Chap. xiii.: OF SIMPLICISSIMUS' STRANGE FANCIES AND CASTLES IN THE AIR, AND HOW HE GUARDED HIS TREASURE
Now they that know the worth of money, and therefore take it for their god, have no little reason on their side; for if there be a man in the world that hath experienced its powers and wellnigh divine virtues, that man am I. For I know how a man fares that hath a fair provision thereof; yet have I never yet known how he should feel that had never a farthing in his pouch. Yea, I could even take upon me to prove that this same money possesses all virtues and powers more than any precious stones; for it can drive away all melancholia like the diamond: it causeth love and inclination to study, like the emerald (for so comes it that commonly students have more money than poor folk's children): it taketh away fear and maketh man joyful and happy like unto the ruby: 'tis often an hindrance to sleep, like the garnet: on the other hand, it hath great power to produce repose of mind and so sleep, like the jacinth: it strengtheneth the heart and maketh a man jolly and companionable, lively and kind, like the sapphire and amethyst: it driveth away bad dreams, giveth joy, sharpeneth the understanding, and if one have a plaint against another it gaineth him the victory, like the sardius (and in especial if the judge's palm be first well oiled therewith): it quencheth unchaste desire, for by means of gold one can possess fair women: and in a word, 'tis not to be exprest what gold can do, as I have before set forth in my book intituled "Black and White," if any man know how rightly to use and employ this information. As to mine own money that I had then brought together, both with robbery and the finding of this treasure, it had a special power of its own: for first of all it made me prouder than I was before, so much so that it vexed me to the heart that I must still be called "Simplicissimus" only. It spoiled my sleep like the amethyst: for many a night I lay awake and did speculate how I could put it out to advantage and get more to put to it. Yea, and it made me a most perfect reckoner, for I must calculate what mine uncoined silver and gold might be worth, and adding this to that which I had borrowed here and there, and which yet was in my purse, I found without the precious stones a fine overplus. Yet did my money prove to me its inborn roguery and evil inclination to temptation, inasmuch as it did fully expound to me the proverb "He that hath much will ever have more," and made me so miserly that any man might well have hated me. From my money I got many foolish plans and strange fancies in my brain, and yet could follow out no conceit of all that I devised. At one time I thought I would leave the wars and betake myself somewhither and spend my days in fatness a-looking out of the window; but quickly I did repent me of that, and in especial because I considered what a free life I now led and what hopes I had to become a great Jack. And then my thought was this, "Up and away, Simplicissimus, and get thyself made a nobleman and raise thine own company of dragoons for the emperor at thine own cost: and presently thou art a perfected young lord that with the times can rise yet higher." Yet as soon as I reflected that this my greatness could be made small by any unlucky engagement, or be ended by a peace that should bring the war soon to a finish, I could not find this plan to my taste. So then I began to wish I had my full age as a man: for hadst thou that, said I to myself, thou couldst take a rich young wife, and so buy thee a nobleman's estate somewhere and lead a peaceful life. There would I betake myself to the rearing of cattle and enjoy my sufficiency to the full: yet as I knew I was too young for this, I must let that plan go by the board also.
Such and the like conceits had I many, till at last I resolved to give over my best effects to some man of substance in some safe town to keep, and to wait how fortune would further deal with me. Now at that time I had my Jupiter still with me: for indeed I could not be rid of him: and at times the man could talk most reasonably and for weeks together would be sane and sober: but above all things he held me dear for my goodness to him; and seeing me in deep thought he says to me, "Dear son, give away your blood-money; gold, silver, and all." "And why?" said I, "dear Jupiter?" "Oh," says he, "to get you friends and be rid of your useless cares." To which I answered, "I would fain have more of such." Then says he, "Get more: but in such fashion will ye never in your life have more friends nor more peace: leave it to old misers to be greedy, but do ye so behave as becomes a fine young lad: for ye shall sooner lack good friends than good money."
