The Project Gutenberg eBook ofThe Absurd ABCThis ebook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this ebook or online atwww.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook.Title: The Absurd ABCAuthor: Walter CraneRelease date: December 11, 2005 [eBook #17283]Most recently updated: December 13, 2020Language: EnglishCredits: Produced by Suzanne Shell, Christine D and the OnlineDistributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE ABSURD ABC ***
This ebook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this ebook or online atwww.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook.
Title: The Absurd ABCAuthor: Walter CraneRelease date: December 11, 2005 [eBook #17283]Most recently updated: December 13, 2020Language: EnglishCredits: Produced by Suzanne Shell, Christine D and the OnlineDistributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
Title: The Absurd ABC
Author: Walter Crane
Author: Walter Crane
Release date: December 11, 2005 [eBook #17283]Most recently updated: December 13, 2020
Language: English
Credits: Produced by Suzanne Shell, Christine D and the OnlineDistributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE ABSURD ABC ***
Crest
The absurd ABC originally published 1874.
ABCD
A for the APPLEor Alphabet pie,Which all get a slice of.Come taste it & try.B is the BABYwho gave Mr BuntingFull many a long day'srabbit skin hunting.C for the CATthat played on the fiddle,When cows jumped higher than'Heigh Diddle Diddle!'D for the DAMEwith her pig at the stile,'Tis said they got over,but not yet a while.
A for the APPLEor Alphabet pie,Which all get a slice of.Come taste it & try.
A for the APPLEor Alphabet pie,Which all get a slice of.Come taste it & try.
B is the BABYwho gave Mr BuntingFull many a long day'srabbit skin hunting.
B is the BABYwho gave Mr BuntingFull many a long day'srabbit skin hunting.
C for the CATthat played on the fiddle,When cows jumped higher than'Heigh Diddle Diddle!'
C for the CATthat played on the fiddle,When cows jumped higher than'Heigh Diddle Diddle!'
D for the DAMEwith her pig at the stile,'Tis said they got over,but not yet a while.
D for the DAMEwith her pig at the stile,'Tis said they got over,but not yet a while.
EFG
E for the Englishman,ready to make fastThe giant who wanted tohave him for breakfast.F for the Frog in the storyyou know,Begun with a wooing butending in woe.G for Goosey Ganderwho wandered upstairs,And met the old manwho objected to prayers.
E for the Englishman,ready to make fastThe giant who wanted tohave him for breakfast.
E for the Englishman,ready to make fastThe giant who wanted tohave him for breakfast.
F for the Frog in the storyyou know,Begun with a wooing butending in woe.
F for the Frog in the storyyou know,Begun with a wooing butending in woe.
G for Goosey Ganderwho wandered upstairs,And met the old manwho objected to prayers.
G for Goosey Ganderwho wandered upstairs,And met the old manwho objected to prayers.
HIJ
H for poor Humpty whoafter his fall,Felt obliged to resign hisseat on the wall.I for the Inn where theywouldn't give beer,To one with too muchand no money, I fear.J does for poor Jack andalso for Jill,Who had so disastrousa tumble down hill.
H for poor Humpty whoafter his fall,Felt obliged to resign hisseat on the wall.
H for poor Humpty whoafter his fall,Felt obliged to resign hisseat on the wall.
I for the Inn where theywouldn't give beer,To one with too muchand no money, I fear.
I for the Inn where theywouldn't give beer,To one with too muchand no money, I fear.
J does for poor Jack andalso for Jill,Who had so disastrousa tumble down hill.
J does for poor Jack andalso for Jill,Who had so disastrousa tumble down hill.
KLMNOP
K for calm Kitty, at dinnerwho sat,While all the good folkswatched the dog & the cat.L for Little man, gun andbullets complete,Who shot the poor duck, andwas proud of the feat.M for Miss Muffet, withthat horrid spider,Just dropped into tea anda chat beside her.N for the Numerous childrenthey whoWere often too much fortheir mother in Shoe.O the Old person thatcobwebs did spy,And went up to sweep 'emOh ever so high!P for the Pie made ofblackbirds to sing,A song fit for suppera dish for a king.
K for calm Kitty, at dinnerwho sat,While all the good folkswatched the dog & the cat.
K for calm Kitty, at dinnerwho sat,While all the good folkswatched the dog & the cat.
L for Little man, gun andbullets complete,Who shot the poor duck, andwas proud of the feat.
L for Little man, gun andbullets complete,Who shot the poor duck, andwas proud of the feat.
M for Miss Muffet, withthat horrid spider,Just dropped into tea anda chat beside her.
M for Miss Muffet, withthat horrid spider,Just dropped into tea anda chat beside her.
N for the Numerous childrenthey whoWere often too much fortheir mother in Shoe.
N for the Numerous childrenthey whoWere often too much fortheir mother in Shoe.
O the Old person thatcobwebs did spy,And went up to sweep 'emOh ever so high!
O the Old person thatcobwebs did spy,And went up to sweep 'emOh ever so high!
P for the Pie made ofblackbirds to sing,A song fit for suppera dish for a king.
P for the Pie made ofblackbirds to sing,A song fit for suppera dish for a king.
QRS
Q for Queen Annewho sat in the sunTill she, more than the lilyresembled the bunR stands for Richard &Robert, those menWho didn't get up onefine morning till ten!S for the Snail that showedwonderful fight,Putting no less than twenty-fourtailors to flight!
Q for Queen Annewho sat in the sunTill she, more than the lilyresembled the bun
Q for Queen Annewho sat in the sunTill she, more than the lilyresembled the bun
R stands for Richard &Robert, those menWho didn't get up onefine morning till ten!
R stands for Richard &Robert, those menWho didn't get up onefine morning till ten!
S for the Snail that showedwonderful fight,Putting no less than twenty-fourtailors to flight!
S for the Snail that showedwonderful fight,Putting no less than twenty-fourtailors to flight!
TUV
T stands for Tom, the son ofthe piper,May his principles changeas his years grow riper.U for the Unicorn, keepinghis eye onThe coveted crown, and'ts counsel the Lion.V for the Victuals, includingthe drink,The old woman lived onsurprising to think!
T stands for Tom, the son ofthe piper,May his principles changeas his years grow riper.
T stands for Tom, the son ofthe piper,May his principles changeas his years grow riper.
U for the Unicorn, keepinghis eye onThe coveted crown, and'ts counsel the Lion.
U for the Unicorn, keepinghis eye onThe coveted crown, and'ts counsel the Lion.
V for the Victuals, includingthe drink,The old woman lived onsurprising to think!
V for the Victuals, includingthe drink,The old woman lived onsurprising to think!
WXYZ
W for the WOMANwho not over nice,Made very short workof the three blind mice.X is the Xthat is found upon buns,Which, daughters not liking,may come in for sons.Y for Yankee Doodleof ancient renown,Both he & his ponythat took him to town.Z for the Zany wholooked like a fool,For when he was younghe neglected his school.
W for the WOMANwho not over nice,Made very short workof the three blind mice.
W for the WOMANwho not over nice,Made very short workof the three blind mice.
X is the Xthat is found upon buns,Which, daughters not liking,may come in for sons.
X is the Xthat is found upon buns,Which, daughters not liking,may come in for sons.
Y for Yankee Doodleof ancient renown,Both he & his ponythat took him to town.
Y for Yankee Doodleof ancient renown,Both he & his ponythat took him to town.
Z for the Zany wholooked like a fool,For when he was younghe neglected his school.
Z for the Zany wholooked like a fool,For when he was younghe neglected his school.
AtoM
NtoZ