Dear Jack: Since your last letter I've been in a perfect whirl of gayety—dances, coaching parties and what-not. Really, you would say that I was nothing but a frivolous butterfly of fashion. Next week I am going to the Ver Planks' with quite a party and we are to coach through the Berkshires. The Judsons are to be along and that pretty Miss Dow, of whom I was so jealous when you were here, do you remember? I met a Mr. Cockrell, who, it seems, was at Lawrenceville. He told me you were going to be a phenomenal football player, captain of the team next year, and all sorts of wonderful things. Headmiresyoutremendously. I was so pleased! Don't forget to write soon.As ever,Josephine.
Dear Jack: Since your last letter I've been in a perfect whirl of gayety—dances, coaching parties and what-not. Really, you would say that I was nothing but a frivolous butterfly of fashion. Next week I am going to the Ver Planks' with quite a party and we are to coach through the Berkshires. The Judsons are to be along and that pretty Miss Dow, of whom I was so jealous when you were here, do you remember? I met a Mr. Cockrell, who, it seems, was at Lawrenceville. He told me you were going to be a phenomenal football player, captain of the team next year, and all sorts of wonderful things. Headmiresyoutremendously. I was so pleased! Don't forget to write soon.
As ever,Josephine.
This letter, as indeed all her letters did, left Dink trapezing, so to speak, from one emotion to another. He had not acquired that knowledge, which indeed is never acquired, of valuing to a nicety the intents, insinuations and complexities of the feminine school of literature.
There were things that sent him soaring like a Japanese kite and there were things, notably the reference to Ver Plank, that tumbled him as awkwardly down.
He immediately seized upon pen and paper. It had, perhaps, been his fault. He would conduct the correspondence on a more serious tone. He would be a little—daring.
At the start he fell into the usual inky deliberation. "Dear Josephine" was so inadequate. "My dear Josephine" had—or did it not have—just an extra little touch of tenderness, a peculiar claim to possession. But if so, would it be too bold or too sentimental? He wrote boldly:
"My dear Josephine:"
Then he considered. Unfortunately, at that time the late lamented Pete Daly, in the halls of the likewise lamented Weber and Fields, was singing dusky love songs to a lady likewise entitled "My Josephine." The connection was unthinkable. Dink tore the page into minute bits and, selecting another, sighed and returned to the old formula.
Here another long pause succeeded while he searched for a sentiment or a resolve that would raise him in her estimation. It is a mood in which the direction of a lifetime is sometimes bartered for a phrase. So it happened withDink. Suddenly his face lit up and he started to write:
Dear Josephine: Your letter came to me just as I was writing you of a plan I have been thinking of for weeks. I have decided not to go to college. Of course, it would be a great pleasure and, perhaps, I look upon life too seriously, as you often tell me; but I want to get to work, to feel that I am standing on my own feet, and four years seems an awful time to wait,—for that. What do you think? I do hope you understand justwhatI mean. It is very serious to me, the most serious thing in the world.I'm glad you're having a good time.Don't write such nonsense about Miss Dow; you know there's nothing in that direction. Do write and tell me what you think about my plan.Faithfully yours,Jack.P. S. When are you going to send me that new photograph? I have only three of you now, a real one and two kodaks. I'm glad you're having a good time.
Dear Josephine: Your letter came to me just as I was writing you of a plan I have been thinking of for weeks. I have decided not to go to college. Of course, it would be a great pleasure and, perhaps, I look upon life too seriously, as you often tell me; but I want to get to work, to feel that I am standing on my own feet, and four years seems an awful time to wait,—for that. What do you think? I do hope you understand justwhatI mean. It is very serious to me, the most serious thing in the world.
I'm glad you're having a good time.
Don't write such nonsense about Miss Dow; you know there's nothing in that direction. Do write and tell me what you think about my plan.
Faithfully yours,Jack.
P. S. When are you going to send me that new photograph? I have only three of you now, a real one and two kodaks. I'm glad you're having a good time.
