven, and Schumann, Schubert, Mendelssohn, and Brahams were her especial favorites.
In theatrical performances she disliked empty show and splendor—the mere decoration of pieces for the love of decoration. She believed in the ennobling influence of the representation of sound classical works.
Her whole being mentally and morally was concentrated in her children and their education, and in this she showed herself to be a thorough woman. She endeavored to make them feel the worth and greatness of both the nations to which they belonged by birth. She was apt to be more severe in her criticisms of the German mode of education and of moral training than of that of her own country. That this should have been so is easily to be explained. In Germany her life and work were not easy, and she knew that it would take time before her endeavors for the welfare of her adopted country met with recognition, whilst in England, the country of her birth and her affection, to which she clung with ever-increasing reverence and devotion, she knew she was ever becoming more beloved.
Still, being so thoroughly English as she was, we cannot but say that much that was best and finest in her character must be considered as the inheritance of her German father. A nature such as the Princess’ could not help coming in contact with many deep and serious questions, in which religion alone could help her.
The traces of perfect trust in God, and entire submission to His will, will be found throughout herletters. We know that at one time she wavered in her convictions. Although she never doubted the value of practical religion, although she ever turned to her Bible for help and comfort in hours of distress and anxiety, she had to wrestle heart and soul with theoretical doubts. It seems to have been a struggle of many years’ duration, at the commencement and end of which personal influences played a great part.
We are indebted to an intimate friend and relation of Princess Alice’s for the following communication, which is in accord with the observations of others who knew her: