SECTION VI.Butter, Cheese, Milk, Cream, and Potatoes.BUTTER.Butter is not exempt from adulteration: the inferior kinds are frequently mixed up with hogs-lard which has lost its flavour and appearance; and not unfrequently kitchen-stuff forms a portion of the bulk.Good butter is hard and firm; therefore that butter which is often sold in the shops in London, that adheres to the knife when applied to, or stuck into it, is factitious, that is, manufactured in a machine, of the following materials—viz. rancid fresh butter, the cheap unsaleable Scotch butters of various hues and dyes, and a quantity of salt, well rummaged and pomelled together. This spurious commodity is of a white cast, and generally sold under the denomination of “Dorset.” It should be recollected that the cheesemongers never beat the good butters, as the beating injures the flavour; they bestow their friendly castigations only on the worthless commodity for the purpose of extracting a portion of its rancidity and obnoxious smell.Butter should be bought by the taste and smell. Both fresh and salt butter should smell sweet, and be ofan equal colour throughout; if veiny and open, it has been mixed with a staler or an inferior sort. The quality of tub butter is ascertained by putting a knife into the butter; and if, on drawing it out, any rancid or unpleasant smell should attach to the knife, the butter is not good; but, perhaps, the best criterion is to taste the butter near the sides of the tub, for the middle is often sweet when the parts near the sides of the tub are quite rank.Hogs-lard is adulterated with the skimmings of the liquor in which pork or bacon has been boiled. Lard thus adulterated has a grey colour, a soft consistence, and a salt taste; whereas lard, when pure, is white, granular, and rather firm in texture.CHEESE, BACON, AND HAMS.When annatto is dear, or of inferior quality in appearance, it is customary with the venders of the article to adulterate it with vermilion or red lead. This contamination has chiefly been confined to the Gloucester cheese; and may be detected by macerating a small quantity of the suspected article in water impregnated with sulphuretted hydrogen, acidulated with muriatic acid; which will immediately cause the cheese to assume a brown or black colour, if the minutest portion of lead be present. I am informed by a respectable dealer, that cheese, especially old Stilton cheese, is frequentlygreenedin particularparts with verdigris, in order to assume the appearance of age.The best cheese is that which is of a dry compact texture, without holes in it; of a whitish colour, and which, on being rubbed between the finger and thumb, almost immediately becomes a soft and somewhat greasy mass. Nor is a moist smooth coat a bad criterion of its quality. It should also be of a moderate age; for neither very decayed, nor decaying cheese, is wholesome; nor is that which is new, adhesive, and ropy, when heated by the fire, of a good kind. Cheshire cheese which crumbles and tastes bitterish has been made of bad milk. Though cheese is generally chosen by the taste, this is by no means a criterion of its nutritive qualities; as the flavour generally depends on the nature of the food which the cows eat, and often on the mode of management in the manufacture of the cheese.In the purchase of bacon and hams, pray bear in mind, friend John, that many more thousands of tons of those articles are sold annually in the metropolis of this land of “just and equal dealing” as “fine, new Hampshire bacon and fine Yorkshire hams,” than are received from those counties altogether; and that though the bacon merchants are supplied with bacon from Ireland, none sellIrishbacon. The large Irish hams are also dried and sold for “fine fresh” Yorkshire or Westmoreland varieties, to tickle the fancy of the “Bull Family” for rarities and expensive purchases.MILK AND CREAM.The usual sophistication of milk is a liberal quantity of warm water, and to give consistence to the mixture, and correct the colour, a composition of flour and yolks of eggs is added; but should there not have been sufficient time for the operation, the immediate aid of the cock or the pump is invoked. But some of the more skilfully initiated “artistes au lait” dissolve the common cheese dye, annatto, which occasions a mixture of milk and water to assume the colour, and nearly the consistence of cream. Among some of the less expert a composition of treacle and salt supplies the place of the annatto; but this mixture does not combine so well as the annatto with the milk. Pure milk is of a dull white colour, and a soft sweetish taste; adulterated milk is of a bluish appearance and thin consistence.Cream receives a copious addition of skimmed milk, flour, starch, rice-powder, or arrow-root boiled together, to increase the “milk-merchant’s” profits. But arrow-root is the substance which is best adapted, and most employed for the purpose. The generally received opinion that milk is adulterated with chalk and whitening is, as Mr. Accum observes, erroneous; for neither of those ingredients could be held in solution in the milk, and would therefore be useless to the adulterator, as theywould sink to the bottom of the pail while the manufacturer was doling out his composition to his customers. But the practice of putting the milk into leaden pans, or vessels made of that metal, to occasion the milk to throw up a larger portion of cream, is sufficiently authenticated, and deserves exposure, from the liability of having the milk impregnated with particles of lead.Perhaps some of my readers may be lovers of curds and whey; if so, I recommend them to endeavour to get a sight of the calf’s maw, from which the rennet is made before it is boiled. I have had the fortune of being “blessed” with “the captivating sight” more than once; and in each instance I absolutely saw the bladder moving alive with maggots.POTATOES, FRUIT, &c.Even the humble green-grocer exerts his ingenuity and “tact” in the art of sophistication: to augment the weight of his “murphies,” and “make themtell,” he soaks “the dearcratures” in water during the night previous to their sale.While discoursing of the little peccadilloes of the honest tradesmen of “this land of Christianity,” I never apprehended that it was possible to sophisticate fruit. But at the very moment I was about to consummate my bold, and I hope it will prove, patriotic undertaking, by affixing the important and consolatory, though little word, “Finis,” a new discovery presented itself to my astonished optics! Can you believe me, John? I happened to pop in rather inopportunely, that is to say, a-la-mode Paul Pry, on a fruit-artist, who was preparing some stale plums for sale, and giving them all the bloom and fragrance of having been just plucked from the tree. This recondite feat offruitist-ingenuity consists in anointing certain parts of the fruit with gum water, and then shaking a muslin bag containing finely powdered blue upon the prepared parts of the fruit, which are laid uppermost upon a board, to receive the precious unction.—From the honest tradesman whom I thus found patriotically engaged in furthering “the trading and commercial interests of his dear native land,” I also learned that some of the more skilful and enterprizing artists soak plums in water, when they have become shrivelled, in order to plump them out, and make them, as it is fashionably phrased, en-bon-point.What an age of intellect do we live in! Could our good old Druidical ancestors have supposed that their puny and degenerate offspring would be endowed with the extraordinary gift of being able to rejuvenize old worm-eaten nuts? Rare and sublime discovery! What, John, may we not next expect? Surely, we have reached the millenium of the march of intellect and the perfection of sophistication. But I must not keep the reader longer in suspense.The rejuvenization of Old Nuts! Just as I had finished writing the above article, an old and almost forgotten friend called on me, one who has long and scientifically been patriotically engaged, “in this age of intellect,” in rejuvenizing old, rotten, worm-eaten walnuts and almonds, of each last year’s growth, and giving their “externals” all the whiteness and beauty of the lily-white hand of a “fine lady,” and their “internals” all the plumpness and en-bon-point admired by his “most moral majesty,” our late “gracious and beloved sovereign,” in his “fair defects of nature.” By this scion of “the trading interests” I am informed that old nuts of all kinds are first soaked in water in order to plump them out, and then they are fumigated with sulphur for the purpose of rendering the shells white and clean.SECTION VII.Confectionary, Pastry, and Perfumery.The confectionary-artist is not behind his compeers in trade in the honourable vocation of sophistication. There are few articles which owe their paternity to his handy-work, that partake wholly of the ingredients to which they bear resemblance in name and appearance: all, almost all, here is the work of “the black art.”But this is not the worst part of the business. Were any person to be admitted into the “elaboratorical pandemonium” of a pastry-cook or a confectioner—were he to see the disgusting appearance of the vessels in which they manufacture their articles—many of them containing the ingredients with perfect rims of cupreous matter surrounding them—were he to regale his eyes with the sight of the most rancid butter bleaching for the purpose of making pastry, as I have seen, I am sure that he would hold the productions of the confectioner and pastry-cook’s shop in abhorrence, and would not consider Dr. Paris’s denunciation of them, in his useful work on Diet, p. 247, as “an abomination.” A lady with whom I am acquainted, and who lodged at different times in the houses of confectioners and pastry-cooks, had so good an opportunity of witnessingthe cleanliness and wholesomenessof their operations, that for manyyears she has not tasted any commodity that comes out of their manufactories; and I verily believe that she would die of hunger before she could induce herself to allow a scrap of theirdelicaciesto enter her mouth.But these “artists” not only endanger the health and lives of their customers by the carelessness and nastiness of their conduct in their compositions, but they employ preparations of copper, and also of red lead in colouring their fancy sweet-meats. In the preparations of sugar-plumbs, comfits, and other kinds of confectionary, especially those sweat-meats of inferior quality, frequently exposed to sale in the open-streets, for the allurement of children, Mr. Accum, p. 288, informs us, that the greatest abuses are committed by means of powerful poisons. The white comfits, called sugar-peas, are chiefly composed of a mixture of sugar, starch and Cornish clay (a species of very white pipe-clay); and the red sugar drops are usually coloured with the inferior kinds of vermillion or sap green, and often, instead of those pigments, with red lead and copper. As a yellow colour, cromate of lead is used, and prussiate of iron as a blue. The stuff called “hard rock,” “hard bake,” “white lollypop,” and other baby attracting names, is of an equally deleterious quality. Nor are the ginger-bread or sweet cakes of the ginger-baker less injurious to the health of children, especially the “gilt ginger-bread” as it is termed, which is covered with Dutch leaf,—a composition consisting of an alloy of copper and zinc, or brass and copper. Indeed, all parents should, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” observes, anxiously instruct their children never to buy any thing offered for sale in the streets: among my acquaintance more instances than one have occurred in which lamentable results would have been the consequence had not timely aid been afforded the little sufferers. And for the same reason it seems necessary to caution parents never to give painted toys (which are always coloured with red lead, verdigris, and other potent poisons,) to children, who are apt to put every thing, especially if it gives them pleasure, into their mouths.The mischievous consequences occasioned by the use of sugar confectionary, coloured with metallic and vegetable poisons, are provided against by the French Government, by being under the surveillance branch of the police, entitled the Council of Health, by whom an ordonnance is issued, that no confectionary shall be sold, unless wrapped up in paper, stamped with the name and address of the confectioner; and the ordonnance further provides that the vendors shall be held responsible for all accidents occasioned by confectionary sold in their shops. M. Chevallier has, in the Journal de Chimie Médicale for Jan. 1831, discussed this subject with considerable ability.