CHAPTER II.

[Reader."Sturm?"Author."Stone, stupid; The BlowingStone."]

[Reader."Sturm?"

Author."Stone, stupid; The BlowingStone."]

"And of your house? I can't make out the sign."

"BlawingStwun, sir," says the landlord, pouring out his old ale from a Toby Philpot jug,[66]with a melodious crash, into the long-necked glass.

"What queer names!" say we, sighing at the end of our draught, and holding out the glass to be replenished.

"Bean't queer at all, as I can see, sir," says mine host, handing back our glass, "seeing that this here is the Blawing Stwun itself"; putting his hand on a square lump of stone, some three feet and a half high, perforated with two or three queer holes, like petrified antediluvian[67]rat-holes, which lies there close under the oak, under our very nose. We are more than ever puzzled, and drink our second glass of ale, wondering what will come next."Like to hear un,[68]sir?" says mine host, setting down Toby Philpot on the tray, and resting both hands on the "Stwun." We are ready for anything; and he, without waiting for a reply, applies his mouth to one of the rat-holes. Something must come of it, if he doesn't burst. Good heavens! I hope he has no apoplectic tendencies. Yes, here it comes, sure enough, a grewsome[69]sound between a moan and a roar, and spreads itself away over the valley, and up the hill-side, and into the woods at the back of the house, a ghost-like awful voice. "Um[70]do say, sir," says mine host, rising, purple-faced, while the moan is still coming out of the Stwun, "as they used in old times to warn the country-side, by blawing the Stwun when the enemy was a comin'—and as how folks could make un heered then for seven mile round; leastways, so I've heerd lawyer Smith say, and he knows a smart sight about them old times." We can hardly swallow lawyer Smith's seven miles, but could the blowing of the stone have been a summons, a sort of sending the fiery cross[71]round the neighborhood in the old times? What old times? Who knows? We pay for our beer, and are thankful.

"And what's the name of the village just below, landlord?"

"Kingstone Lisle, sir."

"Fine plantations[72]you've got here."

"Yes, sir, the Squire's[73]'mazin' fond of trees and such like."

"No wonder. He's got some real beauties to be fond of. Good-day, landlord."

"Good-day, sir, and a pleasant ride to 'e."[74]

And now, my boys, you whom I want to get for readers, have you had enough? Will you give in at once, and say you're convinced, and let me begin my story or will you have some more of it? Remember, I've only been over a little bit of the hill-side yet, what you could ride round easily on your ponies in an hour. I'm only just come down into the vale, by Blowing Stone Hill, and if I once begin about the vale, what's to stop me? You'll have to hear all about Wantage, the birthplace of Alfred, and Farringdon, which held out so long for Charles I. (the vale was near Oxford, and dreadfully malignant;[75]full of Throgmortons, Puseys, and Pyes, and such like, and their brawny retainers). Did you ever read Thomas Ingoldsby's "Legend of Hamilton Tighe"?[76]If you haven't, you ought to have. Well, Farringdon is where he lived, before he went to sea; his real name was Hampden Pye, and the Pyes were the great folk at Farringdon. Then there's Pusey. You've heard of the Pusey horn,[77]whichKing Canute gave to the Puseys of that day, and which the gallant old squire, lately gone to his rest (whom Berkshire freeholders[78]turned out of last Parliament, to their eternal disgrace, for voting according to his conscience), used to bring out on high days, holidays, and bonfire nights. And the splendid old Cross church at Uffington, the Uffingas town; how the whole country-side teems with Saxon names and memories! And the old moated grange[79]at Compton, nestled close under the hill-side, where twenty Marianas[80]may have lived, with its bright water-lilies in the moat, and its yew walk "the cloister walk," and its peerless terraced gardens. There they all are, and twenty things besides, for those who care about them, and have eyes. And these are the sort of things you may find, I believe, every one of you, in any common English country neighborhood.

