A Vell Vorn Motto.—In his sound and sensible reply to a congratulatory address, H.E. CardinalVaughansuggested"Amare et servire"as the motto for the Christian capitalist. To the first verb the capitalist would, it is probable, make no objection; but as to the second, he would be inclined to move as an amendment, that, "for 'i' inservireshould be substituted 'a'." At all events,Amare et servareis the narrower view taken on the broader of the two roads in life.
Author! Author!—Mr. J. L.Tooleadvertises that in consequence of "the Phenomenal Success" ofWalker—London, it is to be kept going throughout the season. Excellent. But, for the sake of Mr. J. M.Barrie, its talented author, it is to be hoped that the conditions of the performance of his popular play are not "fee nominal." But for this J. L. T.—which initials stand for Jenerous LavishToole—will have already made ample provision.
WAYS AND MEANS.WAYS AND MEANS.Kitty."Well, Viola, I think it's a perfectly lovely Photograph! The worst of Vanbrandt is that he's so awfully Expensive. What didyouPay for these?"Viola."Oh, I didn't pay anything. They took me as a Type of English Beauty, and gave me half-a-dozen for myself."Kitty."What a splendid Idea! I think I'll be done on those Terms!"
Kitty."Well, Viola, I think it's a perfectly lovely Photograph! The worst of Vanbrandt is that he's so awfully Expensive. What didyouPay for these?"
Viola."Oh, I didn't pay anything. They took me as a Type of English Beauty, and gave me half-a-dozen for myself."
Kitty."What a splendid Idea! I think I'll be done on those Terms!"
I've met (in wax)Voltaire,The atheist,Tom Paine,The "blatant beast,"Hébert,Called also "PèreDuchêne";The bluff SirHarry Vane,The boys' delight,Defoe,BraveAbraham Duquesne,And"Bayard" Oudinot.Fell "Jeanqui rit"Barrère,The Tartar,Tamerlane,The "sea-green"Robespierre,The sportive "Pea-Green"Hayne.The boxer, "Big Ben"Brain,The convert,Bendigo,The socialWalter Crane,And gayBoccaccio.The gloomyBaudelaire,The wise ProfessorBain,Truth-lovingLabouchere,The anatomicQuain,The dramatist,Sedaine;The polishedMarivaux,The able critic,Taine,And keenLa Rochefoucauld.The learnèd brothersHare,The "mummer,"John Maclean,The dismal poet,Blair,The funnyCorney Grain;That "innocent,"Mark Twain,The Spaniard,Candamo,The gentleJulian Fane,AndEdgar Allan Poe.The perjured knight,Macaire,The recreantBazaine,The piousLacordaire,The Anglophobist,Blaine;The rebel Gen'ralWayne,The gen'rousWaterlow,The "good time coming"Swain,And wise oldCicero.The Dutch sea-dog,Le Maire,The warlike PrinceEugène,The gallant Earl ofStair;GrimPhilip, King of Spain,Our SaxonAthelstane,The false queen,Isabeau,The nine days queen, QueenJane,And Madamed'Houdetot.My LadyCastlemaine,The ghostly Mrs.Crowe,The fleshyEveleen Rayne,And Mrs.Beecher Stowe.
I've met (in wax)Voltaire,The atheist,Tom Paine,The "blatant beast,"Hébert,Called also "PèreDuchêne";The bluff SirHarry Vane,The boys' delight,Defoe,BraveAbraham Duquesne,And"Bayard" Oudinot.
I've met (in wax)Voltaire,
The atheist,Tom Paine,
The "blatant beast,"Hébert,
Called also "PèreDuchêne";
The bluff SirHarry Vane,
The boys' delight,Defoe,
BraveAbraham Duquesne,
And"Bayard" Oudinot.
Fell "Jeanqui rit"Barrère,The Tartar,Tamerlane,The "sea-green"Robespierre,The sportive "Pea-Green"Hayne.The boxer, "Big Ben"Brain,The convert,Bendigo,The socialWalter Crane,And gayBoccaccio.
Fell "Jeanqui rit"Barrère,
The Tartar,Tamerlane,
The "sea-green"Robespierre,
The sportive "Pea-Green"Hayne.
The boxer, "Big Ben"Brain,
The convert,Bendigo,
The socialWalter Crane,
And gayBoccaccio.
The gloomyBaudelaire,The wise ProfessorBain,Truth-lovingLabouchere,The anatomicQuain,The dramatist,Sedaine;The polishedMarivaux,The able critic,Taine,And keenLa Rochefoucauld.
The gloomyBaudelaire,
The wise ProfessorBain,
Truth-lovingLabouchere,
The anatomicQuain,
The dramatist,Sedaine;
The polishedMarivaux,
The able critic,Taine,
And keenLa Rochefoucauld.
