Happy couples, lightly treading,Castle chapel will be quite full!Each shall have a pretty wedding,As, of course, is only rightful,Though the brides be fair or frightful.Contradiction little dreading,This will be a day delightful—Each shall have a pretty wedding!Such a pretty, pretty wedding!Such a pretty wedding!(All dance off to get married as the curtain falls.)
THE END
OR, THE LASS THAT LOVED A SAILORLibretto by William S. GilbertMusic by Sir Arthur Sullivan
DRAMATIS PERSONAETHE RT.HON SIR JOSEPH PORTER, K.C.B. (First Lord of the Admiralty).CAPTAIN CORCORAN (Commanding H.M.S. Pinafore).TOM TUCKER (Midshipmite).RALPH RAKESTRAW (Able Seaman).DICK DEADEYE (Able Seaman).BILL BOBSTAY (Boatswain's Mate).BOB BECKET (Carpenter's Mate).JOSEPHINE (the Captain's Daughter).HEBE (Sir Joseph Porter's First Cousin).MRS. CRIPPS (LITTLE BUTTERCUP) (A Portsmouth Bumboat Woman).First Lord's Sisters, his Cousins, his Aunts, Sailors, Marines, etc.Scene: QUARTER-DECK OF H.M.S. PINAFORE, OFF PORTSMOUTHACT I.—Noon. ACT II.—NightFirst produced at the Opera Comique on May 25, 1878.
SCENE—Quarter-deck of H.M.S. Pinafore. Sailors, led by BOATSWAIN,discovered cleaning brasswork, splicing rope, etc.CHORUSWe sail the ocean blue,And our saucy ship's a beauty;We're sober men and true,And attentive to our duty.When the balls whistle freeO'er the bright blue sea,We stand to our guns all day;When at anchor we rideOn the Portsmouth tide,We have plenty of time to play.Enter LITTLE BUTTERCUP, with large basket on her armRECITATIVEHail, men-o'-war's men-safeguards of your nationHere is an end, at last, of all privation;You've got your play—spare all you can affordTo welcome Little Buttercup on board.ARIAFor I'm called Little Buttercup—dear Little Buttercup,Though I could never tell why,But still I'm called Buttercup—poor little Buttercup,Sweet Little Buttercup I!I've snuff and tobaccy, and excellent jacky,I've scissors, and watches, and knivesI've ribbons and laces to set off the facesOf pretty young sweethearts and wives.I've treacle and toffee, I've tea and I've coffee,Soft tommy and succulent chops;I've chickens and conies, and pretty polonies,And excellent peppermint drops.Then buy of your Buttercup—dear Little Buttercup;Sailors should never be shy;So, buy of your Buttercup—poor Little Buttercup;Come, of your Buttercup buy!BOAT. Aye, Little Buttercup—and well called—for you're therosiest,the roundest, and the reddest beauty in all Spithead.BUT. Red, am I? and round—and rosy! Maybe, for I havedissembled well!But hark ye, my merry friend—hast ever thought that beneath agay andfrivolous exterior there may lurk a canker-worm which is slowlybutsurely eating its way into one's very heart?BOAT. No, my lass, I can't say I've ever thought that.Enter DICK DEADEYE. He pushes through sailors, and comes downDICK. I have thought it often. (All recoil from him.)BUT. Yes, you look like it! What's the matter with the man?Isn't hewell?BOAT. Don't take no heed of him; that's only poor Dick Deadeye.DICK. I say—it's a beast of a name, ain't it—Dick Deadeye?BUT. It's not a nice name.DICK. I'm ugly too, ain't I?BUT. You are certainly plain.DICK. And I'm three-cornered too, ain't I?BUT. You are rather triangular.DICK. Ha! ha! That's it. I'm ugly, and they hate me for it; foryou allhate me, don't you?ALL. We do!DICK. There!BOAT. Well, Dick, we wouldn't go for to hurt any fellowcreature'sfeelings, but you can't expect a chap with such a name as DickDeadeye tobe a popular character—now can you?DICK. No.BOAT. It's asking too much, ain't it?DICK. It is. From such a face and form as mine the noblestsentimentssound like the black utterances of a depraved imagination It ishumannature—I am resigned.RECITATIVEBUT. (looking down hatchway).But, tell me—who's the youth whose faltering feetWith difficulty bear him on his course?BOAT. That is the smartest lad in all the fleet—Ralph Rackstraw!BUT. Ha! That name! Remorse! remorse!Enter RALPH from hatchwayMADRIGAL—RALPHThe NightingaleSighed for the moon's bright rayAnd told his taleIn his own melodious way!He sang "Ah, well-a-day!"ALL. He sang "Ah, well-a-day!"The lowly valeFor the mountain vainly sighed,To his humble wailThe echoing hills replied.They sang "Ah, well-a-day!"All. They sang "Ah, well-a-day!"RECITATIVEI know the value of a kindly chorus,But choruses yield little consolationWhen we have pain and sorrow too before us!I love—and love, alas, above my station!BUT. (aside). He loves—and loves a lass above his station!ALL (aside). Yes, yes, the lass is much above his station!Exit LITTLE BUTTERCUPBALLAD — RALPHA maiden fair to see,The pearl of minstrelsy,A bud of blushing beauty;For whom proud nobles sigh,And with each other vieTo do her menial's duty.ALL. To do her menial's duty.A suitor, lowly born,With hopeless passion torn,And poor beyond denying,Has dared for her to pineAt whose exalted shrineA world of wealth is sighing.ALL. A world of wealth is sighing.Unlearned he in aughtSave that which love has taught(For love had been his tutor);Oh, pity, pity me—Our captain's daughter she,And I that lowly suitor!ALL. And he that lowly suitor!BOAT. Ah, my poor lad, you've climbed too high: our worthycaptain'schild won't have nothin' to say to a poor chap like you. Willshe, lads?ALL. No, no.DICK. No, no, captains' daughters don't marry foremast hands.ALL (recoiling from him). Shame! shame!BOAT. Dick Deadeye, them sentiments o' yourn are a disgrace toourcommon natur'.RALPH, But it's a strange anomaly, that the daughter of a manwho hailsfrom the quarter-deck may not love another who lays out on thefore-yardarm. For a man is but a man, whether he hoists his flag at themain-truckor his slacks on the main-deck.DICK. Ah, it's a queer world!RALPH. Dick Deadeye, I have no desire to press hardly on you,but sucha revolutionary sentiment is enough to make an honest sailorshudder.BOAT. My