After that the Farmer ploughed in peace,and no one molested the Farmer'swife when she broughthis dinner.
Farmer
[Notes]
A
FOWLER was bird-catching in the jungle, and snared a wild goose. As he was carrying home his goose, he sat down by a pond. In this pond lived a Tortoise, and the Tortoise put up his nose out of the pond to sniff the air. He saw the Fowler and the Goose, and being a very innocent Tortoise, he feared no harm, but began to waddle towards them.
"Take care, friend!" said the Goose. "This Fowler has caught me, and he will catch you!"
The Tortoise waddled into the water again. "Many thanks, friend," said he. "One good turn deserves another." So saying, he dived down into the pond, and brought up a ruby.
"Here, Mr. Fowler," said he, "take this ruby, and let my friend the Goose go."
The Fowler took the ruby, but he was very greedy, so he said—
"If you will bring me a pair to this, I will let the Goose go."
The Tortoise dived down, and brought up another ruby. Then the Fowler let go the Goose, and said to the Tortoise, "Now hand over that ruby."
The Tortoise said, "Forgive me, I have made a mistake, and brought up the wrong ruby. Let me see the first, and if it does not match, I will try again."
The Fowler gave back the first ruby. "As I thought," said the Tortoise. Down he dived into the pond.
The Fowler waited a good long time, but nothingwas seen of the Tortoise. As you have guessed, whenthe Tortoise found himself safe at the bottomof the pond, he stayed there. The Fowlertore his hair, and went home,wishing he had not beenso greedy.
Person with hat
[Notes]
F
AR away in the forest was the Kingdom of Mouseland. There was a great city, where every Mouse had his little house, with doors and windows, tables and chairs, books for the grown-up Mice, and toys for the children; there were little shops, where the Mice bought clothes and food, and everything they wanted; there was a little church where they went on Sunday, and a reverend little Mouse in a little lawn surplice to preach to them; there was a little palace, and in this palace lived the little Mouse King.
Now it happened that a caravan passed through the Kingdom of the Mice. Not that the men of the caravan knew what a wonderful kingdom they were in. They thought it was just like any other part of the forest, and if they did happen to pass a Mouse fortress, or farmyard, they thought them nothing but heaps of earth. Just so if you were to fly up in a balloon, and look down on your own house from the air, it would seem like a little doll's-house, not fit for a child to live in. This caravan, as I have said, was passing through Mouseland, and encamped in part of it once to spend the night. Oneof the Camels was very sick, and as the owner of the Camel thought it was sure to die, he left it behind when the caravan went away.
But the Camel did not die; he very soon got as well as ever he was. And when he got well he also got hungry; so he strode all over Mouseland, eating up the crops of the Mice, and treading their houses down, until at last he came to the Mouse King's park. He ate a great many trees in the Mouse King's park, and the Keeper went in a hurry and flurry to tell the King.
"O King," said he, "a mountain several miles high has walked into your park, and is eating everything up."
"We must make an example of this mountain," said the King, "or the whole earth may be moving next. Sandy," said he to his Prime Minister, who was a Fox, "go and fetch that mountain to me."
So Sandy the Prime Minister went to seek the mountain that was eating the King's park. Next morning, back he came, leading the Camel by his nose-string.
When the Camel saw how little the King of the Mice seemed to be, he began to grunt and gurgle, and sniffed with his funny mouth. You know a Camel has a mouth which looks as though it had two slits in it, of the shape of a cross; and when he wants to show his contempt for anything he pokes out his mouth like a four-leaved clover, and makes you feel very small. "Hullo," said the Camel, "is this your King? I thought it was the Lion who sent for me. I would never have come for a speck like this." Then he turned round, and walked out of court, and began to eat everything he came across.
The King was very angry, but what could he do? He had to swallow the insult, and make the best of it.However, he determined to watch his chance of revenge; and soon he got it. For after a few days, the Camel's nose-string became entangled in a creeper, and he could not get away, do what he would. Then Sandy the Fox came by, and saw him in this plight. Imagine his joy to see his enemy at his mercy! Off he ran, and soon brought the King to that place. Then the King said—
"O Camel, you despised my words, and see the result. Your sin has found you out."
"O mighty King," said the Camel, quite humble now, "indeed I confess my fault, and I pray you to forgive me. If you will only save me, I will be your faithful servant."
The Mouse King was not of a spiteful nature, and as soon as he heard the Camel ask forgiveness his heart grew soft. He climbed up the creeper, and gnawed through the Camel's nose-string, and set the Camel free.
The Camel, I am glad to say, kept his word; and he became a servant of the Mouse King. He was so big and strong that he could carry loads which would have needed thousands of Mice to carry; and by his help the King made very strong walls and forts around his city, so that he had no fear of enemies. When there was nothing else to do, the Camel even blacked the Mouse King's boots, rather than be idle.
So things went on for a long time. But one day some Woodcutters came into the forest. These men lived all together in a village of their own, and they used to build houses of wood. When anybody wanted a house, he told the Woodcutters, and they used to leave their village and go into the woods. Then they cut down the trees, and sawed them into planks, and shapedthem into the parts of a house. When the house was finished, they put numbers on all the parts, and took it to pieces again, and put it on a raft; and the raft floated down the great river to the place where the house had been ordered. Then they put up the house in a very short time, because you see it was all ready made, and only had to be put together.
These Woodcutters, then, came and settled for a while near the borders of Mouseland; and in the course of their wanderings they found the stray Camel. They promptly seized him, and carried him off.
When Sandy told the King what had happened, the Mouse King was very angry indeed. He sent a detachment of his bodyguard, armed cap-à-pie, to fetch the Woodcutters into his presence. The bodyguard captured two of them, and led them back bound. Then the King demanded his Camel.
"Pooh, silly little Mouse," said the Woodcutters. "If you want it, you must fetch it."
"I will," said the King of the Mice. "Tell your chief, whoever he is, that I hereby declare war upon him."
The Woodcutters laughed, and went away.
Then the Mouse King gathered together all his subjects, millions and millions of sturdy Mice; and they set out for the village of the Woodcutters. The Woodcutters had by this time finished their job, and they had been paid a good round sum of money for it; and the money was carefully put away, with all the other money they had, in a treasury.
Now the Mice were not able to meet big Woodcutters in the field, but they had their own tactics. Night and day they burrowed under the earth. First they madefor the treasury; and though the treasury had stone walls, they got up easily through the floor, where no danger was expected, and one by one they carried off every coin from the treasury, until it was as bare as the palm of your hand. Then they got underneath all the houses of the village; and thousands and millions of Mice were busy all day and all night in carrying out little baskets of earth from beneath the foundations. Thus it happened, that very soon the Woodcutters' village was standing on a thin shell of earth, and underneath it was a great hole.
Now was the time to strike the blow. The layer of earth was so thin, that the least shock would destroy it. So the Mouse King wrote a letter to the Woodcutter Chief, asking once more for his Camel, and in the letter he hid a little packet of snuff. He put the letter in the post, and waited.
Next day, as the Woodcutter Chief was sitting in his house, the postman came to the door—Rat-tat. The footman brought in a letter, and the Woodcutter Chief opened it. He read it through, and laughed. Then he waved it in the air, and said, "Let them come." As he waved the letter in the air, all the snuff fell out of it upon his nose. The Woodcutter gave a terrific sneeze, Tishoo! Tishoo! The thin shell of earth could not stand the shock; it trembled, and crumbled, and fell in, and all the Woodcutters fell in too, and all their village, and nothing was left of them but a big hole.
Then the Mouse King and his army went back to Mouseland; and though they never got the old Camel back (for he was swallowed up along with the Woodcutters), yet no one ever molested Mouseland again.
[Notes]
A
BLACKBIRD and his mate lived together on a tree. The Blackbird used to sing very sweetly, and one day the King heard him in passing by, and sent a Fowler to catch him. But the Fowler made a mistake; he did not catch Mr. Blackbird, who sang so sweetly, but Mrs. Blackbird, who could hardly sing at all. However, he did not know the difference, to look at her, nor did the King when he got the bird; but a cage was made for Mrs. Blackbird, and there she was kept imprisoned.
Bent over looking at blackbird
When Mr. Blackbird heard that his dear spouse was stolen, he was very angry indeed. He determined to get her back, by hook or by crook. So he got a long sharp thorn, and tied it at his waist by a thread; and on his head he put the half of a walnut-shell for a helmet, and the skin of a dead frog served for body-armour. Then he made a little kettle-drum out of the other half of the walnut-shell; and he beat his drum, and proclaimed war upon the King.
