The scene represents a spacious drawing-room in a house in Cavendish Square. The walls are somber in tone, the ceiling dingy, the hangings, though rich, are faded, and altogether the appearance of the room is solemn, formal, and depressing. On the right are folding-doors admitting to a further drawing-room. Beyond these is a single door. The wall on the left is mainly occupied by three sash-windows. The wall facing the spectators is divided by two pilasters into three panels. On the center panel is a large mirror, reflecting the fireplace; on the right hangs a large oil painting—a portrait of Sir William Gower in his judicial wig and robes. On the left hangs a companion picture—a portrait of Miss Gower. In the corners of the room there are marble columns supporting classical busts, and between the doors stands another marble column, upon which is an oil lamp. Against the lower window there are two chairs and a card-table. Behind a further table supporting a lamp stands a threefold screen. The lamps are lighted, but the curtains are not drawn, and outside the windows it is twilight.
[Sir William Gower is seated, near a table, asleep, with a newspaper over his head, concealing his face. Miss Trafalgar Gower is sitting at the further end of a couch, also asleep, and with a newspaper over her head. At the lower end of this couch sits Mrs. de Foenix—Clara—a young lady of nineteen, with a "married" air. She is engaged upon some crochet work. On the other side of the room, near a table, Rose is seated, wearing the look of a boredom which has reached the stony stage. On another couch Arthur sits, gazing at his boots, his hands in his pockets. On the right of this couch stands Captain de Foenix, leaning against the wall, his mouth open, his head thrown back, and his eyes closed. De Foenix is a young man of seven-and-twenty—an example of the heavily-whiskered "swell" of the period. Everybody is in dinner-dress. After a moment or two Arthur rises and tiptoes down to Rose. Clara raises a warning finger and says "Hush!" He nods to her, in assent.]
[On Rose's left—in a whisper.] Quiet, isn't it?
[To him, in a whisper.] Quiet! Arthur—-! [Clutching his arm.] Oh, this dreadful half-hour after dinner, every, every evening!
[Creeping across to the right of the table and sitting there.] Grandfather and Aunt Trafalgar must wake up soon. They're longer than usual to-night.
[To him, across the table.] Your sister Clara, over there, and Captain de Foenix—when they were courting, did they have to go through this?
Yes.
And now that they are married, they still endure it!
Yes.
And we, when we are married, Arthur, shallwe—-?
Yes. I suppose so.
[Passing her hand across her brow.] Phe—ew! [De Foenix, fast asleep, is now swaying, and in danger of toppling over. Clara grasps the situation and rises.]
[In a guttural whisper.] Ah, Frederick! no, no, no!
[Turning in their chairs.] Eh—what——-? ah—h—h—h!
[As Clara, reaches her husband, he lurches forward into her arms.]
[His eyes bolting.] Oh! who———<
Frederick dear, wake!
[Dazed.] How did this occur?
You were tottering, and I caught you.
[Collecting his senses.] I wemember. I placed myself in an upwight position, dearwest, to prewent myself dozing.
[Sinking on to the couch.] How you alarmed me! [Seeing that Rose is laughing, De Foenix comes down to her.]
[In a low voice.] Might have been a very serwious accident, Miss Trelawny.
[Seating herself on the footstool.] Never mind! [Pointing to the chair she has vacated.] Sit down and talk. [He glances at the old people and shakes his head.] Oh, do, do, do! do sit down, and let us all have a jolly whisper. [He sits.] Thank your Captain Fred. Go on! tell me something—anything; something about the military——
[Again looking at the old people, then wagging his finger at Rose.] I know; you want to get me into a wow. [Settling himself into his chair.] Howwid girl!
[Despairingly.] Oh—h—h!
[There is a brief pause, and then the sound of a street-organ, playing in the distance, is heard. The air is "Ever of Thee."]
Hark! [Excitedly.] Hark!
Arthur, and De Foenix.
Hush!
[Heedlessly.] The song I sang in The Peddler—The Peddler of Marseilles! the song that used to make you cry, Arthur! [They attempt vainly to hush her down, but she continues dramatically, in hoarse whispers.] And then Raphael enters—comes on to the bridge. The music continues, softly. "Raphael, why have you kept me waiting? Man, do you wish to break my heart—[thumping her breast] a woman's hear—r—rt, Raphael?"
[Sir William and Miss Gower suddenly whip off their newspapers and sit erect. Sir William is a grim, bullet-headed old gentleman of about seventy; Miss Gower a spare, prim lady, of gentle manners, verging upon sixty. They stare at each other for a moment, silently.]
What a hideous riot, Trafalgar!
dear, I hope I have been mistaken—but through my sleep I fancied I could hear you shrieking at the top of your voice.
[Sir William gets on to his feet; all rise, except Rose, who remains seated sullenly.]
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Trafalgar, it is becoming impossible for you and me to obtain repose. [Turning his head sharply.] Ha! is not that a street-organ? [To Miss Gower.] An organ?
Undoubtedly. An organ in the Square, at this hour of the evening—singularly out of place!
[Looking round.] Well, well, well, does no one stir?
[Under her breath.] Oh, don't stop it!
[Clara goes out quickly. With a great show of activity Arthur and De Foenix hurry across the room and, when there, do nothing.]
[Coming upon Rose and peering down at her.] What are ye upon the floor for, my dear? Have we no cheers? [To Miss Gower—producing his snuff-box.] Do we lack cheers here, Trafalgar?
[Going to Rose.] My dear Rose! [Raising her.] Come, come, come, this is quite out of place! Young ladies do not crouch and huddle upon the ground—do they, William?
[Taking snuff.] A moment ago I should have hazarded the opinion that they do not. [Chuckling unpleasantly.] He, he, he!
[Clara returns. The organ music ceases abruptly.]
[Coming to Sir William.] Charles was just running out to stop the organ when I reached the hall, grandpa.
Ye'd surely no intention, Clara, of venturing, yourself, into the public street—the open Square——?
[Faintly.] I meant only to wave at the man from the door——
Oh, Clara, that would hardly have been in place!
[Raising his hands.] In mercy's name, Trafalgar, what is befalling my household?
[Bursting into tears.] Oh, William——!
[Rose and Clara creep away and join the others. Miss Gower totters to Sir William and drops her head upon his breast.]
Tut, tut, tut, tut!
[Between her sobs.] I—I—I—I know what is in your mind.
[Drawing a long breath.] Ah—h—h—h!
Oh, my dear brother, be patient!
Patient!
Forgive me; I should have said hopeful. Be hopeful that I shall yet succeed in ameliorating the disturbing conditions which are affecting us so cruelly.
Sm William.
Ye never will, Trafalgar;I'vetried.
Oh, do not despond already! I feel sure there are good ingredients in Rose's character. [Clinging to him.] In time, William, we shall shape her to be a fitting wife for our rash and unfortunate Arthur——
[He shakes his head.] In time, William, in time!
[Soothing her.] Well, well, well! there, there, there! At least, my dear sister, I am perfectly aweer that I possess in you the woman above all others whose example should compel such a transformation.
[Throwing her arms about his neck.] Oh, brother, what a compliment——!
Tut, tut, tut! And now, before Charles sets the card-table, don't you think we had better—eh, Trafalgar?
Yes, yes—our disagreeable duty; let us discharge it. [Sir William takes snuff.] Rose, dear, be seated. [To everybody.] The Vice Chancellor has something to say to us. Let us all be seated.
[There is consternation among the young people. All sit.]
[Peering about him.] Are ye seated?
Yes.
What I desire to say is this. When Miss Trelawny took up her residence here, it was thought proper, in the peculiar circumstances of the case, that you, Arthur—[pointing a finger at Arthur] you——
Yes, sir.
That you should remove yourself to the establishment of your sister Clara and her husband in Holies Street, round the corner—
Yes, sir.
Yes, grandpa.
Certainly, Sir William.
Taking your food in this house, and spending other certain hours here, under the surveillance of your great-aunt Trafalgar.
Miss Gower.
Yes, William.
This was considered to be a decorous, and, toward Miss Trelawny, a highly respectful, course to pursue.