Will you look for them under your own noses, or will you not? Well, well, I've done what I can to make you, and if you will go gadding over half Europe now every holiday, I can't help it. I was born and bred a west-countryman,[81]thank God! a Wessex man, a citizen of the noblest Saxon kingdom of Wessex, a regular "Angular Saxon,"[82]the very soul of me "adscriptus glebæ."[83]There's nothing like the old country-side for me, and no music like the twang of the real old Saxon tongue, as one getsit fresh from the veritable chaw[84]in the White Horse Vale; and I say with "Gaarge Ridler," the old west-country yeoman,

"Throo aall the waarld owld Gaarge would bwoast,Commend me to merry owld England mwoast;While vools[85]gwoes prating vur and nigh,We stwops at whum,[86]my dog and I."[A]

[A]For this old song see Hughes's "Scouring of the White Horse."

Here at any rate lived and stopped at home Squire Brown, J. P.[87]for the county of Berks, in a village near the foot of the White Horse range. And here he dealt out justice and mercy in a rough way, and brought up sons and daughters, and hunted the fox, and grumbled at the badness of the roads and the times. And his wife dealt out stockings, and calico[88]shirts, and smock frocks,[89]and comforting drinks to the old folks with the "rheumatiz," and good counsel to all; and kept the coal and clothes clubs going, for Yule-tide,[90]when the bands of mummers[91]came round dressed out in ribbons and colored paper caps, and stamped round the Squire's kitchen, repeating in true sing-song vernacular[92]the legend of St. Georgeand his fight, and the ten-pound doctor,[93]who plays his part at healing the Saint—a relic, I believe, of the old middle-age mysteries.[94]It was the first dramatic representation which greeted the eyes of little Tom, who was brought down into the kitchen by his nurse to witness it, at the mature age of three years. Tom was the eldest child of his parents, and from his earliest babyhood exhibited the family characteristics in great strength. He was a hearty, strong boy from the first, given to fighting with and escaping from his nurse, and fraternizing with all the village boys, with whom he made expeditions all round the neighborhood. And here in the quiet, old-fashioned country village, under the shadow of the everlasting hills, Tom Brown was reared, and never left it till he went first to school when nearly eight years of age, for in those days change of air twice a year was not thought absolutely necessary for the health of all her majesty's lieges.[95]

I have been credibly informed, and am inclined to believe, that the various Boards of Directors of Railway Companies, those gigantic jobbers[96]and bribers, while quarrelling about everything else, agreed together some ten years back to buy up the learned profession of medicine, body and soul. To this end they set apart several millions of money, which they continually distribute judiciously among the doctors, stipulating only this one thing, that they shall prescribe change of air to every patient who can pay, or borrow money to pay, a railway fare, and see theirprescription carried out. If it be not for this, why is it that none of us can be well at home for a year together? It wasn't so twenty years ago,—not a bit of it. The Browns didn't go out of the county once in five years. A visit to Reading or Abingdon twice a year, at Assizes or Quarter Sessions[97]which the Squire made on his horse, with a pair of saddle-bags containing his wardrobe—a stay of a day or two at some country neighbor's—or an expedition to a county ball or the yeomanry review—[98]made up the sum of the Brown locomotion in most years. A stray Brown from some distant county dropped in every now and then; or from Oxford, on grave nag, an old don[99]contemporary of the Squire; and were looked upon by the Brown household and the villagers with the same sort of feeling with which we now regard a man who has crossed the Rocky Mountains, or launched a boat on the great lake in Central Africa. The White Horse Vale, remember, was traversed by no great road; nothing but country parish roads, and these very bad. Only one coach ran there, and this one only from Wantage to London, so that the western part of the vale was without regular means of moving on, and certainly didn't seem to want them. There was the canal, by the way, which supplied the country-side with coal, and up and down which continually went the long barges with the big black men lounging by the side of the horses along the towing-path, and the women in bright-colored handkerchiefs standing in the sterns steering. Standing, I say, but you could never see whether they were standing or sitting, all but their headsand shoulders being out of sight in the cozy little cabins which occupied some eight feet of the stern and which Tom Brown pictured to himself as the most desirable of residences. His nurse told him that those good-natured-looking women were in the constant habit of enticing children into the barges and taking them up to London and selling them, which Tom wouldn't believe, and which made him resolve as soon as possible to accept the oft-proffered invitation of these sirens[100]to "young master," to come in and have a ride. But as yet the nurse was too much for Tom.

