Bene. Onely foule words, and thereupon I will kisse thee
Beat. Foule words is but foule wind, and foule wind is but foule breath, and foule breath is noisome, therefore I will depart vnkist
Bene. Thou hast frighted the word out of his right sence, so forcible is thy wit, but I must tell thee plainely, Claudio vndergoes my challenge, and either I must shortly heare from him, or I will subscribe him a coward, and I pray thee now tell me, for which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in loue with me? Beat. For them all together, which maintain'd so politique a state of euill, that they will not admit any good part to intermingle with them: but for which of my good parts did you first suffer loue for me? Bene. Suffer loue! a good epithite, I do suffer loue indeede, for I loue thee against my will, Beat. In spight of your heart I think, alas poore heart, if you spight it for my sake, I will spight it for yours, for I will neuer loue that which my friend hates
Bened. Thou and I are too wise to wooe peaceablie
Bea. It appeares not in this confession, there's not one wise man among twentie that will praise himselfe
Bene. An old, an old instance Beatrice, that liu'd in the time of good neighbours, if a man doe not erect in this age his owne tombe ere he dies, hee shall liue no longer in monuments, then the Bels ring, & the Widdow weepes
Beat. And how long is that thinke you? Ben. Question, why an hower in clamour and a quarter in rhewme, therfore is it most expedient for the wise, if Don worme (his conscience) finde no impediment to the contrarie, to be the trumpet of his owne vertues, as I am to my selfe so much for praising my selfe, who I my selfe will beare witnesse is praise worthie, and now tell me, how doth your cosin? Beat. Verie ill
Bene. And how doe you?Beat. Verie ill too.Enter Vrsula.
Bene. Serue God, loue me, and mend, there will I leaueyou too, for here comes one in haste
Vrs. Madam, you must come to your Vncle, yonders old coile at home, it is prooued my Ladie Hero hath bin falselie accusde, the Prince and Claudio mightilie abusde, and Don Iohn is the author of all, who is fled and gone: will you come presentlie? Beat. Will you go heare this newes Signior? Bene. I will liue in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eies: and moreouer, I will goe with thee to thy Vncles.
Exeunt.
Enter Claudio, Prince, and three or foure with Tapers.
Clau. Is this the monument of Leonato?Lord. It is my Lord.
Epitaph.
Done to death by slanderous tongues,Was the Hero that here lies:Death in guerdon of her wrongs,Giues her fame which neuer dies:So the life that dyed with shame,Liues in death with glorious fame.Hang thou there vpon the tombe,Praising her when I am dombe
Clau. Now musick sound & sing your solemn hymne
Song.
Pardon goddesse of the night,Those that slew thy virgin knight,For the which with songs of woe,Round about her tombe they goe:Midnight assist our mone, helpe vs to sigh and grone.Heauily, heauily.Graues yawne and yeelde your dead,Till death be vttered,Heauenly, heauenly
Lo. Now vnto thy bones good night, yeerely will I do this right
Prin. Good morrow masters, put your Torches out,The wolues haue preied, and looke, the gentle dayBefore the wheeles of Phoebus, round aboutDapples the drowsie East with spots of grey:Thanks to you all, and leaue vs, fare you well
Clau. Good morrow masters, each his seuerall way
Prin. Come let vs hence, and put on other weedes,And then to Leonatoes we will goe
Clau. And Hymen now with luckier issue speeds,Then this for whom we rendred vp this woe.
Exeunt.
Enter Leonato, Bene. Marg. Vrsula, old man, Frier, Hero.
Frier. Did I not tell you she was innocent?Leo. So are the Prince and Claudio who accus'd her,Vpon the errour that you heard debated:But Margaret was in some fault for this,Although against her will as it appeares,In the true course of all the question
Old. Well, I am glad that all things sort so well
Bene. And so am I, being else by faith enforc'dTo call young Claudio to a reckoning for it
Leo. Well daughter, and you gentlewomen all,Withdraw into a chamber by your selues,And when I send for you, come hither mask'd:The Prince and Claudio promis'd by this howreTo visit me, you know your office Brother,You must be father to your brothers daughter,And giue her to young Claudio.
Exeunt. Ladies.
Old. Which I will doe with confirm'd countenance
Bene. Frier, I must intreat your paines, I thinke
Frier. To doe what Signior?Bene. To binde me, or vndoe me, one of them:Signior Leonato, truth it is good Signior,Your neece regards me with an eye of fauour
Leo. That eye my daughter lent her, 'tis most true
Bene. And I doe with an eye of loue requite her
Leo. The sight whereof I thinke you had from me,From Claudio, and the Prince, but what's your will?Bened. Your answer sir is Enigmaticall,But for my will, my will is, your good willMay stand with ours, this day to be conioyn'd,In the state of honourable marriage,In which (good Frier) I shall desire your helpe
Leon. My heart is with your liking
Frier. And my helpe.Enter Prince and Claudio, with attendants.
Prin. Good morrow to this faire assembly
Leo. Good morrow Prince, good morrow Claudio:We heere attend you, are you yet determin'd,To day to marry with my brothers daughter?Claud. Ile hold my minde were she an Ethiope
Leo. Call her forth brother, heres the Frier ready
Prin. Good morrow Benedicke, why what's the matter?That you haue such a Februarie face,So full of frost, of storme, and clowdinesse
Claud. I thinke he thinkes vpon the sauage bull:Tush, feare not man, wee'll tip thy hornes with gold,And all Europa shall reioyce at thee,As once Europa did at lusty Ioue,When he would play the noble beast in loue
Ben. Bull Ioue sir, had an amiable low,And some such strange bull leapt your fathers Cow,A got a Calfe in that same noble feat,Much like to you, for you haue iust his bleat.Enter brother, Hero, Beatrice, Margaret, Vrsula.
