CHAP. XII.
My new master’s name was Mr. Horken. He was a tolerably good man, so far as whipping was concerned; but fed his slaves most miserably, giving them meat only once each month.
At the plantation where I lived two years previously, I became acquainted with three slaves, who had now determined to make an effort to gain their freedom, by starting for the free States. They came down to see me, and try to induce me to go with them, they intending to start in about three weeks; but they exacted from me a promise of secrecy in regard to the whole matter. I had not as yet fully made up my mind to make an attempt for my freedom, therefore did not give a positive promise to accompany them. I had known several, who, having made the attempt, had failed, been brought back, whipped, and then sold far to the South. Such considerations somewhat discouraged me from making the attempt.
As the time drew near for them to start, they came again to know my decision. I told them that I had consulted my mother, whose fears for my success were so great, that she had persuaded me not to go. These three friends were very religious persons, one of them being aMethodist preacher. He, in particular, urged me very strongly to accompany them, saying that he had full confidence in the surety of the promises of God, who had said that heaven and earth should pass away, before one jot of his word should fail; that he had often tried God, and never knew him to fail; consequently he believed he was able to carry him safely to the land of freedom, and accordingly he was determined to go. Still I was afraid to risk myself on such uncertain promises; I dared not trust an unseen God.
This visit to me was on Sunday, and they had planned to start the Saturday night following, and travel the next Sunday and Monday. It was not uncommon for slaves to go away on Saturday and not return until the following Tuesday, feigning sickness as an excuse, though this pretence not unfrequently subjected them to a flogging. So that very little alarm was felt for a slave’s absence until Wednesday, unless his previous conduct had excited suspicion.
On the night on which they intended to start, accompanied by several of their fellow slaves, they repaired to an open lot of ground. Others, prompted by curiosity, followed, until quite a large concourse was assembled. Here they knelt in prayer to the great God of Heaven and Earth, invoking Him to guard them through every troublesome scene of this life, and go with them to their journey’s end. Afterwards they sang a parting hymn, bidding their companions no other farewell, the hymn being exactly appropriate to the occasion. It was one of the old camp-meeting songs:—
“Farewell my dear brethren, I bid you farewell!I am going to travel the way to excel;I am going to travel the wilderness through,Therefore, my dear brethren, I bid you adieu!The thought of our parting doth cause me to grieve,So well do I love you; still you I must leave;Though we live at a distance, and you I no more see,On the banks of old Canaan united we will be.”
“Farewell my dear brethren, I bid you farewell!I am going to travel the way to excel;I am going to travel the wilderness through,Therefore, my dear brethren, I bid you adieu!The thought of our parting doth cause me to grieve,So well do I love you; still you I must leave;Though we live at a distance, and you I no more see,On the banks of old Canaan united we will be.”
“Farewell my dear brethren, I bid you farewell!I am going to travel the way to excel;I am going to travel the wilderness through,Therefore, my dear brethren, I bid you adieu!
“Farewell my dear brethren, I bid you farewell!
I am going to travel the way to excel;
I am going to travel the wilderness through,
Therefore, my dear brethren, I bid you adieu!
The thought of our parting doth cause me to grieve,So well do I love you; still you I must leave;Though we live at a distance, and you I no more see,On the banks of old Canaan united we will be.”
The thought of our parting doth cause me to grieve,
So well do I love you; still you I must leave;
Though we live at a distance, and you I no more see,
On the banks of old Canaan united we will be.”
I well remember the evening of their departure. It was a beautiful night, the moon poured a flood of silver light, and the stars shone brilliantly upon their pathway, seeming like witness of God’s presence, and an encouragement that he would guide them to their journey’s end.
After they had gone, I began to regret that I had so much distrusted God, and had not accompanied them, and these regrets weighed so heavily upon my mind, that I could not rest day or night.
Wednesday came, and with it uproar and confusion, for three slaves were missing, of whom no one could give any account. Search was instantly made, which was, of course, unavailing, since they were already safe in some free State. Who would have thought that those contented negroes would have left their masters, preferring freedom to slavery? But they are in Canada.
Some time after this, master Richard concluded to sell his plantation, and with his slaves remove to Mississippi, my mistress consenting that he might take hers also. So he, one day, told me that I could have my choice, go with him or be sold. I told him I would not leave him to go to any one else in the known world. He then said thathe would hire me out the next year, upon conditions that my employer should release me to him whenever he called for me. So when my year with Mr. Horken was up, I was hired to Dr. Johns upon the above conditions.
It was rumored about that I had given the three escaped slaves passes, it being known that I could write a tolerable hand. But master Richard looked into the affair, and finding no evidence against me, the subject was dismissed.
I lived with Dr. Johns from the commencement of the year, until the middle of June. About this time two more slaves attempted to escape, but were overtaken, caught, and brought back. It was said they had passes, but of the truth of this I am not sure, as the slaveholders reported many stories to implicate me in guilt. But God fought my battle.