Yes, sir.
Any other course would have been out of place.
And yet—[again extending a finger at Arthur] what is this that is reported to me?
I don't know, sir.
I hear that ye have on several occasions, at night, after having quitted this house with Captain and Mrs. De Foenix, been seen on the other side of the way, your back against the railings, gazing up at Miss Trelawny's window; and that you have remained in that position for a considerable space of time. Is this true, sir?
[Boldly.] Yes, Sir William.
I venture to put a question to my grandson, Miss Trelawny.
Yes, sir, it is quite true.
Then, sir, let me acqueent you that these are not the manners, nor the practices, of a gentleman.
No, sir?
No, sir, they are the manners, and the practices, of a Troubadour.
A troubadour in Cavendish Square! quite out of place!
I—I'm very sorry, sir; I—I never looked at it in that light.
[Snuffing.] Ah—h—h—h! ho! pi—i—i—sh!
But at the same time, sir, I dare say—of course I don't speak from precise knowledge—but I dare say there were a good many—a good many——-
Good many—what sir?
A good many very respectable troubadours, sir——
[Starting to her feet, heroically and defiantly.] And what I wish to say, Sir William, is this. I wish to avow, to declare before the world, that Arthur and I have had many lengthy interviews while he has been stationed against those railings over there; I murmuring to him softly from my bedroom window, he responding in tremulous whispers——
[Struggling to his feet]. You—you tell me such things—-! [All rise.]
The Square, in which we have resided for years——! Our neighbors——!
[Shaking a trembling hand at Arthur.] The—the character of my house—-!
Again I am extremely sorry, sir—but these are the only confidential conversations Rose and I now enjoy.
[Turning upon Clara and De Foenix.] And you, Captain de Foenix—an officer and a gentleman! and you, Clara! this could scarcely have been without your cognizance, without, perhaps, your approval——!
[Charles, in plush and powder and wearing luxuriant whiskers, enters, carrying two branch candlesticks with lighted candles.]
The cawd-table, Sir William?
[Agitatedly.] Yes, yes, by all means, Charles; the card-table, as usual. [To Sir William.] A rubber will comfort you, soothe you——
[Charles carries the candlesticks to the card-table, Sir William and Miss Gower seat themselves upon a couch, she with her arm through his affectionately. Clara and De Foenix get behind the screen; their scared faces are seen occasionally over the top of it. Charles brings the card-table, opens it and arranges it, placing four chairs, which he collects from different parts of the room, round the table. Rose and Arthur talk in rapid undertones.]
Infamous! infamous!
Be calm, Rose, dear, be calm!
Tyrannical! diabolical! I cannot endure it.
[She throws herself into a chair. He stands behind her, apprehensively, endeavoring to calm her.]
[Over her shoulder.] They mean well, dearest——
[Hysterically.] Well! ha, ha, ha!
But they are rather old-fashioned people—-
Old-fashioned! they belong to the time when men and women were put to the torture. I am being tortured—mentally tortured——
They have not many more years in this world——-
Nor I, at this rate, many more months. They are killing me—like Agnes inThe Specter of St. Ives.She expires, in the fourth act, as I shall die in Cavendish Square, painfully, of no recognized disorder—
And anything we can do to make them happy——
To make the Vice Chancellor happy! I won't try! I will not! he's a fiend, a vampire-!
Oh, hush!
[Snatching up Sir William's snuff-box, which he has left upon the table.] His snuff-box! I wish I could poison his snuff, as Lucrezia Borgia would have done. She would have removed him within two hours of my arrival—I mean, her arrival. [Opening the snuff-box and mimicing Sir William.] And here he sits and lectures me, and dictates to me! to Miss Trelawny! "I venture to put a question to my grandson, Miss Trelawny!" Ha, ha! [Talcing a pinch of snuffy thoughtlessly but vigorously.] "Yah—h—h—h! pish! Have we no cheers? do we lack cheers here, Trafalgar?" [Suddenly.] Oh!
What have you done?
[In suspense, replacing the snuff-box.] The snuff—-!
dear!
