Abuse of the Procreative Function—The Continent Life—Provide the Environment Necessary to the Clean Life—The Period of Procreative Power—Self-abuse—Masturbation—Treatment of Masturbation—Night Losses or Wet Dreams—Causes of Night Emissions—Sexual Excesses—Treatment of Sexual Excesses—What Parents Should Know About the So-called "Social Evil," Before Speaking with Authority to the Boy—The Need of Enlightenment in Sexual Matters—"No One Told Me, I Did Not Know"—Fake Medical Treatment of Venereal Diseases—Sowing Wild Oats—Should Circumcision be Advised?
Abuse of the Procreative Function—The Continent Life—Provide the Environment Necessary to the Clean Life—The Period of Procreative Power—Self-abuse—Masturbation—Treatment of Masturbation—Night Losses or Wet Dreams—Causes of Night Emissions—Sexual Excesses—Treatment of Sexual Excesses—What Parents Should Know About the So-called "Social Evil," Before Speaking with Authority to the Boy—The Need of Enlightenment in Sexual Matters—"No One Told Me, I Did Not Know"—Fake Medical Treatment of Venereal Diseases—Sowing Wild Oats—Should Circumcision be Advised?
Abuse of the Procreative Function.—Breeders of animals have discovered that to breed from very young stock is not good. The quality and stamina of the progeny is lowered and the vitality of the parent stock is reduced. It is not a good economic proposition.
Boys should therefore be taught that any form of sexual indulgence is harmful before the period of full growth.
Nature did not intend that the procreative function should be exercised by individuals who were not fully developed. The perpetuation of the species must not depend upon the license of immaturity. The instinct of sex-attraction must not be debased to serve a puerile, rather than a holy purpose.
Sexual indulgence in any form, and in any degree, at any age prior to full maturity is a perversion of the primal instinct of race perpetuation. The practice has a more intimate and a more personal association with growing boys, however, than a merely altruistic reference. Any indulgence of this character at this time is physically and mentally injurious. No boy can hope ever to acquire the full measure of his possible development as an efficient working or thinking machine if he wastes his vitalforces in unnatural liberties. He should be taught this truth in an emphatic manner by those responsible for his education.
There is a false idea prevalent that a continent life is harmful. So far as continence relates to immaturity, it may be strongly and justly asserted that it is probably the most important factor in the conservation of health and strength. The retention of the procreative fluids, at a time when nature is opposed to their loss, enables the growing economy to utilize them in the conservation of nervous energy and virility. If a boy dissipates these energizing fluids, he deprives his body of the richest products which he is capable of manufacturing at a time when he needs every aid in the building up of a physically and mentally sound and vigorous constitution. There cannot exist a normal development if the body is deprived of the essential ingredients necessary to growth and mental vigor.
There was a time when young men were actually taught that sexual intercourse was necessary to develop full manhood. This was followed by a period of silence, which has practically extended to recent times. Both of these systems are pernicious. We know that sexual intercourse is not necessary to the development of mature normal manhood or womanhood. On the contrary, we know that continence, not incontinence, is an absolute essential to the growth of full sexual, virile maturity, as well as to the growth of efficient and healthy manhood and womanhood.
We must appeal to a boy's reason and show him the personal side of clean living. When he understands that to attain success in every department of human effort,—on the baseball and football fields, in the ring, in gymnastic contents, in examinations, in social intercourse, in trades and professions,—a continent life is the only means possible that promises success, he will give the appeal consideration.
We must employ all the safety devices possible to guard against the inclination of youth to wander. Regular exercise is one of the very best institutions in this respect. If we can instill into our boys a love of manlysports and encourage every effort in this direction, we will be doing much to minimize the growth of any tendency toward incontinence. We must provide the environment necessary to right living. The home should be attractive and we should permit the boy to have privileges even at the expense of the housekeeping decorum. His companions should be made welcome if they are the right kind of intimates, and the parents should enter into the life of the boy and try to look at "things" from his standpoint.
The Period of Procreative Power.—The procreative ability begins at puberty. There is no fixed period at which it may be said to end. From puberty until the period of physical maturity, it grows in vigor and it remains stationary until middle life, when it gradually declines. The standard of virility is unquestionably an individual problem. It depends upon the various factors that contribute to good health and longevity. It may be stated that the boy who abused his procreative function, during the period of immaturity, will not enjoy, during the mature period of his sexual life, a normal standard of vigor, nor will he carry the ability into old age, to the same relative degree, as he would, and as he had the innate promise to do—if he had led a normal continent existence. It may also be stated here that there is no effective remedial measures known, that will "bring back" the procreative ability if it is lost as a result of disobeying natural laws. Drugs and treatments by quacks to cure impotence are impositions and fakes. Money and time spent in the pursuit of this dream is money and time wasted.
Self-Abuse or Masturbation.—By self-abuse is meant the production of the venereal orgasm, with or without emission, by any means other than the natural union of the sexes.
It is a fact that the large majority of boys acquire the habit of self-abuse at some time. This is a very serious reflection upon parent, teacher, and physician, because it is through ignorance of the elementary principles of sex hygiene that this condition continues to exist. If they were warned against the possibility ofself-abuse arising in innocent ways, as well as in more reprehensible ways, they would exert their influence against its acquirement. If however a boy discovers accidentally a condition of which he was innocent, and of which he does not know the significance, it is human nature that he should investigate the phenomenon and in the end suffer as a consequence. In the effort to relieve some local irritation he may handle himself and be led into a dangerous practice. He does not know that the practice may have serious results—in fact he does not know he is doing anything wrong. Many boys have practically ruined their physical health and become morally irresponsible because no one—neither parent, teacher, physician, nor friend—told them of their danger. This is unjust, but great strides are being made in this direction and we may reasonably hope, that in the not far distant future, every boy will be plainly told the true facts about himself.
Most boys acquire this habit from other boys, but as we have intimated it is possible to acquire it in what are termed innocent ways. Sometimes the sensation which leads to it is discovered by sliding down banisters; or it may be that climbing trees or poles first awakens the feeling. Very young children are sometimes taught the vice by depraved nurses. Local irritation, as has been stated, may necessitate itching and handling the parts and in this way the vice is begun. The results are the same, no matter how the habit may have originated.
