CHAPTER VITHE KISS OF FRIENDSHIP

Par amistiet l’en baisat en la buche.Chanson de Roland.

For friendship pressed a kiss upon his mouth.W. F. H.

Thekiss is also employed as a conventional salutation between persons who only stand on a footing of friendship or acquaintance with each other. In our northern countries the friendly kiss usually occurs only between ladies, but in this instance its usage is very widely extended. With men and women it is properly only allowable when there is a marked difference in age between both parties, but, on the other hand, it seldom or never takes place between men, with the exception, however, of royal personages who, on solemn occasions, are wont to greet and take leave of each other with more or less sincere kisses of greeting and farewell. Here we find ourselves again in a sphere in which, alas, we have sadly fallen away from the good old ways. In former times, to wit, the friendly kiss was verycommon with us between man and man as well as between persons of opposite sexes. In guilds it was customary for the members to greet each other “with hearty handshakes and smacking kisses,” and, on the conclusion of a meal, people thanked and kissed both their hosts and hostesses. In a description of a wedding in the olden time in the district of Voer in Denmark we read:

“When they had eaten, the parish clerk got up first, put his arms round the parson’s neck, and kissed him on the mouth, saying:Tak for mad, hr. pastor(Thanks for your hospitality, sir priest). Then the parson planted himself against a chest of drawers, and all the women, old and young, went up to him, one after the other, and kissed him on the mouth. Some of the old goodies could not quite reach him, for the priest was a big, tall man, and they had actually to climb on to his boots, though he stooped down to them slightly.” Peder Havgård said that he would not have cared much to be in the parson’s place, for it was a mean and poor country thereabouts, and some of the women were very shabbily-dressed and dirty-looking.

If we glance outside Denmark it appearsthat the kiss of friendship is considerably in vogue. In Iceland it is still a general form of salutation, although of late years there is said to be a certain falling off in its use; and every one who travels in South Germany and Austria can study at the very first railway station the different forms of that kind of kiss which in those countries is specially used by way of leave-taking; officers and students, farmers and merchants, all treat each other to sounding kisses, usually on the cheek. One can observe the same sort of thing in France, but more especially in Italy. I can attest from personal experience that it is looked upon as the most natural thing in the world for people to kiss their intimate friends when saying good-bye, a shake of the hand being far too cold a leave-taking beneath the warm sky of Italy.

It is, however, undoubted that, speaking generally, the custom of kissing, as an ordinary greeting, has immensely declined; in ancient times and in the Middle Ages it was much more frequent than nowadays.

It was the common practice with the Hebrews for acquaintances, when they met, to kiss each other on the head, hands, andshoulders; and it was assuredly with a kiss of pretended friendship that Judas betrayed his Master.

Even the Greeks in former times used kissing as a common salutation; not only friends and acquaintances kissed each other, but also persons who quite accidentally met when they were travelling.

The custom of kissing, however, became less general later on. In a discourse of Dion Chrysostomus, calledFrom Eubœa, or “The Hunter,” is a story of a rustic coming to the city and meeting two acquaintances in the assembly, whom he goes up to and kisses. “But,” says the rustic, “people laughed prodigiously at my kissing them, and, on that occasion, I learnt that it is not customary for people of the city to kiss each other.”[22]

Kissing seems to have been much more in vogue with the Romans, amongst whom it was the usual custom for people to salute each other with a kiss on the hand, the cheek, or the mouth. Many even scented their mouths in order to render their kisses more pleasing—or less unpleasant. Martial lamentsover this usage in a little epigram to Posthumus:

What’s this that myrrh doth still smell in thy kiss,And that with thee no other odour is?’Tis doubt, my Posthumus, he that doth smellSo sweetly always, smells not very well.

This kissing of friends gradually became a veritable nuisance to the country. Fashion ordained that every one should give and receive such kisses, but, in reality, every one preferred evading them. Martial, in another epigram to this same Posthumus, exclaims:

Posthumus late was wont to kissWith one lip, which I loth;But now my plague redoubled is,—He kisses me with both.

and

Posthumus’ kisses some must have,And some salute his fist;Thy hand, good Posthumus, I crave,If I may choose my list.

Under such frightful circumstances people had recourse to shifts which seem almost as unsavoury as the kisses they would escape:

Why on my chin a plaster clapped;Besalved my lips, that are not chapped;Philænis, why? The cause is this:Philænis, thee I will not kiss.