As he walked along the road, beating his drum, he met a Cat.
"Whither away, Mr. Blackbird?" said the Cat.
"To fight against the King," said Mr. Blackbird.
"All right," said the Cat, "I'll come with you: he drowned my kitten."
"Jump into my ear, then," says Mr. Blackbird. The Cat jumped into the Blackbird's ear, and curled up, and went to sleep: and the Blackbird marched along, beating his drum.
Some way further on, he met some Ants.
"Whither away, Mr. Blackbird?" said the Ants.
"To fight against the King," said Mr. Blackbird.
"All right," said the Ants, "we'll come too; he poured hot water down our hole."
"Jump into my ear," said Mr. Blackbird. In they jumped, and away went Blackbird, beating upon his drum.
Next he met a Rope and a Club. They asked him, whither away? and when they heard that he was going to fight against the King, they jumped into his ear also, and away he went.
Not far from the King's palace, Blackbird had to cross over a River.
"Whither away, friend Blackbird?" asked the River.
Quoth the Blackbird, "To fight against the King."
"Then I'll come with you," said the River.
"Jump into my ear," says the Blackbird.
Blackbird's ears were pretty full by this time, but he found room somewhere for the River, and away he went.
Blackbird marched along until he came to the palace of the King. He knocked at the door, thump, thump.
"Who's there?" said the Porter.
"General Blackbird, come to make war upon the King, and get back his wife."
The Porter laughed so at the sight of General Blackbird, with his thorn, and his frogskin, and his drum, that he nearly fell off his chair. Then he escorted Blackbird into the King's presence.
"What do you want?" said the King.
"I want my wife," said the Blackbird, beating upon his drum, rub-a-dub-dub, rub-a-dub-dub.
"You shan't have her," said the King.
"Then," said the Blackbird, "you must take the consequences." Rub-a-dub-dub went the drum.
"Seize this insolent bird," said the King, "and shut him up in the henhouse. I don't think there will be much left of him in the morning."
The servants shut up Blackbird in the henhouse. When all the world was asleep, Blackbird said—
"Come out, Pussy, from my ear,There are fowls in plenty here;Scratch them, make their feathers fly,Wring their necks until they die."
Out came Pussy-cat in an instant. What a confusion there was in the henhouse. Cluck-cluck-cluck went the hens, flying all over the place; but no use: Pussy got them all, and scratched out their feathers, and wrung their necks. Then she went back into Blackbird's ear, and Blackbird went to sleep.
When morning came, the King said to his men, "Go, fetch the carcass of that insolent bird, and give the Chickens an extra bushel of corn." But when they entered the henhouse, Blackbird was singing away merrily on the roost, and all the fowls lay around in heaps with their necks wrung.
They told the King, and an angry King was he. "To-night," said he, "you must shut up Blackbird in the stable." So Blackbird was shut up in the stable, among the wild Horses.
At midnight, when all the world was asleep, Blackbird said—
"Come out, Rope, and come out, Stick,Tie the Horses lest they kick;Beat the Horses on the head,Beat them till they fall down dead."
Out came Club and Rope from Blackbird's ear; the Rope tied the horses, and the Club beat them, till they died. Then the Rope and the Club went back into the Blackbird's ear, and Blackbird went to sleep.
Next morning the King said—
"No doubt my wild Horses have settled the business of that Blackbird once for all. Just go and fetch out his corpse."
The servants went to the wild Horses' stable. There was Blackbird, sitting on the manger, and drumming away on his walnut-shell; and all round lay the dead bodies of the Horses, beaten to death.
If the King was angry before, he was furious now. His horses had cost a great deal of money; and to be tricked by a Blackbird is a poor joke.
"All right," said the King, "I'll make sure work of it to-night. He shall be put with the Elephants."
When night came the Blackbird was shut up in the Elephants' shed. No sooner was all the world quiet, than Blackbird began to sing—
"Come from out my ear, you Ants,Come and sting the Elephants;Sting their trunk, and sting their head,Sting them till they fall down dead."
Out came a swarm of Ants from the Blackbird's ear. They crawled up inside the Elephants' trunks, they burrowed into the Elephants' brains, and stung them so sharply that the Elephants all went mad, and died.
