Chapter 126

A Woman’s Vengeance.I thank[1292]you for your sympathy,But help! No,[1293]there is none for me.For what I’ve done I feel no stingOf penitence, nor can time bringOne pang of sorrow. You may thinkMe hard, unfeeling, and may shrink[1294]From me with loathing when I say,I’m glad my bullet found the wayInto his heart; and I would doThe same again, and glory,[1295]too,In having done it. Penalty!For what they now may do with meI care but little.[1296]He is dead,And that ends all.What made me do the deed? The old,Old[1297]time-worn story of man’s coldAnd heartless cruelty; of wrongsHeaped on her head,[1298]to whom belongsAt least respect,[1299]if nothing more.I met him—him, my husband—justFive years ago. My God! what trustI placed in his fair words, so soft,So sweet, so full of love. But love is blind,And I was madly so. The first two yearsWere full[1300]of joy—joy without tears.My life was of peaceful love.But, ah! the change came sudden, fast;My summer sun was overcast.[1301]The godlike being that I thoughtOf all mankind[1302]most perfect wrought,Tore off[1303]the mask that hid his face,And, to my horror,[1304]in his placeRevealed a demon,[1305]blackest-hued,Remorseless, pitiless, imbuedWith all the wickedness that heartCan hold, or shameless sin[1306]impartThe loving words to curses[1307]turned;My fond advances all were spurned.[1308]I soon became for him a thingTo tread upon—a clod to fling[1309]From out his path. I took my childAnd fled[1310]one night, half maddened, wild,Far from his sight—I cared not whereSo I again his face might ne’erBehold. But soon once more with wordsThat seemed to me like songs of birds[1311]He sought me out, and with eyesFilled with repentant tears, imploredForgiveness; and I—fool![1312]ignored[1313]The past, forgot my woes, and wentBack to his home with heart content.O Heaven![1314]could I have but foreseen,Could I have known he did not meanTo keep the vows so freely made!Once more his promises were castAside,[1315]as idle words, and worseThan e’en before—a daily curse[1316]My life became.Then came at last the final blow—The worst that love can contemplate,And which can turn that love to hate.[1317]One night, when he had gone from me,I found a letter which he carelesslyHad overlooked. The script[1318]was smallAnd neat—a woman’s hand! A wallOf fire outstretched[1319]before my eyes;A nameless horror seemed to rise.No, no! this could not be. He mightBe bad, be dead to sense of right,But false! O Heaven![1320]The dreadful thoughtSurged in my brain.[1321]I crushed[1322]it, fought[1323]It down with frenzied eagerness.The note was open; chilled, nerveless,I drew it[1324]from its fold and read,[1325]“This night to meet him,” so it said.This night! how throbbed[1326]my aching head!Her house it gave—the place, the hour—I seemed renewed with sudden power.He[1327]would be there, and so would I.