But such artifices, however, are of very little use; no one escapes thebasiatores(kissers). They prowl about the streets and market-places; not even the walls of the home, nor even the enforced solitariness of the most hidden-places served as a protection against them:

There are no means the kissing tribe to shun,They meet you, stop you, after you they run,Press you before, behind, to each side cleave,No place, no time, no men, exempted leave;A dropping nose, salved lips, can none reprieve,Gangrenes, foul running sores, no one relieve;They kiss you in a sweat, or starved with cold,Lovers’ their mistress’ kisses cannot hold;A chair is no defence, with curtains guarded,With door and windows shut, and closely warded,The kissers, through a chink will find a way,Presume the tribune, consul’s self, to stay;Nor can the awful rods, or Lictor’s mace,His stounding voice away these kissers chase,But they’ll ascend the Rostra, curule chair,The judges kiss while they give sentence there.Those laugh they kiss, and those that sigh and weep;’Tis all the same whether you laugh or weep;Those who do bathe, or recreate in pool,Who are withdrawn to ease themselves at stool.Against this plague I know no fence but this:Make him thy friend whom thou abhorr’st to kiss.

All greet one another with kisses; every condition of life, every handicraft, found a representativeamongst thebasiatores. When a man, in ancient times, was afraid of meeting his tailor, it was not so much on account of the latter’s bill as by reason of his kisses.

“Rome,” says Martial, “gives, on one’s return after fifteen years’ absence, such a number of kisses as exceeds those given by Lesbia to Catullus. Every neighbour, every hairy-faced farmer, presses on you with a strongly-scented kiss. Here the weaver assails you, there the fuller and cobbler, who has just been kissing leather; here the owner of a filthy beard, and a one-eyed gentleman; there one with bleared eyes, and fellows whose mouths are defiled with all manner of abominations. It was hardly worth while to return.”

People kissed whenever they met: morning and evening, at all seasons of the year: spring and autumn, summer and winter. The winter kisses seem to have been especially unpleasant, and Martial censures them, in the strongest terms, in his epigram to Linus:

’Tis winter, and December’s horrid coldMakes all things stark; yet, Linus, thou lay’st holdOn all thou meet’st; none can thy clutches miss;But with thy frozen mouth all Rome dost kiss.What could’st more spiteful do, or more severe,Had’st thou a blow o’ th’ face, or box o’ th’ ear?My wife, this time, to kiss me does forbear,My daughter, too, however debonaire.But thou more trim and sweeter art. No doubtTh’ icicles, hanging at thy dog-like snout,The congealed snivel dangling on thy beard,Ranker than th’ oldest goat of all the herd.The nastiest mouth i’ th’ town I’d rather greet,Than with thy flowing frozen nostrils meet.If therefore thou hast either shame or sense,Till April comes no kisses more dispense.

That Martial’s epigrams depict the actual state of the case without any particular exaggeration it may, among other things, be inferred from the fact that the Emperor Tiberius, according to Suetonius, issued an edict against thesecotidiana oscula(daily kisses).

The friendly kiss was likewise much in vogue in the Middle Ages.

InLa Chanson de Rolandthe Saracen king receives Ganelon with a kiss on the neck, and then displayed to him his treasures:

Quant l’ot Marsilies, si l’ad baisiet el’ col;Pois, si cumencet à uvrir ses trésors.(603).

And Ganelon salutes the Saracen chiefs inthe same way, and “they kissed each other on face and chin”:

“Bien serat fait”—li quens Guenes respunt;Pois, se baisièrent es vis e es mentuns.(625, 628).

The friendly kiss is, on the whole, pretty often mentioned in the Old French epics. “Out of friendship he kissed him on the mouth” is a verse that frequently recurs:

Par l’amistiet l’en baisat en la buche.

The kiss of friendship was also exchanged between the opposite sexes. It was the general custom for ladies to salute with a kiss any stranger whether he came as an ambassador, expected guest, or a chance passer-by. In the old French mystery-play of St Bernard de Menton, the Lord of Miolan is sitting one day with his wife and daughters in the hall of his castle, when a squire steps in and announces that some strangers have arrived. The lord of the castle receives them courteously, bids them welcome in God’s name, and at once orders his wife do her duty to them. She, too, bids them welcome, and kisses them; at last it comes to the turn of the little girls, who assure theirfather that they know their duty right well, and are even willing to perform it:

A vostre bon commandementLes bayserons et festoyrons,Trestons le myeulx que nous pourrons,Mon seigneur, à vostre talent.

Which may be rendered thus:

As it is your orders dear,We will kiss and make good cheer,All, so far as in us lies,Since your wishes that comprise.W. F. H.

Whereupon they kiss the strange gentlemen. In the poem of “Huon de Bordeaux” we are told how Huon’s mother, the Duchess of Bordeaux, receives the French king’s embassy with kisses. The queen, in Marie de France’sLai de Graelan, sends an ambassador after Graelan to make his acquaintance, and, when he arrives, goes to meet him, and kisses him on the mouth.

In other Romance countries, too, kissing serves as a common mode of greeting, which fact can be incidentally substantiated by means of philology, inasmuch as the Latin verbsalutare(‘to greet’) both in Spanish and Roumanian, and partially in French, has acquired the meaning of ‘to kiss.’

