Enter LordRake, SirJohn, &c. with Swords drawn.
Lord Rake.Isthe Dog dead?
Col. Bully.No, damn him, I heard him wheeze.
Lord Rake.How the Witch his Wife howl'd!
Col. Bully.Ay, she'll alarm the Watch presently.
Lord Rake.Appear, Knight, then; come, you have a good Cause to fight for—there's a Man murder'd.
Sir John.Is there? Then let his Ghost be satisfy'd;for I'll sacrifice a Constable to it presently, and burn his Body upon his wooden Chair.
Enter a Taylor, with a Bundle under his Arm.
Col. Bully.How now? What have we got here? A Thief.
Taylor.No, an't please you, I'm no Thief.
Lord Rake.That we'll see presently: Here, let the General examine him.
Sir John.Ay, ay, let me examine him, and I'll lay a hundred Pound I find him guilty, in spite of his Teeth—for he looks—like a—sneaking Rascal. Come, Sirrah, without Equivocation or mental Reservation, tell me of what Opinion you are, and what Calling; for by them——I shall guess at your Morals.
Taylor.An't please you, I'm a Dissenting Journeyman Taylor.
Sir John.Then, Sirrah, you love Lying by your Religion, and Theft by your Trade: And so, that your Punishment may be suitable to your Crimes—I'll have you first gagg'd—and then hang'd.
Tayl.Pray, good worthy Gentlemen, don't abuse me: indeed I'm an honest Man, and a good Workman, tho' I say it, that should not say it.
Sir John.No Words, Sirrah, but attend your Fate.
Lord Rake.Let me see what's in that Bundle.
Tayl.An't please you, it is the Doctor of the Parish's Gown.
Lord Rake.The Doctor's Gown!—--Hark you, Knight, you won't stick at abusing the Clergy, will you?
Sir John.No, I'm drunk, and I'll abuse any thing—but my Wife; and her I name—with Reverence.
Lord Rake.Then you shall wear this Gown, whilst you charge the Watch; that tho' the Blows fall upon you, the Scandal may light upon the Church.
Sir John.A generous Design——by all the Gods——give it me.
[Takes the Gown, and puts it on.
Tayl.O dear Gentlemen, I shall be quite undone, if you take the Gown.
Sir John.Retire, Sirrah; and since you carry off your Skin—go home and be happy.
Tayl.[Pausing.] I think I had e'en as good follow the Gentleman's friendly Advice; for if I dispute any longer, who knows but the Whim may take him to case me? These Courtiers are fuller of Tricks than they are of Money; they'll sooner cut a Man's Throat, than pay his Bill.
[ExitTaylor.
Sir John.So, how do you like my Shapes now?
Lord Rake.This will do to a Miracle; he looks like a Bishop going to the Holy War. But to your Arms, Gentlemen, the Enemy appears.
Enter Constable and Watch.
Watch.Stand! Who goes there? Come before the Constable.
Sir John.The Constable is a Rascal——and you are the Son of a Whore.
Watch.A good civil Answer for a Parson, truly!
Constab.Methinks, Sir, a Man of your Coat might set a better Example.
Sir John.Sirrah, I'll make you know——there are Men of my Coat can set as bad Examples——as you can do, you Dog, you.
[SirJohnstrikes the Constable. They knock him down, disarm him, and seize him. Lord Rake, &c. run away.
Constab.So, we have secur'd the Parson, however.
Sir John.Blood, and Blood——and Blood.
Watch.Lord have mercy upon us! How the wicked Wretch raves of Blood! I'll warrant he has been murdering some body to-night.
Sir John.Sirrah, there's nothing got by Murder but a Halter: My Talent lies towards Drunkenness and Simony.
Watch.Why, that now was spoke like a Man of Parts, Neighbours; 'tis pity he shou'd be so disguised.
Sir John.You lye——I'm not disguis'd; for I am drunk barefac'd.
Watch.Look you there again—This is a mad Parson, Mr.Constable; I'll lay a Pot of Ale upon 's Head, he's a good Preacher.
Constab.Come, Sir, out of respect to your Calling, Ishan't put you into the Round-house; but we must secure you in our Drawing-room till Morning, that you may do no Mischief. So, come along.