No sooner was this letter dispatched and Stover had realized what had been in his mindfor weeks than he went to Tough McCarty to inform him of his high resolve.
"But, Dink," said Tough in dismay, "you can't be serious! Why, we were going through college together!"
"That's the hard part of it," said Dink, looking and, indeed, feeling very solemn.
"But you're giving up a wonderful career. Every one says you'll be a star end. You'll make the All-American. Oh, Dink!"
"Don't," said Dink heroically.
"But, I say, what's happened?"
"It's—it's a family matter," said Stover, who on such occasions, it will he perceived, had a strong family feeling.
"Is it decided?" said Tough in consternation.
"Unless stocks take a turn," said Dink.
McCarty was heartbroken, Dink rather pleased, with the new role that, somehow, lifted him from his fellows in dignity and seriousness and seemed to cut down the seven years. All that week he waited hopefully for her answer. She must understand now the inflexibility of his character and the intensity of his devotion. His letter told everything, and yet in such a delicate manner that she must honor him the more for the generous way in which he took everything upon himself, offered everything and asked nothing. He was so confidently happyand elated with the vexed decision of his affairs that he even took the Millionaire Baby over to the Jigger Shop and stood treat, after a few words of paternal advice which went unheeded.
Toward the beginning of the third week in the early days of November, as the squad was returning from practice Tough said casually:
"I say, did you get a letter from Sis?"
"No," said Dink with difficulty.
"You probably have one at the house. She's engaged."
"What?" said Dink faintly. The word seemed to be spoken from another mouth.
"Engaged to that Ver Plank fellow that was hanging around. I think he's a mutt."
"Oh, yes—Ver Plank."
"Gee, it gave me quite a jolt!"
"Oh, I—I rather expected it."
He left Tough, wondering how he had had the strength to answer.
"Look out, you're treading on my toes," said the Gutter Pup next him.
He mumbled something and his teeth closed over his tongue in the effort to bring the sharp sense of pain. He went to his box; the letter was there. He went to his room and laid it on the table, going to the window and staring out. Then he sat down heavily, rested his head in his hands and read:
Dear Jack: I'm writing to you among the first, for I want you particularly to know how happy I am. Mr. Ver Plank——
Dear Jack: I'm writing to you among the first, for I want you particularly to know how happy I am. Mr. Ver Plank——
He put the letter down; indeed, he could not see to read any further. There was nothing more to read—nothing mattered. It was all over, the light was gone, everything was topsy-turvy. He could not understand—but it was over—all over. There was nothing left.
Some time later the Tennessee Shad came loping down the hall, tried the door and, finding it locked, called out:
"What the deuce—open up!"
Dink, in terror, rose from the table where he had remained motionless. He caught up the letter and hastily stuffed it in his desk, saying gruffly:
"In a moment."
Then he dabbed a sponge over his face, pressed his hands to his temples and, steadying himself, unlocked the door.
"For the love of Mike!" said the indignant Tennessee Shad, and then, catching sight of Dink, stopped. "Dink, what is the matter?"
"It's—it's my mother," said Dink desperately.
"She's not dead?"
"No—no——" said Dink, now free to suffocate, "not yet."
This providential appearance of his mother mercifully allowed Dink anopportunity to suffer without fear of disgrace in the eyes of the unemotional Tennessee Shad.
That very night, as soon as the Shad had departed in search of Beekstein's guiding mathematical hand, Dink sat down heroically to frame his letter of congratulations. He would show her that, though she looked upon him as a boy, there was in him the courage that never cries out. She had played with him, but at least she should look back with admiration.
"Dear Miss McCarty," he wrote—that much he owed to his own dignity, and that should be his only reproach. The rest should be in the tone of levity, the smile that shows no ache.