[Putting her handkerchief to her nose, and rising.] Ah——-!
[Charles, having prepared the card-table, and arranged the candlesticks upon it, has withdrawn. Miss Gower and Sir William now rise.]
The table is prepared, William. Arthur, I assume you would prefer to sit and contemplate Rose——?
Thank you, aunt.
[Rose sneezes violently, and is led away, helplessly, by Arthur.]
[To Rose.] Oh, my dear child! [Looking round.] Where are Frederick and Clara?
[Appearing from behind the screen, shamefacedly.] Here.
[The intending players cut the pack and seat themselves. Sir William sits facing Captain de Foenix, Miss Gower on the right of the table, and Clara on the left.]
[While this is going on, to Rose.] Are you in pain, dearest? Rose!
Agony!
Pinch your upper lip—-
[She sneezes twice, loudly, and sinks back upon the couch.]
[Testily.] Sssh! sssh! sssh! this is to be whist, I hope.
Rose! Rose! young ladies do not sneeze quite so continuously. [De Foenix is dealing.]
[With gusto.] I will thank you, Captain de Foenix, to exercise your intelligence this evening to its furthest limit.
I'll twy, sir.
[Laughing unpleasantly.] He, he, he! last night, sir——
Poor Frederick had toothache last night, grandpa.
[Tartly.] Whist is whist, Clara, and toothache is toothache. We will endeavor to keep the two things distinct, if you please. He, he!
Your interruption was hardly in place, Clara, dear,—ah!
Hey! what?
A misdeal.
[Faintly.] Oh, Frederick!
[Partly rising.] Captain de Foenix!
I—I'm fwightfully gwieved, sir——
[The cards are re-dealt by Miss Gower. Rose now gives way to a violent paroxysm of sneezing. Sir William rises.]
William——-! [The players rise.]
[To the players.] Is this whist, may I ask?
[They sit.]
[Standing.] Miss Trelawny—
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[Weakly.] I—I think I had better—what d'ye call it?—withdraw for a few moments.
[Sitting again.] Do so.
[Rose disappears. Arthur is leaving the room with her.]
[Sharply.] Arthur! where are you going?
[Returning promptly.] I beg your pardon, aunt.
Really, Arthur—-!
[Rapping upon the table.] Tsch, tsch, tsch!
Forgive me, William. [They play.]
[Intent upon his cards.] My snuff-box, Arthur; be so obleeging as to search for it.
[Brightly.] I'll bring it to you, sir. It is on the——
Keep your voice down, sir. We are playing—[emphatically throwing down a card, as fourth player] whist. Mine.
[Picking up the trick.] No, William.
[Glaring.] No!
played a trump.
De Foenix.
Yes, sir, Clara played a trump—the seven——
I will not trouble you, Captain de Foenix, to echo Miss Gower's information.
Vevy sowwy, sir.
[Gently.] It was a little out of place, Frederick.
Sssh! whist. [Arthur is now on Sir William's right, with the snuff-box.] Eh? what? [Taking the snuff-box from Arthur.] Oh, thank ye. Much obleeged, much obleeged.
[Arthur walks away and picks up a book. Sir William turns in his chair, watching Arthur.]
You to play, William. [A pause.] William, dear——?
[She also turns, following the direction of his gaze. Laying down his cards, Sir William leaves the card-table and goes over to Arthur slowly. Those at the card-table look on apprehensively.]
[In a queer voice.] Arthur.
[Shutting his book.] Excuse me, grandfather.
Ye—ye're a troublesome young man, Arthur.
I—I don't mean to be one, sir.
As your poor father was, before ye. And if you are fool enough to marry, and to beget children, doubtless your son will follow the same course. [Taking snuff.] Y—y—yes, but I shall be dead 'n' gone by that time, it's likely. Ah—h—h—h! pi—i—i—sh! I shall be sitting in the Court Above by that time—- [From the adjoining room comes the sound of Rose's voice singing "Ever of Thee" to the piano. There is great consternation at the card-table. Arthur is moving towards the folding-doors, Sir William detains him.] No, no, let her go on, I beg. Let her continue. [Returning to the card-table, with deadly calmness.] We will suspend our game while this young lady performs her operas.
