"Come into the drawing-room," said Constance, "it's warmer there. I don't know why the dining-room should be so chilly."
"We'll set the stove going to-morrow," said Van der Welcke.
His face had brightened up out of recognition.
"Let's see how you're looking, old chap."
He, the father, was so much excited that the tears came to Addie's eyes. The others left the two of them together in the drawing-room with Van der Welcke while in the dimly-lighted dining-room the old woman seemed to be asleep.
"How are you, my boy?"
"Very well indeed, Dad."
"And now ... you're staying here?"
"Yes, I'm staying ... with all of you."
"Yes, this is your home.... And your wife?"
"We shall see. That will settle itself."
"So ... there's nothing certain yet ... about Mathilde?"
"No, nothing certain.... I write to her once a month; she writes rather oftener ... about the children. She's very good to them."
"So ... no talk of a divorce?"
"No, no talk of that.... Perhaps, later, all will come right between us. Perhaps, on the other hand, she will feel that she would sooner be free ... in spite of the children."
They both thought of Erzeele.
"So you don't know anything yet?"
"No, not yet. It will settle itself. It must settle itself some day."
"You see, my boy, I'm different. In your place, I should have fought a duel with Erzeele. I should have had a divorce ... if my wife didn't care for me, if she cared for Erzeele."
"Yes, Father, I know, that's you. I'm different."
"You're better."
"No, not better. But, whatever I may be, I am first of all your son."
"You, my son? You're my friend, my pal; always have been."
"And suppose I now wanted to be ... your son? I have come back feeling very sad and very tired, because I feel that I am much to blame."
"Nothing has happened?"
"No."
"What has happened? Nothing at all. You're too fond of thinking. What you have to do now is to seek your own happiness. Just selfishly."
"Perhaps ... if I can. Perhaps that will become Mathilde's happiness too. We shall see. But I don't feel certain of myself. I don't know things. And I now feel ... not your friend and pal but your son, Father. I seem to feel it for the first time."
"You always used to know things."
"For you, Daddie, and for Mamma. But now, now...."
"Now you're my son."
"Yes."
"My big boy."
"Father."
Van der Welcke was standing in front of him; Addie was sitting down. And Van der Welcke now took his son's head in his hands.
"Father," said Addie, "I wonder if you realize ... how devotedly I love you! It's something that I feel only for my parents and for my children, not for any woman."
"You're a funny chap," said Va der Welcke.
"But it is not your fault. It is your parents' fault."
"If you only knew," Addie repeated, "how devotedly I love you ... and Mamma!... And all of them here a bit too!... If I had my children here, then.... Perhaps, perhaps they will come back later ... very much later, with ... with Mathilde.... Look here, if that ever happens, we must all of us ... behave differently to her."
"Yes, my dear boy."
"Or try to."
"Yes, old fellow, I know what you mean. We'll all do it ... for your sake."
"You see, sheismy wife. I ... I am to blame for everything. If you will try...."
"Yes."
"Ifshe comes back.... Perhaps she won't come...."
"Do you want her to?"
"Yes, I do. I can't do without my children ... like this."
"But you'll see them now and again."
"Yes. So, if shedoescome back, you promise, Dad...."
"That I'll try."
"And, if they will all try, then ... then I shall be happy."
"Yes, they'll do it, for your sake. But...."
"If she comes back, I honestly believe ... that she will have learnt ... also to try ... to like us all a little."
"You mustn't be angry, Addie, that it was not like that at once. She is so different ... from all of us."
"Yes, it's my fault."
"No, my boy, don't go thinking that and worrying about it."
"No, Father."
"What you've got to do now is to try and be happy among us all ... to work ... to pick up your work again, you know."
"Yes, just so."
"And then, gradually, to let thingscome... as you say.... Would it upset you very much if she and Erzeele...."
"Yes. Because I should then feel my shortcomings towards her still more strongly.... And also because of my children."
"Perhaps things will come right, later, my boy."
"Perhaps."
"Take it all calmly now ... and don't worry. And just do your work here quietly."