Cla. For this I owe you: here comes other recknings.Which is the Lady I must seize vpon?Leo. This same is she, and I doe giue you her
Cla. Why then she's mine, sweet let me see your face
Leon. No that you shal not, till you take her hand,Before this Frier, and sweare to marry her
Clau. Giue me your hand before this holy Frier,I am your husband if you like of me
Hero. And when I liu'd I was your other wife,And when you lou'd, you were my other husband
Clau. Another Hero?Hero. Nothing certainer.One Hero died, but I doe liue,And surely as I liue, I am a maid
Prin. The former Hero, Hero that is dead
Leon. Shee died my Lord, but whiles her slander liu'd
Frier. All this amazement can I qualifie,When after that the holy rites are ended,Ile tell you largely of faire Heroes death:Meane time let wonder seeme familiar,And to the chappell let vs presently
Ben. Soft and faire Frier, which is Beatrice?Beat. I answer to that name, what is your will?Bene. Doe not you loue me?Beat. Why no, no more then reason
Bene. Why then your Vncle, and the Prince, & Claudio,haue beene deceiued, they swore you did
Beat. Doe not you loue mee?Bene. Troth no, no more then reason
Beat. Why then my Cosin Margaret and VrsulaAre much deceiu'd, for they did sweare you did
Bene. They swore you were almost sicke for me
Beat. They swore you were wel-nye dead for me
Bene. 'Tis no matter, then you doe not loue me?Beat. No truly, but in friendly recompence
Leon. Come Cosin, I am sure you loue the gentlema[n]
Clau. And Ile be sworne vpon't, that he loues her,For heres a paper written in his hand,A halting sonnet of his owne pure braine,Fashioned to Beatrice
Hero. And heeres another,Writ in my cosins hand, stolne from her pocket,Containing her affection vnto Benedicke
Bene. A miracle, here's our owne hands against our hearts: come I will haue thee, but by this light I take thee for pittie
Beat. I would not denie you, but by this good day, I yeeld vpon great perswasion, & partly to saue your life, for I was told, you were in a consumption
Leon. Peace I will stop your mouth
Prin. How dost thou Benedicke the married man? Bene. Ile tell thee what Prince: a Colledge of witte-crackers cannot flout mee out of my humour, dost thou think I care for a Satyre or an Epigram? no, if a man will be beaten with braines, a shall weare nothing handsome about him: in briefe, since I do purpose to marry, I will thinke nothing to any purpose that the world can say against it, and therefore neuer flout at me, for I haue said against it: for man is a giddy thing, and this is my conclusion: for thy part Claudio, I did thinke to haue beaten thee, but in that thou art like to be my kinsman, liue vnbruis'd, and loue my cousin
Cla. I had well hop'd y wouldst haue denied Beatrice, y I might haue cudgel'd thee out of thy single life, to make thee a double dealer, which out of questio[n] thou wilt be, if my Cousin do not looke exceeding narrowly to thee
Bene. Come, come, we are friends, let's haue a dance ere we are married, that we may lighten our own hearts, and our wiues heeles
Leon. Wee'll haue dancing afterward
Bene. First, of my word, therfore play musick. Prince, thou art sad, get thee a wife, get thee a wife, there is no staff more reuerend then one tipt with horn. Enter. Mes.
Messen. My Lord, your brother Iohn is tane in flight,And brought with armed men backe to Messina
Bene. Thinke not on him till to morrow, ile deuisethee braue punishments for him: strike vp Pipers.
Dance.
FINIS. Much adoe about Nothing.
Loues Labour's lost
Actus primus.
Enter Ferdinand King of Nauarre, Berowne, Longauill, andDumane.
Ferdinand. Let Fame, that all hunt after in their liues,Liue registred vpon our brazen Tombes,And then grace vs in the disgrace of death:when spight of cormorant deuouring Time,Th' endeuour of this present breath may buy:That honour which shall bate his sythes keene edge,And make vs heyres of all eternitie.Therefore braue Conquerours, for so you are,That warre against your owne affections,And the huge Armie of the worlds desires.Our late edict shall strongly stand in force,Nauar shall be the wonder of the world.Our Court shall be a little Achademe,Still and contemplatiue in liuing Art.You three, Berowne, Dumaine, and Longauill,Haue sworne for three yeeres terme, to liue with me:My fellow Schollers, and to keepe those statutesThat are recorded in this scedule heere.Your oathes are past, and now subscribe your names:That his owne hand may strike his honour downe,That violates the smallest branch heerein:If you are arm'd to doe, as sworne to do,Subscribe to your deepe oathes, and keepe it to
Longauill. I am resolu'd, 'tis but a three yeeres fast:The minde shall banquet, though the body pine,Fat paunches haue leane pates: and dainty bits,Make rich the ribs, but bankerout the wits
Dumane. My louing Lord, Dumane is mortified,The grosser manner of these worlds delights,He throwes vpon the grosse worlds baser slaues:To loue, to wealth, to pompe, I pine and die,With all these liuing in Philosophie
Berowne. I can but say their protestation ouer,So much, deare Liege, I haue already sworne,That is, to liue and study heere three yeeres.But there are other strict obseruances:As not to see a woman in that terme,Which I hope well is not enrolled there.And one day in a weeke to touch no foode:And but one meale on euery day beside:The which I hope is not enrolled there.And then to sleepe but three houres in the night,And not be seene to winke of all the day.When I was wont to thinke no harme all night,And make a darke night too of halfe the day:Which I hope well is not enrolled there.O, these are barren taskes, too hard to keepe,Not to see Ladies, study, fast, not sleepe
Ferd. Your oath is past, to passe away from these
Berow. Let me say no my Liedge, and if you please,I onely swore to study with your grace,And stay heere in your Court for three yeeres space
Longa. You swore to that Berowne, and to the rest
Berow. By yea and nay sir, than I swore in iest.What is the end of study, let me know?Fer. Why that to know which else wee should notknow
Ber. Things hid & bard (you meane) fro[m] co[m]mon sense
Ferd. I, that is studies god-like recompence
Bero. Come on then, I will sweare to studie so,To know the thing I am forbid to know:As thus, to study where I well may dine,When I to fast expressely am forbid.Or studie where to meete some Mistresse fine,When Mistresses from common sense are hid.Or hauing sworne too hard a keeping oath,Studie to breake it, and not breake my troth.If studies gaine be thus, and this be so,Studie knowes that which yet it doth not know,Sweare me to this, and I will nere say no
Ferd. These be the stops that hinder studie quite,And traine our intellects to vaine delight
