A GRUESOME DISCOVERY
Our good clerical and antiquarian friend at Horncastle had told us overnight that some years ago, whilst making alterations in the flooring of Scrivelsby church, a body was found in a coffin with a lump of clay in the place where the head should be. This was the remains of the Dymoke who fought against the king at the battle of Stamford, or as it was popularly called, “Loose-Coat Field.” This Dymoke was taken prisoner there, and afterwards beheaded, and his traitor-head was exposed on the tower gateway of London Bridge. According to Drayton (Polyolbion, xxii.) the men of the defeated army in this encounter
Cut off their country’s coats to haste their speed awayWhich “Loose-Coat Field” is called e’en to this day.
Cut off their country’s coats to haste their speed awayWhich “Loose-Coat Field” is called e’en to this day.
Cut off their country’s coats to haste their speed awayWhich “Loose-Coat Field” is called e’en to this day.
Leaving storied and picturesque Scrivelsby with regret, we retraced our road to Horncastle, and got on the old Lincoln turnpike highway there; a splendid wide coaching road running for some miles along the top of an elevated stretch of ground, from which we obtained glorious prospects over a country of rolling hills (the Wolds) to our right, and over a fine expanse of well-wooded land to our left, a sea of waving greenery stretching away till lost in misty blue. I trust that our coach-travelling ancestors—to whom was granted the privilege of seeing their own country when they made a journey—enjoyed the scenery on the way as much as we did that morning; if so their enjoyment must have been great. But the love of scenery is of recent birth. I sadly fear that our ancestors, from all accounts, thought far more of the comforts of their inns than of the beauties of the landscape they passed through; as for mountains they simply looked upon them as ugly obstructions to easy and speedy travel, and heartily hated them accordingly!
It was one of those fine, fresh, breezy days that make it a delight simply to be out of doors; the atmosphere was life-giving. The sky above was compounded of about equal parts of deep, pure blue and of great white rounded clouds, that as they sailed along caused a ceaseless play of sunshine andshadow over all the spreading landscape. “Well,” exclaimed my wife, “and this is Lincolnshire; I don’t wish for a pleasanter country to travel in!” “Nor I,” was my response.
A DECAYED MARKET-TOWN
The first place we came to was Wragby, some nine miles from Horncastle—nine miles of beauty, if uneventful ones. It was a restful, refreshing stage, without anything special to do or to inspect on the way. We had seen so much of late that we rejoiced for a change in a day-dreamy progress with nothing to disturb our quiet enjoyment of the greenful gladness of the smiling country-side. Wragby is a little decayed market-town, clean and wind-swept; a slumberous spot that seems simply to exist because it has existed. The only moving thing in it when we arrived, as far as we could see, were the great sails of one tall windmill that stood just where the houses ceased and the fields began, and even these sails revolved in a lazy, leisurely fashion, as though hurry were a thing unknown in the place. We did not catch a glimpse of the miller, perhaps because he was asleep whilst the wind worked for him! We did not see a soul in the streets or deserted market-square, but possibly it was the local dinner-hour. So still all things seemed; the clatter and rumbling of our dogcart sounded so loudly in the quiet street, that we felt as though we ought almost to apologise to the inhabitants for disturbing their ancient tranquillity. One can hardly realise what perfect quietude means till one has experienced it in some somnolent rural town at dinner-hour. Such places possess a stillness greater than that of thecountry where the birds sing, the leaves of the trees rustle in the wind, and the stream gurgles on its way—all in the minor key truly, still noticeable—to which may be added the sounds that proceed, and carry far, from the many farmsteads, the lowing of cattle, the bleating of sheep, the bark of dog, the call of shepherd, the rattle of the mowing or reaping machine. No, for perfect quietness (or deadly dulness, if you will) commend me to some old, dreamy, decayed market-town at mid-day!
Wragby is not a picturesque place, not by any stretch of the imagination; nor, in the usual acceptance of the term, is it in any possible way interesting. Yet it interested us, in a mild manner, on account of its homely naturalness, its mellow look, and the indescribable old-world air that brooded over all. It seemed to belong to another day, as though in driving into it we had driven into a past century as well. There was a sense of remoteness about the spot, both of time and space, that appealed strongly to our feelings. A mere matter of sentiment all this, a purely poetic illusion that we gladly gave way to for the time; it is a good thing to be able to romance, now and then, in this most unromantic age!
We drove under the archway of the drowsy and weather-beaten old inn that faced us here, a plain structure enough, but it appealed to us as a relic of the old coaching days. The stable-yard was deserted, erstwhile so busy; for Wragby was an important posting place in the pre-railway age, being the half-way house between Lincoln and Louth, aswell as between Lincoln and Horncastle; for at this spot those two highways meet.