Yet why should I, after all, abuse the gadabout propensities of my countrymen? We are a vagabond nation now, that's certain, for better, for worse. I am a vagabond; I have been away from home no less than five distinct times in the last year. The Queen sets us the example—we are moving on from top to bottom. Little dirty Jack, who abides in Clement's Inn[101]gateway, and blacks my boots for a penny, takes his month's hop-picking[102]every year as a matter of course. Why shouldn't he? I am delighted at it. I love vagabonds, only I prefer poor to rich ones;-couriers[103]and ladies' maids, imperials[104]and travelling carriages are an abomination unto me—I cannot away withthem. But for dirty Jack, and every good fellow who, in the words of the capital French song, moves about,

"Comme le limaçon,Portant tout son bagage,Ses meubles, sa maison,"[105]

on his own back, why, good luck to them, and many a merry road-side adventure, and steaming supper in the chimney-corners of road-side inns, Swiss châlets,[106]Hottentot kraals,[107]or wherever else they like to go. So having succeeded in contradicting myself in my first chapter (which gives me great hopes that you will all go on, and think me a good fellow, notwithstanding my crotchets), I shall here shut up for the present, and consider my ways; having resolved to "sar' it out,"[108]as we say in the Vale, "holus bolus,"[109]just as it comes, and then you'll probably get the truth out of me.