So I pondered on the matter, and found that Jupiter reasoned well of the case: yet greed had such hold on me that I could not resolve to give away aught. Yet I did at last present to the commandant a pair of silver-gilt double tankards and to my captain a couple of silver salt-cellars, by which I achieved nothing more than to make their mouths water for the rest: for these were rare pieces of antiquity. My true comrade Jump-i'-th'-field I rewarded with twelve rix-dollars; who in return advised me I should either make away with my riches or else expect to fall into misfortune by their means: for, said he, it liked the officers not that a common soldier should have more money than they: and he himself had known this: that one comrade should secretly murder another for the sake of money: till now, said he, I had been able to keep secret what I had gotten in booty, for all believed I had spent it on clothes, horses, and arms: but now I could conceal nought nor make folks believe I had no secret store of money: for each one made out the treasure I had found to be greater than it was: and yet I spent not so much as before. Nor could he help but hear what rumours went about among the men: and were he in my place he would let wars be wars: would settle himself in safety somewhere, and let our Lord God rule the world as He will. But I answered, "Harkye, brother, how can I throw to the winds my hopes of an ensigncy?" "Yea, yea," says Jump-i'-th'-field, "but devil take me if thou ever get thine ensigncy. The others that wait for it would help to break thy neck a thousand times over if they saw that such a post was vacant and thou to have it. Teach me not how to know salmon from trout, for my father was a fisherman! And be not angry with me, brother, for I have seen how it fares in war longer than thou. Seest thou not how many a sergeant grows grey with his spontoon that deserved to have a company before many others. Thinkest thou they are not fellows that have some right to hope? And indeed they have more right to such promotion than thou, as thou thyself must confess." Nor could I answer aught, for Jump-i'-th'-field did but speak the truth from an honest German heart, and flattered me not: yet must I bite my lip in secret: for I thought at that time mighty well of myself. Yet I weighed this speech and that of my Jupiter full carefully, and considered that I had no single natural-born friend that would help me in straits or would revenge my death open or secret. And I myself could see plain enough how it stood with me: yet neither my desire of honour nor of money would leave me: and still less my hope to become great, to leave the wars, and to be in peace; nay, rather I held to my first plan; and when a chance offered for Cologne, whither I, with some hundred dragoons, was ordered to convoy certain carriers and waggons of merchandise from Münster, I packed up my treasure, took it with me, and gave it in charge to one of the first merchants of that city to be drawn out on production of an exact list of the things. Now it was seventy-four marks of uncoined silver, fifteen marks of gold, eighty Joachim dollars, and in a sealed casquet divers rings and jewels, which, with gold and precious stones, weighed eight and a half pounds in all, together with 893 ancient golden coins that were worth each a gold gulden and a half. With me I took my Jupiter, as he desired it, and had kinsfolk of repute in Cologne: to whom he boasted of the good turns I had done him and caused me to be received of them with great honour. Yet did he never cease to counsel me that I should bestow my money better and buy myself friends that would be of more service to me than money in my purse.
Chap. xiv.: HOW THE HUNTSMAN WAS CAPTURED BY THE ENEMY
So on the journey home I pondered much how I should carry myself in future, so that I might get the favour of all: for Jump-i'-th'-field had put a troublesome flea in my ear, and had made me to believe I was envied of all: and in truth 'twas no otherwise. And now came into my mind what the famous prophetess of Soest had once said,[24]and so I burdened myself with yet greater cares. Yet with these thoughts did I sharpen my wit, and perceived that a man that should live without cares would be dull as any beast. Then I considered for what reason one and the other might hate me, and how I might deal with each to have his goodwill again, yet most of all must I wonder how men could be so false and yet give me nought but good words whereas they loved me not. For that cause I determined to deal as others did, and to say what would please each, yea, to approach every man with respect though I felt it not: for most of all I felt 'twas mine own pride had burdened me with the most enemies. Therefore I held it needful to shew myself humble again, though I was not, and to consort again with common folk, but to approach my betters hat in hand and to refrain from all finery in dress till my rank should be bettered. From the merchant in Cologne I had drawn 100 dollars, to repay the same with interest when he should return my treasure: these hundred dollars I was minded to spend on the way for the behoof of the escort, as now perceiving that greed makes no friends, and therefore was resolved on this very journey to alter my ways and make a new beginning. Yet did I reckon without mine host; for as we would pass through the duchy of Berg there waited for us in a post of vantage eighty musqueteers and fifty troopers, even when I was ordered forward with four others and a corporal to ride in front and to spy out the road. So the enemy kept quiet when we came into the ambush and let us pass, lest if they had attacked us the convoy should be warned before they came into the pass where they were: but after us they sent a cornet and eight troopers that kept us in sight till their people had attacked our escort itself, and we turned round to protect the waggons: at which they rode down upon us and asked, would we have quarter. Now for my part I was well mounted: for I had my best horse under me: yet would I not run, but rode up a little hillock to see if honour was to be had by fighting. Yet I was presently aware, by the noise of the volley that our people received, what o'clock it was, and so disposed myself to flight. But the cornet had thought of all, and already cut off our retreat, and as I was preparing to cut my way through he once again offered me quarter, for he thought me an officer. So I considered that to make sure of one's life is better than an uncertain hazard, and therefore asked, would he keep his promise of quarter as an honest soldier: he answered, "Yes, honestly." So I presented him my sword and rendered myself up a prisoner. At once he asked me of what condition I was: for he took me for a nobleman and therefore an officer. But when I answered him, I was called the Huntsman of Soest, "Then art thou lucky," says he, "that thou didst not fall into our hands a month ago: for then could I have given thee no quarter, since then thou wast commonly held among our people for a declared sorcerer."