If the habit is persisted in, the muscular system suffers,—the muscles become weak and flabby; the patient develops weariness and languor and loses his mental and physical vigor. He is no longer forceful or energetic, his efficiency is impaired and as a consequence his nervous system begins to show signs of depleted strength. He cannot concentrate his thoughts, he falls behind in his studies, his mental effort is sluggish, he becomes diffident and shy, shuns society, loses confidence in himself, is morbid and emotional and may even think of suicide.
It is astonishing how indulgence in this habit may affect the moral nature of a boy. First of all, he is no longer frank and open. He becomes shifty andsuspicious and will not look you squarely in the face. A boy cannot become a slave to this habit without it affecting his mind. He invites debasing thoughts,—the old pure and clean method of thought and living no longer satisfy. His imagination even becomes corrupt and his moral nature and moral sense is perverted until he no longer seems to be able to tell the difference between right and wrong. He has little regard for the truth and if occasion demands it he will lie without appreciating the dishonorable part he is playing. In the end his will power is lost—even the effort to save himself is too feeble to succeed—he is a slave to the habit, his health and strength ruined.
If every boy could realize the possible end of this evil habit he would make an effort to rid himself of it before he becomes its victim and its slave. It may be easy to abandon the practice in the beginning. The longer he continues it, however, the less chance he has of finally mastering it, until, if he persists beyond a certain point, it is a matter of serious question whether he will ever be able to free himself from its grip. If the boy has lost the will power to carry out his resolves, no number of good desires or resolutions will avail. And it is just this will power that the wasting of the semen saps little by little away.
Treatment.—What can we do for these boys? Most of them can do much for themselves by simply stopping the practice. There are, of course, others who need careful management before the habit may be controlled and health restored. It is well to always remember to be tactful and patient and kind to these boys. Many of them are standing on the brink of despair, weak in body and weak in mind. They do not know where to turn to look for a friend—the right kind of a friend. It is a terrible thought that your own boy may be abjectly miserable in his own home because he is harboring a secret that is wrecking his health, and, though he may long for sympathy and a helping hand, neither his father nor mother have invited his confidence or spoken to him about these things. A watchful mother can usually tell when her boy becomes addicted to this habit.He will show it in his manner, he will not be free and open, he will want to be by himself. Later he will show the effects of the abusive treatment he is subjecting himself to in his appearance. He will be sunken-eyed, pimply-faced, pasty-skinned, shiftless, sneaking, silent, unmanly. No mother can fail to note these signs and she should suspect the cause and take steps to tactfully reach him before he has ruined his health absolutely.
We would advise regular exercise of a vigorous kind. Tire out the body so that sleep may be sound. Cold baths, followed by brisk rub-downs; no intoxicants, light meals, plenty of drinking water morning and night. The bowels should be regular every day. He should sleep alone on a hard bed in a well-aired room with light covering. He should keep busy every minute of the day and he should not think of himself at all.
The boy must realize that his salvation rests with himself. After he knows the real danger which the habit carries with it, he must be on his guard every moment to abstain. If he does not he may rest assured that the practice will ruin his health, render him, a business failure and deprive him of all happiness during the rest of his life.
Night Losses or "Wet-Dreams."—A so-called wet-dream is an unconscious emission of semen during sleep. The discharge may or may not be accompanied with an erotic dream.
After a certain age—which may be from the twelfth or fourteenth year—a boy may discover that he has discharged some substance during his sleep. He finds the discharge on his night clothes and it naturally puzzles him greatly. He may be entirely unconscious of the whole proceeding, having slept soundly during the night, or he may wake up to find the fluid actually discharging.
If a boy has not been told of this phenomenon he may regard it as a form of self-abuse of which he may have heard and as a consequence he may worry himself sick, as the night emissions continue to occur from time to time. Many pure-minded boys have been rendered miserable, and their efficiency and health have suffered asa result of just such an experience. It is, therefore, proper that they should fully understand the true significance of these occurrences.
Causes of Night Emissions.—I have explained how nature makes a man out of a boy. During this maturing process the testicles are very active organs—their function is to manufacture or secrete the fertilizing fluid or semen. This maturing process begins actively, as I stated, about the age of fifteen, though in some boys it frequently occurs earlier, sometimes as early as the twelfth year. When the testicle begins to grow at this time they manufacture more semen than the little pockets can hold, so nature adopts the method of permitting the surplus to escape during sleep. These night emissions, therefore, are perfectly natural losses, and need cause absolutely no distress of mind whatever. The frequency with which they may occur depends altogether upon the temperament of the boy. If the boy is a strong, active, athletic boy, they may not be so frequent in him as they may be in a quiet, studious boy. The system of the athletic boy seems to utilize more of this surplus than the quieter existence of the studious boy calls for. If the discharge does not occur oftener than once every two weeks, it may be regarded as normal and natural. Should they become more frequent than this, the boy should inform his mother or father and the family physician should be consulted. It may be that he is in need of a tonic, or special instructions regarding his method of living and his mode of exercising. Whatever the cause may be, it can be corrected, and the best plan is to give it attention as soon as it is noted that the losses are too frequent.
Sexual Excesses.—It is well known to the medical profession that the marital relation is frequently practiced to excess. The same indictment may be passed on what may be termed extra-marital relations. No one has ever formulated a general sexual standard which could be safely regarded as normal. Too many individual conditions of temperament and health enter into the proposition to permit of a standard being formulated. It must, therefore, be regarded as an individual questionto be adjusted, if necessary, by the family physician. What may safely be regarded as normal and harmless in one, constitutes, for many reasons, excess in another. When a man performs hard physical or mental labor, his sexual aptitude or capacity is limited, and this limitation cannot be exceeded without risk. Such a limitation may not constitute an excess in a man whose occupation does not call for a great expenditure of physical or mental energy. Any indulgence which produces exhaustion is excessive.