Having aroused some one and stabled our horses, we entered the ancient hostelry, and were shown into a front sitting-room, where, doubtless, in the days gone by, our forefathers feasted and made merry. The saddest feature of this later age is the decay of joyousness in life; we travel luxuriously certainly, but seriously, as we seem to do all else. Our sitting-room had a look as though it had seen better times, the carpet, curtains, and paper were worn and sun-faded, but the room was clean and sweet, and the sunshine streaming in made it more cheerful, to me at any rate, than certain sumptuously furnished drawing-rooms I know well, where the inspiriting sunshine is carefully excluded by blinds, lest it should fade the too expensive upholstering. Yet there is nothing so decorative or so truly beautiful in a room; it is only the poor, if expensive, modern material that fades shabbily. Good old stuff, a Turkey or Persian carpet, old Oriental hangings, tone and improve rather by light, their colours are simply softened down.
HUNGRY TRAVELLERS
“What can we have to eat?” we inquired. “Have you any cold meat?” No, but they could perhaps get us a chop, or we could have some ham and eggs, or bread and cheese. We were hungry, very hungry in fact, for driving across country on a breezy, bracing day is a wonderful appetiser; so, neglecting the counter attractions of bacon and eggs—the standard dish of a homely country inn when other things fail—we elected to have the certainbread and cheese rather than wait for the doubtful chop; besides, sometimes chops are tough, and oftentimes they are fried, and not grilled as they should be. Presently a coarse but spotless cloth was laid upon the table, napkins were provided, and some wild flowers in an ugly vase made a welcome decoration—the flowers, not the vase! Even the vase had its lowly use, it enhanced the delicate beauty of the flowers by contrast. After all we had no cause to regret our frugal fare, for we enjoyed some delicious home-baked bread with a sweet flavour and a deliciously crisp crust, quite a different article from the insipid production of the London baker, and far more to be desired, an excellent cheese, not made abroad, and some home-brewed ale, nut-brown and foaming, which we quaffed with much satisfaction out of a two-handled tankard. It was truly a simple repast, but then everything of its kind was as good as it could be, and our bill came to only two shillings—one shilling each!
Leaving Wragby we entered upon another very pleasant but uneventful stretch of country; it was a reposeful afternoon, the wind had dropped, and all nature was in a tranquil mood; in sympathy with her so were we. In fact during the whole of the afternoon’s drive we neither sketched nor photographed, nor descended once from the dogcart to see this or that; we were content to behold the country from our comfortable seat in a lazy sort of way; and there is a virtue in laziness sometimes. The quiet, pastoral landscape had a drowsy aspect that was most peace-bestowing. We drove leisurely on,
A LAZY LAND
satisfied simply to admire the extended and varied picture gallery that nature presented to us free.
Except the striking prospect of Lincoln that we had towards the end of our dreamy stage, I can only now recall of it a confused memory of green and golden fields; of shady woods, beautiful with the many tints of autumn; of hedgerowed lanes, that in a less lazy mood we should certainly have explored; of picturesque old cottages and rambling time-toned farmsteads, the very picture of contentment; of silvery gliding streams, and a vague blue distance bounding all.
Passing through the long-streeted village of Langworth, a name derived, I take it, from the Anglo-Saxon “lang” long, and “worth” a street or place, so that it is suitably called,—the fine view of Lincoln Minster and city aforementioned was suddenly presented to us, a view not readily to be forgotten! There before us stood the ancient minster with its three stately towers crowning the steep hill that rises so finely and abruptly out of the clustering city below; the triple-towered fane dominating the whole in a truly medieval fashion. No feudal castle ever looked more masterful, or more lordly asserted its supremacy over the dwellings of the people. What a change from the early days when the Church, poor and persecuted like its Master, conquered the world by humility! That day we beheld the Church triumphant. There is no suggestion of poverty or humility about this majestic minster, but there is a plentiful suggestion of dignity and Christian (?) pride. The position of Lincoln Cathedral in stateliness isunrivalled in England, with the possible exception of that of Durham which in a like manner stands imperial upon its rocky height above the smoky city; but Durham is dark and sombre, whilst Lincoln is bright and clean and beautiful. It may perhaps, though doubtfully, be conceded that Durham has the more romantic situation, and Lincoln the more picturesque—if one can distinguish so.
Lincoln may roughly be divided into two distinct portions, the more ancient and picturesque part being situated on the hill, and clustering immediately around the cathedral; the other and more modern, very modern mostly, with its railways and tram-lined streets, being situated on the level-lying land below; the descent from the former to the latter is by one of the steepest streets—it is called “the Steep” locally, if I remember aright—I verily believe in all England; indeed, it seemed to us, it could not well be much steeper without being perpendicular! In the quaint and ancient part, with its many reminders of the long ago in the shape of time-worn medieval buildings—from ruined castle, fortified gateway, gray and gabled home—we found a comfortable and quiet inn, such as befits a cathedral city; an inn standing almost under the shadow of the stately pile, that rose upwards close by, a solemn shapely mass of pearly-gray against the sunlit sky.
