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“Not at all, Skipper Nicholas!” cries my tutor.
“Study,” says my uncle, in solemn commiseration, “is a bitter thing t’ be cotched by. Ye’re all wore out, parson, along o’ the day’s work.”
My tutor laughed.
“Too much study for the brain,” says my uncle, sympathetically, his eye on the bottle. “I ’low, parson, if I was you I’d turn in.”
Cather was unfailingly obedient.
“Dannie,” says my uncle, with reviving interest, “have he gone above?”
“He have,” says I.
“Take a look,” he whispered, “t’ see that Judy’s stowed away beyond hearin’.”
I would step into the hall––where was no nightgowned figure listening on the stair––to reassure him.
“Dannie,” says he, wickedly gleeful, “how’s the bottle?”
I would hold it up to the lamp and rattle its contents. “’Tis still stout, sir,” says I. “’Tis a wonderful bottle.”
“Stout!” cries he, delighted. “Very good.”
“Still stout,” says I; “an’ the third night!”
“Then,” says he, pushing his glass towards me, “I ’low they’s no real need o’ puttin’ me on short allowance. Be liberal, Dannie, b’y––be liberal when ye pours.”
I would be liberal.
“’Tis somehow sort o’ comfortable, lad,” says he, eying me with honest feeling, “t’ be sittin’ down here with a ol’ chum like you. ’Tis very good, indeed.”
I was glad that he thought so.
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And now I must tell that I loved Judith. ’Tis enough to say so––to write the bare words down. I’m not wanting to, to be sure: for it shames a man to speak boldly of sacred things like this. It shames a lad, it shames a maid, to expose the heart of either, save sacredly to each other. ’Tis all well enough, and most delightful, when the path is moonlit and secluded, when the warmth and thrill of a slender hand may be felt, when the stars wink tender encouragement from the depths of God’s own firmament, when all the world is hushed to make the opportunity: ’tis then all well enough to speak of love. There is nothing, I know, to compare in ecstasy with the whisper and sigh and clinging touch of that time––to compare with the awe and mystery and solemnity of it. But ’tis sacrilegious and most desperately difficult and embarrassing, I find, at this distant day, to write of it. I had thought much upon love, at that wise age––fifteen, it was, I fancy––and it seemed to me, I recall, a thing to cherish within the heart of a man, to hide as a treasure, to dwell upon, alone, in moments of purest exaltation. ’Twas not a thing to bandy about where punts lay tossing in the lap of the sea; ’twas not a thing to tell the green, secretive old hills of Twin Islands; ’twas not a thing to which the doors of the workaday world might be opened, lest the ribaldry to which it come offend and wound it: ’twas a thing to conceal, far and deep, from the common gaze and comment, from the vulgar chances, the laugh and cynical exhaustion and bleared wit of the life we live. I loved Judith––her eyes and tawny hair and slender213finger-tips, her whimsical way, her religious, loving soul. I loved her; and I would not have you think ’twas any failure of adoration to pour my uncle an honest dram of rum when she was stowed away in innocency of all the evil under the moon. ’Tis a thing that maids have nothing to do with, thinks I; ’tis a knowledge, indeed, that would defile them....
“Dannie,” says my uncle, once, when we were left alone, “he’ve begun t’ fall.”
I was mystified.
“The parson,” he explained, in a radiant whisper; “he’ve begun t’ yield.”
“T’ what?” I demanded.
“Temptation. He’ve a dark eye, lad, as I ’lowed long ago, an’ he’ve begun t’ give way t’ argument.”
“God’s sake, Uncle Nick!” I cried, “leave the poor man be. He’ve done no harm.”
He scratched his stubble of hair, and contemplatively traced a crimson scar with his forefinger. “No,” he mused, his puckered, weathered brow in a doubtful frown; “not so far. But,” he added, looking cheerily up, “I’ve hopes that I’ll manage un yet.”
“Leave un alone,” I pleaded.
“Ay,” says he, with a hitch of his wooden leg; “but Ineedsun.”
I protested.
“Ye don’t s’pose, Dannie,” he complained, in a righteous flash, “that I’m able t’ live forever, does ye?”
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I did not, but heartily wished he might; and by this sincere expression he was immediately mollified.
“Well,” says he, his left eyelid drooping in a knowing way, his whole round person, from his topmost bristle to his gouty wooden toe, braced to receive the shock of my congratulation, “I’ve gone an’ worked that there black-an’-white young parson along! Sir Harry hisself,” he declared, “couldn’t have done it no better. Nor ol’ Skipper Chesterfield, neither,” says he.
’Twas a pity.
“No,” he boasted, defiantly; “nor none o’ them wise ol’ bullies of old!”
I sighed.
“Dannie,” says he, with the air of imparting a grateful secret, “I got that there black-an’-white young parson corrupted. I got un,” he repeated, leaning forward, his fantastic countenance alight with pride and satisfaction––“I got un corrupted! I’ve got un t’ say,” says he, “that ’tis sometimes wise t’ do evil that good may come. An’ when a young feller says that,” says he, with a grave, grave nodding, so that his disfigurements were all most curiously elongated, “he’ve sold his poor, mean soul t’ the devil.”