The age of the individual has undoubtedly much to do with his sexual endurance. A young, virile adult will tolerate a sexual expenditure which would seriously affect the health and vigor of an older man.
Environment and inclination are factors in determining the standard of some people. If the marital relations are participated in simply to preserve peace and harmony in the home, they are productive of harm even if indulged in moderately.
The symptoms of sexual excess are much the same as those of self-abuse. To a certain extent, however, they are favorably influenced, because the conditions under which the relationship is practiced are natural, because the participants are matured physically, and because there is no element of worry over the probable effects.
Sexual excess defeats its own purpose, because it engenders a lack of desire and consequently it is to a certain extent a self-limiting process. We must also remember that excess entails consequences just as the breaking of any natural law is followed by retribution of some kind. In these cases we find that discomfort follows excess. The parts become irritated and congested and disease of the prostate gland always follows.
Treatment.—Stop the excess by self-control and self-restraint. Employ all the aids dictated by an intelligent perusal of the laws of sex hygiene. Preserve the general health. It may be necessary to resort to local treatment, because, if the parts have been abused by excessive indulgence, there is always more or less irritation and congestion present. This condition affects the nerves, suggestive reflex sensations are produced by a congestedprostate and the patient becomes morbid. It is essential for such patients to consult a physician whose local treatment will stop the sensitiveness in the parts and relieve him so that he may carry out his programme of restoration unhampered by conditions which are only amenable to local treatment.
What Parents Should Know About the So-Called "Social Evil" Before Speaking With Authority to "The Boy."—To be qualified to speak with authority, or convincingly, to a boy upon sex hygiene, the parents must be familiar with, and well versed in the subject. The facts related in the preceding pages must be thoroughly understood. No parent can study these facts intelligently without being impressed with the importance of the subject; without realizing that it is absolutely essential that the fundamental principles of sex hygiene should be taught to the rising generation; without acknowledging the tremendous part for evil which prudery and ignorance play in the education of youth; and without being convinced that most of the evil is the product of ignorance on the part of the boy, and that parents are in a large sense to blame if they fail to impart the necessary knowledge in time.
The need for enlightenment in sexual matters is a product of existing conditions. Civilization and the social environment are developing along a plane which subjects the youth to temptations that practically did not exist in the past. There is a broader and looser code of ethics. Business monopolizes the entire time of the father, and social and political unrest and misdirected ambition distracts the mother. The son or daughter has a wider latitude and a freer reign than they once had. The opportunities for promiscuous intimacies are easier, and the public conveniences and utilities lend themselves to the designs of evil-intentioned and loose-moraled women. The ease of travel, the laxity of laws, the theater, with its unchaste and indecent plays, the moving picture snows, the vaudeville resorts, whose highest priced "talent" is some voluptuous female, who has cultivated the art of draping nudity with suggestiveness and singing immoral songs, all tend to give youth a false impressionof the reality of life and to make the path of the degenerate easy and profitable. The rich are growing richer, and their children are pampered and overfed and underrestrained. Time hangs heavily on their hands and their only mental effort is to devise new methods and new ways of satisfying the lust of liberty and overstimulated desire. The poor are growing poorer, and to "keep in the ring," to live and dress beyond their means as many do, it is necessary to have an unexacting standard of morals. In this way the promiscuous libertine is evolved,—the most insidious and dangerous product of present day civilization, and the most pernicious factor in the spread of immoral impulses and indecent diseases.
Parents must accept these institutions and agencies as necessary instruments of evil and adopt measures to nullify their attractiveness. Eternal vigilance is the price of success, but the quality of the vigilance must be dictated by love, not by suspicion and distrust.
When the parent can convince the boy that the knowledge is imparted, not with the intention of depriving him of what he may construe as his natural liberties and rights, but with the single intention of adding to the sum total of his pleasure and success, he will look more kindly upon any proposition that suggests a course of conduct that leads to clean living. Sex hygiene will eventually find a natural place in the scheme of education. It will be taught to male and female alike. In the meantime, however, we must begin by educating the educators—the parents. In the beginning, their task will not be easy. There will be much to overcome, much ignorance, prudery, false modesty, hypocrisy; there will be much vicious teaching and evil example to live down. But we cannot hope to achieve results in the noblest cause, save by patient, intelligent, and persistent effort and by self-sacrifice and a constant enthusiasm. The aim is to tell all,—all the truth,—so that we may never be assailed by the cry, "No one told me, I did not know," from the loved lips of son or daughter gone astray.
The Father and the Boy.—The right kind of father can always find the time and the way to awaken in the heart of the boy the spirit of companionship. No boyliving will resent the fellowship of the right kind of father. It depends upon the father! If the spirit of chumminess does not exist between you and your boy, you are at fault, you have made a mistake, you have missed your opportunity, you "did not go about it in the right way and in the right spirit." Try again—it may not be too late.
The father who adopts the habit of taking his boys (and his girls too) out for long walks, at least every Sunday, and who spends an hour with them every evening—is the right kind of father. One who has never tested the merit of walks with children cannot possibly appreciate the enjoyment and benefit that can accrue from them. It is not only the physical good that results, nor the inspiration which one may draw from nature, but the concrete advantages that come from the fellowship with the children are a new and a real experience—this is what counts. You will have opportunities of sewing seeds in their minds that will grow into a harvest that will astonish you. Children in the right mood—and they are in the right mood when they are happy, and they are happy out in the open with an interesting companion—are alert, and responsive, and eager to be told "things," and this mood can be put to marvelous use by the "right kind of father." The father who wanders forth with the fixed purpose of thinking out some business problem during the walk and permits the children to find their own amusement is the wrong kind of father. He must choose to be a child again, he must desire to please them, he must make an effort to be in harmony with them, he must draw on his experience to interest them, he must talk to them entertainingly of every interesting problem which the walk itself suggests or he must formulate a plan and select a subject with a definite educational scheme in view. We can, in a most effective way, begin to build their characters, and, by the right kind of talk and enthusiasm, he can determine their resolves to be honest, truthful, just, clean, sympathetic. He can instill into them, in a thousand different ways, the determination and inspiration to succeed. It is a wonderful and a precious chance, and it will make the "right kind of father" more just,more sympathetic, more optimistic, and it will make him young again and more successful. Try it.
