The mail brought him the usual miscellaneous assortment of orders and bills, and letters on minor points, and questions as to the typometer. The mail was rather apt to be encouraging in its suggestions of a large trade. Two letters this morning were full of enthusiastic encomium on the use of the machine. In spite of an enormous and long-outstanding bill for office stationery, insistently clamorous for payment—one of those bills looked upon as trifles until they suddenly become staggering—there was, after the mail, a general feeling of wielding the destiny of a large part of the world, where the typometer was a power.
A little woman whose husband, now dead, had been in his employ, came in to get help in collecting his insurance; she was timid before Justin, deeply grateful for his kind and effective assistance. Two men called at different times, for advice and introductions to important people. A friend brought in a possible customer from the Sandwich Islands. There was all that aura of prosperity that has nothing to do with the payment of one’s bills.
Justin took both the friend and the customer out tolunch, his pleasant sense of hospitality only dimmed by the disagreeable fact of its taking every cent of the five dollars he had expected to last him for the week. He was “strapped.” The luncheon took longer, also, than he had counted on its doing. The morning, begun well, seemed to lead up only to sordid and anxious details and a sense of non-accomplishment, induced also by small requisitions from different people presupposing cash from a cash-drawer that was empty.
It was a welcome relief to figure, with Harker’s assistance, on the large sums coming in at the end of the month from Coneways. There were a hundred ways for them to go, but they were to go to Lewiston. Perhaps, after all, as Harker astutely suggested, Lewiston would be satisfied with a partial payment and extend the rest of the note. While they were still consulting, word was brought in that Mr. Lewiston was there.
Mr. Lewiston was a young man, small-featured, black-haired, smooth-shaven, and with an air of nattiness and fashion set at odds at present by a very pale and anxious face and eager, dilated black eyes. He cut short Justin’s greeting with the words:
“I’ve just come over to speak about that note, Alexander.”
“Well, I was just wanting to speak to you about it myself,” said Justin easily. “Have a cigar?”
“Thank you,” said Lewiston mechanically, and as mechanically holding out his hand for the cigar, evidently forgetting it the next moment. “The fact is, I don’t want to seem importunate, but if you could pay off that note fifteen days before date,—a week from to-day, thatis,—we’d discount it to satisfy you. I didn’t want to bother you about it, and I tried outside first, but nobody will take up the paper just now, except at a ruinous rate. If you could make it convenient, Alexander——” Young Lewiston sat with his small, eager face bent forward over his knees, his lips twitching slightly. “You know that money wasn’t loaned on strictly business principles, Alexander, but for friendship; I got father to consent to it. If you could let us have it now, it would save us a world of trouble. It’s really not much—only ten thousand.”
Justin shook his head, his keen blue eyes fixed on the other. “I can’t let you have it, Lewiston; I wish I could! But I’m waiting on payments myself. Can’t you pull out without it?”
Lewiston drew in his breath. “Oh, yes, of course we’ll have to, but it means—Well, I know you would if you could, Alexander, I told father so—father in a way holds me responsible, he was in London when I renewed the note the last time. There isn’t anything to interfere with the payment when it’s due?”
“On my honor, no,” said Justin. “You shall have it then without fail.”
“For if that should slip up—” continued young Lewiston, wrapped in somber contemplation of his own affairs alone; he threw his arms outward with a gesture suddenly tragic in its intensity, paused an instant, then wrung Justin’s hand silently and departed.
“Are you busy, Alexander? They said I could come in.”
“Why, Girard!”
Justin wheeled a chair around with an instantlybrightened face. “Sit down. I’m mighty glad to see you.” He looked smilingly at his visitor, whose presence, long-limbed, straight, clean, and clear-eyed, always elicited a peculiar admiration from other men. “I heard that you had a room at the Snows’ now, while Billy is away, but I haven’t laid eyes on you for a month.”
“I’ve been coming in on a later train every morning and going out again on a very much later one at night. I’m back in town on the paper for a while.”
“Why don’t you settle down to something worth while?” asked Justin, with the reserved disapproval of the business man for any mode of life but his own.
“Settle down to this kind of thing?” said Girard thoughtfully. “Well, I did think of it last year, when I undertook those commissions for you. But what’s the use—yet awhile, at any rate? You see, I can always make enough money for what I want and to spare, and there’s nobody else to care. I like my liberty! The love of trade doesn’t take hold of me, somehow—and you have to have such a tremendous amount of capital to keep your place. By the way, have you sold the island yet?” The island was a small one up near Nova Scotia, taken once for a debt.
“Not yet.”
Girard gave him a quick glance—with the instant penetration of a man who has known hard times himself, he detected the signs of it in another; the perception lent a sort of under-warmth and kindness to his voice as he asked: “How are things going with you?”
“Fine,” said Justin in a conventionally prosperous tone, with a sudden sight of a bottomless pit yawningbelow him. “I’ve had a few things on my mind lately—but they’re all right now. By the way, how do you like it at the Snows’?”
“Oh, fairly well.” Girard’s gray eyes twinkled in an irrepressible smile. “I score high at present. They all approve of me, and I am told that I am the only man who has never run into the Boston fern or got tangled in the Wandering Jew. Miss Bertha and I have long talks together—she’s great. As for Mrs. Snow—she heard Sutton speak of her the other night to Ada as ‘the old lady.’ I assure you that since—” He shook his head, and both men laughed.
“Come to see us. Miss Linden is back with us again,” said Justin hospitably, indescribably cheered by some soul-offered sympathy that lay below the trivial converse.
“Thank you,” said Girard, an indefinable stiffening change coming over him momentarily, to disappear at once, however, as he went on: “By the way, I mustn’t forget what I came for before I hurry off.”
He took some bills out of his long, flat leather wallet as he rose. “Do you remember lending that fifty dollars to my friend Keston last year? He turned up yesterday, and asked me to see that you got this.”
“I’d forgotten all about it,” averred Justin. He had not realized until he took the bills that he had been keeping up all day by main strength, with that caved-in sensation of there being nothing back of it—nothing back of it. There are times when the touch of money is as the elixir of life. Justin, holding on by the skin of his teeth for ten thousand dollars, and needing imperatively at least as much more, felt that with this paltry fifty dollarsit was suddenly possible to draw a free breath, felt a sheer, uncalculating lightness of spirit that showed how terrible was the persistent weight under which he was living. The very feeling of those separate bills in his pocket made him calmly sanguine.
He got ready to go home a little earlier than usual, saying lightly to Harker, who had come in for his signature to some papers:
“Those payments will begin to straggle in next week. Coneways’ isn’t due until the 31st—the very last minute! But he’s always prompt, thank Heaven—what are you doing?”
“Knocking on wood,” said Harker, with a grim smile.
“Oh, knock on wood all you want to,” returned Justin.
