Josiah's "idee" of "them ladies."Josiah's "idee" of "them ladies."
Them remarks of hisen wuz wrung out of him by the glory of the display, as the sweet sap is brung out of the maple trees by the all-powerful influence and glory of the spring sun, and they show more plain than song or poem of the wonders about us.
Josiah don't love to praise wimmen—he hates to. But I answered him proudly, "Yes, this Magic Wonder Land o' beauty and practical use wuz wrought by Sophia Haydon, and other noble wimmen. They must have the credit for everything about it, and for all the work it shows off within its borders."
Sez I, "Uncle Sam was a good-actin' creeter for once, anyway, when he made that act of Congress about the World's Columbian Exposition. He made that body of men appoint a board of Lady Managers—two ladies from each State and Territory, and eight lady managers at large, and nine at Chicago."
That name "Lady Manager" wuz done by Uncle Sam's over-politeness to the sect, and I don't know as Josiah wuz to blame. You would think by the name that them ladies wuz a-settin' in rows of gilded chairs, a-holdin' a rosy in their hands.
But, in fact, amongst them female managers there wuz one hard-workin' doctor and lawyer, real-estate agents, journalists, editors, merchants, two cotton planters, teachers, artists, farmers, and a cattle queen.
And you'd think to hear it talked on that there wuz only eight ladies at large amongst 'em—that the rest on 'em wuz kinder shet up and hampered. But you'd git that idee out of your head after one look in that Woman's Buildin'. You'd think that not only the hull board of Lady Managers wuz at large, but that every female woman the hull length and breadth of our country not only wuz at large, but the wimmen of the hull world. Why, connected with this great work is not only the hull caboodle of our own wimmen, fur or near—American wimmen, every one on 'em a queen, or will be when she gits her rights; besides them wimmen, the Queen of England's daughter, the Princess Christian, is at the head of the British wimmen at the Fair.
And Queen Victoria herself has sent over some things, amongst 'em them napkins of hern, spun and wove by her own hands.
What a lesson for snobbish young ladies, who would think it lowerin' to hem a napkin! What would they think to tackle 'em in the flax? And then there wuz a hat made by England's Queen, and gin to her grand-daughter; and there wuz six pictures painted by her, original sketches from nater. One view wuz from the Queen's own room at Balmoral.
And then the Princess of Wales sent a chair of carved walnut, upholstered with leather, all the work of her own hands.
What another lesson that is to our lazy, fashionable girls! And Princess Maud of Wales sent a embroidered piano stool. And Princess Louise—Miss Lorne that now is—and Princess Beatrice sent the work of their own brains and hands.
I guess queens have always made a practice of workin'.
Why, I see there—and I could have wept when I seen it if I'd had the time—an elegant bedquilt made by poor Mary Queen of Scots. She sot the last stitches in it the day before her death.
What queer stitches them must have been—Agony and Remorse a-twistin' the thread in the needle.
Queen Victoria sent over some things.Queen Victoria sent over some things.
And then there wuz a piece of embroidery by Queen Marie Antoinette. What queer stitchesthemmust have been, if she could have seen the End!
And then there wuz a portrait of Maria de Medici, Queen of France, made by herself.
And then there wuz a Bible presented by Queen Anne to the Moravian Church of New York, and a Bible of Princess Christian's.
The fine needlework of the wimmen of Greece makes a splendid show. The Queen of Greece is at the head of their commission.
The Queen of Italy goes ahead of all the other monarchs; she shows her own private collection of lace handkerchiefs, and neckties, and mantillys, and so forth. And even her crown laces—them beautiful laces that droop down over her regal head-dresswhen she sets with her crown on, and her sceptre held out in her hand.
The Queen of Belgium is at the head of their exposition. And the German commission is headed by a Princess.
Wall, you see from what I have said that there wuz a great variety of Queens a-showin' off in that buildin'; and as for Baronnesses, and Duchesses, and Ladies, etc., etc.—why, they wuz as common there as clover in a field of timothy. You felt real familiar with 'em.
The reception-room of Mrs. Palmer, the beautiful President of the Woman's Committee, is a fittin' room for the presidin' genius.
All along the walls below the ceilin' runs a design of roses, scattered and grouped with exquisite taste. Miss Agnes Pitman, of Cincinnati, decorated that room.
In Mrs. Palmer's office is a wonderful table donated by the wimmen of Pennsylvania.
In that table is cedar from Lebanon, oak from the yoke of Liberty Bell, oak from the good old ship Constitution, from Washington's headquarters at Valley Forge, and wood from other noted places.
And none of the woods wuz ever put to better use than now, to hold the records of woman's Aspirations and Success in 1893.
The ceilin' of the New York room wuz designed by Dora Keith Wheeler, and is beautiful and effective. And the room is full of objects of beauty and use.
The gorgeous President's chair from Mexico is a sight; and so to me wuz the chair in the Kentucky room, three hundred years old, that used to be sot in by old Elder Brewster, of Plymouth.
Good old creeter! if he could have been moved offen that rock of hisen three hundred years ago, into this White City, he would have fell out of that chair in a fit—I most know he would.
And then there wuz a silk flag made by General Sheridan's mother when she wuz eighty years old, and a group of dolls dressed in costooms illustrating American history.
And there wuz a shirt of old Peter Stuyvesent's and a baby dress of De Witt Clinton's.
I never mistrusted that he wuz ever a baby till I seen that dress. I'd always thought on him as the first Governor of New York.
And speakin' of babys—why, I wuz jest a-lookin' at that dress when I met Miss Job Presley, of Loontown.
And I sez, almost the first thing, "Where is your baby?"
And she sez, "It is in the Babys' Buildin'. I have got a check for her—one for her, and one for my umbrell." And she showed 'em to me.
"Wall," sez I, "that is a good, noble idee to rest mothers' tired arms; but it must make you feel queer."
And she said, as she put the checks back into her portmoney, "That it did make her feel queer as a dog."
Miss Job Presley.Miss Job Presley.
Wall, there wuz a table from Pennsylvania, containin' more than two thousand pieces of native wood; and there wuz a Scotchwoman with her good old spinnin'-wheel, and a Welsh girl a-weavin' cloth.
And inventions of females of all kinds, from a toboggan slide, and a system of irrigation, and models of buildin's of all kinds, to a stock car.
Why, the very elevator you rode up to the ruff garden on wuz made by a woman.
And then there wuz cotton raised and ginned by wimmen of the South, and nets by the wimmen of New Jersey, and fruit raised by the wimmen of California—the most beautiful fruit I ever sot my eyes on, and wine made by her, too.
(I could have wept when I see that, but presoom it wuz for sickness.)
And from Colorado there wuz tracin's of minin' surveys. Wimmen a-findin' out things hid in the bowels of the earth! O good land! the idee on't!
And engravin's and etchin's done by wimmen way back to 1581.
And in stamped leather, wall decoration, furniture, it wuz a sight to see the noble doin's of my sect; and a exhibit that done my soul good wuz from Belva Lockwood, admittin' wimmen to practise in the Supreme Court. That wuz better than leather work, though that is worthy, and wuz more elevatin' to my sect than the elevator.
The British exhibit is arranged splendidly to show off wimmen's noble work in charity, education, manafacture, art, literature, etc., and amongst their patents is one for a fire-escape, and one to extract gold from base metals. Both of these are good idees, as there can't anybody dispute.
Another exhibit there that appeals strong to the feelin' heart wuz Kate Marsdon's Siberian leper village.
She is a nurse of the Red Cross, and her heart ached with pity for them wretchedlepers, in their dretful lonely huts in the forests of Siberia.
She went herself to see their awful condition, and tried to help 'em; she raised money herself for horsepitals and nurses.
Relics of Kate Marsdon.Relics of Kate Marsdon.
Here is a model of the village, with church, horsepital, schoolhouse, store, and cottages for them that are able to work.
Here is the saddle she wore durin' her long, dretful journey to Siberia, and the knife she carried, and some of the miserable, hard black bread she had to eat.
Here are letters to her from Queen Victoria, and the Empress of Russia.
But a Higher Power writ to her, writ on her heart, and went with her acrost the dark fields of snow and ice.
Wall, after lookin' at everything under the sun, from a Lion's Head, by Rosa Bonhuer, to a piece of bead-work by a Injun, and every queer and beautiful Japan thing you ever thought on, or ever didn't think on, and everything else under the sun, moon, and stars, that wuz ever made by a woman—and there is no end to 'em—we went up into the ruff garden, where, amidst flowers, and fountains, and fresh air, happy children wuz a-playin', with birds and butterflies a-flyin' about 'em over their heads.
The birds couldn't git out, nor the children either, for up fifteen feet high a wire screen wuz stretched along, coverin' the hull beautiful garden. Nothin' could git in or out of it but the sweet air and the sunshine.
Oh, what a good idee! You could see that the Woman's Buildin' wuz full of beautiful, practical idees, from the ground floor to the very top; as you could see plain by this that the children wuz thought on and cared for, from the bottom to the top of this palace. Some say that wimmen soarin' out in art and business makes 'em hard and ontender; you can see that this is a plain falsehood jest by walkin' once through the Woman's Buildin'.
If ever wimmen soared out in art and business, and genius, and philanthropy, and education, and religion, she does here; and from the floor to the ruff is the highest signs of her tenderness for the children, and all weak and helpless ones.
Oh, what emotions I had in that buildin', and of what a immense size! Some of the time I got lost and by the side of myself, a-thinkin' such deep and high thoughts about the World's Fair, and wimmen, etc., and they wuz so fur-reachin', too; it wuz a sight.
For I knew on that openin' day, when the hammer struck that marvellous golden nail, and this world of treasures opened at the signal—I knew that the echo of that blow wuzn't a-goin' to die out on Lake Michigan. I knew that at its echo old Prejudice, and Custom, and Might wuz a-goin' to skulk back and hide their hoary heads; and Young Progress, and Equality, and Right wuz a-goin' to advance and take their places.
Stiflin', encumberin' veils wuz a-goin' to fall from the sad eyes of the wimmen of the East. Chains wuz a-goin' to fall from the delicate wrists of the wimmen of the West.
I hailed that sound as helpin' forward the era of Love, Peace, goodwill to men and wimmen.
Yes, it wuz a happy hour for her who was once Smith, when man, in the shape of President Cleveland, pressed the button with his thumb. And woman, in the form of Bertha Honore Palmer, drove that nail home with a hammer.
Josiah thought it ort to been the other way. He sez, "That men wuz so used to hammer and nails;" and he sez, and stuck to it, that, "No woman livin' ever druv a nail home without splittin' her own nail in the effort, and bendin' the nail she driv sideways."
But I sot him down in my mind as representin' Old Prejudice, and I did not dain a reply to him. Only I merely said—
"Wall, she did drive the nail in straight, and she clinched it solid with the golden words of her address."
Yes, Mrs. Palmer has stood up on a high mount durin' the hard years past since the Fair wuz thought on.
She has stood up so high that she could see things hid from them on the ground.
She could see over the hull world, and could see that, like little children of one family, the nations wuz all havin' their own separate work to do to help their Pa's and Ma's—their Pa Progress, and Grandpa Civilization, and their Ma and Grandma Love and Humanity.
She could see that some of the children wuz dark complexioned, and some lighter, and some kinder yeller favored, and some wuz big, and some wuz small.
They differed in looks and behavior, as every big family will, and she could see that they had their little squabbles together, a-quarrelin' among themselves over their possessions, their toys and their rights—they wuz jealous of each other, and greedy, as children will be; and they had their perplexities, and their deep troubles, and their vexations, as children must have in this world, and some wuz fractious, and some wuz balky, and some wuz good dispositioned, and some wuz cross and mean, and had to be spanked more or less.
But she could see from her sightly place that the hull of the children wuz a-movin' on, some slower and some faster, movin' on, and a-gittin' into line, and a-fallin' into step, to the music of the future.
She could see, and she has seen from the first minute she wuz lifted up and looked off over the world, that this gatherin' of all the children together, a-showin' the best they had done, or could do, wuz a-goin' to help the hull family along more than tongue could tell, or mind could conceive of.
She could see that it wuz encouragin' the good children to do still better. Allowin' the smart ones to show off their smartness to the best advantage. Awakenin' a spirit of helpful emulation in the more backward and sluggish of 'em.
Yes, the light from this big house-warmin' she knew would penetrate and glow into the darkest corners of the earth, and, like a great warm sun, bring forth a glowin' and never-endin' harvest of blessed results.
The hull family wuz a-doin' first rate, and their Pa and Ma wuz proud enough of 'em.
And they felt well, for they knew that they wuz advancin' rapid, and with quick steps and with happy hearts.
And when she looked way back, and watched the long procession a-defilin' along, some a-walkin' swift and some a-laggin' back with slower, more burdened footsteps (chains of different kinds a-draggin' on 'em)—
When she see the dark shadders of the past behind 'em—the dretful shapes of ignorance and evil a-lurkin' in the heavy blackness from which they wuz emergin'—her tender heart ached with sympathy.
But when she looked fur off, fur off, ahead on 'em the gole that they wuz a-settin' out for, she had to almost lift her hands and hide her eyes from the dazzlin' glory.
It most blinded her, so bright it wuz, and so golden the rays streamed out.
Equal rights, Freedom for all, Love, Peace, Joy. I spoze she see a sight.
Her face shone!
But to resoom: Josiah wuz dretful interested in the Agricultural display of the ladies of Iowa, and it wuz interestin' to look at.
On one end is panels of pansies all made out of kernels of corn, so nateral that you almost wanted to pick 'em off and make a posey of 'em.
On one of the other walls is a row of wimmen's heads done in corn; the hair is done in corn silks, and their clothes out of the husks.
And then there is a border made of corn, illustratin' the story of corn in Greek Mythology.
There is a picture called the Water Carrier—a woman made of different kinds of corn, jest as nateral as life, and the landscape round her made of grasses, and trees of sorghum, and the frame is made of ears of corn.
Josiah wuz crazy to have one to home. Sez he, "Samanthy, I am bound to have your picture took in corn, it is so cheap." Sez he, "Ury and I could do it some rainy day, and how you would treasure it!" sez he.
Sez he, "I could make your hair out of white silk grass, and your face out of red pop-corn mostly." Sez he, "Of course, to make you life size it would take a big crop of corn. I should judge," sez he, "that it would take about two bushels to make your waist ribbon; but I wouldn't begretch it."
Sez I, "If you want to make me happy in corn, Josiah Allen, take it to the mill and grind it into samp or good fine meal. You and Ury can't bring happiness to me by paintin' me in corn, so dismiss the thought to once, for I will not be took."
"Yes, break it up," sez he bitterly; "you always do, if I branch out into anything uneek."
It wuz some time before I could quiet him down.
The display by Norway and Sweden is very complete, showin' the work of the lower and upper classes, laces, and embroideries, etc., etc.
And so they wuz from every other nation of the Globe. It fairly makes my brain reel now, to think of the wonder and the glory of 'em.
Wall, towards the last we went to see the model kitchen. And Miss Plank, who had been off with some friends, jined us here, and she wuz happy here, as happy as a queen on her throne; and Josiah, and I thought he richly deserved it, in the restaurant attached, he eat such a lunch as only a hungry man can eat, cooked jest as good as vittles can be, and all done by wimmen. Why, Miss Rorer herself, that I have kep (in book form) on my buttery shelf for years, wuz here in the body, a-learnin' folks to cook. That is sayin' enough for the vittles to them that knows her (in book form).
There wuz every appliance and new-fangled invention to help wimmen cook, and do her work, and every old-fangled one. Miss Plank hunted hard to find sunthin' to make better pancakes than hern, but couldn't.
But it wuz a sight—a sight, the things we see there.
Wall, we spent the hull of the day here—never stepped our feet outside, and didn't want to, or at least I didn't.
And as Night softly onrolled her mantilly, previous to drawin' it over her face and goin' to sleep, we reluctantly turned our feet away from this beautiful, sacred place, and went home on the cars. And didn't the bed feel good? And didn't Sleep come like a sweet, consolin' friend and lay her hand on my gray hair and weary fore-top jest as lovin' as Mother Smith ust to, and murmur in my ear, jest assoft and low as Ma Smith did, "Hush, my dear; lie still and slumber."
Wall, the next mornin'—such is the wonderful balm of onbroken sleep that any one takes in onbeknown to themselves—we felt considerable brisk.
And Josiah proposed that we should go and pay attention to the Buildin' of Liberal Arts and Manafactures that day.
Havin' had my way the day before on goin' to the home and headquarters of my sect first, I thought it wuzn't no more than right that my pardner should have his way that day as to what buildin' we should pay attention to, and he wanted to go to the biggest one next.
He said that, "When he wuz a-shearin' sheep he always wanted to tackle the biggest one first, and he felt jest so about any hard job."
I kinder wanted to go to the Art Gallery that mornin'; first wimmen, and then Art—them wuz my choices. But Love prevailed. And the feelin' that, after seein' thedisplay that wimmen had wrought, that mebby it wuz best to go next to the largest house on the grounds, and the most liberal one.
So we sot off, after a good breakfast.
We thought we would meander kinder slow that mornin', and examine things closely. Truly we had been too much overcome by that first visit the day before to take much notice of things in particular.
When that seen had bust onto us it wuz some like a blind man comin' to his sight in the middle of a June day. He wouldn't pay any particular attention to each separate glory that made up the seen—blue sky, green fields, sunshine, white clouds, sparklin' waters, rustlin' trees, wavin' grass, roses, green fields, and so forth and so forth.
No, it would all mingle in one dazzlin' picture before his astounded eyeballs. So it had been with us, or with me, at any rate.
Now we laid out to go slower and take things in more separate—one by one, as it were; and we seemed to realize more than we had sensed it the immense—immense size of the depot, the rumble of the elevated trains overhead, and the abundance of the facilities to git into the Columbian World's Fair.
Why, there is about fifty places right there to git tickets, and ninety-six turnstiles—most a hundred! The idee!
Wall, with no casualities worth enumeratin', we found ourselves in that glorious Court of Honor, and pretty nigh that gorgeous fountain of MacMonnies. This matchless work of art occupies the place of honor amidst the incomparable group of wonders in that Court of Honor, and it deserves it. Yes, indeed! its size is immense, but it don't show it, owin' to the size of the buildin's surroundin' it.
Here in this fountain, as elsewhere at Columbus's doin's, female wimmen are put forward in the highest and loftiest places.
High up, enthroned in a mammoth boat, stately and beautiful in design, sets a impressive female figger, her face all lit up with Truth and Earnest Purpose as she towers up above the others. The boat seems to be a-goin' aginst the wind, as boats that amount to anything and git there always have in the past, and most likely will in the future. And the keen wind wuz a-blowin' hard aginst the female figger that wuz a-standin' up in front of the boat, but she didn't care; it blowed her drapery back some, but it only floated out her wings better.
She held a bugle in her hand, a-soundin' out, I should judge from her looks—
"How goes the world? I am comin' to help, but you needn't wait for me—I will overtake you!"
She wuz bound to help the old world along, as you could see by her looks.
I thought when I first looked at it that the hull thing wuz to show forth the powers of electricity. I thought that that wuz Electricity on top of that throne, and the woman in front wuz a-gazin' out fur ahead, a-tryin' to catch sight of that most wondrous New World that that strange Magician is a-goin' to sail us into. And I didn't wonder that she wuz a-gazin' so intent fur off ahead.
For we don't know no more about that strange, onknown world than Columbus did when he sot sail from Genoa.
A few strange birds have flown from it and lighted on the heads of the Discoverers, a few spars of wisdom has been washed ashore, and some strange leaves and sea-weeds, all tellin' us that they have come from a new world different from ours, and one more riz up like—more like the Immortal.
But of the hull world of wonder, it is yet to be discovered; and I thought, as I looked at it, I shouldn't wonder if they will get there—the figger onthe throne wuz so impressive, and the female in front so determined.
Wisdom, and courage, and joyful hope and ardor.
Helped by 'em, borne along by 'em in the face of envy, and detraction, and bigotry, and old custom, the boat sails grandly.
"Ho! up there on the high mast! What news?"
"Light! light ahead!"
But to resoom: a-standin' up on each side of that impressive figger wuz another row of females—mebby they had oars in their hands, showin' that they wuz calculatin' to take hold and row the boat for a spell if it got stuck; and mebby they wuz poles, or sunthin'.
But I don't believe they meant to use 'em on that solitary man that stood in back end of the boat, a-propellin' it—it would have been a shame if they had.
No; I believe that they meant to help at sunthin' or ruther with them long sticks.
They wuz all a-lookin' some distance ahead, all a-seemin' bound to get where they started for.
Besides bein' gorgeous in the extreme, I took it as bein' a compliment to my sect, the way that fountain wuz laid out—ten or a dozen wimmen, and only one or two men. But after I got it all fixed out in my mind what that lofty and impressive figger meant, a bystander a-standin' by explained it all out to me.
I took it as bein' a compliment to my sect the way that fountain wuz laid out.I took it as bein' a compliment to my sect the way that fountain wuz laid out--ten or a dozen wimmen and only one or two men.
He said that the female figger way up above the rest wuz Columbia, beautiful, strong, fearless.
And that it wuz Fame that stood at the prow with the bugle, and that it wuz Father Time at the hellum, a-guidin' it through the dangers of the centuries.
And the female figgers around Columbia's throne wuz meant for Science, Industry, Commerce, Agriculture, Music, Drama, Paintin', and Literature, all on 'em a-helpin' Columbia along in her grand pathway.
And then I see that what I had hearn wuz true, that Columbia had jest discovered Woman. Yes, the boat wuz headed directly towards Woman, who stood up one hundred feet high in front.
And I see plain that Columbia couldn't help discoverin' her if she wanted to, when she's lifted herself up so, and is showin' plain in 1893 jest how lofty and level-headed, how many-sided and yet how symmetrical she is.
There she stands (Columbia didn't have to take my word for it), there shewuz a-towerin' up one hundred feet, lofty, serene, and sweet-faced, her calm, tender eyes a-lookin' off into the new order of centuries.
And Columbia wuz a-sailin' right towards her, steered by Time, the invincible.
I see there wuz a great commotion down in the water, a-snortin', and a-plungin', and a-actin' amongst the lower order of intelligences.
But Columbia's eyes wuz clear, and calm, and determined, and Old Time couldn't be turned round by any prancin' from the powers below.
Woman is discovered.
But to resoom. This immense boat wuz in the centre, jest as it should be; and all before it and around wuz the horses of Neptune, and mermaids, and fishes, and all the mystery of the sea.
Some of the snortin' and prancin' of the horses of the Ocean, and pullin' at the bits, so's the men couldn't hardly hold 'em, wuz meant, I spoze, to represent how awful tuckerin' it is for humanity to control the forces of Nater.
Wall, of all the sights I ever see, that fountain wuz the upshot and cap sheaf; and how I would have loved to have told Mr. MacMonnies so! It would have been so encouragin' to him, and it would have seemed to have relievedthat big debt of gratitude that Jonesville and America owed to him; and how I wish I could make a good cup of tea for him, and brile a hen or a hen turkey! I'd do it with a willin' mind.
I wish he'd come to Jonesville and make a all-day's visit—stay to dinner and supper, and all night if he will, and travel round through Jonesville the next day. I would enjoy it, and so would Josiah. Of course, we couldn't show off in fireworks anything to what he does, havin' nothin' but a lantern and a torchlight left over from Cleveland's campain. No; we shouldn't try to have no such doin's. I know when I am outdone.
Bime-by we stood in front of that noble statute of the Republic.
And as I gazed clost at it, and took in all its noble and serene beauty, I had emotions of a bigger size, and more on 'em, than I had had in some time.
Havin' such feelin's as I have for our own native land—discovered by Christopher Columbus, founded by George Washington, rescued, defended, and saved by Lincoln and Grant (and I could preach hours and hours on each one of these noble male texts, if I had time)—
Bein' so proud of the Republic as I have always been, and so sot on wantin' her to do jest right and soar up above all the other nations of the earth in nobility and goodness—havin' such feelin's for her, and such deep and heartfelt love and pride for my own sect—what wuz my emotions, as I see that statute riz up to the Republic in the form of a woman, when I went up clost and paid particular attention to her!
A female, most sixty-five feet tall! Why, as I looked on her, my emotions riz me up so, and seemed to expand my own size so, that I felt as if I, too, towered up so high that I could lock arms with her, and walk off with her arm in arm, and look around and enjoy what wuz bein' done there in the great To-Day for her sect, and mine; and what that sect wuz a-branchin' out and doin' for herself.
But, good land! it wuz only my emotions that riz me up; my common sense told me that I couldn't walk locked arms with her, for she wuz built out in the water, on a stagin' that lifted her up thirty or forty feet higher.
And her hands wuz stretched out as if to welcome Columbia, who wuz a-sailin' right towards her. On the right hand a globe was held; the left arm extended above her head, holdin' a pole.
I didn't know what that pole wuz for, and I didn't ask; but she held it some as if she wuz liable to bring it down onto the globe and gin it a whack. And I didn't wonder.
It is enough to make a stun woman, or a wooden female, mad, to see how the nation always depicters wimmen in statutes, and pictures, and things, as if they wuz a-holdin' the hull world in the palm of their hand, when they hain't, in reality, willin' to gin 'em the right that a banty hen has to take care of their own young ones, and protect 'em from the hoverin' hawks of intemperance and every evil.
But mebby she didn't have no idee of givin' a whack at the globe; she wuz a-holdin' it stiddy when I seen her, and she looked calm, and middlin' serene, and as beautiful, and lofty, and inspirin' as they make.
She wuz dressed well, and a eagle had come to rest on her bosom, symbolical, mebby, of how wimmen's heart has, all through the ages, been the broodin' place and the rest of eagle man, and her heart warmed by its soft, flutterin' feathers, and pierced by its cruel beak.
The crown wore on top of her noble forehead wuz dretful appropriate to show what wuz inside of a woman's head; for it wuz made of electric lights—flashin' lights, and strange, wrought of that mysterious substance that we don't understand yet.
But we know that it is luminous, fur-reachin' in its rays, and possesses almost divine intelligence.
It sheds its pure white light a good ways now, and no knowin' how much further it is a-goin' to flash 'em out—no knowin' what sublime and divine power of intelligence it will yet grow to be, when it is fully understood, and when it has the full, free power to branch out, and do all that is in it to do.
Jest like wimmen's love, and divine ardor, and holy desires for a world's good—jest exactly.
It wuz a good-lookin' head-dress.
Her figger wuz noble, jest as majestic and perfect as the human form can be. And it stood up there jest as the Lord meant wimmen to stand, not lookin' like a hour-glass or a pismire, but a good sensible waist on her, jest as human creeters ort to have.
I don't know what dressmakers would think of her. I dare presoom to say they would look down on her because she didn't taper. And they would probable be disgusted because she didn't wear cossets.
But to me one of the greatest and grandest uses of that noble figger wuz to stand up there a-preachin' to more than a million wimmen daily of the beauty and symmetry of a perfect form, jest as the Lord made it, before it wuz tortured down into deformity and disease by whalebones and cosset strings.
Imagine that stately, noble presence a-scrunchin' herself in to make a taper on herself—or to have her long, graceful, stately draperies cut off into a coat-tail bask—the idee!
Here wuz the beauty and dignity of the human form, onbroken by vanity and folly. And I did hope my misguided sect would take it to heart.
And of all the crowds of wimmen I see a-standin' in front of it admirin' it, I never see any of 'em, even if their own waists did look like pismires, but what liked its looks.
Till one day I did see two tall, spindlin', fashionable-lookin' wimmen a-lookin' at it, and one sez to the other:
"Oh, how sweet she would look in elbow-sleeves and a tight-fittin' polenay!"
"Yes," sez the other; "and a bell skirt ruffled almost to the waist, and a Gainsboro hat, and a parasol."
"And high-heel shoes and seven-button gloves," sez the other.
And I turned my back on them then and there, and don't know what other improvements they did want to add to her—most likely a box of French candy, a card-case, some eye-glasses, a yeller-covered novel, and a pug dog. The idee!
"How sweet she would look!""How sweet she would look!"
And as I wended on at a pretty good jog after hearin' 'em, I sez to myself—
"Some wimmen are born fools, some achieve foolishness, and some have foolishness thrust on 'em, and I guess them two had all three of 'em."
I said it to myself loud enough so's Josiah heard me, and he sez in joyful axents—
"I am glad, Samantha, that you have come to your senses at last, and have a realizin' sense of your sect's weaknesses and folly."
And I wuz that wrought up with different emotions that I wuz almost perfectly by the side of myself, and I jest said to him—
"Shet up!"
I wouldn't argy with him. I wuz fearful excited a-contemplatin' the heights of true womanhood and the depths of fashionable folly that a few—a very few—of my sect yet waded round in.
But after I got quite a considerable distance off, I instinctively turned and looked up to the face of that noble creeter, the Republic.
And I see that she didn't care what wuz said about her.
Her face wuz sot towards the free, fresh air of the future—the past wuz behind her. The winds of Heaven wuz fannin' her noble fore-top, her eyes wuz lookin' off into the fur depths of space, her lips wuz wreathed with smiles caught from the sun and the dew, and the fire of the golden dawn.
She wuz riz up above the blame or praise—the belittlin', foolish, personal babblin' of contemporary criticism.
Her head wuz lifted towards the stars.
But to resoom, and continue on.
After we reluctantly left off contemplatin' that statute of Woman, we wended along to the buildin' of Manafactures and Liberal Arts, that colossial structure that dwarfs all the other giants of the Exposition.
This is the largest buildin' ever constructed by any exposition whatsoever.
It covers with its galleries forty acres of land—it is as big as the hull of Elam Bobbet's farm—and Elam gets a good livin' offen that farm for him and Amanda and eight children, and he raises all kinds of crops on it, besides cows, and colts, and hens, grass land and pasture, and a creek goes a-runnin' through it, besides a piece of wood lot.
And then, think to have one buildin' cover a place as large as Elam's farm! Why, jest the idee on't would, I believe, stunt Amanda Bobbet, or else throw her into spazzums.
For she has always felt dretful proud of their farm, and the size of it; she has always said that it come hard on Elam to do all the work himself on such a big farm. She has acted haughty.
And then, if I could have took Amanda by the hand, and sez—
"Here, Amanda, is one house that covers as much ground as your hull farm!"
I believe she would have fell right down in a coniption fit.
But Amanda wuzn't there; I had only my faithful pardner to share my emotions, as I went into one of its four great entrances, under its triumphal arches, each one bein' 40 feet wide and 80 feet high—as long as from our house to the back pasture.
The idee! the idee!
Why, to change my metafor a little about the bigness of this buildin', so's to let foreign nations git a little clearer idee of the size on't, I will state—
This one house is bigger than all those of Jonesville, and Loontown, and Shackville, and Zoar. It is the biggest house on this planet. Whether they have got any bigger ones in Mars, or Jupiter, or Saturn, I don't know; but I will say this—if they have, and the Marites, and Jupiterians, and Satens, are made up as we be, and calculate to go through the buildin's, I am sorry for their legs.
It faces the lake, in plain view of all admirin' mariners, the long row of arches, and columns; is ornamented beyend anything that Jonesville ever drempt of, or Zoar, and a gallery fifty feet wide runs all round the buildin'; and from this gallery runs eighty-six smaller galleries, so nothin' hinders folks from lookin' down into the big hall below, and seein' the gorgeous seen of the Exposition, and the immense throng of people admirin' it.
As Josiah and I wuz a-wendin' along on the gallery a-frontin' the lake, I heard a man—he looked some like a minister, too—say to another one, sez he, "The style of this buildin' is Corinthian."