Having secured quarters for the night, the first thing we did was, naturally, to start forth and see the cathedral. Pray do not be alarmed, kind reader, I have neither the intention nor the desire to weary
GUIDES AND GUIDE-BOOKS
you with a long detailed description of the sacred edifice. For this I will refer you to the guide-books, of which there are many; of their quality or utility I cannot speak, for we did not consult one ourselves, preferring to see the cathedral in our own way, and to form our own opinions, and to admire what most impressed us, not what the handbook compilers assert is the most to be admired. Of course by doing this it is quite possible that we may have missed some things of minor note, but nothing, I think, of real importance. Personally I have always found the constant consulting of a guide-book not only to be disturbing but preventive of my gaining an individual impression of a place, for one is but too apt to be influenced to a greater or lesser extent by the opinion of others, often expressed in a most irritatingly dogmatic manner. Some people are so annoyingly certain about the most uncertain things in this world! Moreover, once upon a time, as the fabled stories of childhood begin, I placed implicit faith in guide-books, but as I grew older and knew more, my faith in them, sad to relate, grew feebler, and this because I found that in certain things I knew well about, they were not by any means correct, indeed, often very inexact. After which experience I now feel less inclined than perhaps I should be to trust them in matters of which I am ignorant or not well informed. I may also add that, according to my experience, the personal guide is even less reliable than the printed one; only you are enabled to cross-question the former, and so indirectly estimate the value of the information imparted—for a tip; the latter you cannot.
Once I got into rare trouble over a local guide-book. Armed with the precious production I had gone over a very ancient and interesting old church, only to find the little work sadly at fault in many particulars. Whereupon I shut it up and placed it carefully out of harm’s way in my pocket, at which point the clerk appeared upon the scene. He was an aged man and talkative, to a certain extent intelligent, and he managed to interest me, so I pulled out the guide-book and began confidentially to expatiate to him upon its numerous failings; luckless me, I raised a very hornets’ nest! It turned out that the clerk was the author of the work in question, and very proud he was of his production too. He had lived in the place all his life, “man and boy,” he indignantly informed me, and thought he ought to know more about the church than an utter stranger. Why, the book had been the work of his life, and was it likely that I, who confessed to having only come there the day before, should know better about “his” church than he did? Which was no answer to my comments, nor was the request, almost a demand, to let him have the guide-book at the price I had given for it. He would not condescend to discuss the points in dispute, though he kindly confessed I might know a little about “harchitecture andhantiquities, but you know,” he loftily exclaimed, with the self-satisfied air of a man having special knowledge, “you know the old saying ‘a little learning is a dangerous thing,’”and with this parting shaft he walked away. Poor old man, and if he only knew how sorry we felt that we had so innocently hurt his
AN AMUSING INCIDENT
feelings! This was a lesson to us never again to run down a work of any kind before strangers, for one of them may be its author! An amusing incident of a somewhat similar nature came under my notice at a dinner-party. The host was a picture-lover and purchaser, not perhaps a very discriminating one, but this is a matter aside; however, he bought pictures and entertained artists, and his dining-room was hung round with numerous paintings, some good, some indifferent. I believe the personality of the artist often unconsciously influenced the host in his purchases; if he liked the man he was biassed in favour of his work. At one of his pleasant little parties, a lady innocently remarked,sotto voce, to the gentleman who had taken her down to dinner, possibly more to make conversation than anything else, “Do you see that picture over there? I cannot imagine how Mr. Dash could have bought it; don’t you think it a regular daub? I ask you as I understand you are an artist.” It was an unfortunate speech, as the reply showed, for the gentleman exclaimed, with an amused smile, be it confessed, “Madam, it’s bound to be a daub, for I painted it!”
“A precious piece of architecture”—Guests at an inn—A pleasant city—Unexpected kindness—A medieval lavatory—An honest lawyer!—The cost of obliging a stranger—Branston—A lost cyclist—In search of a husband!—Dunston Pillar—An architectural puzzle—A Lincolnshire spa—Exploring—An ancient chrismatory.
“A precious piece of architecture”—Guests at an inn—A pleasant city—Unexpected kindness—A medieval lavatory—An honest lawyer!—The cost of obliging a stranger—Branston—A lost cyclist—In search of a husband!—Dunston Pillar—An architectural puzzle—A Lincolnshire spa—Exploring—An ancient chrismatory.
