"My lord," said I, as warm as may be, "see in what my position stands. I am come here, penetrating to your very fireside. I stake my head upon the risk. 'Tis in your office to sound a word, and these fellows will take me forth upon a capital charge of treason. I have cast my die for the good cause. Yet my death, which would be an evil to me in that case, would profit you nothing, my lord—nay, less than nothing in the coming trouble."
Again he paused. "The Chief Justice of this realm does not parley with treason," said he.
But I had a glimpse of the man now; I saw what fear ran in his blood; he would nothave kept me haggling there if he had it not in his heart to coquet with fortune.
"My lord," I said, "and who would credit that a poor highwayman talked of state politics with the Lord Chief Justice? Why, a gallows and the topsman would serve his turn."
He heaved a little sigh, fidgeting with his fingers. "Who the devil are you?" he asked. "You are taken for a padsman."
"My lord," said I, "'tis strange company a man may keep for a purpose. I will not deny that I know your suspicions, and whence they spring. Indeed, it was the gentleman's natural conclusion. I was pressed to carry my mission. Sure I have been worse accompanied than by a tobyman. But as for my name, your lordship has given me no answer. Call me Ryder. I am for the Prince."
He heard me out, and 'twas the little touch of braggadocio I think that converted him, as much as anything. "What do you propose?" he asked, in another tone.
"I would ride back to-night," I said, "unless your lordship decide that I must lodge in jail."
"As to that," he exclaimed, "Mr Ryder, I fear that we must lodge you there in the meantime. What hour would you start?"
"The sooner the better," said I. "But nine will serve."
He regarded me with an urgent face of inquiry. "This may be a trap," he said suspiciously.
"Your lordship may guard against that," said I, suavely. "As large an escort of horse as you will, and none to know our destination save us two."
"Nay, none save yourself, Mr Ryder, it appears," he said grimly. "But you say well. I will be with you at nine."
Thereupon he motioned me away with a gesture of impatience and calling on the sheriff, pointed at me. The next moment I was surrounded and in their arms; but I played my part like a play-actor, crying upon his lordship to hear me, and making a piteous struggle with the officers.
A little later, and you might see me settled in the compter, hugging myself the one minute, and the next perplexed upon a further step; for, by what I saw of Jeffreys, I reckoned upon my punctual deliverance. The fact is that he was afeared of what would issue from this promised trouble of the Dutchman, and 'twas reported that such was the state of most of those about the Court, who were in the mind to play two parts, and neither with any stomach. Yet as the timedrew on and I had ample leisure to digest the various aspects of the adventure, I confess I was assailed by a fear lest Jeffreys should have been disporting himself with me, or should have cocked the white feather, and that I was still to rest and rot in that pestiferous dungeon. So that when at last the door swung wide and one of the turnkeys appeared, I was like to have cried out in my glee. 'Twas the signal, sure enough, for I was taken forthright out of my cell, and commanded into the presence of the governor. I do not know by what trickery the affair was managed, but if there was ever any dark intrigue to the point, you might trust Bloody Jeffreys for that; all I know is that 'twas but a few minutes ere I was out of the gates of the compter, under the pale face of the moon, and with my heels in the flanks of Calypso, gently ambling in a silent company towards the Plymouth road.
His lordship had taken me at my word, and there were six or more in the band that surrounded me; but we rode in a deep quiet, and for a long while I offered no address to the horseman by me, whom I supposed to be the Chief Justice himself. But presently, and when our faces were well set upon the Plymouth highway, and there was less chance that the cavalcade would invite curiosity owing to the sparseness of the wayfarers, heturned to me and spoke up for himself. It was Jeffreys, sure enough, and he wore a mighty look of worry, as I could perceive at the first glance.
"You have not informed me, Mr Ryder," says he, "to what destination we are bound?"
Now this was pretty much to the point, for Bloody Jeffreys was not the man to waste useless words; but, Lord love you, I had as much notion of whither we were set for as he had himself. 'Twas for a chance I was playing, and now that I had my two legs across Calypso once more, it would go badly with the whole half-dozen of 'em if I did not show a clean pair of heels somewhere and sometime. But of course I had thought upon the question in my prison, and says I, "You will understand, your lordship, that it's not in my authority to commit anything to words. I am bound by the Prince's orders."
"That is very well," he retorted, in his arrogant way. "But it appears that I must commit myself, and no one else. 'Tis a one-sided bargain I am not used to make."
"My lord," said I, very earnestly, "I will not deny but there is reason in your argument—and, for myself, I would at once admit you to my plans. But I am the custodian of the Prince's secret. 'Tis none of my own I guard."
"Well, well," he cried with impatience, "I suppose that I am to arrive somewhere."
"And where that somewhere is your lordship shall learn," said I, "with the permission and from the lips of his gracious Majesty King William."
He started at the words, and eyed me askance for a space, a dubious expression of irresolution crossing his features. "You are a bold man, Mr Ryder," he exclaimed, with something of a sneer. "I may remind you that there surround you five stalwart men-at-arms that own allegiance to his Majesty James II."
"And you would have added, my lord," said I, "that James Stuart's trusted servant is conversing with me. I am sensible of the peril in which I stand. But I am no Facing-Both-Ways. I hold by my conscience, i' faith."
"Sir," he rapped out, harsh and sudden, "I have laid you by the heels within the precincts of the compter once, and there I will lay you again, if you brandish your impudence before me."
"In the which case, my lord," quoth I, coldly, "you will be nothing bettered, and King William would have a loyal servant to avenge."
He said nothing, angrily considering me.
"Come, come, my lord," I said, "we are in a kind of silly balance one against t'other, and, to put no veil upon the situation, we scarce dare trust each other. I walk in a great public peril, sure, with your hands upon me, but consider upon what risks you yourself also move. I am familiar to the Prince; my errand is known about his Court. Turn about your horse, fetch me in chains to justice, and how will you appear? 'Tis a summary way with a royal herald. I ask you with what eyes the King will view this act, and with what penalties he will reward it?"
Jeffreys said nothing for a time, and then, speaking slowly, "You have," he said, in a quieter voice, "a strong persuasion of the Prince's triumph."
"My lord," said I, "you yourself shall be the judge. What cries are these that issue from the town these many months? With what voices was the Duke of Monmouth welcomed but yesterday? Nay, the people of this very country-side, newly trodden and trampled by King James's dragoons, scarred and lacerated by your own ensanguined hands, my lord—with what a face do they regard James Stuart, and what a welcome think you they would give ye for yourself?"
His lordship whitened under the moonlight, and his face betrayed an emotion of terror.'Twas plain that he had entertained these same thoughts, and that my design had given him several unhappy hours. But he made me no answer, and rode on, digesting these considerations with what stomach he might.