He even thought of Lois on his way, and stopped to buy her some flowers. It was the first time he had thought of her unconsciously for a week. While he was waiting for a car to pass before he crossed the street, his eye caught the headline on a paper a newsboy was holding out to him:
GREAT CRASHCONEWAYS & CO. FAILIN BOSTON
GREAT CRASH
CONEWAYS & CO. FAIL
IN BOSTON
“I don’t think Justin looks very well,” said Dosia that afternoon. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, with her arms spread out half-protectingly over Lois. The latter was only resting; she had been up and around the house now for three or four weeks, and, although she looked unusually fragile, seemed well, if not very strong.
The baby, wrapped in a blue embroidered blanket, with only a round forehead and a small pink nose visible, was of that satisfactory variety entirely given to sleep; Zaidee and even Redge, adoring little sister and brother, had been allowed to hold him in their arms, so securely unstirring was their small burden. Lois, who had passionately rebelled against the prospect of additional motherhood, exhibited a not unusual phase of it now in as passionately adoring this second boy. He seemed peculiarly, intensely her own, not only a baby, but a spiritual possession that communicated a new strength to her. Lois was changed. She had always been beautiful, as a matter of fact, but there was now something withheld, mysterious, in her expression, as if she were taking counsel of some half-slumberous force within, like one listening at a shell for the murmur of the ocean.
Not only Lois, but everything else, seemed changed to Dosia, at the same time being also flatly, unchangeablynatural. She had longed—oh, how she had longed!—to be back here. Even while loving and working in her so-called home, she had felt that this was her real home, although here her cruelest blows had fallen on her; even while bleeding with the wrench of parting from her own flesh and blood, she had felt that this was the true home, for here she had really lived—and it was the home of the nicer, more delicate instincts. After the crude housekeeping, the lack of comforts that made the simplest nursing a grinding struggle with circumstance, it was a blessed relief to get back to a sphere where minor details were all in order as a matter of course. The Alexanders, with their three children, kept only one maid now, but even that restriction did not prevent the unlimited flow of hot and cold water!
Yet she had also dreaded this returning,—how she had dreaded it!—with that old sickening shame which came over her inevitably as she thought of certain people and places and days. The mere thought of seeing Mrs. Leverich or George Sutton and that chorus of onlookers was like passing through fire. One braces one’s self to withstand the pain of scenes of joy or sorrow revisited, to find that, after all, when the moment comes, there is little of that dreaded pain—it has been lived through and the climax passed in that previsioning which imagination made more intense, more harrowingly real, than the reality.
Even Redge had been allowed to hold himEven Redge had been allowed to hold him
Mrs. Leverich stopped her carriage one day to greet Dosia, and to ask her, with a tentative semblance of her old effusion, to come and make her a visit—an effusion which immediately died down into complete non-interest, on Dosia’s polite refusal; and the incident was not especially heart-racking at the time, though afterwards it set her unaccountably trembling. Mrs. Leverich had in the carriage with her a small, thin, long-nosed, under-bred-looking man with a pale-reddish mustache and hair, who, gossip said, passed most of his time at the Leverichs’—he was seen out driving alone with Myra nearly every day. He was “an old friend from home.” It had been gossip at first, but it was growing to be scandal now, with audible wonder as to how much Mr. Leverich knew about it.
Her avoidance of George Sutton was as nothing to his desire of avoiding her; he dived with surreptitious haste down side streets when he saw her coming, or disappeared within shop doorways. Once, when Dosia confronted him inadvertently on the platform of a car, and he had perforce to take off his hat and murmur, “Good morning,” he turned pale and was evidently scared to death. After this he only appeared in the village street guarded on either side by a female Snow—usually Ada and her mother, though occasionally Bertha served as escort instead of the latter. The elder Snows, in spite of this apparent security, were in a state of constant nervous tension over Mr. Sutton’s attention to Ada; he had not “spoken” yet, but it had begun to be felt severely of late that he ought to speak. Whenever Ada came into the house, her face was eagerly scanned by both mother and sister to see from its look if it bore any trace of the fateful words having been uttered. Everyone knew, though how no one could tell, that that bold thing, Dosia Linden, had tried to get him once, and failed.
The thing that had unaccountably stirred her most since her arrival was an unexpected meeting with BaileyGirard. Dosia, with Zaidee and Redge held by either hand and pressing close to her as they walked merrily along, suddenly came upon a gray-clad figure emerging from the post-office; he seemed to make an instinctive movement as if to draw back, that sent the swift color to her cheeks and then turned them white. Were all the men in the place trying to avoid her? Dosia thought, with bitter humor; but, if it were so, he instantly recovered himself, and came forward, hat in hand, with a quick access of bright courtesy, a punctilious warmth of manner. He walked along with her a few paces as he talked, lifting Zaidee over a flooded crossing, before going once more on his way. He was nothing to Dosia, the stranger who had killed her ideal, yet all day it was as if his image were photographed in the colors of life upon the retina of her eye; she could not push it away, try as she might.
Of Lawson Dosia had heard only such vague rumors as had sifted through the letters written by Lois; he had been reported as going on in his old way in the mining-camps, drifting from one to another. She heard nothing more now. He was the only one who had really loved her up here, except Lois, who loved her now. Dosia had slipped into her now position of sister and helper as if she had always filled it. She was not an outsider any more; shebelonged.
After this he only appeared in the village street guarded on either side by a female SnowAfter this he only appeared in the village streetguarded on either side by a female Snow
As she sat bending over Lois now, her attitude was instinct with something high-mindedly lovely. The Dosia who had only wanted to be loved, now felt—after a year of trial and conflict with death—that she only wanted, and with the same youthful intensity, to be very good, even though it seemed sometimes to that same youthfulness a strange and tragic thing that it should be all she wanted. The mysterious, fathomless depression of youth, as of something akin to unknown primal depths of loneliness, sometimes laid its chill hand on her heart; but when Dosia “said her prayers,” she got, child-fashion, very near to a Someone who brought her an intimate, tender comfort of resurrection and of life.
“I don’t think Justin seems well,” she repeated, Lois, looking up at her with calmly expressionless eyes from her pillow, having taken no notice of the remark. “He has changed, I think, even in the ten days since I came.”
“He has something on his mind,” assented Lois, with a note of languor in her voice, “I suppose it’s the business—I made up my mind to ask him about it to-night; he has been out every evening lately, and I hardly see him at all before he goes off in the morning, now that I don’t get down to breakfast.”
“Oh, he gave me a message for you this morning,” cried Dosia, with compunction at having so far forgotten it. “He said that Mr. Larue had come in to inquire about you yesterday; he is going to send you a basket of strawberries and roses from his place at Collingswood to-morrow.”