LincolnCathedral is surely, both within and without, one of the most interesting and beautiful in England; its superb central tower is the finest specimen of medieval building of its kind I have so far seen. Were I inclined to be dogmatic, regardless of the possibilities of what I have not beheld, I should proclaim it to be the most beautiful in the world, perfect, as it appears to me to be, in proportion and decoration, besides being so dignified. It is in just this rare, but delightful, quality of dignity that the modern architect somehow so lamentably fails; he may be grand by virtue of mass, he may be picturesque by accident, but dignity he seldom achieves! The chapter house here, with its bold flying buttresses outside and grand groined roof within, is a notable bit of eye-pleasing architecture—but I declared I had no intention of wearying my readers with a detailed description of this cathedral, and already I find myself beginning to do so; and
RUSKIN ON LINCOLN
truly Lincoln Cathedral, above all others, should be seen, not described. Perhaps it may not be out of place here to quote some of Ruskin’s remarks on Lincoln and its cathedral, contained in a letter written by the famous art critic to a local celebrity at the time of the opening of the Lincoln School of Art. I quote this the more gladly as, owing to the nature of the communication, it may not be generally known, and all that Ruskin has to say should be worth preserving. Thus then he wrote: “I have always held, and am prepared against all comers to maintain, that the cathedral of Lincoln is out and out the most precious piece of architecture in the British Islands, and, roughly speaking, worth any two other cathedrals we have got. Secondly, that the town of Lincoln is a lovely old English town, and I hope the mayor and common-councilmen won’t let any of it (not so much as a house corner) be pulled down to build an institution, or a market, or a penitentiary, or a gunpowder and dynamite mill, or a college, or a gaol, or a barracks, or any other modern luxury.” This is true Ruskinian; and fortified by such an expression of such an authority, I feel after all inclined for once to be dogmatic and declare that Lincoln, taking it as a whole, is the loveliest cathedral in the land. Shielded behind Ruskin’s great authority I venture this bold opinion; other cathedrals may be admired, Lincoln can not only be admired, it may also be loved. It is not always one finds grandeur thus combined with lovableness!
Within the cathedral we noticed several tweed-clad tourists amongst the crowd “doing” the building; these were the first regulation tourists we had come upon during our drive, which circumstance brought to our mind the fact, possibly not realised by the many, that our cathedrals have become more like vast museums than places of worship devoted to God. I have attended a cathedral service on a week-day, and have made one of a congregation of five—all told; which seems, to me, a great waste of clerical and choirical energy. I afterwards asked the verger if they did not generally have more people at that particular service, and he replied meaningly, “When the weather is wet we sometimes have fewer.” And I could not help wondering whether it might not be possible, on certain occasions, when the elements were especially unpropitious, that the vergers had the elaborate service and superb singing all to themselves! Which is magnificent! When the service in question we attended was over, the tourists, who had been waiting outside, trooped in hurriedly and in numbers more than I could conveniently or perhaps possibly count. I venture to say that in our cathedrals, during the year, the people who come merely for sight-seeing vastly outnumber those who come purely for worship.
Over the ancient fane, and its immediate surroundings, there seems to brood the hush of centuries, a hush heightened rather than broken, when we were there, by the cooing of innumerable pigeons that love to linger about the hoary pile, and give a pleasant touch of life to the steadfast masonry. Leaving the cathedral and the city on the hill
A SHARP CONTRAST
(“Above Hill” it is locally called to distinguish it from the city “Below Hill”), we descended to the more modern part. This time we appeared not to tread back the long centuries, but to walk suddenly out of the picturesque past into the very prosaic present, as represented by Lincoln’s busy High Street. There we found tram-cars running and jingling along; eager crowds on the pavement; plate-glass-fronted shops, quite “up to date”; and a large railway station asserted its nineteenth-century ugliness,—moreover, right across this thronged thoroughfare was a level railway crossing of the London main line, and when the gates of this were shut, as they were from time to time, crowds of pedestrians and a mass of vehicles collected on either side. I have never seen before a level crossing of an important main line situated in the centre of a busy city High Street. I was under the impression that such things were only allowed in America. I was mistaken. An American gentleman, to whom I spoke of the nuisance of a certain level “railroad” crossing in Chicago, maintained that such a thing could be found in an English city. I stoutly maintained the contrary; he would not be convinced, neither would I. Lincoln proves me wrong. I apologise, in case by any remote chance these lines may catch the eye of that Chicago citizen, whose name I have forgotten.
Of most places there is generally one best view, a view that is distinctly superior to all others; but of Lincoln this cannot be said. The ancient city, with its towered cathedral standing sovereign on itshill, looks well from almost everywhere; each view has its special character and charm, and no one can be said to be better than another. As we returned to our inn and looked up the High Street, the prospect presented to us of the cathedral raised high over the red-roofed houses, gabled walls, and gray bits of medieval masonry peeping out here and there, with just a touch of mystery superadded by the blue film of smoke that floated veil-like over the lower city, was most poetic; gold and gray showed the sentinel towers as they stood in sunshine or shadow, softly outlined against the darkening sky. Another most effective view of Lincoln is from “the pool,” where the river widens out; here the foreground is changed from houses to reflective water with sleepy shipping thereon, shipping of the homely kind that navigates inland waters. But from almost every point “below hill,” where the cathedral can be seen as a whole—there is a picture such as the true artist loves; not sensational at all, but simply beautiful and benevolent, which is more to my mind. Lincoln as a picture charms, it does not astonish; it is supremely effective without being in the least theatrical or unreal; unlike the architectural scenery of Italy—if I may be allowed the term—it does not suggest the painting of a drop-scene, nor the background of an opera!