[1328]I cast[1329]the hated letter by;My child from off the floor I clasped,And from the bureau drawer I graspedA loaded pistol that would rightMy wrong. So out[1330]into the night,Into the raging storm, I fled,My babe clasped[1331]in my arms.I could but repeat,“False! false! I’ll be revenged!”[1332]My soulNow stirred and roused beyond control,Was filled with one desire alone,And that was that he should atone[1333]For this—to woman—foulest[1334]wrong.So through the night I sped alongUntil I reached her house.And then I heard[1335]A voice within—his voice! Each wordIn sweet and loving tenderness,And accents thatmy[1336]heart should blessWere lavished onher[1337]listening ears.I listened, listened,[1338]all unseen,Until I thought I should go wild.[1339]Then, with a desperate hand, flung wide[1340]The casement. With a bound, besideThe two[1341]I stood. She started—screamed;He turned[1342]and saw me, and then seemedA moment as if turned to stone;And as his baseness I made known,She—poor thing—with a long, low cry,Sank[1343]to the floor despairingly.Then, like a fiend let loose from hell,He toward[1344]me leaped with one fierce yell,And grasping[1345]quick a heavy chairCried, “Curse you!” whirled it high[1346]in air.I sprang aside[1347]in sudden dread;The blow fell full upon the headOf my sweet child, that lifeless droppedBack in my arms. My heart throbs[1348]stopped;A red mist swam[1349]before my sight;I could not scream, try as I might.I grasped the pistol[1350]from my breast,And then I killed[1351]him!All the restFor days to me was blank;[1352]and when—O Heaven! why did I not die then?At last my sense came back. I wouldHave taken my own life if I could.But it perhaps was better[1353]so;God will not judge me hard, I know.And when, in answer to His call,I stand within the heavenly hall,[1354]And the Blessed OneSays, “Why hast thou transgressed my laws?”My babe shall plead its mother’s[1355]cause.—Thomas F. Wilford.Gestures.[1292]Bow head.[1293]V. Con.[1294]B. V. to right.[1295]A. O.[1296]Shrug shoulders.[1297]H. B.[1298]P. H. O.[1299]H. O.[1300]B. H. O.[1301]V. A. O.[1302]B. H. O.[1303]V. Sp.[1304]B. V. to R.[1305]Ind. D. O.[1306]P. D. O.[1307]Cli. D.[1308]V. H. O.[1309]Left D. Sw.[1310]H. L.[1311]A. O.[1312]B. Cli. D.[1313]V. H. O.[1314]Clasp hands.[1315]V. H. L.[1316]B. Cli. D.[1317]P. D. O.[1318]Look in left hand.[1319]V. H. Sw.[1320]Clasp to breast.[1321]To head.[1322]B. P. D.[1323]B. Cli. D.[1324]Sp.[1325]Trace on left hand.[1326]Hand to head.[1327]H. O.[1328]To self.[1329]Left Sp.[1330]H. F.[1331]B. Sp.[1332]Cli. raised.[1333]D. F.[1334]B. Cli. D.[1335]Lis.[1336]To self.[1337]H. O.[1338]Lean to R. and raise hand.[1339]To head.[1340]B. V. Sp.[1341]H. F.[1342]Look to left.[1343]B. D. F.[1344]Left H. O.[1345]-[1346]B. Sp.[1347]Start back.[1348]R. hand to heart.[1349]Left V. Sw.[1350]Sp.[1351]Ind. H. F.[1352]B. V. H. F.[1353]B. H. O.[1354]A. O.[1355]To self.

