CHAPTER XXVIIRECRIMINATION
Roger Camm, leading Ada away, went out into the passage, and stood at the door of the cloak-room, while she put on her shawl and hat, and then came out to him. Her face was still flushed, and more sullen than downcast. She did not look at him, as she said, ‘I am ready.’
He gave her his arm, and they went out, to walk the few hundred yards between the schoolroom and Ada’s home. The cold night air blew upon their heated faces, for Roger, though he looked so pale, was in a fever, and Ada’s heart was hot with anger and disappointment. Nothing was said till they arrived at the side door which led to the house part of Mr. Dixon’s premises. Then Ada observed—
‘Well, I suppose after all this, you won’t want to come in.’
‘Oh, Ada!’ exclaimed the young man in a voice of reproach, ‘that is cruel. I want to speak to you, of course. I would not go away and leave you alone—the idea!’
‘Oh, come in, pray! Now that you have spoiled my whole pleasure, and made me a laughing-stock; taking me away, like a baby in disgrace,’ said Ada, in a voice that trembled violently.
They went into the house. The astonished servant came out of the kitchen, on hearing the unexpected noise, but retired when she saw who the intruders were. Mr. and Mrs. Dixon were both at the concert. Ada led the way upstairs, to the family sitting-room, and turned up the gas, and gave Roger the prosaic order to poke the fire.
He did so, and then turned to her. For a little time he stood with his back against the mantelpiece, and his hands clasped behind him. She drew out her handkerchief and held it before her eyes, to conceal the tears which rage and temper prevented from flowing; while she tapped the floor with her foot. It was a cruelly painful ordeal to him, and he was revolving in his mind how to speak to her. How, how was he to reproach her? For reproach her he must. He had gone so suddenly into the ante-room at the concert; for once, he had seen Ada and her actions clearly, and without any flattering veil over them—had seen her openly coquetting with another man, and that a man whose character and station made it impossible for such coquetting to be innocent. It was her innocence and ignorance, he told himself, with yearning love in his heart, which had permitted her to be so misled. All that was necessary was for him to tell her what the real character was, that Otho Askam bore, and she would see what a mistake she had made. But how to begin—what words were soft enough, gentle enough? While he was thus inwardly debating, Ada suddenly looked up.
‘Have you brought me here to play at a quaker’s meeting?’ she asked, angrily. ‘I thought you said you had something to say; and I wish you’d be quick with it, as I’m sure it’s nothing agreeable.’
‘Ada, is that my fault?’ he asked, turning to her with a wistful look.
‘Of course it is your fault,’ was the indignant reply. ‘Why must you fly into a passion about nothing at all, and speak to me as if I’d been doing something worse than any one else ever did, and insult me, and speak in such a way to a gentleman like Mr. Askam—and Miss Wynter sitting there? Am I not to be allowed to speak to a gentleman?’
‘Ada!’ he exclaimed, all the gentle phrases scattered to the winds at the picture which her words conjured into his mind, and speaking solemnly, and even sternly,—‘for heaven’s sake be silent, or you will drive me to speak to you in a way that I shall repent. Gentleman! No gentleman would behave as that blackguard behaved to-night. When I went in and saw him leaning over your chair, I wonder I did not rush at him and knock him down, without a word. Let me tell you that no girl’s character would benefit by its being known that Otho Askam was on friendly terms with her. He is a thorough-paced cad, without honour, or honesty, or principles. Child, child! How could you let him lead you on, in the face——’
‘You’re never jealous!’ cried Ada, her anger turned into something like a smile.
‘Jealous!’ echoed Roger, with unspeakable contempt in his tone. ‘When I have to be jealous of him, it will be all up between you and me. I boil with rage at the pollution you suffer from his familiarity. Ada—you do love me, my darling, don’t you?’
‘Why, yes, of course,’ said Ada, slowly.
‘Then you must promise me to have no more to do with him. See to what you have driven me already. Ishall have to have a reckoning with him to-morrow. I shall tell him what I think of him, and promise him a horsewhipping, if ever he ventures upon such impertinence again——’
‘Roger!’ The presumption, the audacity of his words, caused Ada to turn pale.
