Strange to say, in spite of everything, my sleep refreshed me. I woke up in the morning strong and vigorous—thank goodness, I have physically a magnificent constitution—and packed my box, with Jane’s help, for my Torquay expedition.
I went up to London and down to Torquay alone, though Jane offered to accompany me. I was learning to be self-reliant. It suited my plans better. Nobody could bear this burden for me but myself; and the sooner I learnt to bear it my own way, the happier for me.
At Torquay station, to my great surprise, a fresh-looking girl of my own age rushed up to me suddenly, and kissed me without one word of warning. She was a very pretty girl, pink-cheeked and hazel-eyed: and as she kissed me, she seized both my hands in hers, and cried out to me frankly:
“Why, there you are, Una dear! Cousin Emma telegraphed us what train you’d arrive by; so I’ve driven down to meet you. And now, you’re coming up with us this very minute in the pony-carriage.”
“You’re Minnie Moore, I suppose?” I said, gazing at her admiringly. Her sweet, frank smile and apple-blossom cheek somehow inspired me with confidence.
She looked back at me quite distressed. Tears rose at once into her eyes with true Celtic suddenness.
“Oh, Una,” she cried, deeply hurt and drawing back into her shell, “don’t tell me you don’t know me! Why, I’m Minnie! Minnie!”
My heart went out to her at once. I took her hand in mine again.
“Minnie dear,” I said softly, quite remorseful for my mistake, “you must remember what has happened to me, and not be angry. I’ve forgotten everything, even my own past life. I’ve forgotten that I ever before set eyes upon you. But, my dear, there’s one thing I’ve NOT in a way forgotten; and that is, that I loved you and love you dearly. And I ‘ll give you a proof of it. When I started, I knew none of you; and I told Aunt Emma I wouldn’t go among strangers. The moment I see you, I know you’re no stranger, but a very dear cousin. When I’ve forgotten MYSELF, how can I remember YOU? But I’ll go up with you at once. And I’ll countermand the room I ordered by telegram at the Imperial.”
The tears stood fuller in Minnie’s eyes than before. She clasped my hand hard. Her pretty lips trembled.
“Una darling,” she said, “we always were friends, and we always shall be. If you love me, that’s all. You’re a darling. I love you.”
I looked at her sweet face, and knew it was true. And oh, I was so glad to have a new friend—an old friend, already! For somehow, as always, while the intellectual recollection had faded, the emotion survived. I felt as if I’d known Minnie Moore for years, though I never remembered to have seen her in my life till that minute.
Well, I remained at the Moores’ for a week, and felt quite at home there. They were all very nice, Cousin Willie, and Aunt Emily (she made me call her aunt; she said I’d always done so), and Minnie, and all of them. They were really dear people; and blood, after all, is thicker than water. But I made no haste to push inquiries just at first. I preferred to feel my way. I wanted to find out what they knew, if anything, about Berry Pomeroy.
The first time I ventured to mention the subject to Minnie, she gave a very queer smile—a smile of maidenly badinage.
“Well, you remember THAT, any way,” she said, in a teasing little way, looking down at me and laughing. “I thought you’d remember that. I must say you enjoyed yourself wonderfully at Berry Pomeroy!”
“Remember what?” I cried, all eagerness; for I saw she attached some special importance to the recollection. And yet, it was terrible she should jest about the clue to my father’s murderer!
Minnie looked arch. When she looked arch, she was charming.
“Why, I never saw you prettier or more engaging in your life than you were that day,” she said evasively, as if trying to pique me. “And you flirted so much, too! And everybody admired you so. Everybody on the grounds... especially one person!”
I looked up at her in surprise. I was in my own room, seated by the dressing-table, late at night, when we’d gone up to bed; and Minnie was beside me, standing up, with her bedroom candle in that pretty white little hand of hers.
“What do you mean?” I exclaimed eagerly. “Was it a dance—or a picnic?”
“Oh, you know very well,” Minnie went on teasingly, “though you pretend you forget. HE was there, don’t you know. You must remember HIM, if you’ve forgotten all the rest of your previous life. You say you remember the appropriate emotions. Well, he was an emotion: at least, you thought so. It was an Athletic Club Meeting: and Dr. Ivor was there. He went across on his bicycle.”
I gave a start of surprise. Minnie looked down at me half maliciously.
“There, you see,” she said archly again, “at Dr. Ivor you change colour. I told you you’d remember him!”
I grew pale with astonishment.
“Minnie dear,” I said, holding her hands very tight in my own, “it wasn’t that, I assure you. I’ve forgotten him, utterly. If ever I knew a Dr. Ivor, if ever I flirted with him, as you seem to imply, he’s gone clean out of my head. His name stirs no chord—recalls absolutely nothing. But I want to know about that Athletic Meeting. Was my poor father there that day? And did he take a set of photographs?”
Minnie clapped her hands triumphantly.
“I KNEW you remembered!” she cried. “Of course, Cousin Vivian was there. We drove over in a break. You MUST remember that. And he took a whole lot of instantaneous photographs.”
My hand trembled violently in my cousin’s. I felt I was now on the very eve of a great discovery.
“Minnie,” I said, tentatively, “do you think your papa would drive us over some day and—and show us the place again?”
“Of course he would, dear,” Minnie answered, with a gentle pressure of my hand. “He’d be only too delighted. Whatever you choose. You know you were always such a favourite of daddy’s.”
