Alliterations
I wonder if you know that Betty Botter baked a bit of batter, but her batter was so bitter that to make her bitter batter better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter, and with this bit of better butter Betty Botter made her bitter batter better.
In reply to the question, How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I would say, if a woodchuck would chuck all the wood that a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, a woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
When the tramp begged for somthun to do for a bite o’ bread, the lady of the house said—Did you happen to notice that pile of wood in the yard?
Yes’m, I seen it.
You should mind your grammar. You mean you saw it.
No’m. You saw me see it, but you ain’t seen me saw it.
An old farmer of Arkansas, whose sons had all grown up and left him, hired a young man by the name of Esau Buck to help him on his farm. On the evening of the first day they hauled up a small load of poles for wood, and unloaded them. The next morning the old man said to the hired man—
Esau, I’m going to town today, and while I am gone you may saw wood and keep the old ram out of the garden.
When the old man had gone, Esau went out to saw the wood, but when he saw the saw he wouldn’t saw. When Esau saw the saw he couldn’t saw with that saw. Esau looked around for another saw, but that was the only saw he saw, so he didn’t saw. When the old man came home he said to Esau—
Esau, did you saw the wood?
Esau said—I saw the wood, but I wouldn’t saw it.
The old man went out to see the saw, and when he saw the saw he saw that Esau couldn’t saw with that saw. When Esau saw that the old man saw that he couldn’t saw with the saw, Esau picked up the ax and chopped up the wood and made a seesaw.
The next day the old man went to town and bought a new buck-saw for Esau Buck, and when he came home he hung the buck-saw for Esau Buck on the saw-buck by the seesaw.
Just at that time Esau Buck saw the old buck in the garden eating cabbage, and when driving him from the garden to the barn-yard Esau Buck saw the buck-saw on the saw-buck by the seesaw.
When the old buck saw Esau Buck looking at the new buck-saw on the saw-buck by the seesaw, he made a dive for Esau, hit the seesaw, knocked the seesaw against Esau Buck, who fell on the buck-saw on the saw-buck by the seesaw.
When the old man saw the old buck dive at Esau Buck, and miss Esau and hit the seesaw and knock the seesaw against Esau, and Esau Buck fall on the buck-saw on the saw-buck by the seesaw, he picked up an ax to kill the old buck. But the buck saw him coming and dodged the blow and countered on the old man’s stomach, knocked the old man over the seesaw onto Esau Buck, who was getting the seesaw, crippled Esau Buck, broke the buck-saw and the saw-buck and the seesaw.
A Yale student is reported to be responsible for the following alliteration—
Bill had a billboard. Bill also had a board bill. The board bill bored Bill so that Bill sold the bill board to pay the board bill. So after Bill sold the bill board to pay his board bill the board bill no longer bored Bill.
It is said that with little practice on either exercise a salesman will so loosen his tongue and grease his vocal organs that he can sell Russian bonds to a Japanese.