Next morning, as before, the King sent for the Blackbird's carcass; and, instead of finding his carcass, the servants found the Blackbird rub-a-dub-dubbing on his drum, and the dead Elephants piled all round him.
This time the King was fairly desperate. "I can't think how he does it," said he, "but I must find out. Tie him to-night to my bed, and we'll see."
So that night Blackbird was tied to the King's bed. In the middle of the night, the King (who had purposely kept awake) heard him sing—
"Come out, River, from my ear,Flow about the bedroom here;Pour yourself upon the bed,Drown the King till he is dead."
Out came the River, pour-pour-pouring out of theBlackbird's ear. It flooded the room, it floated the King's bed, the King began to get wet.
"In Heaven's name, General Blackbird," said the King, "take your wife, and begone."
So Blackbird received his wife again, and theylived happily ever after.
Sitting in book
[Notes]
A
GOAT and a Hog were great friends, and for a long time they lived together. But they were poor, and one day the Goat said to the Hog—
"Good-bye, friend Hog! I am going to seek my fortune."
"Ugh! ugh! ugh!" said the Hog. It was kindly meant, for that was all the ignorant Hog could say. He intended to bid good-bye to his friend, and to wish him good luck.
Goat
The Goat trotted along till he came to the nearest town. He found a grain-shop with nobody in it; so in went our Goat, and ate his fill of the Grain, and whatever he could find. Then he went into the inner room, and sat down.
By-and-by the shopman came in; his little girl was with him, and the little girl began to cry for sugar.
"Go and get some out of the cupboard," said the shopman.
The little girl ran into the inner room to get the sugar, but the Goat was there. And when the Goat saw the little girl, he cried out, in a solemn and loud voice—
"Little girl, go run, go run,Or your life is nearly done!And my crumpled horns I'll stickThrough your little body quick!"
The little girl ran out shrieking. "What is it, my dear?" said her father.
"A demon, father!" she said; "save me from his crumpled horn."
What a terrible thing to happen in a quiet household! The poor man did not know what to do. So he sent for all his relations, and they advised him to try what the parson could do.
So the Parson was sent for, and the Clerk, and the Sexton, with bell, book, and candle. They lit the candle, and opened the book (I think it was a Latin Grammar, which they judged would be enough to scare any demon), and rang the bell; and then the Parson, with his heart in his boots, advanced into the room.
Instantly a horrid groan burst upon his ears (or so he thought), and a deep voice said—
"Parson, fly! or I will pokeThis my crumpled horn into you!You'll admit it is no jokeWhen you feel its point go through you!Sexton, dig his grave, and thenLet the Clerk reply, Amen!"
The Parson dropt his Latin Grammar, and ran away, nor did he stop until he was safe in his own church.
At this the Shopman went down on his knees, and put his hands together, and said—
"O most respectable Demon! whoever you are, Ipray you do me no harm; and I will worship you, and offer you anything you may desire."
Then the Goat came majestically out, walking upon his hind legs, with his grey beard flowing from his chin, and he said—
"Put wreaths and jewels about my neck, and on each of my horns, and round my paws and my tail, and give me sweetmeats to eat, and I will do you no harm."
The Shopman made haste to do all this; he wreathed the Goat with flowers, and put all his wife's jewels upon the horns and paws, and all the jewels he could borrow from his neighbours.
The Goat went home, and showed all this magnificence to his friend the Hog. The Hog winked his greedy little eyes, and somehow made his friend understand that he would like some too. Then the Goat told him how he got the things, and showed him the way to the place.
So the Hog went to the same shop, and found it empty. The Shopman and his little girl had gone out to tell all the town what adventures they had passed through. The Hog grubbed up all he could find to eat, and then went and sat in the inner room.
Soon the Shopman and his little girl came back. The little girl ran inside to take off her little hat, and what does she see but a big black Hog sitting there! The Hog remembered his lesson, and wanted to say some terrible thing as the Goat had done; but all he could get out was—
"Ugh! ugh! ugh!"
This did not frighten the little girl at all. She ran out to her father, saying—
"O papa! there is a big black Hog inside!"
The Shopman got out his knife, and whetted it on the grindstone, and then he went into the room.