“Eugene Larue!” Lois’ lips relaxed into a pleased curve, a slight color touched her cheek. “That was very nice of him; he knew I’d like to look forward to getting them. Strawberries and roses!”
“I met Mr. Girard in the street to-day, he asked after you,” continued Dosia, with the feeling that if she spoke of him she might get that tiresome, insistent image of him from before her eyes.
“Bailey Girard? Yes; he has a room at the Snows’. Billy’s out West.”
“So I’ve heard,” said Dosia.
It was one of the strange and melancholy ironies of life that the man of all others whom she had desired to meet should be thrown daily in her pathway now, after that desire was gone!
“You’d better not talk any more now, Lois; you look tired, it’s time for you to take a little rest. I’ll see to the children, I hope baby will stay asleep. Let me put this coverlet over you. Shall I pull down the shades?”
“No, I’d rather have the light. Please hand me that book over there on the stand,” said Lois, holding out her hand for the big, old-fashioned brown volume that Dosia brought to her.
“You oughtn’t to read, you ought to go to sleep,” said Dosia, with tender severity.
“I’m not going to read,” returned Lois pacifically. Her hand closed over the book, she smiled, and Dosia closed the door. Lois turned to the sleeping child with a peculiar delight in being quite alone with him—alone with him, to think.
The book was a novel of some forty years ago, called, as the title-page proclaimed, “The Woman’s Kingdom,” and written by Dinah Maria Mulock. A neighbor had brought it in to Lois during the first month of her convalescence—in all the time she had had it, she had never read any further than that title-page.
There is often more in the birth of a child than the coming of another son or daughter into the world. Between those forces of life and death a woman may also gether chance to be born anew, made over again, spiritually as well as physically; in those long, restful hours afterwards, when suspense is over and pain is over, and there is a freedom from household cares, and one is looked upon with renewed tenderness, the thoughts may flow over long, long ways. To face danger bravely in itself gives strength for the clearer vision, and a peculiarly loved child unlocks with its tiny hands springs unknown before.
Lois, though she had been a mother twice before, had never felt toward either of the other children at all as she did now toward this little boy. She could not bear to be parted from him. Somehow that terrible corrosive selfishness had been blessedly taken away from her—for a little while only? She only felt at first that she must not think of those horrible depths, for fear of slipping back into the pit again; even to think of the slimy powers of darkness gave them a fresh hold on one. She put off her return to that soul-embracing egotism. It was sweet to lie there and meet the tender gentleness of her husband’s gaze when he came home, and to talk to him about the baby as a child might talk about a new toy, though she could not but begin to perceive that she was as far, far out of his real life as if she had indeed been a child.
One evening he came in to sit by her,—her convalescence had been a long and dragging one,—and she had paused in the midst of telling him something to await an answer. None came. She spoke again, and raised herself to look. Then she saw that even within that brief space he had fallen asleep, as a man may who is thoroughly exhausted. Thoroughly exhausted! Everything proclaimed it—his attitude, grimly grotesque in the dim light, one legstretched out half in front of the other, as he had dropped into the seat, his relaxed arms hanging down, his head resting sidewise against the back of the chair, with the face sharply upturned. The shadows lay in the hollows under his cheek-bones and in those lines that marked his temples. Divested of color and the transforming play of expression, he looked strangely old, terribly lifeless. He slept without moving,—almost, it seemed, without breathing,—while Lois, with a new dread, watched him with frightened, dilated, fascinated eyes. How had he grown like this? What unnoticed change had been at work? She called him again, but he did not hear; she stretched out her arm, but he was just beyond reach. Suddenly it seemed to her that he was dead, and that she could never reach him again; an icy hand seemed to have been laid on her heart. What if never, never, never——
Just then he opened his eyes and sat up, saying naturally, “Did you speak?”
“Oh, you frightened me so! Don’t go to sleep like that again,” said Lois, with a shaking voice. “Come here.”
He came and knelt down by her, and she pressed his cheek close to hers with a rush of painful emotion. “Why, you mustn’t get worked up over a little thing like that,” he objected lightly, going out of the room afterwards with a reassuring smile at her, while she gazed after him with strangely awakened eyes. For the first time in months, she thought of him without any idea of benefit to herself.
The next day the neighbor sent her over the book; the title arrested her attention oddly—“The Woman’s Kingdom.” Another phrase correlated with it in hermemory—“Queen of the Home.” The home was supposed to be woman’s domain, where she was the sovereign power; there she was helper, sustainer, director, the dear dispenser of favors.The Woman’s Kingdom, Queen of the Home.Gradually the words drew her down long lanes of retrospect, led by the rose-leaf touch of the baby’s fingers;theykept her strong. What kingdom had she ever made her own? She poor, bedraggled, complaining suppliant, a beggar where she should have been a queen! Home and the heart of her husband—there lay her woman’s kingdom, her realm, her God-given province. She had had the ordering of it, none other; she had married a good man. Glad or sorry, that kingdom was as her rule made it; she must be judged by her government—as she was queen enough to hold it. She fell asleep that day thinking of the words.
Day by day, other thoughts came to her more or less disconnectedly,—set in motion by those magic words,—when she lay at rest in the afternoons, with the book in her fingers and the dear little baby form close beside her. Lois was one of those women of intense feeling who can never perceive from imagination, but only from experience—who cannot even adequately sympathize with sorrows and conditions which they have not personally lived through. No advice touches them, for the words that embody it are in a language not yet understood. The mistakes of the past seem to have been necessary, when they look back. Given the same circumstances, they could not have acted differently; but they seldom look back—the present, that is always climbing on into the future, occupies them exclusively.
Lois with “The Woman’s Kingdom” in her hand, feltthat some source of power and happiness which she had not realized had slipped from her grasp, yet might still be hers. So many disconnected, half-childish thoughts came with the words—historic names of women whom men had loved devotedly, who had kept them as their friends and lovers even when they themselves had grown old, women who had never lost their charm. There were those women of the French salons, who could interest even other generations; Queens indeed! She couldn’t really interest one man! She thought over the married couples of her acquaintance, in search of those who should reveal some secret, some guiding light. One woman across the street had no other object in life than purveying to the household comfort of her husband, and seemed, good soul, to expect nothing from him in return; if William liked his fish, she was repaid. A couple farther down appeared to be held together by the fact of marriage, nothing more; they were bored to death by each other’s society. Another couple were happily absorbed in their children, to whom they were both sacrificially subordinate. With none of these conditions could Lois be satisfied. Then, there were the women who always spoke as if a man were an animal and a woman were not a woman, but a spirit; but Lois was very much a woman! She settled at last, after penetrative thought, on one husband and wife, the latter a plain little person no longer young. Every man liked to go to her charming, comfortable house; every man admired her; and that her husband, a very handsome man himself, admired her most of all was unobtrusively evident. Every look, every gesture, betrayed the charming, vivifying unity between those two. How was it accomplished?