“I wisht,” I complained, “that you’d leave the poor man alone.”
“Why, Dannie,” says my uncle, simply, “he’s paid for!”
“Paid for!” cries I.
“Ay, lad,” he chided; “t’ be sure, that there young black-an’-white parson is paid for.”
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I wondered how that might be.
“Paid for!” my uncle repeated, in a quivering, indrawn breath, the man having fallen, all at once, into gloom and terror. “’Tis all paid for!”
Here again was the disquieting puzzle of my childish years: my uncle, having now leaned forward to come close to me, was in a spasmodic way indicating the bowels of the earth with a turned thumb. Down, down: it seemed he pointed to infinite depths of space and woe. Down, down––continuing thus, with a slow, grevious wagging of the great, gray head the sea had in the brutal passion of some wild night maltreated. The familiar things of the room, the simple, companionable furniture of that known place, with the geometrically tempestuous ocean framed beyond, were resolved into a background of mysterious shadows as I stared; there was nothing left within the circle of my vision but a scared gargoyle, leaning into the red glow of the fire. My uncle’s round little eyes protruded––started from the bristles and purpling scars and brown flesh of his broad face––as many a time before I had in sad bewilderment watched them do. Paid for––all the pride and comfort and strange advantages of my life! All paid for in the black heart of this mystery! And John Cather, too! I wondered again, with an eye upon my uncle’s significantly active thumb, having no courage to meet his poignant glance, how that might be. According to my catechism, severely taught in other years, I must ask no questions, but must courteously await enlightenment at my uncle’s pleasure; and ’twas most marvellously216hard––this night of all the nights––to keep my soul unspotted from the sin of inquisitiveness.
“Paid for,” my uncle repeated, hoarse with awe, “by poor Tom Callaway!”
’Twas kind in my father, thinks I, to provide thus bounteously for my welfare.
“Poor Tom!” my uncle sighed, now recovering his composure. “Poor, poor ol’ Tom––in the place he’s to!”
“Still an’ all, Uncle Nick,” I blundered, “I wisht you’d leave my tutor be.”
“Ye’re but a child!” he snapped. “Put the stopper in the bottle. ’Tis time you was in bed.”
’Twas an unexpected rebuke. I was made angry with him, for the only time in all my life; and to revenge myself I held the bottle to the lamp, and deliberately measured its contents, before his astonished eyes, so that, though I left it with him, he could not drink another drop without my knowing it; and I stoppered the bottle, as tight as I was able, and left him to get his wooden toe from the stool with the least agony he could manage, and would not bank the fire or light his night-lamp. I loved my tutor, and would not have him corrupted; ’twas a hateful thought to conceive that he might come unwittingly to ruin at our hands. ’Twas a shame in my old uncle, thinks I, to fetch him to despair. John Cather’s soul bargained for and bought! ’Twas indeed a shame to say it. There was no evil in him when he came clear-eyed from the great world beyond us; there should be no evil in him when he left us,217whenever that might be, to renew the life he would not tell us of. I looked my uncle in the eye in a way that hurt and puzzled him. I wish I had not; but I did, as I pounded the cork home, and boldly slipped the screw into my pocket. He would go on short allowance, that night, thinks I: for his nails, broken by toil, would never pick the stopper out. And I prepared, in a rage, to fling out of the room, when––
“Dannie!” he called.
I halted.
“What’s this?” says he, gently. “It never happened afore, little shipmate, betwixt you an’ me. What’s this?” he begged. “I’m troubled.”
I pulled the cork of his bottle, and poured a dram, most liberally, to delight his heart; and I must turn my face away, somehow, to hide it from him, because of shame for this mean doubt of him, ungenerous and ill-begotten.
“I’m troubled,” he repeated. “What’s this, lad?”
I could not answer him.
“Is I been unkind, Dannie?”
“No,” I sobbed. “’Tis that I’ve been wicked t’you!”
He looked at me with eyes grown very grave. “Ah!” says he, presently, comprehending. “That’s good,” says he, in his slow, gentle way. “That’s very good. But ye’ll fret no more, will ye, Dannie? An’ ye’ve growed too old t’ cry. Go t’ bed, lad. Ye’re all wore out. I’ll manage the lamp alone. God bless ye. Go t’ bed.”
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I waited.
“That’s good,” he repeated, in a muse, staring deep into the red coals in the grate. “That’s very good.”
I ran away––closed my door upon this wretched behavior, but could not shut its ghastly sauciness and treachery from the chambers of my memory. The habit of faith and affection was strong: I was no longer concerned for my friend John Cather, but was mightily ashamed of this failure in duty to the grotesque old hook-and-line man who had without reserve of sacrifice or strength nourished me to the lusty years of that night. As I lay in bed, I recall, downcast, self-accusing, flushed with shame, I watched the low clouds scud across the starlit sky, and I perceived, while the torn, wind-harried masses rushed restlessly on below the high, quiet firmament, that I had fallen far away from the serenity my uncle would teach me to preserve in every fortune.
“I’ll not fail again!” thinks I. “Not I!”