"Ugh! ugh! ugh!" said the Hog.
The Shopman said nothing, but stuck his knife intothe Hog. Then there was a squealing and squalling,if you like! But in two minutes the Hog was dead,and in two hours he was skinned and cut up, and bynightfall, the Shopman and his little girl, and alltheir friends, were sitting round a deliciousleg of roast pork, and the Sexton rangthe bell for dinner, and the Parsonsaid grace, and the Clerksaid Amen.
Parson
[Notes]
T
HERE was once a Banker who taught his Parrot the speech of men. The Parrot made such progress that he was soon able to take part in any conversation, and he astonished every one by his intelligence.
One day a Parson came by the Parrot.
"My respects to your Reverence," said the Parrot.
The Parson looked all round him, he looked down at his feet, he looked up into the sky; but no one could he see who might have spoken to him. He could not make it out; he thought it must have been a ghost. Then the Parrot spoke again. "It was I who saluted you," said he. The Parrot was close to the Parson's ear, and now at length the Parson saw him. The Parrot went on—
"O reverend Sir, you teach men how to get free from the chains of their sins. May it please you to tell me how to escape from this cage?"
This was a practical question, but the Parson's advice was not usually asked on such points. He did not know what to say.
"I fear I can be of no use to you," said he, "but I will consult my Solicitor."
The Parson went to see his Solicitor, and paid him six and eightpence. He might have bought the Parrot, cage and all, for half that; but, as I said, he was not a practical man. When he told the Solicitor what business he came about, the Solicitor said nothing at all, but fell down in a faint.
"What can I have said to make him faint?" the Parson thought. "Perhaps it is the hot weather." He poured water over the Solicitor's face, and by-and-by the Solicitor came to.
The Parson was much distressed at having thrown away six and eightpence; but he knew it would be of no use asking the Solicitor to give any of it back, so he did not try. He went back to the Parrot and said—
"Dearly beloved bird, I much regret having no information to give you which may be of use. The fact is, no sooner did I put your question to my worthy Solicitor, than he fell down in a dead faint."
"Oh," said the Parrot, "many thanks, Parson."
The Parson went away to the parish meeting. When he had gone, the Parrot stretched himself out on the bottom of his cage, and shut his eyes, and cocked up his feet in the air.
By-and-by the Banker came in, and saw his Parrot lying on his back, with his feet pointing to the sky.
"Poor Poll," said he, "you're dead, my pretty Poll."
He opened the door of the cage, and tookout the bird, and laid him on theground. Immediately the Parrotopened his wings andflew away.
Person
[Notes]
O
NCE upon a time there was a Lion, who used daily to devour one of the beasts of the forest. They had to come up one after another, when called for. At last it came to the Hare's turn to be eaten, and he did not want to be eaten at all. He lingered and he dallied, and when at last he plucked up courage to come, he was very late. The Lion, when he saw the Hare coming, bounded towards him. The Hare said—
"Uncle Lion, I know I am late, and you have cause to be angry. But really it is not my fault. There is another Lion in our part of the jungle, and he says that he is master, and you are nobody. In fact, when I showed him that I positively would come to you he was very angry."
"Ha!" said the Lion, roaring; "who says he is my master? Show him to me. I'll teach him who rules the forest."
"Come along then," said the Hare.
They went a long way, until they came to a well. The Hare looked down into the well. "He was here just now," said he.
The Lion looked in, and at the bottom he saw what looked like a Lion in the water. He shook his mane—the other Lion shook his mane. He roared—the echo of a roar came up from the bottom of the well. "Let me get at him!" roared the Lion. In he jumped—splash! Nothing more was ever heard of that Lion, and the beasts of the forest were glad to be left in peace. They put their heads together, and composed a verse of poetry, which is always sung in that forest on Sundays:—
"The Hare is small, but by his witHe now has got the best of it;By folly down the Lion fell,And lost his life within the well."
Sitting under a tree
[Notes]
O
NCE upon a time an old Woman was cooking, and she ran short of fuel. She was so anxious to keep up her fire, that she tore out the hairs of her head, and threw them upon the flame instead of fuel.
A Monkey came capering by, and saw the old Woman at her fire.
"Old Woman," said the Monkey, "why are you burning your hair? Do you want to be bald?"