Dear Miss McCarty: Of course, it was no surprise to me. I saw it coming long ago. Mr. Ver Plank seems to me a most estimable young man. You will be very congenial, I am sure, and very happy. Thank you for letting me know among the first. That wasbullyof you! Givemy very best congratulations to Mr. Ver Plank and tell him I think he's a very lucky fellow.Faithfully yours,Jack.
Dear Miss McCarty: Of course, it was no surprise to me. I saw it coming long ago. Mr. Ver Plank seems to me a most estimable young man. You will be very congenial, I am sure, and very happy. Thank you for letting me know among the first. That wasbullyof you! Givemy very best congratulations to Mr. Ver Plank and tell him I think he's a very lucky fellow.
Faithfully yours,Jack.
He had resolved to sign formally "Cordially yours—John H. Stover." But toward the end his resolution weakened. He would be faithful, even if she were not. Perhaps, when she read it and thought it over she would feel a little remorse, a little acute sorrow. Imbued with the thought, he stood looking at the letter, which somehow brought a little consolation, a little pride into the night of his misery. It was a good letter—a very good letter. He read it over three times and then, going to the washstand, took up the sponge and pressed out a lachrymal drop that fell directly over the "Faithfully yours."
It made a blot that no one could have looked at unmoved.
He hastily sealed the letter and slipping out the house, went over and mailed it with his own hands. It was the farewell—he would never toil out his heart over another. And with it went John Stover, the faithful cavalier. Another John Stover had arisen, the man of heroic sorrows.
For a whole week faithfully he was true to hisgrief, keeping his own company, eating out his heart, suffering as only that first deception can inflict sorrow. And he sought nothing else. He hoped—he hoped that he would go on suffering for years and years, saddened and deceived.
But, somehow—though, of course, deep down within him nothing would ever change—the gloom gradually lifted. The call of his fellows began to be heard again. The glances of the under formers that followed his public appearances with adoring worship began to please him once more.
Finally, one afternoon, he stopped in at Appleby's to inspect a new supply of dazzling cravats.
"You've got the first choice, Mr. Stover," said Appleby in his caressing way. "No one's had a look at them before you."
"Well, let's look 'em over," said Stover, with a beginning of interest.
"Look at them," said Appleby; "you're a judge, Mr. Stover. You know how to dress in a tasty way. Now, really, have you ever seen anything genteeler than them?"
Stover fingered them and his eye lit up. They certainly were exceptional and just the style that was becoming to his blond advantages. He selected six, then added two more and, finally, went to his room with a dozen, where he triedthem, one after the other, before his mirror, smiling a little at the effect.
Then he went to his bureau and relegated the photograph of the future Mrs. Ver Plank to the rear and promoted Miss Dow to the place of honor.
"That's over," he said; "but she nearly ruined my life!"
In which he was wrong, for if Miss McCarty had not arrived Appleby, purveyor of Gents' Fancies, would never have sold him a dozen most becoming neckties.
When the Tennessee Shad came in, he looked in surprise.
"Hello, better news to-day?" he said sympathetically.
"News?" said Dink in a moment of abstraction.
"Why, your mother."
"Oh, yes—yes, she's better," said Dink hastily, and to make it convincing he added in a reverent voice, "thank God!"
The next day he informed McCarty that he had changed his mind. He was going to college; they would have four glorious years together.
"What's happened?" said Tough mystified. "Better news from home?"
"Yes," said Dink, "stocks have gone up."
But the tragedy of his life had one result thatcame near wrecking his career and the school's hope for victory in the Andover game. During the early weeks of the term Dink had been too engrossed with his new responsibilities to study, and during the later weeks too overwhelmed by the real burden of life to think of such technicalities as lessons. Having studied the preferences and dislikes of his tyrants he succeeded, however, in bluffing through most of his recitations with the loyal support of Beekstein. But The Roman was not thus to be circumvented, and as Dink, in the Byronic period of grief, had no heart for florid improvisations of the applause of the multitude he contented himself, whenever annoyed by his implacable persecutor, The Roman, by rising and saying with great dignity:
"Not prepared, sir."