FOOTNOTES[1]Doyle: an English artist noted for his humorous and satirical designs.[2]Matriculating: entering.[3]Yeomen: small independent farmers. They have generally constituted the best part of the English army.[4]Cloth-yard shaft: an arrow a yard in length.[5]Cressy and Agincourt: English victories over the French in 1346 and 1415.[6]Bill: a combined spear and battle-axe.[7]Culverin and demi-culverin: ancient forms of cannon.[8]Hand-grenade: a kind of bomb or shell thrown by hand.[9]Rodney, etc.: famous English naval and military commanders.[10]Talbots, etc.: noted family names of the English nobility.[11]"Sacer vates": inspired bard or poet.[12]Throw his stone, etc.: help to build their cairn or monument.[13]Clanship: here, the holding together of a class, tribe, or family.[14]Bout: contest.[15]Curacy: parish.[16]Chambers: law offices.[17]Quixotic: romantic or visionary[18]Crotchet: whim, notion, "hobby."[19]Old man with a scythe: Father Time.[20]Treadmill: a wheel on which prisoners were formerly compelled to work.[21]Berks: Berkshire, a county west of London. It is called "Royal" because it is the seat of Windsor Castle. The Vale of the White Horse gets its name from the gigantic image of a horse cut through the turf in the side of a chalk hill. Tradition says it was done over a thousand year ago, to commemorate a great victory over the Danes by Alfred.[22]Three pound ten(shillings): the English shilling is about twenty five cents, and the pound may be called five dollars.[23]Dresden: a city of Germany, noted for its treasures of art.[24]The Louvre: an ancient palace in Paris, containing vast collections of sculptures and paintings.[25]Sauer-kraut: a German dish, prepared from cabbage.[26]Bee-orchis(orkis): a wild-flower resembling a bee.[27]Down: a barren hill of chalk or sand.[28]Civil wars: those between Parliament and King Charles I., in the seventeenth century.[29]Butts: targets for archery practice. Before the invention of gunpowder they were set up by law in every parish.[30]Laid: dispelled by religious ceremonies.[31]Dulce domum: sweet home.[32]Black Monday: the end of the holidays.[33]Cosmopolites: citizens of the world at large, familiar with all countries.[34]Backsword play: the game of single-stick, or fencing with cudgels.[35]Gorse: a thick, prickly, evergreen shrub, which grows wild and bears beautiful yellow flowers.[36]Spinney: a small grove filled with undergrowth.[37]Charley: a fox.[38]Cover: a retreat, or hiding-place.[39]Old Berkshire: an association of hunters.[40]Thatched: roofed with straw or reeds.[41]Richard Swiveller: a jolly character who lives by his wits. See Dickens's "Old Curiosity Shop."[42]Mr. Stiggins: a hypocritical parson. See Dickens's "Pickwick Papers."[43]Roman camp: the Romans, when they conquered England, about 78A.D., built a stronghold here.[44]Eyrie: the nest of a bird of prey; here, a gathering-place for Roman soldiers.[45]Cairn: a heap of stones set up to mark a spot.[46]Sappers and miners: usually, soldiers employed in working on trenches and fortifications or in undermining those of an enemy; here, engaged in surveying.[47]Ordnance Map: an official or government map.[48]Balak: see Numbers xxii.[49]Alfred: Alfred the Great, King of the West Saxons, 871. He defeated the Danes, who had overrun most of England, at Ashdown, and compelled them to make a treaty of peace. He is justly considered one of the noblest and wisest of the English sovereigns; and the thousandth anniversary of his birth was celebrated in 1849, at Wantage, Berks.[50]Asser: a contemporary of Alfred; he wrote his life.[51]Saxons: a name given to certain German tribes who conquered Britain, in the fifth century. The name England came from the Angles, a people of the same stock, who settled in the east and north of the island. From these Anglo-Saxons the English have in great part descended.[52]Alma: a river in the Crimea where a desperate battle was fought between the Russians and the allied English and French in 1854.[53]Chronicler: Asser, from whom this is quoted.[54]St. George: the patron saint of England.[55]More by token: as a sign or proof that this is so.[56]Privet: a shrub much used for hedges.[57]Keeper: the gamekeeper, a man kept on great estates to look after the game.[58]Cromlech: a rude tomb built by the first inhabitants of Britain.[59]Wayland Smith's Cave: a "supernatural smith" who shod horses on payment of sixpence.[60]Sir Walter: Sir Walter Scott.[61]Inigo Jones: a celebrated architect of the 17th century.[62]Lord Craven: the owner of the estate on which the "White Horse" is located.[63]Sheep-walks: sheep pastures, for which the "downs" are much used.[64]Barrows: ancient burial mounds.[65]Public: a public house.[66]Toby Philpot jug: a large brown pitcher, shaped like a jolly old gentleman of the olden time.[67]Antediluvian: before the deluge.[68]Un: it; also him or her.[69]Grewsome: frightful.[70]Um: they.[71]Fiery cross: a cross, the ends of which had been fired and then extinguished in blood. It was sent round by the chiefs of clans in time of war, to summon their followers.[72]Plantations: groves of trees set out in regular order.[73]Squire: a country gentleman.[74]'E: thee or you.[75]Malignant: The Parliamentary or Puritan party during the civil wars of Charles I. called those who adhered to the king "malignants."[76]Tighe: this legend relates a conspiracy by which young Tighe was led into the thick of a fight and killed.[77]Pusey horn: the Pusey family hold their estate not by a title deed, but by a horn, given, it is said, to William Pecote (perhaps an ancestor of the Puseys) by Canute, a Danish king of England in the eleventh century. The horn bears the following inscription: "I, King Canute, give William Pecote this horn to hold by thy land."[78]Freeholders: landowners.[79]Moated grange: a farm or estate surrounded by a broad deep ditch for defence in old times.[80]Marianas: Mariana, a beautiful woman, one of the most lovable of Shakespeare's characters. See "Measure for Measure."[81]West-countryman: a west of England man.[82]Angular Saxon: a play on the wordsAnglo-Saxon.[83]Adscriptus glebæ: attached to the soil.[84]Chaw: "chaw bacon," a nickname for an English peasant.[85]Vools: fools.[86]Whum: home.[87]J. P.: justice of the peace.[88]Calico: white cotton cloth called calico in England, to distinguish it from print.[89]Smock frocks: coarse white frocks worn by farm laborers.[90]Yule-tide: Christmas. Clubs are formed by the poor several months in advance, to furnish coal, clothes, and poultry for Christmas time,—each member contributing a few pence weekly.[91]Mummers: maskers, merrymakers in fantastic costumes.[92]Vernacular: one's native tongue.[93]Ten-pound doctor: a quack doctor.[94]Mysteries: rude dramatic plays of a religious character, once very popular.[95]Lieges: loyal subjects.[96]Jobbers: speculators or members of corrupt political rings.[97]Assizes or Quarter Sessions: sessions of courts of justice.[98]Yeomanry review: a review of the county militia.[99]Don: a nickname for a university professor.[100]Sirens: sea-nymphs who enticed sailors into their power by their singing, and then devoured them.[101]Clement's Inn: formerly a college and residence for law students in London. It is now given up to law offices.[102]Hop-picking: all the vagabonds of London go to Kent and Surrey in the autumn to pick hops for the farmers, regarding the work as a kind of vacation frolic.[103]Courier: a person hired by wealthy travellers to go in advance and engage rooms at hotels, etc.[104]Imperial: the best seat on a French diligence or stage-coach.[105]Comme le limaçon, etc.: like the snail, carrying all his baggage, his furniture, and his house.[106]Chalet(shal-ay'): a Swiss herdsman's hut.[107]Kraal: a Hottentot hut or village.[108]"Sar' it out": deal it out.[109]"Holus bolus": all at once.