"O Monkey!" quoth the old Woman, "I have no fuel, and my fire will go out."
"Shall I get you some fuel, mother?" said the Monkey.
"That's like your kind heart," said the old Woman. "Do get me some fuel, and receive an old Woman's blessing."
The Monkey scampered away to the woods, and brought back a large bundle of sticks. The old Woman piled the dry sticks on the fire, and made a fine blaze. She put on her cooking-plank, and made four cakes.
All this while, the Monkey sat on his tail, and watched her. But when the cakes were done, and gaveforth a delightful odour, the Monkey got up on his hind legs, and began dancing and cutting all manner of capers round about the cakes.
"O Monkey," said the old Woman, "why do you caper and dance around my cakes?"
"I gave you fuel," said the Monkey, "and won't you give me a cake?"
It seems to me that she might have thought of that without being asked; but she did not, so the Monkey had to ask for it.
Well, the old Woman gave the Monkey one cake, and the Monkey took his cake in high glee, and capered away.
On the way, he passed by the house of a Potter; and at the door of the Potter's house sat the Potter's son, crying his eyes out.
"What is the matter, little boy?" asked the Monkey.
"I am very hungry," whimpered the Potter's son, "and I have nothing to eat."
"Will a cake be of any use?" asked the kind Monkey.
The Potter's little Boy stretched out his hand, and into his hand the Monkey put his cake. Then the little Boy stopped crying, and ate the cake, but he forgot to say thank you. Perhaps he had never been taught manners, but the Monkey felt sad, because that was not the kind of thing he was used to.
The Potter's little Boy then went into the shop, and brought out four little earthenware pots, and began to play with them. He took no more notice of the Monkey, now that he had eaten his cake; but when the Monkey saw these earthenware pots, he began to dance and cut capers round them, like mad.
"Why are you dancing round my pots?" asked the little Boy. "Are you going to break them, Monkey?"
The Monkey replied, capering about all the while—
"One old Woman, in a fix,Made me go and gather sticks;Then she gave me, for the sakeOf the fuel, one sweet cake.That sweet cake to you I gave:In return, one pot I crave."
The Potter's little Boy was very much afraid of this dancing and singing Monkey, and perhaps he was a little bit ashamed of his ingratitude; so he gave the Monkey one of his four pots.
Away capered the Monkey, in high glee, carrying his pot. By-and-by he came to a place, where was a Cowherd's wife making curds in a mortar.
"What an odd thing to do, Mrs. Cowherd," said the Monkey. "Have you a fancy for making curds in a mortar?"
"No," said the Cowherd's wife, "but I have nothing better to make my curds in."
"Here's a pot which will do better than a mortar to make curds in," said the Monkey, offering the pot which he had received from the little Boy.
"Thank you, kind Mr. Monkey," said the Cowherd's wife. She took the pot and made curds in it. She took out the curds from the pot, and put them ready for eating, and some butter beside them. The Monkey watched her, sitting upon his tail.
Then the Monkey got up off his tail, and began to dance and cut capers round the curds and the butter.
"Why are you dancing about my butter?" said the Cowherd's wife. "Do you want to spoil it?"
Then the Monkey began to sing, as he capered about—
"One old Woman, in a fix,Made me go and gather sticks;Then she gave me, for the sakeOf the fuel, one sweet cake.Potter's son ate that, and heGave a pot instead to me.Since to you I gave that pot,Give me butter, will you not?"
The wife of the Cowherd was much pleased with this song, as she was fond of music. "If your kindness," said she, "had not already earned the butter, your pretty song would be worth it." Then she gave him a good lump of butter.
Off went the Monkey in high glee, capering along with the lump of butter wrapped up in a leaf. As he went, he came to another place, where a Cowherd was grazing his kine. The Cowherd was sitting down at that moment, and enjoying his dinner, which consisted of a hunk of dry bread.
"Why do you eat dry bread, Mr. Cowherd?" asked the Monkey. "Are you fasting?"
"I am eating dry bread," quoth the Cowherd, "because I have nothing to eat with it."
"What do you say to this?" said the Monkey, cutting a caper, and offering to the Cowherd his lump of butter, wrapped up in a leaf.
"Ah," said the Cowherd, "prime." Not another word said he, but spread the butter upon his dry bread, and set to, with much relish.
