What we request of life is that the tools should be given to his hand or hers who can handle them.—Schreiner.
WOMAN is a human being before she is a mother and all the time she is a mother. And after her active work of motherhood is finished, she will still be a human being, subject to all the ambitions, hopes, desires and interests that humanity has.
Daughters have inherited tendencies from their fathers as well as from their mothers, and all daughters have done this from prehistoric times to the present. Sons have belonged to mothers as well as to fathers. The race is one.
Women can not be limited in the expression of this great miracle of life which stirs her soul, as it stirs man’s.
Woman and man are awakening, brain and heart.
Woman must have freedom to work, to think, to find happiness, to express herself. She must be accepted as a part of every part of this becoming Democracy. She must be accepted in the world as it is today. She belongs, not to the past, but to this present.
There is work that she alone can do, and to do this she must be economically free.
The freedom of woman is the most important of all subjects that statesmen and citizens can consider.
Pay mothers for the work they do for the state. Give them the opportunity for economic freedom, that they may be self-respecting, and develop on equal terms with men.
The great need of the world is for better women and men—an evolving race.
There is just one way: we must have evolving mothers.
Servile mothers have slave sonsand stupid daughters, and sometimes criminal children.
Women must be free to choose their occupations.
If they marry, they must recognize the business in marriage and enter into the business partnership with true intelligence.
With no less intelligence must men understand that the contract in marriage can not be unilateral and bring benefit or happiness to either person, nor can the purpose of marriage be best accomplished.
Democracy in marriage is the Great Imperative. We would have a democratic form of government? Democracy must begin at the foundation of all government—the home.
We are ministered unto by the moonbeams and the starlight as well as by the god of day.
ROMANCE is the color and the perfume of life. It is that which gives charm to living. Romance lures us to live. It called us into being, has bound us to life, and does not desert us at its close.
Although Romance is the most intangible thing in the world, the moonshine of living, it is the most real.
It is the will-o’-the-wisp that has led to all invasions, all discoveries, all victories, all heroism, all inventions, all arts, all business, all human endeavor. Without it there would be no marriage. The human race would cease to be.
One of the myths in marriage is to assume that the Romance isall, or will continue under all conditions.
Business belongs to the realm of fact and deals with tangible substances. It has to do with the practical part of life. It gives us food, clothing, shelter. It furnishes us great problems, exercise for body and mind. It is a great factor in the evolution of man.
One of the myths in marriage is to assume that business and business struggles do not enter into the lives of lovers. The fact is that business occupies much of the time of every honest man and honest woman. It is necessary to life. Without work, romance would cease, the human race would die.
The ideal and the real are interdependent in all phases of human life.
In marriage there is a myth that the twain are one flesh. But the two are two, just as surely as one and one make two, unless neither is worth counting.
It might not be such folly for awoman to trust her happiness to a man, if any man could make any woman happy. But happiness is within the power of the individual alone. Nature intended it to be so.
If a woman were an incompetent, unable to earn or provide for herself, it might be well to leave her finances wholly in the hands of her husband.
But women who have the right to give children to society are capable of taking care of themselves and financing their personal interests.
Mothers should be thus capable.
In marriage we must recognize the individuality in the partnership, just as we must the romance and the facts.
A helpless, dependent, undeveloped, sentimental woman is not an inspirer of ideals. The man absorbed and involved in business is not an awakener or reminder of the Perfect.
A little time is necessary for the appreciation of the beautiful, the charming, the wonderful in life.
Leisure to think together and work together on things of mutual interest, is necessary to marriage, or there can be little love.
When lovers are independently dependent upon each other, it is a wonderful privilege to meet.
When lovers are economically free, as they were before marriage, there is no asking of favors nor demanding rights.
When lovers are grateful for the privilege of being together, and meet only when it is a joy to do so, love will abide.
And Romance, that lured them to life, and lighted their path to marriage, will ever illumine the way, even unto death.
If a woman’s desire is to seek ease and luxury, and find oblivion, let her not marry, for that is not the easiest way thither. A woman has neither natural nor moral right to involve others in her selfishness.
If a man wants adoration, comfort, indulgence, cheap service and ease,let him not marry. He probably can get them all with more certainty and with less expense without marrying. A man has neither natural nor moral right to marry for these.
Men and women have not evolved far. “It doth not yet appear what we shall be.”
Higher ideals will lure humanity on and on to a higher state of intelligence, and to better living, to a more refined and nobler justice than we have yet imagined.
Men and women will not long be looking for ease, nor want to have what they do not earn.
When love calls, they will respond with intelligence, knowing that this is Nature’s voice, and therefore divine. They will rejoice in the most strenuous exercise of living.
Then with deep joy we can say at the close:
“To live is glorious. I have lived!”
THE MYTH IN MARRIAGEWRITTEN BY ALICE HUBBARDTITLE-PAGE, INITIALS ANDORNAMENTS ESPECIALLYDESIGNED FOR THIS BOOKBY RAYMOND NOTTTYPOGRAPHY BYA. V. INGHAM
PRINTED BY THE ROYCROFTERSAT THE ROYCROFT SHOPSEAST AURORA, NEW YORKMAY, MCMXII