Lincoln “above hill” is not only one of the most pleasant cities in England, it is also one of the most picturesque; it is beautiful close at hand, it is beautiful beheld at a distance.
In the evening we had evidence of having comeback to modern civilisation as represented by atable d’hôte, a luxury that we had missed, without regret, at the homely old-fashioned hostelries wherein we had been so comfortably entertained hitherto on the way. It was a simpletable d’hôte, however, with more of the name than the reality about it, nevertheless it was “served at separate tables” in true British insular fashion. Though the tables were separate we had one allotted to us with a stranger, and, according to the “custom of the country,” commenced our meal in mutual silence, neither speaking a word to the other, both being equally to blame in this respect. At an American hotel, under similar circumstances, such unsociability would be considered unmannered—and it would be impossible.
INNVERSUSHOTEL
Accustomed so long to the friendliness of the old-fashioned inn, we could not stand the freezing formality of the hotel—it depressed us. So we endeavoured, with the usual commonplaces about the weather and so forth, to break the oppressive silence, only to be answered in gruff monosyllables. This was not promising; even though we might be addressing a man of importance in fact, or solely in his own estimation, surely it would do him no harm to make a show of civility to a stranger that fate had brought him in close contact with at an inn. Truly, he might be a lord or a commercial traveller, we could not tell, nor did it matter to us; we merely wished to be sociable. By tact at last we prevailed. There is no armour against tact and a pleasant manner that costs nothing, and over an after-dinnercigar—one of the stranger’s cigars, by the way, which he pressed upon us as being “so much better than what you buy at hotels”—we actually became such friends that he gave us his card, and, learning that we were on a driving tour, actually added a most pressing invitation for us to come and stay with him at his place in the country, “horses and all.” I mention this incident exactly as it occurred. No moral follows, though I could get one in nicely; but I refrain.
Not only is the view of Lincoln’s cathedral-crowned city very fine from all around, a proper distance being granted, but the prospects from many points within the elevated portion of the city are also exceedingly lovely, and equally rewarding in their way, commanding, as they do, vast stretches of greenful landscape, varied by spreading woods, and enlivened by the silvery gleam of winding river, not to forget the picturesque trail of white steam from the speeding trains that give a wonderful feeling of life and movement to the view,—a view bounded to the west and south by the faint blue, long, undulating lines of the distant Wolds.
Open to all “the four winds,” or more, of heaven, Lincoln “above hill” can never be “stuffy,” as many medieval cities are. When we were there the weather was warm and oppressively close in the city “below hill,” and a gentleman driving in from the country declared that it was “the hottest day of the year,” still in the streets around the cathedral we found a refreshing, if balmy, breeze. Some ancient towns have the pleasing quality of picturesqueness,but the air in them during the summer-time seems to stagnate. I prefer my picturesqueness, as at Lincoln, air-flushed! Lincoln, too, is clean and sweet. Some ancient cities, though undoubtedly romantic, unhappily possess neither of these virtues. Dirt and evil smells, in my eyes, take a great deal away from the glamour of the beautiful. I can never get enthusiastic over dirt. Even age does not hallow dirt to me.
A QUAINT OLD HOME
As we resumed our journey, a short distance from our hotel we noticed a quaint old stone-built house with a pleasant garden in front, a garden divided from the highroad by an iron gateway. The old house looked such a picture that we pulled up to admire it through the open iron-work, which, whilst making a most protective fence, also permitted the passer-by to behold the beauties it enclosed. Most Englishmen prefer the greater privacy afforded by a high wall or a tall oak-board fence. I am selfish enough to do so too, though, from the traveller’s point of view, it is very refreshing to eye and mind to be able to get such beauty-peeps beyond the dusty roads.
Observing a lady here plucking flowers in the pleasant garden, we ventured boldly to open the gates, and, with our best bow, begged permission to take a photograph of the picturesque old building. Our request was readily granted, and with a smile. In fact, during the whole of our tour it seemed to us that we had only to ask a favour to have it granted with a smile—all of which was very pleasant. On the road it verily seemed as though life were all sunshine, and everybody an impersonation of goodnature. I know people have gone a-driving across country and found things otherwise; but the world is as we see and make it! They may have frowned on it, and that is a fatal thing to do.