I thank[1292]you for your sympathy,But help! No,[1293]there is none for me.For what I’ve done I feel no stingOf penitence, nor can time bringOne pang of sorrow. You may thinkMe hard, unfeeling, and may shrink[1294]From me with loathing when I say,I’m glad my bullet found the wayInto his heart; and I would doThe same again, and glory,[1295]too,In having done it. Penalty!For what they now may do with meI care but little.[1296]He is dead,And that ends all.What made me do the deed? The old,Old[1297]time-worn story of man’s coldAnd heartless cruelty; of wrongsHeaped on her head,[1298]to whom belongsAt least respect,[1299]if nothing more.I met him—him, my husband—justFive years ago. My God! what trustI placed in his fair words, so soft,So sweet, so full of love. But love is blind,And I was madly so. The first two yearsWere full[1300]of joy—joy without tears.My life was of peaceful love.But, ah! the change came sudden, fast;My summer sun was overcast.[1301]The godlike being that I thoughtOf all mankind[1302]most perfect wrought,Tore off[1303]the mask that hid his face,And, to my horror,[1304]in his placeRevealed a demon,[1305]blackest-hued,Remorseless, pitiless, imbuedWith all the wickedness that heartCan hold, or shameless sin[1306]impartThe loving words to curses[1307]turned;My fond advances all were spurned.[1308]I soon became for him a thingTo tread upon—a clod to fling[1309]From out his path. I took my childAnd fled[1310]one night, half maddened, wild,Far from his sight—I cared not whereSo I again his face might ne’erBehold. But soon once more with wordsThat seemed to me like songs of birds[1311]He sought me out, and with eyesFilled with repentant tears, imploredForgiveness; and I—fool![1312]ignored[1313]The past, forgot my woes, and wentBack to his home with heart content.O Heaven![1314]could I have but foreseen,Could I have known he did not meanTo keep the vows so freely made!Once more his promises were castAside,[1315]as idle words, and worseThan e’en before—a daily curse[1316]My life became.Then came at last the final blow—The worst that love can contemplate,And which can turn that love to hate.[1317]One night, when he had gone from me,I found a letter which he carelesslyHad overlooked. The script[1318]was smallAnd neat—a woman’s hand! A wallOf fire outstretched[1319]before my eyes;A nameless horror seemed to rise.No, no! this could not be. He mightBe bad, be dead to sense of right,But false! O Heaven![1320]The dreadful thoughtSurged in my brain.[1321]I crushed[1322]it, fought[1323]It down with frenzied eagerness.The note was open; chilled, nerveless,I drew it[1324]from its fold and read,[1325]“This night to meet him,” so it said.This night! how throbbed[1326]my aching head!Her house it gave—the place, the hour—I seemed renewed with sudden power.He[1327]would be there, and so would I.[1328]I cast[1329]the hated letter by;My child from off the floor I clasped,And from the bureau drawer I graspedA loaded pistol that would rightMy wrong. So out[1330]into the night,Into the raging storm, I fled,My babe clasped[1331]in my arms.I could but repeat,“False! false! I’ll be revenged!”[1332]My soulNow stirred and roused beyond control,Was filled with one desire alone,And that was that he should atone[1333]For this—to woman—foulest[1334]wrong.So through the night I sped alongUntil I reached her house.And then I heard[1335]A voice within—his voice! Each wordIn sweet and loving tenderness,And accents thatmy[1336]heart should blessWere lavished onher[1337]listening ears.I listened, listened,[1338]all unseen,Until I thought I should go wild.[1339]Then, with a desperate hand, flung wide[1340]The casement. With a bound, besideThe two[1341]I stood. She started—screamed;He turned[1342]and saw me, and then seemedA moment as if turned to stone;And as his baseness I made known,She—poor thing—with a long, low cry,Sank[1343]to the floor despairingly.Then, like a fiend let loose from hell,He toward[1344]me leaped with one fierce yell,And grasping[1345]quick a heavy chairCried, “Curse you!” whirled it high[1346]in air.I sprang aside[1347]in sudden dread;The blow fell full upon the headOf my sweet child, that lifeless droppedBack in my arms. My heart throbs[1348]stopped;A red mist swam[1349]before my sight;I could not scream, try as I might.I grasped the pistol[1350]from my breast,And then I killed[1351]him!All the restFor days to me was blank;[1352]and when—O Heaven! why did I not die then?At last my sense came back. I wouldHave taken my own life if I could.But it perhaps was better[1353]so;God will not judge me hard, I know.And when, in answer to His call,I stand within the heavenly hall,[1354]And the Blessed OneSays, “Why hast thou transgressed my laws?”My babe shall plead its mother’s[1355]cause.—Thomas F. Wilford.