How could one interest a man like that? There was Eugene Larue—she could interest him! The thought of him always gave her a sense of conscious power; he paid her homage. She did not know what his relations were with other women, but of his with her she was sure: she felt her woman’s kingdom. If you could talk to the soul of a man like that as if he had the soul of an angel, and learn from him what you wanted to know—get his guidance—But Lois was before all things inviolably a wife, with the instinctive dignity of one. The sympathy between her and Eugene Larue was so deep that she feared sometimes that in some brief moment she might reveal in words, to be forever regretted afterwards, conditions which he knew without her telling. To be loved as Eugene Larue would love a woman! But his wife had not cared to be loved that way. Lois took deep, thoughtful counsel of her heart. If they two, she and Eugene, had met while both were free? The answer was what she had known it would be, else she had not dared to make the test—the man who was her husband was the only man who could ever have been her husband. Justin!
With “The Woman’s Kingdom” in her hand now, her lips touching the cheek of the soft little darling thing beside her, she felt that some knowledge had been gradually revealed to her, of which she was now really aware only for the first time. Justin was not looking well—that was what Dosia had said. Oh, he was not looking well! But she would make him forget his cares, his anxieties, with this new-found power of hers; she would bewitch him, take him off his feet, so that he would be able to think of nothing, of no one, but her—he had not always thoughtof her! No, no—she would not remember that,she would not pity herself. She would learn to laugh, even if it took heroic effort—men liked you to laugh, she had always taken everything too seriously. The vision of his sleeping,deadface of a month ago frightened her for a moment, painfully; but he had seemed better since, though, as Dosia said, he didn’t look well. Oh, when he came home to-night——!
She dressed herself with a new care, putting on a soft yellowish gown with a yoke of creamy lace, unworn for months. The color was more brilliant than ever in her cheeks, her lips redder, her eyes more deeply blue. The children exclaimed over their “pretty mamma”; she looked younger, more beautiful, than Dosia had ever seen her. The latter could not help saying:
“How lovely you are, Lois! And you’re all dressed up, too; do you expect anyone?”
“Only Justin,” said Lois.
“Only Justin”! The words brought an exquisite joy with them—only Justin, the one man in all the world for her. There was but a half-hour now until dinner-time. It had passed, and he had not come; but he was often late—Still he did not come; that happened too, sometimes. The two women sat down to dinner alone, at last. The baby woke up afterwards, an unusual thing, and wailed, and would not stop; Lois, divested of her rich apparel and once more swathed in a loose, shabby gown, rocked and soothed the infant interminably, while Dosia, her efforts to help unavailing, crouched over a book down-stairs, trying to read. After an interval of quiet she went up again, to find Lois at last lying down.
“It’s eleven o’clock, Lois; I think I’ll go to bed. Shall I leave the gas burning down-stairs?”
“Yes, please do; he can’t get anything now but the last train out.”
“And you don’t want me to stay here with you?”
“No—oh, no.”
As once before, Lois waited for that train—yet how differently! If that injured feeling rose, for an instant, at his not having sent her word, she crushed it back as one would crush the head of a viper that showed itself between the crevices of the hearthstone. She would not pity herself—she would not pity herself! She knew now that madness lay that way.
The night was clear and warm, the stars were shining, as she got up and sat by the window, looking out from behind the curtain, her beautiful braided hair over one shoulder. The last train came in, the people from it, in twos and threes, straggled down the street, but not Justin. He must have missed that last train out—of course he must have missed it!
We are apt to fancy causeless disaster to those we love; the amount of “worry” more or less willingly indulged in by uncontrolled minds seems at times enough to swamp the understanding. Yet there is a foreboding, unsought, unwelcomed, combated, which, once felt, can never be counterfeited; it carries with it some chill, unfathomed quality of truth.
Lois knew now that she had had this foreboding all day.
“And you haven’t heardanythingof him yet?”
“Not yet, Mrs. Alexander. I’m sorry—oh, so sorry—to have nothing more to tell you. But I’m sure we’ll hear something before morning.”
Bailey Girard spoke with confidence, his eyes bent controllingly on Lois, who trembled as she stood in the little hallway, looking up at him, with Dosia behind her. This was the third night since that one when Justin had failed to appear, and there had been no word from him in the interim. Owing to that curious way that women have of waiting for events to happen that will end suspense, rather than seeking to end it by any unaccustomed action of their own, no inquiry had been made at the Typometer Company until late in the afternoon of the next day, which had been passed in the hourly expectation of hearing from Justin or seeing him walk in. However, nobody at the company knew anything of Justin’s movements, except that he had left the office rather early the afternoon before, and had been seen to take a car going up-town. It was presumable that he had been called suddenly out of town, and had sent some word to Mrs. Alexander that had miscarried.
That evening, however, Lois sent for Leverich, who was evidently disquieted, though bluffly and rather irritatingly making light of her fears; he seemed to be both a little reluctant and a little contemptuous.
“My dear Mrs. Alexander, you can’t expect a fellow to be always tied to his wife’s apron-strings! He doesn’t tell you everything. We like to have a free foot once in a while. Why, my wife’s glad when I get off for a day or two—coaxes me to go away herself! And as for anything happening to Alexander—well, an able-bodied man can look out for himself every time; there’s nothing in the world to be anxious about. He’s meant to wire to you and forgotten to do it, that’s all—I forgot it myself last year, when I was called away suddenly, but Myra didn’t turn a hair; she knew I was all right. And if I were you, Mrs. Alexander,—this is just a tip,—I wouldn’t go around tellingeveryonethat he’s gone off and you don’t know where he is. It’s the kind of thing folks get talking about in all kinds of ways; his affairs aren’t in any too good shape, as he may have told you.”
“Isn’t the business all right?” queried Lois, with a puzzled fear.
“Oh, yes, of course—all right; but—I wouldn’t go around wondering about his being away; he’s got his own reasons. You haven’t a telephone, have you? I’ll send around word to have one put in to-day. I’ll tell you what, I’ll ask Bailey Girard to come around and see you on the quiet—he’s got lots of wires he can pull. You won’t need me any more.”
Leverich’s meeting with Dosia had been characterized on his part by a show of brusque uninterest; he seemed to her indefinably lowered and coarsened in some way—his cheeks sagged, in his eyes was an unpleasant admission that he must bluster to avoid the detection of some weakness. And Dosia had lived in his house, eaten at his table, receivedbenefits from him, caressed him prettily! He had been really kind to her, she ought not to let that fact be defaced, but everything connected with that time seemed to lower her in retrospect, to fill her with a sort of horror. All his loud rebuttal of anxiety now could not cover an undercurrent of uneasiness that made the anxiety of the two women tenfold greater when he was gone.