‘And of course,’ Roger went on, calmly, ‘I shall have to shake the dust of this place from my feet. I have no fear of not being able to get another situation; but it may be some little time first; it may be a long way from here when I do get it; it cannot be here, of course; there is no other place here. And that will separate us. You did not know or foresee all this; you could not, but it is so, you see. And I cannot speak quite calmly about it.’
Ada was silent. Roger thought she was thunderstruck on being shown the consequences of what had doubtless seemed to her a few flattering attentions.
‘I don’t see the good of making all that fuss about it,’ she said at last. ‘There was no wrong in Mr. Askam’s saying a few words to me; but people will say there is, if you go on in that way.’ (A feminine view of the case which had not before occurred to Roger.) ‘I have always been a friend of Miss Wynter’s——’
‘Yes, indeed; and precious little good it has done you,’ was Roger’s ill-advised retort.
‘And Miss Askam sat talking with me for nearly an hour the other day. There’s nothing strange about it. I have always felt at home with the gentry about here, and there’s proof positive that it isn’t only the gentlemen who notice me——’
‘Notice you—notice you!’ he said, stung intensely by her words. ‘Who wants you to be noticed? Youhave no need of any one’s notice. No honest girl has——’
‘Honest girl! Well, I declare!’
‘Your lines are not cast among such people. They only amuse themselves with you, whatever you may think. If you keep them at a distance they respect you. As for Miss Wynter, I have always disliked her——’
‘Yes, you have; and without a scrap of reason. You think she’s worse than poison, and say all sorts of things about her,—false, I’ve heard you call her. And there was she before you came in, talking to Mr. Askam and trying with all her might to make him behave himself——’
‘Oh!’ said Roger, turning sharp upon her, with an expression of bitter pain upon his face. ‘Ifshedid that, he must have needed it, sorely. And you said to me that there was no harm in what he was doing. Ada, my girl, this is cruel; it is, indeed.’
‘Oh dear!’ exclaimed Ada, mentally anathematising her maladroit admission. ‘She was just as bad as you, for making too much of it. I only meant to show that she is not the false woman you call her.’
‘I judge her by her actions. As for Miss Askam, she is different. Dr. Rowntree knows her, and he says so; and Michael Langstroth——’
‘Oh, I know he thinks so. And of course he’s always right!’ retorted Ada, excitedly. ‘Every one knows that. I suppose if he had been talking to me, we should have heard none of all this.’
‘Not a word; you are quite right,’ said Roger, constrainedly. ‘I should have known there was some reason for what he did. But that’s just it. No one ever hears of him making a fool of himself in that way, andbehaving like a cad at a public entertainment. It isn’t in him.’
‘I know I’m awfully tired of hearing Dr. Langstroth’s praises for ever sung. And as for Miss Askam, of course he says she is an angel, and an angel that’s pretty thick with him, by all accounts.’
‘What do you mean? Who says anything against them?’ asked Roger, indignant at her tone.
‘Goodness! I never said it was against them. I see no harm in it; but then I’m not so strait-laced as some people. They’ve been seen riding together, not so long ago, and he called there when Mr. Askam was away.’
‘Their meeting was a pure accident.’
‘Oh, of course! Such things are alwaysaccidents,’accidents,’said Ada, with a laugh.
‘Do you mean that you doubt me, Ada?’ he asked, very seriously.
‘Doubtyou?—not at all. I suppose Dr. Langstroth said it was an accident, and of course we all know he has nothing to do but speak, and you do what he tells you, and believe what he says.’
This shaft fell quite ineffectually.
‘It does not matter who circulated the report,’ said Roger. ‘Every one knows that Miss Askam is a young lady of the very highest character.’
‘She’s perhaps got all the propriety for herself and her brother as well——’
‘It is very certain that her brother has none. And that brings me back. Ada, you will promise me not to have anything further to do with him, will you not, dear?’
‘If he speaks to me, I suppose I’m to shut my mouth and not say a word?’
‘He shall not speak to you again in any way that you cannot answer.’
‘Oh, what do I care for him? I want none of him, especially if there’s to be all this fuss made about it,’ said Ada; but she did not meet his eyes as she spoke.