The blow fell one week before the Andover game, when such blows always fall. The Roman called him up after class and informed him that, owing to the paucity of evidence in his daily appearances, he would have to put him to a special examination to determine whether he had a passing knowledge.
The school was in dismay. A failure, of course, meant disbarment from the Andover game—the loss of Stover, who was the strength of the whole left side.
To Dink, of course, this extraordinary decreewas the crowning evidence of the determined hatred of The Roman. And all because he had, years before, mistaken him for a commercial traveler and called him "Old Cocky-wax!"
He would be flunked—of course he would be flunked if The Roman had made up his mind to do it. He might have waited another week—after the Andover game. But no, his plan was to keep him out the game, which of course, meant the loss of the captaincy, which every one accorded him.
These opinions, needless to say, were shared by all well-wishers of the eleven. There was even talk, in the first moments of excitement, of arraigning The Roman before the Board of Trustees.
The examination was to be held in The Roman's study that night. Beekstein and Gumbo hurried to Dink's assistance. But what could that avail with six weeks' work to cover!
In this desperate state desperate means were suggested by desperate characters. Stover should go the examination padded with interlinear, friendly aids to translation. A committee from outside should then convey the gigantic water cooler that stood in the hall to the upper landing. There it should be nicely balanced on the topmost step and a string thrown out the window, which, at the right time, should bepulled by three patriots from other Houses. The water cooler would descend with a hideous clatter, The Roman would rush from his study, and Stover would be given time to refresh his memory.
Now, Stover did not like this plan. He had never done much direct cribbing, as that species of deception made him uncomfortable and seemed devoid of the high qualities of dignity that should attend the warfare against the Natural Enemy.
At first he refused to enter this conspiracy, but finally yielded in a half-hearted way when it was dinned in his ears that he was only meeting The Roman at his own game, that he was being persecuted, that the school was being sacrificed for a private spite—in a word, that the end must be looked at and not the means and that the end was moral and noble.
Thus partly won over, Dink entered The Roman's study that night with portions of interlinear translations distributed about his person and whipped up into a rage against The Roman that made him forget all else.
The study was on the ground floor—the conspirators were to wait at the window until Stover should have received the examination paper and given the signal.
The Roman nodded as Stover entered and,motioning him to a seat, gave him the questions, saying:
"I sincerely hope, John, you are able to answer these."
"Thank you, sir," said Stover with great sarcasm.
He went to the desk by the window and sat down, taking out his pencil.
There was a shuffling of feet and the scraping of a chair across the room. Stover looked up in surprise.
"Take your time, John," said The Roman, who had risen. Then, without another word, he turned and left the room.
Stover smiled to himself. He knew that trick. He waited for the sudden reopening of the door, but no noise came. He frowned and, mechanically looking at the questions, opened his book at the place designated. Then he raised his head and listened again.
All at once he became very angry. The Roman was putting him on his honor—he had no right to do any such thing! It changed all their preparations. It was a low-down, malignant trick. It took away all the elements of danger that glorified the conspiracy. It made it easy and, therefore, mean.
At the window came a timid scratching. Stover shook his head. The Roman would return.Then he would give the signal willingly. So he folded his arms sternly and waited—but no footsteps slipped along outside the door. The Roman had indeed left him to his honor.
A great, angry lump came in his throat, angry tears blurred his eyes. He hated The Roman, he despised him; it was unfair, it was malicious, but he could not do what he would have done. Therewasa difference.
All at once the bowels of the House seemed rent asunder, as down the stairs, bumping and smashing, went the liberated water cooler. Instantly a chorus of shrieks arose, steps rushing to and fro, and then quiet.
Still The Roman did not come. Stover glanced at the paragraphs selected, and oh, mockery and bitterness, two out of three happened to be passages he had read with Beekstein not an hour before. His eye went over them, he remembered them perfectly.
"If that ain't the limit!" he said, choking. "To know 'em after all. Of course, now I can't do 'em. Of course, now if I hand 'em in the old rhinoceros will think I cribbed 'em. Of all the original Jobs I am the worst! This is the last straw!"