Implant in the hearts of your children a love of home, make the evening meal and hour by the fireside a period of congenial fellowship, when all the little irritable ruffles of the day may be ironed out and swept away. The secret is to be intimate. Tell them the secret of success from your standpoint, how happiness is gained only by being efficient and successful, and that, to be efficient, one must be energetic and healthy. Drum into their ears the truth that life is a battle, and only the brave "win out," and health is the one essential necessity. It is astonishing how such talks will impress young minds. They will remind you of things you said, that made a lasting impression on them, long after you have forgotten the incident.
A father can, in this way, by talking of the future to his boy, convey to him the high hopes he entertains of the great success the boy is going to achieve—you establish a standard in the boy's mind, and he unconsciously hopes to attain that standard. If you have impressed him with the necessity of preserving his health and strength, as an essential to success, he will be slow to yield to any temptation that may interfere with his plans. This reasoning may sound quixotic to some people, but it is the truth. Many a boy has been inspired to success by the knowledge that his mother or father believed in him, and was confident he would be a leader. He strove to justify the pride and confidence of those who held him dear, and he won out.
To retain his health, therefore, is the first impulse to be conveyed to the boy. When he recognizes this truth, it is an easy task to instill a love of exercise, gymnastics, swimming, fresh air, cleanliness and temperance in him. If these are attained, you will have tided him over the tendency to self-abuse, and you will have rendered him less likely to yield to evil suggestion or temptation. His confidence in you will be whole-hearted and implicit. You can do anything with him at the psychological moment. It is now time to talk of more intimate matters. Carefully and tactfully, the father approaches the fundamental truths of sex hygiene.
The selection of a subject for a text as a means from which to advance toward the real facts is sometimes of importance. It must not appear as though the subject was designedly chosen. If it follows in a natural way it will more thoroughly interest the boy and he will have swallowed a large dose of truth before he is impressed with the personal viewpoint. A passing trotting horse has served me a number of times for intimate talks with boys on heredity and kindred subjects. I invite the boy to watch how the horse uses his legs, and how rhythmically and beautifully he places his feet, and how his whole attitude serves the end for which he is exerting himself—to gain speed. Tell the boy the story of how professional breeders have achieved such marvelous results; how for generations the "strain" has been kept clean and pure, how any descendant of a great sire, who showed any habit detrimental to the development of the highest racing qualities—no matter how trivial the disability might be—was cast aside, experience having taught that it does not pay to waste effort and time on any horse whose physical or mental characteristics are not up to the highest standard. Such a horse will not win, and it is only "wins" that count.
Change the subject to human beings. Tell him how the race maintains its standard; but show him the difference between the methods employed. How the horse has his mate selected because of the female's good qualities, so that the offspring may possess like qualities, if not better, and that the selection is made by men who know their business, and have had long experience in the work. How, on the other hand, a young man with no experience is permitted to choose any woman he may fancy irrespective of her qualifications. As a consequence, we have all kinds of children, good and bad, feeble and strong, honest and dishonest, some degenerates from birth, some criminal, and many diseased and inefficient, few of them "winners." It is an easy matter to preach a little sermon from this text. Show him how essential it is to select the mother of one's children wisely, to know if there is disease in the future wife's blood, if her family history is good, if her temperament is suited to his, if herdomestic qualities are satisfactory, if her principles are moral and normal, and if she understands and appreciates the true object and function of marriage. Show him also the element of justice involved in the marriage contract; that he must give what he exacts, that if he expects a healthy and normal wife, he must be healthy and normal himself; if he expects purity and cleanliness he must give purity and cleanliness; if he expects to mate with a fit female he must be an efficient and fit male. Remember that every act, deed, thought, and aspiration is regulated by laws which one cannot fool with, or disobey, without reaping a harvest which will conquer, crush and ruin you, no matter how clever or smart you may think yourself.
Show him the wisdom of the breeders' habit of never permitting sexual liberties in a too young stallion. For the same reason the boy must conserve his strength and virility for the marriage state and for the function of procreation.
In a further talk, the father may extend this subject and gradually lead up to the "consequences" of the unclean life. The boy will be ready for this talk and will evince an interest in it that will be encouraging and promising.
The talk about the science of mating the horses he will understand readily and thoroughly, and he will not fail to see the point when you switch to man and apply the same principles. Then when you show how mismating is responsible for poor children quality and how disease accounts for feeble-minded and degenerate offspring, he will be fairly well posted, and he will be ready to imbibe more details, and you will have done much of your duty. His curiosity will be quickened and his interest is awakened. It depends upon the father. If your boy is honest and clean, open and decent, he will not fall without a fight, and while he is fighting he is maturing. If your picture of the consequences of the venereal diseases has been effective and vivid, he will grow up with a healthy horror of them. If your conduct as a father has been wise and exemplary, and if your home has the right kind of environment, and the right kind of mother in it, youhave done all a father can do to help the boy over the rough spots. The proper kind of encouragement and the right kind of vigilance, and books which will satisfy the boy's craving for more knowledge along this line is all that is needed to help the boy to "win out."
Fake Medical Treatment for Venereal Diseases.—Parents should in every possible way discourage the use of patent medicines and fake medical methods of curing these diseases. Untold harm has been done to boys and to women by these nostrums.
In every instance the motive underlying the methods of people selling these things is to frighten the patients into the belief that their condition is more serious than it is in order to justify a long and expensive course of treatment.
Their work is carelessly performed, and frequently they are directly responsible for the development of complication and dangerous sequelæ. The promises of speedy cures are false, and, not infrequently, methods of black-mailing have been known to follow an expensive and unsuccessful course of treatment.
There is no class of disease in which the help and honesty of the legitimate medical profession is needed more than in the treatment of the venereal diseases. Parents should see to it that the family physician is prescribing any strange medicine that may appear in the boy's room, and not some unknown individual who may be an impostor and a blackmailer.