’Twas an experience profitable or unprofitable, as you shall presently judge.
219XVIIIA LEGACY OF LOVE
Moses Shoos, I recall, carried the mail that winter. ’Twas a thankless task: a matter of thirty miles to Jimmie Tick’s Cove and thirty back again. Miles hard with peril and brutal effort––a way of sleet and slush, of toilsome paths, of a swirling mist of snow, of stinging, perverse winds or frosty calm, of lowering days and the haunted dark o’ night––to be accomplished, once a week, afoot and alone, by way of barren and wilderness and treacherous ice. ’Twas a thankless task, indeed; but ’twas a task to which the fool of Twist Tickle addressed himself with peculiar reverence.
“Mother,” says he, “always ’lowed that a man ought t’ serve his Queen: an’ mother knowed. ‘Moses,’ says she, afore she died, ‘a good man haves justgott’ serve the Queen: for an good men don’t,’ says she, ‘the poor Lady is bound t’ come t’ grief along o’ rascals. Poor,poorLady!’ says she. ‘She’ve a wonderful lot t’ put up with along o’ stupid folk an’ rascals. I’m not knowin’ how she bears it an’ lives. ’Tis a mean, poor dunderhead, with heart an’ brains in his gullet,’ says she, ‘that wouldn’t serve the Queen. God save the Queen!’ says220mother. ‘What’s a man worth,’ says she, ‘that on’y serves hisself?’”
Not much, thinks I!
“An’ mother knowed,” says Moses, softly. “Ay, Dannie,” he declared, with a proud little grin, “I bet youmotherknowed!”
’Twas this exalted ideal of public service, fashioned in the wisdom of the simple by the amazing mother who bore him, that led the fool, as by the hand, from a wilderness of snow and night and bewildered visions, wherein no aspiration of his own shaped itself, to the warm hearth of Twist Tickle and the sleep of a child by night.
Once I watched him stagger, white and bent with weather and labor, from the ice of Ship’s Run, his bag on his back, to the smoking roofs of Twist Tickle, which winter had spread with a snowy blanket and tucked in with anxious hands. ’Twas a bitter day, cold, windy, aswirl with the dust of snow, blinding as a mist. I sat with Judith in the wide, deeply cushioned window-seat of my lib’ry, as my uncle called the comfortable, book-shelved room he had, by advice o’ Sir Harry, provided for my youth. John Cather was not about; and I caressed, I recall, the long, slender fingers of her hand, which unfailingly and without hesitation gave themselves to my touch. She would never deny me that, this maid; ’twas only kisses she would hold me from. She would snuggle close and warmly, when John Cather was not about, but would call her God to witness that221kisses were prohibited where happiness would continue.
“’Tis not’lowed, child,” says she.
Her cheek was so close, so round and soft and delicately tinted, that I touched my lips to it, quite unable to resist.
“I don’t mindthat,” says she.
’Twas vastly encouraging.
“’Twas so brotherly,” she added.
“Judy,” I implored, “I’m in need of another o’ that same kind.”
“No, no!” she cried. “You’d never find the spot!”
’Twas with the maid, then, I sat in the window-seat of my warm room, content with the finger-tips I might touch and kiss as I would, lifted into a mood most holy and aspiring by the weight of her small head upon my shoulder, the bewildering light and mystery of her great, blue eyes, the touch and sweet excitement of her tawny hair, which brushed my cheek, as she well knew, this perverse maid! John Cather was not about, and the maid was yielding, as always in his absence; and I was very happy. ’Twas Moses we observed, all this time, doggedly staggering, upon patriotic duty, from the white, swirling weather of that unkind day, in the Queen’s service, his bag on his back.
“He’ve his mother t’ guide un,” says she.
“An’ his father?”
“’Tis said that he was lost,” she answered, “in the Year o’ the Big Shore Catch; but I’m knowin’ nothin’ about that.”
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I remembered the secret Elizabeth would impart to my uncle Nicholas.
“Myfather,” says Judith, in challenge, “was a very good man.”
I was not disposed to deny it.
“A very good man,” she repeated, eying me sharply for any sign of incredulity.
’Twas her fancy: I might indulge it.
“I ’low, Dannie,” says she, “that he was a wonderful handsome man, though I never seed un. God’s sake!” cries she, defiantly, “he’d be hard t’ beat for looks in this here harbor.” She was positive; there was no uncertainty––’twas as though she had known him as fathers are known. And ’twas by no wish of mine, now, that our hands came close together, that her eyes were bent without reserve upon my own, that she snuggled up to my great, boyish body: ’twas wholly a wish of the maid. “’Twas blue eyes he had,” says she, “an’ yellow hair an’ big shoulders. He was a parson, Dannie,” she proceeded. “I ’low he must have been. He––he––was!” she declared; “he was a great, big parson with blue eyes.” I would not be a parson, thinks I, whatever the maid might wish. “An’ he ’lowed,” she continued, pursuing her wilful fancy, “that he’d come back, some day, an’ love my mother as she knowed he could.” We watched Moses Shoos come across the harbor ice and break open the door of the postmaster’s cottage. “But he was wrecked an’ drowned,” says Judith, “an’ ’twas an end of my mother’s hope. ’Twas on’y that,” says she, “that she would tell Skipper223Nicholas on the night she died. ’Twas just the wish that he would bring me up, as he’ve fetched up you, Dannie,” she added: “jus’ that––an’ the name o’ my father. I’m not sorry,” says she, with her head on my shoulder, “that she never told the name.”