Now all this time we were getting farther into the rude country parts of the shire, and more than once I had turned the party upon a by-way, so that by this we were come out by the devil knows where. Moreover, it was become very late, and a shrewd wind from the south came snapping about our faces. And thus it grew upon me that I must bring this topsy-turvy adventure to some close, with what wit I might; the more particularly as by his lordship's contrivance (I make no doubt) I rode in the midst of a circle, and was evidently to consider myself a fast prisoner in the meantime. Now I had bred in my mind a very tolerable design by which I might have given 'em the slip, but by this time I was too nearly watched for that, and the bare appearance of the little inn of Wolcombe, which I was contemplating, would have served to start suspicions, if not certainty, in Jeffreys's noddle. So thinks I to myself that 'tis ever a bold course that runs the least risk, as, indeed, I have always attributed my own security to my never shirking a hazard in the passage of fortune. Upon which suggestioncomes another—that the present would serve as well as another opportunity, and better too, seeing that his lordship's eyes were beginning to lower on me at this undue delay. Wherefore what do I at this juncture, and when jogging along the way in the full face of old Oliver, but rein the nag to one side, and reaching down, open a huge gate that stood a little aback from the road.
"What is this?" asked Jeffreys, in surprise.
"This is the place, my lord," said I, in a whisper. "If you will march with me a little in the fore of these men, I will instruct you further as we ride up."
There was a moment's pause on his part, but then I suppose he considered the probabilities, and he saw that the road was clearly an approach to some great house. At anyrate, he issued an order to his escort, and the party wheeled up after me through the gateway and up the avenue.
"I take it, sir," he said at once, "that the Prince lies here?"
"That is so, my lord," said I, though, to say sooth, I was all the time wondering what the devil might lie at the end of this long passage, and what should be my next turn in the game. But Jeffreys seemed quite satisfied, and he even displayed a ruffle of eagernessat this juncture; and so once more in deep silence we rode on, and came out soon upon a great terrace of gravel surrounded by an amphitheatre of trees, with the long house lying black and high upon one side. The whole troop came to a halt here, and his lordship turned to me as who should ask, "What must be done now?" It was manifest on the instant that my only course lay in some prompt act, seeing that there was no opportunity to show my heels; and so, beckoning him with a quiet motion, I jogged on towards the house, Calypso's heels making a devilish noise trampling on the stones. Somewhere within the house shone a faint light, though 'twas long past midnight, and it seemed, therefore, that someone was astir within. His lordship's eyes met mine anxiously, and he moistened his lips. He was greatly agitated, for certain, and the sight strung my nerves. Off I leaped, and rapped loudly upon the knocker before the big door. Now I swear to you that when I laid my fingers to the knocker I had never a thought in my head as to the course I should pursue. But on that instant, and while the echoes rang still in my ears, I took a quick notion. Leaning forward to Jeffreys, I said, whispering,—
"My lord, I will prepare your way. Keep ye here, and you shall be fetched presently."
He stared at me suspiciously and in some bewilderment; but ere he could say anything the door swung gently back. With a spring I was across the threshold—and click goes the lock behind me in the very face of the astonished janitor. But he fell a-trembling.
"Who are you?" he said, while the light he carried shook in his hands.
"Hush!" says I, warningly; "make no noise. Your lives hang on it. There is a pack of dirty cut-throats on my heels," I says.
"Oh, Lord!" he groaned, and retired hurriedly from the door. I followed him, but he drew back, very suspicious.
"My good man," said I, judging him by his looks to be the butler, "pray use me with no suspicion. I am come to warn you. See, I bear no arms, but am a private and peaceful citizen like yourself."
"How come you here?" he asked, being somewhat reassured.
"I became privy to their designs by accident at the Wolcombe Inn, the scurvy rogues," said I, very pat and indignant, "and I have rode on to warn your master in the nick of time. Where may he be?"
"His lordship is abed, sir," he says.
"Oh, well," said I, "hale him forth."
"Nay, but I dare not," says he.
"Oh, very well," said I. "Then you shall have your throats cut, every man."
His jaw fell; then, "I have a blunderbuss," says he, brightening of a sudden.
"Blunderbuss!" says I, with a sneer. "Why, 'tis a veritable band of roaring satans, that lives on blunderbusses."
"Oh, Lord deliver us!" he cried, and wrung his hands. "What shall we do?"
Now, in point of fact, as you may see, 'twas in my power without more ado to play on my poor butler's fears, and so, skipping out of a back door, to leave Jeffreys and his crew to cool their heels on the terrace. But I was by this time infused with a certain zest of the adventure; I entertained it with a gusto; and so, drawing him gravely to a window near by that looked upon the front.
"See you," said I, pointing out the escort where they lay in waiting, "there's a monstrous set of rascals for ye, all a-hungering for blood, they are, all a-spitting on their hands to flirt their hangers, with which to slit the throats of poor civil citizens like me and you."
"Lord save us!" he said, with his teeth going. And just at that moment a thin voice sounded from somewhere above, and a tall lean old gentleman, wrapped in a night-rail and looking choleric of face, peered over the stairway at us.
"What the devil are you at, Jenkins?" he says peevishly.
"Oh, my lord," cried Jenkins (if that was the fool's name), "'tis a gentleman that has come to warn us—and there is a pack of highwaymen without, and our throats shall all be cut! Heaven help us!"
"Silence, sirrah! I will have none of this noise," cries the old gentleman, in a peppery voice. "You have disturbed my rest!" he says angrily.
"But, my lord," cried poor Jenkins, "the highwaymen—"
"Well, well," says he, shrilly, "send 'em away. You must get rid of 'em," and he looked testily at the butler.
But by this time with the noise of our talking the whole house was awake, and there came the sound of doors opening, and forth from dark passages broke lights, and faces peeped over balustrades.
"My lord," said I, for 'twas time for me to think of old Jeffreys outside, "'tis true there's highwaymen without, but I can think of a way to trap 'em."
"'Tis well someone has his wits," says he, pettishly. "Well, what would you do?"
"I would let the captain in," said I, "when he knocks on the door, and shutting him off from his fellows, fall upon him and take him."
"What then?" said he.
"Why," says I, "you may then make your terms with the gang, having him for a hostage."
"Why did you not think of that, Jenkins?" said the old gentleman, querulously. "Jenkins, you shall capture the captain as this gentleman advises."
But Jenkins's face fell, and he fidgeted with his fingers: 'twas plain the mission was not to his taste. There was no time to spend upon such tremors, for indeed I knew that Jeffreys would be getting suspicious in his mind, and I was now resolute to put a score upon him for his ugly behaviour. So said I: "There is no need, my lord, to entrust the matter to Jenkins here, seeing that all may bear a hand. I make no doubt that there be weapons of a kind, and if Mr Jenkins, maybe, will jump on the villain's back when he is down—"
"Faith, that will I," said Jenkins, stoutly, and armed himself forthwith with a warming-pan that hung upon the walls.