Having taken our photograph, and having expressed our thanks in our best manner to the lady for her kindness, we were about to rejoin the dog-cart, when the lady said, “You seem interested in old places. If you care to step inside I think I can show you something you might like to see.” We most gladly accepted the kind and wholly unexpected invitation; it was what, just then, we desired above everything, but never ventured to hope for. Again it was forcibly brought to our mind what a profitable possession is a gracious bearing to the traveller.
Entering the house, let into the wall on one side of the hall, we had pointed out to us a carved stone lavatory of medieval date. At first glance this looked very much like some old altar, but running the whole length of the top we observed a sort of trench; along this in times past, we were told, water used to flow continuously. We could not help fancying that probably this once belonged to a monastery (a similar kind of lavatory may still be seen in the cloisters of Gloucester Cathedral). On the opposite side of the hall we caught sight of a genuine old grandfather’s clock with the following motto inscribed thereon, which was fresh to us, and so I quote it:—
Good TimesBad TimesAll TimesPass On.
Good TimesBad TimesAll TimesPass On.
Good TimesBad TimesAll TimesPass On.
EPITAPHS ON LAWYERS
Before leaving Lincoln I would call attention to a rather quaint epitaph to be found in the churchyard of St. Mary’s-le-Wyford, which runs as follows:—
Here lies one, believe it if you can,Who though an attorney, was an honest man.
Here lies one, believe it if you can,Who though an attorney, was an honest man.
Here lies one, believe it if you can,Who though an attorney, was an honest man.
This reminds me of a frequently quoted epitaph of a similar nature that a friend of mine assured me he copied many years ago in a Norfolk churchyard when on a walking tour. Unfortunately he was not sure of the name of the churchyard, being a very careless man as to details; but I have his word that he did not get it out of a book, so I venture to give it here:—
Here lies an honest lawyer,And that’s STRANGE.——He never lied before.
Here lies an honest lawyer,And that’s STRANGE.——He never lied before.
Here lies an honest lawyer,And that’s STRANGE.——He never lied before.
The praise in these epitaphs is reversed in another, that sounds rather like an ill-natured version of the preceding; and as I copied it out of a local magazine I came across on the road, let us hope in charity it is not true:—
Here lies lawyer Dash;First he lied on one side,Then he lied on the other,Now he lies on his back.
Here lies lawyer Dash;First he lied on one side,Then he lied on the other,Now he lies on his back.
Here lies lawyer Dash;First he lied on one side,Then he lied on the other,Now he lies on his back.
Just out of Lincoln, when we had escaped the streets and had entered upon a country road, we found a stiff hill before us. From the top of this, looking back, was another fine and comprehensive view of the cathedral and city—a view that almost deserved the much-abused term of romantic. Ever mindful of the welfare of our horses, who gave us somuch pleasure, we dismounted to ease their load. Trudging up the hill we overtook a good-natured-looking man laden with parcels. After exchanging civilities upon the never-failing topic of the weather with him, we incidentally remarked that it was rather a stiff pull up for a hot day. “That it is,” responded the stranger, as he stopped to take breath. “We call it Steep Hill. The worst of Lincolnshire is the hills.” We noticed that he spoke quite in earnest, and there was the hill before us much in evidence to give point to his complaint. His remark struck us as a curious comment to those who declare that all Lincolnshire is “as flat as a pancake.”
Then he asked us where we were going, and we told him. “Ah!” said he, “you’ll pass through Branston, one of the prettiest villages in England, and I say this without prejudice, being a Lincolnshire man.” Now, as Branston is a Lincolnshire village, we did not exactly see the sequence, but said nothing.
Presently, when we had reached the top of the hill and were about to remount the dog-cart, the stranger exclaimed, “If you see my wife on the way, she’s coming to meet me. Would you mind telling her I’m hurrying on as fast as I can with the good things for dinner?” We replied that we should be most happy to oblige him, but as we had not the pleasure of knowing his wife, it would be rather difficult for us to do as he wished. “Oh!” he exclaimed, “there will be no difficulty in the matter. You can’t mistake her, she’s over fifteen stone!” So, as we proceeded, we kept an outlook for any one answering that description, and in a mile
AN INNOCENT BLUNDER
or so surely enough we met a very stout party walking along. We at once pulled up and gave her the message. Not readily shall I forget the angry flush that came over that good woman’s face. “I daresay,” shouted she back, “you think it a grand thing to drive about and insult unprotected ladies. A pretty way of amusing yourselves, and I suppose you think yourself a gentleman—a gentleman, indeed? Well, you’re not one, so there! I haven’t got a husband, thank God!...” and so forth in superabundance. We hurriedly drove on to escape the torrent of abuse. Manifestly we had made a mistake, and had addressed the wrong party! We did not think it worth while to attempt an explanation, even could we have got a word in, as she probably would not have believed us, and we might have made matters worse. For the moment we wished we had not been so obliging to a stranger. Shortly after this incident we met another stout party on the way; she might have been fifteen stone, more or less, but with our recent experience we did not venture to address her. We might have made another mistake—with the consequences!