Elizabeth carried her secret into the greater mystery to which she passed; ’twas never known to us, nor to any one....
“Moses,” says I, in delight, when the news got abroad, “I hears you got the contract for the mail?”
“I is,” says he.
“An’ how in the name o’ Heaven,” I demanded, “did you manage so great a thing?”
There had been competition, I knew: there had been consideration and consultation––there had been the philosophy of the aged concerning the carrying of mail in past years, the saucy anarchy of the young with regard to the gruelling service, the chatter of wishful women upon the spending value of the return, the speculatively saccharine brooding of children––there had been much sage prophecy and infinitely knowing advice––there had been misleading and secrecy and sly devising––there had been envy, bickering, disruption of friendship––there had been a lavish waste and disregard of character––there had been all this, as I knew, and more pitiable still, in competition for the weekly four dollars of government money. ’Twas a most marvellous achievement, thinks I, that the fool of Twist Tickle had from this still weather of reason and tempest of feeling224emerged with the laurel of wisdom (as my tutor said) to crown him. ’Twas fair hard to credit! I must know the device––the clever political trick––by which the wags and wiseacres of Twist Tickle had been discomfited. ’Twas with this hungry curiosity that I demanded of the fool of Twist Tickle how he had managed so great a thing.
“Eh, Moses,” says I; “howwasit?”
“Dannie,” he gravely explained, “’tis very simple. My bid,” says he, impressively, “was the lowest.”
“An’ how much was that, Moses?”
“Mother,” he observed, “didn’t hold a wonderful lot with half measures.”
’Twas no answer to my question.
“She always ’lowed,” says he, with a mystifyingly elaborate wave and accent, “thatdoin’was better thangettin’.”
I still must wait.
“‘Moses,’ says she,” he pursued, “‘don’t you mind the price o’ fish; youcotchun. Fish,’ says she, ‘is fish; but prices goes up an’ down, accordin’ t’ the folly o’ men. Youdo,’ says she; ‘an’ you leave what yougetst’ take care of itself.’ An’ I ’low,” says Moses, gently, a smile transfiguring his vacant face, “that mother knowed.”
’Twas all, it seemed to me, a defensive argument.
“An’ mother ’lowed, afore she died,” he added, looking up to a gray sky, wherein a menace of snow dwelt, “that a good man would save his Queen from rascals.”
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“Ay,” I complained; “but what was the bid that won from Eli Flack?”
“The bid?”
“Ay; the bid.”
“Not expensive,” says he.
“But how much, Moses?”
“Well, Dannie,” he answered, with a sigh and a rub of his curly, yellow beard, “I ’lowed mother wouldn’t charge much for servin’ the Queen: for,” says he, enlivened, “’twould be too much like common labor t’ carry Her Majesty’s mail at a price. An’ I bid,” he added, eying me vaguely, “accordin’ t’ what I ’lowed mother would have me do in the Queen’s service.Fac’ is, Dannie,” says he, in a squall of confidence, “I ’lowed I’d carry it free!”
’Twas this contact with the world of Jimmie Tick’s Cove that embarked the fool upon an adventurous enterprise. When, in the spring of that year, the sea being open, theQuick as Winkmade our harbor, the first of all the traders, Tumm, the clerk, was short-handed for a cook, having lost young Billy Rudd overboard, in a great sea, beating up in stress of weather to the impoverished settlement at Diamond Run. ’Twas Moses, the choice of necessity, he shipped in the berth of that merry, tow-headed lad of tender voice, whose songs, poor boy! would never again be lifted, o’ black nights in harbor, in the forecastle of theQuick as Wink. “Ay, Dannie,” says Moses, “you’d never think it, maybe, but I’m shipped along o’ Tumm for the French226shore an’ the Labrador ports. I’ve heared tell a wonderful lot about Mother Burke, but I’ve never seed the ol’ rock; an’ I’ve heared tell a wonderful lot about Coachman’s Cove an’ Conch an’ Lancy Loop an’ the harbors o’ the straits shores, but I’ve never seed un with my own eyes, an’ I’m sort o’ wantin’ t’ know how they shapes up alongside o’ Twist Tickle. I ’low,” says he, “you don’t find many harbors in the world like Twist Tickle. Since I been travellin’ t’ Jimmie Tick’s Cove with the mail,” he continued, with a stammer and flush, like a man misled from an austere path by the flesh-pots of earth, “I’ve cotched a sinful hankerin’ t’ see the world.”
I wished he had not.
“But mother,” he added, quickly, in self-defence, “always ’lowed a manoughtt’ see the world. So,” says he, “I’m shipped along o’ Tumm, for better or for worse, an’ I’m bound down north in theQuick as Winkwith the spring supplies.”