Mr. Girard had come twice the next morning. Dosia, as well as Lois, had seen him both times; he had greeted her with matter-of-fact courtesy, and appealed to her with earnest painstaking, whenever necessary, for details or confirmation, in their mutual office of helpers to Mrs. Alexander, but the retrieving warmth and intimacy of his manner the day he had avoided her in the street was lacking. There was certainly nothing in Dosia’s quietly impersonal attitude to call it forth. Her face no longer swiftly mirrored each fleeting emotion at all times, for anyone to see—poor Dosia had learned in a bitter school her woman’s lesson of concealment.
But, if Girard were only sensibly consulting with her, toward Lois his sympathy was instinct with strength and helpfulness. He seemed to have affiliations with reporters, with telegraph operators, and with a hundred lower runways of life unknown to other people. He gave the tortured wife the feeling so dear, so sustaining to one in sorrow, of his being entirely one with her in its absorption—of there being no other interest, no other issue in life, but this one of Justin’s return. When Girard came, bright and alert and confident, all fears seemed to be set at rest; during the few minutes that he stayed all difficulties were swept away, everything was on the right train, wordwould arrive from Justin at once; and when he left, all was black and terrible again.
The children had clung to Dosia in the hours of these strange days when mamma never seemed to hear their questions. Dosia read to them, made merry for them, and saw to the household, which was dependent on the service of a new and untrained maid, going back in the interval to put her young arms around Lois and hold her close with aching pity.
The suspense of these days had changed Lois terribly—her cheeks were hollow, her mouth was drawn, her eyes looked twice their natural size, with the black circles below them. Only the knowledge that her baby’s welfare—perhaps his life—depended on her, kept her from giving way entirely. Redge, always a complicating child, had an attack of croup, which necessitated a visit from the doctor and further anxiety. Toward afternoon of this third day a man came to put in the telephone, which set them in touch with the unseen world. Girard’s voice over it later had been mistakenly understood to promise an immediate ending of the mystery.
Everything was excitement—delicacies were bought, in case Justin might like them, Redge and Zaidee were hurriedly dressed in their best “to see dear papa,” and, even though they had to go to bed without the desired result, Redge in a fresh spasm of coughing, it was with the repeated promise that the father should come up-stairs to kiss them as soon as he got in.
Expectation had been unwarrantedly raised so high in the suddenly sanguine heart of Lois that now, to-night, at Girard’s word that nothing more had been heard, asshe was still looking up at him everything turned black before her. She found herself half lying on the little spindle-legged sofa, without knowing how she got there, her head pillowed on a green silken cushion, with Dosia fanning her, while Girard leaned against the little mirrored mantelpiece with set face and contracted brows. Presently Lois pushed away the fan, made a motion as if to rise, only to relapse again on the cushion; she looked up at Girard and tried to smile with piteous, brimming eyes.
“Ah, don’t!” he said, with a quick gesture. His voice had an odd sound, as if drawing breath hurt him, yet with it mingled also a compassionate tenderness so great that it seemed to inform not only his face but his whole attitude as he bent over her.
“You’re very good to be so sorry for me,” she whispered.
He made a swift gesture of protest. “There’s one thing I can’t stand—to see a woman suffer.”
She waited a moment, as if to take in his words, and then motioned him to the seat beside her. When she spoke again, it was slowly, as if she were trying to concentrate her mind:
“You have known sorrow?”
“Yes.”
“Tell me.”
He saw that she wished to forget her own trouble for a moment in that of another, yet the effort to obey evidently cost him much. They had both spoken as if they two were alone in the room. Dosia, who had withdrawn to the ottoman some paces away, out of the radius of the lamp, sat there in her white cotton frock, leaning a littleforward, her hands clasped loosely in her lap, her face upraised and her eyes looking somewhere beyond. So still was she, so gentle, so fair, that she might have been a spirit outside the stormy circle in which these two communed. In such moments as these she prayed for Lawson.
“I”—it was Girard who spoke at last—“my mother—Cater said once that he’d told you something about me.”
“Yes, I remember.”
“It’s hard to talk about it, yet sometimes I feel as if I’d like to. You see, I was so little when we drifted off, she and I. I didn’t know how to help, how to save her anything. Yet it has always seemed to me since that I ought to have known—I ought to have known!” His hands clenched, his voice had subsided to a groan.
“You were her comfort when you least thought it,” said Lois.
“Perhaps; I’ve always hoped so, in my saner moments. No matter how I should try I could never tell anyone what that time was really like. It seems now as if we were wandering for years, but I don’t suppose it was for so very long. We stumbled along from day to day, and slept out at night, always trying to keep away from people, when—she thought we were going back to our old home in the South, and that they would prevent us.” He stopped for a moment, and then went on, driven by that Ancient Mariner spirit which makes people, once they have touched on a forbidden subject, probe it to its haunting depths. “Did Cater tell you how she died? She died in a barn. Mymother! She used to hold me in her arms at night, and make me rest my head against her bosom when I was tired; and I didn’t even have a pillow for her when she wasdying; it’s one of those things you can never make up for—that you can never change, no matter how you live, no matter what you do. It comes back to you when you least expect it.”
Both were silent for a while before Lois murmured: “But the pain ended in happiness and peace for her. It would hurt her more than anything to know that you grieved.”
“Yes, I believe that,” he acquiesced simply. “I’m glad you said it now. I couldn’t rest until I got money enough to take her out of her pauper grave and lay her by the side of her own people at home.”
“And you have had a pretty hard time.”
“Oh, that’s nothing!” He squared his shoulders with unconscious rebuttal of sympathy. “When I was a kid, perhaps—but I get a lot of pleasure out of life.”
“But you must be lonely without anyone belonging to you,” said Lois, trying to grope her way into the labyrinth. “Wouldn’t you be happier if you were married?”
He laughed involuntarily and shook his head, with a slight flush that seemed to come from the embarrassment of some secret thought. The action, and the change of expression, made him singularly charming. “Possibly; but the chance of that is small. Women—that is, unmarried women—don’t care for my society.”
“Oh, oh!” protested Lois, with quick knowledge, as she looked at him, of how much the reverse the truth must be. “But if you found the right woman you might make her care for you.”
He shook his head, with a sudden gleam in his grayeyes. “No; there you’re wrong. I’d never make any woman care for me, because I’d never want to. If she couldn’t care for me without mymakingher—! I’d have to know, when I first looked at her, that she wasmine. And if she were not, if she did not care for me herself, I’d never want to make her—never!”
“Oh, oh!” protested Lois again, with interested amusement, shattered the next instant as a fragile glass may be shattered by the blow of a hammer.
The telephone-bell had rung, and Girard ran to it, closing the intervening door behind him. The curtain of anxiety, lifted for breathing-space for a moment, hung over them again somberly, like a pall. Where was Justin?