The learnèd brothersHare,The "mummer,"John Maclean,The dismal poet,Blair,The funnyCorney Grain;That "innocent,"Mark Twain,The Spaniard,Candamo,The gentleJulian Fane,AndEdgar Allan Poe.
The learnèd brothersHare,
The "mummer,"John Maclean,
The dismal poet,Blair,
The funnyCorney Grain;
That "innocent,"Mark Twain,
The Spaniard,Candamo,
The gentleJulian Fane,
AndEdgar Allan Poe.
The perjured knight,Macaire,The recreantBazaine,The piousLacordaire,The Anglophobist,Blaine;The rebel Gen'ralWayne,The gen'rousWaterlow,The "good time coming"Swain,And wise oldCicero.
The perjured knight,Macaire,
The recreantBazaine,
The piousLacordaire,
The Anglophobist,Blaine;
The rebel Gen'ralWayne,
The gen'rousWaterlow,
The "good time coming"Swain,
And wise oldCicero.
The Dutch sea-dog,Le Maire,The warlike PrinceEugène,The gallant Earl ofStair;GrimPhilip, King of Spain,Our SaxonAthelstane,The false queen,Isabeau,The nine days queen, QueenJane,And Madamed'Houdetot.
The Dutch sea-dog,Le Maire,
The warlike PrinceEugène,
The gallant Earl ofStair;
GrimPhilip, King of Spain,
Our SaxonAthelstane,
The false queen,Isabeau,
The nine days queen, QueenJane,
And Madamed'Houdetot.
My LadyCastlemaine,The ghostly Mrs.Crowe,The fleshyEveleen Rayne,And Mrs.Beecher Stowe.
My LadyCastlemaine,
The ghostly Mrs.Crowe,
The fleshyEveleen Rayne,
And Mrs.Beecher Stowe.
House of Commons, Thursday, April 6.—Met again after so-called Easter Holidays. Mr. G. early in his place, looking as blooming as the Spring flower in his buttonhole. "TheBright 'unfrom Brighton," wasMarjoribanks'sway of announcing the Chief, as he entered from behindSpeaker'sChair. Spoke for hour-and-half on moving Second Reading of Home-Rule Bill. General impression is everything possible been already said on subject. This conviction so deeply impressed that Members will not come back to resume Debate. Benches only half full whilst Mr. G. delivering what will rank as historic speech. Situation accepted to extent that ten days or fortnight must be given up to Second-Reading Debate. Wouldn't be respectful, or even decent, to dispose of stage of such a measure in less time. Well known that this Sahara of observation will not influence single vote. If arrangements had been made with due notice to take division to-night, after Mr. G. had urged Second Reading of Bill, andHicks-Beachhad moved rejection, the majority would have been exactly the same as it will be a fortnight hence, when end is reached after multitudinous talk. Not by a vote more, nor a vote less, will Government majority be varied. Still, usual thing to talk for week or fortnight upon Bill of this kind. House will not fail in its duty toQueenand Country. A dolorous prospect, judging from to-night's experience. Mr. G. kept audience well together. Members increased as he spoke; but whenSt. Michaelrose, audience dispersed like leaves in wintry weather.
"An excellent fellowBeach," saidCampbell-Bannerman, "But in his House of Commons speech always gives one the idea that, through a blameless existence, he has been rolled upon by the melancholy ocean."
'THE POLITICAL SANDOW.'"THE POLITICAL SANDOW."How Much More will he Bear?
'THE UPPER G.'"THE UPPER G.""When the fair land of PolandWas ploughed by the hoofOf the ruthless invader untilThe down-trodden serfsWith small hope and no 'oof'Demanded a great Home-Rule Bill!"
"When the fair land of PolandWas ploughed by the hoofOf the ruthless invader untilThe down-trodden serfsWith small hope and no 'oof'Demanded a great Home-Rule Bill!"
"When the fair land of PolandWas ploughed by the hoofOf the ruthless invader untilThe down-trodden serfsWith small hope and no 'oof'Demanded a great Home-Rule Bill!"
"When the fair land of Poland
Was ploughed by the hoof
Of the ruthless invader until
The down-trodden serfs
With small hope and no 'oof'
Demanded a great Home-Rule Bill!"
Certainly his speech has depressing effect. Members, with one consent, go out to think over what he is probably going to say. Convenient arrangement for them, but does not add to hilarity of proceedings, or vary impressionCampbell-Bannerman'sfigure of speech conveys.
AfterBeach, Birrell, with a new chapter ofObiter Dicta. Some of the smartest things addressed to the empty seat whereChamberlainshould have been on view. ButJosephnot yet come up out of Egypt. Had he been here, and House a little fuller, the new chapter would have gone off capitally. As things turned out, there was a fatal unreality in situation, which House quick to realise. Pretty to see Members, asBirrellstruggled with his notes, involuntarily sniffing, as if they recognised familiar whiff of midnight lamp.