“The foreign conserves, such as small green limes, citron, hop-tops, plumbs, angelica roots, &c. imported into this country, and usually sold in round chip boxes, are frequently impregnated with copper.” Indeed, mostof thedelicaciesand “good things” to be obtained in confectioner’s shops, are tinted with all the colours of the rainbow, by the agency of lead, copper, brass, arsenic, or some other poisonous metal.The presence of lead and copper is readily detected by pouring liquid ammonia over the article suspected of being adulterated with the first mentioned metal, which will acquire a blue colour; and sulphuretted hydrogen, acidulated with muriatic acid, where the second article is suspected to have been made use of in the adulteration, when the article will assume a dark brown or black colour. The adulteration by means of clay may be ascertained by dissolving the suspected article in boiling water, when the sediment or precipitate at the bottom of the vessel ready discovers the fraud.For the purpose of communicating an almond or a kernel flavour to custards, blanc-mange, and other productions of his art, and to render them grateful to the palates of his customers, the pastry-cook flavours them with the leaves of the poisonous plant, the cherry-laurel. And the basis of his favourite blanc-mange often consists of the shreds of the dried bladders of horses, the skins of soles, and other animal membranes, as cheap substitutes for isinglass. Among his less objectionable sophistications may be mentioned, his fabrication of creams, custards, tarts, and other kinds of pastry, from rice powder and skimmed milk.The negus and lemonade made by pastry-cooks, and the punch of public and coffee-houses, are made of tartaric acid, as a cheap substitute for citric or lemon acid.The perfumers, the keepers of the “emporiums and bazaars of fashion,” the manufacturers of the “best genuine bears’ grease,” of the “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of the “Kalydors”—of “Les Cosmetiques Royales”—of the “Red and White Olympian Dews,” and other prodigiously grand and etymological titles “breathing the spirit of patriotic rivalry,” have all exerted their respective wits in the art of economising expense and “saving a penny.” In fact the tooth-powders, the dentrifices, the ottars of roses, the musks, the cosmetics, the lotions, the balsams, the Hungary waters, the Eaus de Cologne, as well as all the other frenchifiedeaus, themilksandcreamsof roses, the pomades divines, the blooms, the pearl-waters, the lip-salves, the perfumes,—the Naples almond and beautifying soaps,—the cephalic, Macouba, and other-hard named snuffs, are all vile sophistications, and (to omit speaking of their injurious properties to the health and the skin,) contain but little of the ingredients of which the artists profess that they are made. On this subject I shall address myself especially to my fair readers: craving leave to premise, that it is strange that British ladies, to whom Nature has been so bountiful, should destroy their native charms and have recourse to the wretched substitutes of art, whichare destructive of beauty, andproduce real deformity.As many ladies attempt to improve their complexionsby the use of the pernicious cosmetics, which are continually and unblushingly advertised as beautifiers of the skin, most of which are either worthless or dangerous, (for if they have any effect, it is that of conveying mercury, lead, or bismuth into the system, and too frequently laying the foundation of diseases which are often dangerous, and sometimes fatal;) I cannot refrain from advising those “fair ones” who have been in the habit of using trash of so villainous a nature, that if they have any of it by them, to throw it away at once, and to be persuaded that the best cosmetics are exercise in the open air, an active attention to social and domestic duties, regular hours of repose at night, and cheerful hilarity and tranquility of mind, and that those cheap andwholesomeremedies will not, as the author of “The Toilette Companion” well observes, fail to animate their countenances and beautify their complexions beyond the blooms and the balsams, the Grecian and the Egyptian Waters, the Kalydors and the Macassar Oils, the Gowland’s Lotions and the Pearl Powders, the Cosmetiques Royales, the Red and White Olympian Dews, the Essences, the Eaus, and the Pomades Divines, the Essences Apolloniennes or Tyrian, and the Tonic Wines, and all the other puffed and delusive nostrums, that knavery, cupidity, and effrontery, have ever palmed upon a credulous public, by which dull and lustreless eyes, sallow and shrivelled skins, lifeless and cloudy complexions, and impaired and ruined health, are infallibly super-induced:or those simple and easily purchased ingredients, with a strict attention to cleanliness, that is, well washing the skin every day, and drying it with a course towel,—or when the head, neck, or face perspire, rubbing it dry with a towel of the like description, will, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” says, more effectually beautify the complexion, preserve the skin pure, soft, and pervious, and consequently the health firm and unaffected, than all the frauds that have ever been contrived to cheat and deceive the unwary or the inexperienced. Cold water, however, should not be used when the skin is warm, nor very warm water when it is chilled. For as the author of that clever little work “The Toilette Companion, orThe whole Art of Beauty and of Dressing,” says, “Many a beautiful face, neck, and arm, have been spoiled by not observing this caution.”I have mentioned the dangerous consequences from the use of the repellent cosmetics and other quack nostrums puffed off in the newspapers; but, as example is more convincing than precept, I shall present my readers with a few cases of their lamentable results, which fell under the observation of the celebrated Dr. Darwin.“Mrs. S. being much troubled with pimples, applied an alum poultice to her face, which was soon followed by a stroke of the palsy, and terminated in her death. Mrs. L. applied to her face for pimples a quack nostrum, supposed to be some preparation of lead. Soonafter she was seized with epileptic fits, which ended in palsy and caused her death. Mr. Y. applied a preparation of lead to his nose to remove pimples, and it brought on palsy on one side of his face. Miss S. an elegant young lady, applied a cosmetic lotion to her face for small red pimples. This produced inflammation of the liver, which required repeated bleedings with purgatives to remove. As soon as the inflammation was subdued, the pimples re-appeared.” (Darwin’s Zoonomia.) Every person could enlarge this catalogue from the sphere of his own acquaintance.I am willing to believe that I have (to use a legal phrase) made out a sufficient case to prove the inefficacy, nay thedangerousconsequences of cosmetics, and the rest of the long list of et-ceteras forbeautifyingthe skin. It will now be my duty to direct my attention to the other frauds and impositions practised under the titles of “hair strengtheners”—“hair beautifyers”—of “best genuine bears’ grease”—of “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of “Pommades Divines,”—and the remaining hair hoaxes and humbugs, played off as hair oils, Russia oils, and similar puffed nostrums, under pretty andtakingtitles, by Prince, Ross and Son, M’Alpine, and the rest of the bear’s grease and hair-oil men; and I shall feel a singular pleasure should I be the medium of saving any “lovely or loveable woman” from becoming the dupe of imposture and deception.Amongst the various cosmetics recommended by theadventurer for the dressing room, it must be admitted that none seems more harmless than those which profess to give a fine curl to the hair. But to assert that any liquid will, of itself, give a permanent or temporary curl to the hair is fallacious; though it is true that the application of a weak soap lye, or a solution of caustic potash, will render the hair more susceptible of adopting the artificial curl given by putting it into papers. But then it must be recollected that the effect occasioned by soap lye or potash is only produced by a complete alteration of the organic structure of the hair, superinducing a slow but certain destruction of that beautiful ornament of the human head. This effect may not be immediately observed, either in youth or in advanced life; but it is certain and inevitable.Equally destructive are the various liquid dyes so loudly boasted of, and extensively advertised, by quacks for colouring the hair; some of them, indeed, do produce the effect proposed, particularly the black dyes; but they are allinjurious, especially the black, as their basis consists always of nitrate of silver, (that is, silver dissolved in nitric acid or aqua-fortis) or lunar caustic when in a dry state; but the operation is destructive of the hair, as must be evident to any one who has seen the effect of caustic on warts on the skin. It has been well said that if we wish to save our hair, we must first save our money, by abstaining from the whole list of those puffed and unprincipled recipes and nostrums that stare us inthe face in every newspaper, and in almost every shop-window.The folly of giving credence to any of the impudent and disgraceful impostures for the pretended power of certain ingredients to change the colour of the hair, must, as the author ofThe Toilette Companionobserves, be evident to every person when he is told that the hair depends on a peculiar secretion, and that, when that secretion ceases, which it does from several causes, as grief, fright, ill health, great mental exertion, age, &c. the hair becomes grey: “for Nature, like a provident mother, when she feels the powers of life impaired or decaying, exerts all her energies to support and preserve the vital organs, and can no longer, from her limited means, supply the outposts and ornamental parts of the system as before, which therefore suffer and are sacrificed.”Nor are the deceits of the base nostrum-mongers for making the hair grow and curl, or for making the bald pericranium of a nonagenarian vegetate in all the luxuriance of rejuvenization, the only frauds practised: equally destructive are the advertised depilatories, the general basis of which is yellow orpiment, a certain poison if taken inwardly. It is true that the Turks, with whom bald heads are in fashion, and also the Chinese, do use this as an unguent, to save the trouble of frequent shaving; but it should be recollected that those cosmetics which may be harmless on the head of a robust Janissary,—of a bashaw of three tails or a fat Mandarin,do not necessarily become fit adjuncts for the toilette of a “British fair,”—“the lovely daughters of Albion, Erin, or Scotia,” or even that of an “Herculean delicate,” a Lilliputian dandy, or a Bond-street exquisite.Snuff-sniffers and tobacco-munchers and puffers, do ye know what the delectable ingredients which form part of the articles of your recreation, are? Have you never heard that snuff is often compounded of pulverised nut-shells, of the powder of old rotten wood, called powder post; that the colour is improved by ochre, and the appearance and feel modified by an addition of treacle or urine? And have you never been told that the pungency of snuff is increased by the agency of powdered glass or the muriate of ammonia? Tobacco smokers and “chawers,” have ye never been told that your favourite “quid” is often composed of black hellebore, corrosive sublimate, dried dock-leaves, and a variety of otherinnocentingredients? Oh, dear! what a deal you have yet to learn before you “become wise as serpents!”SECTION VIII.MEDICINES;MEDICAL EMPIRICISM,ANDQUACKS AND QUACKERY,REGULAR AND IRREGULAR,LEGITIMATE AND ILLEGITIMATE.Devoted to disease by baker, butcher, grocer, wine-merchant, spirit-dealer, cheesemonger, pastry-cook, and confectioner; the physician is called to our assistance; but here again the pernicious system of fraud, as it has given the blow, steps in to defeat the remedy;—the unprincipled dealers in drugs and medicines exert the most diabolical ingenuity in sophisticating the most potent and necessary drugs, (viz. peruvian bark, rhubarb, ipecacuanha, magnesia, calomel, castor-oil, spirits of hartshorn, and almost every other chemical preparation in general demand;) and chemical preparations used in pharmacy; and the fraud has increased to so alarming an extent, says Mr. Accum, and his assertion is borne out by the experience of every one familiar with chemistry, that nine-tenths of the drugs and medicines in use that are vended by dealers, even of respectability and reputation, according to the usual interpretation of those words, “and who would,” as that gentleman emphatically expresses himself, “be thelastto be suspected,”are adulterated. And what tends to aggravate theevil is that manufactories and mills on “an amazingly large scale” are constantly at work in this metropolis for the manufacture of spurious drugs. From these licensed elaboratories of disease, the adulterated articles are vended to unprincipled druggists, at less than a third of the price of the genuine article. And as there are no certain tests or methods of detecting the fraud, the consequence is, that the physician’s prescription is rendered useless, and the most consummate skill often baffled in the subjection of disease. Some idea of the extent of the adulteration of drugs may be formed, when it is stated that a spurious peruvian bark is sometimes sold, compounded of mahogany saw-dust and oak-wood, ground into powder, with a proper proportion of genuine quinquina; and that magnesia, even the calcined sort, is adulterated with lime.Chemical cunning has even contrived to extract the quinquina, in which consists the whole virtue of the bark, leaving it a completely inert mass. And even the quinine itself is sophisticated, being frequently contaminated with lime, tallow, sugar, and sulphate of cinchonas.It is necessary also to make some little inquiry, and use some little exercise of one’s understanding, in ascertaining for what reasons certain physicians recommend particular druggists, and particular drugs which are manufactured by the “said particular” druggists. Dr. Reece, in his Monthly Gazette of Health for August 1829, has tended to open one’s eyes a little on the subject. He informs us that the late Ambrose Godfrey, the nostrum-monger, contrived to get his preparation of arrow-root into notice and sale at double the price for which it might have been obtained of any other druggist, by accompanying samples of his commodity with presents of haunches of venison to certain physicians, and that by judicious repetitions (“neither few nor far between”) of the said conciliating haunches of venison, he contrived to maintain the reputation and supposed superiority of the said arrow-root, and to keep the monopoly to himself, as all the said learned and grateful physicians always, as in due allegiance and duty they were bound, recommended the said Godfrey Ambrose’s arrow-root as superior to that of all other simple wights, who supposed that their composition of arrow-root could be good for any thing, if they forgot, or were not able, to give character to the commodities by means of the mute but irresistible influence or eloquence of the said judiciously disposed-of haunches of venison. From this account it appears that the “sons of Galen” and the artificers of “the pestle and mortar” are not behind their brethren of “the long robe,” and “of the quill and parchment tribe” in the “art ofhuggery.” How often has a “learned barrister” contrived to get into the good graces of an attorney and secured practice by invitations to dinner, and judiciously and well timed (for few persons are better versed in the art of throwing a sprat to catch a whale than a hungry and briefless, and it must be admitted, often highly gifted barrister;) presents of game, by a hearty and unseen shake of the hand in the street, which he dared not have given at Westminster Hall, andby all those ingenious means, to which men of great talent have before now condescended, and by which men of little talent have sometimes gained considerable fortunes.Nor has the spirit of adulteration allowed even the accredited patent or quack medicines to escape its ingenuity. Dr. James’s Fever Powders, and Norris’s Fever Drops, besides a variety of other popular receipts, are to be obtained in all possible degrees of strength and flavours from the various venders and manufacturers of the articles.Even the simple articles arrow-root, worm-seed, Spanish liquorice, lemon acid, soda water, lozenges, honey, spermaceti, and a long list of other commodities in general use, receive thebenefitof the sophisticators’ ingenuity.The greater part of the commodity sold under the name of arrow-root in the shops of the druggists and grocers is prepared from the fecula or starch of wheat and of dry mealy potatoes, with a portion of arrow-root. When good, the grains of arrow-root are very fine, with numbers of little clots which are formed by the aggregation of the minuter grains while the commodity is drying, and when examined by a magnifying glass appear pearly and very brilliant.The seeds of the tansy are often offered for sale, for worm-seed; but the moreconscientiousdealer sometimes treats his customers with an equal portion of the genuine and the adulterated article.The Spanish liquorice juice of the shops is generallycomposed of the worst kind of gum arabic, called Indian or Barbary gum, and imported chiefly for the purpose of making shoe-blacking, with a small portion of the genuine juice; and the factitious composition, when inspissated, is formed into rolls, resembling the genuine article imported from Catalonia, nicely sprinkled or stratified with particles of dry bay-leaves, and skilfully impressed with the word “Solaz,” in the true cast of Spanish engraving.Refinedliquorice is frequently manufactured from Spanish juice, with an equal quantity of carpenters’ glue or starch. The specimens of genuine juice are generally small, perfectly black, brittle, and break with a smooth and glassy fracture. They are also soluble either in the mouth or in water, without leaving any residue.The lemon acid of commerce is, as I have before said, a counterfeit; tartareous acid being employed as a cheap substitute for lemon or citric acid.The soda-water on general sale is frequently contaminated with copper and lead, produced from the action of the carbonic acid contained in the water on the metallic substances of which the apparatus in which it is made is constructed.The lozenges of all varieties, hues, flavours, and qualities, particularly those in the composition of which ginger, cream of tartar, magnesia, &c. are used, are sophisticated with a liberal portion of pipe-clay, as a cheap substitution for sugar; but this fraud is readily detected by laying one of the suspected lozenges on the pan of a fire shovel or sheet of iron made red-hot; when, if it bepure, it will readily take fire and be consumed, but if it be adulterated, it will burn feebly, and a hard strong substance will remain, resembling the lozenge in form.It is well known that but little genuine honey can be obtained in London. The tests of good honey are its fragrance and sweetness. When it is suspected to be adulterated with starch or bean flour, the fraud may be discovered by dissolving the honey in cold water, when the flour will be readily seen, as it will not dissolve, but falls to the bottom of the vessel in powder. If honey thus adulterated be exposed to heat, it soon solidifies and becomes tenacious.Honey is of three kinds; the first, calledvirgin honey, and which is of the finest flavour, is of a whitish cast, and in a fluid state, about the consistence of a syrup. The second is that known by the name ofwhite honey, and its texture is almost solid. The third kind is the common yellow honey, obtained from the combs, by heating them over the fire, or by dipping them into hot water, and then pressing them.Manna is sometimes counterfeited by a composition of sugar and honey, mixed with a small portion of scammony.The adulteration of spermaceti is generally effected with wax; but the fraud may be detected by the smell of the adulterating ingredient, and by the dulness of the colour; whereas pure spermaceti is of a semitransparent crystalline appearance. It is also said that a preparation of the oil obtained from the tail of the whale is likewise vendedfor genuine spermaceti; but, as this factitious commodity assumes a yellow shade when exposed to the air, this imposition is also of easy detection.The adulteration of the essential oils obtained from the more expensive spices is so common, that, as Mr. Accum says, “it is not easy to meet with any that are fit for use,” and so much subtle ingenuity is made use of in the sophistications, that no known tests or agents exist for the detection of the fraud. The only certain tests are the taste or flavour, and the smell.It is worth while to attend to the plausible excuses of the respective “artists” of these sophistications. They allege that they are obliged to have recourse to the fraud, to meet the fancies “of those clever persons in their own conceit who are fond of haggling, and insist on buying better bargains than other people, shutting their eyes to the defects of an article, so that they can enjoy the delight of getting it cheap; and secondly, for those persons, who being but bad paymasters, yet as the manufacturer, for his own credit-sake, cannot charge more than the usual price of the articles, he thinks himself therefore authorized to adulterate it in value, to make up for the risk he runs, and the long credit he gives;”—they therefore are reduced to the necessity of keeping, as they term it, “reduced articles,” and genuine ones. This is excellent logic, and no doubt well understood by the whole sophisticating tribe. The public are indebted to Dr. T. Lloyd for this information, which he communicated to the Literary Gazette, No. 146.The ready methods or tests for ascertaining the good qualities of the most common drugs are:Castor-oil, when good, is of a light amber or straw colour, inclining to a greenish cast. That which has the least smell, taste, and colour, is considered the mildest. The necessity of some attention to these signs may appear, when I state that I once took seven ounces of this oil in successive doses, and do verily believe that I might have continued to this present hour taking, daily, the usual dose furnished from the same quarter, with as little effect, had not my good genius directed me to send for an ounce from Apothecaries’ Hall. I recommend my readers to purchase their drugs, &c. in the same place.Ipecacuanha.—As this drug is sold to the public in a pulverized state, there is no short or off-hand test for discovering its purity. It is adulterated with emetic tartar.Opium.—Good opium in a concrete state should be of a blackish brown colour, of a strong fetid smell, a hard viscous texture, and heavy; and when rubbed between the finger and thumb, it is perfectly free from roughness or grittiness. This drug is liable to great adulteration, being frequently vitiated with cow-dung, or a powder composed of the dry leaves and stalks of the poppy, the gum of the mimosa, meal and other substances. The flavour alone indicates the goodness of opium in a liquid state.Rhubarb.