The two women clinging together hung breathlessly on Girard’s movements; his low, murmuring voice told nothing. When he returned to where they stood, his face was impassive.
“Nothing new; I’m just going to town for a couple of hours, that’s all.”
“Oh, must you leave us?”
“I’m coming back, if you’ll let me.” He bent over Lois with that earnest look which seemed somehow to insure protection. “I want you to let me stay down-stairs here all night, if you will; I’m going to make arrangements to get a special message through, no matter what time it comes, and I’ll sit here in the parlor and wait for it, so that you and Miss Linden can sleep.”
“Oh, I’d be so glad to have you here! Redge has that croupy cough again. But you can’t sit up,” said Lois.
“Why not? It’s luxury to stay awake in a comfortablechair with a lot of books around. I’ll be back in a couple of hours without fail.”
A couple of hours! If he had said a couple of years, the words could have brought, it seemed, no deeper sense of desolation. Hardly had he gone, however, when the door-bell rang, and word was brought to Lois, who with Dosia had gone up-stairs, that it was Mr. Harker from the typometer office. The visitor, a tall, colorless, darkly sack-coated man, with a jaded necktie, had entered the little drawing-room with a decorously self-effacing step, and sat now on the edge of his chair, his body bent forward and his hat still held in one hand, with an effect of being entirely isolated from social relations and existing here solely at the behest of business. He rose as Lois came into the room, and handed her a small packet, in response to her greeting, before reseating himself.
“Thank you very much,” said Lois. “This is the money, I suppose. I’m sorry you went to the trouble of bringing it out yourself, I thought you might send me a check.”
Mr. Harker shook his head with a grim semblance of a smile. “That’s the trouble, Mrs. Alexander, we can’t send any checks, Mr. Alexander is the one who does that. Everything is in Mr. Alexander’s name. I went to Mr. Leverich to-day to see how we were going to straighten out things, but he doesn’t seem inclined to take hold at all, though he could help us out easily enough if he wanted to. I—there’s no use keeping it back, Mrs. Alexander. This is a pretty bad time for Mr. Alexander to stay away. He ought to be home.”
“Why, yes,” said Lois.
“Exactly. His absence places us all in a very strange, very unpleasant position.” Mr. Harker spoke with a sort of somber monotony, with his gaze on the ground. “The business requires the most particular management at the moment—the most particular. I—” He raised his eyes with such tragic earnestness that Lois realized for the first time that this manner of his might not be his usual manner, but was called forth by the stress of anxiety. For the first time also, the force of the daily tie of business companionship was borne in upon her. She looked at Mr. Harker. This man spent more waking hours with Justin than she did—knew him, perhaps, in a sense, better.
He went on now, with a tremor in his voice: “Mrs. Alexander, your husband and I have worked together for a year and a half now, with never a word between us. I’m ready to swear by him any moment, if I’ve got him to swear by. I’ll back him up in anything, no matter what, if it’s his say-so—we’ve pulled through a good many tight places. But I can’t do it alone; it’s madness to try. If he doesn’t show up, I’d better close the place down at once.”
“Why do you say this to me?” asked Lois, shrinking a little.
“Why? because,—Mrs. Alexander, this is no time to mince words; if you know where your husband is, for God’s sake, get word to him to come back—every minute is precious. He may be ill—Heaven knows he had enough to make him so; my wife knows the strain I’ve been through, she says she wonders I’m alive,—but he can’t look after his health now. If he’s on top of ground, he’s got tocome. I’ve put every cent I own into this business. I haven’t drawn my whole salary, even, for months. I don’t know whatreasons he has for staying away, but his nerve mustn’t give out now.”
“Mr. Harker!” cried Lois. She turned blankly to Dosia, who had come forward. “What does he mean?”
“She doesn’t know where her husband is,” said the girl convincingly. Her eyes and Mr. Harker’s met. The somber eagerness faded out of his; he sighed and rose.
“Anything I can do for you, Mrs. Alexander? I think I’ll hurry to catch the next train; I haven’t been home to my dinner yet.”
“Won’t you have something here before you go?” asked Lois. “It’s so late.”
“Oh, that’s nothing, I’m used to it,” returned Mr. Harker, with a pale smile and the passive, self-effacing business manner as he departed, while Lois went up-stairs once more. The baby cried, and she soothed him, holding the warm little form close, closer to her—something tangible before she put him down again to step back into this strange void where Justin was not.
For the first time, in this meeting with Mr. Harker, Lois realized the existence of a world beyond her ken—a world that had been Justin’s. New as the visitor’s words had been, they seemed to open to her a vision of herculean struggle; the way this man had looked—his wife had “wondered that he was still alive.” And Justin—where was he now?Shehad not noticed, she had not wondered—until lately.
Slight as seemed her recognition, her sympathy, her help, it was the one thing now that kept her reason firm. She knew that she had not been all unfaithful; sometimes he had been rested, sometimes cheered, when she wasnear. She had suffered, too,shehad longed for his help and sympathy. No, she would not think ofthat; she would not! When two are separated, one must love enough to bridge the gulf—what matter which one? It seemed now as if there were so much that she might have given, as if all this torrent of love that nearly broke her heart might have been poured out and poured out at his feet—lavished on him, without regard to need or fitness or expense, as Mary lavished her precious box of spikenard on One she loved. Now that he was gone, there could be nothing too hard to have done for him, no words too sweet for her to have said to him.
Redge woke up and cried for her, and she told him hoarsely to be still; and then, suddenly conscience-stricken and fearful at the slighting of this other demand of love,—what awful reprisal might it not exact from her?—she went to kiss the child, to infold him in her arms, the boy that Justin loved, before she bade him go to sleep, for mother would stay by her darling. And, left to herself again, the grinding and destroying wheel of thought had her bound to it once more.
He could not have left her of his own will! If he did not come, it would be because he was dead—and then he could never know, never, never know. There would be nothing left to her but the place where he had been. She looked at the walls and the homely furnishings as one seeing them for the first time bare forever of the beloved presence, and fell on her knees, and went on them around the room, dragging herself from chair to sofa, from sofa to bed,—these were the Stations of the Cross that she was making,—with sobs and cries, low and inarticulate, yet carrying withthem the awful anguish of a heart laid bare before the Almighty. Here his dear hand had rested, while he thought of her; on this table—here—and here—and here his head had lain. Her tears ceased; she buried her face in the pillow. She must go after him, wherever he was, in this world or another. For he was her husband—where he was she must be, either in body or in spirit.
The telephone-bell rang, and Dosia answered it, the voice at the other end inquiring for Mr. Girard, cautiously, it seemed; withholding information from any other. The doctor rang up, in response to an earlier call, with directions for Redge. Hardly had the receiver been laid down when the door-bell clanged. This was to be a night of the ringing of bells!
