MARRIAGES
In Chile marriage is simply a contract, entered into between two persons of opposite sex, regarding exclusive possession, society and service, and who by a civil, legal ceremony are pronounced husband and wife. The contract does not by implication, or actually, necessarily include protection or affection. This does not refer to marriages among the better classes, where money, social position or advantage are taken into consideration, but the poor, or middle classes, with whom marriage is a matter of convenience. With these people fidelity is not expected or demanded. The women have little to claim their attention, beyond domestic duties and personal adornment. Inherited characteristics and the influence of environments make them an easy prey to flattery, in the dispensing of which the Chilenos are artful and crafty. Evil motives, wrapped in delusive words, suggesting no interpretation of their true meaning, are the common weapons used by the men to ensnare trusting hearts guided by uneducated minds. Manly protection to woman is so rare in the sub-stratum of Chilean society as to be almost unknown.
Twenty-five years of age constitutes a legal majority for both sexes, after which marriage may be contracted at the pleasure of the interested parties. A boy of twelve or a girl of fourteen years may legally marry with the consent of parents or guardian.Once married the law declares them of legal age.
Previous to the year 1885, marriage ceremonies were celebrated only in the Catholic churches, which was recognized by the government as legal. After a prolonged and bitter discussion, a law was passed on January 10, 1884, requiring a civil registry of all births, deaths and marriages, and which deprived the church of the right to legalize marriages. This act, which went into effect January 1, 1885, recognizes as legal only marriages solemnized by the “Oficial del Registro Civil,” residing in the same municipality or sub-delegation as the contracting parties. The ceremony must be witnessed by two or more persons. Although a marriage ceremony performed by the priests has no legal import or effect, women of the Catholic faith always demand it, and most legal weddings are celebrated by two ceremonies. Even yet in some instances the civil, or legal service is disregarded, and only the church ceremony performed. Such marriages are not recognized in the courts, however, and in case of inheritance by the children born of such a union, they are barred from sharing in property rights.
There was much conflict and contention between Church and State during the first few years of the civil registry law. The priests preached violently against it, directing their efforts principally to the female members, who are the loyal supporters of all church organizations, and with whom they made the law offensive and objectionable, by refusing in many instances confession and absolution to all those who were married according to the civil law only. They were given the ultimatum of defyingthe law of the land and accepting a church marriage ceremony as binding, or excommunication. The result of these church teachings was, that for several years after the law went into effect most Catholics, and especially those representing the aristocracy, were married by the church only, not realizing, apparently, the complications that would result from such defiance of law, until their children were declared illegitimate by the courts. This created a dilemma, and a serious effort was made to legalize their marriages and legitimatize their children by a repeal or modification of the law, but without success. In the meantime the more radical members of the clergy declared that it were better to live together as husband and wife under sanction of the divine order, than to resort to civil marriage. As a compromise members of the Catholic church are now married before the “Registro Civil,” and afterwards in the Catholic church. But even now, in the rural districts of Chile, many people are married by the church only.
The party constituting the Liberal-Alliance, which was in power, and organized the ministry at the sitting of the Ordinary Session of the National Congress in June, 1904, in outlining a programme for the party, declared itself in favor of a law that would prohibit the church from celebrating marriages, without the presentation of a certificate attesting the fact that the marriage had been previously celebrated before a Civil Registrar. The Conservative party in Congress announced through its leaders its intention to vigorously oppose the measure, showing that there is still a political elementin Chile in favor of empowering the church with authority to legalize marriages.
In discussing this phase of social life, reference is made to the common people of the country, and not to the rich and educated few, where wealth, family connections, or social position may enter into and influence the question of matrimonial alliances, and among whom wedding ceremonies are conducted much as they are in other civilized countries.
Courtship is short; there are no long years of waiting. Once the question is decided the matter is consummated and all doubts as to congeniality or advisability are left for future consideration. The custom of courtship is the same as that prevailing in other Spanish-American countries. It consists more in impassioned glances, smiles and actions on the part of the participants to attract each other than in conversation or a discussion of mutual interests. Sometimes the proposition is made and accepted after the first meeting, and not infrequently it is arranged by the families of the interested parties. Whether the majority of marriages in Chile are contracted from motives of affection, passion, or material interests is difficult to determine. There would seem to be little love in the motive that inspires, for among the poorer classes the object appears to be mutual care, service and protection. During religious festivals, where men and women are brought into close relationship and intimate association, under the influence of liquor, marriages are generally arranged, proposals accepted, and bans simultaneously publishedby the contracting parties and the priests. Their past lives have been more or less the same and there are no sacrifices on the part of either. There is no demonstration to make the event conspicuous; what to expect and how to meet it are conditions well known to both. There is no foolish sentiment exhibited. The wedding is consummated and celebrated because it is mutually convenient. Their standards of honor, honesty, fidelity and veracity are about equal. Should either of the contracting parties hesitate or refuse to comply with the agreement, he or she, as the case may be, is accused before the priest of the parish church, who commands the delinquent to respond, and the marriage is celebrated at once. Protests are in vain, the marriage contract once having been announced, like the sentence in court, must be carried out, under ecclesiastical authority. Illegitimacy among the poor of Chile is no disgrace, and is not a bar, or even a disadvantage when it comes to the question of marriage. Children born to women previous to marriage are treated by the husband upon terms of equality with those of the legal union. An examination of the baptismal record of the churches in the country districts will reveal the fact that a large per cent. of the children are inscribed as “El padre desconocido” (the father is unknown).
Be it said to the credit of the women in the sub-stratum, as well as in the upper-crust of Chilean society, that, as a rule, they respect their marriage vows. With the men it is the rare exception instead of the rule. After marriage, people of the common class resume their accustomed life andhabits, living as a rule under the paternal or maternal roof of one or the other. The man is not necessarily expected to contribute to the support of his wife, the custom being for that member of the family to provide maintenance for the pair, and invariably to support herself. They seem to enjoy a careless, bohemian sort of contentment that meets the requirements of their simple lives. Little is expected, each seems entirely satisfied with the acts of the other and the stream of domestic harmony runs on uninterruptedly. Such is life among these simple folk, who mate as do the birds, and with whom mutual interests, simplicity and natural instincts are the controlling influences in matrimonial alliances.
An inventory of all property possessed by each of the contracting parties at the date of the wedding is carefully taken. It may be a horse, a cow, pig, fowls, a bed, or other articles. This property does not enter into the marriage contract and become a part of the common fund. On the wedding day the bride and groom are accompanied to the church by friends and neighbors, usually on horseback. There is singing and music of guitars, firing of shooting crackers and guns and other demonstrations. There is frequent drinking to the health of the couple, with “viva los novios.” Anyone who desires may participate in the wedding feast, as all refreshments are disposed of at a price. The profits on the feast are given to the bride as a wedding gift. These celebrations sometimes last three or four days and nights, with drinking, singing and dancing. Among the middle classes wedding ceremoniesare the same, except that invitations are not quite so general. And among the more prosperous of the middle classes, the refreshments served at the wedding feasts are free.
A married woman never goes by the name of her husband. If Señorita Carmen Valenzuela is married to Don Jacinto Nuñez, she is afterwards Señora Carmen Valenzuela de N; if she becomes a widow she retains the foregoing name with the addition of the letter V before the de N, meaning widow of Nuñez.