"Worst of these impromptus prepared beforehand," saidSt. John Brodrick, himself a master of spontaneous speech, "is, you never know in what circumstances they may have to be delivered."
Towards midnight, some refreshment in the incursion ofSwift Macneill. Came up smiling; handing himself round, as it were, for inspection, as sample of kind of persecution of Protestants that would follow in Ulster on enactment of Home-Rule Bill. "I'm a Protestant, Mr.Speaker," he shouted, beaming on the Chair, "and I'm sent here by a majority of 2,500 Catholic peasants to represent an Ulster Constituency."
The Hattitude of Dr. Tanner, Thursday morning,The Hattitude of Dr. Tanner, Thursday morning, April 6.
Swift Macneill'ssmile infectious. It illumined with something of saintly halo the depressed figure of Dr.Barton, who, again breaking his vow of silence, confessed that yesterday he had been enrolled as Member of an Organisation in Ulster sworn to resist Home-Rule. "I don't know, Mr.Speaker," he said, in hoarse whisper, "what that act may involve, and I don't care. It may lead to my spending the remainder of my days in penal servitude." Whereat the jaded House merrily laughed.
Business done.—Second Reading Home-Rule Bill moved.
Friday.—A dull night, my masters. Still harping on Home Rule. Second night's debate on Second Reading. Naturally supposed to be in heyday of vigour. But Benches empty; level of oratory third-rate;Stansfelda hoary Triton among the Minnows;Ellis Ashmead Bartlett(Knight) gloomily views the scene. "Thought you were going to speak to-night?" I said, "Read the announcement in the papers." Never forget the haughty, withering glance ofEllis Ashmead.
"Sir," he said, "I talk only with my peers."
So suppose we shall have him one day next week, whenChamberlain, Grandolph, andBalfourtake part in fray. Begins to look as if, for all practical purposes, might as well have deferred meeting of House till Monday.
"Mr. G. a great man," saysDavitt. "Insisted upon us coming back on Thursday, to debate Home-Rule Bill. He can do most things; he can bring a horse to the water, but he can't make him debate."
Business done.—Eight hours' talk round Home-Rule Bill.
Influence of Music.—I recently noticed a paragraph in a Medical Journal advising persons suffering from Insomnia to try a musical box in their bed-rooms; and I therefore purchased a rather expensive one, which plays six tunes, with drum and trumpet accompaniment. Something seems to have gone wrong with the mechanism, as, after being fully wound up, it remains obstinately silent for an hour or so, at the end of which period it suddenly starts off at break-neck speed, and repeats one of the tunes backwards over and over again. Nothing that I can do will stop it. Could some musical expert kindly advise in this case? After a most agitated night, due to the vagaries of the instrument, I took it into bed with me, hoping to drown the noise; but the vibration of the drums under the bed-clothes was terrific! I then placed the machine in my bath, and covered it with water; but it continued to play with undiminished vigour. It is still playing. Some Museum, or a Government engaged in sub-marine experiments, might like to have it; or it might be suited for a Deaf and Dumb Asylum. It will be sold cheap.
St. Cecilian.
["Several carriage-makers in London have, it is said, received orders of late for Sedan chairs."—Daily Paper.]
["Several carriage-makers in London have, it is said, received orders of late for Sedan chairs."—Daily Paper.]
Whatwonder if our hansom-hiring FairShould now adopt a coach distinctly rarer?As Cabby often treats them like a bear,Henceforth our ladies may prefer a bearer!
Whatwonder if our hansom-hiring FairShould now adopt a coach distinctly rarer?As Cabby often treats them like a bear,Henceforth our ladies may prefer a bearer!
Whatwonder if our hansom-hiring Fair
Should now adopt a coach distinctly rarer?
As Cabby often treats them like a bear,
Henceforth our ladies may prefer a bearer!
"The Silver Shell."—Mr.H. J. W. Dam'snew Play (the initial letters, save the name—and as to the name,absit omen!) treats of Russian life. There is a "toff" in it, played by Mr.Kendal, whose name isPrince Karatoff, which reminds us of theDuke of Turniptop. Or, if he is aninsouciantsort of person, he would more properly be titled,Prince Don't-Kar-a-toff. Unfortunate name, too, isBoris Ivanitch. Perhaps a Big Bore isIvanitch; and as to the family title, Ivanitch—well, considered theatrically, it sounds unpleasantly like belonging to a scratch company. There's a bomb in it, which, we were informed, in aD. T.note, "appears as part of the furniture of a drawing-room." The entire furniture-covering is made, we are privately informed, of "bombazine," and the explosion may be expected to be terrific. For the sake of the clever Managers of the Court, not forgetting theirH. J. W. Damclever author, we trustThe Silver Shellwill be, for many months to come, an occasion for the public to silver shell out.
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