’Twas a far journey for that sensitive soul.
“Dannie,” he asked, in quick alarm, a fear so sudden and unexpected that I was persuaded of the propriety of my premonition, “what you thinkin’ about? Eh, Dannie?” he cried. “What you lookin’ that way for?”
I would not tell him that I knew the skipper of theQuick as Wink, whose butt the fool must be.
“You isn’t ’lowin’,” Moses began, “that mother––”
“Not at all, Moses!” says I.
’Twas instant and complete relief he got from this denial. “We sails,” says he, with all a traveller’s importance,227“at dawn o’ to-morrow. I’ll be gone from Twist Tickle by break o’ day. I’ll be gone t’ new places––t’ harbors I’ve heared tell of but never seed with my own eyes. I’m not quite knowin’,” says he, doubtfully, “how I’ll get along with the cookin’. Mother always ’lowed,” he continued, with a greater measure of hope, “that I was more’n fair on cookin’ a cup o’ tea. ‘Moses,’ says she, ‘you can brew a cup o’ tea so well as any fool I ever knowed.’ But that was on’y mother,” he added, in modest self-deprecation. “Jus’ mother.”
I wished again that the fool had not fallen into the mercilessly facetious company of Skipper Saucy Bill North of the schoonerQuick as Wink.
“An’, Dannie,” says Moses, “I’m scared I’ll fail with all but the tea.”
’Twas come near the evening of that mellow Sunday. On the Whisper Cove road and the greening hills of Twin Islands, where Moses and I had walked in simple companionship, the birds had been mating and nesting in the thick sunshine of the afternoon. Chirp and flutter and shrill song! ’Twas a time for the mating of birds. The haste and noise and pomposity of this busy love-making! The loud triumph and soft complaint of it! All the world of spruce and alder and sunlit spaces had been a-flutter. But the weather was now fallen gloomy, the sky overcast, the wind blowing in from the black, uneasy sea, where floes and gigantic bergs of ice drifted, like frozen ghosts, cold and dead and aimlessly driven; and the hopeful sunshine had left the hills, and the piping and chirping were stilled, and I heard no228more fluttering wings or tender love-songs. The fool of Twist Tickle paused in the road to stare vacantly northward. ’Twas there dark with menacing clouds––thick, sombre clouds, tinged with a warning blue, rising implacably above the roughening black of the sea. He wondered, it may be, in his dull, weakling way, concerning the coasts beyond the grave curtain, which he must discover––new coasts, dealing with us variously, as we disclose them to our hearts. I watched him with misgiving. To be sure, the skipper of theQuick as Winkwas an unkind man, cynical and quick to seek selfish laughter, whatever the wound he dealt; but Tumm, our friend and the genial friend of all the world, thinks I, more hopefully, would not have the poor fool wronged.
“Dannie,” says Moses, turning, “I’m scared my cookin’ won’t quite fit the stomachs o’ the crew o’ theQuick as Wink.”
“Ay, Moses,” says I, to hearten him; “but never a good man was that didn’t fear a new task.”
He eyed me doubtfully.
“An’,” I began, “your mother, Moses––”
“But,” he interrupted, “mother wasn’t quite t’ be trusted in all things.”
“Not trusted!” I cried.
“You’ll not misunderstand me, Dannie?” he besought me, putting a hand on my shoulder. “You’ll not misunderstand, will you? But mother wasn’t quite t’ be trusted,” says he, “when it come t’ the discussion,” says he, pausing to permit a proper appreciation of the229learned word, which he had appropriated from my tutor’s vocabulary, “o’ my accomplishments.”
It had never occurred before.
“For mother,” he explained, “was somehow wonderful fond o’ me.”
The church-bell called him.
“Hear her voice, Dannie?” said he. “Hear her voice in that there bell? ‘Come––dear!’ says she. ‘Come––dear! Come––dear!’ Hear it ring out? ‘Come––dear! Come––dear! Come––dear!’”
I bade him God-speed with a heart that misgave me.
“I’ll answer,” said he, his face lifted to the sky, “to that voice!”
The clouds in the west broke, and through the rift a shaft of sunlight shot, glad to be free, and touched our world of sea and rock with loving finger-tips, but failed, as I turned homeward, hearing no voice of my unknown mother in the wandering call of the bell; and all the world went gray and sullenly mute, as it had been....
230XIXA WORD OF WARNING
Presently my uncle and I made ready to set out for St. John’s upon the sinister business which twice a year engaged his evil talents at the wee waterside place wherein he was the sauciest dog in the pack. There was now no wandering upon the emotionless old hills of Twin Islands to prepare him, no departure from the fishing, no unseemly turning to the bottle, to factitious rage; but he brooded more despairingly in his chair by the window when the flare of western glory left the world. At evening, when he thought me gone upon my pleasure, I watched him from the shadows of the hall, grave with youth, wishing, all the while, that he might greet the night with gratitude for the mercy of it; and I listened to his muttering––and I saw that he was grown old and weak with age: unequal, it might be, to the wickedness he would command in my service. “For behold the Lord will come with fire, and with his chariots like a whirlwind, to render his anger with fury, and his rebuke with the flames of fire.” For me ’twas still sweet to watch the tender shadows creep upon the231western fire, to see the great gray rocks dissolve, to hear the sea’s melodious whispering; but to him the sea spoke harshly and the night came with foreboding. I wished that he would forsake the evil he followed for my sake. I would be a club-footed, paddle-punt fisherman, as the gray little man from St. John’s had said, and be content with that fortune, could my uncle but look into the eyes of night without misgiving.