This cornet was a fine young cavalier and not more than two years older than I, and was mightily proud to have the honour of taking the famous huntsman: therefore he observed the promised quarter very honourably and in Dutch fashion, which is to take from their Spanish prisoners of war nothing that they carry under their belt: nay, he did not even have me searched; but I had wit enough to take the money out of my pockets and present it to him when they came to a division of spoils; and also I told the cornet secretly to look to it that he got as his share my horse, saddle, and harness, for he would find thirty ducats in the saddle, and the horse had hardly his equal anywhere. And for this cause the cornet was as much my friend as if I had been his own brother: for at once he mounted my horse and set me on his own. But of the escort no more than six were dead, and thirteen prisoners, of whom eight were wounded: the rest fled and had not heart enough to retake the booty from the enemy in fair field, the which they could have done, as being all mounted men against infantry.
Now when the plunder and the prisoners had been shared, the Swedes and Hessians (for they were from different garrisons) separated the same evening. But the cornet kept me and the corporal, together with three other dragoons, as his share because he had captured us: and so were we brought to a fortress which lay but a few miles from our own garrison.[25]And inasmuch as I had raised plenty of smoke in that town before, my name was there well known and I myself more feared than loved. So when we had the place in sight the cornet sent a trooper in advance to announce his coming to the commandant, and to tell him how he had fared and who the prisoners were, whereat there was a concourse in the town that was not to be described, for each would fain see the huntsman. One said this of me, and another that; and the sight was for all the world as if some great potentate had made his entry. But we prisoners were brought straight to the commandant, who was much amazed at my youth; and asked, had I never served on the Swedish side, and of what country I was: and when I told him the truth he would know if I had no desire to serve again on their side. I answered him that in other respects 'twas to me indifferent: but that I had sworn an oath to the emperor and therefore methought 'twas my duty to keep such. Thereupon he ordered us to be taken to the prize-master, but allowed the cornet, at his request, to treat us as his guests, because I had before so treated mine own prisoners and among them his own brother. So when evening was come there was a gathering both of soldiers of fortune and cavaliers of birth at the cornet's quarters, who sent for me and the corporal: and there was I, to speak the truth, extraordinary courteously entreated by them. I made merry as if I had lost nothing, and carried myself as confidently and open-hearted as I had been no prisoner in the hands of my enemy but among my best friends. Yet I shewed myself as modest as might be; for I could well imagine that my behaviour would be noted to the commandant, which was so, as I afterwards learned.
Next day we prisoners, one after another, were brought before the regimental judge-advocate-general, who examined us, the corporal first, and me second. But as soon as I entered the room he was filled with wonder at my youth, and to cast it in my teeth, "My child," says he, "what have the Swedes done to thee that thou shouldst fight against them?"
Now this angered me: for I had seen as young soldiers among them as I was: so I answered, "The Swedes had robbed me of my coral and bells and my baby's rattle, and I would have them back." And as I thus paid him back in his own coin, the officers that sat by him were shamed, insomuch that one of them began to say to him in Latin he should treat me seriously, for he could hear that it was no child that he had before him. In that I was ware that his name was Eusebius; for the officer so addressed him. So presently when he had asked my name, and I had told him, "There is no devil in hell," says he, "that is called Simplicissimus." "Nay," answered I, "and 'tis like there is none named Eusebius." And so I paid him back like our old muster-clerk Cyriack; yet this pleased not the officers, who bade me remember I was their prisoner, and was not brought there to pass jests. At this reproof I blushed not, but answered: inasmuch as they held me prisoner like a soldier, and would not let me run away like a child, I had taken care that they should not make sport with me as with a child: as I had been questioned, so had I answered and hoped I had done no wrong therein. So they asked me of my country and my family, but especially if I had never served on the Swedish side: item, how it was with the garrison of Soest: how strong it was, and all the rest. To all which I answered quick and short and well, and in respect of Soest and its garrison as much as I could confidently state: yet I might well keep silence concerning my life as a jester, for of this I was ashamed.