And that act setting the note, the company broke away in a commotion, each securing some form of a missile wherewith to assail the miscreant. And with that, as if the affair was already at an end, the old gentleman pulls his wrapper close around him and returns very coolly to his bed. But I had no time forthese observations, for now was come the occasion upon which my scheme depended, and,—
"There he knocks," said I, suddenly.
But they were all so cluttered with their fears and their excitement that not one of them but believed I spoke the truth.
"Lord, how savage he knocks!" says a wench, with a shiver, and lays hold of a lackey's arm.
I went down to the door, and upon the first lifting of the latch they popped away like rabbits in a warren. There, sure enough, was his lordship, in a mighty trepidation and with an ugly scowl.
"Come in," says I, in a whisper; "the Prince was abed, but will see you at once, my lord."
He came over the threshold, and—clap—I shut the door behind him; and when that was done I breathed more freely, for I knew that I was secure in my game. The Chief Justice, looking very fine and stately, advanced down the solitary hall, emerging under the dim light; and then, all of a sudden a hassock came rustling through the air and took him in the belly. Over he went with a little gasp, and measured his length upon the floor. Upon that leaps out my friend Jenkins with his warming-pan, and bestriding hislordship's back, sets to belabouring for dear life. Immediately after, and encouraged by this, others of the lackeys sprang forth and fell to maltreating the poor cully where he lay.
"Take that, you lousy knave, you?" says one fat wench, and turns over him a kitchen utensil of some kind.
"Let me scratch his eyes!" cries another; and Lord love you, what with their exclamations and the screaming, to say nothing of the noise of Jenkins's warming-pan and his lordship's angry oaths, you would have thought that Bedlam was broke loose.
But in the midst of it all I caught suddenly a sound of horses' hoofs upon the gravel, and on the top of that came a hammering at the door. I am no fool to outstay my welcome and so thinks I that the time is come, and seizing a light that stood near by I made straight through the midst of that uproar and plunged into the nether darkness of the house. Here, by picking my way through divers passages, I presently came forth by a side door and passed out into the night. A shrill whistle in the old way fetched Calypso to me whinnying, and as I put my hand upon her bridle I turned back and listened. There was that pandemonium still within the hall, reaching me faintly through the open doorway, and the escort was still hammering onthe hall door. Then I leaped into the saddle and turned the mare's nose down a side track in the park, and the last I heard as I rode off, chuckling to myself, was the noise of the escort pounding on the door.
I havehad ever an eye for a doxy, and in the course of my life have happened upon a variety of the sex such as falls to few men. Some have been fine ladies, brave with their lace and powder, and others again have descended upon a scale to the common Kixsywinsy; but in the end I would wager Polly Scarlet against any of the pack. Yet I will confess that there were some that have mightily tickled me, and one or two that went near to turn my head for their looks alone, to speak nothing of their state and grace. Not but what I have long learned the measure of beauty, and how far it may go—a man is a fool to surrender to that on the summons; yet I will not deny how greatly it disturbs the midriff, and, coming home so sharp, does thus affect the bearing of us all. Madam or miss, there was no handsomer lady in town on that summer night when I encountered her than Sir Philip Caswell's ward, and 'twas that, I'll be bound, influenced me in my behaviour subsequently. Nevertheless, I vow I did not care two straws for the pretty puss in my heart.
'Twas after a long evening at a gaming house in Marylebone that I was returning on my two legs through the fields for Soho. I was in a pleasant temper, having filled my pockets with king's pictures, and I had drunk nothing save a bottle or so of good burgundy since dinner. The hour, indeed, was past midnight, and I was casting up the chances to find supper at the Pack Horse, or the Golden Eagle, or some other house known to me. "Well," says I, as I came out in the hedgerows, "'tis nearly one, and rip me if I do not sup and lie abed by two, and live virtuous," for I was pleased with what I was carrying, and loth to lose it. A bird was calling in a flutter from the hedge, and just upon that another sound came to my ears, and on the still air arose the clamour of swords in engagement. This was nothing to me, for I am not used to intermeddle in such affairs as nocturnal brawls, unless, indeed, I am gone in liquor, as sometimes happens, or am led off by troublesome company. But to the sounds of the fight succeeded the voice of a woman, crying, but not very loudly, for help. This, as you may believe, was upon another footing, for there was never a petticoat that appealed to Dick Ryder in her trouble in vain, as my records will prove on any road in England. So off I set at a run in the directionof the sounds, which seemed to stream out of the entrance to Windmill Street. The houses here were black and silent (it being so late) and there was no sign of any interest on the part of the inhabitants of the quarter. But the moon, which had been under a scurry of clouds, struck out of her shelter and showed me plain the scene of the struggle. There, in the roadway, stood the body of a chaise, with two trampling horses, while about it was a melley of figures, two of which were engaged, hammer and tongs, upon each other. I was not long ere I had seized the situation, and interpreted it properly; and, whipping out my blade, I made no ado about falling on the assailants of the chaise. 'Twas easy to make out who these were, inasmuch as one of the men wore a mask across his eyes. I ran upon him and those behind him, while I was aware of the woman's cry that still issued out of the chaise but now suddenly stopped.
At that I lunged, but on that same instant the scum about him came at me from the side, so that I was forced to keep my eyes and weapon in two places. The man in the mask had not ceased to ply his point on the gentleman whom I took to be the owner of the chaise, and this seemed a sturdy, obstinate fellow enough, for he puffed and grunted hard at my ear, but fought like any dragon. Oneof those that came at me I winged in the arm, and, swiftly dodging behind my ally, I came upon the masked man and ran him through the shoulder without advertisement. He dropped his arm with an oath, and, as he did so, the mask fell from his face, which showed clear and lean in the moonlight. But that was no sooner done than the big man by me lurched and staggered, so that it was plain he had taken something in his vitals. Well, here was I now all alone with that evil pack about me, pressing on me like birds of prey, for although I had pinked one and his master, there was two more able-bodied culleys left, to say nothing of the master himself, whose wound, to judge from his language, was more painful than serious. I am quick at a resolve, and know when to withdraw from in front of odds. There was a man fallen wounded, and maybe dead, and no signs of the watch; while from the chaise peered, as I caught a glimpse, a white and terrified face in the moonlight. The coachman, it was clear, had taken to his heels already, and the horses stood champing and trembling and swaying in their alarm at the noises. What does I, then, as there was a little lull in the fray and the others temporarily drew off, but stoop and lift the big man from the ground and bundle him rapidly into the chaise. Banggoes the door and, leaping to the coachman's seat, I lashed the horses with the flat of my blade. They started in a panic, and the chaise went plunging and rocking down the narrow way.