lads, our gallant captain has come on deck; let usgreet himas so brave an officer and so gallant a seaman deserves.Enter CAPTAIN CORCORANRECITATIVECAPT. My gallant crew, good morning.ALL (saluting). Sir, good morning!CAPT. I hope you're all quite well.ALL(as before). Quite well; and you, sir?CAPT. I am in reasonable health, and happyTo meet you all once more.ALL (as before). You do us proud, sir!SONG—CAPTAINCAPT. I am the Captain of the Pinafore;ALL. And a right good captain, toolYou're very, very good,And be it understood,I command a right good crew,ALL. We're very, very good,And be it understood,He commands a right good crew.CAPT. Though related to a peer,I can hand, reef, and steer,And ship a selvagee;I am never known to quailAt the furry of a gale,And I'm never, never sick at sea!ALL. What, never?CAPT. No, never!ALL. What, never?CAPT. Hardly ever!ALL. He's hardly ever sick at sealThen give three cheers, and one cheer more,For the hardy Captain of the Pinafore!CAPT. I do my best to satisfy you all—ALL. And with you we're quite content.CAPT. You're exceedingly polite,And I think it only rightTo return the compliment.ALL. We're exceedingly polite,And he thinks it's only rightTo return the compliment.CAPT. Bad language or abuse,I never, never use,Whatever the emergency;Though "Bother it" I mayOccasionally say,I never use a big, big D—ALL. What, never?CAPT. No, never!ALL. What, never?CAPT. Hardly ever!ALL. Hardly ever swears a big, big D—Then give three cheers, and one cheer more,For the well-bred Captain of the Pinafore![After song exeunt all butCAPTAIN]Enter LITTLE BUTTERCUPRECITATIVEBUT. Sir, you are sad! The silent eloquenceOf yonder tear that trembles on your eyelashProclaims a sorrow far more deep than common;Confide in me—fear not—I am a mother!CAPT. Yes, Little Buttercup, I'm sad and sorry—My daughter, Josephine, the fairest flowerThat ever blossomed on ancestral timber,Is sought in marriage by Sir Joseph Porter,Our Admiralty's First Lord, but for some reasonShe does not seem to tackle kindly to it.BUT, (with emotion). Ah, poor Sir Joseph! Ah, I know too wellThe anguish of a heart that loves but vainly!But see, here comes your most attractive daughter.I go—Farewell![Exit.CAPT. (looking after her). A plump and pleasing person![Exit.Enter JOSEPHINE, twining some flowers which she carries in asmallbasketBALLAD JOSEPHINESorry her lot who loves too well,Heavy the heart that hopes but vainly,Sad are the sighs that own the spell,Uttered by eyes that speak too plainly;Heavy the sorrow that bows the headWhen love is alive and hope is dead!Sad is the hour when sets the sun—Dark is the night to earth's poor daughters,When to the ark the wearied oneFlies from the empty waste of waters!Heavy the sorrow that bows the headWhen love is alive and hope is dead!Enter CAPTAINCAPT. My child, I grieve to see that you are a prey tomelancholy. Youshould look your best to-day, for Sir Joseph Porter, K.C.B., willbe herethis afternoon to claim your promised hand.JOS. Ah, father, your words cut me to the quick. I can esteem—reverence—venerate Sir Joseph, for he is a great and good man;but oh, Icannot love him! My heart is already given.CAPT. (aside). It is then as I feared. (Aloud.) Given? And towhom? Notto some gilded lordling?JOS. No, father—the object of my love is no lordling. Oh, pityme, forhe is but a humble sailor on board your own ship!CAPT. Impossible!JOS. Yes, it is true.CAPT. A common sailor? Oh fie!JOS. I blush for the weakness that allows me to cherish such apassion.I hate myself when I think of the depth to which I have stoopedinpermitting myself to think tenderly of one so ignobly born, but Ilovehim! I love him! I love him! (Weeps.)CAPT. Come, my child, let us talk this over. In a matter of theheart Iwould not coerce my daughter—I attach but little value to rankorwealth, but the line must be drawn somewhere. A man in thatstation maybe brave and worthy, but at every step he would commit solecismsthatsociety would never pardon.JOS. Oh, I have thought of this night and day. But fear not,father, Ihave a heart, and therefore I love; but I am your daughter, andthereforeI am proud. Though I carry my love with me to the tomb, he shallnever,never know it.CAPT. You are my daughter after all. But see, Sir Joseph'sbargeapproaches, manned by twelve trusty oarsmen and accompanied bytheadmiring crowd of sisters, cousins, and aunts that attend himwherever hegoes. Retire, my daughter, to your cabin—take this, hisphotograph, withyou—it may help to bring you to a more reasonable frame of mind.JOS. My own thoughtful father![Exit JOSEPHINE. CAPTAIN remains and ascends the poop-deck.BARCAROLLE. (invisible)Over the bright blue seaComes Sir Joseph Porter, K.C.B.,Wherever he may goBang-bang the loud nine-pounders go!Shout o'er the bright blue seaFor Sir Joseph Porter, K.C.B.[During this the Crew have entered on tiptoe, listeningattentive tothe song.CHORUS OF SAILORSSir Joseph's barge is seen,And its crowd of blushing beauties,We hope he'll find us clean,And attentive to our duties.We sail, we sail the ocean blue,And our saucy ship's a beauty.We're sober, sober men and trueAnd attentive to our duty.We're smart and sober men,And quite devoid of fe-ar,In all the Royal N.None are so smart as we are.Enter SIR JOSEPH'S FEMALE RELATIVES(They dance round stage)REL. Gaily tripping,Lightly skipping,Flock the maidens to the shipping.SAILORS. Flags and guns and pennants dipping!All the ladies love the shipping.REL. Sailors sprightlyAlways rightlyWelcome ladies so politely.SAILORS. Ladies who can smile so brightly,Sailors welcome most politely.CAPT. (from poop). Now give three cheers, I'll lead the wayALL. Hurrah! hurrah! hurrah! hurray!Enter SIR JOSEPH with COUSIN HEBESONG—SIR JOSEPHI am the monarch of the sea,The ruler of the Queen's Navee,Whose praise Great Britain loudly chants.COUSIN HEBE. And we are his sisters, and his cousins and hisaunts!REL. And we are his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts!SIR JOSEPH. When at anchor here I ride,My bosom swells with pride,And I snap my fingers at a foeman'staunts;COUSIN HEBE. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts!ALL. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts!SIR JOSEPH. But when the breezes blow,I generally go below,And seek the seclusion that a cabin grants;COUSIN HEBE. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts!ALL. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts!His sisters and his cousins,Whom he reckons up by dozens,And his aunts!SONG — SIR JOSEPHWhen I was a lad I served a termAs office boy to an Attorney's firm.I cleaned the windows and I swept the floor,And I polished up the handle of the big front door.I polished up that handle so carefulleeThat now I am the Ruler of the Queen's Navee!CHORUS.—He polished, etc.As office boy I made such a markThat they gave me the post of a junior clerk.I served the writs with a smile so bland,And I copied all the letters in a big round hand—I copied all the letters in a hand so free,That now I am the Ruler of the Queen's Navee!CHORUS.- He copied, etc.In serving writs I made such a nameThat an articled clerk I soon became;I wore clean collars and a brand-new suitFor the pass examination at the Institute,And that pass examination did so well for me,That now I am the Ruler of the Queen's Navee!CHORUS.—And that pass examination, etc.Of legal knowledge I acquired such a gripThat they took me into the partnership.And that junior partnership, I ween,Was the only ship that I ever had seen.But that kind of ship so suited me,That now I am the Ruler of the Queen's Navee!CHORUS.- But that kind, etc.I grew so rich that I was sentBy a pocket borough into Parliament.I always voted at my party's call,And I never thought of thinking for myself at all.I thought so little, they rewarded meBy making me the Ruler of the Queen's Navee!CHORUS.- He thought so little, etc.Now landsmen all, whoever you may be,If you want to rise to the top of the tree,If your soul isn't fettered to an office stool,Be careful to be guided by this golden rule—Stick close to your desks and never go to sea,And you all may be rulers of the Queen's Navee!CHORUS.—Stick close, etc.SIR JOSEPH. You've a remarkably fine crew, Captain Corcoran.CAPT. It is a fine crew, Sir Joseph.SIR JOSEPH. (examining a very small midshipman). A Britishsailor is asplendid fellow, Captain Corcoran.CAPT. A splendid fellow indeed, Sir Joseph.SIR JOSEPH. I hope you treat your crew kindly, CaptainCorcoran.CAPT. Indeed I hope so, Sir Joseph.SIR JOSEPH, Never forget that they are the bulwarks ofEngland'sgreatness, Captain Corcoran.CAPT. So I have always considered them, Sir Joseph.SIR JOSEPH. No bullying, I trust—no strong language of anykind, eh?CAPT. Oh, never, Sir Joseph.SIR JOSEPH. What, never?CAPT. Hardly ever, Sir Joseph. They are an excellent crew, anddo theirwork thoroughly without it.SIR JOSEPH. Don't patronise them, sir—pray, don't patronisethem.CAPT. Certainly not, Sir Joseph.SIR JOSEPH. That you are their captain is an accident of birth.Icannot permit these noble fellows to be patronised because anaccident ofbirth has placed you above them and them below you.CAPT. I am the last person to insult a British sailor, SirJoseph.SIR JOSEPH. You are the last person who did, Captain Corcoran.Desirethat splendid seaman to step forward.(DICK comes forward)SIR JOSEPH. No, no, the other splendid seaman.CAPT. Ralph Rackstraw, three paces to the front—march!SIR JOSEPH (sternly). If what?CAPT. I beg your pardon—I don't think I understand you.SIR JOSEPH. If you please.CAPT. Oh, yes, of course. If you please. (RALPH steps forward.)SIR JOSEPH. You're a remarkably fine fellow.RALPH. Yes, your honour.SIR JOSEPH. And a first-rate seaman, I'll be bound.RALPH. There's not a smarter topman in the Navy, your honour,though Isay it who shouldn't.SIR JOSEPH. Not at all. Proper self-respect, nothing more. Canyoudance a hornpipe?RALPH. No, your honour.SIR JOSEPH. That's a pity: all sailors should dance hornpipes.I willteach you one this evening, after dinner. Now tell me—don't beafraid—how does your captain treat you, eh?RALPH. A better captain don't walk the deck, your honour.ALL. Aye; Aye!SIR JOSEPH. Good. I like to hear you speak well of yourcommandingofficer; I daresay he don't deserve it, but still it does youcredit. Canyou sing?RALPH. I can hum a little, your honour.SIR JOSEPH. Then hum this at your leisure. (Giving him MS.music.) Itis a song that I have composed for the use of the Royal Navy. Itisdesigned to encourage independence of thought and action in thelowerbranches of the service, and to teach the principle that aBritish sailoris any man's equal, excepting mine. Now, Captain Corcoran, a wordwithyou in your cabin, on a tender and sentimental subject.CAPT. Aye, aye,Sir Joseph (Crossing) Boatswain, in commemoration of thisjoyousoccasion, see that extra grog is served out to the ship's companyatseven bells.BOAT. Beg pardon. If what, your honour?CAPT. If what? I don't think I understand you.BOAT. If you please, your honour.CAPT. What!SIR JOSEPH. The gentleman is quite right. If you please.CAPT. (stamping his foot impatiently). If you please!