But I must not tell him so....
We left John Cather behind.
“Uncle Nick,” says I, “I ’low we’d best have un along.”
“An’ why?” cries he.
“I don’t know,” says I, honestly puzzled.
He looked at me quizzically. “Is you sure?” he asked. His eyes twinkled. “Is you sure you doesn’t know?”
“I don’t know,” I answered, frowning. “I don’t know at all.”
“Dannie,” says he, significantly, “’tisn’t time yet for John Cather t’ go t’ St. John’s. You got t’ take your chance.”
“What chance?” I demanded.
“I don’t know,” says he.
I scowled.
“But,” says he, “an I was you I wouldn’t fear on no account whatever. No,” he repeated, “Iwouldn’t fear––an I was you.”
So John Cather was left with Judy and the watchful232maid-servant who loved her, having no child of her own, when my uncle and I fared out of the tickle upon the outside boat. I was troubled in the dark and wash and heave of that night, but could not for the life of me tell why. John Cather had bade me good-bye with a heartening laugh and clap on the shoulder. ’Twas with gratitude––and sure persuasion of unworthiness––that I remembered his affection. And Judy had given me a sisterly kiss of farewell which yet lingered upon my lips so warmly that in my perplexity I was conscious of it lying there and must like a thirsty man feel the place her moist mouth had touched. ’Twas grief, thinks I, because of parting with my friend John Cather; and I puzzled no longer, but devoted myself to the accomplishment of manners, as I had been taught, and now attended with interest, having grown old and wise. ’Twas rainy weather, windy, with the sea in an ugly pother off the rocks of our hard coast. ’Twas wet, blustering weather, indeed, all the hapless time we were gone from Twist Tickle: the tap-rooms of St. John’s, I recall, disagreeably steamed and reeked. My uncle put me to bed that night with a motherly injunction to recite the twenty-third psalm for safety against the perils of the sea and the machinations of wicked men, and to regard the precepts of the noble Lord Chesterfield for guidance in more difficult waters: the man being quite sober for the first time in all my life upon these occasions of departure.
“Dannie, lad,” says he, “you cling t’ that there little anchor I’m give ye t’ hold to.”
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I asked him mechanically what that was.
“The twenty-third psa’m,” says he.
To this I promised.
“An’, Dannie,” says he, drawing the great bandanna handkerchief from his trousers-pocket to blow his nose, “don’t ye be gettin’ lonely: for Dannie––”
I must sharply attend.
“I’m for’ard,” he declared, “standin’ by!”
He could not perceive, poor man! that I was no longer to be dealt with as a child.
There befell me in the city a singular encounter. ’Twas of a soggy, dismal day: there was a searching wind abroad, I recall, to chill the marrow of impoverished folk, a gray light upon all the slimy world, a dispiriting fog flowing endlessly in scowling clouds over the hills to thicken and eddy and drip upon the streets and harbor. It being now at the crisis of my uncle’s intoxication, I was come from my hotel alone, wandering without aim, to speed the anxious hours. Abreast of the familiar door of the Anchor and Chain, where long ago I had gratefully drunk with Cap’n Jack Large, I paused; and I wondered, as I stared at the worn brass knob, now broken into beads of cold sweat with the weather, whether or not I might venture some persuasion upon my perverse uncle, but was all at once plucked by the tail of my coat, and turned in a rage to resent the impudence. ’Twas but a scrawny, brass-buttoned boy, however, with an errand for the lad with the rings, as they called me. I followed, to be sure, and234was by this ill-nourished messenger led to the crossing of King Street with Water, where my uncle was used to tap-tapping the pavement. Thence in a moment we ascended to a group of office-rooms, on the opposite side of the street, wherein, having been ceremoniously ushered, I found the gray stranger who had called me a club-footed, ill-begotten young whelp, on that windy night at Twist Tickle, and had with meaning complacency threatened my uncle’s assassination.
I had not expected it.
“Ha!” snaps he. “Here you are, eh?”
To my amazement.
“You know me?” he demanded.
I did not know his quality, which seemed, however, by the state he dwelt in, by the deference he commanded from the scrawny, brass-buttoned, ill-nourished, tragically obsequious child who had fetched me, to be of distinction.
“Sit down,” he bade me.
I would not.
“Well, well!” cries he. “You’ve manners as brief as your memory.”
’Twas a vivid recollection that had shorn my manner to the bare. My uncle had not been quick enough to sweep the lamp from the table: I remembered this man. ’Twas he who had of that windy night most cruelly damned me; ’twas he who had struck my uncle.
“I’ve not forgot you, sir,” says I.