—The marks of the goodness of rhubarbare the liveliness of its colour when cut; its being firm, dry, and solid, but not flinty or hard; its being easily pulverizable, and appearing, when powdered, of a fine bright yellow colour; and its imparting to the spittle, when chewed, a deep saffron-colour, and not proving slimy or mucilaginous to the taste. When rhubarb has become worm-eaten, druggist-ingenuity is called into play, by filling up the holes with a paste made of rhubarb-powder and mucilage; and then the physic-artists roll the mended pieces in the finest rhubarb powder to give their handy works a good colour and an appearance of freshness.Senna leaves are frequently mixed and sophisticated with leaves of argol, box leaves, &c.But among the frauds and impositions practised on the public, none are more odious and unprincipled, and, at the same time, more loudly call for the prompt and active interference of the Legislature, than the tricks and effrontery of impostors, quacks, and empirics in medicine, both regular and irregular. It cannot but have been the frequent subject of regret to every honest and reflecting person that this vile trade should receivea legal sanction and protection, which it most assuredly does by virtue of the stamp duty imposed on the villainous trash; and it cannot be sufficiently deplored that any government should find itself reduced to straits so deplorable, or be so short-sighted in its views of enlightened policy, as to be under the necessity of extracting a paltry and disgraceful profitto the revenue of the state, from the tolerance and encouragement of ignorance, imposture, and mischief.The assertion is true, that those pests of society the charlatans and nostrum-mongers “quarter” themselves only on the ignorance and credulity of mankind, and that their patrons and supporters are wealthy but ignorant men, and superstitious old women, or profligate and thoughtless rakes; but this is a miserable excuse, and but lame kind of reasoning: if it means any thing, it proves the necessity of public protection from the abominable and anti-christian nuisance. Can there be greater libel on the utility and operation of English law, than that vermin of the description of the “Balsam of Rackasiri” empirics[M]should be tolerated and allowed to spread their mischief and destruction among the population of a country professing Christianity and civilization, and forsooth, to boast of “the thousands they payyearly to the government and the public press,” in the form of duty to the one forits sanction and licence, and to the other in the form of remuneration for giving a disgraceful and destructive publicity to their nefarious designs.[N]Nor is the absence of a proper discrimination between right and wrong of a certain prating brazen-faced“barrister” less reprehensible. I love and venerate “the Bar;” but I must be free to say that when a man can be found so devoid of just and proper feeling as to appear, for the paltry remuneration of a few pounds, or foranyremuneration however large, in the defence and propagation ofnaked and disgusting fraud and peculation—aye, andthe secret and wide-spreading destruction of health and lifetoo!—it evidently proves that there are some members of that distinguished profession who are not possessed of the high and honourable feelings which belong to those who are gentlemen by birth and breeding, scholars by education, and Christians and honourable men from moral and religious feeling. But it is to be hoped that there will never occur again a similar exhibition to that which took place at Marlborough-street on the infamous Rackasiri-balsam fraud, practised on Miss May, by “thelearned graduatesof Petticoat-lane,” and “regularly bred physicians,” the Jew pedlars and old clothesmen “ofwonderful abilities,” the “Doctors” C. and J. Jordan; who “feelawkwardnessin recommending to public notice theiruncommon discoveries and talents.” The more I consider that transaction, the more I am satisfied that the magistrates are to blame for having allowed the piece of impudent effrontery and imposture to have had the semblance of their sanction, by their singular taciturnity which happened on that occasion. Of the newspapers which gave currency and circulation to the artful and fiend-likeexculpation, language will not afford terms strong enough to express one’s abhorrence and indignation. O shame! where is thy blush? How much human misery and destruction has the insertion of those disgraceful and wicked puffs occasioned, by inducing the weak and credulous to give credit to that as a piece of intelligence coming from editors of accredited and impartial journals, which is merely the contrivance and fabrication of wicked impostors to delude and ensnare the thoughtless and unsuspecting; and for the giving of its mischievous publicity, the proprietors and editors of certain newspapers received large sums of money. But let those thoughtless men reflect, that it is the very consummation of cruelty and unprincipled conduct to sanction the infamous tampering with the lives and happiness of one’s fellow creatures for the mere sake of lucre. Nor is the conduct of the magistrates of certain police offices (particularly those to whom the jurisdiction of the city of London is entrusted) less reprehensible, and less fraught with mischievous consequences. What! ought the frauds and murderous designs of the basest miscreants alive to receive the solemn and imposing sanction and authority of an oath made before a judicial tribunal? Surely a grosser violation of duty and a more stupid and reckless indifference to the destruction of human health and life, were never, in the most barbarous country, and the most uncivilized age, exhibited, than the want of sense and foresight displayed by some city-magistrates in allowing affidavits to be made beforethem of the “wonderful cures” performed on the deluded and perjuredagentsand “stalking horses” of the empirics and impostors; but, fortunately for mankind, the culpable act will ever remain on record as a stigma and reproach of city-legislation and moral economy. The trade oflegalizedpoisoning and destruction of public health has received greater and more effectual help and recommendation from that source than from all the arts and devices of the impostors, though aided by the sanction of a government duty, and the disgusting and unprincipled puffs and paragraphs of a certain portion of the public press. To put an end to these culpable and mischievous proceedings, either on the part of magistrates or of editors of newspapers, in future, I wish those gentlemen to bear in mind that their “misdoings” shall entitle them to a “niche and an escutcheon of immortality” in the pages of “Deadly Adulteration and Slow Poisoning Unmasked;”“If there’s a hole in a’ your coats,E’en from Land’s End to John o’Groats,I’d rede ye tent it;A chiel’s amang you taking notes,And faith he’ll prent it:”and that no threats or intimidations of “actions” and “reparations due to the wounded feelings of gentlemen,” shall deter me from my duty. If I should offend, of course the courts of justice are open to every injuredman, and he will most assuredly receive his due measure of justice there; but should I give that offence for which the “law of the land” affords no redress, the man of honourable feelings and conduct shall never have to complain of my backwardness to give a most prompt and satisfactory reparation; but, at the same time, I wish that those who have been privy, whether by overt or covert acts—whether from their love of “filthy lucre,” or their natural propensity to fraud—to the destruction of the lives or health of their fellow-creatures, to recollect that I shall be prepared to treat them with the scorn and contempt which their conduct and their misdeeds may merit.It has been well said that it is not easy to determine whether the fraud and impudence of the empiric or nostrum-monger, or the folly and credulity of the sufferer, are the greater. But the fact is that quacks and impostors of all kinds, whether medical or political,pædagoguecalorcorporational, live and thrive on the infernal popish maxim, thatignorance is the mother of devotion, that is, in plainer phrase—ofgullibility. But to the case of the quacks.—It surely indicates no ordinary share of dupery, to believe that one and the same nostrum can cure all and every disorder contained in the long catalogue of human woes and miseries; such a belief must incline the victim of its hallucination to suppose an exact similarity of symptoms and a perfect identity of nature in all the disorders to which the frailty of our common nature has rendered ussubject. On this momentous subject few persons have written more forcibly than the admirable author of the “Manual for Invalids.” May the following quotation from that valuable work awaken the attention of those who foolishly confide their health and lives to the care of quacks, nostrum-mongers, jugglers, and impostors![O]“Where dwells the boasted march of intellect when the understanding is continually insulted with the most impudent and daring pretensions of impostors, who, while they pretend to restore your health, are making a direct attack upon your credulity and your purse. What encouragement exists for the well educated men,regular graduates of Universities, of high classical and literary attainments, who have chosen the profession of medicine or surgery as a business of life, and in order to practice with credit and character, have directed their attention, their time, and their property to its studies,—who have made the nature of diseases and the efficacy of remedies a study of life—when they find themselvescompletely superseded by some inspired pretender—some ignorant quack. Lord Bacon has long since said, in his work on the advancement of learning, ‘If the same honours and rewards are given to fools, which ought to be awarded to the wise, who will labour to be wise?’ That the ignorant pretender should be encouraged by the public, is a reproach to the understanding of any people; but that the revenue of any country should be supplied by a stamp duty[P]on empirical nostrums, instead of the government taking measures either of prevention or punishment, can only be explainedby exhibiting similar acts of atrocity on the sentiments of nature; but the truth is, the auri sacra fames has the power of making that appear relatively right, which is absolutely wrong.”[Q]“Beware of hypocrisy of every description,” adds the same excellent writer; “you may as well believe that the Pope can send you to perdition, as that an advertising charlatan can, by any empirical nostrum, restore you to health.”But, unhappily, it appears that poor John Bull and “his hopeful family” are not gifted with the power of being “beware of hypocrisy,” “advertising charlatans” and “empirical nostrums;” but that through their proneness to gullibility and the love of the marvellous, the trade of quackery is daily increasing, and that hundreds of quacks swarm in every quarter of the metropolis, and fatten onthe murders which they are constantly perpetrating with their poisons; and to add to the monstrous combination against the lives and health of the community, that the aid of even the pulpit is invoked to further the propagation of the imposture! Instances are on record where mercenary preachers have been wicked enough to sermonize and expatiate on the miraculous virtues and benefits of the poisonous nostrums[R]and remedies of the mountebank jugglers and impostors.But humbug and imposture, as it has been truly said, is a many-headed monster, and is of very catching influence; it has worshippers at the corner of every street; hordes of the most ignorant vagabonds and jugglers are engaged in its propagation, and announce their impostures as “prepared and sanctioned by His Majesty’s august authority;” but to waste my pages with the mention of the “ladies’ fever”doctorsLamert, Peede, Davis, Eady, Caton, Courtenay, (alias Messrs. Currie and Co.) Fiedeberg (alias Sloane and Co. alias Jones and Co.);—the surreptitious knights, His Carpentership, Sir Gully Daniels, and his Plastership, White Arsenic Sir Cancer Aldis;—the firm of Goss and Company, the consulting Surgeons of Ægis and Hygeiene notoriety;—the miniature painter, “the learned and celebrated” artful artist and curer of consumption, Long St. Long,—the crazy chap who entitles himself the “hygeist”[S]—Taylorand Son, the Leake’s pill-men,—Samuel, the syphilis-pill-man,—the old canting staymaker and life-guardsman, Gardner, who can manufacture tape-worms wholesale and of a league in length from the intestines of cats andchickens,—the piddle-taster, or morning water-doctor, Cameron (alias Crumples,) as also all other quacks, whether of the masculine or feminine gender, who cureby proxy, or by simply pronouncing that the diseaseshall be cured, (for there have been impostors impudent enough to make such pretensions;) or by any art or delusion, and who by chalk, chuckling, and chicanery are battening on the vitals of society, would be an insult tothe understanding of my readers, further than to say that each of those worthies, as well as their honourable compeers the balsam of Rackasiri vagabonds and impostors, can, no doubt, recognize the reality of their deeds in the following quotation from the pages of Hudibras:
Butter is not exempt from adulteration: the inferior kinds are frequently mixed up with hogs-lard which has lost its flavour and appearance; and not unfrequently kitchen-stuff forms a portion of the bulk.