[Exit.SIR JOSEPH. For I hold that on the seasThe expression, "if you please",A particularly gentlemanly tone implants.COUSIN HEBE. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts!ALL. And so do his sisters, and his cousins, and hisaunts![Exeunt SIR JOSEPH ANDRELATIVES.BOAT. Ah! Sir Joseph's true gentleman; courteous andconsiderate to thevery humblest.RALPH. True, Boatswain, but we are not the very humblest. SirJosephhas explained our true position to us. As he says, a Britishseaman isany man's equal excepting his, and if Sir Joseph says that, is itnot ourduty to believe him?ALL. Well spoke! well spoke!DICK. You're on a wrong tack, and so is he. He means well, buthe don'tknow. When people have to obey other people's orders, equality'sout ofthe question.ALL (recoiling). Horrible! horrible!BOAT. Dick Deadeye, if you go for to infuriate this here ship'scompanytoo far, I won't answer for being able to hold 'em in. I'mshocked!that's what I am—shocked!RALPH. Messmates, my mind's made up. I'll speak to thecaptain'sdaughter, and tell her, like an honest man, of the honest love Ihave forher.ALL. Aye, aye!RALPH. Is not my love as good as another's? Is not my heart astrue asanother's? Have I not hands and eyes and ears and limbs likeanother?ALL. Aye, Aye!RALPH. True, I lack birth—BOAT. You've a berth on board this very ship.RALPH. Well said—I had forgotten that. Messmates—what do yousay? Doyou approve my determination?ALL. We do.DICK. I don t.BOAT. What is to be done with this here hopeless chap? Let ussing himthe song that Sir Joseph has kindly composed for us. Perhaps itwillbring this here miserable creetur to a proper state of mind.GLEE!—RALPH, BOATSWAIN, BOATSWAIN'S MATE, and CHORUSA British tar is a soaring soul,As free as a mountain bird,His energetic fist should be ready to resistA dictatorial word.His nose should pant and his lip should curl,His cheeks should flame and his brow should furl,His bosom should heave and his heart should glow,And his fist be ever ready for a knock-down blow.CHORUS.—His nose should pant, etc.His eyes should flash with an inborn fire,His brow with scorn be wrung;He never should bow down to a domineering frown,Or the tang of a tyrant tongue.His foot should stamp and his throat should growl,His hair should twirl and his face should scowl;His eyes should flash and his breast protrude,And this should be his customary attitude—(pose).CHORUS.—His foot should stamp, etc.[All dance off excepting RALPH, who remains, leaning pensivelyagainstbulwark.Enter JOSEPHINE from cabinJOS. It is useless—Sir Joseph's attentions nauseate me. I knowthat heis a truly great and good man, for he told me so himself, but tome heseems tedious, fretful, and dictatorial. Yet his must be a mindof nocommon order, or he would not dare to teach my dear father todance ahornpipe on the cabin table. (Sees RALPH.) Ralph Rackstraw!(Overcome byemotion.)RALPH. Aye, lady—no other than poor Ralph Rackstraw!JOS. (aside). How my heart beats! (Aloud) And why poor, Ralph?RALPH. I am poor in the essence of happiness, lady—rich onlyin never-ending unrest. In me there meet a combination of antitheticalelementswhich are at eternal war with one another. Driven hither byobjectiveinfluences—thither by subjective emotions—wafted one momentintoblazing day, by mocking hope—plunged the next into the Cimmeriandarkness of tangible despair, I am but a living ganglion ofirreconcilable antagonisms. I hope I make myself clear, lady?JOS. Perfectly. (Aside.) His simple eloquence goes to my heart.Oh, ifI dared—but no, the thought is madness! (Aloud.) Dismiss thesefoolishfancies, they torture you but needlessly. Come, make one effort.RALPH (aside). I will—one. (Aloud.) Josephine!JOS. (Indignantly). Sir!RALPH. Aye, even though Jove's armoury were launched at thehead of theaudacious mortal whose lips, unhallowed by relationship, dared tobreathethat precious word, yet would I breathe it once, and thenperchance besilent evermore. Josephine, in one brief breath I willconcentrate thehopes, the doubts, the anxious fears of six weary months.Josephine, I ama British sailor, and I love you!JOS. Sir, this audacity! (Aside.) Oh, my heart, my beatingheart!(Aloud.) This unwarrantable presumption on the part of a commonsailor!(Aside.) Common! oh, the irony of the word! (Crossing, aloud.)Oh, sir,you forget the disparity in our ranks.RALPH. I forget nothing, haughty lady. I love you desperately,my lifeis in your hand—I lay it at your feet! Give me hope, and what Ilack ineducation and polite accomplishments, that I will endeavour toacquire.Drive me to despair, and in death alone I shall look forconsolation. Iam proud and cannot stoop to implore. I have spoken and I waityour word.JOS. You shall not wait long. Your proffered love I haughtilyreject.Go, sir, and learn to cast your eyes on some village maiden inyour ownpoor rank—they should be lowered before your captain's daughter.DUET—JOSEPHINE and RALPHJOS. Refrain, audacious tar,Your suit from pressing,Remember what you are,And whom addressing!(Aside.) I'd laugh my rank to scornIn union holy,Were he more highly bornOr I more lowly!RALPH. Proud lady, have your way,Unfeeling beauty!You speak and I obey,It is my duty!I am the lowliest tarThat sails the water,And you, proud maiden, areMy captain's daughter!(Aside.) My heart with anguish tornBows down before her,She laughs my love to scorn,Yet I adore her![Repeat refrain, ensemble, then exit JOSEPHINE into cabin.RALPH. (Recit.) Can I survive this overbearingOr live a life of mad despairing,My proffered love despised, rejected?No, no, it's not to be expected!(Calling off.)Messmates, ahoy!Come here! Come here!Enter SAILORS, HEBE, and RELATIVESALL. Aye, aye, my boy,What cheer, what cheer?Now tell us, pray,Without delay,What does she say—What cheer, what cheer?RALPH (to COUSIN HEBE). The maiden treats my suit with scorn,Rejects my humble gift, my lady;She says I am ignobly born,And cuts my hopes adrift, my lady.ALL. Oh, cruel one.DICK. She spurns your suit? Oho! Oho!I told you so, I told you so.SAILORS and RELATIVES.Shall { we } submit? Are { we } but slaves?they theyLove comes alike to high and low—Britannia's sailors rule the waves,And shall they stoop to insult? No!DICK. You must submit, you are but slaves;A lady she! Oho! Oho!You lowly toilers of the waves,She spurns you all—I told you so!RALPH. My friends, my leave of life I'm taking,For oh, my heart, my heart is breaking.When I am gone, oh, prithee tellThe maid that, as I died, I loved her well!ALL (turning away, weeping). Of life, alas! his leave he'staking,For ah! his faithful heart is breaking;When he is gone we'll surely tellThe maid that, as he died, he loved her well.