Sir John.You may put me where you will, Sirrah, now you have overcome me——But if I can't do Mischief, I'll think of Mischief—in spite of your Teeth, you Dog, you.
[Exeunt.
EnterHeartfreesolus.
Whatthe Plague ails me?——Love? No, I thank you for that, my Heart's Rock still——Yet 'tisBelindathat disturbs me; that's positive——Well, what of all that? Must I love her for being troublesome? At that rate I might love all the Women I meet, I'gad. But hold!—Tho' I don't love her for disturbing me, yet she may disturb me, because I love her——Ay, that may be, 'faith. I have dreamt of her, that's certain——Well, so I have of my Mother; therefore what's that to the purpose? Ay, butBelindaruns in my Mind waking—and so does many a damn'd thing that I don't care a Farthing for——Methinks, tho', I would fain be talking to her, and yet I have no Business——Well, am I the first Man that has had a Mind to do an impertinent thing?
EnterConstant.
Const.How now,Heartfree? What makes you up and dress'd so soon? I thought none but Lovers quarrell'd with their Beds; I expected to have found you snoring, as I us'd to do.
Heart.Why, 'faith, Friend, 'tis the Care I have of your Affairs, that makes me so thoughtful; I have been studying all Night how to bring your matter about withBelinda.
Const.WithBelinda?
Heart.With my Lady, I mean: And, 'faith, I have mighty Hopes on't. Sure you must be very well satisfied with her Behaviour to you yesterday?
Const.So well, that nothing but a Lover's Fears can make me doubt of Success. But what can this sudden Change proceed from?
Heart.Why, you saw her Husband beat her, did you not?
Const.That's true: A Husband is scarce to be borne upon any terms, much less when he fights with his Wife. Methinks, she shou'd e'en have cuckolded him upon the very spot, to shew that after the Battle she was Master of the Field.
Heart.A Council of War of Women wou'd infallibly have advis'd her to't. But, I confess, so agreeable a Woman asBelindadeserves better Usage.
Const.Belindaagain!
Heart.My Lady, I mean. What a Pox makes me blunder so to-day? [Aside.] A Plague of this treacherous Tongue!
Const.Pr'ythee, look upon me seriously,Heartfree—Now answer me directly: Is it my Lady, orBelinda, employs your careful Thoughts thus?
Heart.My Lady, orBelinda?
Const.In Love; by this Light, in Love.
Heart.In Love!
Const.Nay, ne'er deny it; for thou'lt do it so aukwardly, 'twill but make the Jest sit heavier about thee. My dear Friend, I give thee much Joy.
Heart.Why, pr'ythee, you won't persuade me to it, will you?
Const.That she's Mistress of your Tongue, that's plain; and I know you are so honest a Fellow, your Tongue and Heart always go together. But how, but how the Devil? Pha, ha, ha, ha—
Heart.Hey-dey! Why, sure you don't believe it in earnest?
Const.Yes, I do, because I see you deny it in jest.
Heart.Nay, but look you,Ned—a——deny in jest——a——gadzooks, you know I say——a——when a Man denies a thing in jest—a—
Const.Pha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Heart.Nay, then we shall have it: What, because a Man stumbles at a Word: did you never make a Blunder?
Const.Yes; for I am in Love, I own it.
Heart.Then, so am I—Now laugh till thy Soul's glutted with Mirth. [Embracing him.] But, dearConstant, don't tell the Town on't.
Const.Nay, then, 'twere almost pity to laugh at thee, after so honest a Confession. But tell us a little,Jack, by what new-invented Arms has this mighty Stroke been given?
Heart.E'en by that unaccountable Weapon call'dJe-ne-sçai-quoy: For every thing that can come within the Verge of Beauty, I have seen it with indifference.
Const.So in few Words, then, theJe-ne-sçai-quoyhas been too hard for the quilted Petticoat.
Heart.I'gad, I think theJe-ne-sçai-quoyis in the quilted Petticoat; at least 'tis certain, I ne'er think on't without——a——aJe-ne-sçai-quoyin every Part about me.
Const.Well, but have all your Remedies lost their Virtue? Have you turn'd her inside out yet?
