1 This gentleman, whose dress and appearance indicate something of the Dandy, is a resident in Mark Lane, and usually spends his evening at the Round Table, where he appears to pride himself upon producing the finest segars that can be procured, and generally affords some of his friends an opportunity of proving them deserving the recommendations with which he never fails to present them.
This proposition was received with applause, and, upon Tom's giving a hint, Frank Harry was called upon—the glasses were filled, a toast was given, and the bowl was dispatched for a replenish; he then sung the following Song, accompanied with voice, manner, and action, well calculated to rivet attention and obtain applause:
PIGGISH PROPENSITIES, THE BUMPKIN IN TOWN. “A Bumpkin to London one morning in Spring, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la, Took a fat pig to market, his leg in a string, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la; The clown drove him forward, while piggy, good lack! Lik'd his old home so well, he still tried to run back—
(Spoken)—Coome, coome (said the Bumpkin to himself,) Lunnun is the grand mart for every thing; there they have their Auction Marts, their Coffee Marts, and their Linen Marts: and as they are fond of a tid-bit of country pork, I see no reason why they should not have” a Pork and Bacon Mart—so get on (pig grunts,) I am glad to hear you have a voice on the subject, though it seems not quite in tune with my
Hey derry, ho derry, fal de ral la. It chanc'd on the road they'd a dreadful disaster, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la; The grunter ran back 'twixt the legs of his master, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la; The Bumpkin he came to the ground in a crack, And the pig, getting loose, he ran all the way back!
(Spoken)—Hallo, (said the clown, scrambling up again, and scratching his broken head,) to be sure I have heard of sleight-of-hand, hocus-pocus and sich like; but by gum this here be a new manouvre called sleight of legs; however as no boanes be broken between us, I'll endeavour to make use on 'em once more in following the game in view: so here goes, with a
Hey derry, ho derry, &c. He set off again with his pig in a rope, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la, Reach'd London, and now for good sale 'gan to hope Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la; But the pig, being beat 'till his bones were quite sore. Turning restive, rush'd in at a brandy-shop door.
(Spoken)—The genteeler and politer part of the world might feel a little inclined to call this piggish behaviour; but certainly after a long and fatiguing journey, nothing can be more refreshing than adrap of the cratur; and deeming this the regular mart for the good stuff, in he bolts, leaving his master to sing as long as he pleased—Hey derry, he deny, &c.
Here three snuffy Tabbies he put to the rout, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai lft, With three drams to the quartern, that moment serv'd out, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la; The pig gave a grunt, and the clown gave a roar, When the whole of the party lay flat on the floor!
(Spoken)—Yes, there they lay all of a lump; and a precious group there was of them: The old women, well prun'd with snuff and twopenny, and bang-up with gin and bitters—the fair ones squalled; the clown growled like a bear with a broken head; the landlord, seeing all that could be seen as they roll'd over each other, stared, like a stuck pig! while this grand chorus of soft and sweet voices from the swinish multitude was accompanied by the pig with his usual grunt, and a
Hey derry, ho derry, &o. The pig soon arose, and the door open flew, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de ral la, When this scrambling group was expos'd to my view, Hey deny, ho derry, fal de ral la; He set off again, without waiting for Jack, And not liking London, ran all the way back!
(Spoken)—The devil take the pig! (said the Bumpkin) he is more trouble than enough. “The devil take you (said Miss Sukey Snuffle) for you are the greatest hog of the two; I dare say, if the truth was known, you are brothers.”—“I declare I never was so exposed in all my life (said Miss Delia Doldrum.) There's my beautiful bloom petticoat, that never was rumpled before in all my life—I'm quite shock'd!”—“Never mind, (said the landlord) nobody cares about it; tho' I confess it was a shocking affair.”—'I wish he and his pigs were in the horse-pond (continued she, endeavouring to hide her blushes with her hand)—Oh my—oh my!'—“What?” (said Boniface)—'Oh, my elbow! (squall'd out Miss Emilia Mumble) I am sure I shall never get over it.'—“Oh yes you will (continued he) rise again, cheer your spirits with another drop of old Tom, and you'll soon be able to sing
Hey derry, ho derry, &c. By mutual consent the old women all swore, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la, That the clown was a brute, and his pig was a boar, Hey derry, ho derry, fal de rai la; He paid for their liquor, but grumbled, good lack, Without money or pig to gang all the way back.
(Spoken)—By gum (said he to himself, as he turn'd from the door) if the Lunneners likes country pork, country pork doant seem to like they; and if this be the success I'm to expect in this mighty great town in search of the Grand Mart, I'll come no more, for I thinks as how its all a flax; therefore I'll make myself contented to set at home in my own chimney corner in the country, and sing
Hey derry, ho derry, &c.
This song had attracted the attention of almost every one in the room; there was a spirit and vivacity in the singer, combined with a power of abruptly changing his voice, to give effect to the different passages, and a knowledge of music as well as of character, which gave it an irresistible charm; and the company, who had assembled round him, at the close signified their approbation by a universal shout of applause.
All went on well—songs, toasts and sentiments—punch, puns and witticisms, were handed about in abundance; in the mean time, the room began to wear an appearance of thinness, many of the boxes were completely deserted, and the Knights of the Bound Table were no longer surrounded by their Esquires—still the joys of the bowl were exhilarating, and the conversation agreeable, though at times a little more in a strain of vociferation than had been manifested at the entrance of our party. It was no time to ask questions as to the names and occupations of the persons by whom he was surrounded; and Bob, plainly perceiving Frank Harry was getting into Queer Street, very prudently declined all interrogatories for the present, making, however, a determination within himself to know more of the house and the company.
Mortimer also discovered symptoms of lush-logic, for though he had an inclination to keep up the chaff, his dictionary appeared to be new modelled, and his lingo abridged by repeated clips at his mother tongue, by which he afforded considerable food for laughter.
Perceiving this, Tallyho thought it prudent to give his Cousin a hint, which was immediately taken, and the party broke up.