Ber. Why? all delights are vaine, and that most vaineWhich with paine purchas'd, doth inherit paine,As painefully to poare vpon a Booke,To seeke the light of truth, while truth the whileDoth falsely blinde the eye-sight of his looke:Light seeking light, doth light of light beguile:So ere you finde where light in darkenesse lies,Your light growes darke by losing of your eyes.Studie me how to please the eye indeede,By fixing it vpon a fairer eye,Who dazling so, that eye shall be his heed,And giue him light that it was blinded by.Studie is like the heauens glorious Sunne,That will not be deepe search'd with sawcy lookes:Small haue continuall plodders euer wonne,Saue base authoritie from others Bookes.These earthly Godfathers of heauens lights,That giue a name to euery fixed Starre,Haue no more profit of their shining nights,Then those that walke and wot not what they are.Too much to know, is to know nought but fame:And euery Godfather can giue a name
Fer. How well hee's read, to reason against reading
Dum. Proceeded well, to stop all good proceeding
Lon. Hee weedes the corne, and still lets grow theweeding
Ber. The Spring is neare when greene geesse are abreeding
Dum. How followes that?Ber. Fit in his place and time
Dum. In reason nothing
Ber. Something then in rime
Ferd. Berowne is like an enuious sneaping Frost,That bites the first borne infants of the Spring
Ber. Wel, say I am, why should proud Summer boast,Before the Birds haue any cause to sing?Why should I ioy in any abortiue birth?At Christmas I no more desire a Rose,Then wish a Snow in Mayes new fangled showes:But like of each thing that in season growes.So you to studie now it is too late,That were to clymbe ore the house to vnlocke the gate
Fer. Well, sit you out: go home Berowne: adue
Ber. No my good Lord, I haue sworn to stay with you.And though I haue for barbarisme spoke more,Then for that Angell knowledge you can say,Yet confident Ile keepe what I haue sworne,And bide the pennance of each three yeares day.Giue me the paper, let me reade the same,And to the strictest decrees Ile write my name
Fer. How well this yeelding rescues thee from shame
Ber. Item. That no woman shall come within a mileof my Court.Hath this bin proclaimed?Lon. Foure dayes agoe
Ber. Let's see the penaltie.On paine of loosing her tongue.Who deuis'd this penaltie?Lon. Marry that did I
Ber. Sweete Lord, and why? Lon. To fright them hence with that dread penaltie, A dangerous law against gentilitie. Item, If any man be seene to talke with a woman within the tearme of three yeares, hee shall indure such publique shame as the rest of the Court shall possibly deuise
Ber. This Article my Liedge your selfe must breake,For well you know here comes in EmbassieThe French Kings daughter, with your selfe to speake:A Maide of grace and compleate maiestie,About surrender vp of Aquitaine:To her decrepit, sicke, and bed-rid Father.Therefore this Article is made in vaine,Or vainly comes th' admired Princesse hither
Fer. What say you Lords?Why, this was quite forgot
Ber. So Studie euermore is ouershot,While it doth study to haue what it would,It doth forget to doe the thing it should:And when it hath the thing it hunteth most,'Tis won as townes with fire, so won, so lost
Fer. We must of force dispence with this Decree,She must lye here on meere necessitie
Ber. Necessity will make vs all forsworneThree thousand times within this three yeeres space:For euery man with his affects is borne,Not by might mastred, but by speciall grace.If I breake faith, this word shall breake for me,I am forsworne on meere necessitie.So to the Lawes at large I write my name,And he that breakes them in the least degree,Stands in attainder of eternall shame.Suggestions are to others as to me:But I beleeue although I seeme so loth,I am the last that will last keepe his oth.But is there no quicke recreation granted?Fer. I that there is, our Court you know is hantedWith a refined trauailer of Spaine,A man in all the worlds new fashion planted,That hath a mint of phrases in his braine:One, who the musicke of his owne vaine tongue,Doth rauish like inchanting harmonie:A man of complements whom right and wrongHaue chose as vmpire of their mutinie.This childe of fancie that Armado hight,For interim to our studies shall relate,In high-borne words the worth of many a Knight:From tawnie Spaine lost in the worlds debate.How you delight my Lords, I know not I,But I protest I loue to heare him lie,And I will vse him for my Minstrelsie
Bero. Armado is a most illustrious wight,A man of fire, new words, fashions owne Knight
Lon. Costard the swaine and he, shall be our sport,And so to studie, three yeeres is but short.Enter a Constable with Costard with a Letter.
Const. Which is the Dukes owne person
Ber. This fellow, What would'st?Con. I my selfe reprehend his owne person, for I amhis graces Tharborough: But I would see his own personin flesh and blood
Ber. This is he
Con. Signeor Arme, Arme commends you:Ther's villanie abroad, this letter will tell you more
Clow. Sir the Contempts thereof are as touchingmee
Fer. A letter from the magnificent Armado
Ber. How low soeuer the matter, I hope in God for high words
Lon. A high hope for a low heauen, God grant vs patience
Ber. To heare, or forbeare hearing
Lon. To heare meekely sir, and to laugh moderately,or to forbeare both
Ber. Well sir, be it as the stile shall giue vs cause toclime in the merrinesse
Clo. The matter is to me sir, as concerning Iaquenetta.The manner of it is, I was taken with the manner
Ber. In what manner? Clo. In manner and forme following sir all those three. I was seene with her in the Mannor house, sitting with her vpon the Forme, and taken following her into the Parke: which put to gether, is in manner and forme following. Now sir for the manner; It is the manner of a man to speake to a woman, for the forme in some forme
Ber. For the following sir
Clo. As it shall follow in my correction, and God defendthe right
Fer. Will you heare this Letter with attention?Ber. As we would heare an Oracle
Clo. Such is the simplicitie of man to harken after theflesh
Ferdinand. Great Deputie, the Welkins Vicegerent, and soledominatorof Nauar, my soules earths God, and bodies fostringpatrone:Cost. Not a word of Costard yet
Ferd. So it is
Cost. It may be so: but if he say it is so, he is in tellingtrue: but so
Ferd. Peace,Clow. Be to me, and euery man that dares not fight
Ferd. No words,Clow. Of other mens secrets I beseech you
Ferd. So it is besieged with sable coloured melancholie, I did commend the blacke oppressing humour to the most wholesome Physicke of thy health-giuing ayre: And as I am a Gentleman, betooke my selfe to walke: the time When? about the sixt houre, When beasts most grase, birds best pecke, and men sit downe to that nourishment which is called supper: So much for the time When. Now for the ground Which? which I meane I walkt vpon, it is ycliped, Thy Parke. Then for the place Where? where I meane I did encounter that obscene and most preposterous euent that draweth from my snow-white pen the ebon coloured Inke, which heere thou viewest, beholdest: suruayest, or seest. But to the place Where? It standeth North North-east and by East from the West corner of thy curious knotted garden; There did I see that low spirited Swaine, that base Minow of thy myrth, Clown. Mee? Ferd. that vnletered small knowing soule, Clow Me? Ferd. that shallow vassall Clow. Still mee?) Ferd. which as I remember, hight Costard, Clow. O me) Ferd. sorted and consorted contrary to thy established proclaymed Edict and Continent, Cannon: Which with, o with, but with this I passion to say wherewith: Clo. With a Wench