This fetched me into King Street, and, in fear of pursuit, I stood up and banged at the nags, so that I had them bumping at a gallop round into the Oxford Road and on the way for Tyburn. When we had run some distance I brought 'em to with an effort, and, hearing no noise of the enemy, descended and opened the door of the chaise. The moon shone sufficiently for me to make out the humped body of the man I had thrust in so roughly, and opposite, white, shrinking, and in an evident state of terror and agitation, a mighty handsome and engaging miss that stared at me helplessly.
"Is—is he dead?" she asked hoarsely.
"Faith, miss," says I, "I cannot say. Yet I hope not. He's not for worms, I'll warrant. Best get him home and have a surgeon fetched; and if you will acquaint me with the house, I will make so bold as to take you myself."
She waited a moment and then spoke, giving a street in St James's, at which I made her a congee and got upon the box again. I am better astride a nag than with a whip inmy hand, and moreover the night was now pretty dark, yet 'twas not long ere we had reached the house, and, the bell being rung and the servants called, the fat gentleman was got in safely enough. Upon that someone flies for the surgeon, and there was I all alone with the lady, and not loth to clap my peepers on her more nearly. She moved with a style, but had a fearful air, yet it was her face that took me most. She was young and slender and nothing too tall—large-eyed and round of limb, and with a mouth that budded in repose and opened like a flower in speech. But she was very still and white just then.
"I am Sir Philip Caswell's ward, sir," she says, very tremulously, "and we are much beholden to you."
"I am honoured, madam," said I with a congee again, "to have been of some small service to you."
"The scoundrels fell upon us by Windmill Street upon our way home," she continued, with a pretty shudder. "Sir Philip stepped out to face them. I begged he would not, but he is very obstinate."
"Faith, miss, what could he do less?" said I.
"We might have whipped up and so escaped them," says she, with an air of some petulance now, "but that our cowardly man took to his heels and left us helpless."
As she spoke she eyed me with more coldness, I thought, than the occasion warranted, for all she was so shook, and though she had made me her compliments quite prettily, she had spoke as if she were thinking of something else; which, as you will conceive, nettled me not a little. It was as if she wished me away, for she fell silent and cast glances at the chamber clock that hung at the wall. But seeing I had been at the pains for her and the old fat man, why, says I to myself, rip me if I will go like any discharged lackey. I will tire her out, says I, and let Beauty yawn or pay in gratitude. So I sat on in the saloon, making conversation as it seemed fit to me to serve one of her class and age. No doubt she was tired, for the hour was about two in the morning, yet her pretty yawns, which she feigned to cover with her hands, vexed me. But indeed I might have gone forth and left her there and then for very shame as would have been natural, had it not been that an excuse came to aid me in a message from Sir Philip, who had recovered under the attentions of the surgeon. He had learned, it seemed, that his rescuer was in the house and begged that he might be allowed to thank him in person presently. This set me in feather, but miss in the sulks, as I thought, which maddened me the more that the hussy shouldprove so ungrateful, particularly at a time when she should be showing concern at her adventure or, at least, grief for her guardian. Yet as I watched her, perish me but she charmed me with her petulant prettiness the more. Such a dainty head and a mouth so pert and alluring I had never yet clapped eyes on, which I say for all that followed.
There, then, were we set, awaiting Sir Philip, in the big chamber, she yawning without disguise, and me racking my wits to attract her. I'll warrant she must have taken an idea of me as a buck of Town, although she feigned coldness then. I spoke of the play and the Court, of both of which I knew secrets, and I talked on a level proper to the sex.
"D'ye not love the play, miss?" says I.
"Lard, it is pretty well," says she, and covered up a yawn with ostentation.
"I doubt not but you have seenLove in a Tub?" said I, for I would not be beat by her impudence.
"Maybe," says she, "I have a poor memory."
"There was one played in it t'other day like to you, miss," said I, with significance, thinking to rouse her.
She lifted her eyebrows. "Well, indeed," says she, indifferently.
"As handsome as I might wish to see—so she was," said I, persisting.
"Why! do you say so?" cries miss. "What a fortunate lady!" and stifles another yawn.
"You favour her, miss," says I, giving her an eye.
"Lard, I favour none, sir," said she, tartly. "I am cross like two sticks that could beat myself," and ere I could find a word in retort she had gone from the room.
If I had followed my first temper I should have marched from the house forthright, being sore to be so used by the minx; but I will admit she had a fascination for me, and wherein my teeth are set there I hold; so that I paced the chamber once or twice and "Faith," says I, angrily, "I will make the little cockatrice sing another tune afore I've done."
And no sooner was I come to this conclusion than the door at the foot of the room opened, and in walks an elegant gentleman. The sound made me turn, and I watched him till he came into the light of the candles, when I cried out sharply—for the face was no other than that which had lain behind the mask in that nocturnal attack. I took some steps across the room and halted by him, so that he might see me as clearly as I saw him.
"Well, sir," says I, "I'll make bold to say you recognise me," for I was amazed and disordered by his remarkable appearance in that house.
He looked me up and down. "Not the least in the world," says he, coolly, and arranged some nice point in his sleeves. "Who the devil may you be?"
"Rip me," says I, angrily. "The question is not that so much as who be you and what audacity brings you here? But if you want it you shall have it. My name is Ryder."
He paused again before he replied to me, and there was no manner of irritation in his voice, but merely languor.
"Well, Mr Ryder, one good turn deserves another; so my name is York, and I am a friend of Sir Philip Caswell."
"What!" said I, mightily taken aback at this rejoinder, as you may suppose, then I laughed. "S'blood," I said, "'tis a pretty demonstration of friendship to be for striking your bodkin in someone's belly, as you was an hour ago, you rogue."
York's eyebrows lifted at this, but I will admit he had a fine command of himself, which took my admiration, toad as he was. He was a healthy, ruddy man, of looks not displeasing.
"Indeed," says he to me, "why, here is news. Have we Simon Bedlam here,madam?" and he turned to miss, who had entered at that moment. He bowed very low to her, and the colour sprang in her face.
"Mr York," she cried, in a fluttered way.
"Why, you did not look for me so late, madam," says he, pleasantly. "But I spied lights, and thought maybe Sir Philip was at his cards and would give me welcome, and the door was open. But I find only," he concluded, with an indifferent glance on me, "a Merry Andrew who talks brimstone and looks daggers."
"Sir Philip has been attacked," stammered miss; "the surgeon has just left him."