[Rising and taking his arm.] William——!
[In the same tone.] I fear this is no' longer a comfortable home for ye, Trafalgar; no longer the home for a gentlewoman. I apprehend that in these days my house approaches somewhat closely to a Pandemonium. [Suddenly taking up the cards, in a fury, and flinging them across the room.] And this is whist—whist——!
[Clara and De Foenix rise and stand together. Arthur pushes open the upper part of the folding-doors.]
stop! Rose!
[The song ceases and Rose appears.]
[At the folding-doors.] Did anyone call?
You have upset my grandfather!
Miss Trelawny, how—how dare you do anything so—so out of place?
There's a piano in there, Miss Gower.
You are acquainted with the rule of this household—no music when the Vice Chancellor is within doors.
But there are so many rules. One of them is that you may not sneeze.
Ha! you must never answer—-
No, that's another rule.
Oh, for shame!
You see, aunt, Rose is young, and—and—you make no allowance for her, give her no chance——
Great Heaven! what is this you are charging me with?
I don't think the "rules" of this house are fair to Rose I oh, I must say it—they are horribly unfair!
[Clinging to Sir William.] Brother!
Trafalgar! [Putting her aside and advancing to Arthur.] Oh, indeed, sir! and so you deliberately accuse your great-aunt of acting toward ye and Miss Trelawnymala fide——
Grandfather, what I intended to——
I will afford ye the opportunity of explaining what ye intended to convey, downstairs, at once, in the library. [A general shudder.] Obleege me by following me, sir. [To Clara and De Foenix.] Captain de Foenix, I see no prospect of any further social relaxation this evening. You and Clara will do me the favor of attending in the hall, in readiness to take this young man back to Holies Street. [Giving his arm to Miss Gower.] My dear sister—— [To Arthur.] Now, sir.
[Sir William and Miss Gower go out Arthur comes to Rose and kisses her.]
Good-night, dearest: Oh, good-night! Oh, Rose!
[Outside the door.] Mr. Arthur Gower!
I am coming, sir—- [He goes out quickly.]
[Approaching Rose and taking her hand sympathetically.] Haw——-! I—weally—haw!——
Yes, I know what you would say. Thank you, Captain Fred.
[Embracing Rose.] Never mind! we will continue to let Arthur out at night as usual. I am a married woman! [joining De Foenix], and a married woman will turn, if you tread upon her often enough——-!
[De Foenix and Clara depart.]
[Pacing the room, shaking her hands in the air desperately.] Oh—h—h! ah—h—h!
[The upper part of the folding-doors opens, and Charles appears.]
[Mysteriously.] Miss Rose—-
What—
[Advancing.] I see Sir William h'and the rest descend the stairs. I 'ave been awaitin' the chawnce of 'andin' you this, Miss Rose.
[He produces a dirty scrap of paper, wet and limp, with writing upon it, and gives it to her.]
[Handling it daintly.] Oh, it's damp!—
Yes, miss; a little gentle shower 'ave been takin' place h'outside—'eat spots, cook says.
[Reading.] Ah! from some of my friends. Charles.
[Behind his hand.] Perfesshunnal, Miss Rose?
[Intent upon the note.] Yes—yes—-
I was reprimandin' the organ, miss, when I observed them lollin' against the square railin's examinin' h'our premises, and they wentured for to beckon me. An egstremely h'affable party, miss. [Hiding his face.] Ho! one of them caused me to laff!
[Excitedly.] They want to speak to me—[referring to the note] to impart something to me of an important nature. Oh, Charles, I know not what to do!
[Languishingly.] Whatever friends may loll against them railin's h'opposite, Miss Rose, you 'ave one true friend in this 'ouse—Chawles Gibbons——
Thank you, Charles. Mr. Briggs, the butler, is sleeping out to-night, isn't he?
Yes, miss, he 'ave leave to sleep at his sister's. I 'appen to know he 'ave gone to Cremorne.