Heart.I dare not so much as think on't.
Const.But don't the two Years Fatigue I have had discourage you?
Heart.Yes: I dread what I foresee; yet cannot quit the Enterprize. Like some Soldiers, whose Courage dwells more in their Honour, than their Nature—on they go, tho' the Body trembles at what the Soul makes it undertake.
Const.Nay, if you expect your Mistress will use you as your Profanations against her Sex deserve, you tremble justly. But how do you intend to proceed, Friend?
Heart.Thou know'st I'm but a Novice; be friendly, and advise me.
Const.Why, look you, then: I'd have you—Serenade and a——write a Song——Go to Church; Look like a Fool——Be very officious; Ogle, write and lead out: And who knows but in a Year or two's time you maybe——call'd a troublesome Puppy, and sent about your Business.
Heart.That's hard.
Const.Yet thus it oft falls out with Lovers, Sir.
Heart.Pox on me for making one of the Number!
Const.Have a care: Say no saucy things; 'twill but augment your Crime; and if your Mistress hears on't, increase your Punishment.
Heart.Pr'ythee say something, then, to encourage me; you know I help'd you in your Distress.
Const.Why, then, to encourage you to Perseverance, tho' you may be thoroughly ill-us'd for your Offences; I'll put you in mind, that even the coyest Ladies of 'em all are made up of Desires, as well as we; and tho' they do hold out a long time, they will capitulate at last. For that thundering Engineer, Nature, does make such havock in the Town, they must surrender at long run, or perish in their own Flames.
Enter a Footman.
Foot.Sir, there's a Porter without with a Letter; he desires to give it into your own Hands.
Const.Call him in.
Enter Porter.
Const.What,Joe! Is it thee?
Porter.An't please you, Sir, I was order'd to deliver this into your own Hands by two well-shap'd Ladies, at theNew Exchange. I was at your Honour's Lodgings, and your Servants sent me hither.
Const.'Tis well; are you to carry any Answer?
Porter.No, my noble Master. They gave me my Orders, and whip they were gone, like a Maidenhead at Fifteen.
Const.Very well; there.
[Gives him Money.
Porter.God bless your Honour!
[Exit Porter.
Const.Now let's see what honest, trustyJoehas brought us.
Reads.
If you and your Play-Fellow can spare time from your Business and Devotions, don't fail to be atSpring-Gardenabout Eight in the Evening. You'll find nothing there but Women, so you need bring no other Arms than what you usually carry about you.
If you and your Play-Fellow can spare time from your Business and Devotions, don't fail to be atSpring-Gardenabout Eight in the Evening. You'll find nothing there but Women, so you need bring no other Arms than what you usually carry about you.
So, Play-fellow: here's something to stay your Stomach till your Mistress's Dish is ready for you.
Heart.Some of our old batter'd Acquaintance. I won't go, not I.
Const.Nay, that you can't avoid; there's Honour in the Case; 'tis a Challenge, and I want a Second.
Heart.I doubt I shall be but a very useless one to you; for I'm so dishearten'd by this WoundBelindahas given me, I don't think I shall have Courage enough to draw my Sword.
Const.O, if that be all, come along; I'll warrant you find Sword enough for such Enemies as we have to deal withal.
[Exeunt.
Enter Constable, &c. with SirJohn.
Constab.Come along, Sir; I thought to have let you slip this Morning, because you were a Minister; but you are as drunk and as abusive as ever. We'll see what the Justice of the Peace will say to you.
Sir John.And you shall see what I'll say to the Justice of the Peace, Sirrah.
[They knock at the Door.
Enter Servant.
Constab.Pray, acquaint his Worship, we have got an unruly Parson here: We are unwilling to expose him, but don't know what to do with him.
Serv.I'll acquaint my Master.
[Exit Serv.
Sir John.You——Constable—What damn'd Justice is this?
Constab.One that will take Care of you, I warrant you.
Enter Justice.
Just.Well, Mr. Constable, what's the Disorder here?
Constab.An't please your Worship——
Sir John.Let me speak, and be damn'd: I'm a Divine, and can unfold Mysteries better than you can do.
Just.Sadness, sadness! A Minister so overtaken! Pray, Sir, give the Constable leave to speak, and I'll hear you very patiently: I assure you, Sir, I will.