"'Tis not serious, I trust," says the fellow, gravely, and when she had faltered out her negative, continued very polite, "Footpads, I doubt not. The streets are abominable in these days, and the watch is ever asleep."
But that was too much for me, and I burst forth.
"Footpads!" said I. "Hear him, miss? Why, 'twas the dung-fork himself. The mask fell from his face as he fought me, and I saw him plain. I would have you and Sir Philip know what manner of man this is who calls himself friend."
"Softly, softly; you crow loud," said he, as impudent as ever, and smiling softly. "Who, d'ye suppose, would credit thiscock-and-bull story? I profess I know none. Would you, madam?" he asked, turning suddenly on the girl.
She hesitated ever so little, and showed some confusion.
"I—I think the gentleman mistook," said she. "I cannot credit such a story. 'Tis monstrous."
"Why, miss," said I, "'tis true as I am a living man. And as for this muckrake here, why, I will prove it on his skin if he denies it," and out I whipped my iron, ready for an onfall. But it seemed that he would not budge, and smiled as indifferent as ever. And miss, too, though she showed no colour, regained her composure, and says she, firmly,—
"'Tis monstrous. I cannot believe it. This gentleman is a friend to me and Sir Philip. He is on terms of intimacy. Lard, sir, you surprise me to make such rash statements. Your eyes deceived you, or the dark."
The man that called himself York nodded impudently. "That is it, madam," he says. "'Twas his eyes, no doubt, and the blinking moon. This gentleman, whom I have not the honour of knowing, is doubtless much excited by the event and must be excused. Otherwise...." he shrugged his shoulders significantly, "I am honoured by the resemblancehe detects, and, my faith, I shall be seeing my double kick the Triple Beam—so I shall, and curse him for a rogue."
But you may guess that this was too much for me—to stand there quiet and see the cully talk so suave and false, and the girl so credulous, and perilling herself and the house by blind faith in such a villain. Upon his features, moreover, there was a faint grin that spread and counterfeited civility, almost as it were, a leer, and that maddened me; so that I spoke out pretty hotly.
"'Tis very true what you say, sir," said I, "and there was no witness of what happened save me and old Oliver, the moon. And so the law shall go free of you. Indeed, I have no particular fancy for the law myself. But, perish me, sir," says I, "I detect a mighty resemblance in you to a wheedler that cheated me at dice this night, and, rip me, if I will not run you through the midriff for it."
There was my point towards him, with that little menacing twist of my wrist, such as has served me often in good stead, and he must have seen what sort of kidney he had to deal with, for he gazed at me in surprise, laughed slightly, and made protest with his shoulders, exhibiting some discomposure.
"I would remind you, sir," said he, "that there is a lady here."
"Faith," says I, "but she will not be outside, then, and thither you shall go."
York frowned at this and stood for a moment as though he was at a loss for answer. I was not to be put down by a naughty fop like him, with his punctilios, more especially as I was acting in the interests of the lady, so I pressed him with the naked blade.
"Come," says I, "let's see your tricks out of doors."
But at that a voice broke in and stayed me, coming from the door behind.
"Pray, sir," says this, very level and quiet, "what may this scene mean?"
Round I whipped, and there, on the threshold of the room, was the tall big man that had fought by me, Sir Philip himself, with his arm in a bandage, a cap on his iron-grey hair, and on his face a stern, commanding expression. Out of the tail of my eye I saw miss shrank back against the wall in a posture of alarm. But York was no whit abashed; he saluted most ceremoniously.
"Good evening, Sir Philip," said he. "Your servant. You are come in time—perish me, in the very nick. Here's a most impudent and amazing case," and he cocks his finger at me. "I have never heard of a more shameless, audacious fellow. Faith, it has made me laugh—so impudent is it!"
"I should like to know what it is, Mr York, so that I maybe might share the jest," says Sir Philip, with some dryness of tone.
"Why, naturally," returned t'other cheerfully. "Having had the good fortune to rescue you and your ward from a pack of villains, cutpurses or worse, what is my surprise to find installed in your house the very chief of the villains, as impudent as you please. Faith, if it were not so grave 'twould tickle me still."
I must admit that the fellow took me back, and for all I was furious I could not but admire his cool bearing and ready wit. Sir Philip stared at me with a black frown, for I could find nothing for the moment to counter this monstrous brazen charge, but at last I broke out, only with an oath, for sure—so amiss was I.
"You damnable rogue!" said I.
But York goes on as calm as ever. "'Twould be a good thing, sir," says he, looking at me with a kind of wondering interest, "if perhaps the watch was called. For he is a man that can use a weapon, as your arm bears witness, and, indeed, my own skin, too," with which he stroked his elbow gently. Sir Philip had come forward and now began in a formidable voice of anger.
"What!" he cries to me, "you are the ruffian—"
But I was not going to put up meekly under this, and broke out myself.
"Rip me," said I, "if I have ever heard or seen the like. Why, yonder stands the fellow that was in the assault on your carriage, and 'twas me, Dick Ryder, that thrust him through the elbow as he fell on you."
Sir Philip's eyes went from one to t'other of us, under his bent black brows, but York's eyebrows were lifted in a feint of amazement.
"Why, Sir Philip," said he, "you will see from this how an excess of impudence may move a man. It may be that he is drunk that he plays so wildly. You have known me long. Sure, I needn't speak in my own behalf to so preposterous a charge," and dropped silent with a grand air.
"I have known you long, as you say, sir," said Sir Philip, slowly, "and I have known you to be a suitor for my ward's hand."
"I have always had that honour," said York, with a bow towards miss, "which, unhappily, you have not seen fit to allow me so far. Yet, if any witness is wanted, why, here is your ward herself."
At that Sir Philip turned as though reminded.
"Lydia," said he, "what is the truth of this story? We were attacked and rescued.Was this gentleman in the assault?" and he pointed at me.
Miss's eyes fell; she was fluttered and her bosom went fast; and there flashed, I'll swear, a glance from York.
"Indeed, sir," she faltered, "I could not say. The men were masked."
"Ay, so they were," said he, considering.
"'Twas from this one's face that I took the cover," put in York, pertly.
"But certain it is that Mr York rescued us," went on miss in a faint voice.
At that news I could have reeled under the words, so little was I ripe for them, and so unsuspicious of her.
"Why," said I, opening my mouth and stuttering, "why, 'twas I drove off the pack, and fetched the chaise home. 'Twas I lifted you in and took the reins. The Lord deliver me from this wicked puss!"
Sir Philip threw up his sword arm with a gesture of black wrath.
"'Tis plain," said he, "that one here is a villainous rogue, and if we have not always agreed, Mr York, at least I cannot think you that."