[During Chorus BOATSWAIN has loaded pistol, which he hands toRALPH.RALPH. Be warned, my messmates allWho love in rank above you—For Josephine I fall![Puts pistol to his head. All the sailors stop theirears.Enter JOSEPHINE on deckJOS. Ah! stay your hand—I love you!ALL. Ah! stay your hand—she loves you!RALPH. (incredulously). Loves me?JOS. Loves you!ALL. Yes, yes—ah, yes,—she loves you!ENSEMBLESAILORS and RELATIVES and JOSEPHINEOh joy, oh rapture unforeseen,For now the sky is all serene;The god of day—the orb of love—Has hung his ensign high above,The sky is all ablaze.With wooing words and loving song,We'll chase the lagging hours along,And if {I find } the maiden coy,we findI'll } murmur forth decorous joyWe'llIn dreamy roundelays!DICK DEADEYEHe thinks he's won his Josephine,But though the sky is now serene,A frowning thunderbolt aboveMay end their ill-assorted loveWhich now is all ablaze.Our captain, ere the day is gone,Will be extremely down uponThe wicked men who art employTo make his Josephine less coyIn many various ways. [ExitDICK.JOS. This very night,HEBE. With bated breathRALPH. And muffled oar—JOS. Without a light,HEBE. As still as death,RALPH. We'll steal ashoreJOS. A clergymanRALPH. Shall make us oneBOAT, At half-past ten,JOS. And then we canRALPH Return, for noneBOAT. Can part them then!ALL. This very night, etc.(DICK appears at hatchway.)DICK. Forbear, nor carry out the scheme you've planned;She is a lady—you a foremast hand!Remember, she's your gallant captain's daughter,And you the meanest slave that crawls the water!ALL. Back, vermin, back,Nor mock us!Back, vermin, back,You shock us![Exit DICKLet's give three cheers for the sailor's brideWho casts all thought of rank aside—Who gives up home and fortune tooFor the honest love of a sailor true!For a British tar is a soaring soulAs free as a mountain bird!His energetic fist should be ready to resistA dictatorial word!His foot should stamp and his throat should growl,His hair should twirl and his face should scowl,His eyes should flash and his breast protrude,And this should be his customary attitude—(pose).GENERAL DANCEEND OF ACT I
Same Scene. Night. Awning removed. Moonlight. CAPTAINdiscoveredsinging on poop deck, and accompanying himself on amandolin. LITTLEBUTTERCUP seated on quarterdeck, gazing sentimentally athim.SONG—CAPTAINFair moon, to thee I sing,Bright regent of the heavens,Say, why is everythingEither at sixes or at sevens?I have lived hithertoFree from breath of slander,Beloved by all my crew—A really popular commander.But now my kindly crew rebel,My daughter to a tar is partial,Sir Joseph storms, and, sad to tell,He threatens a court martial!Fair moon, to thee I sing,Bright regent of the heavens,Say, why is everythingEither at sixes or at sevens?BUT. How sweetly he carols forth his melody to theunconsciousmoon! Of whom is he thinking? Of some high-born beauty? It maybe! Who ispoor Little Buttercup that she should expect his glance to fallon one solowly! And yet if he knew—if he only knew!CAPT. (coming down). Ah! Little Buttercup, still on board?That isnot quite right, little one. It would have been more respectableto havegone on shore at dusk.BUT, True, dear Captain—but the recollection of your sadpaleface seemed to chain me to the ship. I would fain see you smilebefore Igo.CAPT. Ah! Little Buttercup, I fear it will be long before Irecover my accustomed cheerfulness, for misfortunes crowd uponme, andall my old friends seem to have turned against me!BUT, Oh no—do not say "all", dear Captain. That wereunjust toone, at least.CAPT. True, for you are staunch to me. (Aside.) If ever Igave myheart again, methinks it would be to such a one as this! (Aloud.)I amtouched to the heart by your innocent regard for me, and were wedifferently situated, I think I could have returned it. But as itis, Ifear I can never be more to you than a friend.BUT, I understand! You hold aloof from me because you arerich andlofty—and I poor and lowly. But take care! The poor bumboatwoman hasgipsy blood in her veins, and she can read destinies.CAPT. Destinies?BUT. There is a change in store for you!CAPT. A change?BUT. Aye—be prepared!DUET—LITTLE BUTTERCUP and CAPTAINBUT, Things are seldom what they seem,Skim milk masquerades as cream;Highlows pass as patent leathers;Jackdaws strut in peacock's feathers.CAPT. (puzzled). Very true,So they do.BUT. Black sheep dwell in every fold;All that glitters is not gold;Storks turn out to be but logs;Bulls are but inflated frogs.CAPT. (puzzled). So they be,Frequentlee.BUT. Drops the wind and stops the mill;Turbot is ambitious brill;Gild the farthing if you will,Yet it is a farthing still.CAPT. (puzzled). Yes, I know.That is so.Though to catch your drift I'm striving,It is shady—it is shady;I don't see at what you're driving,Mystic lady—mystic lady.(Aside.) Stern conviction's o'er me stealing,That the mystic lady's dealingIn oracular revealing.BUT. (aside).Stern conviction's o'er him stealing,That the mystic lady's dealingIn oracular revealing.Yes, I know—That is so!CAPT. Though I'm anything but clever,I could talk like that for ever:Once a cat was killed by care;Only brave deserve the fair.Very true,So they do.CAPT. Wink is often good as nod;Spoils the child who spares the rod;Thirsty lambs run foxy dangers;Dogs are found in many mangers.BUT. Frequentlee,I agree.Paw of cat the chestnut snatches;Worn-out garments show new patches;Only count the chick that hatches;Men are grown-up catchy-catchies.BUT. Yes, I know,That is so.