Branston we found to be all that it had been represented to us. A very pretty village indeed it was, composed chiefly of stone-built cottages, pleasantly weather-tinted, many having picturesque porches, and nearly all possessing little flower gardens in front, gay with colour and sweet of odour. The church, too, was aged and gray, and we noticed in the walls some “long-and-short” work showing rude but lasting Saxon masonry andproving that a church was there before the Conquest. A bit of history told in stone. The hoary fane suggested an interesting interior, but we found the doors to be carefully locked, and we felt in no humour to go a-clerk-hunting; the day was too temptingly fine to waste any of it in that tiresome sport. Just beyond the village we observed a walled-in park, the gateway piers of which were surmounted by two very grotesque figures.
Branston would have done credit to Devonshire, that county of picturesque villages; it was of the kind that ladies love to term “sweetly pretty.” Were Branston only in Devonshire, near some tourist centres that there abound, I venture to say it would be much painted, photographed, and written about in a laudatory manner, and possibly also have its praises sung of by poets; but being only in Lincolnshire, out of the traveller’s beat, its charms are reserved for the favoured few whom chance may bring that way.
Then driving on through a lovely, lonely country, with fine views to our left, over a well-wooded land that faded away into a mystery of low blue hills, we came in time to four cross-roads, where we found a lady all alone standing beside her tricycle looking hot, tired, and dusty. We saw no guide-post here, just where one would have been most acceptably useful, for we felt doubtful as to our way, our map not being so clear as we could wish—a provoking feature about maps in general, and the one we had in particular; so, doffing our cap most politely, we asked the lady if she would kindly direct us. “Nowhow can I possibly direct you,” replied she, “when I don’t know the way myself?” We apologised for troubling her, explaining that we had no idea that she was in the same predicament as ourselves, and to propitiate her we offered her the loan of our useless map! We thought the act looked polite, and that perhaps she could understand it better than we could. The offer was a strategic blunder. We realised this as soon as it was made. “If you’ve got a map,” exclaimed she, “why don’t you consult it?” Under the circumstances our retort was not very clear. So we wisely said nothing, but quietly consulted between ourselves which road we should take at a venture. “I think straight ahead looks the most travelled and direct,” I said. “The one to the left looks much the prettiest,” remarked my wife; “let us take it, we are in no hurry to get anywhere, and we shall eventually arrive somewhere—we always do. Put the stupid map away, and let us drive along the pretty road and chance where it leads.” So the picturesque prevailed. Perhaps I may here incidentally state that when we set out from Lincoln, Woodhall Spa was our proposed destination for the night.
A LOST HUSBAND!
As we were leaving the spot the cyclist manifestly relented towards us, and exclaimed, perhaps as a sort of explanation of her brusqueness, and perhaps in hope that we might be of service to her after all, “I’m out on a tour with my husband and have lost him! He rode ahead of me to find the way, and that was a good hour ago, and I’ve been waiting here for him ever since. I’m tired and hungry—and he’s got the lunch with him! If youmeet a man on a tricycle with a gray tweed suit on, that’s my husband; would you mind telling him I’m here, and ask him to hurry up?” We felt a good deal amused at this request; first we had been asked only that morning by a husband to give a message to his wife, who was unknown to us, and got into rare trouble over the matter; now we were asked by a wife to give a message to her husband, who was equally unknown to us,—should we get into further trouble if we did, we wondered? However, strangely enough, often on our tours have we performed the service of messenger; sometimes we have taken letters and delivered them on the way; once we conveyed the official correspondence from a lonely lighthouse; and once we were sent after a clergyman to take the duties of another clergyman at service. So we have been of use on the road!
Presently our road dipped down and led us to a picturesque village in a hollow, whose name I now forget, but whose pleasantness lingers in my memory. Driving on we noticed on the summit of the spreading uplands to our right, a tall pillar standing alone, a very prominent object in the view, though a long way off. We inquired of a man passing by what it was. “That? oh, that’s Dunston Pillar,” he replied; “you can see it for miles around in almost every direction. It used to be a lighthouse.” “What, a lighthouse so far inland?” we exclaimed. “Yes, that’s just what it was. It used to have a huge lantern on the top in the old days, which was always kept lighted at night to guide belated travellers over Lincoln Heath, a rare wild spot
AN INLAND LIGHTHOUSE
in times gone by, I’ve heard say not much better than a trackless waste. So you see a lighthouse could be useful inland as well as by the sea.” We saw! On referring again to my copy ofPatersons RoadsI find the following: “Dunston Pillar is a plain quadrangular stone shaft, of a pyramidal shape, that rises to the height of about 100 feet. It was erected when the roads were intricate, and the heath was an extensive waste, and was then of great utility; but as the lands have since been enclosed, and other improvements made, it can now only be considered as a monument of the public spirit of the individual by whom it was constructed.”