I thank[1292]you for your sympathy,But help! No,[1293]there is none for me.For what I’ve done I feel no stingOf penitence, nor can time bringOne pang of sorrow. You may thinkMe hard, unfeeling, and may shrink[1294]From me with loathing when I say,I’m glad my bullet found the wayInto his heart; and I would doThe same again, and glory,[1295]too,In having done it. Penalty!For what they now may do with meI care but little.[1296]He is dead,And that ends all.What made me do the deed? The old,Old[1297]time-worn story of man’s coldAnd heartless cruelty; of wrongsHeaped on her head,[1298]to whom belongsAt least respect,[1299]if nothing more.I met him—him, my husband—justFive years ago. My God! what trustI placed in his fair words, so soft,So sweet, so full of love. But love is blind,And I was madly so. The first two yearsWere full[1300]of joy—joy without tears.My life was of peaceful love.But, ah! the change came sudden, fast;My summer sun was overcast.[1301]The godlike being that I thoughtOf all mankind[1302]most perfect wrought,Tore off[1303]the mask that hid his face,And, to my horror,[1304]in his placeRevealed a demon,[1305]blackest-hued,Remorseless, pitiless, imbuedWith all the wickedness that heartCan hold, or shameless sin[1306]impartThe loving words to curses[1307]turned;My fond advances all were spurned.[1308]I soon became for him a thingTo tread upon—a clod to fling[1309]From out his path. I took my childAnd fled[1310]one night, half maddened, wild,Far from his sight—I cared not whereSo I again his face might ne’erBehold. But soon once more with wordsThat seemed to me like songs of birds[1311]He sought me out, and with eyesFilled with repentant tears, imploredForgiveness; and I—fool![1312]ignored[1313]The past, forgot my woes, and wentBack to his home with heart content.O Heaven![1314]could I have but foreseen,Could I have known he did not meanTo keep the vows so freely made!Once more his promises were castAside,[1315]as idle words, and worseThan e’en before—a daily curse[1316]My life became.Then came at last the final blow—The worst that love can contemplate,And which can turn that love to hate.[1317]One night, when he had gone from me,I found a letter which he carelesslyHad overlooked. The script[1318]was smallAnd neat—a woman’s hand! A wallOf fire outstretched[1319]before my eyes;A nameless horror seemed to rise.No, no! this could not be. He mightBe bad, be dead to sense of right,But false! O Heaven![1320]The dreadful thoughtSurged in my brain.[1321]I crushed[1322]it, fought[1323]It down with frenzied eagerness.The note was open; chilled, nerveless,I drew it[1324]from its fold and read,[1325]“This night to meet him,” so it said.This night! how throbbed[1326]my aching head!Her house it gave—the place, the hour—I seemed renewed with sudden power.He[1327]would be there, and so would I.[1328]I cast[1329]the hated letter by;My child from off the floor I clasped,And from the bureau drawer I graspedA loaded pistol that would rightMy wrong. So out[1330]into the night,Into the raging storm, I fled,My babe clasped[1331]in my arms.I could but repeat,“False! false! I’ll be revenged!”[1332]My soulNow stirred and roused beyond control,Was filled with one desire alone,And that was that he should atone[1333]For this—to woman—foulest[1334]wrong.So through the night I sped alongUntil I reached her house.And then I heard[1335]A voice within—his voice! Each wordIn sweet and loving tenderness,And accents thatmy[1336]heart should blessWere lavished onher[1337]listening ears.I listened, listened,[1338]all unseen,Until I thought I should go wild.[1339]Then, with a desperate hand, flung wide[1340]The casement. With a bound, besideThe two[1341]I stood. She started—screamed;He turned[1342]and saw me, and then seemedA moment as if turned to stone;And as his baseness I made known,She—poor thing—with a long, low cry,Sank[1343]to the floor despairingly.Then, like a fiend let loose from hell,He toward[1344]me leaped with one fierce yell,And grasping[1345]quick a heavy chairCried, “Curse you!” whirled it high[1346]in air.I sprang aside[1347]in sudden dread;The blow fell full upon the headOf my sweet child, that lifeless droppedBack in my arms. My heart throbs[1348]stopped;A red mist swam[1349]before my sight;I could not scream, try as I might.I grasped the pistol[1350]from my breast,And then I killed[1351]him!All the restFor days to me was blank;[1352]and when—O Heaven! why did I not die then?At last my sense came back. I wouldHave taken my own life if I could.But it perhaps was better[1353]so;God will not judge me hard, I know.And when, in answer to His call,I stand within the heavenly hall,[1354]And the Blessed OneSays, “Why hast thou transgressed my laws?”My babe shall plead its mother’s[1355]cause.—Thomas F. Wilford.