Good butter is hard and firm; therefore that butter which is often sold in the shops in London, that adheres to the knife when applied to, or stuck into it, is factitious, that is, manufactured in a machine, of the following materials—viz. rancid fresh butter, the cheap unsaleable Scotch butters of various hues and dyes, and a quantity of salt, well rummaged and pomelled together. This spurious commodity is of a white cast, and generally sold under the denomination of “Dorset.” It should be recollected that the cheesemongers never beat the good butters, as the beating injures the flavour; they bestow their friendly castigations only on the worthless commodity for the purpose of extracting a portion of its rancidity and obnoxious smell.
Butter should be bought by the taste and smell. Both fresh and salt butter should smell sweet, and be ofan equal colour throughout; if veiny and open, it has been mixed with a staler or an inferior sort. The quality of tub butter is ascertained by putting a knife into the butter; and if, on drawing it out, any rancid or unpleasant smell should attach to the knife, the butter is not good; but, perhaps, the best criterion is to taste the butter near the sides of the tub, for the middle is often sweet when the parts near the sides of the tub are quite rank.
Hogs-lard is adulterated with the skimmings of the liquor in which pork or bacon has been boiled. Lard thus adulterated has a grey colour, a soft consistence, and a salt taste; whereas lard, when pure, is white, granular, and rather firm in texture.
When annatto is dear, or of inferior quality in appearance, it is customary with the venders of the article to adulterate it with vermilion or red lead. This contamination has chiefly been confined to the Gloucester cheese; and may be detected by macerating a small quantity of the suspected article in water impregnated with sulphuretted hydrogen, acidulated with muriatic acid; which will immediately cause the cheese to assume a brown or black colour, if the minutest portion of lead be present. I am informed by a respectable dealer, that cheese, especially old Stilton cheese, is frequentlygreenedin particularparts with verdigris, in order to assume the appearance of age.
The best cheese is that which is of a dry compact texture, without holes in it; of a whitish colour, and which, on being rubbed between the finger and thumb, almost immediately becomes a soft and somewhat greasy mass. Nor is a moist smooth coat a bad criterion of its quality. It should also be of a moderate age; for neither very decayed, nor decaying cheese, is wholesome; nor is that which is new, adhesive, and ropy, when heated by the fire, of a good kind. Cheshire cheese which crumbles and tastes bitterish has been made of bad milk. Though cheese is generally chosen by the taste, this is by no means a criterion of its nutritive qualities; as the flavour generally depends on the nature of the food which the cows eat, and often on the mode of management in the manufacture of the cheese.
In the purchase of bacon and hams, pray bear in mind, friend John, that many more thousands of tons of those articles are sold annually in the metropolis of this land of “just and equal dealing” as “fine, new Hampshire bacon and fine Yorkshire hams,” than are received from those counties altogether; and that though the bacon merchants are supplied with bacon from Ireland, none sellIrishbacon. The large Irish hams are also dried and sold for “fine fresh” Yorkshire or Westmoreland varieties, to tickle the fancy of the “Bull Family” for rarities and expensive purchases.
The usual sophistication of milk is a liberal quantity of warm water, and to give consistence to the mixture, and correct the colour, a composition of flour and yolks of eggs is added; but should there not have been sufficient time for the operation, the immediate aid of the cock or the pump is invoked. But some of the more skilfully initiated “artistes au lait” dissolve the common cheese dye, annatto, which occasions a mixture of milk and water to assume the colour, and nearly the consistence of cream. Among some of the less expert a composition of treacle and salt supplies the place of the annatto; but this mixture does not combine so well as the annatto with the milk. Pure milk is of a dull white colour, and a soft sweetish taste; adulterated milk is of a bluish appearance and thin consistence.
Cream receives a copious addition of skimmed milk, flour, starch, rice-powder, or arrow-root boiled together, to increase the “milk-merchant’s” profits. But arrow-root is the substance which is best adapted, and most employed for the purpose. The generally received opinion that milk is adulterated with chalk and whitening is, as Mr. Accum observes, erroneous; for neither of those ingredients could be held in solution in the milk, and would therefore be useless to the adulterator, as theywould sink to the bottom of the pail while the manufacturer was doling out his composition to his customers. But the practice of putting the milk into leaden pans, or vessels made of that metal, to occasion the milk to throw up a larger portion of cream, is sufficiently authenticated, and deserves exposure, from the liability of having the milk impregnated with particles of lead.
Perhaps some of my readers may be lovers of curds and whey; if so, I recommend them to endeavour to get a sight of the calf’s maw, from which the rennet is made before it is boiled. I have had the fortune of being “blessed” with “the captivating sight” more than once; and in each instance I absolutely saw the bladder moving alive with maggots.
Even the humble green-grocer exerts his ingenuity and “tact” in the art of sophistication: to augment the weight of his “murphies,” and “make themtell,” he soaks “the dearcratures” in water during the night previous to their sale.
While discoursing of the little peccadilloes of the honest tradesmen of “this land of Christianity,” I never apprehended that it was possible to sophisticate fruit. But at the very moment I was about to consummate my bold, and I hope it will prove, patriotic undertaking, by affixing the important and consolatory, though little word, “Finis,” a new discovery presented itself to my astonished optics! Can you believe me, John? I happened to pop in rather inopportunely, that is to say, a-la-mode Paul Pry, on a fruit-artist, who was preparing some stale plums for sale, and giving them all the bloom and fragrance of having been just plucked from the tree. This recondite feat offruitist-ingenuity consists in anointing certain parts of the fruit with gum water, and then shaking a muslin bag containing finely powdered blue upon the prepared parts of the fruit, which are laid uppermost upon a board, to receive the precious unction.—From the honest tradesman whom I thus found patriotically engaged in furthering “the trading and commercial interests of his dear native land,” I also learned that some of the more skilful and enterprizing artists soak plums in water, when they have become shrivelled, in order to plump them out, and make them, as it is fashionably phrased, en-bon-point.
What an age of intellect do we live in! Could our good old Druidical ancestors have supposed that their puny and degenerate offspring would be endowed with the extraordinary gift of being able to rejuvenize old worm-eaten nuts? Rare and sublime discovery! What, John, may we not next expect? Surely, we have reached the millenium of the march of intellect and the perfection of sophistication. But I must not keep the reader longer in suspense.
The rejuvenization of Old Nuts! Just as I had finished writing the above article, an old and almost forgotten friend called on me, one who has long and scientifically been patriotically engaged, “in this age of intellect,” in rejuvenizing old, rotten, worm-eaten walnuts and almonds, of each last year’s growth, and giving their “externals” all the whiteness and beauty of the lily-white hand of a “fine lady,” and their “internals” all the plumpness and en-bon-point admired by his “most moral majesty,” our late “gracious and beloved sovereign,” in his “fair defects of nature.” By this scion of “the trading interests” I am informed that old nuts of all kinds are first soaked in water in order to plump them out, and then they are fumigated with sulphur for the purpose of rendering the shells white and clean.
The confectionary-artist is not behind his compeers in trade in the honourable vocation of sophistication. There are few articles which owe their paternity to his handy-work, that partake wholly of the ingredients to which they bear resemblance in name and appearance: all, almost all, here is the work of “the black art.”
But this is not the worst part of the business. Were any person to be admitted into the “elaboratorical pandemonium” of a pastry-cook or a confectioner—were he to see the disgusting appearance of the vessels in which they manufacture their articles—many of them containing the ingredients with perfect rims of cupreous matter surrounding them—were he to regale his eyes with the sight of the most rancid butter bleaching for the purpose of making pastry, as I have seen, I am sure that he would hold the productions of the confectioner and pastry-cook’s shop in abhorrence, and would not consider Dr. Paris’s denunciation of them, in his useful work on Diet, p. 247, as “an abomination.” A lady with whom I am acquainted, and who lodged at different times in the houses of confectioners and pastry-cooks, had so good an opportunity of witnessingthe cleanliness and wholesomenessof their operations, that for manyyears she has not tasted any commodity that comes out of their manufactories; and I verily believe that she would die of hunger before she could induce herself to allow a scrap of theirdelicaciesto enter her mouth.
But these “artists” not only endanger the health and lives of their customers by the carelessness and nastiness of their conduct in their compositions, but they employ preparations of copper, and also of red lead in colouring their fancy sweet-meats. In the preparations of sugar-plumbs, comfits, and other kinds of confectionary, especially those sweat-meats of inferior quality, frequently exposed to sale in the open-streets, for the allurement of children, Mr. Accum, p. 288, informs us, that the greatest abuses are committed by means of powerful poisons. The white comfits, called sugar-peas, are chiefly composed of a mixture of sugar, starch and Cornish clay (a species of very white pipe-clay); and the red sugar drops are usually coloured with the inferior kinds of vermillion or sap green, and often, instead of those pigments, with red lead and copper. As a yellow colour, cromate of lead is used, and prussiate of iron as a blue. The stuff called “hard rock,” “hard bake,” “white lollypop,” and other baby attracting names, is of an equally deleterious quality. Nor are the ginger-bread or sweet cakes of the ginger-baker less injurious to the health of children, especially the “gilt ginger-bread” as it is termed, which is covered with Dutch leaf,—a composition consisting of an alloy of copper and zinc, or brass and copper. Indeed, all parents should, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” observes, anxiously instruct their children never to buy any thing offered for sale in the streets: among my acquaintance more instances than one have occurred in which lamentable results would have been the consequence had not timely aid been afforded the little sufferers. And for the same reason it seems necessary to caution parents never to give painted toys (which are always coloured with red lead, verdigris, and other potent poisons,) to children, who are apt to put every thing, especially if it gives them pleasure, into their mouths.
The mischievous consequences occasioned by the use of sugar confectionary, coloured with metallic and vegetable poisons, are provided against by the French Government, by being under the surveillance branch of the police, entitled the Council of Health, by whom an ordonnance is issued, that no confectionary shall be sold, unless wrapped up in paper, stamped with the name and address of the confectioner; and the ordonnance further provides that the vendors shall be held responsible for all accidents occasioned by confectionary sold in their shops. M. Chevallier has, in the Journal de Chimie Médicale for Jan. 1831, discussed this subject with considerable ability.