The Monkey sat on his tail, and watched the Cowherd eating his meal. When the meal was eaten, up jumped the Monkey, and began capering and dancing, hopping and skipping, round and round the herd of kine.
"Ah," said the Bumpkin, "what are you a-doing that for?" The Bumpkin was so ignorant that he thought the Monkey wanted to bewitch his cattle, and dry up all their milk.
The Monkey went on with his skips and capers, and as he capered, he sang this ditty:—
"One old Woman, in a fix,Made me go and get her sticks;Then she gave me, for the sakeOf the fuel, one sweet cake.Potter's son the sweet cake got,Gave me, in return, one pot.Cow-wife had the pot, and sheButter gave instead to me.This I gave to you just now:Will you give me, please, one cow?"
"Ah," said the Bumpkin, "'spose I must." He was afraid of the Monkey's spells, and so he gave him a cow.
Away capered the Monkey, in high glee, leading his cow by a string. "I am indeed getting on in the world," said he.
By-and-by, what should he see coming along the road, but the King himself. The King was fastened to the shafts of a cart, which he was slowly dragging along; and jogging by the side of this cart was an ox; and upon the ox sat the Queen. This King had very simple tastes, and so had the Queen.
"O King," said the Monkey, "why are you dragging your cart with your own royal hands?"
"This is the reason, O Monkey!" said the King. "My ox died in the forest, and I drag the cart because this cart will not drag itself."
"Come, sire," said the Monkey, "I don't like to see a King doing draught-work. Take this cow of mine, and welcome."
"Thank you, good and faithful Monkey," said the King. He mopped his brow, and yoked in the cow.
The Monkey began to dance and caper, jump and skip, round the Queen.
"What is the matter, worthy Monkey?" asked the King.
The Monkey began his ditty:—
"One old Woman, in a fix,Made me go and gather sticks;Then she gave me, for the sakeOf the fuel, one sweet cake.Potter's son the sweet cake got,Gave me in its place, one pot.Cow-wife had the pot, and sheButter gave instead to me.Bumpkin ate the butter, thenPaid me with this cow again.Keep the cow, but don't be mean:All I ask for, is the Queen."
This seemed reasonable enough, so the King gave his Queen to the Monkey.
Away went the Monkey, capering along, and the Queen walked after (you see the King could not part with his ox as well as the Queen).
By-and-by they came to a Man sewing a button on to his shirt.
"Why, Man," said the Monkey, "why do you sew on your own buttons?"
"Because my wife is dead," said the Man.
"Here is a nice wife for you," said the Monkey. He gave the Queen to the Man. The Monkey then began his capers again, but all he could find to caper about, was a drum.
"You may have that drum, if you like," said the Man. "I only kept it because its voice reminded me of my wife, and now I have another."
"Thank you, thank you!" said the Monkey. "Now I am rich indeed!" Then he began to beat upon the drum, and sang:—
"One old Woman, in a fix,Made me go and gather sticks;Then she gave me, for the sakeOf the fuel, one sweet cake.Potter's son the sweet cake got,Gave me in its place, one pot.Cow-wife had the pot, and sheButter gave instead to me.Bumpkin ate the butter, thenGave a cow to me again.King took cow, but was not mean,For he paid me with a Queen.Now I have a drum, that's worthMore than any drum on earth.You are worth a queen, my drum!Rub-a-dub-dub, dhum dhum dhum!"
So the Monkey capered away into the forest inhigh glee, beating upon his drum, and hehas never been heard of since.
[Notes]
I
N a certain village, whose name I know (but I think I will keep it to myself), in this village, I say, there was once a Milkman. I daresay you know that a Milkman is a man who sells milk; but I have seen milkmen who also sell water. That is to say, they put water in the milk which they sell, and so they get more money than they deserve. This was the sort of Milkman that my story tells of; and he was worse than the more part of such tricksters, since he actually filled his pans only half full of milk, and the other half all water. The people of that village were so simple and honest, that they never dreamt their Milkman was cheating them; and if the milk did seem thin, all they did was to shake their heads, and say, "What a lot of water the cows do drink this hot weather!"
By watering his milk, this Milkman got together a great deal of money: ten pounds it was, all in sixpences, because the villagers always bought sixpennyworth of milk a day.