Ferd. With a childe of our Grandmother Eue, a female; or for thy more sweet understanding a woman: him, I (as my euer esteemed dutie prickes me on) haue sent to thee, to receiue the meed of punishment by the sweet Graces Officer Anthony Dull, a man of good repute, carriage, bearing, & estimation
Anth. Me, an't shall please you? I am Anthony Dull
Ferd. For Iaquenetta (so is the weaker vessell called) which I apprehended with the aforesaid Swaine, I keepe her as a vessell of thy Lawes furie, and shall at the least of thy sweet notice, bring her to triall. Thine in all complements of deuoted and heart-burning heat of dutie. Don Adriana de Armado
Ber. This is not so well as I looked for, but the bestthat euer I heard
Fer. I the best, for the worst. But sirra, What say youto this?Clo. Sir I confesse the Wench
Fer. Did you heare the Proclamation?Clo. I doe confesse much of the hearing it, but littleof the marking of it
Fer. It was proclaimed a yeeres imprisonment to beetaken with a Wench
Clow. I was taken with none sir, I was taken with aDamosell
Fer. Well, it was proclaimed Damosell
Clo. This was no Damosell neyther sir, shee was aVirgin
Fer. It is so varried to, for it was proclaimed Virgin
Clo. If it were, I denie her Virginitie: I was taken with a Maide
Fer. This Maid will not serue your turne sir
Clo. This Maide will serue my turne sir
Kin. Sir I will pronounce your sentence: You shallfast a Weeke with Branne and water
Clo. I had rather pray a Moneth with Mutton andPorridge
Kin. And Don Armado shall be your keeper.My Lord Berowne, see him deliuer'd ore,And goe we Lords to put in practice that,Which each to other hath so strongly sworne
Bero. Ile lay my head to any good mans hat,These oathes and lawes will proue an idle scorne.Sirra, come on
Clo. I suffer for the truth sir: for true it is, I was taken with Iaquenetta, and Iaquenetta is a true girle, and therefore welcome the sowre cup of prosperitie, affliction may one day smile againe, and vntill then sit downe sorrow. Enter.
Enter Armado and Moth his Page.
Arma. Boy, What signe is it when a man of greatspirit growes melancholy?Boy. A great signe sir, that he will looke sad
Brag. Why? sadnesse is one and the selfe-same thingdeare impe
Boy. No no, O Lord sir no
Brag. How canst thou part sadnesse and melancholymy tender Iuuenall?Boy. By a familiar demonstration of the working, mytough signeur
Brag. Why tough signeur? Why tough signeur?Boy. Why tender Iuuenall? Why tender Iuuenall?Brag. I spoke it tender Iuuenall, as a congruent apathaton,appertaining to thy young daies, which we maynominate tender
Boy. And I tough signeur, as an appertinent title toyour olde time, which we may name tough
Brag. Pretty and apt
Boy. How meane you sir, I pretty, and my saying apt?or I apt, and my saying prettie?Brag. Thou pretty because little
Boy. Little pretty, because little: wherefore apt?Brag. And therefore apt, because quicke
Boy. Speake you this in my praise Master?Brag. In thy condigne praise
Boy. I will praise an Eele with the same praise
Brag. What? that an Eele is ingenuous
Boy. That an Eele is quicke
Brag. I doe say thou art quicke in answeres. Thou heat'st my bloud
Boy. I am answer'd sir
Brag. I loue not to be crost
Boy. He speakes the meere contrary, crosses loue not him
Br. I haue promis'd to study iij. yeres with the Duke
Boy. You may doe it in an houre sir
Brag. Impossible
Boy. How many is one thrice told?Bra. I am ill at reckning, it fits the spirit of a Tapster
Boy. You are a gentleman and a gamester sir
Brag. I confesse both, they are both the varnish of acompleat man
Boy. Then I am sure you know how much the grossesumme of deus-ace amounts to
Brag. It doth amount to one more then two
Boy. Which the base vulgar call three
Br. True
Boy. Why sir is this such a peece of study? Now here's three studied, ere you'll thrice wink, & how easie it is to put yeres to the word three, and study three yeeres in two words, the dancing horse will tell you
Brag. A most fine Figure
Boy. To proue you a Cypher
Brag. I will heereupon confesse I am in loue: and as it is base for a Souldier to loue; so am I in loue with a base wench. If drawing my sword against the humour of affection, would deliuer mee from the reprobate thought of it, I would take Desire prisoner, and ransome him to any French Courtier for a new deuis'd curtsie. I thinke scorne to sigh, me thinkes I should out-sweare Cupid. Comfort me Boy, What great men haue beene in loue? Boy. Hercules Master
Brag. Most sweete Hercules: more authority deare Boy, name more; and sweet my childe let them be men of good repute and carriage
Boy. Sampson Master, he was a man of good carriage, great carriage: for hee carried the Towne-gates on his backe like a Porter: and he was in loue
Brag. O well-knit Sampson, strong ioynted Sampson;I doe excell thee in my rapier, as much as thou didst meein carrying gates. I am in loue too. Who was Sampsonsloue my deare Moth?Boy. A Woman, Master
Brag. Of what complexion?Boy. Of all the foure, or the three, or the two, or oneof the foure
Brag. Tell me precisely of what complexion?Boy. Of the sea-water Greene sir
Brag. Is that one of the foure complexions?Boy. As I haue read sir, and the best of them too
Brag. Greene indeed is the colour of Louers: but to haue a Loue of that colour, methinkes Sampson had small reason for it. He surely affected her for her wit
Boy. It was so sir, for she had a greene wit
Brag. My Loue is most immaculate white and red
Boy. Most immaculate thoughts Master, are mask'd vnder such colours
Brag. Define, define, well educated infant
Boy. My fathers witte, and my mothers tongue assistmee
Brag. Sweet inuocation of a childe, most pretty andpatheticall
Boy. If shee be made of white and red,Her faults will nere be knowne:For blushin cheekes by faults are bred,And feares by pale white showne:Then if she feare, or be to blame,By this you shall not know,For still her cheekes possesse the same,Which natiue she doth owe:A dangerous rime master against the reason of whiteand redde
Brag. Is there not a ballet Boy, of the King and the Begger? Boy. The world was very guilty of such a Ballet some three ages since, but I thinke now 'tis not to be found: or if it were, it would neither serue for the writing, nor the tune
Brag. I will haue that subiect newly writ ore, that I may example my digression by some mighty president. Boy, I doe loue that Countrey girle that I tooke in the Parke with the rationall hinde Costard: she deserues well
Boy. To bee whip'd: and yet a better loue then myMaster
Brag. Sing Boy, my spirit grows heauy in loue
Boy. And that's great maruell, louing a light wench
Brag. I say sing
Boy. Forbeare till this company be past.Enter Clowne, Constable, and Wench.