Chap. xv.: ON WHAT CONDITION THE HUNTSMAN WAS SET FREE
Meanwhile 'twas known at Soest how it had fared with the convoy, how I and the corporal had been captured and whither we had been taken; and therefore next day came a drummer to fetch us back: whereupon the corporal and the three others were delivered up, together with a letter to the following purport (for the commandant sent it to me to read):
"Monsieur, etc.,--By the bearer, your tambour, your message hath been delivered: and in answer thereto I restore herewith, in return for ransom received, the corporal and the three other prisoners: but as concerns Simplicissimus, called the Huntsman, the same cannot be allowed to return, as having once served on this side. But if I can serve your honour in any matters short of those touching my allegiance, you have in me a willing servant, and as such I remain,
"Your honour's obedient servant,
"[DANIEL] DE S[AINT] A[NDRÉ]."[26]
Now this letter did not half please me, yet I must return thanks to him for suffering me to see it. But when I asked to speak with the commandant I received answer he would himself send for me as soon as he had despatched the drummer, which should be done next morning: till then I must be patient.
So when I had waited the appointed time, the commandant sent for me, and that just at dinner-time, and then for the first time the honour fell to me of sitting at table with him. And so long as the meal lasted he drank to my health and said no word, great or small, of the business he had with me; nor was it my part to begin. But the meal now ended and I being somewhat fuddled, says he, "My friend the Huntsman, ye will have understood from my letter under what pretext I have kept ye here: and indeed I intend no wrong or anything contrary to reason and the usage of war, for yourself have confessed to me and the judge-advocate that you once served on our side in the main army, and therefore must resolve yourself to take service under my command. And in time, if ye behave yourself well, I will so advance you as ye could never have hoped for among the Imperials, otherwise ye must not take it ill if I send you to that lieutenant-colonel from whom the dragoons before captured you." To which I answered, "Worshipful colonel" (for at that time 'twas not the usage that soldiers of fortune were entitled "your honour" even though they were colonels), "I hope, since I am bound by oath neither to the crown of Sweden nor its confederates, and still less to that lieutenant-colonel, that I am therefore not bound to take service with the Swedes and so to break the oath which I swore to the emperor, and therefore beg the worshipful colonel with all humility to be good enough to relieve me from such a proposal." "How?" says the colonel, "do ye despise the Swedish service? I would have you to know ye are my prisoner, and sooner than let you go to Soest to do the enemy service I will bring you to another trial, or let you rot in prison." And so, said he, I might lay my account.
Truly at these words I was afeared, yet would not yet give in, but answered, God would protect me both from such despiteful treatment and from perjury: for the rest, I persisted in my humble hope that the colonel would, according to his known reputation, deal with me as with a soldier. "Yea," said he, "I know well how I could treat ye if I would be strict; but be ye better advised, lest I find cause to shew you other countenance." And with that I was led back to the prison.
And now can any man easily guess that I slept not much that night, but had all manner of thoughts: and next morning came certain officers with the cornet that had taken me, under colour of passing the time, but in truth to tell me that the colonel was minded to have me tried as a sorcerer if I would not otherwise be content. So would they have terrified me, and found out what my powers were: yet as I had the comfort of a good conscience, I took all coolly and said but little, as seeing well that the colonel cared for nothing but this: that he would fain have me no more at Soest. And well might he suppose that if he once let me go I should not leave that place, where I hoped for promotion, and moreover had two fine horses there and other things of price. Next day he had me brought to him again and asked, had I resolved otherwise. So I answered, "Colonel, to this I am determined, that I will sooner die than be perjured. Yet if the worshipful colonel will set me free and be pleased not to call upon me to do any warlike service, then will I promise him with heart, mouth, and hand to bear and use no arms against the Swedes and Hessians for the space of six months."
To that he agreed at once, gave me his hand upon it, and forgave me my ransom; further, he commanded his secretary to draw up an agreement to that effect in duplicate, which we both subscribed, wherein he promised me protection and all freedom so long as I should remain in the fortress entrusted to him. On the other hand, I bound myself to the two points above named, videlicet: that I, so long as I should sojourn in the said fortress, would neither undertake anything to the hurt of the garrison and its commander, nor would conceal aught that was intended to their prejudice and damage, but would much more further their profit and benefit, and prevent any damage to them to the best of my ability--yea, that if the place were attacked I should and would help to defend it.
Thereupon he kept me to dine with him again, and shewed me more honour than I could in all my lifetime have looked for from the Imperials: and so by little and little he won me over, till I would not have returned to Soest even if he had let me go thither and had accounted me free from my promise.