(Aside.) Though to catch my drift he's striving,I'll dissemble—I'll dissemble;When he sees at what I'm driving,Let him tremble—let him tremble!ENSEMBLEThough a mystic tone { I } borrow,youYou will } learn the truth with sorrow,I shallHere to-day and gone to-morrow;Yes, I know—That is so![At the end exit LITTLE BUTTERCUPmelodramatically.CAPT. Incomprehensible as her utterances are, I neverthelessfeel thatthey are dictated by a sincere regard for me. But to what newmisery isshe referring? Time alone can tell!Enter SIR JOSEPHSIR JOSEPH. Captain Corcoran, I am much disappointed with yourdaughter. In fact, I don't think she will do.CAPT. She won't do, Sir Joseph!SIR JOSEPH. I'm afraid not. The fact is, that although I haveurged mysuit with as much eloquence as is consistent with an officialutterance,I have done so hitherto without success. How do you account forthis?CAPT. Really, Sir Joseph, I hardly know. Josephine is of coursesensible of your condescension.SIR JOSEPH. She naturally would be.CAPT. But perhaps your exalted rank dazzles her.SIR JOSEPH. You think it does?CAPT. I can hardly say; but she is a modest girl, and hersocialposition is far below your own. It may be that she feels she isnotworthy of you.SIR JOSEPH. That is really a very sensible suggestion, anddisplaysmore knowledge of human nature than I had given you credit for.CAPT. See, she comes. If your lordship would kindly reason withher andassure her officially that it is a standing rule at the Admiraltythatlove levels all ranks, her respect for an official utterancemight induceher to look upon your offer in its proper light.SIR JOSEPH. It is not unlikely. I will adopt your suggestion.But soft,she is here. Let us withdraw, and watch our opportunity.Enter JOSEPHINE from cabin. FIRST LORD and CAPTAIN retireSCENE—JOSEPHINEThe hours creep on apace,My guilty heart is quaking!Oh, that I might retraceThe step that I am taking!Its folly it were easy to be showing,What I am giving up and whither going.On the one hand, papa's luxurious home,Hung with ancestral armour and old brasses,Carved oak and tapestry from distant Rome,Rare "blue and white" Venetian finger-glasses,Rich oriental rugs, luxurious sofa pillows,And everything that isn't old, from Gillow's.And on the other, a dark and dingy room,In some back street with stuffy children crying,Where organs yell, and clacking housewives fume,And clothes are hanging out all day a-drying.With one cracked looking-glass to see your facein,And dinner served up in a pudding basin!A simple sailor, lowly born,Unlettered and unknown,Who toils for bread from early momTill half the night has flown!No golden rank can he impart—No wealth of house or land—No fortune save his trusty heartAnd honest brown right hand!And yet he is so wondrous fairThat love for one so passing rare,So peerless in his manly beauty,Were little else than solemn duty!Oh, god of love, and god of reason, say,Which of you twain shall my poor heart obey!SIR JOSEPH and CAPTAIN enterSIR JOSEPH. Madam, it has been represented to me that you areappalledby my exalted rank. I desire to convey to you officially myassurance,that if your hesitation is attributable to that circumstance, itisuncalled for.JOS. Oh! then your lordship is of opinion that marriedhappiness is notinconsistent with discrepancy in rank?SIR JOSEPH. I am officially of that opinion.JOS. That the high and the lowly may be truly happy together,providedthat they truly love one another?SIR JOSEPH. Madam, I desire to convey to you officially myopinion thatlove is a platform upon which all ranks meet.JOS. I thank you, Sir Joseph. I did hesitate, but I willhesitate nolonger. (Aside.) He little thinks how eloquently he has pleadedhisrival's cause!TRIOFIRST LORD, CAPTAIN, and JOSEPHINECAPT. Never mind the why and wherefore,Love can level ranks, and therefore,Though his lordship's station's mighty,Though stupendous be his brain,Though your tastes are mean and flightyAnd your fortune poor and plain,CAPT. and Ring the merry bells on board-ship,SIR JOSEPH. Rend the air with warbling wild,For the union of { his } lordshipmyWith a humble captain's child!CAPT. For a humble captain's daughter—JOS. For a gallant captain's daughter—SIR JOSEPH. And a lord who rules the water—JOS. (aside). And a tar who ploughs the water!ALL. Let the air with joy be laden,Rend with songs the air above,For the union of a maidenWith the man who owns her love!SIR JOSEPH. Never mind the why and wherefore,Love can level ranks, and therefore,Though your nautical relation (alluding to CAPT.)In my set could scarcely pass—Though you occupy a stationIn the lower middle class—CAPT. and Ring the merry bells on board-ship,SIR JOSEPH Rend the air with warbling wild,For the union of { my } lordshipyourWith a humble captain's child!CAPT. For a humble captain's daughter—JOS. For a gallant captain's daughter—SIR JOSEPH. And a lord who rules the water—JOS. (aside). And a tar who ploughs the water!ALL. Let the air with joy be laden,Rend with songs the air above,For the union of a maidenWith the man who owns her love!JOS. Never mind the why and wherefore,Love can level ranks, and thereforeI admit the jurisdiction;Ably have you played your part;You have carried firm convictionTo my hesitating heart.CAPT. and Ring the merry bells on board-ship,SIR JOSEPH. Rend the air with warbling wild,For the union of { my } lordshiphisWith a humble captain's child!CAPT. For a humble captain's daughter—JOS. For a gallant captain's daughter—SIR JOSEPH. And a lord who rules the water—JOS. (aside). And a tar who ploughs the water!