Const. Sir, the Dukes pleasure, is that you keepe Costard safe, and you must let him take no delight, nor no penance, but hee must fast three daies a weeke: for this Damsell, I must keepe her at the Parke, shee is alowd for the Day-woman. Fare you well. Enter.
Brag. I do betray my selfe with blushing: Maide
Maid. Man
Brag. I wil visit thee at the Lodge
Maid. That's here by
Brag. I know where it is situate
Mai. Lord how wise you are!Brag. I will tell thee wonders
Ma. With what face?Brag. I loue thee
Mai. So I heard you say
Brag. And so farewell
Mai. Faire weather after you
Clo. Come Iaquenetta, away.
Exeunt.
Brag. Villaine, thou shalt fast for thy offences erethou be pardoned
Clo. Well sir, I hope when I doe it, I shall doe it on afull stomacke
Brag. Thou shalt be heauily punished
Clo. I am more bound to you then your fellowes, for they are but lightly rewarded
Clo. Take away this villaine, shut him vp
Boy. Come you transgressing slaue, away
Clow. Let mee not bee pent vp sir, I will fast beingloose
Boy. No sir, that were fast and loose: thou shalt toprison
Clow. Well, if euer I do see the merry dayes of desolationthat I haue seene, some shall see
Boy. What shall some see? Clow. Nay nothing, Master Moth, but what they looke vpon. It is not for prisoners to be silent in their words, and therefore I will say nothing: I thanke God, I haue as little patience as another man, and therefore I can be quiet. Enter.
Brag. I doe affect the very ground (which is base) where her shooe (which is baser) guided by her foote (which is basest) doth tread. I shall be forsworn (which is a great argument of falshood) if I loue. And how can that be true loue, which is falsly attempted? Loue is a familiar, Loue is a Diuell. There is no euill Angell but Loue, yet Sampson was so tempted, and he had an excellent strength: Yet was Salomon so seduced, and hee had a very good witte. Cupids Butshaft is too hard for Hercules Clubbe, and therefore too much ods for a Spaniards Rapier: The first and second cause will not serue my turne: the Passado hee respects not, the Duello he regards not; his disgrace is to be called Boy, but his glorie is to subdue men. Adue Valour, rust Rapier, bee still Drum, for your manager is in loue; yea hee loueth. Assist me some extemporall god of Rime, for I am sure I shall turne Sonnet. Deuise Wit, write Pen, for I am for whole volumes in folio.
Enter.
Finis Actus Primus.
Actus Secunda.
Enter the Princesse of France, with three attending Ladies, andthreeLords
Boyet. Now Madam summon vp your dearest spirits,Consider who the King your father sends:To whom he sends, and what's his Embassie.Your selfe, held precious in the worlds esteeme,To parlee with the sole inheritourOf all perfections that a man may owe,Matchlesse Nauarre, the plea of no lesse weightThen Aquitaine, a Dowrie for a Queene,Be now as prodigall of all deare grace,As Nature was in making Graces deare,When she did starue the generall world beside,And prodigally gaue them all to you
Queen. Good L[ord]. Boyet, my beauty though but mean,Needs not the painted flourish of your praise:Beauty is bought by iudgement of the eye,Not vttred by base sale of chapmens tongues:I am lesse proud to heare you tell my worth,Then you much willing to be counted wise,In spending your wit in the praise of mine.But now to taske the tasker, good Boyet
Prin. You are not ignorant all-telling fameDoth noyse abroad Nauar hath made a vow,Till painefull studie shall out-weare three yeares,No woman may approach his silent Court:Therefore to's seemeth it a needfull course,Before we enter his forbidden gates,To know his pleasure, and in that behalfeBold of your worthinesse, we single you,As our best mouing faire soliciter:Tell him, the daughter of the King of France,On serious businesse crauing quicke dispatch,Importunes personall conference with his grace.Haste, signifie so much while we attend,Like humble visag'd suters his high will
Boy. Proud of imployment, willingly I goe.Enter.
Prin. All pride is willing pride, and yours is so:Who are the Votaries my Louing Lords, that are vow-felloweswith this vertuous Duke?Lor. Longauill is one
Princ. Know you the man?1 Lady. I know him Madame at a marriage feast,Betweene L[ord]. Perigort and the beautious heireOf Iaques Fauconbridge solemnized.In Normandie saw I this Longauill,A man of soueraigne parts he is esteem'd:Well fitted in Arts, glorious in Armes:Nothing becomes him ill that he would well.The onely soyle of his faire vertues glosse,If vertues glosse will staine with any soile,Is a sharp wit match'd with too blunt a Will:Whose edge hath power to cut whose will still wills,It should none spare that come within his power
Prin. Some merry mocking Lord belike, ist so?Lad.1. They say so most, that most his humors know
Prin. such short liu'd wits do wither as they grow.Who are the rest?2.Lad. The yong Dumaine, a well accomplisht youth,Of all that Vertue loue, for Vertue loued.Most power to doe most harme, least knowing ill:For he hath wit to make an ill shape good,And shape to win grace though she had no wit.I saw him at the Duke Alansoes once,And much too little of that good I saw,Is my report to his great worthinesse
Rossa. Another of these Students at that time,Was there with him, as I haue heard a truth.Berowne they call him, but a merrier man,Within the limit of becomming mirth,I neuer spent an houres talke withall.His eye begets occasion for his wit,For euery obiect that the one doth catch,The other turnes to a mirth-mouing iest.Which his faire tongue (conceits expositor)Deliuers in such apt and gracious words,That aged eares play treuant at his tales,And yonger hearings are quite rauished.So sweet and voluble is his discourse
Prin. God blesse my Ladies, are they all in loue?That euery one her owne hath garnished,With such bedecking ornaments of praise
Ma. Heere comes Boyet.Enter Boyet.