Chap. xvi.: HOW SIMPLICISSIMUS BECAME A NOBLEMAN
When a thing is to be, all things shape themselves to that end. Now did I conceive that fortune had taken me to husband, or at least bound herself so close to me that the most contrary happenings must turn out to my profit: as when I learned at the commandant's table that my servant with my two fine horses had come from Soest. But I knew not (what at last I found) that tricky Fortune hath the sirens' art, who do shew themselves kindest to those to whom they wish most harm, and so doth raise a man the higher but for this end: to cast him down the deeper. Now this servant, which I had before captured from the Swedes, was beyond measure true to me, who had done him great kindnesses. He therefore had saddled my two horses and rode out a good way from Soest to meet the drummer that should bring me back, that not only I might not have to walk so far, but also that I might not have to return to Soest naked or in rags: for he conceived I had been stripped. So when he met the drummer and the rest of the prisoners there he had my best clothing in a pack. But when he saw me not, but understood I was kept back to take service with the adversary, he set spurs to his horse and says he, "Adieu, tambours, and you too. Corporal: where my master is there will I be also," so he escaped and came to me at the very time when the commandant had set me free and was shewing me such great honour: who thereupon bestowed my horses in an inn till I could find for myself a lodging to my liking, and called me fortunate by reason of my servant's faith, yet wondered that I, as a common dragoon, and so young to boot, should possess such fine horses and be so well equipped; nay, when I had taken leave and would go to my inn he praised one horse so loudly that I marked well he would fain have bought him from me. Yet because from modesty he ventured not to make a bid, I said if I might beg for the honour of his keeping the horse it was at his service. But he refused roundly, more because I was fairly tipsy, and he would not have the reproach of talking a present out of a drunken man, who might thereafter repent of it, than because he would not fain have had that noble horse.
That night I did consider how I would order my life in time to come; and did decide to remain for the six months even where I was, and so in peace to spend the winter which was now at hand, for which I knew I had money enough for my purposes, without breaking into my treasure at Cologne. "In so long a time," thought I, "thou wilt be full grown and come to thy full strength, and so canst thou next spring take the field with more boldness among the emperor's troops."
Early next morning I reviewed my saddle, which was far better lined than the one I had presented to the cornet: and later on I had my horse led to the colonel's quarters and told him: as I had determined to spend the six months in which 'twas forbidden me to fight, peaceably and under the colonel's protection, here, my horses were of no use to me, which yet 'twere pity should be spoiled, and therefore begged him that he would consent to grant this charger here present a place among his own horses, and accept the same from me as a mark of grateful acknowledgment of favours received, and that without scruple. The colonel returned me thanks with great civility and very courteous offers of service, and the same afternoon sent me by his steward one fat ox alive, two fat pigs, a hogshead of wine, two hogsheads of beer, twelve cords of firewood; all which he caused to be brought to me in front of my new lodging, which I had even now hired for half a year, and sent a message: that as he saw I was to live with him, and could easily conceive that I was at first ill-provided with victual, he had therefore sent me for household use a draught of wine and a joint of meat, together with the fuel to cook the same: with this in addition, that whereinsoever he could help me he would not fail. For which I returned thanks as civilly as I could: presented the steward with two ducats, and begged him to commend me to his master.
So when I saw I had gained such credit with the colonel for my liberality, I thought to earn praise also among the common folk, that none should take me for a mere malingerer: to that end I had my servant called before me in presence of my landlord, and "Friend Nicolas," said I, "thou hast shewn me more faithfulness than any master can expect from his servant; but now, when I know not how to make it up to thee, as having no master and no leave to fight, wherefrom I might gain booty enough to reward thee as I would fain do, and in respect also of the peaceful life which I do intend henceforth to live, and therefore do need no servitor, I herewith give thee as thy pay the other horse, with saddle, harness and pistols, with the request that thou wouldst be content for the present to seek another master. And if I hereafter can serve thee in any way, do thou not fail to ask me." With that he kissed my hands and for tears could not speak, but would by no means have the horse, but held it better I should turn it into money to use for my maintenance. Yet at last I persuaded him to take it, after I had promised to take him again into my service so soon as I should need a man. At this parting my landlord was so moved that his eyes also filled with tears: and as my servant exalted me among the soldiers for this action, so did my landlord among the citizens.