This time, of course, the visitor was Mrs. Snow. In any exigency, any mind- and body-absorbing event of life, the inopportune presence of Mrs. Snow was inexorably to be counted on, though it came always as one of those exasperating recurrences which bring with them a ridiculously fresh irritation each time. It seemed to be the one extra thing you couldn’t stand; in either trouble or joy she affected you like a clinging, ankle-flapping mackintosh on a rainy day. She bowed now to Dosia with a patronizing dignity, pointed by the plaintive warmth of the greeting to Lois, who had come hurrying down-stairs out of those passion-depths of darkness so that Mrs. Snow wouldn’t suspect anything. She had an uncanny faculty of divining just what you didn’t want her to.
Once before Lois had suspended tragedy for Mrs. Snow. The same things happen to us over and over again daily in our crowded yet restricted lives—it is we who change in our meeting with them. We have our great passions, our great joys, our heartbreaks, no matter how small our environment.
“How do you do, my dear? Mr. Girard has just told me that he was going to stay here to-night, in Mr. Alexander’s absence. He said little Redge was threatened with the croup. Now, if I had only known that Mr. Alexander was away,Icould have come and stayed with you!”
“Oh, that wasn’t at all necessary,” said Lois hastily. “Thank you very much. Do sit down, won’t you, Mrs. Snow?”
“Only for a minute, then; I must go back to Bertha,” said Mrs. Snow, seating herself and fumbling for something under her cloak. “I just came over to read you a letter. It’s in my bag—I can’t seem to find it. Well, perhaps I’d better rest for a minute.” Mrs. Snow’s face looked unusually lined and set; in spite of her plaintiveness, her eyes had a harassed glitter.
“Isn’t it rather late for you to be out alone?” asked Lois.
“Yes; Ada would have come around here with me, but she was expecting Mr. Sutton. She was expecting him last night, but he didn’t come. IfIwere a young lady, I’d let a gentleman wait formethe next time; it used to be thought more attractive, in my day, but Ada’s so afraid of not seeming cordial; gentlemen seem to be so sensitive nowadays! I said to her, ‘Ada, when a man is enough at home in a house to kick the cat, and ask for cake whenever he feels like it, I donotsee that it is necessary to stand on ceremony with him.’ But Ada thinks differently.”
“It is difficult to make rules,” said Lois vaguely.
“Yes,” sighed Mrs. Snow. “As I was saying to Bertha, you don’t find a young man like Mr. Girard so considerate of everyone—not that he’s soveryyoung, either; I’m sure he often appears much older than he is. It’s his manner—he has a manner like my dear father. He and Bertha have long chats together; really, he is whatIwould call quite attentive, though she won’t hear of such a thing—but sometimes young mendotake a great fancy for oldergirls. I had a friend who married a gentleman twenty-seven years younger—he died soon afterwards. But many people think nothing of a little difference of twelve or fifteen years. I said to Bertha this morning, ‘Bertha, if you’d dress yourself a little younger—if you’d only wear a blue bow in your hair.’ But no; I can’t say anything nowadays to my own children without being flown at!” Mrs. Snow’s voice trembled. “If my darling William were here!”
“Have you heard from William lately?” asked Lois, with supreme effort.
“My dear, he’s in Chicago. I came over to read you a letter from him that I got to-night. That new postman left it at the Scovels’, by mistake, and they never sent it over until a little while ago. There was a sentence in it,” Mrs. Snow was fumbling with a paper, “that I thought you’d like to hear. Where is it? Let me see. ‘Next month I hope to be able to send you more’—no, no, that’s not it. ‘When my socks get holes in them I throw them’—that’s not it, either. Oh! he says, ‘I caught a glimpse of Mr. Alexander last night, getting on a West Side car’—this was written yesterday morning. ‘I called to him, but too late. I’m sorry, for I’d like to have seen him.’ That’s all, but Mr. Girard seemed so pleased with the letter, I promised that I would bring it around to you that very minute,—hehad to run for the train,—but I was detained. He thought you’d like to hear that William had seen Mr. Alexander.”
Like to hear! The relief for the moment turned Lois faint. Yet, after Mrs. Snow went, the torturing questions began to repeat themselves again. Justin was alive—Justin was alive on Tuesday night. Was he alive now? And whyhad he gone to Chicago at all? Why had he sent her no word? The wall between them seemed only the more opaque. Every fear that imagination could devise seemed to center around this new fact.
She and Dosia went around, straightening up the little drawing-room, making it ready for Girard’s occupancy—pulling out a big chair for his use, and putting fresh books on the table. The maid had long ago gone to bed, and there was coffee to be made for him—he might get hungry in the night. When he came in at last, he brought all the brightness and courage of hope with him; he had wired to William, he had phoned to a dozen different places in Chicago.
“Oh, what should we do without you?” breathed Lois, her foot on the stairway.
“It doesn’t seem to me I’ve helped you very much so far, our one clue has been from Mrs. Snow. I want you to go to bed now, and to sleep, Mrs. Alexander; take all the rest you can. I’m here to do the watching. If there’s anything really to tell, I’ll call you, I promise faithfully. What is it, Miss Linden? Did you want to speak to me?”
“There was a message for you while you were gone,” said Dosia in a low tone.
His eyes assented. “Yes, I went there—to the place that they—but it wasn’t Alexander, I’m glad to say, though I was afraid when I went in——”
“I know,” said Dosia.
Another strange night had begun, with the master of the house away. Lois went to her room to lie down clothed, jumping up to come to the head of the stairs whenever the telephone-bell rang, and then going back again when shefound that those who were consulting were asking for information instead of giving it, but by and by the messages ceased.
Suppose Justin never came back! She began to feel that he had been gone for years, and tried confusedly to plan out the future. There were the children—how should she support them? She must support them. It was hard to get work when you had a baby. If she hadn’t the baby—no one should take the baby from her! She clasped him to her for a moment in terror, as if she were being hunted, before she grew calm and began planning again. There was only a little money left—to-morrow they must still eat. She must make the money last.
Dosia, on the bed by Redge’s crib, went softly after a while into the other room, and saw that Lois at last slept, though she herself could not. Each time that she saw Girard he seemed more and more a stranger, so far removed was he from her dream of him; through all his softness, his gentleness, she felt the streak of hardness, if nobody else did—though Mr. Cater, she remembered now, had spoken of it too—that the fires of adversity had molded. Perhaps no man could have worked up from the cruel circumstances of his early days without that hardening streak to uphold him. She divined, with some surprising new power of divination, that in spite of all his strong, capable dealing with actualities and his magnetic drawing of men, for the inner conduct of his own life he was shyly dependent on odd, deeply held theory—theory that he had solitarily woven for himself. She felt impersonally sorry for him, as for a boy who must be disappointed, though he was nothing to her.