Sir John.Sir——You are a very civil Magistrate! Your most humble Servant.
Constab.An't please your Worship, then, he has attempted to beat the Watch to-night, and swore——
Sir John.You lye.
Just.Hold, pray, Sir, a little.
Sir John.Sir, your very humble Servant.
Constab.Indeed, Sir, he came at us without any Provocation, call'd us Whores and Rogues, and laid us on with a great Quarter-staff. He was in my LordRake's Company: They have been playing the Devil to-night.
Just.Hem——Hem——Pray, Sir——may you be Chaplain to my Lord?
Sir John.Sir——I presume——I may if I will.
Just.My meaning, Sir, is——Are you so?
Sir John.Sir—You mean very well.
Just.He, hem——hem——Under Favour, Sir, pray answer me directly.
Sir John.Under Favour, Sir——Do you use to answer directly when you are drunk?
Just.Good lack, good lack! Here's nothing to be got from him: Pray, Sir, may I crave your Name?
Sir John.Sir——My Name's——[He hiccups.] Hiccup, Sir.
Just.Hiccup? DoctorHiccup, I have known a great many Country Parsons of that Name, especially down in theFenns. Pray where do you live, Sir?
Sir John.Here——and there, Sir.
Just.Why, what a strange Man is this! Where do you preach, Sir? Have you any Cure?
Sir John.Sir——I have——a very good Cure——for a Clap, at your Service.
Just.Lord have mercy upon us!
Sir John.[Aside.] This Fellow asks so many impertinent Questions, I believe, I'gad, 'tis the Justice's Wife in the Justice's Clothes.
Just.Mr. Constable, I vow and protest, I don't know what to do with him.
Constab.Truly, he has been but a troublesome Guest to us all Night.
Just.I think, I had e'en best let him go about his Business; for I'm unwilling to expose him.
Constab.E'en what your Worship thinks fit.
Sir John.Sir——not to interrupt Mr. Constable, I have a small Favour to ask.
Just.Sir, I open both my Ears to you.
Sir John.Sir, your very humble Servant. I have a little urgent Business calls upon me; and therefore I desire the Favour of you to bring Matters to a Conclusion.
Just.Sir, if I were sure that Business were not to commit more Disorders, I wou'd release you.
Sir John.None——By my Priesthood!
Just.Then, Mr. Constable, you may discharge him.
Sir John.Sir, your very humble Servant. If you please to accept of a Bottle—
Just.I thank you, kindly, Sir; but I never drink in a Morning. Good-by t'ye, Sir, good-by t'ye.
Sir John.Good by t'ye, good Sir. [Exit Justice.] So——now, Mr. Constable, shall you and I go pick up a Whore together?
Constab.No, thank you, Sir; my Wife's enough to satisfy any reasonable Man.
Sir John.[Aside.] He, he, he, he—the Fool is married, then. Well, you won't go?
Constab.Not I, truly.
Sir John.Then I'll go by myself; and you and yourWife may be damn'd.
[Exit SirJohn.
Constable.[Gazing after him.] Why, God a-mercy, Parson?
[Exeunt.
ConstantandHeartfreecross the Stage. As they go off, enter LadyFancyfullandMadamoisellemask'd, and dogging 'em.
Const.So; I think we are about the time appointed: let us walk up this way.
[Exeunt.
Lady Fan.Good: Thus far I have dogg'd 'em without being discover'd. 'Tis infallibly some Intrigue that brings them toSpring-Garden. How my poor Heart is torn and rackt with Fear and Jealousy! Yet let it be any thing but that FlirtBelinda, and I'll try to bear it. But if it prove her, all that's Woman in me shall be employ'd to destroy her.
[Exeunt afterConstantandHeartfree.
Re-enterConstantandHeartfree, LadyFancyfullandMadamoisellestill following at a Distance.
Const.I see no Females yet, that have any thing to say to us. I'm afraid we are banter'd.
Heart.I wish we were; for I'm in no Humour to make either them or myself merry.
Const.Nay, I'm sure you'll make them merry enough, if I tell 'em why you are dull. But pr'ythee why so heavy and sad before you begin to be ill us'd?