As to the commandant, he held me for so determined a fellow that he would have ventured to build upon my word, since I did not only truly keep the oath I had sworn to the emperor, but in order to keep that other promise, which I had made to himself, with great strictness had rid myself of my fine horses, my arms, and my most faithful servant.
Chap. xvii.: HOW THE HUNTSMAN DISPOSED HIMSELF TO PASS HIS SIX MONTHS: AND ALSO SOMEWHAT OF THE PROPHETESS
I do think there is no man in the world that hath not a bee in his bonnet, for we be all men of one mould and by mine own fruits I can mark how others' ripen. Oh coxcomb! say you; if thou beest a fool, thinkest thou others must be too? Nay, that were to say too much: but this I maintain, that one man can hide his folly better than another. Nor is a man a fool because he hath foolish fantasies, for in youth we do all have the like: and he that lets those fantasies run loose is held to be a fool because others keep the fool concealed, and others do but shew the half of him. They that keep such whims under altogether be but peevish fellows, but they that now and then allow them (as time affords an opportunity) to shew their ears and put their heads out of window to get air lest they be choked, these I hold for the best and wisest men. Mine own fantasies I let forth only too far, as seeing myself so free and well provided with money; so that I took me a lad whom I clothed as a nobleman's page, and that in the most fantastic colours, to wit, light brown bordered with yellow, which must be my livery, for so I fancied it: and he must wait upon me as if I were a nobleman and not until just before a common dragoon; yea, and half a year before a poor horse-boy.
Now this, the first folly I committed in this town, though 'twas pretty gross, yet was remarked by none, much less blamed. But why? The world is so full of such fooleries that none marks them now, nor laughs at them, nor wonders at them, for all are used to them. And so was I held for a wise and good soldier, and not for a fool only fit for baby's shoes. Then I bargained with my landlord for the feeding of my page and myself, and gave him, as payment on account, what the commandant had presented to me, as far as concerns food and fuel: but for the drink my page must keep the key, for I was very willing to give of such to all that visited me. And since I was neither citizen nor soldier, and therefore had no equals that were bound to keep me company, I consorted with both sides, and therefore daily found comrades enough; and these I sent not away dry. Among the citizens I had most friendship with the organist, for music I loved and, without bragging, had an excellent voice which I had no mind to let rust: this man taught me how to compose, and to play better upon that instrument, as also upon the harp: on the lute I was already a master; so I got me one of mine own and daily diverted myself with it. And when I was tired of music I would send for that furrier that had instructed me in the use of all arms in Paradise, and with him exercised myself to be yet more perfect. Also I obtained leave from the commandant that one of his artillerymen should instruct me in gunnery and something of artillery-practice for a proper reward. For the rest, I kept myself quiet and retired, so that people wondered, seeing how I, that had been used to plunder and bloodshed, now sat always over my books like a student.
But my host was the commandant's spy and my keeper, for well I noted that he reported to him all my ways and works; but that suited me well enough, for of warfare I had never a thought, and if there was talk of it I behaved myself as I had never been a soldier, and was only there to perform my daily exercises, of which I but now made mention. 'Tis true I wished my six months at an end: yet could no man guess which side I would then serve. As often as I waited on the colonel he would have me to dine with him: and then at times the converse was so arranged that my intention might be known therefrom: but ever I answered so discreetly that none could know what I did mean. So once when he said to me, "How is't with ye, Huntsman? Will ye not yet turn Swede? An ensign of mine is dead yesterday," I made answer, "Worshipful colonel, seeing that it is but decent for a woman not to marry at once again after her husband's death, should I not also wait my six months?" In such fashion I escaped every time, and gained the colonel's good will more and more; so much so that he allowed me to take my walks both inside and outside the fortress: yea, at last I might hunt the hares, partridges, and birds, which was not permitted to his own soldiers. Likewise did I fish in the Lippe, and was so lucky at that, that it seemed as if I could conjure both fish and crayfish out of the water. For this I caused to be made a rough hunting-suit only, in which I crept by night into the territory of Soest and collected my hidden treasures from here and there, and brought them to the said fortress, and so behaved as if I would for ever dwell among the Swedes.