(Aloud.) Let the air with joy be laden.CAPT. and SIR JOSEPH. Ring the merry bells on board-ship—JOS. For the union of a maiden—CAPT. and SIR JOSEPH. For her union with his lordship.ALL. Rend with songs the air aboveFor the man who owns her love![Exit JOS.CAPT. Sir Joseph, I cannot express to you my delight at thehappyresult of your eloquence. Your argument was unanswerable.SIR JOSEPH. Captain Corcoran, it is one of the happiestcharacteristicsof this glorious country that official utterances are invariablyregardedas unanswerable. [Exit SIRJOSEPH.CAPT. At last my fond hopes are to be crowned. My only daughteris tobe the bride of a Cabinet Minister. The prospect is Elysian.(During thisspeech DICK DEADEYE has entered.)DICK. Captain.CAPT. Deadeye! You here? Don't! (Recoiling from him.)DICK. Ah, don't shrink from me, Captain. I'm unpleasant to lookat, andmy name's agin me, but I ain't as bad as I seem.CAPT. What would you with me?DICK (mysteriously). I'm come to give you warning.CAPT. Indeed! do you propose to leave the Navy then?DICK. No, no, you misunderstand me; listen!DUETCAPTAIN and DICK DEADEYEDICK. Kind Captain, I've important information,Sing hey, the kind commander that you are,About a certain intimate relation,Sing hey, the merry maiden and the tar.BOTH. The merry maiden and the tar.CAPT. Good fellow, in conundrums you are speaking,Sing hey, the mystic sailor that you are;The answer to them vainly I am seeking;Sing hey, the merry maiden and the tar.BOTH The merry maiden and the tar.DICK. Kind Captain, your young lady is a-sighing,Sing hey, the simple captain that you are,This very might with Rackstraw to be flying;Sing hey, the merry maiden and the tar.BOTH. The merry maiden and the tar.CAPT. Good fellow, you have given timely warning,Sing hey, the thoughtful sailor that you are,I'll talk to Master Rackstraw in the morning:Sing hey, the cat-o'-nine-tails and the tar.(Producing a"cat".)BOTH. The merry cat-o'-nine-tails and the tar!CAPT. Dick Deadeye—I thank you for your warning—I will atonce takemeans to arrest their flight. This boat cloak will afford meampledisguise—So! (Envelops himself in a mysterious cloak, holding itbeforehis face.)DICK. Ha, ha! They are foiled—foiled—foiled!Enter Crew on tiptoe, with RALPH and BOATSWAIN meetingJOSEPHINE, whoenters from cabin on tiptoe, with bundle of necessaries, andaccompanied by LITTLE BUTTERCUP.ENSEMBLECarefully on tiptoe stealing,Breathing gently as we may,Every step with caution feeling,We will softly steal away.(CAPTAIN stamps)—Chord.ALL (much alarmed). Goodness me—Why, what was that?DICK. Silent be,It was the cat!ALL. (reassured). It was—it was the cat!CAPT. (producing cat-o'-nine-tails). They're right, it was thecat!ALL. Pull ashore, in fashion steady,Hymen will defray the fare,For a clergyman is readyTo unite the happy pair!(Stamp as before, and Chord.)ALL. Goodness me,Why, what was that?DICK. Silent be,Again the cat!ALL. It was again that cat!CAPT. (aside). They're right, it was the cat!CAPT. (throwing off cloak). Hold! (All start.)Pretty daughter of mine,I insist upon knowingWhere you may be goingWith these sons of the brine,For my excellent crew,Though foes they could thump any,Are scarcely fit company,My daughter, for you.CREW. Now, hark at that, do!Though foes we could thump any,We are scarcely fit companyFor a lady like you!RALPH. Proud officer, that haughty lip uncurl!Vain man, suppress that supercilious sneer,For I have dared to love your matchless girl,A fact well known to all my messmates here!CAPT. Oh, horror!RALPH and Jos. { I } humble, poor, and lowly born,HeThe meanest in the port division—The butt of epauletted scorn—The mark of quarter-deck derision—Have } dare to raise { my } wormy eyesHas hisAbove the dust to which you'd mould { mehimIn manhood's glorious pride to rise,I am } an Englishman—behold { meHe is himALL. He is an Englishman!BOAT. He is an Englishman!For he himself has said it,And it's greatly to his credit,That he is an Englishman!ALL. That he is an Englishman!BOAT. For he might have been a Roosian,A French, or Turk, or Proosian,Or perhaps Itali-an!ALL. Or perhaps Itali-an!BOAT. But in spite of all temptationsTo belong to other nations,He remains an Englishman!ALL. For in spite of all temptations, etc.CAPT. (trying to repress his anger).In uttering a reprobationTo any British tar,I try to speak with moderation,But you have gone too far.I'm very sorry to disparageA humble foremast lad,But to seek your captain's child in marriage,Why damme, it's too bad[During this, COUSIN HEBE and FEMALE RELATIVES have entered.ALL (shocked). Oh!CAPT. Yes, damme, it's too bad!ALL. Oh!CAPT. and DICK DEADEYE. Yes, damme, it s too bad.[During this, SIR JOSEPH has appeared on poop-deck. He ishorrifiedat the bad language.HEBE. Did you hear him? Did you hear him?Oh, the monster overbearing!Don't go near him—don't go near him—He is swearing—he is swearing!SIR JOSEPH. My pain and my distress,I find it is not easy to express;My amazement—my surprise—You may learn from the expression of my eyes!CAPT. My lord—one word—the facts are not beforeyouThe word was injudicious, I allow—But hear my explanation, I implore you,And you will be indignant too, I vow!SIR JOSEPH. I will hear of no defence,Attempt none if you're sensible.That word of evil senseIs wholly indefensible.Go, ribald, get you henceTo your cabin with celerity.This is the consequenceOf ill-advised asperity[Exit CAPTAIN, disgraced, followed byJOSEPHINEALL. This is the consequence,Of ill-advised asperity!SIR JOSEPH. For I'll teach you all, ere long,To refrain from language strongFor I haven't any sympathy for ill-bredtaunts!HEBE. No more have his sisters, nor his cousins,nor hisaunts.ALL. For he is an Englishman, etc.SIR JOSEPH. Now, tell me, my fine fellow—for you are a finefellow—RALPH. Yes, your honour.SIR JOSEPH. How came your captain so far to forget himself? Iam quitesure you had given him no cause for annoyance.RALPH, Please your honour, it was thus-wise. You see I'm only atopman--a mere foremast hand—SIR JOSEPH. Don't be ashamed of that. Your position as a topmanis avery exalted one.RALPH. Well, your honour, love burns as brightly in thefo'c'sle as itdoes on the quarter-deck, and Josephine is the fairest bud thateverblossomed upon the tree of a poor fellow's wildest hopes.Enter JOSEPHINE; she rushes to RALPH'S armsJOS. Darling! (SIR JOSEPH horrified.)RALPH. She is the figurehead of my ship of life—the brightbeacon thatguides me into my port of happiness—that the rarest, the purestgem thatever sparkled on a poor but worthy fellow's trusting brow!ALL. Very pretty, very pretty!SIR JOSEPH. Insolent sailor, you shall repent this outrage.Seize him!