Prin. Now, what admittance Lord?Boyet. Nauar had notice of your faire approach;And he and his competitors in oath,Were all addrest to meete you gentle LadyBefore I came: Marrie thus much I haue learnt,He rather meanes to lodge you in the field,Like one that comes heere to besiege his Court,Then seeke a dispensation for his oath:To let you enter his vnpeopled house.Enter Nauar, Longauill, Dumaine, and Berowne.
Heere comes Nauar
Nau. Faire Princesse, welcom to the Court of Nauar
Prin. Faire I giue you backe againe, and welcome I haue not yet: the roofe of this Court is too high to bee yours, and welcome to the wide fields, too base to be mine
Nau. You shall be welcome Madam to my Court
Prin. I wil be welcome then, Conduct me thither
Nau. Heare me deare Lady, I haue sworne an oath
Prin. Our Lady helpe my Lord, he'll be forsworne
Nau. Not for the world faire Madam, by my will
Prin. Why, will shall breake it will, and nothing els
Nau. Your Ladiship is ignorant what it is
Prin. Were my Lord so, his ignorance were wise,Where now his knowledge must proue ignorance.I heare your grace hath sworne out House-keeping:'Tis deadly sinne to keepe that oath my Lord,And sinne to breake it:But pardon me, I am too sodaine bold,To teach a Teacher ill beseemeth me.Vouchsafe to read the purpose of my comming,And sodainly resolue me in my suite
Nau. Madam, I will, if sodainly I may
Prin. You will the sooner that I were away,For you'll proue periur'd if you make me stay
Berow. Did not I dance with you in Brabant once?Rosa. Did not I dance with you in Brabant once?Ber. I know you did
Rosa. How needlesse was it then to ask the question?Ber. You must not be so quicke
Rosa. 'Tis long of you y spur me with such questions
Ber. Your wit's too hot, it speeds too fast, 'twill tire
Rosa. Not till it leaue the Rider in the mire
Ber. What time a day?Rosa. The howre that fooles should aske
Ber. Now faire befall your maske
Rosa. Faire fall the face it couers
Ber. And send you many louers
Rosa. Amen, so you be none
Ber. Nay then will I be gone
Kin. Madame, your father heere doth intimate,The paiment of a hundred thousand Crownes,Being but th' one halfe, of an intire summe,Disbursed by my father in his warres.But say that he, or we, as neither haueReceiu'd that summe; yet there remaines vnpaidA hundred thousand more: in surety of the which,One part of Aquitaine is bound to vs,Although not valued to the moneys worth.If then the King your father will restoreBut that one halfe which is vnsatisfied,We will giue vp our right in Aquitaine,And hold faire friendship with his Maiestie:But that it seemes he little purposeth,For here he doth demand to haue repaie,An hundred thousand Crownes, and not demandsOne paiment of a hundred thousand Crownes,To haue his title liue in Aquitaine.Which we much rather had depart withall,And haue the money by our father lent,Then Aquitane, so guelded as it is.Deare Princesse, were not his requests so farreFrom reasons yeelding, your faire selfe should makeA yeelding 'gainst some reason in my brest,And goe well satisfied to France againe
Prin. You doe the King my Father too much wrong,And wrong the reputation of your name,In so vnseeming to confesse receytOf that which hath so faithfully beene paid
Kin. I doe protest I neuer heard of it,And if you proue it, Ile repay it backe,Or yeeld vp Aquitaine
Prin. We arrest your word:Boyet, you can produce acquittancesFor such a summe, from speciall Officers,Of Charles his Father
Kin. Satisfie me so
Boyet. So please your Grace, the packet is not comeWhere that and other specialties are bound,To morrow you shall haue a sight of them
Kin. It shall suffice me; at which enterview,All liberall reason would I yeeld vnto:Meane time, receiue such welcome at my hand,As honour, without breach of Honour mayMake tender of, to thy true worthinesse.You may not come faire Princesse in my gates,But heere without you shall be so receiu'd,As you shall deeme your selfe lodg'd in my heart,Though so deni'd farther harbour in my house:Your owne good thoughts excuse me, and farewell,To morrow we shall visit you againe
Prin. Sweet health & faire desires consort your grace
Kin. Thy own wish wish I thee, in euery place.Enter.
Boy. Lady, I will commend you to my owne heart
La.Ro. Pray you doe my commendations,I would be glad to see it
Boy. I would you heard it grone
La.Ro. Is the soule sicke?Boy. Sicke at the heart
La.Ro. Alacke, let it bloud
Boy. Would that doe it good?La.Ro. My Phisicke saies I
Boy. Will you prick't with your eye
La.Ro. No poynt, with my knife
Boy. Now God saue thy life
La.Ro. And yours from long liuing
Ber. I cannot stay thanks-giuing.Enter.
Enter Dumane.
Dum. Sir, I pray you a word: What Lady is that same?Boy. The heire of Alanson, Rosalin her name
Dum. A gallant Lady, Mounsier fare you well
Long. I beseech you a word: what is she in the white?Boy. A woman somtimes, if you saw her in the light
Long. Perchance light in the light: I desire her name
Boy. Shee hath but one for her selfe,To desire that were a shame
Long. Pray you sir, whose daughter?Boy. Her Mothers, I haue heard
Long. Gods blessing a your beard
Boy. Good sir be not offended,Shee is an heyre of Faulconbridge
Long. Nay, my choller is ended:Shee is a most sweet Lady.
Exit. Long.
Boy. Not vnlike sir, that may be.Enter Beroune.
