His fortune easy, and his air serene;
Deist and atheist call’d; for few agreed
What were his notions, principles, or creed;
His mind reposed not, for he hated rest,
But all things made a query or a jest;
Perplex’d himself, he ever sought to prove
That man is doom’d in endless doubt to rove;
Himself in darkness he profess’d to be,
And would maintain that not a man could see.
The youthful Friend, dissentient, reason’d still
Of the soul’s prowess, and the subject-will;
Of virtue’s beauty, and of honour’s force,
And a warm zeal gave life to his discourse:
Since from his feelings all his fire arose,
And he had interest in the themes he chose.
The Friend, indulging a sarcastic smile,
Said, “Dear enthusiast! thou wilt change thy style,
When man’s delusions, errors, crimes, deceit,
No more distress thee, and no longer cheat.”
Yet, lo! this cautious man, so coolly wise,
On a young Beauty fix’d unguarded eyes;
And her he married: Edward at the view
Bade to his cheerful visits long adieu;
But haply err’d, for this engaging bride
No mirth suppress’d, but rather cause supplied:
And when she saw the friends, by reasoning long,
Confused if right, and positive if wrong,
With playful speech, and smile that spoke delight,
She made them careless both of wrong and right.
This gentle damsel gave consent to wed,
With school and school-day dinners in her head:
She now was promised choice of daintiest food,
And costly dress, that made her sovereign good;
With walks on hilly heath to banish spleen,
And summer-visits when the roads were clean.
All these she loved, to these she gave consent,
And she was married to her heart’s content.
Their manner this - the Friends together read,
Till books a cause for disputation bred;
Debate then follow’d, and the vapour’d child
Declared they argued till her head was wild;
And strange to her it was that mortal brain
Could seek the trial, or endure the pain.
Then, as the Friend reposed, the younger pair
Sat down to cards, and play’d beside his chair;
Till he, awaking, to his books applied,
Or heard the music of th’ obedient bride:
If mild the evening, in the fields they stray’d,
And their own flock with partial eye survey’d;
But oft the husband, to indulgence prone,
Resumed his book, and bade them walk alone.
“Do, my kind Edward - I must take mine ease -
Name the dear girl the planets and the trees:
Tell her what warblers pour their evening song,
What insects flutter, as you walk along;
Teach her to fix the roving thoughts, to bind
The wandering sense, and methodize the mind.”
This was obey’d; and oft when this was done,
They calmly gazed on the declining sun;
In silence saw the glowing landscape fade,
Or, sitting, sang beneath the arbour’s shade:
Till rose the moon, and on each youthful face
Shed a soft beauty and a dangerous grace.
When the young Wife beheld in long debate
Tho friends, all careless as she seeming sate,
It soon appear’d there was in one combined
The nobler person and the richer mind:
He wore no wig, no grisly beard was seen,
And none beheld him careless or unclean,
Or watch’d him sleeping. We indeed have heard
Of sleeping beauty, and it has appear’d;
’Tis seen in infants - there indeed we find
The features soften’d by the slumbering mind;
But other beauties, when disposed to sleep,
Should from the eye of keen inspector keep:
The lovely nymph who would her swain surprise,
May close her mouth, but not conceal her eyes;
Sleep from the fairest face some beauty takes,
And all the homely features homelier makes:
So thought our wife, beholding with a sigh
Her sleeping spouse, and Edward smiling by.
A sick relation for the husband sent;
Without delay the friendly sceptic went;
Nor fear’d the youthful pair, for he had seen
The wife untroubled, and the friend serene;
No selfish purpose in his roving eyes,
No vile deception in her fond replies:
So judged the husband, and with judgment true,
For neither yet the guilt or danger knew.
What now remain’d? but they again should play
Th’ accustom’d game, and walk th’ accustom’d way;
With careless freedom should converse or read,
And the Friend’s absence neither fear nor heed:
But rather now they seem’d confused, constrain’d;
Within their room still restless they remain’d,
And painfully they felt, and knew each other pain’d.
Ah, foolish men! how could ye thus depend,
One on himself, the other on his friend?
The Youth with troubled eye the lady saw,
Yet felt too brave, too daring to withdraw;
While she, with tuneless hand the jarring keys
Touching, was not one moment at her ease:
Now would she walk, and call her friendly guide,
Now speak of rain, and cast her cloak aside;
Seize on a book, unconscious what she read,
And restless still to new resources fled;
Then laugh’d aloud, then tried to look serene;
And ever changed, and every change was seen.
Painful it is to dwell on deeds of shame -
The trying day was past, another came;
The third was all remorse, confusion, dread,
And (all too late!) the fallen hero fled.
Then felt the Youth, in that seducing time,
How feebly Honour guards the heart from crime:
Small is his native strength; man needs the stay,
The strength imparted in the trying day;
For all that Honour brings against the force
Of headlong passion, aids its rapid course;
Its slight resistance but provokes the fire,
As wood-work stops the flame, and then conveys it higher.
The Husband came; a wife by guilt made bold
Had, meeting, soothed him, as in days of old;
But soon this fact transpired; her strong distress,
And his Friend’s absence, left him nought to guess.
Still cool, though grieved, thus prudence bade him write -
“I cannot pardon, and I will not fight;
Thou art too poor a culprit for the laws,
And I too faulty to support my cause:
All must be punish’d; I must sigh alone,
At home thy victim for her guilt atone;
And thou, unhappy! virtuous now no more,
Must loss of fame, peace, purity deplore;
Sinners with praise will pierce thee to the heart,
And saints, deriding, tell thee what thou art.”