Sowing Wild Oats.—Writers of fiction and others of a more serious trend of thought have recognized the sowing of wild oats as an institution which, if it does not merit the full approval of society's moral code, is, at least, tolerated. No serious consequences befall the offender. On the contrary, the libertine is the type of hero who receives the commendatory quips of erotic dames and the questionable interest of hysterical maidens.
Women of easy morals are always willing to espouse the cause of the "black sheep," and to further the matrimonial success of the penitentroué. Many mothers are willing to marry their daughters to the polished villain of society, who is known as a rake and debauchee, if hisfamily connections are desirable. It has been even held that a youth who did not "sow his wild oats" was of doubtful stamina.
That many able men have sown wild oats is indisputable, and that many men who are respectful husbands, have also gone "through the mill" is also true, but this need not blind us to the fact that thousands upon thousands, who could have been successful men of affairs and creditable husbands and fathers, have been utterly ruined, as a result of having sown wild oats. No man is a better man because of a past record of licentious habits. The man who sows and escapes the harvest is lucky. The man who reaps, reaps in abundance. Most men regret the lapses of youth. Most of these lapses would never have occurred if the impulse could have been governed by the reasoning of maturity. These acts are the promptings of an impetuosity which may be entirely foreign to the individual's innate character, but brought out by promiscuous circumstances and the ignorance and license of youth. If we can protect youth, by an adequate knowledge of the consequences, we will furnish the means to tide over the impressionable period. Until a healthy maturity of judgment will assume the task unaided.
The effects of the wild oats' theory are too tragically evident to need any argumentative refutation. The statistics of the prevalency of venereal diseases alone is sufficient; the results of these diseases are more than enough.
Study the records of the jails and prisons, courts and asylums, hospitals and health resorts, think of the hundreds of thousands of diseased and deformed and mentally inferior children, of the multitude of paretics, melancholies, ataxics, maniacs, syphilitics,—all the products of "wild oats,"—and ask if the wild oats' theory is justifiable.
Think of the ruined homes, the wretched lives of fallen women, the hopeless prayers of abandoned wives, the loneliness and misery of parents neglected and forgotten, the "bastards" and fatherless children, the drunkards and criminals and tramps—all weeds of the wild oats' harvest.
Then reflect upon the tragedies, the suicides of the betrayed and of the diseased, the bank thief, the broken hearts of deserted and hungry children, the army of inefficients—around whose necks hang wild oats' medals, the men of big business, who constantly fight the effects of early incontinence and abuse, and the thousands who go to early graves, and then ask, in all justice, if the sowing of wild oats needs justification.
Who supports the thousands of prostitutes? Who made them? Wherever you find pauperism, crime, drunkenness, insanity, idleness, immorality, vice and disease, you will find that the sower of wild oats has traveled the path and left his stain and his footprints there.
Should Circumcision be Advised?—The answer to the above question is "Yes," in every instance. If circumcision is done early,—during the first two weeks of life,—the operation is without danger and practically without pain. In quite a considerable percentage of all males, circumcision is an absolute necessity. For excellent medical reasons, about which your family physician can inform you, every boy should be circumcised.
What a Mother Should Tell Her Little Girl—Where Do Babies Come From—How Baby Birds and Fish Come from Eggs—How Other Animals Have Little Nests of Their Own—The Duty of Mothers to Instruct and Direct—What a Mother Should Tell Her Daughter—Every Mother Should Regard This Duty as Sacred—Every Female Child is a Possible Future Mother—Motherhood the Highest Function of the Sex—Health the One Necessary Essential—Symptoms of the First, or Beginning Menstruation—The Period of Puberty in the Female—Changes in the Reproductive Organs at Puberty—The Female Generative Organs—The Function of the Reproductive Organs—The Age of Puberty in the Female—The Function of the Ovary—The Function of the Womb—Why Menstruation Occurs Every Twenty-eight Days—The Male or Papa Egg—The Function of the Spermatozoa—"Tell the Whole Story"—"How do These Spermatozoa Get There"—The Union of the Species—"How Can a Baby Live in There for Such a Long Time"—How the Baby Gets its Nourishment in the Womb—Girls Must Not Become Mothers.
What a Mother Should Tell Her Little Girl—Where Do Babies Come From—How Baby Birds and Fish Come from Eggs—How Other Animals Have Little Nests of Their Own—The Duty of Mothers to Instruct and Direct—What a Mother Should Tell Her Daughter—Every Mother Should Regard This Duty as Sacred—Every Female Child is a Possible Future Mother—Motherhood the Highest Function of the Sex—Health the One Necessary Essential—Symptoms of the First, or Beginning Menstruation—The Period of Puberty in the Female—Changes in the Reproductive Organs at Puberty—The Female Generative Organs—The Function of the Reproductive Organs—The Age of Puberty in the Female—The Function of the Ovary—The Function of the Womb—Why Menstruation Occurs Every Twenty-eight Days—The Male or Papa Egg—The Function of the Spermatozoa—"Tell the Whole Story"—"How do These Spermatozoa Get There"—The Union of the Species—"How Can a Baby Live in There for Such a Long Time"—How the Baby Gets its Nourishment in the Womb—Girls Must Not Become Mothers.
What a Mother Should Tell Her Little Girl.—Every little girl should be told the Story of Life by her mother. It should be told in simple language, so that the little girl will understand. Very early in life the little girl will be prompted to inquire of her mother "Where do babies come from?" It is wrong to give an evasive reply to this natural inquiry or to postpone telling the story, because they will be told it by playmates and will receive very wrong and very crude impressions of this wonderful subject.
Every mother knows enough of life to tell her little girl its story in a way that will impress her with the sacredness of God's beautiful reproductive plan. She should begin by telling her a story about how the birds live. How at a certain season of the year they choose a mateand go housekeeping. They build a nest, and when it is all nicely finished, the mother bird lays her eggs. Then the papa and mamma bird take turns and sit on the eggs to keep them warm, and after a time the egg breaks and a little bird is born into the world. They feed the little baby birds until their feathers grow, and when they are old enough they fly away from their home and begin life by themselves.