Miss leaned against the wall white and trembling, and I gave her a congee, very deep and ironical. Truth to say, as soon as I had recovered I had, after my habit, begun to plymy wits pretty sharply, and already I had taken a notion of how things stood between the two. Moreover, I was not done with yet, and I cast about to be even with the pair. Sir Philip, it seemed, was hostile to the addresses of this York; and as patently, miss herself was not. The attack, then, must have been part of a plan to gain Miss Lydia's person, to which she was herself privy. What do I then but step in and interfere with the pretty plot? This was why she bore me no goodwill, no doubt.
"Well," says I, with the congee, "I cannot contest a lady's word, be she Poll or Moll. Let the gentleman have his way."
Sir Philip, without more ado, turned to him.
"Mr York," said he, civilly, "I beg your pardon for my coldness, which, indeed, had nothing of suspicion. But you must remember that we have never quite agreed. I hope that will mend. I remain greatly in your debt, and I trust you will be good enough to add to my obligations by keeping this man secure until my return. I will have the watch fetched at once."
"Nothing will give me greater satisfaction, sir," says the rogue, cheerfully, and off goes Sir Philip with his black, portentous face, leaving us three there together again. Asfor me, I had made up my mind and was feeling my way to some action; but says York, looking on me pleasantly,—
"Egad, you're in a ticklish case. Stap me, you've run your head into a noose. Now, why the devil did you yield that way? I had looked for a good round fight, as good, egad, as we had this evening. And I had begun to have my fears, too—stap me, I did."
But I paid him no heed then, for I will confess that I was all eyes for Miss Lydia, whose face was very piteous. She was trembling violently and looked out of tragic eyes, and then it came upon me like a flash that she was no party to the lie herself, but had spoken in fear of that bully. Indeed, it may be that she took a distaste of him, as it were, from that scene which began to show from that minute. How else can be explained what ensued?
"You had better go, sir," said she at last, in a whisper.
"Ay, that's true," says York, nodding. "I had not thought of that. You had better go. The watch will be fetched."
He looked so comfortable and so friendly, rather than what he was at heart, that my gorge rose of a sudden.
"Perish me if I will go," says I. "If I must hang I must hang."
Miss started. "Oh!" she cried, and "you must go, oh, you must go, sir! Fly, fly, while there is time."
Here were the two culprits in unison for my withdrawal, which would fetch them out of a scrape, yet how far the girl was involved in the business I had not yet determined. So I pushed her further, as, indeed, I had the right. I folded my arms.
"I am waiting my reward, madam," I said, "something in recognition of my efforts on behalf of yourself and Sir Philip."
But at this she fell into a greater exhibition of distress, imploring me to go, and flitting in agitation 'twixt me and the door, on which she kept anxious watch. Well, thought I, if here's not innocence at least she's in a pickle enough, and I believe I would have gone had it not been for York, whose bearing annoyed me. Besides, I wanted to see how far miss would go, and if her resolution to veil the truth would stand out against the watch and a poor victim haled to prison. Not that I wanted the watch or the law about me nearer than was necessary, for sundry reasons, but I can always trust to my own ingenuity and sword if it comes to the pinch. So I listened to her deafly, and made no sign to go.
"Let him be, Lydia," says York, pleasantly."He's an obstinate fellow, and, faith, deserves his fate. Let him hang; I'll warrant it must have come to that some day."
But this turns me on him, and I whipped out my blade again in a fury at his insolence; only Miss Lydia intervened, and, her face very pale, put a hand on my arm.
"Oh, sir," says she, very low of voice, but clear and earnest for all that, "I beg you will not suffer further harm to come to-night. Indeed, but I am ashamed to look you in the face. I will not excuse myself—I will offer no apologies, yet, maybe, you will not think too hardly of me if you know more. My guardian keeps me close. He stands in my way, and will not allow me what is allowed all women. I am not a schoolgirl, sir. I am grown a height," and she raised herself to her full stature. "Surely I may have that liberty to command, to choose where I will and whom. Sir, he has sought to make himself all the law to me," she cries, with heaving bosom. "And as for his hurt, God knows I did not wish it, and was not privy to it," and she cast a glance, as I thought, of scorn and reproach at her lover. The eloquence of this new attitude struck me to the reins, tender as I ever was to the wounds of women, though not to be frustrated or deceived by vain pretences.
"He is a hog," says I, "a pig of a man to interfere with you, madam."
But here spoke York, when he had better have held his tongue, yet it was impossible.
"Faith, child," he said lightly, "you have touched him there. Best stop and go no farther. Let it work."
"I will go on," she cried, stamping her foot and turning on him. "I will tell all to this gentleman, all that should be told; for it is his due and meed—a small recompense for the unworthy usage he has had. You have heard him, sir," she says, "and, indeed, your eyes have been witness to his deeds and what he is. My guardian came between us and denied us. And this washisplan—to snatch me away by violence while I stood passive, not refusing nor accepting." She wrung her hands in a transport of distress. "I—I was wild ... I did madly; yet, sir, I would not have you judge me by that. See, it has all ended in trouble, nothing but trouble, and I have gained nothing for myself but shame."
She paused upon the edge of tears, as I could see pretty plain, and says I, bluntly, "You were misled, and by them that should not," and I scowled at York where he stood. But York says nothing, merely lifting his shoulders, and being content, no doubt, to let miss deal with the situation. She sankher face in her hands, which moved me strangely, for she had a helpless look.
"If I have misjudged, sir, and been mistook," she said, "can you blame me if I would bury that shame and not have it flaunted in my face?"
"Not I, madam," said I. "I would I might help you, troth I do."
"You can," she cried, sparkling shyly and eagerly upon me.
"Why ...," says I.
"If you will go, sir, there will be no trouble, no inquiry, and no law will be set in motion. 'Twill die a quiet death, and nothing will be digged up against me. I shall not have to tell the truth, as I shall have else," she cried. Her lips parted in her fever, her eyes burning with a wild zeal.
York uttered a sound, but I was silent.
"Oh, sir!" she pleaded.
"Why," I said, with a laugh. "It seems I must condone wounds and abduction and all."
"'Tis on me the brunt will fall—the shame and scandal," she urged, and, looking in her pretty face, I could resist no longer, for I'll swear she was genuine, and had been misled by that muckrake.
"I will go," says I, and then of a sudden remembered. "But how am I to escape?" says I.
"By the window," she said, pointing to it with animation.
"Why, to be sure," says I, slowly, for I was taken with a notion, "but there is this gentleman who is my guard."
"Oh!" says she, archly, "I think your sword is better than his, and he will not stay you."
"True," says I, "but 'tis best to be prudent and to avoid Sir Philip's suspicions. He must have some marks of a struggle. Either I must leave him with a wound, or senseless, or gagged and bound ... or maybe suspicion will come to rest on you, madam."