I knew nothing of the sort; but I was glad to learn it. I drew Minnie out a little more about the Athletics and my visit to Berry Pomeroy. She wouldn’t tell me much: she was too illusive and indefinite: she never could get the notion out of her head, somehow, that I remembered all about it, and was only pretending to forgetfulness. But I gathered from what she said, that Dr. Ivor and I must have flirted a great deal; or, at least, that he must have paid me a good lot of attention. My father didn’t like it, Minnie said; he thought Dr. Ivor wasn’t well enough off to marry me. He was a distant cousin of ours, of course—everything was always “of course” with that dear bright Minnie—what, didn’t I know that? Oh, yes, his mother was one of the Moores of Barnstaple, cousin Edward’s people. His name was Courtenay Moore Ivor, you know—though I knew nothing of the sort. And he was awfully clever. And, oh, so handsome!
“Is he at Berry Pomeroy still?” I asked, trembling, thinking this would be a good person to get information from about the people at the Athletic Sports.
“Oh dear, no,” Minnie answered, looking hard at me, curiously. “He was never at Berry Pomeroy. He had a practice at Babbicombe. He’s in Canada now, you know. He went over six months after Cousin Vivian’s death. I think, dear,”—she hesitated,—“he never QUITE got over your entirely forgetting him, even if you forgot your whole past history.”
This was a curious romance to me, that Minnie thus sprang on me—a romance of my own past life of which I myself knew nothing.
We sat late talking, and I could see Minnie was very full indeed of Dr. Ivor. Over and over again she recurred to his name, and always as though she thought it might rouse some latent chord in my memory. But nothing came of it. If ever I had cared for Dr. Ivor at all, that feeling had passed away utterly with the rest of my experiences.
When Minnie rose to go, I took her hand once more in mine. As I did so, I started. Something about it seemed strangely familiar. I looked at it close with a keen glance. Why, this was curious! It was Aunt Emma’s hand: it was my mother’s hand: it was the hand in my mental Picture: it was the hand of the murderer!
“It’s just like auntie’s,” I said with an effort, seeing Minnie noticed my start.
She looked at it and laughed.
“The Moore hand,” she said gaily. “We all have it, except you. It’s awfully persistent.”
I turned it over in front and examined the palm. At sight of it my brain reeled. This was surely magic! Minnie Moore’s hand, too, was scarred over with cuts, exactly like Aunt Emma’s!
“Why, how on earth did you do that?” I cried, thunderstruck at the discovery.
But Minnie only laughed again, a bright girlish laugh.
“Climbing over that beastly wall at The Grange,” she said with a merry look. “Oh, what fun we did have! We climbed it together. We were dreadful tomboys in those days, dear, you and I: but you were luckier than I was, and didn’t cut yourself with the bottle-glass.”
This was too surprising to be passed over unnoticed. When Minnie was gone, I lay awake and pondered about it. Had all the Moores got scars on their hands, I wondered? And how many people, I asked myself, had cut themselves time and again in climbing over that barricaded garden-wall of my father’s?
The Moore hand might be hereditary, but not surely the scars. Was the murderer, then, a Moore, and was that the meaning of Dr. Marten’s warning?
Two days later, Cousin Willie drove us over to Berry Pomeroy. The lion of the place is the castle, of course; but Minnie had told him beforehand I wanted, for reasons of my own, to visit the cricket-field where the sports were held “the year Dr. Ivor won the mile race, you remember.” So we went there straight. As soon as we entered, I recognised the field at once, and the pavilion, and the woods, as being precisely the same as those presented in the photograph. But I got no further than that. The captain of the cricket-club was on the ground that day, and I managed to get into conversation with him, and strolled off in the grounds. There I showed him the photograph, and asked if he could identify the man climbing over the wagon: but he said he couldn’t recognise him. Somebody or other from Torquay, perhaps; not a regular resident. The figures were so small, and so difficult to make sure about. If I’d leave him the photograph, perhaps—but at that I drew back, for I didn’t want anybody, least of all at Torquay, to know what quest I was engaged upon.
We drove back, a merry party enough, in spite of my failure. Minnie was always so jolly, and her mirth was contagious. She talked all the way still of Dr. Ivor, half-teasing me. It was all very well my pretending not to remember, she said; but why did I want to see the cricket-field if it wasn’t for that? Poor Courtenay! if only he knew, how delighted he’d be to know he wasn’t forgotten! For he really took it to heart, my illness—she always called it my illness, and so I suppose it was. From the day I lost my memory, nothing seemed to go right with him; and he was never content till he went and buried himself somewhere in the wilds of Canada.
That evening again, I sat with Minnie in my room. I was depressed and distressed. I didn’t want to cry before Minnie, but I could have cried with good heart for sheer vexation. Of course I couldn’t bear to go showing the photograph to all the world, and letting everybody see I’d made myself a sort of amateur detective. They would mistake my motives so. And yet I didn’t know how I was ever to find out my man any other way. It was that or nothing. I made up my mind I would ask Cousin Willie.
I took out the photograph, as if unintentionally, when I went to my box, and laid it down with my curling-tongs on the table close by Minnie. Minnie took it up abstractedly and looked at it with an indefinite gaze.
“Why, this is the cricket-field!” she cried, as soon as she collected her senses. “One of your father’s experiments. The earliest acmegraphs. How splendidly they come out! See, that’s Sir Everard at the bottom; and there’s little Jack Hillier above; and this on one side’s Captain Brooks; and there, in front of all—well, you know HIM anyhow, Una. Now, don’t pretend you forget! That’s Courtenay Ivor!”
Her finger was on the man who stood poised ready to jump. With an awful recoil, I drew back and suppressed a scream. It was on the tip of my tongue to cry out, “Why, that’s my father’s murderer!”
But, happily, with a great effort of will I restrained myself. I saw it all at a glance. That, then, was the meaning of Dr. Marten’s warning! No wonder, I thought, the shock had disorganised my whole brain. If Minnie was right, I was in love once with that man. And I must have seen my lover murder my father!