Ber. What's her name in the cap
Boy. Katherine by good hap
Ber. Is she wedded, or no
Boy. To her will sir, or so,Ber. You are welcome sir, adiew
Boy. Fare well to me sir, and welcome to you.Enter.
La.Ma. That last is Beroune, the mery mad-cap Lord.Not a word with him, but a iest
Boy. And euery iest but a word
Pri. It was well done of you to take him at his word
Boy. I was as willing to grapple, as he was to boord
La.Ma. Two hot Sheepes marie:And wherefore not Ships?Boy. No Sheepe (sweet Lamb) vnlesse we feed on your lips
La. You Sheepe & I pasture: shall that finish the iest?Boy. So you grant pasture for me
La. Not so gentle beast.My lips are no Common, though seuerall they be
Bo. Belonging to whom?La. To my fortunes and me
Prin. Good wits wil be iangling, but gentles agree.This ciuill warre of wits were much better vsedOn Nauar and his bookemen, for heere 'tis abus'd
Bo. If my obseruation (which very seldome liesBy the hearts still rhetoricke, disclosed with eyes)Deceiue me not now, Nauar is infected
Prin. With what?Bo. With that which we Louers intitle affected
Prin. Your reason
Bo. Why all his behauiours doe make their retire,To the court of his eye, peeping thorough desire.His hart like an Agot with your print impressed,Proud with his forme, in his eie pride expressed.His tongue all impatient to speake and not see,Did stumble with haste in his eie-sight to be,All sences to that sence did make their repaire,To feele onely looking on fairest of faire:Me thought all his sences were lockt in his eye,As Iewels in Christall for some Prince to Buy.Who tendring their own worth from whence they were glast,Did point out to buy them along as you past.His faces owne margent did coate such amazes,That all eyes saw his eies inchanted with gazes.Ile giue you Aquitaine, and all that is his,And you giue him for my sake, but one louing Kisse
Prin. Come to our Pauillion, Boyet is disposde
Bro. But to speak that in words, which his eie hath disclos'd.I onelie haue made a mouth of his eie,By adding a tongue, which I know will not lie
Lad.Ro. Thou art an old Loue-monger, and speakestskilfully
Lad.Ma. He is Cupids Grandfather, and learnes newsof him
Lad.2. Then was Venus like her mother, for her fatheris but grim
Boy. Do you heare my mad wenches?La.1. No
Boy. What then, do you see?Lad.2. I, our way to be gone
Boy. You are too hard for me.
Exeunt. omnes.
Actus Tertius.
Enter Braggart and Boy.
Song.
Bra. Warble childe, make passionate my sense of hearing
Boy. Concolinel
Brag. Sweete Ayer, go tendernesse of yeares: take this Key, giue enlargement to the swaine, bring him festinatly hither: I must imploy him in a letter to my Loue
Boy. Will you win your loue with a French braule? Bra. How meanest thou, brauling in French? Boy. No my compleat master, but to Iigge off a tune at the tongues end, canarie to it with the feete, humour it with turning vp your eie: sigh a note and sing a note, sometime through the throate: if you swallowed loue with singing, loue sometime through: nose as if you snuft vp loue by smelling loue with your hat penthouselike ore the shop of your eies, with your armes crost on your thinbellie doublet, like a Rabbet on a spit, or your hands in your pocket, like a man after the old painting, and keepe not too long in one tune, but a snip and away: these are complements, these are humours, these betraie nice wenches that would be betraied without these, and make them men of note: do you note men that most are affected to these? Brag. How hast thou purchased this experience? Boy. By my penne of obseruation
Brag. But O, but O
Boy. The Hobbie-horse is forgot
Bra. Cal'st thou my loue Hobbi-horse
Boy. No Master, the Hobbie-horse is but a Colt, andand your Loue perhaps, a Hacknie:but haue you forgot your Loue?Brag. Almost I had
Boy. Negligent student, learne her by heart
Brag. By heart, and in heart Boy
Boy. And out of heart Master: all those three I will proue
Brag. What wilt thou proue? Boy. A man, if I liue (and this) by, in, and without, vpon the instant: by heart you loue her, because your heart cannot come by her: in heart you loue her, because your heart is in loue with her: and out of heart you loue her, being out of heart that you cannot enioy her
Brag. I am all these three
Boy. And three times as much more, and yet nothingat all
Brag. Fetch hither the Swaine, he must carrie mee aletter
Boy. A message well simpathis'd, a Horse to be embassadourfor an Asse
Brag. Ha, ha, What saiest thou?Boy. Marrie sir, you must send the Asse vpon the Horsefor he is verie slow gated: but I goe
Brag. The way is but short, away
Boy. As swift as Lead sir
Brag. Thy meaning prettie ingenious, is not Lead amettall heauie, dull, and slow?Boy. Minnime honest Master, or rather Master no
Brag. I say Lead is slow
Boy. You are too swift sir to say so.Is that Lead slow which is fir'd from a Gunne?Brag. Sweete smoke of Rhetorike,He reputes me a Cannon, and the Bullet that's he:I shoote thee at the Swaine
Boy. Thump then, and I flee
Bra. A most acute Iuuenall, voluble and free of grace,By thy fauour sweet Welkin, I must sigh in thy face.Most rude melancholie, Valour giues thee place.My Herald is return'd.Enter Page and Clowne.