Then, when Sir William and Miss Gower have retired, do you think you could let me go forth; and wait at the front door while I run across and grant my friends a hurried interview?
Suttingly, miss.
If it reached the ears of Sir William, or Miss Gower, you would lose your place, Charles!
[Haughtily.] I'm aweer, miss; but Sir William was egstremely rood to me dooring dinner, over that mis'ap to the ontray——- [A bell rings violently.] S'william!
[He goes out. The rain is heard pattering against the window panes. Rose goes from one window to another, looking out. It is now almost black outside the windows.]
[Discovering her friends.] Ah! yes, yes! ah—h—h—h! [She snatches an antimacassar from a chair and jumping onto the couch, waves it frantically to those outside.] The dears! the darlings! the faithful creatures——! [Listening.] Oh———!
[She descends, in a hurry, and flings the antimacassar under the couch, as Miss Gower enters. At the same moment there is a vivid flash of lightning.]
[Startled.] Oh, how dreadful! [To Rose, frigidly.] The Vice Chancellor has felt the few words he has addressed to Arthur, and has retired for the night. [There is a roll of thunder. Rose alarmed, Miss Gower clings to a chair.] Mercy on us! Go to bed, child, directly. We will all go to our beds, hoping to awake to-morrow in a meeker and more submissive spirit. [Kissing Rose upon the brow.] Good-night. [Another flash of lightning.] Oh——! Don't omit to say your prayers, Rose—and in a simple manner. I always fear that, from your peculiar training, you may declaim them. That is so out of place—oh!
[Another roll of thunder. Rose goes across the room, meeting Charles, who enters carrying a lantern. They exchange significant glances, and she disappears.]
[Coming to Miss Gower.] I am now at liberty to accompany you round the 'ouse, ma'am——[A flash of lightning.]
Ah——-! [Her hand to her heart.] Thank you,
Charles—but to-night I must ask you to see that everything is secure, alone. This storm—so very seasonable; but, from girlhood, I could never—-
[A roll of thunder.] Oh, good-night!
[She flutters away. The rain beats still more violently upon the window panes.]
[Glancing at the window.] Ph—e—e—w! Great 'evans!
[He is dropping the curtains at the window when Rose appears at the folding-doors.]
[In a whisper.] Charles!
Miss?
[Coming into the room, distractedly.] Miss Gower has gone to bed.
Yes, miss—oh——! [A flash of lightning.]
Oh! my friends! my poor friends!
H'and Mr. Briggs at Cremorne! Reelly, I should 'ardly advise you to wenture h'out, miss——
Out! no! Oh, but get them in!
In, Miss Rose! indoors!
Under cover—— [A roll of thunder.] Oh!
[Wringing her hands.] They are my friends! is it a rule that I am never to see a friend, that I mayn't even give a friend shelter in a violent storm? [To Charles.] Are you the only one up?
I b'lieve so, miss. Any'ow the wimming-servants is quite h'under my control.
Then tell my friends to be deathly quiet, and to creep—to tip-toe— [The rain strikes the window again. She picks up the lantern which Charles has deposited upon the floor, and gives it to him.]
Make haste! I'll draw the curtains—[He hurries out. She goes from window to window, dropping the curtains, talking to herself excitedly as she does so.] My friends! my own friends! ah! I'm not to sneeze in this house! nor to sing! or breathe, next! wretches! oh, my! wretches! [Blowing out the candles and removing the candlesticks to the table, singing, under her breath, wildly.] "Ever of thee I'm fondly dreaming——" [Mimicking Sir William again.] "What are ye upon the floor for, my dear? Have we no cheers? do we lack cheers here, Trafalgar——?" [Charles returns.]
[To those who follow him.] Hush! [To Rose.] I
discovered 'em clustered in the doorway——
[There is a final peal of thunder as Avonia, Gadd, Colpoys, and Tom Wrench enter, somewhat diffidently. They are apparently soaked to their skins, and are altogether in a deplorable condition. Avonia alone has an umbrella, which she allows to drip upon the carpet, but her dress and petticoats are bedraggled, her finery limp, her hair lank and loose.]
'Vonia!