For I didn’t doubt, from what Minnie said, I had really once loved Dr. Ivor. Horrible and ghastly as it might be to realise it, I didn’t doubt it was the truth. I had once loved the very man I was now bent on pursuing as a criminal and a murderer!
“You’re sure that’s him, Minnie?” I cried, trying to conceal my agitation. “You’re sure that’s Courtenay Ivor, the man stooping on the wagon-top?”
Minnie looked at me, smiling. She thought I was asking for a very different reason.
“Yes, that’s him, right enough, dear,” she said. “I could tell him among a thousand. Why, the Moore hand alone would be quite enough to know him by. It’s just like my own. We’ve all of us got it—except yourself. I always said you weren’t one of us. You’re a regular born Callingham.”
I gazed at her fixedly. I could hardly speak.
“Oh, Minnie!” I cried once more, “have you ... have you any photograph of him?”
“No, we haven’t, dear,” Minnie answered.
“That was a fad of Courtenay’s, you know. Wherever he went, he’d never be photographed. He was annoyed that day that your father should have taken him unawares. He hated being ‘done,’ he said. He’s so handsome and so nice, but he’s not a bit conceited. And he was such a splendid bicyclist! He rode over and back on his bicycle that day, and then ran in all the races as if it were nothing.”
A light burst over me at once. This was circumstantial evidence. The murderer who disappeared as if by magic the moment his crime was committed must have come and gone all unseen, no doubt, on his bicycle. He must have left it under the window till his vile deed was done, and then leapt out upon it in a second and dashed off whence he came like a flash of lightning.
It was a premeditated crime, in that case, not the mere casual result of a sudden quarrel.
I must find out this man now, were it only to relieve my own sense of mystery.
“Minnie,” I said once more, screwing up my courage to ask, “where’s Dr. Ivor now? I mean—that is to say—in what part of Canada?”
Minnie looked at me and laughed.
“There, I told you so!” she said, merrily. “It’s not the least bit of use your pretending you’re not in love with him, Una. Why, just look how you tremble! You’re as white as a ghost! And then you say you don’t care for poor Courtenay! I forget the exact name of the place where he lives, but I’ve got it in my desk, and I can tell you to-morrow.—Oh, yes; it’s Palmyra, on the Canada Pacific. I suppose you want to write to him. Or perhaps you mean to go out and offer yourself bodily.”
It was awful having to bottle up the truth in one’s own heart, and to laugh and jest like this; but I endured it somehow.
“No, it’s not that,” I said gravely. “I’ve other reasons of my own for asking his address, Minnie. I want to go out there, it’s true; but not because I cherish the faintest pleasing recollection of Dr. Ivor in any way.”
Minnie scanned me over in surprise.
“Well, how you ARE altered, Una!” she cried. “I love you, dear, and like you every bit as much as ever. But you’ve changed so much. I don’t think you’re at all what you used to be. You’re so grave and sombre.”
“No wonder, Minnie,” I exclaimed, bursting gladly into tears—the excuse was such a relief—“no wonder, when you think how much I’ve passed through!”
Minnie flung her arms around my neck, and kissed me over and over again.
“Oh, dear!” she cried, melting. “What have I done? What have I said? I ought never to have spoken so. It was cruel of me—cruel, Una dear. I shall stop here to-night, and sleep with you.”
“Oh, thank you, darling!” I cried. “Minnie, that IS good of you. I’m so awfully glad. For to-morrow I must be thinking of getting ready for Canada.”
“Canada!” Minnie exclaimed, alarmed. “You’re not really going to Canada! Oh, Una, you’re joking! You don’t mean to say you’re going out there to find him!”
I took her hand in mine, and held it up in the air above her head solemnly.
“Dear cousin,” I said, “I love you. But you must promise me this one thing. Whatever may happen, give me your sacred word of honour you’ll never tell anybody what we’ve said here to-night. You’ll kill me if you do. I don’t want any living soul on earth to know of it.”
I spoke so seriously, Minnie felt it was important.
“I promise you,” she answered, growing suddenly far graver than her wont. “Oh, Una, I haven’t the faintest idea what you mean, but no torture on earth shall ever wring a word of it from me!”
So I went to bed in her arms, and cried myself to sleep, thinking with my latest breath, in a tremor of horror, that I’d found it at last. Courtenay Ivor was the name of my father’s murderer!
The voyage across the Atlantic was long and uneventful. No whales, no icebergs, no excitement of any sort. My fellow-passengers said it was as dull as it was calm. But as for me, I had plenty to occupy my mind meanwhile. Strange things had happened in the interval, and were happening to me on the way. Strange things, in part, of my own internal history.
For before I left England, as I sat with Aunt Emma in her little drawing-room at Barton-on-the-Sea, discussing my plans and devising routes westward, she made me, quite suddenly, an unexpected confession.
“Una,” she said, after a long pause, “you haven’t told me, my dear, why you’re going to Canada. And I don’t want to ask you. I know pretty well. We needn’t touch upon that. You’re going to hunt up some supposed clue to the murderer.”
“Perhaps so, Auntie,” I said oracularly: “and perhaps not.”
For I didn’t want it to get talked about and be put into all the newspapers. And I knew now if I wanted to keep it out, I must first be silent.
Aunt Emma drew nearer and took my hand in hers. At the same time, she held up the other scarred and lacerated palm.
“Do you know when I got that, Una?” she asked with a sudden burst. “Well, I’ll tell you, my child.... It was the night of your father’s death. And I got it climbing over the wall at The Grange, to escape detection.”
My blood ran cold once more. What on earth could this mean? Had Auntie—? But no. I had the evidence of my own senses that it was Courtenay Ivor. I’d tracked him down now. There was no room for doubt. The man on the wagon was the man who fired the shot. I could have sworn to that bent back, of my own knowledge, among a thousand.
I hadn’t long to wait, however. Auntie went on after a short pause.
“I was there,” she said, “by accident, trying for once to see you.”
I looked at her fixedly still, and still I said nothing.
“I was stopping with friends at the time, ten miles off from Woodbury,” Aunt Emma went on, smoothing my hand with hers, “and I longed so to see you. I came over by train that day, and stopped late about the town in hopes I might meet you in the street. But I was disappointed. Towards evening I ventured even to go into the grounds of The Grange, and look about everywhere on the chance that I might see you. Perhaps your father might be out. I went round towards the window, which I now know to be the library. As I went, I saw a bicycle leaning up against the wall by the window. I thought that must be some visitor, but still I went on. But just as I reached the window, I saw a flash of electric light; and by the light, I could make out your father’s head and beard. He looked as if he were talking angrily and loudly to somebody. The window was open. I was afraid to stop longer. In a sudden access of fear, I ran across the shrubbery towards the garden-wall. To tell you the truth, I was horribly frightened. Why, I don’t know; for nothing had happened as yet. I suppose it was just the dusk and the mean sense of intrusion.”
She paused and wiped her brow. I sat still, and listened eagerly.
“Presently,” she went on, very low, “as I ran and ran, I heard behind me a loud crash—a sound as of a pistol-shot. That terrified me still more. I thought I was being pursued. Perhaps they took me for a burglar. In the agony of my terror, I rushed at the wall in mad haste, and climbed over it anyhow. In climbing, I tore my hand, as you see, and made myself bleed, oh, terribly! However, I persevered, and got down on the other side, with my clothes very little the worse for the scramble. And, fortunately, I was carrying a small light dust-cloak: I put it on at once, and it covered up everything. Then I began to walk along the road as fast as I could in the direction of the station. As I did so, a bicycle shot out from the gate in the opposite direction, going as hard as it could spin, simply flying towards Whittingham. Three minutes later, a man came up to me, breathless. It was the gardener at The Grange, I believe.
“‘Have you seen anybody go this way?’ he asked. ‘A young man, running hard? A young man in knickerbockers?’
“‘N—no,’ I answered, trembling; for I was afraid to confess. ‘Not a soul has gone past!’
“Of course, I didn’t know of the murder as yet; and I only wanted to get off unperceived to the station.
“I’d bound up my hand in my handkerchief by that time, and held it tight under my cloak. I went back by train unnoticed, and returned to my friends’ house. I hadn’t even told them I was going to Woodbury at all. I pretended I’d been spending the day at Whittingham. Next morning, I read in the paper of your father’s murder.”
I stared hard at Aunt Emma.
“Why didn’t you tell me this long ago?” I cried, in an agony of suspense. “Why didn’t you give evidence and say so at the inquest?”
“How could I?” Aunt Emma answered, looking back at me appealingly. “The circumstances were too suspicious. As it was, everybody was running after the young man in knickerbockers. Nobody took any notice of a little old lady in a long grey dust-cloak. But if once I’d confessed and shown my wounded hand, who would ever have believed I’d nothing to do with the murder?—except you, perhaps, Una. Oh no: I came back here to my own home as fast as ever I could; for I was really ill. I took to my bed at once. And as nobody called me to give evidence at the inquest, I said nothing to anybody.”
“But the bicycle!” I cried. “The bicycle! You ought to have mentioned that. You were the only one who saw it. It was a clue to the murderer.”
“If I’d told,” Aunt Emma answered, “I should never have been allowed to take charge of you at all. I thought my one clear duty was to my sister’s child: it was to take care of your health in your shattered condition. And even now, Una, I tell you only for this: if you find out anything new, in Canada or here, try not to drag me into it. I couldn’t stand the strain. Cross-examination would kill me.”
“I’ll remember it, auntie,” I said, wearied out with excitement. “But I think you did wrong, all the same. In a case like this, it’s everybody’s first duty to tell all he knows, in the interests of justice.”
However, this confession of Aunt Emma’s rendered one thing more certain to me than ever before. I was sure I was on the right track now, after Courtenay Ivor. The bicycle clinched the proof.
But I said nothing as yet to the police, or to my friendly Inspector. I was determined to hunt the whole thing up on my own account first, and then deliver my criminal, when fully secured, to the laws of my country.
Not that I was vindictive. Not that I wanted to punish the man. No; I shrank terribly from the task. But to relieve myself from this persistent sense of surrounding mystery, and to free others from suspicion, I felt compelled to discover him. It seemed to me like a duty laid upon me from without. I dared not shirk it.
On the way out to Quebec, the sea seemed to revive strange memories. I had never crossed it before, except long, long ago, on my way home from Australia. And now that I sat on deck, in a wicker-chair, and looked at the deep dark waves by myself, I began once more, in vague snatches, to recall that earlier voyage. It came back to me all of itself. And that was quite in keeping with my previous recollections. My past life, I felt sure, was unfolding itself slowly to me in regular succession, from childhood onward.
Sitting there on the quarter-deck, gazing hard at the waves, I remembered how I had played on a similar ship years and years before, a little girl in short frocks, with my mamma in a long folding-chair beside me. I could see my mamma, with a sort of frightened smile on her poor pale face; and she looked so unhappy. My papa was there too, somewhat older and greyer—very unlike the papa of my first Australian picture. His face was so much hairier. Mamma cried a good deal at times, and papa tried to comfort her. Besides, what struck me most, there was no more baby. I wasn’t even allowed to speak about baby. That subject was tabooed—perhaps because it always made mamma cry so much, and press me hard to her bosom. At any rate, I remembered how once I spoke of baby to some fellow-passenger in the saloon, and papa was very angry, and caught me up in his arms and took me down to my berth; and there I had to stop all day by myself (though it was rolling hard) and could have no fruit for dinner, because I’d been naughty. I was strictly enjoined never to mention baby to anyone again, either then or at any time. I was to forget all about her.
Day after day, as we sailed on, reminiscences of the same sort crowded thicker and thicker upon me. Never reminiscences of my later life, but always early scenes brought up by distinct suggestion of that Australian voyage. When we passed a ship, it burst upon me how we’d passed such ships before: when there was fire-drill on deck, I remembered having assisted years earlier at just such fire-drill. The whole past came back like a dream, so that I could reconstruct now the first five or six years of my life almost entirely. And yet, even so there was a gap, a puzzle, a difficulty somehow. I couldn’t make the chronology of this slow-returning memory fit in as it ought with the chronology of the facts given to me by Aunt Emma and the Moores of Torquay. There was a constant discrepancy. It seemed to me that I must be a year or two older at least than they made me out. I remembered the voyage home far too well for my age. I fancied I went back further in my Australian recollections than would be possible from the dates Aunt Emma assigned me.
Slowly, as I compared these mental pictures of my first childhood one with the other, a strange fact seemed to loom forth, incomprehensible, incredible. When first it struck me, all unnerved as I was, my reason staggered before it. But it was true, none the less: quite true, I felt certain. Had I had two papas, then?—for the pictures differed so. Was one, clean-shaven, trim, and in a linen coat, the same as the other, older, graver, and sterner, with much hair on his face, and a rough sort of look, whom I saw more persistently in my later childish memories? I could hardly believe it. One man couldn’t alter so greatly in a few short years. Yet I thought of them both alike quite unquestioningly as papa: I thought of them too, I fancied, in a dim sort of way, as one and the same person.
These fresh mysteries occupied my mind for the greater part of that uneventful voyage. To throw them off, I laughed and talked as much as possible with the rest of the passengers. Indeed, I gained the reputation of being “an awfully jolly girl,” so heartily did I throw myself into all the games and amusements, to escape from the burden of my pressing thoughts: and I believe many old ladies on board were thoroughly scandalised that a woman whose father had been brutally murdered should ever be able to seem so bright and lively again. How little they knew! And what a world of mystery seemed to oppress and surround me!
At last, early one morning, we reached the Gulf, and took in our pilot off the Straits of Belleisle. I was on deck at the time, playing a game called “Shovelboard.” As the pilot reached the ship, he took the captain’s hand, and, to my immense surprise, said in an audible voice:
“So you’ve the famous Miss Callingham for a passenger, I hear, this voyage. There’s the latest Quebec papers. You’ll see you’re looked for. Our people are expecting her.”
I rushed forward, fiery hot, and with a trembling hand took one of the papers he was distributing all round, right and left, to the people on deck. It was unendurable that the memory of that one event should thus dog me through life with such ubiquitous persistence. I tore open the sheet. There, with horrified eyes, I read this hateful paragraph, in the atrociously vulgar style of Transatlantic journalism:
“The Sarmatian, expected off Belleisle to-morrow morning, brings among her passengers, as we learn by telegram, the famous Una Callingham, whose connection with the so-called Woodbury Mystery is now a matter of historical interest. The mysterious two-souled lady possesses, at present, all her faculties intact, as before the murder, and is indeed, people say, a remarkably spry and intelligent young person; but she has most conveniently forgotten all the events of her past life, and more particularly the circumstances of her father’s death, which is commonly conjectured to have been due to the pistol of some unknown lover. Such freaks of memory are common, we all know, in the matter of small debts and of newspaper subscriptions, but they seldom extend quite so far as the violent death of a near relation. However, Una knows her own business best. The Sarmatian is due alongside the Bonsecours Quay at 10 a.m. on Wednesday, the 10th; and all Quebec will, no doubt, be assembled at the landing-stage to say ‘Good-morning’ to the two-souled lady.”
The paper dropped from my hand. This was too horrible for anything! How I was ever to go through the ordeal of the landing at Quebec after that, I hadn’t the faintest conception. And was I to be dogged and annoyed like this through all my Canadian trip by anonymous scribblers? Had these people no hearts? no consideration for the sensitiveness of an English lady?
I looked over the side of the ship at the dark-blue water. Oh, how I longed to plunge into it and be released for ever from this abiding nightmare!
The moment we reached the quay at Quebec, some two days later, a dozen young men, with little notebooks in their hands, jumped on board all at once.
“Miss Callingham!” they cried with one accord, making a dash for the quarter-deck. “Which is she? Oh, this!—If you please, Miss Callingham, I should like to have ten minutes of your time to interview you!”
I clapped my hands to my ears, and stood back, all horrified. What I should have done, I don’t know, but for a very kind man in a big rough overcoat, who had jumped on board at the same time, and made over to me like the reporters. He stepped up to me at once, pushed aside the young men, and said in a most friendly tone:
“Miss Callingham, I think? You’d better come with me, then. These people are all sharks. Everybody in Quebec’s agog to see the Two-souled Lady. Answer no questions at all. Take not the least notice of them. Just follow me to the Custom House. Let them rave, but don’t speak to them.”
“Who are you?” I asked blindly, clinging to his arm in my terror.
“I’m a policeman in plain clothes,” my new friend answered; “and I’ve been specially detailed by order for this duty. I’m here to look after you. You’ve friends in Canada, though you may have quite forgotten them. They’ve sent me to help you. Those are two of my chums there, standing aside by the gangway. We’ll walk you off between us. Don’t be afraid.—Here, you sir, there; make way!—No one shall come near you.”
I was so nervous, and so ashamed that I accepted my strange escort without inquiry or remonstrance. He helped me, with remarkable politeness for a common policeman, across to the Custom House, where I sat waiting for my luggage. Reporters and sightseers, meanwhile, pressed obtrusively around me. My protector held them back. I was half wild with embarrassment. I’m naturally a reserved and somewhat sensitive girl, and this American publicity made me crimson with bashfulness.
As I sat there waiting, however, the two other policemen to whom my champion had beckoned sat one on each side of me, keeping off the idle crowd, while my first friend looked after the luggage and saw it safely through the Customs for me. He must be an Inspector, I fancied, or some other superior officer, the officials were so deferential to him. I gave him my keys, and he looked after everything himself. I had nothing, for my part, to do but to sit and wait patiently for him.
As soon as he had finished, he called a porter to his side.
“Vite!” he cried, in a tone of authority, to the man. “Un fiacre!”
And the porter called one.
I started to find that I knew what he meant. Till that moment, in my Second State, I had learned no French, and didn’t know I could speak any. But I recognised the words quite well as soon as he uttered them. My lost knowledge reasserted itself.
They bundled on my boxes. The crowd still stood around and gaped at me, open-mouthed. I got into the cab, more dead than alive.
“Allez!” my policeman cried to the French-Canadian driver, seating himself by my side.
“A la gare du chemin de fer Pacific! Aussi vite que possible!”
I understood every word. This was wonderful. My memory was coming back again.
The man tore along the streets to the Pacific railway station. By the time we reached it we had distanced the sightseers, though some of them gave chase. My policeman got out.
“The train’s just going!” he said sharply. “Don’t take a ticket for Palmyra, if you don’t want to be followed and tracked out all the way. They’ll telegraph on your destination. Book to Kingston instead, and then change at Sharbot Lake, and take a second ticket on from there to Palmyra.”
I listened, half dazed. Palmyra was the place where Dr. Ivor lived. Yet, even in the hurry of the moment, I wondered much to myself how the policeman knew I wanted to go to Palmyra.
There was no time to ask questions, however, or to deliberate on my plans. I took my ticket as desired, in a turmoil of feelings, and jumped on to the train. I trusted by this time I had eluded detection. I ought to have come, I saw now, under a feigned name. This horrid publicity was more than I could endure. My policeman helped me in with his persistent politeness, and saw my boxes checked as far as Sharbot Lake for me. Then he handed me the checks.
“Go in the Pullman,” he said quietly. “It’s a long journey, you know: four-and-twenty hours. You’ve only just caught it. But if you’d stopped in Quebec, you’d never have been able to give the sightseers the slip. You’d have been pestered all through. I think you’re safe now. It was this or nothing.”
“Oh, thank you so much!” I cried, with heartfelt gratitude, leaning out of the window as the train was on the point of starting. I pulled out my purse, and drew timidly forth a sovereign. “I’ve only English money,” I said, hesitating, for I didn’t know whether he’d be offended or not at the offer of a tip—he seemed such a perfect gentleman. “But if that’s any use to you—”
He smiled a broad smile and shook his head, much amused.
“Oh, thank you,” he said, half laughing, with a very curious air. “I’m a policeman, as I told you. But I don’t need tips. I’m the Chief Constable of Quebec—there’s my card; Major Tascherel,—and I’m glad to be of use, I’m sure, to any friend of Dr. Ivor’s.”
He lifted his hat with the inborn grace of a high-born gentleman. I coloured and bowed. The train steamed out of the station. As it went, I fell back, half fainting, in the comfortable armchair of the Pullman car, hardly able to speak with surprise and horror. It was all so strange, so puzzling, so bewildering! Then I owed my escape from the stenographic myrmidons of the Canadian Press to the polite care and attention of my father’s murderer!
Major Tascherel was a friend, he said, of Dr. Ivor’s!
Then Dr. Ivor knew I had come. He knew I was going to Palmyra to find him. And yet he had written to Quebec, apparently, expecting this crush, and asking his friend the Chief Constable to protect and befriend me. Had he murdered my father, and was he in love with me still? Did he think I’d come out, not to track him down, but to look for him? Strange, horrible questions! My heart stood still within me at this extraordinary revelation. Yet I was so frightened at the moment, alone in a strange land, that I felt almost grateful to the murderer himself for his kindness in thinking of me and providing for my reception.
As I settled in my seat and had time to realise what these things meant, it dawned upon me by degrees that all this was less remarkable, after all, than I first thought it. For they had telegraphed from England that I sailed on the Sarmatian; and Dr. Ivor, like everybody else, must have read the telegram. He might naturally conclude I would be half-mobbed by reporters; and as it was clear he had once been fond of me—hateful as I felt it even to admit the fact to myself—he might really have desired to save me annoyance and trouble. It was degrading, to be sure, even to think I owed anything of any sort to such a wretch as that murderer; yet in a certain corner of my heart I couldn’t help being thankful to him. But how strange to feel I had come there on purpose to hunt him down! How horrible that I must so repay good with evil!
Then a still more ghastly thought surged up suddenly in my mind. Why on earth did he think I was going to Palmyra? Was it possible he fancied I loved him still—that I wanted to marry him? Could he imagine I’d come out just to fling myself at his feet and ask him to take me? Could he suppose I’d forgotten all the rest of my past life, and his vile act as well, and yet remembered alone what little love, if any, I ever had borne him? It was incredible that any man, however wicked, however conceited, should think such folly as that—that a girl would marry her father’s murderer; and yet what might not one expect from a man who, after having shot my father, had still the inconceivable and unbelievable audacity to take deliberate steps for securing my own comfort and happiness? From such a wretch as that, one might look for almost anything!
For ten minutes or more, as we whirled along the line in the Pullman car, I was too dazed and confused to notice anything around me. My brain swam vaguely, filled full with wild whirling thoughts; the strange drama of my life, always teeming with mysteries, seemed to culminate in this reception in an unknown land by people who appeared almost to know more about my business than I myself did. I gazed out of the window blankly. In some vague dim way I saw we were passing between rocky hills, pine-clad and beautiful, with deep glimpses now and then into the riven gorge of a noble river. But I didn’t even realise to myself that these were Canadian hills—those were the heights of Abraham—that was the silver St. Lawrence. It all passed by like a living dream. I sat still in my chair, as one stunned and faint; I gazed out, more dead than alive, on the unfamiliar scene that unrolled itself in exquisite panorama before me. Quebec and the Laurentian hills were to me half unreal: the inner senses alone were awake and conscious.
Presently a gentle voice at my side broke, not at all unpleasantly, the current of my reflections. It was a lady’s voice, very sweet and musical.
“I’m afraid,” it said kindly, with an air of tender solicitude, “you only just caught the train, and were hurried and worried and flurried at the last at the station. You look so white and tired. How your breath comes and goes! And I think you’re new to our Canadian ways. I saw you didn’t understand about the checks for the baggage. Let me take away this bag and put it up in the rack for you. Here’s a footstool for your feet; that’ll make you more comfortable.”
At the first sound of her sweet voice, I turned to look at the speaker. She was a girl, perhaps a year or two younger than myself, very slender and graceful, and with eyes like a mother’s. She wasn’t exactly pretty, but her face was so full of intelligence and expression that it was worth a great deal more than any doll-like prettiness.
Perhaps it was pleasure at being spoken to kindly at all in this land of strangers; perhaps it was revulsion from the agony of shame and modesty I had endured at Quebec; but, at any rate, I felt drawn at first sight to my sweet-voiced fellow-traveller. Besides, she reminded me somewhat of Minnie Moore, and that resemblance alone was enough to attract me. I looked up at her gratefully.
“Oh, thank you so much!” I cried, putting my bag in her hand. “I’ve only just come out from England; and I’d hardly time at Quebec to catch the train; and the people crowded around so, that I was flustered at landing; and everything somehow seems to be going against me.”
And with that my poor overwrought nerves gave way all at once, and without any more ado I just burst out crying.
The lady by my side leant over me tenderly.
“There—cry, dear,” she said, as if she’d known me for years, stooping down and almost caressing me. “Jack,”—and she turned to a tall gentleman at her side,—“quick! you’ve got my black bag; get me out the sal volatile. She’s quite faint, poor thing; we must look after her instantly.”
The person to whom she spoke, and who was apparently her husband or her brother, took down the black bag from the rack hastily, and got out the sal volatile, as my friend directed him. He poured a little into a tumbler and held it quietly to my lips. I liked his manner, as I’d liked the lady’s. He was so very brotherly. Besides, there was something extremely soothing about his quick, noiseless way. He did it all so fast, yet without the faintest sign of agitation. I couldn’t help thinking what a good nurse he would make; he was so rapid and effective, yet so gentle and so quiet. He seemed perfectly accustomed to the ways of nervous women.
I dried my eyes after a while, and looked up in his face. He was very good-looking, and had a charming soft smile. How lucky I should have tumbled upon such pleasant travelling companions! In my present mental state, I had need of sympathy. And, indeed, they took as much care of me, and coddled me up as tenderly, as if they’d known me for years. I was almost tempted to make a clean breast of my personality to them, and tell them why it was I had been so worried and upset by my reception at Quebec: but I shrank from confessing it. I hated my own name, almost, it seemed to bring me such very unpleasant notoriety.
In a very few minutes, I felt quite at home with my new friends. I explained to them that when I landed I had no intention of going on West by train at once, but that news which I received on the way had compelled me to push forward by the very first chance; and that I had to change my ticket at a place called Sharbot Lake, whose very position or distance I hadn’t had time to discover. The lady smiled sweetly, and calmed my fears by telling me we wouldn’t reach Sharbot Lake till mid-day to-morrow, and that I would have plenty of time there to book on to my destination.
Thus encouraged, I went on to tell them I had no Canadian money, having brought out what I needed for travelling expenses and hotels in Bank of England 20 pound notes. The lady smiled again, and said in the friendliest way:
“Oh, my brother’ll get them changed for you at Montreal as we pass, won’t you, Jack? or at least as much as you need till you get to”—she checked herself—“the end of your journey.”
I noticed how she pulled herself up, though at the moment I attached no particular importance to it.
So he was her brother, not her husband, then! Well, he was a very nice fellow, either way, and nobody could be kinder or more sympathetic than he’d been to me so far.
We fell into conversation, which soon by degrees grew quite intimate.
“How far West are you going?” the man she called Jack asked after a little time, tentatively.
And I answered, all unsuspiciously:
“To a place called Palmyra.”
“Why, we live not far from Palmyra,” the sister replied, with a smile. “We’re going that way now. Our station’s Adolphus Town, the very next village.”
I hadn’t yet learned to join the wisdom of the serpent to the innocence of the dove, I’m afraid. Remember, though in some ways I was a woman full grown, in others I was little more than a four-year-old baby.
“Do you know a Dr. Ivor there?” I asked eagerly, leaning forward.
“Oh, yes, quite well,” the lady answered, arranging my footstool more comfortably as she spoke. “He’s got a farm out there now, and hardly practises at all. How queer it is! One always finds one knows people in common. Is Dr. Ivor a friend of yours?”
I recoiled at the stray question almost as if I’d been shot.
“Oh, no!” I cried, horrified at the bare idea of such treason. “He’s anything but a friend... I—I only wanted to know about him.”
The lady looked at Jack, and Jack looked at the lady. Were they telegraphing signs? I fancied somehow they gave one another very meaning glances. Jack was the first to speak, breaking an awkward silence.
“You can’t expect everyone to know your own friends, or to like them either, Elsie,” he said slowly, with his eyes fixed hard on her, as if he expected her to flare up.
My heart misgave me. A hateful idea arose in it. Could my sweet travelling companion be engaged—to my father’s murderer?
“But he’s a dear good fellow, for all that, Jack,” Elsie said stoutly; and strange as it sounds to say so, I admired her for sticking up for her friend Dr. Ivor, if she really liked him. “I won’t hear him run down by anybody, not even by YOU. If this lady knew him better, I’m sure she’d like him, as we all do.”
Jack turned the conversation abruptly.
“But if you’re going to Palmyra,” he asked, “where do you mean to stop? Have you thought about lodgings? You mustn’t imagine it’s a place like an English town, with an inn or hotel or good private apartments. There’s nowhere you can put up at in these brand-new villages. Are you going to friends, or did you expect to find quarters as easily as in England?”
This was a difficulty which, indeed, had never even occurred to me till that moment. I stammered and hesitated.
“Well,” I said slowly, “to tell you the truth, I haven’t thought about that. The landing at Quebec was such a dreadful surprise to me, and”—tears came into my eyes again—“I had a great shock there—and I had to come on so quick, I didn’t ask about anything but catching the train. I meant to stop a night or two either at Quebec or in Montreal, and to make all inquiries: but circumstances, you see, have prevented that. So I really don’t know what I’d better do when I get to Palmyra.”
“I do,” my new friend answered quickly, her soft sweet voice having quite a decisive ring in it. “You’d better not go on to Palmyra at all. There’s no sort of accommodation there, except a horrid drinking-saloon. You’d better stop short at Adolphus Town and spend the night with us; and then you can look about you next day, if you like, and see what chance there may be of finding decent quarters. Old Mrs. Wilkins might take her in, Jack, or the Blacks at the tannery.”
I smiled, and felt touched.
“Oh, how good of you!” I cried. “But I really couldn’t think of it. Thank you ever so much, though, for your kind thought, all the same. It’s so good and sweet of you. But you don’t even know who I am. I have no introduction.”
“You’re your own best introduction,” Elsie said, with a pretty nod: I thought of her somehow from the very first moment I heard her name as Elsie. “And as to your not knowing us, never mind about that. We know YOU at first sight. It’s the Canadian way to entertain Angels unawares. Out here, you know, hospitality’s the rule of the country.”
Well, I demurred for a long time; I fought off their invitation as well as I could: I couldn’t bear thus to quarter myself upon utter strangers. But they both were so pressing, and brought up so many cogent arguments why I couldn’t go alone to the one village saloon—a mere whisky-drinking public-house, they said, of very bad character,—that in the long run I was fain almost to acquiesce in their kind plan for my temporary housing. Besides, after my horrid experience at Quebec, it was such a positive relief to me to meet anybody nice and delicate, that I couldn’t find it in my heart to refuse these dear people. And then, perhaps it was best not to go quite on to Palmyra at once, for fear of unexpectedly running against my father’s murderer. If I met him in the street, and he recognised me and spoke to me, what on earth could I do? My head was all in a whirl, indeed, as to what he might intend or expect: for I felt sure he expected me. I made one last despairing effort.
“If I stop at your house, though,” I said, half ashamed of myself for venturing to make conditions, “there’s one promise you must make me—that I sha’n’t see Dr. Ivor unless you let me know and get my consent beforehand.”
Jack, as I called him to myself, answered gaily back with a rather curious smile:
“If you like, you need see nobody but our own two selves. We’ll promise not to introduce anybody to you without due leave, and to let you do as you like in that and in everything.”
So I yielded at last.
“Well, I must know your name,” I said tentatively.
And Jack, looking queerly at me with an inquiring air, said:
“My sister’s name’s Elsie; mine’s John Cheriton.”
“And yours?” Elsie asked, glancing timidly down at me.
My heart beat hard. I was face to face with a dilemma. These were friends of Courtenay Ivor’s, and I had given myself away to them. I was going to their house, to accept their hospitality—and to betray their friend! Never in my life did I feel so guilty before. Oh! what on earth was I to do? I had told them too much; I had gone to work foolishly. If I said my real name, I should let out my whole secret. I must brazen it out now. With tremulous lips and flushed cheek, I answered quickly, “Julia Marsden.”
Elsie drew back, all abashed. In a moment her cheek grew still redder, I felt sure, than my own.
“Oh, Marsden!” she cried, eyeing me close. “Why, I thought you were Miss Callingham!”
“How on earth did you know that?” I exclaimed, terrified almost out of my life. Was I never for one moment to escape my own personality?
“Why, they put it in the papers that you were coming,” Elsie answered, looking tenderly at me, more in sympathy than in anger. “And it’s written on your bag, you know, that Jack put up in the rack there... That’s why we were so sorry for you, and so grieved at the way you must have been hustled on the quay. And that’s also why we wanted you to come to us... But don’t be a bit afraid. We quite understand you want to travel incognita. After the sort of reception you got at Quebec, no wonder you’re afraid of these hateful sightseers!... Very well, dear,” she took my hand with the air of an old friend, “your disguise shall be respected while you stop at our house. Miss Marsden let it be. You can make any inquiries you like about Dr. Ivor. We will be secrecy itself. We’ll say nothing to anyone. And my brother’ll take your ticket at Sharbot Lake for Adolphus Town.”
I broke down once more. I fairly cried at such kindness.
“Oh, how good you are!” I said. “How very, very good. This is more than one could ever have expected from strangers.”
She held my hand and stroked it.
“We’re not strangers,” she answered. “We’re English ourselves. We sympathise deeply with you in this new, strange country. You must treat us exactly like a brother and sister. We liked you at first sight, and we’re sure we’ll get on with you.”
I lifted her hand to my lips and kissed it.
“And I liked you also,” I said, “and your brother, too. You’re both so good and kind. How can I ever sufficiently thank you?”