Heart.For the same Reason, perhaps, that you are so brisk and well pleas'd; because both Pains and Pleasures are generally more considerable in Prospect, than when they come to pass.
Enter LadyBruteandBelinda, mask'd and poorly dress'd.
Const.How now! who are these? Not our Game, I hope.
Heart.If they are, we are e'en well enough serv'd, to come a-hunting here, when we had so much better Game in Chase elsewhere.
Lady Fan.[To Madamoiselle.] So, those are their Ladies, without doubt. But I'm afraid thatDoilyStuff is not worn for want of better Clothes. They are the very Shape and Size ofBelindaand her Aunt.
Madam.So dey be inteed, Matam.
Lady Fan.We'll slip into this close Arbour, where we may hear all they say.
[Exeunt LadyFancyfullandMadamoiselle.
Lady Brute.What, are you afraid of us, Gentlemen?
Heart.Why, truly, I think we may, if Appearance don't lye.
Bel.Do you always find Women what they appear to be, Sir?
Heart.No, forsooth; but I seldom find 'em better than they appear to be.
Bel.Then the Outside's best, you think?
Heart.'Tis the honestest.
Const.Have a care,Heartfree; you are relapsing again.
Lady Brute.Why, does the Gentleman use to rail at Women?
Const.He has done formerly.
Bel.I suppose he had very good Cause for't. They did not use you so well as you thought you deserv'd, Sir.
Lady Brute.They made themselves merry at your Expence, Sir.
Bel.Laugh'd when you sigh'd—
Lady Brute.Slept while you were waking—
Bel.Had your Porter beat—
Lady Brute.And threw your Billet-doux in the Fire.
Heart.Hey-day, I shall do more than rail presently.
Bel.Why, you won't beat us, will you?
Heart.I don't know but I may.
Const.What the Devil's coming here? SirJohnin a Gown——And drunk, i'faith.
Enter SirJohn.
Sir John.What a Pox——here'sConstant,Heartfree—and two Whores, I'gad——O you covetous Rogues! what, have you never a spare Punk for your Friend?——But I'll share with you.
[He seizes both the Women.
Heart.Why, what the plague have you been doing, Knight?
Sir John.Why, I have been beating the Watch, and scandalizing the Clergy.
Heart.A very good Account, truly.
Sir John.And what do you think I'll do next?
Const.. Nay, that no Man can guess.
Sir John.Why, if you'll let me sup with you, I'll treat both your Strumpets.
Lady Brute.[Aside.] O Lord, we're undone!
Heart.No, we can't sup together, because we have some Affairs elsewhere. But if you'll accept of these two Ladies, we'll be so complaisant to you, to resign our Right in 'em.
Bel.[Aside.] Lord, what shall we do?
Sir John.Let me see; their Clothes are such damn'd Clothes, they won't pawn for the Reckoning.
Heart.Sir John, your Servant. Rapture attend you!
Const.Adieu, Ladies, make much of the Gentleman.
Lady Brute.Why, sure, you won't leave us in the Hands of a drunken Fellow to abuse us.
Sir John.Who do you call a drunken Fellow, you Slut you? I'm a Man of Quality; the King has made me a Knight.
[Heart.runs off.
Heart.Ay, ay, you are in good Hands! Adieu, Adieu!
Lady Brute.The Devil's Hands: Let me go, or I'll—For Heaven's sake, protect us!
[She breaks from him, runs toConstant, twitching off her Mask, and clapping it on again.
Sir John.I'll Devil you, you Jade you. I'll demolish your ugly Face.
Const.Hold a little, Knight, she swoons.
Sir John.I'll swoon her.
Const.Hey,Heartfree.
Re-enterHeartfree.Belindaruns to him, and shews her Face.
Heart.O Heavens! My dear Creature, stand there a little.
Const.Pull him off,Jack.
Heart.Hold, mighty Man; look ye, Sir, we did but jest with you. These are Ladies of our Acquaintance that we had a mind to frighten a little, but now you must leave us.
Sir John.Oons, I won't leave you, not I.
Heart.Nay, but you must, though; and therefore make no Words on't.