By the same way came the prophetess of Soest to me and said, "Lookye, my son, did I not counsel thee well before that thou shouldst hide thy money outside the town of Soest? I do assure thee 'tis thy greater good luck to have been captured: for hadst thou returned to Soest, certain fellows that had sworn thy death, because thou wast preferred to them among the women, would have murdered thee in thy hunting." So I asked, "How could any be jealous of me, that meddled with women not at all?" "Oh," says she, "of that opinion that thou art now, wilt thou not long remain: or the women will drive thee out of the country with mockery and shame. Thou hast ever laughed at me when I foretold thee aught: wouldest thou once more refuse to believe me if I told thee more? Dost thou not find in the place where thou art better friends than in Soest? I do swear to thee they hold thee only too dear, and that such exceeding love will turn to thy harm, if thou submit not to it." So I answered her, if she truly knew so much as she gave out, she should reveal to me how it stood with my parents and whether I should ever in my life come to them again: she should not be so dark in her sayings, but out with it in good German. Thereupon she said I might ask after my parents when my foster-father should meet me unawares, and lead my wet-nurse's daughter by a string: with that she laughed loud, and at the end said, she had of her own accord told to me more than to others that had begged it of her.
But as I began to jest upon her she quickly took herself away, after I had presented her with a few thalers; for I had more silver coin than I could easily carry, having at that time a pretty sum of money and many rings and jewels of great price: for before this, whenever I heard of precious stones among the soldiers, or found such on expeditions or elsewhere, I bought them, and that for less than half the money they were worth. Such treasures did always cry aloud to me to let them be seen in public: and I did willingly obey, for being of a pretty proud temper, I made a show with my wealth and feared not to let mine host see it, who made it out to others as greater than it was. And they did wonder whence I had gathered it all together, it being well known that I had made deposit at Cologne of the treasure I had found, for the cornet had read the merchant's receipt when he took me prisoner.
Chap. xviii.: HOW THE HUNTSMAN WENT A WOOING, AND MADE A TRADE OF IT
My intent to learn artillery practice and fencing in these six months was good, and that I knew: yet 'twas not enough to protect me from idleness, which is the root of many evils, and especially ill for me because I had no one to command me. 'Tis true I sat industriously over books of all sorts, from which I learned much good: but a few came into my hands which were as good for me as grass for a sick dog. The incomparable "Arcadia," from which I sought to learn eloquence, was the first book that led me aside from good stories to books of love and from true history to romances of chivalry. Such sort of books I collected wherever I could, and when I found one I ceased not till I had read it through, though I should sit day and night over it. But these taught me, instead of eloquence, to practise lechery. Yet was such desire at no time so violent and strong that one could, with Seneca, call it a divine frenzy or, as it is described in Thomas Thomai's "Forest Garden," a serious sickness. For where I took a fancy there I had what I desired easily and without great trouble: and so had I no cause to complain as other wooers and lechers have had, which are chock full of fantastic thoughts, troubles, desires, secret pangs, anger, jealousy, revenge, madness, tears, bragging, threats and numberless other follies, and for sheer impatience wish for death. For I had money and was not too careful of it, and besides I had a fine voice, which daily I exercised with all manner of instruments. Instead of shewing my bodily skill in the dance, which I did never love, I did display it in fencing, engaging with my furrier: moreover, I had a fine smooth face, and did practise myself in a certain gracious amiableness, so that the women, even those that I did not greatly seek after, did of themselves run after me, and that more than I desired.
About this time came Martinmas: then with us Germans begins the eating and swilling, and that feast is full conscientiously observed till Shrovetide: so was I invited to different houses, both among the officers and burghers, to help eat the Martinmas goose. So 'twas that on such occasions I made acquaintance with the ladies. For my lute and my songs made all to look my way, and when they so looked, then was I ready to add such charming looks and actions to my new love-songs (which I did myself compose) that many a fair maid was befooled, and ere she knew it was in love with me. Yet lest I should be held for a curmudgeon I gave likewise two banquets, one for the officers and one for the chief citizens, by which means I gained me favour of both parties and an entry to their houses; for I spared no expense in my entertainment. But all this was but for the sake of the sweet maids, and though I did not at once find what I sought with each and everyone (for some there were that could deny me), yet I went often to these also, that so they might bring them that did shew me more favour than becomes modest maidens into no suspicion, but might believe that I visited these last also only for the sake of conversation. And so separately I persuaded each one to believe this of the others, and to think she was the only one that enjoyed my love. Just six I had that loved me well and I them in return: yet none possessed my heart or me alone: in one 'twas but the black eyes that pleased me; in another the golden hair; in a third a winning sweetness; and in the others was also somewhat that the rest had not. But if I, besides these, also visited others, 'twas either for the cause I mentioned or because their acquaintance was new and strange to me, and in any case I refused and despised nothing, as not purposing always to remain in the same place. My page, which was an arch-rogue, had enough to do with carrying of love-letters back and forth, and knew how to keep his mouth shut and my loose ways so secret from one and the other that nought was discovered: in reward for which he had from the baggages many presents, which yet cost me most, seeing that I spent a little fortune on them, and could well say, "What is won with the drum is lost with the fife." All the same, I kept my affairs so secret that not one man in a hundred would have taken me for a rake, save only the priest, from whom I borrowed not so many good books as formerly.