To make matters appear still more in my disfavor, one slave, whom I never knew, told his master that I was going to run away, and had been trying to persuade him to go; that my master was going to remove me South, but that I intended to leave for the free States.
These were facts; but how this slave came by them I never knew, as I had only confided them to one man, and he came off with me. I left home on Saturday night, and on Sunday several slaves were arrested and put in irons, suspected of intentions of trying to escape with me. I was about three miles from home, and knew nothing of all this, though they were hunting for me.
I felt very melancholy all day Sunday, yet knew not the cause. Early Monday morning, the constables wereat Dr. Johns’, waiting my arrival, to take me; but I did not go home that morning, nor have I ever since been there. Still, it was my intention to have gone, but God overruled that intention by a better.
I started early on Monday to return to the doctor’s, and got within a mile of that place, to a fork of the roads, when suddenly my steps were arrested, and a voice seemed to say, don’t go any farther in that direction. I stopped, considered a moment, and concluded that it was mere fancy or conceit. So I started on again; but the same feelings returned with redoubled force.
What can all this mean? I queried within myself; these sensations so strange and unusual; yet so strong and irresistible? It was God, warning me to avoid danger by not going home. So I turned upon my footsteps, and immediately these feelings left me. I sat down by the side of the road to reason upon the matter, when, for the first time, I felt an entire confidence in God, and prayed in faith.
I now made a third attempt to go home. But upon reaching the same spot, I was more uncontrollably effected than before. I became nearly blind, my head swam, and I could scarcely stand. I now felt satisfied that it was the working of an unseen God, and really think that had I still persisted in my attempts to go forward in that direction, I should have fallen as one dead, in the road.
I therefore went into the woods and stayed until night, when I went to a neighboring slave’s quarters, where I got something to eat. After this, I started for Mr. Morton’s plantation, where Uncle Harry’s wife lived, andwhich was near Dr. Johns’. Harry was a carpenter, and was at work for the doctor, therefore I knew that I could learn through him the whole state of affairs there, as he came home to stay nights.
As soon as I entered the house, Uncle Harry exclaimed, “John, what have you been doing?” “Nothing,” I answered. He then said, “the whole plantation, at the doctor’s, is in an uproar about you, as they say you have been giving passes to slaves, to help them run away, which you also intend to do yourself; and, accordingly, the constables have been on the watch for you these two days. I saw your old mother to-day, who was running from one road to the other, to meet you, to prevent your coming home, lest they should catch you. Now I don’t know what you will do, as they have advertised you, offering three hundred dollars for your arrest; so the patrollers will be looking for you; consequently you had better not stop here long. I promised your mother to try and see you to-night.”
He told his wife to give me something to eat, but told me it would not be safe for me to stay there to eat it. I moved slowly away, but he hastened my footsteps, as did the angel those of good old Lot, for surely danger was at my heels.
Now my morning’s feelings were fully explained. I knew it was the hand of God, working in my behalf; it was his voice warning me to escape from the danger towards which I was hastening. Who would not praise such a God? Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised.
I felt renewed confidence and faith, for I believed that God was in my favor, and now was the time to test the matter. About two rods from Uncle Harry’s house I fell upon my knees, and with hands uplifted to high heaven, related all the late circumstances to the Great King, saying that the whole world was against me without a cause, besought his protection, and solemnly promised to serve him all the days of my life. I received a spiritual answer of approval; a voice like thunder seeming to enter my soul, saying, I am your God and am with you; though the whole world be against you, I am more than the world; though wicked men hunt you, trust in me, for I am the Rock of your Defence.
Had my pursuers then been near, they must have heard me, for I praised God at the top of my voice. I was determined to take him at his word, and risk the consequences.
I retired to my hiding place in the woods until the next night, when I returned to Uncle Harry’s, that I might see or hear from my mother. I found her there waiting for me. She had brought food in her pocket for me.
I inquired if the patrollers had been there in search of me, and was told that they had not as yet, but would, doubtless, be there that night.
My mother appeared almost heart-broken. She did not wish me to go away, and had been to master Richard about me, who had promised to inquire into the accusations against me, and if there was not sufficient proof to substantiate them, they could not injure me. But he recommendedthat I should keep out of sight for the present, and if he could do nothing else in my favor, he would so manage, that when he was ready to go South, I could be got off with him. I thought this a very wise plan too, in case I desired to go South; but I had fully resolved to go North.
I did not, however, communicate this resolution to mother, as I saw she was not in a proper condition to receive it. She promised to go again to master Richard, and come and let me know the result of her visit. But I knew I should never again see her, and that I was then probably taking my last look of her—this side the grave.
Upon leaving me, she took my hand, and in a voice choked by sobs, gave me her parting blessing. My heart was so full that I could scarcely endure this, and but for the support of God, I must have fainted. I now returned to my hiding place, leaving word with Uncle Harry, where the friend who had promised to come away with me, might find me.
As soon as he heard he came directly to see me, for he had been anxious lest I should go off without him.