(Two Marines seize him and handcuff him.)JOS. Oh, Sir Joseph, spare him, for I love him tenderly.SIR JOSEPH. Pray, don't. I will teach this presumptuous marinertodiscipline his affections. Have you such a thing as a dungeon onboard?ALL. We have!DICK. They have!SIR JOSEPH. Then load him with chains and take him there atonce!OCTETTERALPH. Farewell, my own,Light of my life, farewell!For crime unknownI go to a dungeon cell.JOS. I will atone.In the meantime farewell!And all aloneRejoice in your dungeon cell!SIR JOSEPH. A bone, a boneI'll pick with this sailor fell;Let him be shown at onceAt once to his dungeon cell.BOATSWAIN, DICK DEADEYE, and COUSIN HEBEHe'll hear no toneOf the maiden he loves so well!No telephoneCommunicates with his cell!BUT. (mysteriously). But when is knownThe secret I have to tell,Wide will be thrownThe door of his dungeon cell.ALL. For crime unknownHe goes to a dungeon cell![RALPH is led off incustody.SIR JOSEPH. My pain and my distressAgain it is not easy to express.My amazement, my surprise,Again you may discover from my eyes.ALL. How terrible the aspect of his eyes!BUT. Hold! Ere upon your lossYou lay much stress,A long-concealed crimeI would confess.SONG—BUTTERCUPA many years ago,When I was young and charming,As some of you may know,I practised baby-farming.ALL. Now this is most alarming!When she was young and charming,She practised baby-farming,A many years ago.BUT. Two tender babes I nursed:One was of low condition,The other, upper crust,A regular patrician.ALL (explaining to each other).Now, this is the position:One was of low condition,The other a patrician,A many years ago.BUT. Oh, bitter is my cup!However could I do it?I mixed those children up,And not a creature knew it!ALL. However could you do it?Some day, no doubt, you'll rue it,Although no creature knew it,So many years ago.BUT. In time each little waifForsook his foster-mother,The well born babe was Ralph—Your captain was the other!!!ALL. They left their foster-mother,The one was Ralph, our brother,Our captain was the other,A many years ago.SIR JOSEPH. Then I am to understand that Captain Corcoran andRalphwere exchanged in childhood's happy hour—that Ralph is reallytheCaptain, and the Captain is Ralph?BUT. That is the idea I intended to convey, officially!SIR JOSEPH. And very well you have conveyed it.BUT. Aye! aye! yer 'onour.SIR JOSEPH. Dear me! Let them appear before me, at once![RALPH. enters as CAPTAIN; CAPTAIN as a common sailor. JOSEPHINErushesto his armsJOS. My father—a common sailor!CAPT. It is hard, is it not, my dear?SIR JOSEPH. This is a very singular occurrence; I congratulateyouboth. (To RALPH.) Desire that remarkably fine seaman to stepforward.RALPH. Corcoran. Three paces to the front—march!CAPT. If what?RALPH. If what? I don't think I understand you.CAPT. If you please.SIR JOSEPH. The gentleman is quite right. If you please.RALPH. Oh! If you please. (CAPTAIN steps forward.)SIR JOSEPH (to CAPTAIN).You are an extremely fine fellow.CAPT. Yes, your honour.SIR JOSEPH. So it seems that you were Ralph, and Ralph was you.CAPT. SO it seems, your honour.SIR JOSEPH. Well, I need not tell you that after this change inyourcondition, a marriage with your daughter will be out of thequestion.CAPT. Don't say that, your honour—love levels all ranks.SIR JOSEPH. It does to a considerable extent, but it does notlevelthem as much as that. (Handing JOSEPHINE to RALPH.) Here — takeher,sir, and mind you treat her kindly.RALPH and JOS. Oh bliss, oh rapture!CAPT. and BUT. Oh rapture, oh bliss!SIR JOSEPH. Sad my lot and sorry,What shall I do? I cannot live alone!HEBE. Fear nothing—while I live I'll not desert you.I'll soothe and comfort your declining days.SIR JOSEPH. No, don't do that.HEBE. Yes, but indeed I'd rather—SIR JOSEPH (resigned). To-morrow morn our vows shall all beplighted,Three loving pairs on the same day united!QUARTETTEJOSEPHINE, HEBE, RALPH, and DEADEYEOh joy, oh rapture unforeseen,The clouded sky is now serene,The god of day—the orb of love,Has hung his ensign high above,The sky is all ablaze.With wooing words and loving song,We'll chase the lagging hours along,And if { he finds } the maiden coy,I findWe'll murmur forth decorous joy,In dreamy roundelay.CAPT. For he's the Captain of the Pinafore.ALL. And a right good captain too!CAPT. And though before my fallI was captain of you all,I'm a member of the crew.ALL. Although before his fall, etc.CAPT. I shall marry with a wife,In my humble rank of life! (turning to BUT.)And you, my own, are she—I must wander to and fro;But wherever I may go,I shall never be untrue to thee!ALL. What, never?CAPT. No, never!ALL. What, never!CAPT. Hardly ever!ALL. Hardly ever be untrue to thee.Then give three cheers, and one cheer moreFor the former Captain of the Pinafore.BUT. For he loves Little Buttercup, dear LittleButtercup,Though I could never tell why;But still he loves Buttercup, poor LittleButtercup,Sweet Little Buttercup, aye!ALL. For he loves, etc.SIR JOSEPH. I'm the monarch of the sea,And when I've married thee (to HEBE),I'll be true to the devotion that my loveimplants,HEBE. Then good-bye to his sisters, and hiscousins,and his aunts,Especially his cousins,Whom he reckons up by dozens,His sisters, and his cousins, and his aunts!ALL. For he is an Englishman,And he himself hath said it,And it's greatly to his creditThat he is an Englishman!CURTAIN