He was gray: he was indeed most incredibly gray––gray of hair and eye and brow and flesh, gray of mood235and outlook upon the world, forever dwelling, as it seemed, in a gray fog of suspicion and irascibility. I was gone over, from pate to shrinking club-foot, with more intimate and intelligently curious observation than ever a ’longshore jack or coast-wise skipper had achieved in the years when I wore rings. Never before had I suffered a stare more keen and unabashed: ’twas an assurance stripped of insolence by some tragical need and right. He sat beyond a broad, littered table, leaning forward upon it, his back to the riley light, his drawn face nestled within the lean, white hands of him; and ’twas now a brooding inspection I must bear––an unself-conscious thing, remote from my feeling, proceeding from eyes as gray as winter through narrow slits that rapidly snapped shut and flashed open in spasmodic winking. He was a man of fashion, of authority, of large affairs, it seemed––a gentleman, according to my uncle’s code and fashion-plates. But he was now by my presence so wretchedly detached from the great world he moved in that for a moment I was stirred to pity him. What had this masterful little man, thinks I, to fear from Dannie Callaway of Twist Tickle?
Enough, as it turned out; but ’twas all an unhappy mystery to me on that drear, clammy day.
“Come, sir!” says I, in anger. “You’ve fetched me here?”
He seemed not to hear.
“What you wantin’ of me?” I brusquely asked.
“Yes,” says he, sighing; “you are here, aren’t you?” He fingered the papers on his table in a way so desultory236and weak that once more I was moved to pity him. Then, with blank eyes, and hopelessly hanging lip, a lean finger still continuing to rustle the forgotten documents, he looked out of the window, where ’twas all murky and dismal, harbor and rocky hill beyond obliterated by the dispiriting fog. “I wish to warn you,” he continued. “You think, perhaps,” he demanded, looking sharply into my eyes, “that you are kin of mine?”
I had no such dreadful fear, and, being an unkind lad, frankly told him.
“You dream,” he pursued, “that you were born to some station?”
I would not have him know.
“Daniel,” says he, with a faint twinkle of amusement and pity, “tell me of that wretched dream.”
’Twas a romantic hope that had lingered with me despite my wish to have it begone: but I would not tell this man. I had fancied, as what lad would not? but with no actual longing, because of love for Judith, that the ultimate revelation would lift me high in the world. But now, in the presence of this gray personage, under his twinkle and pitying grin, the fancy forever vanished from me. ’Twas comforting to know, at any rate, that I might wed Judith without outrage. There would be small difficulty, then, thinks I, in winning the maid; and ’twas most gratifying to know it.
“Daniel,” says he, in distress, “has that rascally Top misled you to this ridiculously romantic conclusion?”
“No, sir,” I answered.
“You are the son,” he declared, with thin-lipped deliberation,237by which I was persuaded and sorely chagrined, “of Tom Callaway, who was lost, with all hands but the chiefest rascal it has been my lot to encounter, in the wreck of theWill-o’-the-Wisp. Tom Callaway, master: he was your father. Your mother,” he continued, “was a St. John’s water-side maid––a sweet and lovely wife, who died when you were born. I was myself not indifferent to her most pure and tender charms. There is your pedigree,” says he, his voice fallen kind. “No mystery, you see––no romance. Tom Callaway, master: he was your father. This man Top,” he snapped, “this vulgar, drunken, villanous fellow, into whose hands you have unhappily fallen and by whose mad fancies you will inevitably be ruined, is the sole survivor of theWill-o’-the-Wisp, with which your father very properly went down. He is nothing to you––nothing––neither kith nor kin! He is an intruder upon you: he has no natural right to your affection; nor have you a natural obligation to regard him. He has most viciously corrupted you into the fantastic notion that you are of gentle and fortunate birth. With what heart, in God’s name!” the gray man cried, clapping his lean hands in a passion, “he will face you when he must disclose the truth, I cannot conceive. Mad! The man is stark mad: for tell you he must, though he has in every way since your childhood fostered within you a sense of honor that will break in contempt upon him! Your attitude, I warn you, will work wretchedness to you both; you will accuse and flout him. Daniel,” the man solemnly asked, “do you believe me?”
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I was glad to know that my mother had been both sweet and lovely. ’Twas a conception I had long cherished. ’Twas what Judith was––both sweet and lovely.
“You will accuse him, I warn you!” he repeated.
Still gray weather, I observed through the grimy panes: fog sweeping by with a northeast wind. For a moment I watched the dripping passengers on the opposite pavement.
“Well,” says the gray stranger, with a harsh little laugh, “God help Top when the tale is told!”
I should never, of course, treat my uncle with unkindness.
“My boy,” he most earnestly besought me, “will you not heed me?”
“I’ll hear you, sir,” I answered.