Many questions will be asked as the mother tells the story in her own words, and the correct answers to these questions will fill in all the difficult-to-understand points. The story of how the fish lay eggs in shallow water so that the sun may keep them warm and hatch them out will interest also. Be careful to impress upon them that there is always a mamma and a papa, a male and a female bird and fish,—that this is necessary because God made it so, and we must obey His wish. When the little girl fully understands the story of the egg bird, and egg fish, the mother can tell how the Creator thought out a different plan for other animals like the dog, horse, lion, elephant, and cow. He knew that it would neither be safe nor possible for these animals to stay at home long enough to sit on eggs and hatch their babies, so he made a nest for them inside of their bodies. There they would be warm and would always be with their mammas no matter what they were doing. So we come to the answer to their question: "Where do babies come from?"
These interesting stories, according to the intelligence and sincerity of the mother, can be taken advantage of, to impress the little girl with the importance of many of the lessons of life. For example, her attention can be drawn to the fact that man and woman are the highest types of living things that God made. No other living thing, animal, or fish, or bird, or tree, or flower, can talk, and think, and reason as man and woman can. Because of this faculty—to think and reason—the human family are always trying to find out what can be done with all the other things God made. We try to find out what the different rocks are good for; what the different trees are good for, and the different kinds of earth, and animals, and birds, and fishes, and everything in the world. Westudy these, and we learn much, and we are made happier and more comfortable by what we learn. For example, by studying horses, and feeding and breeding them carefully, and training them, and caring for them, we can make stronger horses and better and faster horses; by studying trees, and planting them in soil best suited to them, and giving them plenty of water to drink, we can compel these trees to grow better apples and pears and peaches. In the same way we can produce better strawberries, and oranges, and grapes, and we can grow flowers with sweeter smells and prettier colors. We do all this by training these animals and trees to grow a certain way, to eat certain food, to drink pure water, and we protect them from the cold and sometimes from the sun if it is too hot. Our faculty to think and reason has taught us just what is good for them, and we compel them to obey our laws. As a result they become strong and more healthy. Now show the little girl how important she is; how much more precious she is than a tree, or animal, or flower, and how much more necessary it is that we, mammas and papas, should use our ability to think and reason in her interest. Show her how we have found out all about babies and little girls and how we know just what to do to make strong and healthy, and pure, and good, and clean men and women of all the little boys and girls in the world. Tell her that this is what mother is doing now, training her and compelling her to do the things that will make her a strong and a good mother when she grows older. Let her distinctly understand that it is the duty of mothers to instruct and to correct their little daughters when they do any wrong. Mothers know, because they have had experience in these matters, and they know just how a little girl must live, and dress, and eat, and behave, in order to be strong and pure, and good. So when mother reproves and corrects, it is because she knows that what you are doing to merit a correction is not for your ultimate good. Show them that all young things, and young animals, and young babies, and young girls, must be compelled to obey certain rules and laws, otherwise they would not grow up to be strong and healthy. Sometimes a rose bush grows up amongstones and weeds, but it never thrives, it is always more or less sick. It does not grow strong, its flowers are poor little sickly things compared to the roses on a bush that is planted in proper soil, and carefully tended and pruned, and watered. So would the little girl turn out if she grew up in bad company and did not have a mother to guard and guide her,—to prune her when she was growing careless. Everything in this world has a meaning, and when mother tells you that you must not do a certain thing you very much want to do, she has a very good reason for telling you not to do it. You may not know the reason, but you should have confidence in your mother, you should believe that she knows what is best, and that she would not inflict pain or cause you suffering unless she knew it was for your good. The young horse does not understand why a halter is put around its neck and is made to run around in a circle until it is tired. It would much rather enjoy itself in its own care-free, and happy way. And when finally a full set of harness is put on, and it is put into the shafts of a wagon and tied there, and made to pull it and its driver many weary miles the horse does not like it, and he rebels strenuously. He is, however, compelled to obey in the end, and he finally consents to become a useful horse.
It is exactly the same way with every little boy and girl. We are put into this world for a certain purpose, and we must all work. Now parents know this, and they know just how to prepare little girls and boys for this work. They therefore ask them to do many things that are not pleasant or agreeable but which must be done in order to prepare them for the work ahead.
Your daughter is now about fourteen years of age. She is about to pass from girlhood to womanhood and she should know more of life's story. The mother will now tell her the complete story in the form of little talks, based upon the following facts as texts. Each mother will doubtless add to the story as conditions justify and as the education of the mother and daughter may dictate. A multitude of little side talks can be wisely indulged into make clear any uncertain or doubtful explanation, and every one of these incidental excursions can be made exceedingly interesting if wisely and opportunely chosen. Always remember, however, to emphasize the sacredness of the story. Do not permit your daughter to get the impression that you are telling her something that simply has to be told, just as you told her the correct way to boil an egg. Let her realize and get the impression that this is the most serious and most wonderfully interesting story in existence, the most important story she will ever hear. Let her understand that motherhood, for which she is now preparing, is the duty God assigned her in this world: that that duty must be carried out, and that she must do nothing, nor leave anything undone, to interfere with its accomplishment. Do not only impress her with the story itself, but let your own explanation be so emphatically serious, that she will deeply appreciate its momentous significance—an occasion to be remembered all her life.
If she gets the proper impression from you at this time she will never treat the subject lightly, or permit it to be promiscuously discussed within her hearing.
Begin by telling her that she is about to enter the most important period of her life. Explain why this is so in the following way, in your own words. If we admit every female child to be a future mother, and motherhood the highest function possible to the sex, then the awakening of the sex organs and the mother instinct, must be the most important developmental episode in the life story of every woman. If this is so, then it follows that every girl should enter this period in the very best physical health possible, in order to reap the best results incident to this evolutionary period. We impress and warn her, therefore, that, as her system is about to undergo important changes, she must be particularly careful of her health. A little mistake at this time may be followed by more serious consequences than if made at any other time in her life. If a girl is to become a mother, certain changes must occur in her body before the nest, of which we previously wrote, can be made ready. God did not overlook anything when He peopled the earth; He thereforewisely planned that these changes in the female should occur at a time when the girl is strong and healthy.