When Abengalvon, in the oldPöema del Cid, meets Minaya Alvar Fañez, he advances smilingly towards him in order to kiss him, and he “greets” him on the shoulder, “for such was his wont”:

Sonrisando de la boca, ibalo abrazar,En el ombro lo saluda, ca tal es su usaje.

The expression “to greet on the mouth” likewise occurs many times; but also the verbsaludar(‘to hail’) is also used alone, as in the Roumaniansâruta, to express ‘to kiss.’

Even in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries the friendly kiss flourished in France. When Leo Rozmital, the Bohemian nobleman, paid his respects to Louis XI. at Meung-sur-Loire, the king led him to the queen, and both she and all the ladies of her court kissed him on the mouth.

We get further information in a letter from Annibale Caro dated 29th October, 1544. It is addressed to the Duke of Palma, and describes the visit of the French Queen Eléonore to the Emperor Charles V. in Brussels. “When we met,” says he, “the ceremony of reception with kissing of theladies was, in the highest degree, interesting; it seemed as if I had been present at the Rape of the Sabines. Not only the higher nobility, but even all the rest took each his lady, and the Spaniards and Neapolitans were the most eager. It gave rise to much merriment when the Countess of Vertus, Charlotte de Pisseleu, was observed to lean over her saddle to such an extent, in order to kiss the Emperor, that she slid off her horse, and kissed the earth instead of His Majesty’s mouth. The Emperor hurried up to her assistance, and with a smile kissed her heartily (e ridendo la baciò saporitamente). Directly afterwards Duke Ottavio rode up, jumped quickly off his horse, and the Emperor himself conducted him to the Queen’s carriage, and there he was presented to the distinguished ladies. The Duke kissed the Queen’s hand and was about to remount his charger, but the Emperor called him back, and told him that he ought also to kiss Mdme. d’Etampes, who was sitting right opposite to the Queen in the carriage. Like a good Frenchman, he exceeded the Emperor’s order and kissed her on the mouth.”

A vast quantity of other evidence goes toshow how general was the friendly kiss of salutation even during the Renaissance, especially among the upper classes. Henri Estienne satirises it in hisApologie pour Hérodote. “Kisses are allowed,” writes he, “in France between noblemen and ladies, whether they do or do not belong to the same family. If a high-born dame is in church, and any fop of her acquaintance comes, she must, in conformity with the usage prevailing in good society, get up, even if she be absorbed in the deepest devotion, and kiss him on the mouth.”

Even Montaigne expresses his disapproval of such a state of things. “It is,” says he, “a highly reprehensible custom that ladies should be obliged to offer their lips to every one who has a couple of lackeys at his heels, however undesirable he may be, and we men are no gainers thereby, for we have to kiss fifty ugly women to three pretty ones.”

None the less, the friendly kiss held its ground right through the seventeenth and even a part of the eighteenth century. Molière’s marquesses kiss each other whenever they meet; for instance, in the famouseleventh scene inLes Précieuses ridicules, when Mascarille and Jodelet fall into each other’s arms with many warm kisses. InLe MisanthropeAlceste reproaches Philinte with embracing and kissing every one, and “when I ask you who it is, you scarcely know his name!”

Vous chargez la fureur de vos embrassements;Et quand je vous demande après, quel est cet homme,À peine pouvez-vous dire comme il se nomme.

La Bruyère has, time after time, satirised this foolish custom, which, especially at Court, seems to have assumed colossal dimensions; but even in middle-class circles etiquette required men to salute ladies with a kiss.

In an old comedy entitledLe Gentilhomme guespina father presents his son, who is extraordinarily awkward and clumsy. The latter does not know how he ought to behave to the ladies of the house, so the father in despair gives him a dig in the ribs, and whispers in his ear: “He’s bashful. Kiss the lady. One always greets a lady with a kiss.”

... Il est honteux. Là, baisez donc Madame;C’est toujours en baisant qu’on salue une femme,

Molière has made use of this scene inLe Malade imaginaire, where Thomas Diafoirus pedantically asks when he is introduced to Angélique:Baiserai-je?(Am I to kiss?).

In England we come across pretty nearly the same state of things. Erasmus of Rotterdam, in one of hisEpistolæ familiares, expresses his great satisfaction with English customs: “When you arrive every one kisses you; at your departure they bid you good-bye and kiss you; you come back, then fresh kisses. You are kissed when you meet any one, and so, too, when you separate. Wheresoever you go everything is filled with kisses, and if you have only once tasted how delicate these kisses are, and the deliciousness of their savour, you would want, my dear Faustus, to be banished to England for time and eternity.” In another passage, where Erasmus is speaking of the state of the inns in England, which he mentions in terms of unqualified praise, he winds up as follows: “Everywhere at the inns one meets with pretty, smiling girls: they come and ask for one’s soiled clothes; they wash them and soon bring them back again. When the travellers are about to resume theirjourney these girls kiss them, and take as affectionate a farewell of them as if the latter were their brothers or near relations.”