Such was his fall; and Edward, from that time,
Felt in full force the censure and the crime -
Despised, ashamed; his noble views before,
And his proud thoughts, degraded him the more:
Should he repent - would that conceal his shame?
Could peace be his? It perish’d with his fame:
Himself he scorn’d, nor could his crime forgive;
He fear’d to die, yet felt ashamed to live:
Grieved, but not contrite, was his heart; oppress’d,
Not broken; not converted, but distress’d;
He wanted will to bend the stubborn knee,
He wanted light the cause of ill to see,
To learn how frail is man, how humble then should be;
For faith he had not, or a faith too weak
To gain the help that humble sinners seek;
Else had he pray’d - to an offended God
His tears had flown a penitential flood;
Though far astray, he would have heard the call
Of mercy - “Come! return, thou prodigal:”
Then, though confused, distress’d, ashamed, afraid,
Still had the trembling penitent obey’d;
Though faith had fainted, when assail’d by fear,
Hope to the soul had whisper’d, “Persevere!”
Till in his Father’s house, an humbled guest,
He would have found forgiveness, comfort, rest.
But all this joy was to our Youth denied
By his fierce passions and his daring pride;
And shame and doubt impell’d him in a course,
Once so abhorr’d, with unresisted force,
Proud minds and guilty, whom their crimes oppress,
Fly to new crimes for comfort and redress;
So found our fallen Youth a short relief
In wine, the opiate guilt applies to grief, -
From fleeting mirth that o’er the bottle lives,
From the false joy its inspiration gives, -
And from associates pleased to find a friend
With powers to lead them, gladden, and defend,
In all those scenes where transient ease is found,
For minds whom sins oppress and sorrows wound.
Wine is like anger; for it makes us strong,
Blind, and impatient, and it leads us wrong;
The strength is quickly lost, we feel the error long:
Thus led, thus strengthen’d, in an evil cause,
For folly pleading, sought the Youth applause;
Sad for a time, then eloquently wild,
He gaily spoke as his companions smiled;
Lightly he rose, and with his former grace
Proposed some doubt, and argued on the case;
Fate and foreknowledge were his favourite themes -
How vain man’s purpose, how absurd his schemes:
“Whatever is, was ere our birth decreed;
We think our actions from ourselves proceed,
And idly we lament th’ inevitable deed;
It seems our own, but there’s a power above
Directs the motion, nay, that makes us move;
Nor good nor evil can you beings name,
Who are but rooks and castles in the game;
Superior natures with their puppets play,
Till, bagg’d or buried, all are swept away.”
Such were the notions of a mind to ill
Now prone, but ardent and determined still:
Of joy now eager, as before of fame,
And screen’d by folly when assail’d by shame,
Deeply he sank; obey’d each passion’s call,
And used his reason to defend them all.
Shall I proceed, and step by step relate
The odious progress of a Sinner’s fate?
No - let me rather hasten to the time
(Sure to arrive!) when misery waits on crime.
With Virtue, prudence fled; what Shore possessed
Was sold, was spent, and he was now distressed:
And Want, unwelcome stranger, pale and wan,
Met with her haggard looks the hurried man:
His pride felt keenly what he must expect
From useless pity and from cold neglect.
Struck by new terrors, from his friends he fled,
And wept his woes upon a restless bed;
Retiring late, at early hour to rise,
With shrunken features, and with bloodshot eyes:
If sleep one moment closed the dismal view,
Fancy her terrors built upon the true:
And night and day had their alternate woes,
That baffled pleasure, and that mock’d repose;
Till to despair and anguish was consign’d
The wreck and ruin of a noble mind.
Now seized for debt, and lodged within a jail,
He tried his friendships, and he found them fail;
Then fail’d his spirits, and his thoughts were all
Fix’d on his sins, his sufferings, and his fall:
His ruffled mind was pictured in his face,
Once the fair seat of dignity and grace:
Great was the danger of a man so prone
To think of madness, and to think alone;
Yet pride still lived, and struggled to sustain
The drooping spirit and the roving brain;
But this too fail’d: a Friend his freedom gave,
And sent him help the threat’ning world to brave;
Gave solid counsel what to seek or flee,
But still would stranger to his person be:
In vain! the truth determined to explore,
He traced the Friend whom he had wrong’d before.
This was too much; both aided and advised
By one who shunn’d him, pitied, and despised:
He bore it not; ’twas a deciding stroke,
And on his reason like a torrent broke:
In dreadful stillness he appear’d a while,
With vacant horror and a ghastly smile;
Then rose at once into the frantic rage,
That force controlled not, nor could love assuage.
Friends now appear’d, but in the Man was seen
The angry Maniac, with vindictive mien;
Too late their pity gave to care and skill
The hurried mind and ever-wandering will:
Unnoticed pass’d all time, and not a ray
Of reason broke on his benighted way;
But now he spurn’d the straw in pure disdain,
And now laugh’d loudly at the clinking chain.
Then, as its wrath subsided by degrees,
The mind sank slowly to infantine ease,
To playful folly, and to causeless joy,
Speech without aim, and without end, employ;
He drew fantastic figures on the wall,
And gave some wild relation of them all;
With brutal shape he join’d the human face,
And idiot smiles approved the motley race.
Harmless at length th’ unhappy man was found,
The spirit settled, but the reason drown’d;
And all the dreadful tempest died away