[1]Doyle: an English artist noted for his humorous and satirical designs.

[2]Matriculating: entering.

[3]Yeomen: small independent farmers. They have generally constituted the best part of the English army.

[4]Cloth-yard shaft: an arrow a yard in length.

[5]Cressy and Agincourt: English victories over the French in 1346 and 1415.

[6]Bill: a combined spear and battle-axe.

[7]Culverin and demi-culverin: ancient forms of cannon.

[8]Hand-grenade: a kind of bomb or shell thrown by hand.

[9]Rodney, etc.: famous English naval and military commanders.

[10]Talbots, etc.: noted family names of the English nobility.

[11]"Sacer vates": inspired bard or poet.

[12]Throw his stone, etc.: help to build their cairn or monument.

[13]Clanship: here, the holding together of a class, tribe, or family.

[14]Bout: contest.

[15]Curacy: parish.

[16]Chambers: law offices.

[17]Quixotic: romantic or visionary

[18]Crotchet: whim, notion, "hobby."

[19]Old man with a scythe: Father Time.

[20]Treadmill: a wheel on which prisoners were formerly compelled to work.

[21]Berks: Berkshire, a county west of London. It is called "Royal" because it is the seat of Windsor Castle. The Vale of the White Horse gets its name from the gigantic image of a horse cut through the turf in the side of a chalk hill. Tradition says it was done over a thousand year ago, to commemorate a great victory over the Danes by Alfred.

[22]Three pound ten(shillings): the English shilling is about twenty five cents, and the pound may be called five dollars.

[23]Dresden: a city of Germany, noted for its treasures of art.

[24]The Louvre: an ancient palace in Paris, containing vast collections of sculptures and paintings.

[25]Sauer-kraut: a German dish, prepared from cabbage.

[26]Bee-orchis(orkis): a wild-flower resembling a bee.

[27]Down: a barren hill of chalk or sand.

[28]Civil wars: those between Parliament and King Charles I., in the seventeenth century.

[29]Butts: targets for archery practice. Before the invention of gunpowder they were set up by law in every parish.

[30]Laid: dispelled by religious ceremonies.

[31]Dulce domum: sweet home.

[32]Black Monday: the end of the holidays.

[33]Cosmopolites: citizens of the world at large, familiar with all countries.

[34]Backsword play: the game of single-stick, or fencing with cudgels.

[35]Gorse: a thick, prickly, evergreen shrub, which grows wild and bears beautiful yellow flowers.

[36]Spinney: a small grove filled with undergrowth.

[37]Charley: a fox.

[38]Cover: a retreat, or hiding-place.

[39]Old Berkshire: an association of hunters.

[40]Thatched: roofed with straw or reeds.

[41]Richard Swiveller: a jolly character who lives by his wits. See Dickens's "Old Curiosity Shop."

[42]Mr. Stiggins: a hypocritical parson. See Dickens's "Pickwick Papers."

[43]Roman camp: the Romans, when they conquered England, about 78A.D., built a stronghold here.

[44]Eyrie: the nest of a bird of prey; here, a gathering-place for Roman soldiers.

[45]Cairn: a heap of stones set up to mark a spot.

[46]Sappers and miners: usually, soldiers employed in working on trenches and fortifications or in undermining those of an enemy; here, engaged in surveying.

[47]Ordnance Map: an official or government map.

[48]Balak: see Numbers xxii.

[49]Alfred: Alfred the Great, King of the West Saxons, 871. He defeated the Danes, who had overrun most of England, at Ashdown, and compelled them to make a treaty of peace. He is justly considered one of the noblest and wisest of the English sovereigns; and the thousandth anniversary of his birth was celebrated in 1849, at Wantage, Berks.

[50]Asser: a contemporary of Alfred; he wrote his life.