And Holberg in his letter writes: “In England it is considered uncourteous to enter a house without saluting one’s hostess with a kiss.”

Even in the Low Countries the friendly kiss was much in vogue. Adrianus Höreboord, a professor at the University of Leyden, has, in a Latin treatise, investigated the question as to whether the custom of allowing strangers to kiss young girls, widows, and other persons’ wives, on paying a visit, can be said to be in conformity with the laws of chastity. Höreboord’s opinion is that such practice is in no way objectionable: as a kiss can be given without anyarrière penséethe kisses demanded by politeness may be quite chaste.

Erycius Puteanus, the learned Dutch philosopher, on the contrary, holds that the aforesaid custom is not without danger—at any rate to more sensually-disposed temperaments. In a letter on the education of a young Italian girl he writes that he would never suffer any one to kiss his pupil, adding: “OurFlemish girls never do so; they are not so ardent. They do not comprehend the language of love in glances and kisses. In the matter of Italian girls on the other hand, things are quite different, and I teach my pupil the speech of our country and our customs, kissing excepted.”

The kiss of friendship was so general in Germany, even in the eighteenth century, that Klopstock could write to a friend in 1750:Vergessen sie nicht zu mir auf einen Kaffee und auf einen Kuss zu kommen. It seems, however, soon to have fallen into disuse.

As far back as 1747, Lessing had ridiculed it in a poem:

The kiss with which my friend will greet meIs not what’s rightly termed a kiss,But only formal salutationBecause cold fashion bids him this.W. F. H.

Einen Kuss in EhrenDarf niemand wehren.German Proverb.

No one should take amissAn honest-hearted kiss.W. F. H.

Ithas been previously shown by numerous examples that kissing occupies a prominent place in certain ceremonies. It would be easy to multiply instances of this.

We know from Roman law that the so-calledosculum interveniens, which concerned gifts, was exchanged between engaged couples. The law enacts that, in the event of one of the contracting parties dying before the marriage, only a moiety of the presents are to be returned, provided a kiss was exchanged at the betrothal, but, if no kiss had been exchanged, all the presents were to be returned.[23]

The kiss was regarded as the introduction, as it were, to matrimonial cohabitation—initium consummationis nuptiarum; it was symbolical of marriage—viri et mulieris conjunctio. Certain ancient jurists have even discussed the question whether a married woman who has suffered herself to be kissed by a stranger has not thereby rendered herself guilty of adultery.

The decree of the Roman law which, so far as I know, still partly holds good in Greece, is met with again in the Latin countries during the Middle Ages. It was incorporated in the law of the Visigoths (Lex Romana Visigothorum), and migrated thence to the different old Spanishfuerosand the old French law, in which the wordosculumwas also used in the learned formoscle. It was likewise admitted into the law of the Lombards, and Italy is most probably the West European country wheredonatio propter osculumhas been longest retained. We find, even down to our own times, traces of the same in customary laws.

This is probably the only ceremonial kiss that has received legal sanction; but wherever elsewhere we may turn our eyes and investigate old ceremonies, we constantly find the kiss a necessary and important part.

Its usage was, for instance, general at weddings. Thomas Platter, who studied at the University of Montpellier at the end of the sixteenth century, tells us, in his “Diary,” that the majority of marriages took place in private, without witnesses, through fear of witchcraft; though the wedding feast, on the contrary, was celebrated in public with a vast concourse of guests, and with many merry episodes. At the conclusion of the feast the bride was divested of her bridal array, amidst jokes and raillery, smart young bachelors having to take off her garters; and when at last she sat up in bed, clad only in linen, then all the guests, male and female, came and kissed her on the mouth, and the kisses were followed by facetious compliments and good wishes.

Moreover, at the later ceremony of dubbing a knight, the newly-made knight of the Golden Fleece was kissed by the master of the ceremonies, and had afterwards to kiss all the senior knights present.

At certain academical functions the kiss also formed part of the festal ceremony; in the seventeenth century the Dean, when degrees were conferred, kissed all the new doctors and masters.

Even in the guilds we meet with the kiss, though in a somewhat peculiar form. Hübertz tells us that at the ceremony of admitting a member into the Guild of Tanners, the candidate chose for his “Kränzjungfer” a girl who had to be “fairly a maiden.” She painted black moustaches on his upper lip, and the senior member placed a crown on his head. This done, he kissed the latter, removed the crown, and decorated him instead with a “Jungferkranz.” Finally, the senior member made a speech to the new member, and gave him three boxes on the ears, on which the girl kissed him, and washed off his moustaches, whilst “Vater” hung a sword to his waist.