Yet, as Dosia lay there in the dumb stretches of the night, her tired eyes wide open, close to Redge’s crib, with his little hot hand clinging to hers, the mere fact of Girard’s bodily presence in the house, down-stairs, seemed something overpoweringly insistent; she couldn’t get away from it. It gave her, apparently, neither pleasure nor pain; it called forth no conscious excitement as had been the case with Lawson—unless this strange, rarefied sense was a higher excitement. This consciousness of his presence was, tiresomely enough, something not to be escaped from; it pulsed in every vein, keeping her awake. She tried to lose it in the thought of Lois’ great trouble, of this weighting, pitiful mystery of Justin’s absence—of what it meant to him and to the household; she tried to lose it in the thought of Lawson, with the prayer that always instinctively came at his name. Nothing availed; through everything was that wearing, persistent consciousness of Girard’s bodily presence down-stairs. If it would only fade out, so that she might sleep, she was so tired! The clock struck two. A voice spoke from the other room, sending her to her feet instantly:
“Dosia?”
“Yes, Lois, dearest, I’m here.”
“Has any word come from Justin?”
“No.”
Lois shivered. “I think, when Redge wakes up next, you’d better give him a drink of water, he sounds so hoarse. I’ve used all I brought up. Do you mind going down to get some more? I would go myself, but I can’t slip my arm from under baby; he wakes when I move. Here is the pitcher.”
“Yes,” said Dosia, stopping for a moment to pull the coverlet tenderly over Lois, before stepping out into the lighted hall.
It seemed very silent; there was no sound from below. Dosia went down the low, wide stairs with that indescribable air of the watcher in the night. Her white cotton gown, the same that she had worn throughout the afternoon, had lost its freshness, and clung to her figure in twisted folds; the waist was slightly open at the throat, and the long white necktie was half untied. One cheek was warm where it had pressed the pillow; the other was pale, and her hair, half loosened, hung against it. Her eyes, very blue, showed a rayed starriness, the pupils contracted from the sudden light—her expression, tired and half bewildered, had in it somewhat of the little lost look of a child, up in the unwonted middle of the night, who might go naturally and comfortably into any kind arms held out to her. The turn of the stairs brought her fronting the little drawing-room and the figure of Girard, who sat leaning forward, smoking, in the Morris chair, with his elbow resting on the arm of it and his head on his hand; the books and bric-à-brac on the table beside him had been pushed back to make room for the tray containing the coffee-pot, a cup and saucer, and a plate with some biscuits; a newspaper lay on the floor at his feet. Notwithstanding the light in the hallway and the room, there was that odd atmospheric effect which belongs only to the late and solitary hours of the night, when the very furniture itself seems to share in a chill detachment from the life of the day. Yet, in the midst of this night silence, this withdrawing of the ordinary vital forces, the figure of Bailey Girard seemed to be extraordinarilyinstinct with vitality, even in that second before he moved; his attitude, his eyes, his expression, were informed with such intense and eager thoughts that it was as startling, as instantly arresting, as the blast of a trumpet.
At the sound of Dosia’s light oncoming step opposite the door, he rose at once, and with a quick stride stood beside her. He seemed tall and unexpectedly dazzling as he confronted her; his deep set gray eyes were very brilliant.
“What is the matter? Is Mrs. Alexander ill?”
“No—oh, no; the children have been restless, that is all,” said Dosia, recovering, with annoyed self-possession, from a momentary shock, and feeling disagreeably conscious of looking tumbled and forlorn. “I came down to get a pitcher of water.”
“Can’t I get it in the dining-room for you?” he asked, with formal politeness.
“Thank you. The water isn’t running in the butler’s pantry, I have to go in the kitchen for it. If you would light the gas there for me——”
“Yes, certainly,” he responded promptly, pushing the portières aside to make a passage for her, as he went ahead to scratch a match and light the long, one-armed flickering kitchen burner. The bare, deeply shadowed floor, the kitchen table, the blank windows, and the blackened range, in which the fire was out, came desolately into view. There was a sense as of the deep darkness of the night outside around everything.
A large white cat lying on a red-striped cushion on a chair by the chilly hearth stretched itself and blinked its yellow eyes toward the two intruders.
“Let me fill this,” said Girard, taking the pitcher fromher—a rather large, clumsy majolica article with a twisted vine for a handle—and carrying it over to the faucet. The intimacy of the hour and the scene emphasized the more the punctilious aloofness of this enforced companionship.
Dosia leaned back against the table, while he let the water run, that it might grow cold. It sounded in the silence as if it were falling on a drumhead. The moment—it was hardly more—seemed interminable to Dosia. The white cat, jumping up on the table, put its paws on her shoulders, and she leaned back very absently, and curved her throat sideways that her cheek might touch him in recognition. Some inner thought claimed her, to the exclusion of the present; her eyes, looking dreamily before her, took on that expression that was indescribably gentle, intolerably sweet.
Dosia has been ill described if it has not been made evident that to caress, totouchher, seemed the involuntarily natural expression of any feeling toward her. Something in the bright, tendril-curling hair, the curve of her young cheek, the curve of her red lips, her light, yet rounded form, with its confiding, unconscious movements, made as inevitable an allure as the soft rosiness of a darling child, with always the suggestion of that illusive spirit that dared, and retreated, ever giving, ere it veiled itself, the promise of some lovelier glimpse to come.
The water had stopped running, and Dosia straightened herself. She raised her head, to meet his eyes upon her. What was in them? The color flamed in her face and left her white, although in a second there was nothing more to see in his but a deep and guarded gentleness as he came toward her with the pitcher.
“I’ll take it now, please,” she said hurriedly.
“Won’t you let me carry it up for you?”
“Thank you, it isn’t necessary. I’ll go along, if you’ll wait and turn out the light.”
“Very well. You’re sure it’s not too heavy for you?” he asked anxiously, as her wrists bent a little with the weight.
“Oh, no, indeed,” said Dosia quickly, turning to go. At that moment the white cat, jumping down from the table in front of her, rubbed itself against her skirts, and she stumbled slightly.
“Take care!” cried Girard, grasping the shaking pitcher over her slight hold of it.
Their hands touched—for the first time since the night of disaster, the night of her trust and his protection. The next instant there was a crash—the fragments of the jug lay upon the kitchen floor, the water streaming over it in rivulets.
“Dosia!” called the frightened voice of Lois from above.
“Yes, I’m coming,” Dosia called back. “There’s nothing the matter!” She had run from the room without looking up at that figure beside her, snatching a glass of water automatically from the dining-table as she passed by it. Fast as her feet might carry her, they could not keep pace with her beating heart.
When the telephone-bell rang a moment after, it was to confirm the tidings given before. Justin was in Chicago.