"MISS CLOOT STEPPED OUT UPON THE BALCONY."
"MISS CLOOT STEPPED OUT UPON THE BALCONY."
"MISS CLOOT STEPPED OUT UPON THE BALCONY."
Miss Cloot opened the window, and stepped out upon the balcony.
"Gentlemen!" she said, "I must entreat you to be patient and maintain order. It is impossible for us to accept all of you: I regret to inform you that twelve only amid your vast and imposing throng can be made happy. If you will disperse in an orderly way, you can obtain Offer of Marriage forms, which I will ask you to fill up with particulars of your stations in life, incomes, characters, and other details. I have made arrangements so that the forms can be obtained of any respectable chemist, bookseller, tobacconist, or house agent, or at the Army and Navy or Civil Service Stores.
"All applications will be considered, and the acceptations printed in theTimes,Pink 'Un,Matrimonial News, andExchange and Mart.
"I will now entreat you to disperse quietly, without any demonstration. Good-day."
Three weeks from that time the twelve spinsters were married at St. George's. Miss Cloot had accepted a duke, seven other ladies earls, one a wealthy brewer, two pill millionaires, and the remaining one a poet-laureate. Some time after, the ladies began to return from New York; whether they are any lovelier, I cannot say. Can woman be lovelier than she is? Never mind, I don't want a series of letters about it.
At any rate, those twelve ladies married at St. George's are all very, very happy; which shows that, although beauty and goodness are inestimable gifts, wits are worth having.
J. F. Sullivan.
Watches
Watches
Watches
of All Times
of All Times
of All Times
PAL'S PUZZLE PAGE.
PAL'S PUZZLE PAGE.
GEORGE NEWNES, LIMITED, 8, 9, 10, AND 11, SOUTHAMPTON STREET, AND EXETER STREET, STRAND, W.C.
Transcriber's Notes:Simple spelling, grammar, and typographical errors were silently corrected.Anachronistic and non-standard spellings retained as printed.Title page and table of contents added by transcriber.
Simple spelling, grammar, and typographical errors were silently corrected.
Anachronistic and non-standard spellings retained as printed.
Title page and table of contents added by transcriber.