The Period of Puberty in the Female. Symptoms of Beginning Menstruation.—At about the age of fourteen these changes begin to give evidence of existence. They affect the girl's whole system and the mother must be especially patient and sympathetic. Her disposition may change, she may want to be alone, and she may be more or less melancholy. She will be dissatisfied with the things that previously interested her. She will tire easily, and she may have many spasmodic pains from time to time. The wise mother will tactfully see that she takes plenty of nourishing food and systematic exercise, and that she gets enough sleep in a well-aired room. There are other physical changes which are observable at this age. The girl grows taller, the figure broadens out, the hips widen, the bust enlarges, and the waist line increases in size. These are all part of the great change from girlhood to womanhood.
Changes in the Reproductive Organs.—The principal change takes place in the reproductive organs themselves, and it is very essential that she should have a clear mental picture of just what is meant by "reproductive" organs and their location in her body. We mean by this term the group of organs which are concerned in creating and nourishing a child until it is old enough to be born into the world.
The Female Generative Organs.—These organs are the womb or uterus, two ovaries, two fallopian tubes and the vagina. The womb or uterus is the "nest." It is about the size of and is shaped like a pear. It is hollow, however, though its walls are quite thick. The ovaries are about the size of a peach stone and lie at the side of the womb,—one on either side. The fallopian tubes connect the ovaries with the womb. The vagina connects the womb with the outside world,—it is sometimes known as the birth canal. In the very lowest part of the abdomen, or belly, in front, is the bladder, which collects the urine until it is necessary to pass it out. In the back part of this region is the rectum; it collects all the undigested food, etc., from the intestinal canal.Between these two,—the bladder and rectum,—we find the reproductive organs, the womb, ovaries and vagina, described above.
The Function of the Reproductive Organs.—It will be difficult, even for mothers, to acquire a clear understanding of the function of the reproductive or generative organs. It is an exceedingly interesting process, however, and it is well worth a patient, attentive study to clearly understand the brief description we give of it. If you acquire a distinct mental picture of the problem you will be able to tell your daughter a story that will be of intense interest to her, and a tale that is interesting is impressive and is productive of thought and reflection. That is the condition of mind we want daughters to be in when they hear this story.
The human ovaries begin to prepare themselves for their life work when the girl is about eight years of age. When they are ripe, or ready to perform this duty, the girl menstruates for the first time. This is known as the age of "puberty," which implies that she has developed, passed from girlhood into womanhood. After having reached the age of puberty it is possible to become a mother.
The Age of Puberty.—There is no fixed age at which the first menstruation takes place. Some girls develop quicker than others,—a condition that depends upon the health and type of girl. A strong, robust, full-blooded girl will menstruate at an earlier age, than will a sickly anemic girl. The average age is fourteen years, though there is no reason to worry if a girl does not menstruate for a number of years later. In warm climates the age of puberty is from two to four years earlier than in more temperate climates.
The Function of the Ovary.—Just what takes place in each ovary when it is ripe is best explained by likening an ovary to an orange,—though of course the ovary is very much smaller than an orange, as was previously noted. If you make a cut in an orange and squeeze it, you express some of its juice and most likely you will also express one or more seeds. The seeds of the ovaries are called "ovules," and the process by which it expressesthem is called "ovulation." Of course there is no actual squeezing of the ovary,—the ovules grow in the ovary, and as they ripen they come to the surface, and when actually ripe, the part of the surface of the ovary to which they come, opens up (like a flower unfolding when in bloom), and they fall out. The ovule we may regard as the human female egg, and one ripens and falls out every twenty-eight days.
When the egg falls out of the ovary it falls into the tube which carries it into the womb. This tube you will remember is called the fallopian tube. The ovule or egg is now in the cavity of the womb where we will leave it for the present.
The Function of the Womb.—While these changes are going on in the ovary, the womb is also preparing itself for its share of the work. The lining or internal surface of the womb is composed of mucous membrane, much the same as the interior lining of the mouth and throat. This lining becomes congested with blood, and is so intensely swollen at the time when the ovule or egg reaches the womb, that it is ready to rupture and bleed all over its surface. Just whether it will rupture and bleed, depends upon whether the egg is going to grow into a child or not. If it is not going to grow into a child, it immediately bleeds freely, and continues to bleed, until the whole lining of the womb and egg is passed out into the outer world. This takes four or five days and constitutes "menstruation." After menstruation is over, the womb begins again to prepare itself for the coming of the next ovule or egg, and as this occurs every twenty-eight days, menstruation is commonly termed the "monthly periods."
Why Menstruation Occurs Every Twenty-Eight Days.—The reason why the womb does this every twenty-eight days is because it is impossible to tell just when the womb will be called upon to nourish and support a child. If it did not get rid of the old blood, it would not be in a healthy condition to nourish and take care of a baby, nor would its interior be ready to supply new fresh blood for the growth of the infant. Hence nature constructs and builds a new "nest" in the interiorof the womb each month. It very much resembles the new home into which the bride and groom, go to begin housekeeping.
When you told your little girl the story of life, you particularly drew her attention to the important fact that every living thing is created by the union of a male and female principle, and, therefore, has a mamma and papa. This applies to trees, flowers, vegetables, fish, animals, birds, insects,—every living thing, including human beings. We have seen that the ovule from the ovary is the female egg, or principle. It is the part the female contributes toward the future child. Before a child is possible, however, the ovule must meet the egg from the male.
The Male or Papa Egg.—The male or papa egg is called a "spermatozoa." It reaches the interior of the womb through the lower opening, which you will remember opens into the vagina. Emphasize to your daughter that the female ovule or egg, and the male egg, or spermatozoa, are minute objects, so microscopically small that a hundred million of them could comfortably lie upon a ten-cent piece.