Her brows were bent in a little frown. "That is true," she said, and turned to York, whose face for the first time, as I could see, wore a look of discomposure.
"He must be bound and gagged," says I, shaking my head.
"Ye-es," she says, hesitatingly.
Whereupon I went forward to the fellow, who gnawed his lip and fidgeted. He looked at Miss Lydia as if about to speak, and then shot an angry glance at me, but paused.
"Oh, very well," says he, at last, with a grin, "but pray make haste or you will be surprised in the middle of your job—" and he had the air of yielding himself with good humour. But I knew what must be hischagrin, though I admired him for his manner. He would have done pretty well on the road if he could have put by his scurvy way with women. Yet I was not for letting him off, after what he had done, so, withdrawing the cords from the window curtains, I tied him pretty quickly in a fast enough bundle. But when, his arms being lashed behind, I approached with a wedge of wood, York cried out in protest.
"I'll have none of that," said he.
"He must be gagged," says I to the lady, appealing to her. She hesitated, and, looking on him, appeared to take pity; or maybe she was afraid of him.
"Perhaps it is not necessary," she said.
"Why, look you, madam," said I, earnestly, "we must convince Sir Philip of our good faith; else he will smell out this trickery and all our pains are thrown away."
She made no answer and with the wedge I moved a step nearer to York, who grimaced and cried out with an oath,—
"May I be—"
But ere he could get it forth I had it between his teeth, and with my knee in his wind threw him in a heap upon the floor. Miss Lydia looked on with open eyes, and with an air of uncertainty.
What she would have said I know not, butat that moment there was a sound without the door, and she broke out.
"Go—go," she cried, running to me. "You can go now in safety."
"Yes, 'tis time I was gone if I am to keep the bargain," said I, looking with a grin on York, who was wriggling on the floor.
I gave miss a congee, and backed to the window. "If you will credit me, madam," says I, "you will think twice ere you take up with York there."
"I know, I know," says she, eagerly, for she was terrified of the sounds outside. "I will be wise, I promise you."
Her skirts swung against me, and that touch on my arm sent through me an amazing thrill, so that, beholding her so vastly handsome and passionate at my elbow, my blood fired at the sight.
"Madam," said I, very grave, "I had thought to do you some good, and that privilege would have been my reward. But I find myself only to have plunged you in embarrassments, for which may I be whipped. What get I for my pains, then? Why, nothing, not even the private consolation to have relieved you; and in this escape what touches me is not so much the ignominy as the deprivation of these eyes of one they would have dwelled on always."
'Twas not ill phrased, as you will admit, and I got it off with unction, her face being so close to me, and devilish enticing. The sounds were not now audible, and I was at the window, so that I suppose she had forgot her tremors. A demure look crept in her face under my boldness, and says she softly,—
"What would you have me do?"
"Oh, madam," said I, burning on her. "Look up, look up, I pray you, and I'll warrant you'll read me as clear as a book."
"I cannot guess, sir," says she, looking up with her innocent eyes all the same, while from the floor there was a choking sound which, maybe, was the dust in York's nostrils. Miss looked round.
"We are keeping Mr York in an uncomfortable position," says she, sweetly. "'Tis not a pleasant posture to be in."
"Faith," said I, boldly, "I would lie so all night if I might get what I want now."
"What is it you want?" says she, opening her eyes in wonder.
"Why, what I will take, and suffer all risks," says I of a sudden. With which I put my arm about her swiftly and carried her face to mine. Miss Lydia called out "Oh!" and the gag was shaken with uncouth, unintelligible sounds. A noise streamed out of the hall.
"Go, go!" cries she, pink of face and sparkling, and seeing my time was come I turned and went, leaving the gag still spluttering in the corner.
I havedealt in my time with traps and catchpoles of many colours; I have treated with justices and officers of the law that were mighty difficult; and I have encountered innumerable rough bucks that have pressed me badly. But give me them all rather than a pack of silly, screaming women that know not their own mind for two minutes on end. Many times have I adventured the sex in one way or another, and I can claim to have been esteemed by them, from milkmaids to ladies, even to my Lady Barbara, Duchess of Cleveland. But I will confess that my heart beats too soft in me to confront them rightly. I cannot abide tears nor a swollen countenance, and a petticoat catches me; and there it is. Not that I am a fool where women are concerned, for on occasion there is no harder flint than Dick Ryder, as is known in the four quarters of the kingdom. But I lean to mercy and consideration, and particularly if I be in a good humour or in liquor.
'Twas in a frolic mood that I met the wenchof the Magpie, which meeting led to an evening's entertainment, tolerably humoursome, but something "pretty-missy" for a stark man like me. I was newly come from the Bath Road with my purse full of king's pictures, to the which I had added on Turnham Green without so much as a thought of it. 'Twas fallen dark of a foul December evening, and, as I was riding for town, I missed the road and Calypso floundered into a bog of water and mire. With a curse I pulled her out, when just at that moment I heard a voice crying out a little way off. The common oozed mud, for the rain had been falling heavily, but I pushed the mare across in the direction of the voice, and there was another that had fallen into my plight, but much worse. For a chaise had wandered off the road and was axle-deep in a pond that spreads on the common.
"Help!" says the voice.
"That I will! Help you and myself, too," says I; and I gave a hand to the coachman and together we got the carriage to land.
"I am much in your debt, sir," says the master of it when we were done—a smug-speaking sort of fellow whose face I could not see. "You have placed Samuel Hogg, haberdasher, of Bristol, under obligations," he said pompously.
"Oh, you are in my debt, 'tis no doubt," says I, laughing, "but, rip me, you won't be long;" and at that I delivered him of a pile of gold guineas, and turned my back on his entreaties and objurgations.
When I was come to town I put up at my favourite inn and where I am known, and on the next day I set out for Polly Scarlet's. But when I got there, there was my poor girl abed with a swollen cheek. So, says I, giving her good cheer and a certain trinket that I had for her, I will make the best of my way to Soho and see if, maybe, some of the lads be assembled. But I had got no further than the Minories, when who should emerge into sight in the company of two officers, but Timothy Grubbe, that rascally thief-taker, crimp and scoundrel. I am not to be frightened by any man on earth, but 'twas wise to go shy of Timothy and his friends at that time; so ere they had a sight of me I turned my back on them and slipped in at the Magpie tavern. Here was a warm room and comfortable, and the wine, when mulled, was passable, though sour. So I tossed off a draught and says to the wench, ironically,—
"To bring out the flavour of this tap, I'll eat cheese, my dear. 'Tis a wine worth testing," says I.