When half an hour later The Roman returned Stover was sitting erect, with folded arms and lips compressed.
"Ah, Stover, all through?" said The Roman, as though the House had not just been blown asunder. "Hand in your paper."
Stover stiffly arose and handed him the foolscap. The Roman took it with a frowning little glance. At the top was written in big, defiant letters: "John H. Stover."
Below there was nothing at all.
Stover stood, swaying from heel to heel, watching The Roman.
"What the deuce is he looking at?" he thought in wonder, as The Roman sat silently staring at the blank sheet.
Finally he turned over the page, as though carefully perusing it, poised a pencil, and said in a low voice, without glancing up:
"Well, John, I think this will just about pass."
The football season had ended victoriously. The next week brought thecaptaincy for the following year to Stover by unanimous approval. But the outlook for the next season was of the weakest; only four men would remain. The charge that he would have to lead would be a desperate one. This sense of responsibility was, perhaps, more acute in Stover than even the pleasure-giving sense of the attendant admiration of the school whenever he appeared among them.
Other thoughts, too, were working within him. Ever since the extraordinary outcome of his examination at the hands of The Roman Stover had been in a ferment of confusion. The Roman's action amazed, then perplexed, then doubly confounded him.
If The Roman was not his enemy, had not been all this time his persistent, malignant foe, what then? What was left to him to cling to? If he admitted this, then his whole career would have to be reconstructed. Could it be that, after all, month in and month out, it had been The Roman himself who had stood as his friendin all the hundred and one scrapes in which he had tempted Fate? And pondering on this gravely, Dink Stover, in the portion of his soul that was consecrated to fair play, was mightily exercised.
He consulted Tough McCarty, as he consulted him now on everything that lay deeper than the lip currency of his fellows. They were returning from a long walk over the early December roads in the grays and drabs of the approaching twilight. Stover had been unusually silent, and the mood settled on him, as, turning the hill, they saw the clustered skyline of the school through the bared branches.
"What the deuce makes you so solemncholy?" said Tough.
"I was thinking," said Dink with dignity.
"Excuse me."
"I was thinking," said Dink, rousing himself, "that I've been all wrong."
"I don't get that."
"I mean The Roman."
"How so?"
"Tough, you know down at the bottom I have a sneaking suspicion that he's been for me right along. It's a rotten feeling, but I'm afraid it's so."
"Shouldn't wonder. Have you spoken to him?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"I'm not sure. And then, I don't know just how to get to it."
"Jump right in and tackle him around the knees," said Tough.
"I think I will," said Dink, who understood the metaphor.
They went up swinging briskly, watching in silence the never stale spectacle of the panorama of the school.
"I say, Dink," said Tough suddenly, "Sis is going to put the clamps on that T. Willyboy, Ver Plank."
"Really—when?" said Dink, surprised that the news brought him no emotion.
"Next month."
Stover laughed a little laugh.
"You know," he said with a bit of confusion, "I fancied I was terribly in love with Josephine myself—for a little while."
"Sure," said Tough without surprise. "Jo would flirt with anything that had long pants on."
"Yes, she's a flirt," said Stover, and the judgment sounded like the swish of shears cutting away angels' wings.
They separated at the campus and Stover went toward the Kennedy. Half-way there an excitedlittle urchin came rushing up, pulling off his cap.
"Well, what is it, youngster?" said Stover, who didn't recognize him.
"Please, sir," said the young hero worshiper, producing a photograph of the team from under his jacket, "would you mind putting your name on this? I should be awfully obliged."
Stover took it and wrote his name.
"Who is this?"
"Williams, Jigs Williams, sir, over in the Cleve."
"Well, Jigs, there you are."
"Oh, thank you. Say——"
"Well?"
"Aren't you going to have an individual photograph?"
"No, of course not," said Stover with only outward gruffness.