Pag. A wonder Master, here's a Costard broken in ashin
Ar. Some enigma, some riddle, come, thy Lenuoybegin
Clo. No egma, no riddle, no lenuoy, no salue, in thee male sir. Or sir, Plantan, a plaine Plantan: no lenuoy, no lenuoy, no Salue sir, but a Plantan
Ar. By vertue, thou inforcest laughter, thy silliethought, my spleene, the heauing of my lunges prouokesme to rediculous smyling: O pardon me my stars, doththe inconsiderate take salue for lenuoy, and the word lenuoyfor a salue?Pag. Doe the wise thinke them other, is not lenuoy asalue?Ar. No Page, it is an epilogue or discourse to make plaine,Some obscure precedence that hath tofore bin faine.Now will I begin your morrall, and do you follow withmy lenuoy.The Foxe, the Ape, and the Humble-Bee,Were still at oddes, being but three
Arm. Vntill the Goose came out of doore,Staying the oddes by adding foure
Pag. A good Lenuoy, ending in the Goose: would youdesire more?Clo. The Boy hath sold him a bargaine, a Goose, that's flat.Sir, your penny-worth is good, and your Goose be fat.To sell a bargaine well is as cunning as fast and loose:Let me see a fat Lenuoy, I that's a fat Goose
Ar. Come hither, come hither:How did this argument begin?Boy. By saying that a Costard was broken in a shin.Then cal'd you for the Lenuoy
Clow. True, and I for a Plantan:Thus came your argument in:Then the Boyes fat Lenuoy, the Goose that you bought,And he ended the market
Ar. But tell me: How was there a Costard broken ina shin?Pag. I will tell you sencibly
Clow. Thou hast no feeling of it Moth,I will speake that Lenuoy.I Costard running out, that was safely within,Fell ouer the threshold, and broke my shin
Arm. We will talke no more of this matter
Clow. Till there be more matter in the shin
Arm. Sirra Costard, I will infranchise thee
Clow. O, marrie me to one Francis, I smell some Lenuoy, some Goose in this
Arm. By my sweete soule, I meane, setting thee at libertie. Enfreedoming thy person: thou wert emured, restrained, captiuated, bound
Clow. True, true, and now you will be my purgation, and let me loose
Arm. I giue thee thy libertie, set thee from durance, and in lieu thereof, impose on thee nothing but this: Beare this significant to the countrey Maide Iaquenetta: there is remuneration, for the best ward of mine honours is rewarding my dependants. Moth, follow
Pag. Like the sequell I.Signeur Costard adew.Enter.
Clow. My sweete ounce of mans flesh, my inconieIew: Now will I looke to his remuneration.Remuneration, O, that's the Latine word for three-farthings:Three-farthings remuneration, What's the priceof this yncle? i.d. no, Ile giue you a remuneration: Why?It carries it remuneration: Why? It is a fairer name thena French-Crowne. I will neuer buy and sell out of thisword.Enter Berowne.
Ber. O my good knaue Costard, exceedingly well met
Clow. Pray you sir, How much Carnation Ribbonmay a man buy for a remuneration?Ber. What is a remuneration?Cost. Marrie sir, halfe pennie farthing
Ber. O, Why then threefarthings worth of Silke
Cost. I thanke your worship, God be wy you
Ber. O stay slaue, I must employ thee:As thou wilt win my fauour, good my knaue,Doe one thing for me that I shall intreate
Clow. When would you haue it done sir?Ber. O this after-noone
Clo. Well, I will doe it sir: Fare you well
Ber. O thou knowest not what it is
Clo. I shall know sir, when I haue done it
Ber. Why villaine thou must know first
Clo. I wil come to your worship to morrow morning
Ber. It must be done this after-noone,Harke slaue, it is but this:The Princesse comes to hunt here in the Parke,And in her traine there is a gentle Ladie:When tongues speak sweetly, then they name her name,And Rosaline they call her, aske for her:And to her white hand see thou do commendThis seal'd-vp counsaile. Ther's thy guerdon: goe
Clo. Gardon, O sweete gardon, better then remuneration,a leuenpence-farthing better: most sweete gardon.I will doe it sir in print: gardon, remuneration.Enter.
Ber. O, and I forsooth in loue,I that haue beene loues whip?A verie Beadle to a humerous sigh: A Criticke,Nay, a night-watch Constable.A domineering pedant ore the Boy,Then whom no mortall so magnificent,This wimpled, whyning, purblinde waiward Boy,This signior Iunios gyant dwarfe, don Cupid,Regent of Loue-rimes, Lord of folded armes,Th' annointed soueraigne of sighes and groanes:Liedge of all loyterers and malecontents:Dread Prince of Placcats, King of Codpeeces.Sole Emperator and great generallOf trotting Parrators (O my little heart.)And I to be a Corporall of his field,And weare his colours like a Tumblers hoope.What? I loue, I sue, I seeke a wife,A woman that is like a Germane Cloake,Still a repairing: euer out of frame,And neuer going a right, being a Watch:But being watcht, that it may still goe right.Nay, to be periurde, which is worst of all:And among three, to loue the worst of all,A whitly wanton, with a veluet brow.With two pitch bals stucke in her face for eyes.I, and by heauen, one that will doe the deede,Though Argus were her Eunuch and her garde.And I to sigh for her, to watch for her,To pray for her, go to: it is a plagueThat Cupid will impose for my neglect,Of his almighty dreadfull little might.Well, I will loue, write, sigh, pray, shue, grone,Some men must loue my Lady, and some Ione.
Actus Quartus.
Enter the Princesse, a Forrester, her Ladies, and her Lords.
Qu. Was that the King that spurd his horse so hard,Against the steepe vprising of the hill?Boy. I know not, but I thinke it was not he
Qu. Who ere a was, a shew'd a mounting minde:Well Lords, to day we shall haue our dispatch,On Saterday we will returne to France.Then Forrester my friend, Where is the BushThat we must stand and play the murtherer in?For. Hereby vpon the edge of yonder Coppice,A stand where you may make the fairest shoote
Qu. I thanke my beautie, I am faire that shoote,And thereupon thou speak'st the fairest shoote
For. Pardon me Madam, for I meant not so
Qu. What, what? First praise me, & then again say no.O short liu'd pride. Not faire? alacke for woe
For. Yes Madam faire
Qu. Nay, neuer paint me now,Where faire is not, praise cannot mend the brow.Here (good my glasse) take this for telling true:Faire paiment for foule words, is more then due
For. Nothing but faire is that which you inherit
Qu. See, see, my beautie will be sau'd by merit.O heresie in faire, fit for these dayes,A giuing hand, though foule, shall haue faire praise.But come, the Bow: Now Mercie goes to kill,And shooting well, is then accounted ill:Thus will I saue my credit in the shoote,Not wounding, pittie would not let me do't:If wounding, then it was to shew my skill,That more for praise, then purpose meant to kill.And out of question, so it is sometimes:Glory growes guiltie of detested crimes,When for Fames sake, for praise an outward part,We bend to that, the working of the hart.As I for praise alone now seeke to spillThe poore Deeres blood, that my heart meanes no ill
Boy. Do not curst wiues hold that selfe-soueraigntieOnely for praise sake, when they striue to beLords ore their Lords?Qu. Onely for praise, and praise we may afford,To any Lady that subdewes a Lord.Enter Clowne.