“The foreign conserves, such as small green limes, citron, hop-tops, plumbs, angelica roots, &c. imported into this country, and usually sold in round chip boxes, are frequently impregnated with copper.” Indeed, mostof thedelicaciesand “good things” to be obtained in confectioner’s shops, are tinted with all the colours of the rainbow, by the agency of lead, copper, brass, arsenic, or some other poisonous metal.
The presence of lead and copper is readily detected by pouring liquid ammonia over the article suspected of being adulterated with the first mentioned metal, which will acquire a blue colour; and sulphuretted hydrogen, acidulated with muriatic acid, where the second article is suspected to have been made use of in the adulteration, when the article will assume a dark brown or black colour. The adulteration by means of clay may be ascertained by dissolving the suspected article in boiling water, when the sediment or precipitate at the bottom of the vessel ready discovers the fraud.
For the purpose of communicating an almond or a kernel flavour to custards, blanc-mange, and other productions of his art, and to render them grateful to the palates of his customers, the pastry-cook flavours them with the leaves of the poisonous plant, the cherry-laurel. And the basis of his favourite blanc-mange often consists of the shreds of the dried bladders of horses, the skins of soles, and other animal membranes, as cheap substitutes for isinglass. Among his less objectionable sophistications may be mentioned, his fabrication of creams, custards, tarts, and other kinds of pastry, from rice powder and skimmed milk.
The negus and lemonade made by pastry-cooks, and the punch of public and coffee-houses, are made of tartaric acid, as a cheap substitute for citric or lemon acid.
The perfumers, the keepers of the “emporiums and bazaars of fashion,” the manufacturers of the “best genuine bears’ grease,” of the “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of the “Kalydors”—of “Les Cosmetiques Royales”—of the “Red and White Olympian Dews,” and other prodigiously grand and etymological titles “breathing the spirit of patriotic rivalry,” have all exerted their respective wits in the art of economising expense and “saving a penny.” In fact the tooth-powders, the dentrifices, the ottars of roses, the musks, the cosmetics, the lotions, the balsams, the Hungary waters, the Eaus de Cologne, as well as all the other frenchifiedeaus, themilksandcreamsof roses, the pomades divines, the blooms, the pearl-waters, the lip-salves, the perfumes,—the Naples almond and beautifying soaps,—the cephalic, Macouba, and other-hard named snuffs, are all vile sophistications, and (to omit speaking of their injurious properties to the health and the skin,) contain but little of the ingredients of which the artists profess that they are made. On this subject I shall address myself especially to my fair readers: craving leave to premise, that it is strange that British ladies, to whom Nature has been so bountiful, should destroy their native charms and have recourse to the wretched substitutes of art, whichare destructive of beauty, andproduce real deformity.
As many ladies attempt to improve their complexionsby the use of the pernicious cosmetics, which are continually and unblushingly advertised as beautifiers of the skin, most of which are either worthless or dangerous, (for if they have any effect, it is that of conveying mercury, lead, or bismuth into the system, and too frequently laying the foundation of diseases which are often dangerous, and sometimes fatal;) I cannot refrain from advising those “fair ones” who have been in the habit of using trash of so villainous a nature, that if they have any of it by them, to throw it away at once, and to be persuaded that the best cosmetics are exercise in the open air, an active attention to social and domestic duties, regular hours of repose at night, and cheerful hilarity and tranquility of mind, and that those cheap andwholesomeremedies will not, as the author of “The Toilette Companion” well observes, fail to animate their countenances and beautify their complexions beyond the blooms and the balsams, the Grecian and the Egyptian Waters, the Kalydors and the Macassar Oils, the Gowland’s Lotions and the Pearl Powders, the Cosmetiques Royales, the Red and White Olympian Dews, the Essences, the Eaus, and the Pomades Divines, the Essences Apolloniennes or Tyrian, and the Tonic Wines, and all the other puffed and delusive nostrums, that knavery, cupidity, and effrontery, have ever palmed upon a credulous public, by which dull and lustreless eyes, sallow and shrivelled skins, lifeless and cloudy complexions, and impaired and ruined health, are infallibly super-induced:or those simple and easily purchased ingredients, with a strict attention to cleanliness, that is, well washing the skin every day, and drying it with a course towel,—or when the head, neck, or face perspire, rubbing it dry with a towel of the like description, will, as the author of “The Oracle of Health and Long Life” says, more effectually beautify the complexion, preserve the skin pure, soft, and pervious, and consequently the health firm and unaffected, than all the frauds that have ever been contrived to cheat and deceive the unwary or the inexperienced. Cold water, however, should not be used when the skin is warm, nor very warm water when it is chilled. For as the author of that clever little work “The Toilette Companion, orThe whole Art of Beauty and of Dressing,” says, “Many a beautiful face, neck, and arm, have been spoiled by not observing this caution.”
I have mentioned the dangerous consequences from the use of the repellent cosmetics and other quack nostrums puffed off in the newspapers; but, as example is more convincing than precept, I shall present my readers with a few cases of their lamentable results, which fell under the observation of the celebrated Dr. Darwin.
“Mrs. S. being much troubled with pimples, applied an alum poultice to her face, which was soon followed by a stroke of the palsy, and terminated in her death. Mrs. L. applied to her face for pimples a quack nostrum, supposed to be some preparation of lead. Soonafter she was seized with epileptic fits, which ended in palsy and caused her death. Mr. Y. applied a preparation of lead to his nose to remove pimples, and it brought on palsy on one side of his face. Miss S. an elegant young lady, applied a cosmetic lotion to her face for small red pimples. This produced inflammation of the liver, which required repeated bleedings with purgatives to remove. As soon as the inflammation was subdued, the pimples re-appeared.” (Darwin’s Zoonomia.) Every person could enlarge this catalogue from the sphere of his own acquaintance.
I am willing to believe that I have (to use a legal phrase) made out a sufficient case to prove the inefficacy, nay thedangerousconsequences of cosmetics, and the rest of the long list of et-ceteras forbeautifyingthe skin. It will now be my duty to direct my attention to the other frauds and impositions practised under the titles of “hair strengtheners”—“hair beautifyers”—of “best genuine bears’ grease”—of “incomparable Macassar Oils”—of “Pommades Divines,”—and the remaining hair hoaxes and humbugs, played off as hair oils, Russia oils, and similar puffed nostrums, under pretty andtakingtitles, by Prince, Ross and Son, M’Alpine, and the rest of the bear’s grease and hair-oil men; and I shall feel a singular pleasure should I be the medium of saving any “lovely or loveable woman” from becoming the dupe of imposture and deception.
Amongst the various cosmetics recommended by theadventurer for the dressing room, it must be admitted that none seems more harmless than those which profess to give a fine curl to the hair. But to assert that any liquid will, of itself, give a permanent or temporary curl to the hair is fallacious; though it is true that the application of a weak soap lye, or a solution of caustic potash, will render the hair more susceptible of adopting the artificial curl given by putting it into papers. But then it must be recollected that the effect occasioned by soap lye or potash is only produced by a complete alteration of the organic structure of the hair, superinducing a slow but certain destruction of that beautiful ornament of the human head. This effect may not be immediately observed, either in youth or in advanced life; but it is certain and inevitable.
Equally destructive are the various liquid dyes so loudly boasted of, and extensively advertised, by quacks for colouring the hair; some of them, indeed, do produce the effect proposed, particularly the black dyes; but they are allinjurious, especially the black, as their basis consists always of nitrate of silver, (that is, silver dissolved in nitric acid or aqua-fortis) or lunar caustic when in a dry state; but the operation is destructive of the hair, as must be evident to any one who has seen the effect of caustic on warts on the skin. It has been well said that if we wish to save our hair, we must first save our money, by abstaining from the whole list of those puffed and unprincipled recipes and nostrums that stare us inthe face in every newspaper, and in almost every shop-window.
The folly of giving credence to any of the impudent and disgraceful impostures for the pretended power of certain ingredients to change the colour of the hair, must, as the author ofThe Toilette Companionobserves, be evident to every person when he is told that the hair depends on a peculiar secretion, and that, when that secretion ceases, which it does from several causes, as grief, fright, ill health, great mental exertion, age, &c. the hair becomes grey: “for Nature, like a provident mother, when she feels the powers of life impaired or decaying, exerts all her energies to support and preserve the vital organs, and can no longer, from her limited means, supply the outposts and ornamental parts of the system as before, which therefore suffer and are sacrificed.”
Nor are the deceits of the base nostrum-mongers for making the hair grow and curl, or for making the bald pericranium of a nonagenarian vegetate in all the luxuriance of rejuvenization, the only frauds practised: equally destructive are the advertised depilatories, the general basis of which is yellow orpiment, a certain poison if taken inwardly. It is true that the Turks, with whom bald heads are in fashion, and also the Chinese, do use this as an unguent, to save the trouble of frequent shaving; but it should be recollected that those cosmetics which may be harmless on the head of a robust Janissary,—of a bashaw of three tails or a fat Mandarin,do not necessarily become fit adjuncts for the toilette of a “British fair,”—“the lovely daughters of Albion, Erin, or Scotia,” or even that of an “Herculean delicate,” a Lilliputian dandy, or a Bond-street exquisite.
Snuff-sniffers and tobacco-munchers and puffers, do ye know what the delectable ingredients which form part of the articles of your recreation, are? Have you never heard that snuff is often compounded of pulverised nut-shells, of the powder of old rotten wood, called powder post; that the colour is improved by ochre, and the appearance and feel modified by an addition of treacle or urine? And have you never been told that the pungency of snuff is increased by the agency of powdered glass or the muriate of ammonia? Tobacco smokers and “chawers,” have ye never been told that your favourite “quid” is often composed of black hellebore, corrosive sublimate, dried dock-leaves, and a variety of otherinnocentingredients? Oh, dear! what a deal you have yet to learn before you “become wise as serpents!”