"Yes, Father.... Oh, I feel that you are my father!"
"Perhaps for the first time!... A different part for your old ruffian of a father!"
"You're not an old ruffian, you're...."
Addie stood up and embraced his father.
"Don't squeeze the breath out of my body!" said Van der Welcke. "You're strong enough still. And you're looking well too. Your eyes look interested again, even though they're a bit too pensive. And they were always calm.... Did you have an interesting time abroad?"
"I saw a great deal of misery ... but also a great deal of good-will...."
"That's it: do what you can here, just simply, in your own surroundings. Oh, my dear chap, how glad I am that you're back!"
Gerdy looked in at the door:
"May wenevercome in?... Uncle Henri, you're being selfish about Addie!..."
"You may come in, dear."
Addie took her hands:
"Will you be strong, Gerdy?"
She sobbed and laughed through her tears:
"I have tried to be all the time, Addie," she whispered. "But for you...."
"You know, life isn'tallyour first suffering."
"No, so you've told me."
"And you must believe it.... It will help you.... You have such a long future before you."
"Yes. Oh, Addie, Addie, but for you...."
"What?"
"I should have died! I have suffered so, I have suffered so!"
"And you see so much suffering around you.... But life...."
"Isn't all your first suffering ... as you say."
"And you must believe it."
"Yes, I'll try."
Constance entered:
"Am I to see nothing of my boy this evening?" she asked, banteringly.
He took her in a clinging embrace:
"You've got him home for good now."
She gave a sob:
"My poor child ... then I haven't lost you?"
"Lost me? Why?"
"A son...."
"You've always been afraid ... of losing me. But you never have lost me."
"No, never.... Tell me, dear, am I to blame? I am to blame, am I not?"
"How?"
"About Mathilde."
"No, you're not to blame.... But,ifshe comes back, later, with the children, Mamma, let us try...."
"Yes, dear, yes."
"We will, won't we? We must try ... to bring ourselves into harmony with her as far as possible...."
"Yes, yes, I will try."
"And all of us."
"Yes, all of us."
"That's so, Gerdy, isn't it? We must all...."
"What did you say, Addie?"
"I was saying, Gerdy,ifMathilde comes back, later on...."
"Yes...."
"Would you be willing to try ... with all of us, with Papa and Mamma, with every one of us ... to get into harmony with her as far as possible, so that she...."
"Yes, oh, Addie, yes! I'll try!"
"You will?"
"Oh, yes!... If she comes back, I'll try, Addie, I'll try."
"My dear, listen to it blowing."
"That'sourwind, Mamma."
"Yes, always."
Marietje and Adèletje had now gone into the dining-room; Adeline and Emilie came after them.
"Why is it so dark in there?" asked Marietje.
"Grandmamma's taking a nap."
"We must take her to bed," said Constance.
Adèletje turned up the gas.
"Auntie!" cried Marietje, in alarm.
"What is it, dear?"
"Oh, Auntie, Auntie ... come here!"
Constance came in, with Addie and Gerdy.
"Is Grandmamma ... is Grandmamma...?" stammered Marietje, aghast.
They all looked at the old woman. She was sitting as usual, sitting quietly in her big chair, with her veined and wrinkled hands folded in her black lap. Her head hung back, framed white in her white hair. All knowledge was hers now; and her old mouth smiled because of it, encouragingly....
CONTENTS
TRANSLATOR'S NOTECHAPTER ICHAPTER IICHAPTER IIICHAPTER IVCHAPTER VCHAPTER VICHAPTER VIICHAPTER VIIICHAPTER IXCHAPTER XCHAPTER XICHAPTER XIICHAPTER XIIICHAPTER XIVCHAPTER XVCHAPTER XVICHAPTER XVIICHAPTER XVIIICHAPTER XXCHAPTER XXICHAPTER XXIICHAPTER XXIIICHAPTER XXIVCHAPTER XXVCHAPTER XXVICHAPTER XXVIICHAPTER XXVIIICHAPTER XXIXCHAPTER XXXCHAPTER XXXI