I thank[1292]you for your sympathy,

But help! No,[1293]there is none for me.

For what I’ve done I feel no sting

Of penitence, nor can time bring

One pang of sorrow. You may think

Me hard, unfeeling, and may shrink[1294]

From me with loathing when I say,

I’m glad my bullet found the way

Into his heart; and I would do

The same again, and glory,[1295]too,

In having done it. Penalty!

For what they now may do with me

I care but little.[1296]He is dead,

And that ends all.

What made me do the deed? The old,

Old[1297]time-worn story of man’s cold

And heartless cruelty; of wrongs

Heaped on her head,[1298]to whom belongs

At least respect,[1299]if nothing more.

I met him—him, my husband—just

Five years ago. My God! what trust

I placed in his fair words, so soft,

So sweet, so full of love. But love is blind,

And I was madly so. The first two years

Were full[1300]of joy—joy without tears.

My life was of peaceful love.

But, ah! the change came sudden, fast;

My summer sun was overcast.[1301]

The godlike being that I thought

Of all mankind[1302]most perfect wrought,

Tore off[1303]the mask that hid his face,

And, to my horror,[1304]in his place

Revealed a demon,[1305]blackest-hued,

Remorseless, pitiless, imbued

With all the wickedness that heart

Can hold, or shameless sin[1306]impart

The loving words to curses[1307]turned;

My fond advances all were spurned.[1308]

I soon became for him a thing

To tread upon—a clod to fling[1309]

From out his path. I took my child

And fled[1310]one night, half maddened, wild,

Far from his sight—I cared not where

So I again his face might ne’er

Behold. But soon once more with words

That seemed to me like songs of birds[1311]

He sought me out, and with eyes

Filled with repentant tears, implored

Forgiveness; and I—fool![1312]ignored[1313]

The past, forgot my woes, and went

Back to his home with heart content.

O Heaven![1314]could I have but foreseen,

Could I have known he did not mean

To keep the vows so freely made!

Once more his promises were cast

Aside,[1315]as idle words, and worse

Than e’en before—a daily curse[1316]

My life became.

Then came at last the final blow—

The worst that love can contemplate,

And which can turn that love to hate.[1317]

One night, when he had gone from me,

I found a letter which he carelessly

Had overlooked. The script[1318]was small

And neat—a woman’s hand! A wall

Of fire outstretched[1319]before my eyes;

A nameless horror seemed to rise.

No, no! this could not be. He might

Be bad, be dead to sense of right,

But false! O Heaven![1320]The dreadful thought

Surged in my brain.[1321]I crushed[1322]it, fought[1323]

It down with frenzied eagerness.

The note was open; chilled, nerveless,

I drew it[1324]from its fold and read,

[1325]“This night to meet him,” so it said.

This night! how throbbed[1326]my aching head!

Her house it gave—the place, the hour—

I seemed renewed with sudden power.

He[1327]would be there, and so would I.[1328]

I cast[1329]the hated letter by;

My child from off the floor I clasped,

And from the bureau drawer I grasped

A loaded pistol that would right

My wrong. So out[1330]into the night,

Into the raging storm, I fled,

My babe clasped[1331]in my arms.

I could but repeat,

“False! false! I’ll be revenged!”[1332]My soul

Now stirred and roused beyond control,

Was filled with one desire alone,

And that was that he should atone[1333]

For this—to woman—foulest[1334]wrong.

So through the night I sped along

Until I reached her house.

And then I heard[1335]

A voice within—his voice! Each word

In sweet and loving tenderness,

And accents thatmy[1336]heart should bless

Were lavished onher[1337]listening ears.

I listened, listened,[1338]all unseen,

Until I thought I should go wild.[1339]

Then, with a desperate hand, flung wide[1340]

The casement. With a bound, beside

The two[1341]I stood. She started—screamed;

He turned[1342]and saw me, and then seemed

A moment as if turned to stone;

And as his baseness I made known,

She—poor thing—with a long, low cry,

Sank[1343]to the floor despairingly.

Then, like a fiend let loose from hell,

He toward[1344]me leaped with one fierce yell,

And grasping[1345]quick a heavy chair

Cried, “Curse you!” whirled it high[1346]in air.

I sprang aside[1347]in sudden dread;

The blow fell full upon the head

Of my sweet child, that lifeless dropped

Back in my arms. My heart throbs[1348]stopped;

A red mist swam[1349]before my sight;

I could not scream, try as I might.

I grasped the pistol[1350]from my breast,

And then I killed[1351]him!All the rest

For days to me was blank;[1352]and when—

O Heaven! why did I not die then?

At last my sense came back. I would

Have taken my own life if I could.

But it perhaps was better[1353]so;

God will not judge me hard, I know.

And when, in answer to His call,

I stand within the heavenly hall,[1354]

And the Blessed One

Says, “Why hast thou transgressed my laws?”

My babe shall plead its mother’s[1355]cause.

—Thomas F. Wilford.

Gestures.


Back to IndexNext