Then after a few more miles we reached Metheringham, an out-of-the-world, forsaken-looking little town; so out-of-the-world that I do not find it even mentioned in myPaterson, and why, or how, it existed at all was a puzzle to us. In times past it was shut away from the world more than now by the wild extensive Lincolnshire Heath on one side, and a narrow, though long, stretch of roadless fenland on the other, so was not very get-at-able.
In the centre of the sleepy old town, midway in the street, stand the remains of its ancient market-cross: these consist of an upright shaft rising from some worn and weathered steps; the place of the cross on the top is now occupied by an ugly petroleum lamp. Even a stern Puritan might have been satisfied with this arrangement, there is nothing in the least superstitious about it, it is convenient but not beautiful. I only wonder that, as the ruined cross stands so handily at the junction of three roads,it has not been further utilised as a finger-post as well as a lamp-post! I can only put down the omission to do this to an oversight,—a wasted opportunity to add to the disfigurement of the country-side!
We baited the horses at a little inn here, and, whilst they were resting, took a stroll round the place to see if we could find anything of interest, but failed. So we took a glance inside the church, and there we discovered an astonishing specimen of architectural incongruity. The Gothic arches, we observed, were supported by purely classical pillars. How this came about we could not say positively, but we put it down to our old enemy the restorer. We should imagine that it was done at the time that the classical revival was rampant in England, when Wren was in his glory, and only want of money saved many a Gothic building from being altered to taste. Fashions in architecture come and go as do fashions in dress.
Leaving Metheringham, a good-going road that took us through a very pleasant country brought us quickly to the hard-featured village of Martin, composed of brick-built cottages that came close up to the roadway, without as much as a bit of garden in front to soften their uncomeliness, as though land in this wild remote district were as precious as in London, so that every possible inch of it needs must be built on! In the street, as we passed down, we caught a sight of a brick “steeple-house”—I use the term meaningly and of set purpose—quite in keeping with its unprepossessing surroundings.
STIXWOLD FERRY.
STIXWOLD FERRY.
STIXWOLD FERRY.
I may be wrong, but I do not think a place of worship could well be made uglier—not even if corrugated iron were employed in the endeavour, and much unsightliness can be wrought that way!
CAUGHT IN A STORM
At Martin we descended to a narrow stretch of fen, here almost treeless and hedgeless, and wholly wanting the wild, weird beauty of the wider Fenland with its magic of colour, and mystery of distance. Across this monotonous flat, our road led us “as straight as an arrow” for three or four miles, at a rough guess. Half-way over, where there was no possible shelter, it suddenly began to rain, then it poured in torrents and the wind began to blow—well, I am of opinion that you can get as wet on an exposed fenland as anywhere! After all we were not sorry that the road was so straight, we could the sooner get over it.
Leaving the dreary fens without regret, we reached the embanked and slothful river Witham at a spot marked “Ferry” on our map, but where we fortunately found an iron swing-bridge. It was an ugly affair, whereas a ferry would most possibly have been picturesque, like that of Stixwold a little higher up the same river, which I sketched next day, and is herewith engraved, but it was raining hard, and to ferry across, though doubtless a more romantic proceeding, would have meant more discomfiture, so we were glad of the bridge, nor did we begrudge the sixpence toll demanded for the use thereof. Another mile or so of good road brought us to Woodhall Spa, where we arrived dripping and jolly, to find a warm welcome at our hotel. I know not how it is,but when one arrives by road one seems always ensured of a hearty welcome.
Woodhall Spa is about as unlike the usual run of fashionable watering-places as one can well imagine. It is a charming health resort, but it happily boasts of nothing to attract the purely pleasure-seeking crowd, and on account of the absence of these attractions it appealed to us. The country around also is equally unlike the popular conception of Lincolnshire as it well could be; it is not tame, and it is not flat, except to the west. Woodhall Spa is situated on a dry sandy soil where fir trees flourish, and stretching away to the east of it are wild moors, purple in season with heather, and aglow with golden gorse. It is a land of health, apart from the virtues of its waters, supposed or real. The air we found to be deliciously fragrant and bracing; I do not think that there is a purer or a more exhilarating air to be found in all England, or out of it for that matter. There are no large cities, manufacturing or otherwise, within many a long mile of the district over which the wind blows unimpeded, fresh, and invigorating from every quarter, though sheltered to a certain extent from the east winds by the Wolds beyond Horncastle. So unexpectedly pleased were we with the place; with our comfortable hotel where we felt quite at home away from home; so friendly and interesting did we find the company one and all chance-gathered there (included amongst which was a distinguished novelist; besides a poet not unknown to fame), that we elected to stay at Woodhall Spa for a week thoughwe had only at first intended to stop there the night!