‘That’s my own dearest Ada!’ exclaimed Roger, too much pleased with what he considered her promise, to notice anything else. ‘And by to-morrow night, I hope to have done with him for ever. I will speak to your father, and make it right with him. And now let us forget it all, and have some music by ourselves, shall we?’
But Ada was by no means to be so easily pacified. She declined the music entirely, and said that such a concert could not in the least make up for the one she had lost. After some utterly abortive attempts to keep up a cheerful conversation, all of which she cut short with snaps, or yawns, Roger at last relieved her of his company, and went on his way, with the dreary, blank sense that he and she were thoroughly divided in their opinion upon the occurrences of the evening.
But she was so young, so innocent, he said to himself. What could she possibly know of the real character of a man like Otho Askam, or of the sinister and compromising nature of any attentions from him? Patience, patience! he preached to himself, and it would all come right. When she was married to him, and he could speak plainly to her, soul to soul, there would be no more of these misunderstandings, these clouds and disputes. She would be innocent still, but not ignorant any more.
And, perhaps, so far as he was himself concerned, it was better for his soul’s health to be free from all connection with a man like Askam.
Thus he reflected, as he took his homeward way, and on arriving at the Red Gables, found the rooms dark, and Michael still absent.
About half-past ten he arrived, and found Roger alone, in an easy-chair by the fireside.
‘Halloa! Back again!’ exclaimed Michael.
‘Ay!’
‘You took her away altogether, did you?’
‘Yes.’
‘Quite right, too. Brutes like him want showing that they can’t ride rough-shod over every one andeverything.’everything.’
‘Michael, do you think he is a little cracked?’
‘Not a particle, unless being born bad, and a bully, is being cracked. It is a somewhat debatable question, you know, now. We are so very liberal and tolerant in these days. It seems to be the theory that if by chance you behave decently, you ought at once to have a statue put up to you; whereas, if you conduct yourself like a savage, or a blackleg, or as if you had been brought up amongst professional thieves, and the lowest riff-raff, the thing is, that you are not quite all there, poor fellow!—that’s all, and ought not to be considered accountable for your actions. It’s not a view that I ever took, and I say that Otho Askam is no more mad than you are at this moment. He’s vicious, and he’s a bully. And I suppose that Miss Wynter had crossed him in some way, and he wanted to punish her publicly. That’s about the tune ofit.’it.’
‘Bullies are usually cowards,’ observed Roger, reflectively.
‘And so is he. Wait till the time comes when the shoe begins to pinch,—when his sins come back to him,and demand house-room with him, and bring their children by the hand, and when he has made such a hole in his estate that even his guardian angel can’t stave off the remarks of creditors; then you’ll see where his brag ends.’
‘Nothing would give me greater pleasure than to look on at such a moment,’ said Roger, speaking out of the pride and the blindness of his heart. ‘To-morrow he will have to whistle to the tune of my saying good-bye to him, and leaving him to his own resources. I’m not a “gentleman born,” like he is——’
‘Now come, Roger. You’ll be saying next that all “gentlemen born” are like Otho Askam, and all “working men,” as you are pleased to call yourself, are just like you—on the same level, and with the same feelings. Keep within bounds.’
‘Not a gentleman by birth, like he is,’ Roger went on softly; ‘but I am a human being, with susceptibilities, and with coarse desires and impulses. The former have been wounded by his behaviour to my betrothed, which I consider to have been wanting in respect. The latter inspire me to tell him he is a cad, threaten him with a horsewhipping, and cry quits with him. Don’t say anything against it, because I am going to do it, and it’s no use your worrying about it.’
‘I—worry. Nay, you may choke him by knocking his own impudence down his throat, if you like; I have nothing against it. I am sorry for his sister, I must say. Did you see her to-night?’
‘Yes,’ said Roger, tranquilly. ‘So did you. She looked superb.’
‘And miserable, poor thing! Who would guess them to be brother and sister?’
‘Who, indeed?’
‘I cannot imagine that she can be very happy in that house.’
‘I can’t imagine that any decent person would.’
Then Roger lighted a pipe, and smoked it, before going to bed. Michael pulled out a book, and said he had some reading to do. How soon the one slept, how much the other read—these things have not been ascertained.