Devoted to disease by baker, butcher, grocer, wine-merchant, spirit-dealer, cheesemonger, pastry-cook, and confectioner; the physician is called to our assistance; but here again the pernicious system of fraud, as it has given the blow, steps in to defeat the remedy;—the unprincipled dealers in drugs and medicines exert the most diabolical ingenuity in sophisticating the most potent and necessary drugs, (viz. peruvian bark, rhubarb, ipecacuanha, magnesia, calomel, castor-oil, spirits of hartshorn, and almost every other chemical preparation in general demand;) and chemical preparations used in pharmacy; and the fraud has increased to so alarming an extent, says Mr. Accum, and his assertion is borne out by the experience of every one familiar with chemistry, that nine-tenths of the drugs and medicines in use that are vended by dealers, even of respectability and reputation, according to the usual interpretation of those words, “and who would,” as that gentleman emphatically expresses himself, “be thelastto be suspected,”are adulterated. And what tends to aggravate theevil is that manufactories and mills on “an amazingly large scale” are constantly at work in this metropolis for the manufacture of spurious drugs. From these licensed elaboratories of disease, the adulterated articles are vended to unprincipled druggists, at less than a third of the price of the genuine article. And as there are no certain tests or methods of detecting the fraud, the consequence is, that the physician’s prescription is rendered useless, and the most consummate skill often baffled in the subjection of disease. Some idea of the extent of the adulteration of drugs may be formed, when it is stated that a spurious peruvian bark is sometimes sold, compounded of mahogany saw-dust and oak-wood, ground into powder, with a proper proportion of genuine quinquina; and that magnesia, even the calcined sort, is adulterated with lime.
Chemical cunning has even contrived to extract the quinquina, in which consists the whole virtue of the bark, leaving it a completely inert mass. And even the quinine itself is sophisticated, being frequently contaminated with lime, tallow, sugar, and sulphate of cinchonas.
It is necessary also to make some little inquiry, and use some little exercise of one’s understanding, in ascertaining for what reasons certain physicians recommend particular druggists, and particular drugs which are manufactured by the “said particular” druggists. Dr. Reece, in his Monthly Gazette of Health for August 1829, has tended to open one’s eyes a little on the subject. He informs us that the late Ambrose Godfrey, the nostrum-monger, contrived to get his preparation of arrow-root into notice and sale at double the price for which it might have been obtained of any other druggist, by accompanying samples of his commodity with presents of haunches of venison to certain physicians, and that by judicious repetitions (“neither few nor far between”) of the said conciliating haunches of venison, he contrived to maintain the reputation and supposed superiority of the said arrow-root, and to keep the monopoly to himself, as all the said learned and grateful physicians always, as in due allegiance and duty they were bound, recommended the said Godfrey Ambrose’s arrow-root as superior to that of all other simple wights, who supposed that their composition of arrow-root could be good for any thing, if they forgot, or were not able, to give character to the commodities by means of the mute but irresistible influence or eloquence of the said judiciously disposed-of haunches of venison. From this account it appears that the “sons of Galen” and the artificers of “the pestle and mortar” are not behind their brethren of “the long robe,” and “of the quill and parchment tribe” in the “art ofhuggery.” How often has a “learned barrister” contrived to get into the good graces of an attorney and secured practice by invitations to dinner, and judiciously and well timed (for few persons are better versed in the art of throwing a sprat to catch a whale than a hungry and briefless, and it must be admitted, often highly gifted barrister;) presents of game, by a hearty and unseen shake of the hand in the street, which he dared not have given at Westminster Hall, andby all those ingenious means, to which men of great talent have before now condescended, and by which men of little talent have sometimes gained considerable fortunes.
Nor has the spirit of adulteration allowed even the accredited patent or quack medicines to escape its ingenuity. Dr. James’s Fever Powders, and Norris’s Fever Drops, besides a variety of other popular receipts, are to be obtained in all possible degrees of strength and flavours from the various venders and manufacturers of the articles.
Even the simple articles arrow-root, worm-seed, Spanish liquorice, lemon acid, soda water, lozenges, honey, spermaceti, and a long list of other commodities in general use, receive thebenefitof the sophisticators’ ingenuity.
The greater part of the commodity sold under the name of arrow-root in the shops of the druggists and grocers is prepared from the fecula or starch of wheat and of dry mealy potatoes, with a portion of arrow-root. When good, the grains of arrow-root are very fine, with numbers of little clots which are formed by the aggregation of the minuter grains while the commodity is drying, and when examined by a magnifying glass appear pearly and very brilliant.
The seeds of the tansy are often offered for sale, for worm-seed; but the moreconscientiousdealer sometimes treats his customers with an equal portion of the genuine and the adulterated article.
The Spanish liquorice juice of the shops is generallycomposed of the worst kind of gum arabic, called Indian or Barbary gum, and imported chiefly for the purpose of making shoe-blacking, with a small portion of the genuine juice; and the factitious composition, when inspissated, is formed into rolls, resembling the genuine article imported from Catalonia, nicely sprinkled or stratified with particles of dry bay-leaves, and skilfully impressed with the word “Solaz,” in the true cast of Spanish engraving.Refinedliquorice is frequently manufactured from Spanish juice, with an equal quantity of carpenters’ glue or starch. The specimens of genuine juice are generally small, perfectly black, brittle, and break with a smooth and glassy fracture. They are also soluble either in the mouth or in water, without leaving any residue.
The lemon acid of commerce is, as I have before said, a counterfeit; tartareous acid being employed as a cheap substitute for lemon or citric acid.
The soda-water on general sale is frequently contaminated with copper and lead, produced from the action of the carbonic acid contained in the water on the metallic substances of which the apparatus in which it is made is constructed.
The lozenges of all varieties, hues, flavours, and qualities, particularly those in the composition of which ginger, cream of tartar, magnesia, &c. are used, are sophisticated with a liberal portion of pipe-clay, as a cheap substitution for sugar; but this fraud is readily detected by laying one of the suspected lozenges on the pan of a fire shovel or sheet of iron made red-hot; when, if it bepure, it will readily take fire and be consumed, but if it be adulterated, it will burn feebly, and a hard strong substance will remain, resembling the lozenge in form.
It is well known that but little genuine honey can be obtained in London. The tests of good honey are its fragrance and sweetness. When it is suspected to be adulterated with starch or bean flour, the fraud may be discovered by dissolving the honey in cold water, when the flour will be readily seen, as it will not dissolve, but falls to the bottom of the vessel in powder. If honey thus adulterated be exposed to heat, it soon solidifies and becomes tenacious.
Honey is of three kinds; the first, calledvirgin honey, and which is of the finest flavour, is of a whitish cast, and in a fluid state, about the consistence of a syrup. The second is that known by the name ofwhite honey, and its texture is almost solid. The third kind is the common yellow honey, obtained from the combs, by heating them over the fire, or by dipping them into hot water, and then pressing them.
Manna is sometimes counterfeited by a composition of sugar and honey, mixed with a small portion of scammony.
The adulteration of spermaceti is generally effected with wax; but the fraud may be detected by the smell of the adulterating ingredient, and by the dulness of the colour; whereas pure spermaceti is of a semitransparent crystalline appearance. It is also said that a preparation of the oil obtained from the tail of the whale is likewise vendedfor genuine spermaceti; but, as this factitious commodity assumes a yellow shade when exposed to the air, this imposition is also of easy detection.
The adulteration of the essential oils obtained from the more expensive spices is so common, that, as Mr. Accum says, “it is not easy to meet with any that are fit for use,” and so much subtle ingenuity is made use of in the sophistications, that no known tests or agents exist for the detection of the fraud. The only certain tests are the taste or flavour, and the smell.
It is worth while to attend to the plausible excuses of the respective “artists” of these sophistications. They allege that they are obliged to have recourse to the fraud, to meet the fancies “of those clever persons in their own conceit who are fond of haggling, and insist on buying better bargains than other people, shutting their eyes to the defects of an article, so that they can enjoy the delight of getting it cheap; and secondly, for those persons, who being but bad paymasters, yet as the manufacturer, for his own credit-sake, cannot charge more than the usual price of the articles, he thinks himself therefore authorized to adulterate it in value, to make up for the risk he runs, and the long credit he gives;”—they therefore are reduced to the necessity of keeping, as they term it, “reduced articles,” and genuine ones. This is excellent logic, and no doubt well understood by the whole sophisticating tribe. The public are indebted to Dr. T. Lloyd for this information, which he communicated to the Literary Gazette, No. 146.
The ready methods or tests for ascertaining the good qualities of the most common drugs are:
Castor-oil, when good, is of a light amber or straw colour, inclining to a greenish cast. That which has the least smell, taste, and colour, is considered the mildest. The necessity of some attention to these signs may appear, when I state that I once took seven ounces of this oil in successive doses, and do verily believe that I might have continued to this present hour taking, daily, the usual dose furnished from the same quarter, with as little effect, had not my good genius directed me to send for an ounce from Apothecaries’ Hall. I recommend my readers to purchase their drugs, &c. in the same place.
Ipecacuanha.—As this drug is sold to the public in a pulverized state, there is no short or off-hand test for discovering its purity. It is adulterated with emetic tartar.
Opium.—Good opium in a concrete state should be of a blackish brown colour, of a strong fetid smell, a hard viscous texture, and heavy; and when rubbed between the finger and thumb, it is perfectly free from roughness or grittiness. This drug is liable to great adulteration, being frequently vitiated with cow-dung, or a powder composed of the dry leaves and stalks of the poppy, the gum of the mimosa, meal and other substances. The flavour alone indicates the goodness of opium in a liquid state.
Rhubarb.—The marks of the goodness of rhubarbare the liveliness of its colour when cut; its being firm, dry, and solid, but not flinty or hard; its being easily pulverizable, and appearing, when powdered, of a fine bright yellow colour; and its imparting to the spittle, when chewed, a deep saffron-colour, and not proving slimy or mucilaginous to the taste. When rhubarb has become worm-eaten, druggist-ingenuity is called into play, by filling up the holes with a paste made of rhubarb-powder and mucilage; and then the physic-artists roll the mended pieces in the finest rhubarb powder to give their handy works a good colour and an appearance of freshness.
Senna leaves are frequently mixed and sophisticated with leaves of argol, box leaves, &c.
But among the frauds and impositions practised on the public, none are more odious and unprincipled, and, at the same time, more loudly call for the prompt and active interference of the Legislature, than the tricks and effrontery of impostors, quacks, and empirics in medicine, both regular and irregular. It cannot but have been the frequent subject of regret to every honest and reflecting person that this vile trade should receivea legal sanction and protection, which it most assuredly does by virtue of the stamp duty imposed on the villainous trash; and it cannot be sufficiently deplored that any government should find itself reduced to straits so deplorable, or be so short-sighted in its views of enlightened policy, as to be under the necessity of extracting a paltry and disgraceful profitto the revenue of the state, from the tolerance and encouragement of ignorance, imposture, and mischief.