Chap. xix.: BY WHAT MEANS THE HUNTSMAN MADE FRIENDS, AND HOW HE WAS MOVED BY A SERMON
When Fortune will cast a man down, she raiseth him first to the heights, and the good God doth faithfully warn every man before his fall. Such a warning had I, but would have none of it. For I was stiffly persuaded of this, that my fortune was so firmly founded that no mishap could cast me down, because all, and specially the commandant himself, wished me well; those that he valued I won over by all manner of respect: his trusted servants I brought over to my side by presents, and with them perhaps more than with mine equals I did drink "Brotherhood" and swore to them everlasting faith and friendship: so, too, the common citizens and soldiers loved me because I had a friendly word for all. "What a kindly man," said they often, "is the huntsman; He will talk with a child in the street, and hath a quarrel with no man!" If I had shot a hare or a few partridges I would send them to the kitchen of those whose friendship I sought, and also invited myself as a guest; at which time I would always have a sup of wine (which was in that place very dear) brought thither also: yea, I would so contrive it that the whole cost would fall upon me. And when at such banquets I fell in converse with any, I had praise for all save myself, and managed so to feign humility as I had never known pride. So because I thus gained the favour of all, and all thought much of me, I never conceived that any misfortune could encounter me, especially since my purse was still pretty well filled. Often I went to the oldest priest of the town, who lent me many books from his library: and when I brought one back then would he discourse of all manner of matters with me, for we became so familiar together that one could easily bear with the other. So when not only the Martinmas goose and the feast of pudding-broth were gone and over, but also the Christmas holidays, I presented to him for the New Year a bottle of Strassburg Branntwein, the which he, after Westphalian use, liked to sip with sugar-candy, and thereafter came to visit him, even as he was a-reading my "Joseph the Chaste," which my host without my knowledge had lent him. I did blush that my work should fall into the hands of so learned a man, especially because men hold that one is best known by what he writes. But he would have me to sit by him and praised my invention, yet blamed me that I had lingered so long over the love-story of Zuleika (which was Potiphar's wife). "Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh," said he moreover, "and if my friend had not known how it fares with a wooer's heart he could never so well have treated of this woman's passion or in so lively fashion pictured it."
I answered that what I had written was not mine own invention but extracted from other books to give me some practice in writing. "Yes, yes," says he, "of course I am pleased to believe it: yet may you be sure I know more of your honour than he conceives." At these words I was dismayed and thought, "Hath a little bird told thee?" But he, seeing how I changed colour, went on to say, "Ye are lively and young, idle and handsome. Ye do live a careless life, and as I hear in all luxury: therefore do I beseech you in the Lord and exhort you to consider in what an evil case you stand: beware of the beast with the long hair, if you have any care for your happiness and health. Ye may perhaps say, 'How concerneth it the priest what I do or not?' ('Rightly guessed,' said I to myself) or, 'What right hath he to command me?' 'Tis true I have but the care of souls: but, sir, be assured that your temporal good, as that of my benefactor, is for mere Christian love as precious as if ye were mine own son. 'Tis ever a pity, and never can ye answer such a charge before your heavenly Father if ye do bury the talent He hath entrusted to you and leave to go to ruin that noble understanding which I do perceive in this your writing. My faithful and fatherly advice would be, ye should employ your youth and your means, which ye now do waste in such purposeless wise, to study, that some day ye may be helpful to God and man and yourself; and let war alone, in which, as I do hear, ye have so great a delight; and before ye get a shrewd knock and find the truth of that saying, 'Young soldiers make old beggars.'" This predication I listened to with great impatience, for I was not used to hear the like: yet I shewed not how I felt, lest I should forfeit my reputation for politeness, but thanked him much for his straightforwardness and promised him to reflect upon his advice: yet thought I within myself, what did it concern the priest how I ordered my life; for just then I was at the height of my good fortune, and I could not do without those pleasures of dalliance I had once enjoyed. So is it ever with such warnings, when youth is unaccustomed to bit and bridle, and gallops hard away to meet destruction.
Chap. xx.: HOW HE GAVE THE FAITHFUL PRIEST OTHER FISH TO FRY, TO CAUSE HIM TO FORGET HIS OWN HOGGISH LIFE