The ceremony of reception into the Guild of Carpenters was followed by a feast, at which the members, as a sign that they were now grown-up, were allowed, on the payment of a mark, to kiss the barmaid, who was usually the innkeeper’s daughter.

It is easily understood that the kiss likewise came to play a prominent part in many different dances and games.

Kiss-dances were very common during the Middle Ages and even later. Montaigne describes one that he witnessed at Augsburgin 1580. “The ladies,” said he, “sit in two rows along the walls of the room. The gentlemen go away and bow to them; they kiss the latter’s hands, and the ladies get up, but without kissing them on the hand. Then each gentleman puts his arm round the lady’s waist, right beneath her shoulder, kisses her, and lays his cheek to hers.”[24]Whether it is the lady’s check or mouth that is kissed, he omits to state; but it is certain that kisses on the mouth were not uncommon.

A Swiss traveller who stayed for some time in France in the middle of the sixteenth century relates that, when he was in Montpellier, he was invited to a ball, and there met a very beautiful young lady; but, he adds, her nose was a trifle too long, and so her partner had great difficulty in kissing her mouth, “as is the general custom.”

The kiss-dance has not yet died out in Germany; but it appears no longer to have the graceful forms of the Renaissance period, if we can trust Fritz Reuter’s description in hisJourney to Belgium. At a wedding when the kiss-dance is to be held, the parish clerk cautiously inquires of the clergyman whetherkissing is regarded as unbefitting his priestly dignity, but when the answer comes short and shrewd, “Kiss away,” he bows to Mrs Black and—smack!—gives her a couple of hearty kisses right on her mouth. Madame was thoroughly frightened, but that did not avail, but every time he swang round with her, she got a proper, smacking kiss.

But it is evident fromRomeo and Julietthat even in England there were dances in which a gentleman was allowed to kiss his partner. All know the beautiful words with which Romeo claims his right:

If I profane with my unworthiest handThis holy shrine, the gentle sin is this:My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready standTo smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss. (I. 5.)

One can still take the same liberty at Christmastide under the mistletoe. I know a young English lady who was offended with an American gentleman who did not dare to avail himself of his privilege, because he thought that this custom was obsolete in Europe.

Kissing in our time still plays an important part in France in the refrains of dance songs.Le Bouquet de ma Mieends with:

Bell’ bergère, embrasse-moi,Embrasse, embrasse, embrasse!

And inRamenez vos Moutons, Bergère, is sung by way of conclusion:

Tombez à genoux,Jurez devant tous.D’être un jour épouxEt embrassez-vous.[25]

There is, I suppose, no doubt that in these games the kiss is given and taken, as thedramatis personæare generally children, but what takes place when adults amuse themselves with theserondes, I do not know; but I consider it probable that the gentleman will demand as his due a kiss, at any rate on the cheek. There also exists an oldronde à baisers, which is very characteristic and merry. In this it is the lady who has to take the first step:

Madame, entrez dans la danse,Regardez-en la cadence,Et puis vous embrasserezCelui que vous aimerez.[26]

As the living expression of the warmest and sincerest human feelings kissing has been credited, in the world of fairy tales and superstition, with a considerable curative and prophylactical power.

We have seen, in the old sagas and ballads, how enchantments are broken by means of a kiss; we have seen how holy men in the legends restore the sick to health by means of a kiss, etc. Kissing has, on the whole, influenced popular credulity to a large extent, and of the numerous superstitious notions concerning it I only quote some few:

If you would protect yourself against lightning you should make three crosses before you, and kiss the ground three times. (Germany.)

If you want to have luck in gambling you must kiss the cards before the game begins. (France.)

If you have the toothache you should kiss a donkey on his chops. (Germany.) This very efficacious advice is found as far back as Pliny.

If you drop a bit of bread on the floor you must kiss it when you pick it up. The same respect is also to be shown to books you have dropped. (Denmark, Germany.)

According to Danish superstition, it is a bad omen when the first person you meet of a morning is an old woman; nevertheless, you can ward off all evil consequences by giving her a kiss. Evil must be expelled by evil.

People kiss little children when they have knocked themselves, in order to take away the pain; they must “kiss them well again,” as it is termed, or, as Englishmen say, “kiss the place and make it well.”

The Greenland mother, who does not understand kissing as expressive of love, kisses her sick child on the breast, shoulders, hips, and navel to restore it to health.

As the loving kiss of a living human creature brings life, health, and happiness, so it is thought, on the other hand, that kisses of a supernatural being bring destruction.