Sir John.Then you are a couple of damned uncivil Fellows. And I hope your Punks will give you Sauce to your Mutton.
[Exit SirJohn.
Lady Brute.Oh, I shall never come to myself again, I'm so frightened.
Const.'Twas a narrow 'Scape, indeed.
Bel.Women must have Frolicks, you see, whatever they cost them.
Heart.This might have proved a dear one, though.
Lady Brute.You are the more obliged to us for the Risk we run upon your Accounts.
Const.And I hope you'll acknowledge something due to our Knight-Errantry, Ladies. This is the second time we have delivered you.
Lady Brute.'Tis true; and since we see Fate has designed you for our Guardians, 'twill make us the more willing to trust ourselves in your Hands. But you must not have the worse Opinion of us for our innocent Frolick.
Heart.Ladies, you may command our Opinions in every thing that is to your Advantage.
Bel.Then, Sir, I command you to be of Opinion, That Women are sometimes better than they appear to be.
[LadyBruteandConstanttalk apart.
Heart.Madam, you have made a Convert of me in every thing. I'm grown a Fool: I cou'd be fond of a Woman.
Bel.I thank you, Sir, in the Name of the whole Sex.
Heart.Which Sex nothing but yourself cou'd ever have aton'd for.
Bel.Now has my Vanity a devilish Itch, to know in what my Merit consists.
Heart.In your Humility, Madam, that keeps you ignorant it consists at all.
Bel.One other Compliment, with that serious Face, and I hate you for ever after.
Heart.Some Women love to be abus'd: Is that it you wou'd be at?
Bel.No, not that, neither: But I'd have Men talk plainly what's fit for Women to hear; without putting 'em either to a real or an affected Blush.
Heart.Why, then, in as plain Terms as I can find to express myself, I could love you even to—Matrimony itself a'most, I'gad.
Bel.Just as SirJohndid her Ladyship there.——What think you? Don't you believe one Month's time might bring you down to the same Indifference, only clad in a little better Manners, perhaps? Well, you Men are unaccountable things, mad till you have your Mistresses, and then stark mad till you are rid of 'em again. Tell me honestly, Is not your Patience put to a much severer Trial after Possession than before?
Heart.With a great many I must confess it is, to our eternal Scandal; but I——dear Creature, do but try me.
Bel.That's the surest way, indeed, to know, but not the safest. [To LadyBrute.] Madam, are not you for taking a Turn in the Great Walk? It's almost dark, no body will know us.
Lady Brute.Really I find myself something idle,Belinda: besides, I doat upon this little odd private Corner. But don't let my lazy Fancy confine you. [Const. aside.] So, she wou'd be left alone with me; that's well.
Bel.Well, we'll take one Turn, and come to you again. [ToHeart.] Come, Sir, shall we go pry into the Secrets of the Garden? Who knows what Discoveries we may make?
Heart.Madam, I'm at your Service.
Const.[ToHeart. aside.] Don't make too much haste back; for, d'ye hear?——I may be busy.
Heart.Enough.
[ExeuntBelindaandHeartfree.
Lady Brute.Sure you think me scandalously free, Mr.Constant. I'm afraid I shall lose your good Opinion of me.
Const.My good Opinion, Madam, is like your Cruelty——ne'er to be remov'd.
Lady Brute.But if I should remove my Cruelty, then there's an end of your good Opinion.
Const.There is not so strict an Alliance between 'em, neither. 'Tis certain I shou'd love you then better (if that be possible) than I do now; and where I love, I always esteem.
Lady Brute.Indeed, I doubt you much. Why, suppose you had a Wife, and she should entertain a Gallant?
Const.If I gave her just Cause, how cou'd I justly condemn her?
Lady Brute.Ah! but you'd differ widely about just Causes.
Const.But Blows can bear no Dispute.
Lady Brute.Nor ill Manners much, truly.
Const.Then no Woman upon Earth has so just a Cause as you have.
Lady Brute.O, but a faithful Wife is a beautiful Character.
Const.To a deserving Husband, I confess it is.
Lady Brute.But can his Faults release my Duty?
Const.In Equity, without doubt. And where Laws dispense with Equity, Equity should dispense with Laws.