[51]Saxons: a name given to certain German tribes who conquered Britain, in the fifth century. The name England came from the Angles, a people of the same stock, who settled in the east and north of the island. From these Anglo-Saxons the English have in great part descended.

[52]Alma: a river in the Crimea where a desperate battle was fought between the Russians and the allied English and French in 1854.

[53]Chronicler: Asser, from whom this is quoted.

[54]St. George: the patron saint of England.

[55]More by token: as a sign or proof that this is so.

[56]Privet: a shrub much used for hedges.

[57]Keeper: the gamekeeper, a man kept on great estates to look after the game.

[58]Cromlech: a rude tomb built by the first inhabitants of Britain.

[59]Wayland Smith's Cave: a "supernatural smith" who shod horses on payment of sixpence.

[60]Sir Walter: Sir Walter Scott.

[61]Inigo Jones: a celebrated architect of the 17th century.

[62]Lord Craven: the owner of the estate on which the "White Horse" is located.

[63]Sheep-walks: sheep pastures, for which the "downs" are much used.

[64]Barrows: ancient burial mounds.

[65]Public: a public house.

[66]Toby Philpot jug: a large brown pitcher, shaped like a jolly old gentleman of the olden time.

[67]Antediluvian: before the deluge.

[68]Un: it; also him or her.

[69]Grewsome: frightful.

[70]Um: they.

[71]Fiery cross: a cross, the ends of which had been fired and then extinguished in blood. It was sent round by the chiefs of clans in time of war, to summon their followers.

[72]Plantations: groves of trees set out in regular order.

[73]Squire: a country gentleman.

[74]'E: thee or you.

[75]Malignant: The Parliamentary or Puritan party during the civil wars of Charles I. called those who adhered to the king "malignants."

[76]Tighe: this legend relates a conspiracy by which young Tighe was led into the thick of a fight and killed.

[77]Pusey horn: the Pusey family hold their estate not by a title deed, but by a horn, given, it is said, to William Pecote (perhaps an ancestor of the Puseys) by Canute, a Danish king of England in the eleventh century. The horn bears the following inscription: "I, King Canute, give William Pecote this horn to hold by thy land."

[78]Freeholders: landowners.

[79]Moated grange: a farm or estate surrounded by a broad deep ditch for defence in old times.

[80]Marianas: Mariana, a beautiful woman, one of the most lovable of Shakespeare's characters. See "Measure for Measure."

[81]West-countryman: a west of England man.

[82]Angular Saxon: a play on the wordsAnglo-Saxon.

[83]Adscriptus glebæ: attached to the soil.

[84]Chaw: "chaw bacon," a nickname for an English peasant.

[85]Vools: fools.

[86]Whum: home.

[87]J. P.: justice of the peace.

[88]Calico: white cotton cloth called calico in England, to distinguish it from print.

[89]Smock frocks: coarse white frocks worn by farm laborers.

[90]Yule-tide: Christmas. Clubs are formed by the poor several months in advance, to furnish coal, clothes, and poultry for Christmas time,—each member contributing a few pence weekly.

[91]Mummers: maskers, merrymakers in fantastic costumes.

[92]Vernacular: one's native tongue.

[93]Ten-pound doctor: a quack doctor.

[94]Mysteries: rude dramatic plays of a religious character, once very popular.

[95]Lieges: loyal subjects.

[96]Jobbers: speculators or members of corrupt political rings.

[97]Assizes or Quarter Sessions: sessions of courts of justice.

[98]Yeomanry review: a review of the county militia.

[99]Don: a nickname for a university professor.

[100]Sirens: sea-nymphs who enticed sailors into their power by their singing, and then devoured them.

[101]Clement's Inn: formerly a college and residence for law students in London. It is now given up to law offices.

[102]Hop-picking: all the vagabonds of London go to Kent and Surrey in the autumn to pick hops for the farmers, regarding the work as a kind of vacation frolic.

[103]Courier: a person hired by wealthy travellers to go in advance and engage rooms at hotels, etc.

[104]Imperial: the best seat on a French diligence or stage-coach.

[105]Comme le limaçon, etc.: like the snail, carrying all his baggage, his furniture, and his house.

[106]Chalet(shal-ay'): a Swiss herdsman's hut.

[107]Kraal: a Hottentot hut or village.

[108]"Sar' it out": deal it out.

[109]"Holus bolus": all at once.

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