In Lucian’sTrue Historythere is a description of a perilous journey to the realms of fancy. In one of these the travellers came upon a remarkable vineyard wherein all the vines at the bottom were green and luxuriant, but those above had the shape of women. “They greeted us, as wedrew nigh, and bade us halt. Some of us kissed them on the mouth, and those who were kissed lost their understanding and reeled about like drunken men. But worse befell those who had suffered themselves to be embraced by these women; they were powerless to extricate themselves from the latter’s arms, and we beheld their fingers changed into boughs and twigs.”[27]

I will here call your attention to the Roumanian song about cholera, which comes in the shape of an ugly old woman to Vîlcu, and Vîlcu entreats it thus: “Take my horse, take my weapons, but give me still some days so I may once more see my children, which are as dear to me as the light of the sun.” But the old woman stretches forth her bony arms, folds Vîlcu to her bosom, presses her pallid lips to his, and, in a death-dealing kiss, takes his life, whereupon she departs with a mocking laugh. The Roumanian text is here very strong:

Gură pe gură punea,Buze pe buze lipĭa,Zilele i le sorbĭa.Apoĭ cloanza ear ridea,Cu zilele purcedea,Si voĭnicul mort cădea.

Even a spectre’s kiss brings death. In an English variant of the ballad of Leonora, Margaret says to her dead bridegroom, who is knocking at her door at night: “Come and kiss me on the cheek and chin.”—“Perhaps I shall come to thee,” he replies, but:

If I shou’d come within thy bower,I am no mortal man;And shou’d I kiss thy rosy lips,Thy days will not be long.

I shall also call your attention, in connection with the foregoing, to a curious old story of the venomous girl.

A young maiden had from her tenderest years been reared on all the most deadly poisons. Her beauty was marvellous, but her breath was so poisonous that it killed everybody who came near her. She was sent to the palace of Alexander the Great, as the king’s enemies reckoned on his falling in love with her and dying in her arms. When the king saw her he at once wanted to makeher his mistress; but the shrewd Aristotle suspected treachery. He restrained the king, and had a criminal who had been sentenced to death sent for. The criminal was made to kiss the girl in presence of the king, and he fell prone on the ground, poisoned by her breath, like one struck by lightning.

This story can be traced to India. It found its way into several mediæval storybooks and attained great popularity. The monks made use of it in their sermons, and gave it an allegorical interpretation: Alexander was the good, trustful Christian; Aristotle was the conscience; the venomous girl, incontinence, which comprehends everything that is poisonous to the soul; and the criminal is the wicked man who pursues the lusts of the flesh and suffers his punishment. “Let us, therefore, abstain from all such things if we wish to reach Paradise,” is the moral that the monk draws from it at the close of his sermon.

In conclusion I will quote several expressions to which kissing has given rise:

A lady’s hat which was fashionable in England in 1850, and which had no brim to it, got the name ofKiss-me-quick. In contradistinctionto this, the old-fashioned Danish hats with prominent brims were calledKiss-me-if-you-can. We have a modern variant in the Salvation lasses’Stop-kissing-mehat.

In France, during the last century, there was a colour of the name ofBaise-moi ma mignonne, called in England “heart’s-ease”:Look-up-and-kiss-me,Kiss-me-at-the-garden-gate,Kiss-me-ere-I-riseorJump-up-and-kiss-me.

The verb “to kiss” is often used in a figurative sense,e.g., the Italians say of one who likes drinking, “He kisses the flask” (Bacia il fiasco); the Germans say of mean people, “They kiss the farthing” (Den Pfennig küssen); the English too speak of apenny-kisser.

This figurative meaning is not, however, confined to jocose expressions and phrases; on the contrary, it occurs perhaps more frequently in serious prose.

Our whole life, lived in love to our neighbour and nature, is nothing more than one long kiss.

Kaalund somewhere says:

A babe was I not long ere this,But time too swiftly slips;And that is why I press a kissSo warmly on life’s lips.W. F. H.

A similar figurative use is extraordinarily common with the poets. H. C. Andersen, inGoose-grass, says of the lark that it flies past the tulip and other aristocratic flowers only to light on the sward by the humble goose-grass, which it kisses with its beak, and for which it sings its joyous song. The other poets represent the waves as kissing the white beach, the bees, the scented flowers; and the ears of corn in the fields as heaving beneath the warm kisses of the sun’s golden rays. The sun’s kisses areoscula sancta; every creature shares in them, for they are the most beautiful expression of God’s love. Ingemann sings in a morning hymn:

The sun looks down on hut and hall,On haughty king and beggar weeping,Beholds the great ones and the small,And kisses babes in cradles sleeping.W. F. H.

Les coutumes, quelque étranges qu’elles deviennent parfois à la longue, ont généralement des commencements très simples.Max Müller.

Usages, however strange they may sometimes become in the long run, have generally very simple beginnings.—Translated from the above.