“Attend, then,” says he. “I have brought you here to warn you, and my warning is but half spoken. Frankly, in this I have no concern for your happiness, with which I have nothing to do: I have been moved to this ungrateful and most dangerous interview by a purely selfish regard for my own career. Do you know the word? A political career of some slight importance,” he added, with a toss of the head, “which is now menaced, at a most critical moment, by that merciless, wicked old pirate whom you have shamelessly been deceived into calling your uncle Nicholas. To be frank with you, you are, and have been for several years, an obstacle. My warning, however, as you will believe, is advanced upon grounds advantageous to yourself. Put the illusions of this designing old bay-noddie away from239you,” says he, now accentuating his earnestness with a lean, white forefinger. “Rid yourself of these rings and unsuitable garments: they disgrace you. When the means of their possession is disclosed to you––when the wretched crime of it is made known––you will suffer such humiliation as you did not dream a man could feel. Put ’em away. Put ’em out of sight and mind. Send that young man from London back to the business he came from. A tutor! Your tutor! Tom Callaway’s son with an English tutor! You are being made a ghastly fool of; and I warn you that you will pay for every moment of the illusion. Poor lad!” cries he, in genuine distress. “Poor lad!”
It might be: I had long thought so.
“And as for this grand tour abroad,” he began, with an insolently curling lip, “why, for God’s sake! don’t be a––”
“Sir!” I interrupted, in a rage.
There had been talk of a trip abroad: it seemed I was bound upon it, by advice of Sir Harry, to further my education and to cure my foot of its twist.
“Well,” the gray personage laughed, “being what you are, remembering what I have with candor and exact honesty told you, if you can permit this old pirate––”
I stopped him. I would have no more of it––not I, by Heaven!
“This extortionate old––”
“I’ll not hear it!” I roared.
“In this fine faith,” sneers he, “I find at least the240gratifying prospect of being some day privileged to observe Top broil as on a griddle in hell.”
’Twas most obscure.
“I refer,” says he, “to the moment of grand climax when this pirate tells you where your diamonds came from. Your diamonds?” he flashed. “You may get quit of your diamonds; but the fine gentleman this low villain has fashioned of a fishing-skipper’s whelp will all your days keep company at your elbow. And you won’t love Top for this,” says he, with malevolent satisfaction; “you won’t love Top!”
I walked to the window for relief from him. ’Twas all very well that he should discredit and damn my uncle in this way; ’twas all very well that he should raise spectres of unhappiness before me: but there, on the opposite pavement, abroad in the foggy wind, jostled by ill-tempered passengers, was this self-same old foster-father of mine, industriously tap-tapping the pavement with his staff, as he had periodically done, whatever the weather, since I could remember the years of my life. I listened to the angry tapping, watched the urchins and curious folk gather for the show; and I was moved to regard the mystifying spectacle with an indulgent grin. The gray stranger, however, at that instant got ear of the patter of the staff and the clamor of derision. He cried upon me sharply to stand from the window; but I misliked this harsh manner of authority, and would not budge: whereupon he sprang upon me, caught me about the middle, and violently flung me back. ’Twas too late to avert the catastrophe: my uncle had241observed me, and was even then bound across the street, flying all sail, to the terrified confusion of the exalted political personage whose career he menaced. ’Twas a pitiable spectacle of fright and helpless uncertainty the man furnished, seeming at one moment bent on keeping my uncle out, whom he feared to admit, at another to wish him well in, whom he dared not exclude.
“The man’s stark mad!” he would repeat, in his panic of gesture and pacing. “The man’s stark mad to risk this!”
My uncle softly closed the door behind him. “Ah, Dannie!” says he. “You here?” He was breathless, and gone a ghastly color; there was that about his scars and eyes, too, to make me wonder whether ’twas rage or fear had mastered him: I could not tell, but mightily wished to determine, since it seemed that some encounter impended. “Ye’re an unkind man,” says he, in a passionless way, to the gray stranger, who was now once more seated at his desk, fingering the litter of documents. “Ye’ve broke your word t’ me. I must punish ye for the evil ye’ve done this lad. I’ll not ask ye what ye’ve told un till I haves my way with ye; but then,” he declared, his voice betraying a tremor of indignation, “I’ll have the talk out o’ ye, word for word!” The gray stranger was agitated, but would not look up from his aimlessly wandering hand to meet my uncle’s lowering, reproachful eyes. “Dannie,” says my uncle, continuing in gentle speech, “pass the cushion from the big chair. Thank ’e, lad. I’m not wantin’ the man t’ hurt his head.” He cast the cushion to the floor.242“Now, sir,” says he, gently, “an ye’ll be good enough t’ step within five-foot-ten o’ that there red cushion, I’ll knock ye down an’ have it over with.”
The man looked sullenly out of the window.
“Five-foot-ten, sir,” my uncle repeated, with some cheerfulness.
“Top,” was the vicious response, “you invite assassination.”
My uncle put his hand on my shoulder. “’Tis not fit for ye t’ see, lad,” says he. “Ye’d best be off t’ the fresh air. ’Tis so wonderful stuffy here that ye’ll be growin’ pale an ye don’t look out. An’ I’m not wantin’ ye t’ see me knock a man down,” he repeated, with feeling. “I’m not wantin’ ye even t’thinkthat I’d do an unkind thing like that.”
I moved to go.
“Now, sir!” cries my uncle to the stranger.
As I closed the door behind me the man was passing with snarling lips to the precise spot my uncle had indicated....