Thereat she fetched me cheese, and stoodstaring on a ring that she wore on her finger, a little in the shadow. Well, I sat idly there, sipping at my glass, for 'twas pleasant enough, and quiet. 'Twas a bare, empty tap, as it chanced, and the wench and I had it to ourselves. She was a pretty sort of figure, all in white—white mob and white apron; of a middle height and slightness pleasant in so young a maid, brisk of eye, quick of face, and with a certain abruptness of chin. She stood, as I say, staring on a ring, in a brooding seriousness, and then of a sudden she uttered a little sob and rushed her apron to her eye.
"Whoa!" says I. "Whoa there, mare," speaking softly enough, but she started up and turned about, so that her face was no longer in the light, and so remained a little while.
"Come, my pretty," said I in a good-humoured way. "Wash no colour from that blue. I'll warrant 'tis admired, and rightly. If there's any huff or bully that breeds those dew-drops give me his name, and on my word, I'll make carrion of him."
At that she turned to me again, holding herself erect, and her eyes discharged at me a glance. 'Twas not one of haughtiness merely, but rather one in which fear and defiance and anger rubbed shoulders. One might have said, indeed, that all these sentiments rained together from her pretty peepers. But thenshe dropped her head as quickly, and affected her interest in the bottles or the casks or something else in the distance.
"Why," says I, "I will even taste once more that delectable bin," and she came forth, reluctant, to fill my glass again. "Now," says I, when I had her there, "you're a girl of spirit; rip me, what's amiss?"
"Sir?" she says with a glare in her face.
"Come, if every pretty filly used her hind legs so hard," said I with a laugh, "what room would be left in the stalls?"
She said no word but went about her business, the which, as I am not used to rebuffs either from man, madam, or maid, nettled me; but I know such wildings; they be not pigeons nor doves nor tame sparrows neither. I must lime her with another manner; so I altered my voice, and says I, in a pleasant, but masterful, tone,—
"You must not think me any Peeping Tom," I said, "to twist his eyes on you and badger you. Tears spoil that handsome cheek, and I would know if there be no remedy. I cannot abide to see youth and beauty weeping."
She had turned her head now, and gave me a searching glance. "'Tis naught you could help in, sir," she says with some demureness,and then broke out, "'tis along of my aunt. She has put upon me and treated me ill."
"A hag of an aunt," says I sympathetically, "to bruise one so tender and so dutiful, I'll swear."
"Yes, 'tis so," says she, now with some confidence, and wagging her little head towards me. "She knows not when she is well-served—that she doth not."
"I'll take oath of that," says I.
"I am daughter to her husband's sister, sir," said she, running on glibly by this time, "and Cousin Tom is sib to me."
"Why, for sure, if he be your cousin," said I.
"And when my mother died," she said, taking no heed, "uncle says I must live with him, and there have I lived all these years."
"None so many, rip me," says I, handsomely.
"He has had good service out of me," she said, casting me a glance, as of one who would assert her rights. "There have I worked for my Aunt Susan and cast up figures for uncle, and no thanks given me—no, not a crown's worth all these years."
"A sorry pair of skinflints," said I, nodding. "But I would not cry tears on them, not I, if I was a spirited wench."
"'Tis not that," says she, weeping anew."'Tis that I am turned out of doors; they will not have me more."
"Why, how is that?" I asked, whereat she looked demure as a saint, and says she,—
"Oh, 'twas but nothing. 'Twas Cousin Tom."
And it appeared that Cousin Tom had set calf's eyes on her, and that his mother destined him for better things; so that the wench must quit, though she kept the tally for nunkie and the house for aunt.
"Well," says I, "'tis a piece of injustice, my dear, and that I'll swear to. Love you this Tom?"
Whereat she hesitated, and stammered, and turned aside her face, and then heaved up her pretty shoulders.
"He is so silly," says she.
"Why, that is the right kind of silliness for a maid, I'll take oath," said I.
But she said nothing, so I tossed a guinea on the table, for I had just taken a fancy to a little entertainment, having nothing to do and being at a loose end by reason of Polly.
"There's that will pay for a bottle of wine," said I, "the which I will put under my jacket by your leave, mistress. And I will be the one to pull you out of your despair."
She looked at me in surprise.
"Oh, I have an eye for a wench," said I,"and I know virtue when it peeps out. And if so be you want Tom, rip me, you shall have him."
"I do not understand you, sir," said she, still wondering.
"See you here, mistress," says I, with a wink, "if you was known to be in the expectation of money," says I, "maybe auntie would sing to another tune."
"Yes," said she, with her mouth open and her eyes.
"Very well," said I, "a gentlemanly haberdasher has clapped eyes on a pretty miss and taken a fancy to her for a daughter."
She stared at me.
"Say that here sits the haberdasher," said I, cocking an eye at her, "a gentlemanly haberdasher that is a widower and is peaking for a daughter that he will never get," says I, "what says auntie and nunkie now?"
She met my glance and presently hers fell. I could see she was quick of wit and took me now.
"But, sir, I do not know who you be," said she, demurely, and fidgeting with her apron.
"Oh, we will better that," says I, remembering of the man on Turnham Green. "Call me Samuel Hogg," said I, "godly Samuel Hogg, of Bristol, that wants a daughter all to himself and is willing to leave her a hundredguineas for a dowry and a thousand on his deathbed."
Her lips parted and her eyes gleamed. Then she gave me a shrewd glance, for she was no fool, and at last she smiled.
"You are very kind," said she.
"Pooh!" said I, emptying the bottle. "You may say that when I see you this evening and confront 'em."
"Confront 'em," she said.
"D'ye suppose I will not pursue that which I propose?" I asked. "I will see auntie, nunkie and all, and so you may warn 'em. The gentlemanly haberdasher, rip me, will visit 'em to-night, for to beg their niece of 'em."
'Twas on that understanding we parted, though I believe the girl thought me gone in liquor and talking foolishly. But that I was not, as she discovered, for I meant to go through with the jest and help a poor female against her shrew of an aunt at the same time.
So that evening when it had fallen dark, sure enough, I presented myself before the Magpie, clothed very old and sober and with a wig to suit, and knocked for admittance. Well, there were they assembled to meet me (for the wench had done her part), looking very expectant and all in a flutter. There was uncle that was broad and shortand of a weak cast of face with a grin on it, and by him was aunt, prim and stiff, but the vinegar of her face sugared over with a smile; and to these were added Cousin Tom, a lubberly big fellow with a booby expression, and a couple more. Why, had I not been used to distinguished company I might have turned white of trembling and bashfulness before them. But as it was, the more the merrier, and, says I, with a congee to aunt,—
"By your leave, madam."
"Sir," says she, "our niece Nancy has acquainted us with your story;" at which, thinks I, "'Egad I'm glad I know her name," the which I had misremembered to ask.