The Function of the Spermatozoa.—God gave the male spermatozoa the power to move. To watch them under the microscope you would imagine you were looking into a bowl of water, in which there were hundreds of little fish all squirming around. But the most wonderful thing about them is, they can only move in an upward direction,—they seemingly cannot move downward, or sideways. If you think for a moment you will understand why God gave them this marvelous property. When the male semen is deposited in the female vagina, there are thousands of these minute, living, moving spermatozoa in it. The womb is above the vagina, and the female egg is in the womb, consequently, to reach this egg, the spermatozoa must travel upward. To travel in any other direction would be fruitless energy. There is only one female egg, but there are thousands of male eggs, or spermatozoa; it is easy, therefore, to comprehend how one of these spermatozoa should exactly be in line with the female egg in its upward path, since there are somany of them. It is only necessary that one should meet the female egg in order to impregnate it.
The shape of the male principle, or spermatozoa, is exactly like a little tadpole, and you no doubt recall that a tadpole has a minute tail, the movement of which enables it to swim around. So has the spermatozoa, and by the incessant movement of this microscopic tail they all move upward as soon as discharged by the male. I told you that God gave the male-germ life. It is necessary now to explain the character of this life. It is very brief; it is estimated that they are active for two hours, and then become inactive, or die. The best way to explain the brief activity to your daughter, is to liken the spermatozoa, to a mechanical toy, which is wound up to go for a certain time. After it runs out it becomes inactive; this is exactly what happens to the little human tadpole. If during this brief life none of them has happened to reach the female egg, pregnancy does not take place and menstruation occurs. On the other hand, if this were not so,—if these spermatozoa were active for a longer period, pregnancy would almost be certain to take place every time the womb was not already occupied with a pregnancy.
Tell the Whole Story.—When a mother reaches this stage of the wondrous tale she will be asked by an innocent girl,—"How do these spermatozoa get there?" or, "You have not told me where these tadpoles came from" or, "I don't understand how these spermatozoa got into the vagina" or, "I don't know why you call these the male egg when they are in mamma." It does not matter how it is expressed, the intent is plain enough. I have said, that an innocent girl will ask this question, the implication being that one who is not innocent will refrain from asking this question. A girl who knows the answer will not ask, because, if she is familiar with this subject before her mother thinks it wise and proper to tell her, she obtained her information from a source which, most likely, insinuated a suggestive, or evil, meaning into the explanation, consequently she would be afraid, or ashamed, to ask the question. An innocent girl, on the other hand, would rightly ask for information whichis obviously kept back, and which she has a right to know, since a complete, and intelligent understanding of the story depends upon the elucidation asked. If it is proper to tell part of the story, it is essential to tell all of it. Tell it in your own words in this way:
When God conceived the human race He ensured its perpetuation by designing a method whereby this would be rendered possible: He did more; He wisely decided that the function, involving the very existence of the human race, should be attended with a sentient gratification. He further instilled into the fundamental economy of mankind, sex attraction, which is involuntary, undeniable, and unquenchable. If God conceived the means and the method, no human mind in possession of its faculties should see evil where it does not exist. It was by Him designed that the male organ of reproduction should deposit its germinating fluid in the vagina of the female, and this is accomplished by a union of species.
The one set of reproductive organs is a complement of the other, and essential to the other. It is by this act that the male spermatozoa is enabled to complete the function of fecundation.
If now we assume the male and female element to have met and united, menstruation does not take place. The egg or embryo (the future child) begins to grow, and it remains in the womb for two hundred and eighty days from the day when the male and female egg met. It is quite natural for an intelligent girl to ask her mother to explain, "How a baby can live in there for such a long time," or "What makes it grow if it does not get anything to eat or drink."
How the Baby Gets its Nourishment in the Womb.—These questions can be answered in this way. While the baby is in its little comfortable home it gets everything it needs. You are in your home now. If you wanted a drink, what would you do? Wouldn't you go to the water faucet and draw a glass of water? The water comes to you through a pipe, right into your home, you don't have to go out of the house to get it. And if you wanted light when it is dark you would turn on the gas and light it. It, too, comes into your home througha pipe. Now baby gets its air; and food, and all it needs to drink in just that way. There are two little pipes which go into its nest or home, and then into the baby's body at the navel, and through these pipes fresh blood runs in and out. When mother breathes, her blood sucks up oxygen from the air in her lungs, and the blood carries oxygen to every part of her body. In this way, all parts are supplied with the proper quantity of air. Now the baby is simply a new part of mamma as long as it is in its nest in her body, so it too gets air in this way. When mother eats, the food is taken into her stomach and it is there changed into liquid and so prepared, that when it passes into the intestines, the part of the food that is good for her, is sucked up into the blood, and the blood carries it to every part of her body. It distributes whatever is needed to all parts, and as the baby is a part, it gets its share. The other pipe carries the blood back again, out of the baby for new supplies, and as this is going on all the time, there is no danger of the baby starving in any way, or at any time.
When your daughter understands this, show her how important it is that mothers should be in good health, otherwise the baby will not get good food, it will not be properly nourished and will be born a poor, little sickly child. Little girls, consequently, should try to eat properly, exercise regularly, and do everything their mothers tell them, so that when they become mothers, they will be able to nourish their babies and not bring into the world poor little starved infants.
Girls Must not Become Mothers.—We have previously stated that girls can become mothers when they have reached the age of puberty. God did not intend, however, that girls at the age of twelve or fourteen should become mothers, because their bodies are not strong enough, nor are they fully grown, nor have they the experience, to undertake the physical task and responsibility of bringing a baby into the world. We know this from experience, because we have seen the sickly babies such girls have, and we have seen how much these girl mothers suffer, and how they ruin their health, by trying to do what God did not intend they should do.Even the trees teach us this lesson. An orange tree will bring out buds, which would develop into oranges, when it is two years old. The experienced farmer, however, will pluck these buds off, and will do so every year, till the tree is five years old. If he allowed the tree to bear fruit during its young years, the oranges would not be good, or sweet, or large; so he waits until the tree has grown and is strong and healthy, when its fruit will be large and sweet. An orange tree of this type will have better fruit, and will continue to produce this good variety for many years. A tree allowed to bear fruit when two years old will never have first class oranges, nor will it continue to have, even poor oranges, as long as the other.