Lady Brute.Pray let's leave this Dispute; for you Men have as much Witchcraft in your Arguments, as Women have in their Eyes.
Const.But whilst you attack me with your Charms, 'tis but reasonable I assault you with mine.
Lady Brute.The Case is not the same. What Mischief we do, we can't help, and therefore are to be forgiven.
Const.Beauty soon obtains Pardon for the Pain thatit gives, when it applies the Balm of Compassion to the Wound: But a fine Face, and a hard Heart, is almost as bad as an ugly Face and a soft one; both very troublesome to many a poor Gentleman.
Lady Brute.Yes, and to many a poor Gentlewoman, too, I can assure you. But pray, which of 'em is it that most afflicts you?
Const.Your Glass and Conscience will inform you, Madam. But for Heaven's sake (for now I must be serious), if Pity, or if Gratitude can move you; [Taking her Hand.] if Constancy and Truth have power to tempt you; if Love, if Adoration can affect you; give me at least some Hopes, that Time may do what you perhaps mean never to perform; 'twill ease my Sufferings, tho' not quench my Flame.
Lady Brute.Your Sufferings eas'd, your Flame wou'd soon abate: And that I would preserve, not quench it, Sir.
Const.Wou'd you preserve it, nourish it with Favours; for that's the Food it naturally requires.
Lady Brute.Yet on that natural Food 'twould surfeit soon, shou'd I resolve to grant all you wou'd ask.
Const.And in refusing all, you starve it. Forgive me, therefore, since my Hunger rages, if I at last grow wild, and in my frenzy force at least this from you. [Kissing her Hand.] Or if you'd have my Flame soar higher still, then grant me this, and this, and Thousands more; [Kissing first her Hand, then her Neck.] [Aside.] For now's the time she melts into Compassion.
Lady Brute.[Aside.] Poor Coward Virtue, how it shuns the Battle! O Heavens! let me go.
Const.Ay, go, ay: Where shall we go, my charming Angel——into this private Arbour——Nay, let's lose no time——Moments are precious.
Lady Brute.And Lovers wild. Pray let us stop here; at least for this time.
Const.'Tis impossible; he that has power over you, can have none over himself.
As he is forcing her into the Arbour, LadyFancyfullandMadamoisellebolt out upon them, and run over the Stage.
Lady Brute.Ah! I'm lost!
Lady Fan.Fe, fe, fe, fe, fe.
Madam.Fe, fe, fe, fe, fe.
Const.Death and Furies, who are these?
Lady Brute.O Heavens! I'm out of my Wits; if they knew me, I am ruin'd.
Const.Don't be frightened: Ten thousand to one they are Strangers to you.
Lady Brute.Whatever they are, I won't stay here a Moment longer.
Const.Whither will you go?
Lady Brute.Home, as if the Devil were in me. Lord, where's thisBelindanow?
EnterBelindaandHeartfree.
O! 'tis well you are come: I'm so frightened, my Hair stands an end. Let's be gone, for Heaven's sake!
Bel.Lord, what's the matter?
Lady Brute.The Devil's the Matter; we are discovered. Here's a couple of Women have done the most impertinent thing. Away, away, away, away, away.
[Exit running.
Re-enter LadyFancyfullandMadamoiselle.
Lady Fan.Well,Madamoiselle, 'tis a prodigious thing how Women can suffer filthy Fellows to grow so familiar with 'em.
Madam.Ah Madame, il n'y a rien de si naturel.
Lady Fan.Fe, fe, fe! But, oh my Heart! O Jealousy! O Torture! I'm upon the rack. What shall I do? My Lover's lost, I ne'er shall see him mine. [Pausing.]——But I may be reveng'd; and that's the same thing. Ah sweet Revenge! Thou welcome Thought, thou healing Balsam to my wounded Soul! Be but propitious on this one Occasion, I'll place my Heaven in thee, for all my Life to come.
To Woman how indulgent Nature's kind!No Blast of Fortune long disturbs her Mind:Compliance to her Fate supports her still;If Love won't make her happy—Mischief will.
To Woman how indulgent Nature's kind!No Blast of Fortune long disturbs her Mind:Compliance to her Fate supports her still;If Love won't make her happy—Mischief will.
[Exeunt.