The assertion is true, that those pests of society the charlatans and nostrum-mongers “quarter” themselves only on the ignorance and credulity of mankind, and that their patrons and supporters are wealthy but ignorant men, and superstitious old women, or profligate and thoughtless rakes; but this is a miserable excuse, and but lame kind of reasoning: if it means any thing, it proves the necessity of public protection from the abominable and anti-christian nuisance. Can there be greater libel on the utility and operation of English law, than that vermin of the description of the “Balsam of Rackasiri” empirics[M]should be tolerated and allowed to spread their mischief and destruction among the population of a country professing Christianity and civilization, and forsooth, to boast of “the thousands they payyearly to the government and the public press,” in the form of duty to the one forits sanction and licence, and to the other in the form of remuneration for giving a disgraceful and destructive publicity to their nefarious designs.[N]
Nor is the absence of a proper discrimination between right and wrong of a certain prating brazen-faced
“barrister” less reprehensible. I love and venerate “the Bar;” but I must be free to say that when a man can be found so devoid of just and proper feeling as to appear, for the paltry remuneration of a few pounds, or foranyremuneration however large, in the defence and propagation ofnaked and disgusting fraud and peculation—aye, andthe secret and wide-spreading destruction of health and lifetoo!—it evidently proves that there are some members of that distinguished profession who are not possessed of the high and honourable feelings which belong to those who are gentlemen by birth and breeding, scholars by education, and Christians and honourable men from moral and religious feeling. But it is to be hoped that there will never occur again a similar exhibition to that which took place at Marlborough-street on the infamous Rackasiri-balsam fraud, practised on Miss May, by “thelearned graduatesof Petticoat-lane,” and “regularly bred physicians,” the Jew pedlars and old clothesmen “ofwonderful abilities,” the “Doctors” C. and J. Jordan; who “feelawkwardnessin recommending to public notice theiruncommon discoveries and talents.” The more I consider that transaction, the more I am satisfied that the magistrates are to blame for having allowed the piece of impudent effrontery and imposture to have had the semblance of their sanction, by their singular taciturnity which happened on that occasion. Of the newspapers which gave currency and circulation to the artful and fiend-likeexculpation, language will not afford terms strong enough to express one’s abhorrence and indignation. O shame! where is thy blush? How much human misery and destruction has the insertion of those disgraceful and wicked puffs occasioned, by inducing the weak and credulous to give credit to that as a piece of intelligence coming from editors of accredited and impartial journals, which is merely the contrivance and fabrication of wicked impostors to delude and ensnare the thoughtless and unsuspecting; and for the giving of its mischievous publicity, the proprietors and editors of certain newspapers received large sums of money. But let those thoughtless men reflect, that it is the very consummation of cruelty and unprincipled conduct to sanction the infamous tampering with the lives and happiness of one’s fellow creatures for the mere sake of lucre. Nor is the conduct of the magistrates of certain police offices (particularly those to whom the jurisdiction of the city of London is entrusted) less reprehensible, and less fraught with mischievous consequences. What! ought the frauds and murderous designs of the basest miscreants alive to receive the solemn and imposing sanction and authority of an oath made before a judicial tribunal? Surely a grosser violation of duty and a more stupid and reckless indifference to the destruction of human health and life, were never, in the most barbarous country, and the most uncivilized age, exhibited, than the want of sense and foresight displayed by some city-magistrates in allowing affidavits to be made beforethem of the “wonderful cures” performed on the deluded and perjuredagentsand “stalking horses” of the empirics and impostors; but, fortunately for mankind, the culpable act will ever remain on record as a stigma and reproach of city-legislation and moral economy. The trade oflegalizedpoisoning and destruction of public health has received greater and more effectual help and recommendation from that source than from all the arts and devices of the impostors, though aided by the sanction of a government duty, and the disgusting and unprincipled puffs and paragraphs of a certain portion of the public press. To put an end to these culpable and mischievous proceedings, either on the part of magistrates or of editors of newspapers, in future, I wish those gentlemen to bear in mind that their “misdoings” shall entitle them to a “niche and an escutcheon of immortality” in the pages of “Deadly Adulteration and Slow Poisoning Unmasked;”
“If there’s a hole in a’ your coats,E’en from Land’s End to John o’Groats,I’d rede ye tent it;A chiel’s amang you taking notes,And faith he’ll prent it:”
“If there’s a hole in a’ your coats,E’en from Land’s End to John o’Groats,I’d rede ye tent it;A chiel’s amang you taking notes,And faith he’ll prent it:”
“If there’s a hole in a’ your coats,E’en from Land’s End to John o’Groats,I’d rede ye tent it;A chiel’s amang you taking notes,And faith he’ll prent it:”
“If there’s a hole in a’ your coats,
E’en from Land’s End to John o’Groats,
I’d rede ye tent it;
A chiel’s amang you taking notes,
And faith he’ll prent it:”
and that no threats or intimidations of “actions” and “reparations due to the wounded feelings of gentlemen,” shall deter me from my duty. If I should offend, of course the courts of justice are open to every injuredman, and he will most assuredly receive his due measure of justice there; but should I give that offence for which the “law of the land” affords no redress, the man of honourable feelings and conduct shall never have to complain of my backwardness to give a most prompt and satisfactory reparation; but, at the same time, I wish that those who have been privy, whether by overt or covert acts—whether from their love of “filthy lucre,” or their natural propensity to fraud—to the destruction of the lives or health of their fellow-creatures, to recollect that I shall be prepared to treat them with the scorn and contempt which their conduct and their misdeeds may merit.
It has been well said that it is not easy to determine whether the fraud and impudence of the empiric or nostrum-monger, or the folly and credulity of the sufferer, are the greater. But the fact is that quacks and impostors of all kinds, whether medical or political,pædagoguecalorcorporational, live and thrive on the infernal popish maxim, thatignorance is the mother of devotion, that is, in plainer phrase—ofgullibility. But to the case of the quacks.—It surely indicates no ordinary share of dupery, to believe that one and the same nostrum can cure all and every disorder contained in the long catalogue of human woes and miseries; such a belief must incline the victim of its hallucination to suppose an exact similarity of symptoms and a perfect identity of nature in all the disorders to which the frailty of our common nature has rendered ussubject. On this momentous subject few persons have written more forcibly than the admirable author of the “Manual for Invalids.” May the following quotation from that valuable work awaken the attention of those who foolishly confide their health and lives to the care of quacks, nostrum-mongers, jugglers, and impostors![O]
“Where dwells the boasted march of intellect when the understanding is continually insulted with the most impudent and daring pretensions of impostors, who, while they pretend to restore your health, are making a direct attack upon your credulity and your purse. What encouragement exists for the well educated men,regular graduates of Universities, of high classical and literary attainments, who have chosen the profession of medicine or surgery as a business of life, and in order to practice with credit and character, have directed their attention, their time, and their property to its studies,—who have made the nature of diseases and the efficacy of remedies a study of life—when they find themselvescompletely superseded by some inspired pretender—some ignorant quack. Lord Bacon has long since said, in his work on the advancement of learning, ‘If the same honours and rewards are given to fools, which ought to be awarded to the wise, who will labour to be wise?’ That the ignorant pretender should be encouraged by the public, is a reproach to the understanding of any people; but that the revenue of any country should be supplied by a stamp duty[P]on empirical nostrums, instead of the government taking measures either of prevention or punishment, can only be explainedby exhibiting similar acts of atrocity on the sentiments of nature; but the truth is, the auri sacra fames has the power of making that appear relatively right, which is absolutely wrong.”[Q]
“Beware of hypocrisy of every description,” adds the same excellent writer; “you may as well believe that the Pope can send you to perdition, as that an advertising charlatan can, by any empirical nostrum, restore you to health.”
But, unhappily, it appears that poor John Bull and “his hopeful family” are not gifted with the power of being “beware of hypocrisy,” “advertising charlatans” and “empirical nostrums;” but that through their proneness to gullibility and the love of the marvellous, the trade of quackery is daily increasing, and that hundreds of quacks swarm in every quarter of the metropolis, and fatten onthe murders which they are constantly perpetrating with their poisons; and to add to the monstrous combination against the lives and health of the community, that the aid of even the pulpit is invoked to further the propagation of the imposture! Instances are on record where mercenary preachers have been wicked enough to sermonize and expatiate on the miraculous virtues and benefits of the poisonous nostrums[R]and remedies of the mountebank jugglers and impostors.
But humbug and imposture, as it has been truly said, is a many-headed monster, and is of very catching influence; it has worshippers at the corner of every street; hordes of the most ignorant vagabonds and jugglers are engaged in its propagation, and announce their impostures as “prepared and sanctioned by His Majesty’s august authority;” but to waste my pages with the mention of the “ladies’ fever”doctorsLamert, Peede, Davis, Eady, Caton, Courtenay, (alias Messrs. Currie and Co.) Fiedeberg (alias Sloane and Co. alias Jones and Co.);—the surreptitious knights, His Carpentership, Sir Gully Daniels, and his Plastership, White Arsenic Sir Cancer Aldis;—the firm of Goss and Company, the consulting Surgeons of Ægis and Hygeiene notoriety;—the miniature painter, “the learned and celebrated” artful artist and curer of consumption, Long St. Long,—the crazy chap who entitles himself the “hygeist”[S]—Taylorand Son, the Leake’s pill-men,—Samuel, the syphilis-pill-man,—the old canting staymaker and life-guardsman, Gardner, who can manufacture tape-worms wholesale and of a league in length from the intestines of cats andchickens,—the piddle-taster, or morning water-doctor, Cameron (alias Crumples,) as also all other quacks, whether of the masculine or feminine gender, who cureby proxy, or by simply pronouncing that the diseaseshall be cured, (for there have been impostors impudent enough to make such pretensions;) or by any art or delusion, and who by chalk, chuckling, and chicanery are battening on the vitals of society, would be an insult tothe understanding of my readers, further than to say that each of those worthies, as well as their honourable compeers the balsam of Rackasiri vagabonds and impostors, can, no doubt, recognize the reality of their deeds in the following quotation from the pages of Hudibras: