CHAPTER I.
THE AUTHOR MEETS WITH AN ADVERTISEMENT IN “THE TIMES”—FINDS AN UNEXPECTED CHARM IN HIS WIG—UNDERGOES A CROSS-EXAMINATION—RECEIVES HIS CREDENTIALS—MISTAKES HIS ROAD, AND IS SET RIGHT BY A FRIEND—EATS A FAREWELL DINNER AT BLACKWALL—AND FINALLY EMBARKS IN A NEW LINE OF BUSINESS.
THE AUTHOR MEETS WITH AN ADVERTISEMENT IN “THE TIMES”—FINDS AN UNEXPECTED CHARM IN HIS WIG—UNDERGOES A CROSS-EXAMINATION—RECEIVES HIS CREDENTIALS—MISTAKES HIS ROAD, AND IS SET RIGHT BY A FRIEND—EATS A FAREWELL DINNER AT BLACKWALL—AND FINALLY EMBARKS IN A NEW LINE OF BUSINESS.
On a sunny morning in the spring of 184—, I sat lingering over the remains of a late breakfast, at my lodgings in Regent Street. My deed of partnership with Messrs. —— having been cancelled but a few days before, I found myself left without any ostensible means of disposing advantageously of my time, which began to hang somewhat heavily on my hands, for although, in London more especially, there are a thousand ways ofkilling time, it is by no means so easy tohit upon the right method of making the best use of it. Whilst musing on this subject, my eyes wandered over the columns of the “Times” newspaper, which lay on the table before me, and having glanced over sundry announcements of “eligible opportunities,” and notices of various seductive offers of “Partnership,” my attention was suddenly arrested by the following: “Wanted immediately, for service in a foreign country, a gentleman of business-habits and good address. Salary £250. per annum. All expenses paid. Apply personally to Messrs. * * * *, Solicitors, Tokenhouse Yard.”
Whether it was that this particular advertisement seemed to me to possess a greater claim to good faith than others in the same column, or that the words “foreign country,” had some particular charm about them, I know not; all I can say is, that in a quarter of an hour after the third or fourth reading of it, I was on my way to Tokenhouse Yard, having paid a rather more than ordinary attention to the appearance of my outer man.
Arrived at the office of the solicitors, I found upon the staircase, some ten or more persons of various degrees of respectability, each of whom seemed to be regarding a scrap of paper which he held in his hand. With a similar document,I, in my turn was duly served, and found it inscribed, “* * * * of the Overland, 34, Cornhill, destination Egypt.” I followed the rest of my fellow-candidates, for such they doubtless were, into Cornhill, although by the time we got there, I remarked that the number of them was sensibly diminished; but not daring to enter the lists with so many individuals, who, if not exactly “gentlemen,” might possibly, in the terms of the advertisement, be more accustomed to “business habits” than myself, I took the precaution of waiting in ambush near the street door, until, one by one, I had counted them all out. As I watched their faces to mark what success they might have met with, I was not very greatly surprised to hear some such expressions as “No go,” “Walker,” &c., and gathered considerable encouragement therefrom. Having seen the last of them out, I presented myself and paper, and was ushered through an outer office, into the presence of the great “Overland” himself, who, receiving me with a bow, inquired if I came from his solicitors.
“I do.”
“Then go, Sir, and get your hair cut, and return here in a quarter of an hour.”
This cool reception might have damped the courage ofany applicant not quite sohard upas myself, and probably if used, had its weight with many of those who had preceded me. I stood my ground however, and removing my wig, (rather an exuberant one, by Truefit,) I rammed it into my hat.
“Pray, Sir, be seated,” said the “Overland.”
I took a chair and screwed up my courage for a cross-examination.
“Can you drive an engine?”
“I can.”
“Can you speak French?”
“Yes.”
“German and Italian?”
I nodded affirmatively.
“Arabic?” I was about to assent to this query also, but suddenly recollecting that my interrogator might himself be an adept at that tongue, I seasoned my denial with the assurance that I could make myself master of it in a fortnight.
“Do you understand book-keeping by doubly entry?”
Herewasa poser. I have since wondered how I ever got over it. I winked at the Overland, and replied, “Ioughtto.”
“I think you’ll do, Sir,” was his rejoinder; “come and breakfast with me to-morrow morning.” I bowed and withdrew, and whilst adjusting my wig in the outer office, I heard an order given to the head clerk to admit no more applicants. This I regarded as a sure earnest of an engagement, and began to feel myself a man of business again. I fancied myself a full head taller than before, and stooped very low as I threaded some narrow archways near the Bank. How I got home, I cannot distinctly remember, but I packed my portmanteau in readiness for an immediate departure, in spite of the remonstrances of my worthy landlady, who looked on a journey to Egypt in the light of a wanton sacrifice of my life, assuring me that I should die of the plague in less than a week after I got there, and making me promise that I would send her off a mummy immediately on my arrival.
I was punctual to my appointment next morning, and it was fortunate that I was so, for * * * * was never known to be a minute behind time in any thing, and was in the act of pouring out my cup of tea when I entered his apartment. Had I been four minutes later, I might have whistled for my new engagement. Our breakfast over, and some preliminary matters discussed, we hastened to the office.
“Is that letter ready,Mr.Wateley? Very good. Now, Sir, here are your credentials; deliver that document on your arrival in Alexandria, to which you are booked through, viâ Marseilles: call here to-morrow morning at eight for your despatches, take this cheque, and don’t bother me any more. Good morning!”
And the “Overland” vanished into the inner office—the door was shut, and Ineversaw him afterwards!
I suppose I must have stood transfixed for a few moments, for I caught a juvenile clerk grinning at me like a fiend. Feeling, that if I hesitated, I ran a chance of being recalled, and losing my new honours, I ran off to Lombard Street with the cheque; and had the banker’s clerk asked me if it were honestly come by, I believe I should have answered in the negative, being somewhat confused by the odd chain of events, brought about during the last twenty-four hours.
As I hurried through Cheapside, on my return from the Bank, a hand was laid on my shoulder, and a familiar voice inquired, “Where I was off to so fast?” “To Cairo,” I replied, and was again making away, when my friend politely insinuated that I was on the wrong tack, and ought to have gone down Leadenhall Street. He was right, and in return for his information, I consented to partake of some sherryand biscuit at his counting-house hard by. Here I fell in with one or two others, who, hearing of the turn my affairs had taken, insisted on my spending a last evening in their company, and carried me off to a white-bait dinner at Blackwall, from which we did not return until near midnight.
I was awakened early the next morning by one of my companions of the dinner-party, who had made up his mind to see me as far as Paris. He reminded me of what I had somehow or other totally forgotten, that passports mightpossiblybe necessary, and in our hurry to secure these troublesome documents, we overlooked other matters of equal or even greater importance. I turned my back upon London with considerable pleasure, finding that the anticipation of novelty and change of scene, shut the door in the face of all the varied regrets and emotions which had accompanied my former leave-takings. I felt myself cast once more upon the world, to begin life as it were, over again among new scenes and fresh faces, and although I could scarcely be said to have a very distinct idea, either of my ultimate destination, or of the occupation in store for me, I felt prepared to view allen couleur de rose, and steer a straight-forward course through all difficulties.