Withmost civilised and many uncivilised nations kissing is the natural expression of love and its kindred emotions.

How can it be explained that a kiss has succeeded in getting so deep and comprehensive a significance? How can a trivial movement of the lips interpret our innermost feelings in so eloquent a way that there is not a language which has at its command words approaching to it in argumentative power?

Are we face to face with something primitive, or something conventional and derivative? Is it as natural to kiss when we are transported with love as it is to smile when we are mirthful, or weep when we are sad? In other words, is Steele right when he says, in strict conformity with a Cypriot folk-song previously quoted, that “nature was its author, and it began with the first courtship?”

I shall try to answer this question in the following pages, but, nevertheless, I wish at once to state most expressly that we are now approaching ground where we know nothing, and where no one can with certainty know anything. We can only advance more or less likely hypotheses.

In the first place, it is important to bear in mind that there are many races of people who are quite ignorant of kissing as it is generally understood. Thus it is unknown in a great part of Polynesia, in Madagascar, and among many tribes of negroes in Africa, more particularly among those which mutilate their lips. W. Reade, in one of his books of travel, tells us of the horror which seized a young African negress when he kissed her. Kissing is likewise unknown amongst the Esquimaux and the people of Tierra del Fuego. Certain Finnish tribes appear, from what B. Taylor tells us, not to practise it much. In hisNorthern Travelhe relates that “while both sexes bathe together in a state of complete nudity, a kiss is regarded as something indecent.” A Finnish married woman, on being told by him that it was the usual custom for husband and wife to kiss each other, angrily exclaimed, “If myhusband were to attempt such a thing, faith, I would warm his ears in such a way that he would feel it for a whole week.”

If the question arises as to what these people substitute for kissing, the fact is well-known that, amongst uncivilised races, there is an endless number of different ways of salutation; some smack each other on the arms or stomach, others blow on each other’s hands, others again rub their right ear and put out their tongue, etc., etc. Here, however, we must confine ourselves to the salutations which are suggestive of kissing.

In many places people are in the habit of saluting with their noses. This is the so-called Malay kiss, which consists in rubbing or merely pressing one’s nose against another person’s nose. This nose-salute is found among the Polynesians, Malays, Esquimaux, certain negro tribes in Africa—in short, just among the majority of races which are ignorant of kissing as we understand it.

Darwin thus describes the Malay kiss: “The women squatted with their faces upturned; my attendants stood leaning over them, laid the bridge of their noses at right angles over theirs, and commenced rubbing. It lasted somewhatlonger than a hearty hand-shake with us. During this process they uttered a grunt of satisfaction.”[28]The FrenchsavantGaidoz, who has also described this custom, remarks, “I have many times observed that cats which are fond of one another greet each other in this way; and I myself once had a cat which always tried to squeeze its nose against mine as a mark of affection.”[29]

Everything is in favour of this nose-salute being a very primitive custom, and its origin may be sought beyond the sense of touch; no doubt, in the sense of smell.

Spencer has arrived at the following conclusions: The sheep bleats after her little lamb which has run away. It sniffs at several lambs that are skipping about near her, and at last recognises her own by means of the sense of smell, and undoubtedly feels great delight at recognising it. In consequence of assiduous repetitions of this a certain relation is developed between the two factors, so that the smell of the lamb excites joy in the sheep.

As every animal has its peculiar smell, so, too, has every human being. When the patriarch Isaac grew old his eyes began toget dim, and he could not see. He wished to bless his eldest son, Esau, but Jacob deceived him by clothing himself in his brother’s garments, and giving himself out as the latter. Isaac then said to him: “Come near now and kiss me, my son.” And he came near and kissed him, and he smelled the smell of his raiment, and blessed him, and said: “See the smell of my son is as the smell of a field which the Lord hath blessed.”

The sense of the smell peculiar to some one we are fond of is capable of exciting pleasure. Timkowski writes of a Mongol father that the latter time after time smelt his youngest son’s head. This mark of paternal tenderness serves with the Mongols instead of kisses. In the Philippine Islands, the sense of smell is so developed that the inhabitants, by simply sniffing at a pocket-handkerchief, can tell to whom it belongs; lovers who are separated send one another presents of bits of their linen, and, in their absence, keep each other in mind by often inhaling each other’s scent.

That the delicate perfume that exhales from a woman’s body plays an important part in love affairs even with modern civilised nationsis too well-known to require more than a passing mention on my part.

Certain races of mankind now actually salute each other by smelling; they apply their mouth and nose to a person’s cheek, and draw a long breath. In their language they do not say “Give me a kiss,” but “Smell me.” The same sort of kiss is also met with among the Burmese; and with many Malay tribes the words “smell” and “salute” are synonymous. Other races do not confine themselves to smelling each other’s faces, but sniff their hands at every salutation.