"All the fellows are crazy for one, sir."
"Run along, now," said Stover with a pleased laugh. He stood on the steps, watching the elated Jigs go scudding across the Circle, and then went into the Kennedy. In his box was a letter of congratulation from Miss Dow. He read it smiling, and then took up the photograph and examined it more critically.
"She's a dear little girl," he said. "Devilish smart figure."
Miss Dow, of course, was very young. She was only twenty.
That night, after an hour's brown meditation, he suddenly rose and, descending the stairs, knocked at the sanctum sanctorum.
"Come in," said the low, musical voice.
Stover entered solemnly.
"Ah, it's you, John," said The Roman with a smile.
"Yes, sir, it's me," said Stover, leaning up against the door.
The Roman glanced up quickly and, seeing what was coming, took up the paper-cutter and began to twist it through his fingers. There was a silence, long and painful.
"Well?" said The Roman in a queer voice.
"Mr. Hopkins," said Dink, advancing a step. "I guess I've been all wrong. I haven't come to you before, as I suppose I ought, because I've had to sort of think it over. But now, sir, I've come in to have it out."
"I'm glad you have, John."
"I want to ask you one question."
"Yes?"
"Have you, all this time, really been standing by me, yanking me out of all the messes I got in?"
"Well, that expresses it, perhaps."
"Then I've been way off," said Stover solemnly."Why, sir, all this time I thought you were down on me, had it in for me, right from the first."
"From our first meeting?" said The Roman, with a little chuckle. "Perhaps, John, you didn't give me credit—shall I say, for a sense of humor?"
"Yes, sir." Stover looked a moment at his polished boot and then resolutely at The Roman. "Mr. Hopkins, I've been all wrong. I've been unfair, sir; I want to apologize to you."
"Thank you," said The Roman, and then because they were Anglo-Saxons they shook hands and instantly dropped them.
"Mr. Hopkins," said Stover after a moment, "I must have given you some pretty hard times?"
"You were always full of energy, John."
"I don't see what made you stand by me, sir."
"John," said The Roman, leaning back and caging his fingers, "it is a truth which it is, perhaps, unwise to publish abroad, and I shall have to swear you to the secret. It is the boy whose energy must explode periodically and often disastrously, it is the boy who gives us the most trouble, who wears down our patience and tries our souls, who is really the most worth while."
"Not the high markers and the gospelsharks?" said Stover, too amazed to choose the classic line.
"Sh!" said the Roman, laying his finger on his lips.
Stover felt as though he held the secret of kings.
"And now, John," said The Roman in a matter-of-fact tone, "since you are behind the scenes, one thing more. The real teacher, the real instructor, is not I, it is you. We of the Faculty can only paint the memory with facts that are like the writing in the sand. The real things that are learned are learned from you. Now, forgive me for being a little serious. You are a leader. It is a great responsibility. They're all looking up at you, copying you. You set the standard; set a manly one."
"I think, sir, I've tried to do that—lately," said Stover, nodding.
"And now, in the House—bring out some of the younger fellows."
"Yes, sir."
"There's Norris. Perhaps a little serious talk—only a word dropped."
"You're right, sir; I understand what you mean."
"Then there's Berbecker."
"He's only a little fresh, sir; there's good stuff in him."
"And then, John, there's a boy who's been under early disadvantages, but a bright boy, full of energy, good mind, but needs to be taken in hand, with a little kindness."
"Who, sir?"
"Bellefont."
"Bellefont!" said Stover, exploding. "I beg your pardon, sir. You're wrong there. That kid is hopeless. Nothing will do him any good. He's a perfect little nuisance. He's a thoroughgoing, out-and-out little varmint!"
The Roman tapped the table and, looking far out through the darkened window, smiled the gentle smile of one who has watched the ever-recurrent miracle of humanity, the struggling birth of the man out of the dirtied, hopeless cocoon of the boy.
And Stover, suddenly beholding that smile, all at once stopped, blushed and understood!