Alfred Grandidier, a French traveller, says of the nose-kiss in Madagascar: “It always excites the merriment of Europeans, and yet it has its origin in an extremely refined idea. The invisible air which is continually being breathed through the lips is to savages, not only, as with us, a sign of life, but it is also an emanation of the soul—its perfume, as they themselves say—and, when they mingle and suck in each other’s breath and odour, they think they are actually mingling their souls.”[30]

Then the origin of the nose-kiss, it seems, undoubtedly ought to be sought—at any ratepartly—in the sense of smell. The love of another human being involves, as a consequence, one’s loving everything belonging to this other being; and this love is shownin casuby drinking in his or her breath, whereby, little by little, a peculiar nose-salutation is very ingeniously developed, which, naturally, is capable of gradually assuming various conventional forms.

Now we will proceed to the kiss proper—that on the mouth. How can its origin be explained?[31]

It does not seem very rational to assume that the motion of the muscles in breathing should of itself be the natural, purely physical reflex of a feeling of love in the same way as, for instance, certain half-spasmodic contractions of several muscles in the upper part of the face can be the immediate expression of wrath.

I do not believe either that the mere contact of the lips with another person’s face was originally sufficient to express “I love you.”Naturally, the longing to touch the beloved ones body, to approach it as closely as possible, is a very essential manifestation of erotic emotion; but so far as the contact of the lips is concerned, there is reason for assuming that, originally, without its being the direct object, it had been, moreover, and perhaps in an equally high degree, a means of attaining a definite sensual gratification—a gratification that can be realised by the co-operation of the lips and mouth.

As the nose-salutation partly originates in smell, so the mouth salutation may, to a certain extent[32]at least, have its originin taste, or—which is even more probable—in both smell and taste? These latter, as you know, are very closely related to each other.

The dog shows his joy at his master’s presence by licking the latter’s hand. Why is this? It would not, I suppose, be too rash to assume that he as good as “tastes” him; loving his master, he therefore loves the taste and smell peculiar to him.

The cow licks her calf, and in this one may presumably see the expression of a feeling which is to some extent satisfied by this action. And why so? Undoubtedly by recognising by the tongue (and nose) the taste (and smell) peculiar to the calf.

Now, is it not exceedingly probable that the human kiss, in its original form, can, as to its passive element, be accounted for in an identical way, viz., as a purely sensual assimilation, by means of the nerves of taste and smell, of another person’s peculiar qualities with respect togustusandodor? These qualities have probably been much more conspicuous in primitive mankind than nowadays, just asit is quite certain that its faculty of taste and smell were far more developed than ours.

And have we not still, especially in the love-kiss, but also in kisses between women, very numerous representatives of the primitive kiss, which I should like to term the “taste-kiss.” I have many times pointed out, in the preceding pages, the part which taste plays in kissing; and I shall now add what I have often heard young girls say to a lady they had kissed amorously: “Your kisses taste so nice.”

From being a natural expression for love the sucking, tasting kiss has, in course of time, become reduced to nothing more than a simple inspiratory movement of the lips, which, by analogy, has come to express many other feelings, such as gratitude, admiration, compassion, tenderness, etc. It has become at length so degraded as to be used as a purely conventional salutation.

If this reasoning be correct, then the mouth-kiss, in the course of its development, presents a perfect parallel with the nose-kiss. Both these forms of greeting were originally closely allied, but the mouth-kiss had better conditions for development than the nose-kiss. It has become a salutation of a considerably highersort, and whenever savage tribes come into contact with civilised nations the nose-kiss is gradually discarded. Such, for instance, was the case in Madagascar. There is no doubt that savages can express very deep emotions by the nose-kiss. A French missionary tells the story of how he was received when he went back to the island of Pomotu: “When we approached the country all the population assembled on the beach. They had harpoons in their hands, for they imagined we were enemies; but, as soon as they saw my cassock, they shouted, ‘That’s the Father, away with the harpoons,’ and when we reached the shore they all rushed forward to kiss me by rubbing their noses against mine, according to the custom of that country. The ceremony was not very agreeable to me, and I was not altogether pleased at having to take part in it.”[33]Civilised people, on the other hand, regard the nose-kiss as something highly ludicrous, and I doubt if any poet has the power of casting a halo of romance over it.

The mouth-kiss, on the contrary, is redolent of the purest and most delicate poesy. A German minnesinger rhapsodisesthus: “The radiant sun is darkened before mine eyes when I behold the roses that bloom on my darling’s mouth.”

“He who can pluck these roses may rejoice in the depth of his heart. Many are the roses I have beheld, but never have I looked on any so splendid.”

“How beauteous are the roses one gathers in the valley; nathless her delicate, ruddy lips conjure up thousands that are lovelier still.”

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